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Killua wakes up from his deep, lovely, beautiful slumber at noon, as he always does, ready to start another tedious day of cleaning his apartment, studying his textbooks, and hanging out with Gon come evening time. Usually they would lay on Killua's couch watching a movie and sharing popcorn or something else that was most definitely extremely unhealthy. Usually, Killua would pray Gon couldn't hear how loud his heartbeat was right then and there (usually, he could).
Gon is unusual. Killua knows this by now. So of course, it's only natural for Gon to randomly switch things up on Killua. Of course.
He opens his eyes to a smiling Gon, holding two cups full to the brim with coffee, steaming hot and just how Killua likes it.
Killua looks at him, confused and hazy from just waking up. Gon smiles at him and sets one of the cups down, sitting on the bed next to a stirring Killua. “Good morning, Killua! I hope you don’t mind that I let myself in. I made you some coffee to help you wake up. Do you know what today is?”
He gratefully accepts the cup, taking a slow sip of the chocolate-tasting goodness. He even used my favorite creamer. “Is it my birthday? I thought that was a couple months ago.”
Gon giggles, ruffling Killua’s bed head as if he were a cat. He receives a conflicting response of a purr and Killua pulling away from his hand. “No, silly, it’s New Year’s Eve! Also, I may or may not have invited Leorio and Kurapika over for a party tonight. How did you sleep?”
“I slept well - wait! You did what?” The statement clicking in Killua’s head wakes him up more than the coffee does. He usually prefers energy drinks, but in the moment he’d been so flattered by Gon’s thoughtful gesture that he hadn’t cared, nor had he chastised him for sneaking into his apartment. To be fair, Gon hadn’t ripped his curtains open, so he can’t quite be mad. He did give Gon his own key to the apartment, green and covered in cartoon frogs with tiny umbrellas, and bought the coffee machine strictly for his best friend, so he really, really can’t be mad. In all honesty, he’s not capable of staying angry at the green-haired boy, anyways.
Gon’s smile is light and laced with a tinge of regret. “I’ll buy you an energy drink when we go shopping to get stuff! It’s just, we haven’t hung out as a group in forever and I wouldn’t spend New Year’s with anyone other than you and your apartment is so much nicer than mine and you know how to organize things and please Killua, I need your help!”
Killua nods. He’ll admit, his apartment is pretty nice. He changes the sign on his apartment door often, always making sure to be a good neighbor. The interior of the tiny home is mainly made up of white, gray, and blue hues, with hints of green in the houseplants Gon had gifted him one year as a welcome home gift, saying they could have “matching houseplants” and Killua called him an idiot (but he still waters them with extra love and care). His cleaning routine is strict and thorough. It makes sense, really, why Gon would want to have a party in Killua’s home. He is the most organized by far, the least organized falling between Gon and Leorio. Leorio would claim that he’s a doctor, and “as long as my patients’ shit is organized, my life doesn’t have to be!” Gon’s excuse is simply, “I was at Killua’s today.”
He sighs, taking another long sip of his coffee. “Under two conditions.”
“Anything!” Gon smiles, taking Killua’s free hand in his own, and Killua thanks his lucky stars he doesn’t spill any coffee on his clean fucking blankets (all three of them).
He clears his throat, hoping Gon can’t feel his pulse pick up. “One, you buy me two Monsters, not just one. Two, I get to be DJ for the drive.”
Gon grins, practically jumping. Even at 18, Gon is as free-spirited as ever, and Killua is just as much in love, if not even more now with their growing age. Though he plans to never tell him that.
“I agree to your terms, your highness,” Gon giggles, kissing Killua’s hand and oh fuck he is kissing Killua’s hand what the fuck. “Now go get dressed! We’ve got lots to do today! I’m just gonna grab a hoodie, it’s cold out.”
He expects him to go dig through the drawer on Killua’s painted dresser that’s labeled in all caps, FROG’S DRAWER, but instead watches him dig through his closet, settling on a lavender hoodie that matched surprisingly well with his ripped jeans. Killua thanked all the gods the day Gon abandoned those bright green fucking booty shorts. But some days Gon wore shorts even shorter than those, and Killua was lucky to make it through the day. “Do you mind?” he asks, sticking his tongue out at Killua.
