Chapter Text
Dear Dr Pierce,
I’m not Bess Truman, but will I do?
I saw your interview with Clete Roberts and felt compelled to write to you.
I should probably introduce myself. My name is Elizabeth ‘Bess’ Madeleine Williams, from Friendship, Maine, just across the water from a beautiful little town called Crabapple Cove. It has its own Dr Pierce, I wonder if you two are distantly related.
I struggled to believe some of the things said by the people of the 4077th, but then again I could. I do hope you’ll write back and tell me more.
Give good luck and love from Friendship, Maine, to the good men and women of the 4077th.
Very Best Wishes
Bess Williams
82 Harbor Road
Friendship, ME
Dear Miss Williams,
I wish I could describe to you the tonic of positivity your letter provided. I am a native of Crabapple Cove, Maine, and it’s Dr Pierce is my father. It’s so nice to hear from somebody who knows of it. I know Friendship quite well, my mother used to take me there sometimes when I was a little boy to visit friends of hers.
I was thrilled to receive your letter, a little piece of home that doesn’t know what’s going on out here. However, despite that respite from all this, I will tell you about the people here you were so interested in. I hope you don’t find them more interesting than me and decide to write to them instead.
Today I’ll tell you about Captain B.J. Hunnicutt. Nobody knows what B.J. stands for, he won’t tell us. B.J. is 6ft 2in of blonde, toned, tanned, californian muscle. He is a fantastic surgeon, and he is almost disgustingly in love with his wife Peg and daughter Erin. Erin was three months old when he was called out here, something I imagine he will always resent. He gets lots of letters from Peg, sometimes multiple a day, some from Erin (I think Peg does the writing), and his dog Waggle (I know Peg does the writing). B.J. replaced Trapper John, who got his points to go home, and fit in well. We have a gin still in our tent, The Swamp, and B.J. took to it like a fish to water. The gin we make, as revolting as it is, is probably cleaner than the water.
If you could, Miss Williams, would you go around to Crabapple Cove and just check in on my dad? I know it sounds silly but I’m worried that if he got sick he wouldn’t tell me so I wouldn’t worry. Just have a cup of coffee with him, tell him that you wrote to me and I’m sure he’ll welcome you with open arms. He may even adopt you.
Very Best Wishes, and lots of love to the residents of Crabapple Cove, ME
Benjamin “Hawkeye” Pierce
Dear Dr Pierce,
Thank you so much for your letter - I wasn’t sure you’d reply.
I’m so glad I can send messages from our little corner of Maine! I did as you asked and went to see your father over in Crabapple Cove. What a dear, sweet man he is. I took him some lobsters that my brother caught and he made us a wonderful chowder. I’m sure you know how it tastes. He’s a good man, and misses you terribly. He said to convey his love and pride.
Captain Hunnicutt sounds like a wonderful man - I feel so sorry for him having to leave his wife and baby, and the little one only three months old. My sister recently had a little girl, Angela Julienne. I think leaving her might kill her. Are you married, Dr Pierce?
They replayed your interview last night, and here are some of my initial thoughts on your comrades:
(They are initial because I simply concentrated on you the first time)
Major Burns seems like a bore. Why on earth do you think he became a doctor when he seems to lack any compassion?
Cpl O’Reilly seems like a very sweet young man, keeping things running for you. I imagine you can’t live without him.
Colonel Potter seems a good leader, with sense and compassion.
Cpl Klinger is quite the character. He seems like the sort of person who is great fun at a party.
I really felt for you when you spoke about not sleeping, and your heart pounding so hard it makes the bed shake. I can’t imagine it. I learnt from your father that you, like Captain Hunnicutt, are a ‘temporarily misassigned civilian’. It will be good to welcome you back to Maine.
Do let me know if my assumptions are close - and I’d love to know more, if you can bear it.
Sending love and lobsters from the good folks of Maine
Yours
Bess
Dear Bess,
First and foremost, thank you for going to see Dad. He wrote to me and told me how much he appreciated it. He also said you’re very pretty, and I’m inclined to take his word for it. You must call me Hawkeye in the future, all this Dr Pierce makes me feel like I am my father.
BJ Hunnicutt could be considered wonderful, but I myself am even more wonderful.
You’re pretty spot on with your assumptions, and I’m flattered that it took a second viewing to notice them.
Frank Burns is a walking malpractice lawsuit without a compassionate bone in his body. He is paranoid, boring, racist, and generally deplorable. I try and stay away but I have to share a tent with him.
Radar O’Reilly is a godsend. We’d be nowhere without him. His nickname is Radar because he can tell when things are going to happen, he can hear the choppers of wounded before anybody else can. It’s a phenomenal talent and very useful.
Colonel Potter is an old Cavalryman. He served in both the other wars, so he’s been around the block. He’s regular army but knows how to treat us so we don’t mutiny.
BJ couldn’t have said it better when he called himself a ‘temporarily misassigned civilian’.
Klinger wears dresses to try and get out of the army, trying to get a Section 8 discharge for being mad. He’ll have been at it two years in April.
The two remaining figures to talk about are Father Mulcahy and Major Houlihan.
Father Mulcahy is a mild mannered priest from Philly with a killer left hook - he boxes in his spare time. He works diligently in the OR too, helping us triage wounded and helping with operations.
Major Margaret Houlihan is the head nurse, and a woman to behold. The previous other inhabitant of our tent, The Swamp, who was replaced by B.J., Trapper John McIntyre, and I liked to torture her. The day we heard a general call her Hot Lips was the best day ever. She is in a ‘secret’ relationship with Burns, despite the fact that he’s married. They think they’re being discreet and they’re really not.
Again, thank you for visiting my dad, and please send me lots of news from Maine.
Yours
Hawkeye Pierce