Archive of Our Own

“All my holiday shopping is done except for you-know-who,” Gansey said, checking his tablet again with a worried sigh.

“We said no gifts, Gansey,” Adam said sternly.

“I know, and you are impossible to buy for anyway,” Gansey fretted. “I wish I knew what you needed, or rather, what you’d actually be willing to accept.”

Adam continued to give him his best no-nonsense glare. They’d only known each other the one semester, and while Adam had never thought about best friends forever, he kind of thought and hoped Gansey would be one.

“I can tell you what Adam really needs that he would never accept. But he should,” Henry said, leaning to read over Gansey’s shoulder.

“What’s that?” Adam said stiffly, thinking about how only Henry’s family’s wealth could begin to rival Gansey’s family’s wealth. He was probably talking about something they were born with—good breeding, luxury cars and houses, the ability to enjoy weird expensive foods—that someone like Adam could never hope to achieve.

“You need to get laid,” Henry said bluntly. Adam felt heat flare in his face and although Gansey’ cheeks pinked, he nodded gravely in agreement.

“Come on, that’s assuming a lot,” Adam argued.

“A lot of what?”

“That I don’t get laid on my own.”

“Do you?” Henry asked sweetly and Adam grimaced. If a couple fumbling makeouts after freshman parties didn’t count, then no, he didn’t. His second year at Harvard was already harder than his first year as he took more classes for his major. He didn’t want to waste his valuable time or money on fruitless dates and then feel guilty about considering it a waste if it didn’t end in an orgasm.

“Sex is good for controlling your stress levels and the release of oxytocin encourages a healthy immune system, better sleep and all around good health,” Gansey said thoughtfully.

“Are you offering?” Adam called his bluff and bit his tongue to keep from smiling when Gansey darkened to red.

“Not me, myself, I’m happily spoken for,” he said, leaning back into Henry who winked at Adam over his head. “But I’ve been thinking. I’d love to fix you up with—”

“Forget it. I’m not interested. I don’t have time for dating or meeting anyone else’s needs. I’m too busy with my own.”

“Then we’ll hire you an escort. Someone to give you a healthy dose of oxytocin without requiring any kind of commitment. No strings attached,” Henry said, already scrolling through his phone as though he had escort agencies listed in his contacts. Oh god, Adam thought, please don’t let him have escort agencies in his contacts.

“What kind of attributes do you like in a woman? Or a man?” Henry went on. “Hmm, which would you prefer for a no-strings night of mind-blowing sex? Oh, this could be the best Christmas present I’ve ever arranged.”

“No, that’s just no,” Adam said, standing and grabbing his coat and messenger bag.

“Come on, Adam. I can probably even get them to wear nothing but a fancy bow so you can unwrap—”

“Henry, I appreciate the thought, but no way in hell. Gansey, thanks for arranging our study time together. Good luck on your finals.”

“Adam, you don’t need to rush off,” Gansey said, but Adam was already at the front door. “Fine, but don’t forget my holiday party will be Thursday night. I know a lot of people will already be going home after finals, but I want to offer the opportunity for relaxing after—”

“Thursday, got it. I’ll be here,” and Adam hurried away before they could have any more appalling suggestions about his personal life.

Finals were every bit as tough as Adam feared, but he was finally done Thursday morning and hit his part-time job at the library with a lighter heart. Because finals were almost over, the library was nearly empty so he spent the afternoon doing busy work and chatting with co-workers who smuggled in eggnog and cookies to help get in the holiday spirit.

Adam never left town for the holidays, but he didn’t mind listening to everyone else’s plans.

His manager let him off an hour early, but Adam was too tired to care about losing one hour’s pay. It was snowing when he left the library, big flakes that were pretty but which could really do damage if they continued to pile up.

He was already through the door of his dorm, changing into comfy clothes and thinking lovingly of a nap, when he went to check his phone to see if Gansey sent any information about the party. His phone was nowhere in his bag or pockets, and he realized he left it in the library staff room. Well, he wasn’t about to walk across campus again. His manager would see it and lock it up; he could live without it for a night until his shift the next day.

Then he crashed face first onto his bed in the quiet dorm and fell asleep.

The pounding on his door jerked him awake. At first Adam had no idea where he was and then no idea when it was. It was dark in the room but he didn’t know if it was still Thursday or if he’d slept through until the next morning or, for all he knew, until January when classes started again.

The knocking began again, and he groaned as he crawled off the bed and shambled to the door. He pulled it open to the most gorgeous person he’d ever seen in real life. The man was tall, broad-shouldered, with just enough dark hair on his head to prove it was black, and the lightest blue eyes Adam had ever seen, framed by thick black eyelashes that were stark against his fair skin.

Adam had to take another breath, but no words came to him.

The guy looked at him, supremely unimpressed or disgusted or some strong emotion on his face. “You Adam?” he asked finally.