The boy in question giggles, shaking his head and making his way to his closet. He bumps hips with Gon, getting his outfit out and shoving him out of the door.
If he fell back in bed giggling like a teenage girl, face burning and eyes shining, no one would need to know.
-x-
Going to the store with Gon is like taking a toddler straight into a toy store - he wants everything. It doesn’t matter what it is, Gon just wants it. As much as Killua adores him and wants him to get everything his heart will ever desire, he finally snaps after Gon puts his fifth green hoodie in the cart. Sure, it’s not like it’s a Prada jacket that would cost more than his entire life, now peaceful and almost mundane without the nagging of his family, but Walmart still likes to get pricey on the bulky things! “Gon, I swear to God if you put one more fucking identical sweater in the cart I’m making you buy all of the party decorations. And food. Plus my two Monsters.”
Gon giggles sheepishly, placing three of the hoodies back on the rack. “Sorry, Killua,” he mumbles. Noticing the confused look on Killua’s face at the two remaining hoodies, he giggles again. “One is for me,” he explains, “and one is for you. They’re matching New Year’s Hoodies - a way of saying we’ll be together in the year to come.”
It’s stupid. Perhaps one of the most stupid things Gon has ever said to him, and he wants so badly for it to be meaningless. But alas, his heart skips multiple beats at the thought of Gon wanting to be with him another year, wanting to stay by Killua’s side as badly as he wants to stay by his. He feels the blush greet his cheeks immediately, familiar with the warmth brought to his face anytime Gon does anything remotely Gon-like. He ducks his head, muttering a tiny “Stupid” to no one in particular and Gon laughs, poking his cheek lightly.
They continue their shopping, Gon keeping up with his childlike antics and begging Killua to let him push him around in the cart, which receives a firm No every time. As they shop, Gon asks Killua as many questions as he can think of.
He’s silent for a moment, and Killua nearly sees the smoke coming out of Gon’s ears as he processes what he’s going to say. He holds back a chuckle and waits.
“Killua?” the frog-loving boy finally asks. His eyes are full of a determined curiosity and Killua wonders what kind of question he was going to be asked (and prays it won’t be embarrassing).
“Yeah, Gon?” He looks away from the teen’s eyes, flustered as he continues to examine the chips, mentally noting which kinds Kurapika has said they liked better.
“You’re so good at planning, and I know that’s from your childhood and all that, but… you’re just so considerate in your planning. It’s incredibly meticulous, but you plan in such a way that there’s no room for anyone to be disappointed. But, do you ever make room in your plans for your happiness, Kil~lu~a?”
The question completely catches Killua off guard. No one’s ever asked him that - he never even considered it himself, really. For Gon to stand in the middle of Walmart and ponder if Killua does things for himself at parties… he’s never felt more special.
“Quite some big words there, Gon.” A light punch to his arm. “I-I guess I don’t, no. I usually spend my time being a good host, so there’s no reason for me to worry about my wants.”
Gon frowns and Killua finds himself frowning along with him out of old habit. “You don’t even do things like buy your favorite kind of chips?”
Killua shakes his head and watches as Gon grabs the bag Killua had just put back (Leorio said they were too spicy for his liking, he didn’t want to mix chips by accident or-) and places them in the cart. Just as he’s about to protest, he’s cut off by the feeling of a warm hand grabbing his own and suddenly he can’t breathe. “I’ll pay for it, Killua. I want you to have a good New Year’s Eve party. I want you to have a good year, a good life. I want you to be happy. So I’m buying you the damn chips you stared at longingly for five minutes and tons of chocolate and you can’t stop me! Okay?”
And that, well, that already made Killua’s whole year, and it hasn’t even started yet. His world brightens the slightest bit as he mumbles, “Okay, Gon. Thank you.”
-x-
The drive home was mostly uneventful, except for Killua’s amazing music taste and Gon’s distracted driving due to seeing a butterfly. How he managed to get his license was a mystery and a miracle all at once.
