Chapter Text
Black clouded the edges of his vision, and Itachi struggled to open his eyes.
"Nii-san." Sasuke was crouched in the corner of the cave; there was a fire going, and dimly Itachi could see the lines on Sasuke's face.
"Sasuke." Itachi coughed, then curled up into himself, his hand on his chest. Sasuke moved quickly, grabbing Itachi by the arm.
"Don't strain yourself; you're still healing," Sasuke said.
"I don't understand..." Itachi swallowed, could still taste the blood at the back of his throat. "This is foolish, little brother. You forget that I am your enemy."
Sasuke ignored him, tossing a branch into the fire. "I know what you did," Sasuke said.
Itachi coughed again, his fist against his mouth. "Of course you know what I did; everybody knows what I did-"
"I know that you were under orders."
Itachi stopped. He looked up at Sasuke, who was watching him with tortured eyes. "Nii-san," Sasuke said. Tears in his voice. "Why did you let me hate you?"
And Sasuke began to weep. He sagged, his shoulders shaking. Slowly, Itachi pushed himself upright, then pressed a hand around his brother's back. The muscles in Sasuke's body loosened, and soon Itachi found himself gripping his brother, hard.
"Forgive me," Itachi said. He hugged Sasuke, tight. "Forgive me..."
The darkness curled around them, shapes of shadows engulfing them both.
It was starting to snow. Sasuke tended to the fire, stirring the ashes and watching the rise of the smoke. "Sasuke."
Sasuke turned and saw his brother lying on the mat; he pushed himself upright with difficulty. "It is cold," Itachi said. "Take my cloak; it will keep you warm."
Sasuke frowned, then tossed a branch into the flame. "That's an Akatsuki cloak," Sasuke said. "Besides, shouldn't you be the one wearing it?"
"I am underneath many layers of blankets, little brother. Whereas you are sitting with your shirt unbuttoned," Itachi said.
"Tch." Sasuke rolled his eyes, then pulled the cloak over his shoulders. Itachi leaned back, satisfied.
Time passed, and soon the fire began to wane. Sasuke poked the fire, frowning.
"Where do we go from here?" Sasuke asked.
"Nowhere," Itachi said. He coughed, pressing a hand to his mouth. "I am a missing-nin; staying with you would only put you in danger."
"You can't mean that." Sasuke stared. "There's still time. We can clear your name-"
"Sasuke." Itachi's eyes glittered, red in the dark. "We both know I do not have long." Itachi sighed, leaning heavily against the mattress. "It was my destiny to sacrifice myself for the good of Konoha. Now there is nothing left."
Sasuke gritted his teeth. "Nii-san. I swear to you, I will get revenge," Sasuke said.
Itachi closed his eyes. "Do not say these foolish things," Itachi said.
"Why?" Sasuke said. He threw off the cloak, clenching his hands into fists. "They took away your life!" Sasuke said. "All those years you've suffered! How can you sit there and act as if it's all okay?"
"Because I must," Itachi said. "Sasuke. You have a life. You have friends. They are searching for you as we speak-"
"I don't want to hear this," Sasuke said. He stood, pacing around the cave. Outside the wind grew stronger, the snow like ice in the cold.
"Sasuke," Itachi said, and Sasuke turned, his eyes flashing red.
"Wear the cloak," Itachi said.
"From now on, we will be Team Taka. And our mission..." Sasuke paused, as if for dramatic effect, "Will be to kill Danzo."
The rest of Team Hebi stared. "Who the fuck is Danzo?" Suigetsu said.
******
Itachi was still weak, and had to lean on Sasuke for support as they walked. Behind him, the rest of Team Taka watched, distrustfully. "I don't understand! I thought he wanted to kill him," Karin said. Jugo nodded, sympathetically. Behind them, Suigetsu rolled his eyes. "Tch. You're just jealous," Suigetsu said.
Karin's voice was dangerously low. "What did you say?"
"I said you're jealous. You're not the one Sasuke's holding right now," Suigetsu said.
Meanwhile, up in front, Itachi craned his neck, watching as the two Taka members began to hurl insults at each other, the woman dangerously close to using physical violence. "Oi, Karin! That hurts!" Suigetsu said.
"Are they always this way?" Itachi asked, quietly. Sasuke nodded, grimly.
"You get used to it," Sasuke said.
Sasuke sat perched at the edge of the cave, watching Itachi breathe. Just hours before, Sasuke had bodily hoisted his brother onto his back and dragged him, half-limping, toward the mouth of the cave. Despite his best efforts, Itachi was still unconscious, blood trickling down the corner of his mouth.
After Madara had told Sasuke what really happened, Sasuke had stumbled outside, searching for his brother's body. Madara had long since disappeared, vanishing in a whirl of smoke, but Sasuke would be damned if he let his brother remained unburied. It was still raining, then, and Sasuke had gritted his teeth, gripping the wound on his shoulder.
The body was still where Sasuke had left it: lying on the rock, splayed outward and facing the charcoal sky. Wet strands of hair stuck to his brother's face, and his skin was cool and pale. "Nii-san."
