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The loud bangs coming from Simon's video game had become background noise to Willhelm. The main thing he heard as he laid in Simon's arms was his soft breathing. It was peaceful, he felt the most at home than he had felt since he got to this school. A place he had only been one time before felt more like home than his own house. Somehow the thought didn't upset him, maybe he just couldn't be sad when he felt the embrace of his lover.
His eyes wandered around the other boys room trying to take it all in. This room was a piece of Simon and he wanted to learn every inch. It was nothing like his room. While his was big and empty, Simon's was intimate and cosy. He felt a warmth wash over him. No it wasn't the house that made him feel like that, it was Simon. Here in his arms felt like home. He wished he would just stay in here with him forever.
Forever with Simon. In this room where only the fish could see them. As he watched the fish swim around their tank. That's when he noticed something, "There's four fish, you only named three?" Willhelm asked.
"Sorry, got a little-"
"Horny?" Wille teased with a smile.
"Shut up," Simon lightly shoved him, careful that his boyfriend wouldn't get pushed off the bed. "I was going to say distracted."
To be fair Wille was also a bit distracted when he had asked the fishes names. With his hands around Simon he had just melted. Which was what was definitely happening now, not that he minded. In fact he pulled Simon closer. They were nose to nose now and his heart hammered. Still after knowing the other boy felt the same he felt the same as the first time they kissed.
"So what's the last one's name?"
"Isak." Simon answered, "After a character in the series Skam." Willhelm, who had only heard of fht show before, nodded before asking why. "It was the first show I saw with a gay lead and it was right around the time I realized, so I named a fish after him." A smile was playing at his lips as he talked about the series. Wille squeezed his hand in response.
-
"Have a nice Christmas." echoed in his head over and over again. That was it, they were over. Nothing he could do would change that. Wille had tried. A public hug was the most he could give, but it wasn't enough. Simon didn't want to be a secret and he understood that, but understanding didn't make it hurt any less. And it didn't stop the tears.
Wille just wished he had Erik to talk to. He would know what to do, he always did. The thought made a whole different wave of sorrow wash over him. Wille slumped further down the bed. He was all alone. And he was sick of thinking about it. He had gone to Erik's room for comfort but all it did was draw out the tears more.
Willhelm had no more tears left in him. He felt a numb pain from it all: the outing, Erik, and the break up. It was all too much. So he pulled out his laptop to distract himself. He hadn't realized what he was planning to do until Skam was already in the search bar. This was a show that was important to Simon, would watching it just hurt him more? Or would he be able to fall into the character's world for a while? With a heavy heart he hit play. This should at least keep him occupied for some time.
Willhelm didn't know what he was walking into. Not only did he fall in love with the characters, he felt seen. Seen for who he actually was not who the public or his mom expected him to be. Maybe for the first time.
Although he had never had a girlfriend before he felt Isak's struggles were all too familiar. The fear of being himself ate at both of them for too long. Isaak and Wille were very alike in that way. Except he knew unlike himself Isak would be with the boy in the end.
Prompted up on a pillow with a tear streaming down his face Wille watched the story of Isak and Even. He was totally lost in their love now. It was only when he finished hours later did Simon pop back into his mind. He was the reason Willhelm was even watching Skam. But everything would be okay as long as he took it minute by minute.