And, of course, that one question Gon had asked in the car is still playing in Killua’s head, even as they are now decorating the apartment together. (He can’t help but find it all a bit romantic. Decorating together is something he’d read out of a book when he was younger, and he still views it as rather domestic. Not that he minds.)
The deep chirping of Gon’s voice and the tan hand resting on Killua’s thigh play on repeat in his mind, uncontrollably giving him chills every time the memory ends. Killua, do you think we’ll always be friends? the voice asks. Then the hand finds its way to its resting place and Killua sucks in a deep breath. No matter what happens? Even if… The caramel tinted eyes are full of wonder; full of mischief, full of want. Killua can’t breathe, senses flooding with Gon and it’s all he can do not to grab Gon by the collar of his matching green hoodie and kiss the living daylight out of him.
He wants it, he wants to know what that feels like so so badly, but he holds back. He doesn’t want to scare him off, of course.
He spares a glance over at the island boy, watching him as he stands on his tippy toes to adjust the banner he’d worked so hard to put up. Killua smiles to himself, continuing to adjust the white tablecloths around the apartment. He soon busies himself with pouring the snacks into their collective bowls, deciding on which pizza place would be better to call because it was too late to plan out a dinner, when suddenly he feels strong arms lift him off the ground. Out of reflex he starts to kick his legs a little before realizing it was Gon whose arms he’s in. He relaxes only the slightest amount, giggling out a question of why he’s in the air.
Gon’s giggle is breathy and light and Killua can feel each puff of air hit his body and is all of a sudden hyper aware of their close proximity. He wants to say something, but finds he’s too caught up in admiring the figure of the teen holding him to protest. “I wanted a chip,” he said easily, hand reaching for one of the bowls, “but I knew Killua would say no. So I picked him up. Kil~lu~a never says no when he’s flustered.”
“Gon!” he yelps, because oh fuck that sounds misleading and now he’s imagining things and f-.
Gon laughs, the throaty sound hot against the shell of Killua’s ear and he visibly shivers. He knows that Gon notices, feels how the breath gets closer, lips are ever-so-slightly placed on Killua’s ear and he holds back a whimper at the tension. His entire being is overtaken by want, and maybe, just maybe, Gon wants everything just as bad. Just maybe-
“Gon, Killua?” they hear a soft voice call.
Gon gently places Killua down, running to Killua’s doorway. “Kurapika! Leorio! I missed you so much!”
Cockblockers. I’m banning them from my apartment.
“Killua, it’s so good to see you!” Kurapika greets, small smile reaching their eyes.
Killua shakes off his previous thoughts and feels a genuine smile come to his face. He knows they’d be allowed over any time they wanted. “Hello, Kurapika, the pleasure is all mine. Where’s old man?”
“It’s Leorio, kid,” Leorio grumbles from the now full doorway. He tries to sound angry, but his overwhelming smile betrays him. “I was grabbing the cake from the trunk. Sunshine over here left without me. Good to see you, boys!”
Kurapika giggles, eyes bright at the pet name. “Sorry, love. I was overwhelmed by the amazing smell of Killua’s apartment. Your home looks lovely as ever.”
Killua blushes the slightest shade of pink. “Oh stop, get in here already! Thank you guys for the dessert, you didn’t need to.”
“Of course we did,” Leorio joins in. “You went out of your way to plan a beautiful party for all of us, it's the least we can do.”
“Hey, I helped too!” Gon yelps.
Killua laughs. “Yeah yeah, Green Boy helped too. Thank you guys.”
As they walk into the living area, Gon points out every decoration he put up, taking extreme pride in his one poster and the confetti on the coffee tables. So, so much pride. Killua doesn’t mention that he had to fix Gon’s poster. He glances at the time, 7:45, deciding it would be best to set an alarm on his phone for midnight. He has a feeling that he’d be trying to get away from the couple that was now in their company by the end of the night and doesn’t want to risk missing the moment for New Years. Maybe, if he’s reading the room right…
“Killua?”
“Hm?” he responds, snapping out of his daydream of tanned skin and soft lips, trying to forget how nice his pale hands would probably look on Gon’s sunkissed and freckled face.
“Did you hear what we’re playing?” Gon asks, scooting closer.