Sasuke's hand trembled. He sat on his knees, willing himself the strength to move Itachi's body. Hands clenched into fists and Sasuke squeezed his eyes; Itachi's own eyes were closed, blue-veined lids covering a milky haze. The rain fell, sliding down the sides of his brother's face, and Sasuke could swear it looked as if his brother were crying. "Nii-san...why?"
Thunder rolled; Sasuke's shoulders shook.
And then Itachi breathed.
As it turned out, old habits were hard to break.
Sasuke was brooding again. Itachi stared at him a moment, then poked his brother on the forehead.
"Oi!" Sasuke flinched, then batted Itachi's hand away. "Nii-san!"
"You are too grim, little brother," Itachi said, lightly. Sasuke glared, then rubbed his forehead.
"Why are you smiling?" Sasuke said, irritated. Itachi's mouth quirked.
"Because you are my little brother, and you do not wish to kill me," Itachi said. Sasuke glared, sourly.
"Keep poking me and I might change my mind," Sasuke said.
Itachi still remembers the moment he marked himself as a missing-nin. It was just hours after the massacre, and there was still dried blood underneath his fingernails. Slowly, he pulled out his head protector and clutched it, crying. Then he pulled out his kunai and dragged it across the metal emblem, scratching the leaf before tying it back on.
Now Itachi sits at the mouth of the cave, watching Sasuke finger his own head protector, the tip of his kunai digging into the metal.
"Do not do it," Itachi says. A light falls on Sasuke's face when he looks up; he pushes away his head protector, startled.
"Nii-san. I did not realize you were awake," Sasuke says. Itachi moves, then takes the head protector from him. Slowly he touches the cool metal with his fingertips, tracing the outline of the leaf. There are scuff marks and dents from overuse, and the blue fabric is starting to fray.
"You have not yet cut ties with Konoha," Itachi says. "I am relieved."
They sit together without saying anything, watching the fire and tossing a few dry branches into the flames.
Maybe because it was their similar temperaments - or at the very least, their similar sense of guilt - but of the three Taka members, Itachi grew closest to Jugo.
Suigetsu, of course, was disturbed. "...The hell? They're just sitting there, what the hell are they doing?"
Karin adjusted her glasses and peered outward, looking into the woods. Itachi and Jugo were sitting on a log, watching the seagulls by the water.
"They really like birds," Karin said. Suigetsu glared.
"Oi! I know they like birds, but doesn't anyone think it's a bit weird?" Suigetsu reared up, pointing. "He massacred his clan, and he has no impulse control! The fuck kind of pairing is that?"
"Maybe he reminds him of Kimimaro," Karin said. "He's a lot more calm than Sasuke, and he has better control of his eyes. Jugo probably feels safe with him."
"Tch."
They watched in the shadows as Jugo talked to the birds and Itachi watched the crows landing on the ground. Jugo caught Suigetsu's eye, and waved.
"It's just weird," Suigetsu said, again.
There's something about the Uchiha brothers, Karin muses. And slowly her mouth widens into a perverted smile.
In front of her is her first victim: Uchiha Itachi, sharpening his kunai and waiting in the dark. With her eyes, Karin mentally undresses him; she traces a line from the rounded muscles of his shoulders to the nape of his neck, then covers the contours of his face and the lashes of his eyes. Like Sasuke, Itachi's features are delicate, almost feminine, and with his pale skin and dark eyes, Karin thinks that he is beautiful.
Later that night, when Karin is touching herself in rude places and secretly fantasizing about doing more, she overhears Itachi hacking up a lung, and it just sounds so wet and so gross that Karin decides it's probably best to stick to Sasuke, for now.
When they were young, when Itachi was barely in his teens and Sasuke was just a child, Itachi would let his brother cuddle up against his side, baby soft and hiding his face against Itachi's chest. Those days, Itachi would press an absent hand against Sasuke's head and ruffle his hair, and tell stories about the things his father did at the police force, or old stories of shinobi warriors protecting the peace.
Somehow, they regress back to childhood again, Itachi sitting quietly by the fire and Sasuke resting his chin on Itachi's shoulder, and Itachi recounting quietly his days in the Akatsuki, how he spied on Madara and kept tabs on his brother, half a world away.
And as it had been when they were children, Sasuke falls asleep, resting his weight against Itachi's back and breathing softly. Itachi ruffles Sasuke's hair and smiles, because it's nice to be brothers again.
"Do you ever think about it?" Sasuke asked. "About what happened?" Itachi nodded, slowly.
"Every night," Itachi said. "Every time I close my eyes."
Itachi fell silent. Outside, the snow continued to fall, white clumps like cotton drifting in the air.
"I killed father and mother last," Itachi said, softly. He looked up at Sasuke with terrible eyes. "After I killed father, mother threw herself on his body, weeping. I had to shut my eyes before giving the final blow.
I wanted to kill myself," Itachi said. "I had planned to cut my throat the moment the last Uchiha was dead. But then I saw you."
"Nii-san," Sasuke said. Itachi closed his eyes, tears spilling over. They trickled down the scars on his face.
"I am a murderer, Sasuke." Itachi's eyes flicked upward. "I could have refused; I could have warned them. But then they would have retaliated and attacked the rest of the village. That is how I justified it to myself: sacrifice the few for the greater good. This is why I should have died by your hand."
"Nii-san, stop it," Sasuke said. He gripped Itachi's arm, pleading. "You wanted to make me strong, you wanted to make sure I was okay..."
"I wanted you to kill me, because I was too cowardly to do it myself," Itachi said. Sasuke bowed his head. "Sasuke. I cannot stay here," Itachi said. "I am a missing-nin; it is dangerous to stay with me. I am grateful for these last few moments, but now is the time I take my leave."
"What are you saying?" Sasuke said.
"You know what I am saying, little brother," Itachi said. Absently, he picked up the kunai, then dragged the dull edge across his skin. "I will find a quiet place," Itachi said, softly. "It will not be long."
The sky over the earth was darker now, and the air was thin and cold. Sasuke breathed, and could just see the plume of his breath arc upwards, drifting into the air like smoke. Somehow it reminded him of that night, and the time he saw Itachi's eyes.
"If you kill yourself, I will take it out on Konoha," Sasuke said, quietly. And for the first time, Itachi looked afraid.
"Sasuke," Itachi said, and Sasuke's jaw tightened, his hand making a fist.
"I won't."
Itachi was coughing again, and Sasuke scrambled beside him and tried his best to staunch his wounds, but while Sasuke could command massive amounts of chakra, the amount of control it took to heal a man was beyond Sasuke's understanding. Silently he cursed himself for not observing Kabuto better.
It wasn't until the second night, when Sasuke woke to the fit of Itachi's coughing, that Sasuke saw Itachi expertly healing himself. His palm was flat on his chest, and the soft glow of healing chakra pulsed beneath his palm.
"I learned so I could be useful," Itachi said. He smiled, sensing the question in Sasuke's eyes. "There were certain members of the Akatsuki who were in the habit of blowing themselves up, so to ingratiate myself, I trained as a medic-nin; they would be less likely to dispose of me otherwise."
Sasuke stifled a laugh. "Deidara?" Sasuke asked. Itachi's mouth quirked.
"The one and only," Itachi said, dryly.
Sasuke watched, awestruck as Itachi healed himself. There were nin who specialized in war and nin who specialized in healing, and the variegated ways of controlling chakra were beyond the scope of normal shinobi. Sasuke knew only the most basic of first aid, but Itachi's knowledge base rivaled that of the most seasoned of medics; Sasuke wondered to himself if there was anything his brother couldn't do.
"It is not so hard," Itachi said, and Sasuke realized he had been watching him. "I can teach you, if you like."
Itachi motioned for Sasuke to come closer, and he took Sasuke's hand and pressed it to his chest. "Use your sharingan," Itachi said, and Sasuke did, and he could see exactly how Itachi controlled the short pulse bursts of chakra, and how precisely he modulated it. Once again, Sasuke cursed himself that he didn't pay more attention to Kabuto, who was always healing one or more of Orochimaru's prisoners.
"Kimimaro had the same affliction," Sasuke said, and Itachi cocked his head. "Nii-san. I can't help but wonder if the cough you suffer from and how he died is related."
"It is doubtful," Itachi said. "Many things can make you cough up blood. Cancer of the lung, consumption. But I do not have any of these. If I did, I could be treated."
The chakra wave pulsed. Sasuke frowned. "Does it hurt?" Sasuke asked.
"Sometimes," Itachi said. "Sometimes I cannot catch my breath, and it is as if a hand is squeezing around my throat."
They fell quiet for a moment, Sasuke doing his best to heal while Itachi patiently guided him.
"The Fifth Hokage is a medic-nin," Sasuke said. He concentrated on his palm, on making the chakra stable. "Maybe she can help."
Itachi smiled to himself. It was another reason in Sasuke's mind not to destroy Konoha, and for that Itachi was grateful.
Sometimes, Sasuke watched his brother sleep.
It wasn't an every night occurrence; usually it would be on those nights Sasuke guarded the periphery, sitting awake and alone while everyone else was asleep. Those nights, he would make his perfunctory rounds, then check up on everyone else: Jugo. Suigetsu. Karin. Then when he was satisfied, he would take his perch by Itachi's side, and in the hours of his vigil, he would sit quietly, occasionally brushing away an errant strand of hair or feeling for the bird-of-passage beating of his heart.
These were his nightly rituals, the checking of his pulse, the feeling of his breath. The little things that proved Itachi was still alive.
Some nights, Sasuke watched his brother sleep - just to make sure he didn't die.
After the summit of the Five Kages, and after Madara's revelation, they come to find out Madara's plans: to turn the moon into a giant eye.
"He does not know you are alive," Sasuke says.
"Do not tell him," Itachi says. "We must let him think I am dead, and that you are still bent on destroying Konoha."
Sasuke vows to kill Danzo and kill Madara, then promises again to keep the Leaf safe (if only to appease his brother). And somewhere, miles away, a Konoha regent adds Sasuke's name to the bingo book.