“No, I’m sorry. I was making a checklist of what I’ll have to get done tomorrow.” It’s a believable-enough lie.
Gon gives him a stern look. “Ne, Killua. No planning until January second!”
Killua sighs, a smirk resting on his face. “Yes sir, Gon. What were we playing?”
Gon blinks for a minute, cheeks - wait, is he blushing? Oh my God Gon is blushing right now was it because I called him sir oh fuck why would I do that I’m an idiot oh shit. He tries to ignore the sound of Leorio and Kurapika chuckling as quietly as they can, the sound muffled by their palms. “R-right, sorry. We’re playing Never-Have-I-Ever. I thought it would be a fun way to end the year!”
“Okay,” Killua says. “Let me grab apple juice first.”
“Why apple juice?” Leorio asks.
“Would you prefer I chug some vodka?”
“No!” the three scream in unison, all sharing a look of pure horror. Killua snickers at how distraught they look.
“Exactly. My house, my rules.”
He gets situated again, glancing at Leorio as if telling him you go first.
The game starts off simple and stupid as fuck, with statements like “Never have I ever chugged a bottle of hot sauce,” to which both Killua and Kurapika put their fingers down, or “Never have I ever peed in a bush,” which apparently Leorio was the only person to never actually do.
The game is going well, and for once Killua isn’t regretting his choice of playing a game with the group.
Until, of course, Leorio’s third turn.
“Never have I ever,” he pauses for dramatic effect, “not had a New Year’s kiss.”
He watches with a glint of mischief in his eyes as Gon and Killua put their fingers down. He had been with Kurapika for a few years now, so of course the two of them had shared New Year’s kisses with one another. Killua and Gon, though, had never even been on a date. Sure, Gon had been on “dates” with the older women back on Whale Island, but he never kissed them or anything like that. He didn’t really like them that much.
Kurapika shares a look Killua reads as understanding with Leorio and he’s going to murder the two of them of Kurapika asks what Killua thinks they’re going to ask. “Never have I ever not had a first kiss.”
Once again, Gon and Killua slowly lower their fingers.
“Really?!” Leorio gasps.
“We thought you two had, like, boned already.” Kurapika’s statement is terribly nonchalant for talking about two life-long best friends boning.
Killua’s apple juice is suddenly stuck in his throat and Gon jumps up to pat him on the back. “W-what?!” he splutters, barely able to breathe.
The two elders laugh together, and Killua has never felt such a strong hatred. He sighs, dismissing his thoughts. He smiles tightly. “I’m going to grab some water.”
He walks into the kitchen, Gon tailing him like a lost puppy. “Killua?”
“Yeah, Gon?”
“Are you okay?”
Killua sighs, turning to face him. He takes a sip from his newly grabbed water bottle. “Yeah, I’m fine. Just caught me off guard is all.” He notices an unsettled look on the boy’s face. Something else was wrong. “Gon? Are you okay?”
“Were you mad?” Gon snaps out, hand flying to his mouth.
“… Mad about what, Gon?”
Gon looks down at his feet. “Were you mad… that they implied they thought we’ve been together?”
Killua stares at him fondly. “No, Gon. I wasn’t mad. Just embarrassed that they were so… up front about their opinion, I guess. I’m not mad they thought we were together. I don’t mind at all.”
Gon looks up, a new courage filling his eyes. “Okay, Killua! Come on, let’s go finish the game!”
He finds himself being dragged into the living area and can’t seem to find a care in the world.
-x-
The clock is getting dangerously close to midnight, and Kurapika and Leorio haven’t been overly coupley. It feels far too good to be true. He almost has it in him to comment on it, but he doesn’t want to jinx his luck, especially with five minutes till midnight.
All of a sudden Kurapika is giggling with delight as Leorio pulls them on top of him, gently peppering their face in sweet kisses. Damn it, it was a jinx. Killua gawks at them, wondering how they could be so unabashed at this public show of affection. He expects Gon to share a look of incredulousness with him, but when he glances over he is met with a face of pure awe, doe eyes watching the scene play out. He looks at Killua with a joyful grin and grabs his wrist, leading him outside onto the balcony of his tiny apartment silently.
Gon only lets go to hold onto the railing, commenting on the beauty of the stars with golden eyes sparkling in the moonlight. Killua faintly wonders how Gon could be so entrancing without even trying. He then wonders if his hair is glowing in the moonlight, cursed white locks. He would never be able to beat Gon at laser tag. He takes a second to think that once Kurapika and Leorio come to their senses they’ll likely wonder where the two teens disappeared to, but shook off the thought soon after. He’d be lying to himself if he says they’ll come back to their senses at all tonight. More than likely, they’d give a sorry excuse that went something like, We’re really tired for some reason, we usually don’t stay up this late. We’re going to head back home now. Thank you for the lovely party, Killua. Happy New Year! and quickly scurry out of the door and drive through every red light.
“Gon,” he finds himself mumbling through his thoughts, though he doesn’t quite understand why. He’s perfectly happy with the peaceful silence, but apparently his mind has better things to do than soak up a sweet moment with the one he will never tell he loves. Curse his damn mind.
“Yeah, Killua?” He speaks softly, eyes latching onto Killua’s with great interest, as if what Killua has to say will be the most important thing in his life. Hell, maybe it will.
He hesitates for a moment before deciding it is too late to turn back. “Do you think, if we were to ever be separated for some reason, that we’d still be friends?”
Killua looks down at the grass below, praying what he asked wouldn’t be the wrong question. He knows his cheeks are painted a delicate scarlet and strays from glancing towards Gon, though he craves to see his reaction.
Gon hums softly for a moment before speaking up, voice appearing closer to Killua than before. “Killua, do you know I love you?”
Killua’s heart jumps to his throat in an instant and his neck nearly snaps in half from how fast he turns to face Gon, his entire face burning, ears tipped a rosy red. “You what?!” He knows he must have heard something wrong.
Gon smiles sheepishly, hand tracing Killua’s jaw, fingertips kissing every inch of his reddened face. “I said that I love you, Killua. Heaven knows how far I’d go for you. I’d go to the ends of the earth and more if it meant I got to spend every waking second with you, watching the way you make your way through life as if it’s the easiest damn thing you’ve ever done. So yeah, I think we’d still be friends, Killua. But I’d hope we’d be something more.”
Unable to say anything at all, too stunned by the love confession that came from his best friend in the whole world, Killua checks the time. 11:59.
He swallows the lump in his throat. “Hey Gon?”
He nods, still waiting for an answer from his best friend. “Yes?”
“Did you want to have your first New Year’s Kiss?”
An alarm goes off from Killua’s phone and he leans in, crashing his lips onto Gon’s.
The feeling is like nothing he’s ever imagined. It’s soft and warm; a push and pull feeling overflowing with passion and want. It’s gentle and harsh, slow and fast, and oh so right. It’s awkward and foreign, a mystery with every possible answer laid right in front of them, found within one another.
They pull away only when air makes itself necessary again. Killua feels cold now, his lips kissed raw and cheeks a dark flush. “Happy New Year,” he whispers against Gon’s lips.
“Happy New Year, Killua,” he whispers back, kissing him again.
-x-
“Hey Killua?” Gon asks, sliding into the bed next to Killua as if he’d been doing it his whole life (which, really, he kind of has). Kurapika and Leorio had already gone home, thanking Killua and congratulating the two boys.
“Yeah?”
“What was the best part of your year?”
Killua scoots closer to Gon, wrapping his arms around his petite body and pulling him closer. “You.”
The brunette smiles, a smile brighter than the sun could ever be. Killua thinks he might be a little more awake after seeing it. “Me too, Killua. I love you. Say it whenever you feel ready enough.”
He smiles gently, holding him close. He places a light kiss, delicate and sweet, on his lips. “I love you, too.”
Gon kisses him one more time, just because he can, before curling into him. “Goodnight Killua,” he whispers.
Killua kisses his forehead, holding him tighter. It’s everything he’s ever wanted and more. “Goodnight, Gon. Happy New Year.”
The next morning Killua's side is no longer warm with Gon's body, but he's awakened to two steaming cups of coffee on his bedside table and a beautiful, beautiful brown-eyed boy staring into his eyes, a peaceful smile resting on his face.