Adam could only grunt. His eyes fell again and this time took in the details his libido missed the first time. Big black boots, skinny black jeans, thin waist, soft-looking knit shirt under a black leather jacket. There was a dusting of melting snow on his shoulders.

Adam wanted to climb him like he was a banana tree and Adam was a hungry monkey.

When he got back to the guy’s eyes, he had one dark eyebrow arched mockingly.

“I’m Adam,” Adam finally croaked.

The guy nodded like he knew it all along. “Gansey sent me.”

“Gansey sent you?” and suddenly it hit Adam like a brick. “Gansey sent you.” It struck him in a flash: their last conversation about Christmas gifts, Henry’s suggestion of an escort, the absolutely gorgeous epitome of male beauty that stood before him.

Adam had never been religious but he wouldn’t have been surprised to hear a choir of angels when the revelation hit him. He was going to owe Gansey and Henry more than he could ever repay.

“Come in,” his mouth decided without ever getting his brain involved.

The guy walked in, looked around the tiny room and just stood there. Adam shut the door and banged his forehead off it, only once, quietly, to make sure he was actually awake. It hurt, so he must be. Then he realized he was in the holey sweatpants and slouchy sweatshirt he’d changed into for the nap and he was in no way prepared to play host to a man like this.

The guy must have thought so too because his judgmental eyebrow returned and he said, “You ready?”

“No, no I’m not,” Adam said, quite honestly. “Just give me a minute.”

He actually didn’t know what to do next, but he did have to pee so he grabbed his shower things and blurted out, “Make yourself at home. I’ll be quick,” before escaping to the shower room down the hall.

He took the world’s fastest shower, brushed his teeth to get the gross nap fuzziness off, and slapped on as much deodorant as he could. Then he realized he’d forgotten clothes so he put the sweats back on to return to his room.

The guy was sitting on the edge of his bed, thumbing through his phone. He looked up when Adam returned but just made brief eye contact with his bare chest and went back to his phone.

Adam still hadn’t figured out what he was supposed to do or what he should say, but he knew what he’d surely like to do. So he padded over to the guy and asked, “What’s your name?”

“Ronan,” the icy blue eyes looked up at Adam again and this time their eyes locked.

“That’s a really nice name,” Adam said.

Ronan snorted loudly. Adam figured this guy wasn’t being paid for his conversational skills which was good because it seemed like he had even less talent for small talk than Adam. That sent a wave of heat up Adam’s spine because what was he being paid for if not conversation then what the hell, maybe Henry and Gansey were right, maybe Adam did deserve something nice for once.

Ronan was still looking up at him, and it didn’t seem like he was going to make the first move. Should Adam? Were they supposed to talk about things? Discuss rules and boundaries? Adam didn’t think he could bring it up; he was already supremely embarrassed by the entire situation, so he made just one decision.

He sat down on Ronan’s lap, straddling him, and Ronan’s entire body froze. Adam couldn’t even feel him breathe. Was that wrong then? Did Adam just break some cardinal rule about hooking up with an escort?

Then he looked down and didn’t care anymore. His face was just above Ronan’s like that, the height difference canceled out, and he could feel when Ronan finally did take a shuddering breath.

Adam brought his hands up, cupped Ronan’s face, and kissed him.

Adam wasn’t sure what he was expecting, but the lack of participation wasn’t it. Then he frantically remembered a movie he saw a clip of one day, an old Julia Roberts movie, and wasn’t there something about not kissing on the mouth when she was working?

But Adam was already moving his lips over Ronan’s closed, chapped ones and he just had to suck Ronan’s fuller bottom lip for an instant. Ronan shivered. It encouraged Adam, so he carefully tilted Ronan’s face just a little so Adam could kiss him again, trying to tease his mouth open.

When Adam licked out, just the point of his tongue against the crease of Ronan’s mouth, Ronan suddenly gasped and his big hands came up to clamp onto Adam’s hips. Adam grinned into the kiss but took the opportunity to teasingly lick into Ronan’s mouth, daring his tongue to come out and play.

Ronan leaned his head a little more into Adam’s grasp but the rest of his body stiffened. Adam relaxed his other hand to wander down to Ronan’s broad shoulder and squeeze it, but it only made Ronan’s muscles seize harder.

But Ronan was keeping his mouth open as Adam explored it, and when he finally did flick his tongue against Adam’s, Adam moaned in encouragement, rocking his hips down against Ronan. He was starting to get a little hard already, but he wanted Ronan to know that he was doing this to him, that just his kiss was already turning on Adam so much. He figured Ronan would want the positive feedback for his professional ego.

But Ronan’s tongue faltered and his mouth closed. As he turned his face away, Adam had access to his cheek to follow it with his lips then over to his jaw then his ear and when he pressed a kiss in the soft hollow beneath it, Ronan hissed so Adam gently bit it then licked away the pain.

Ronan pressed up against him then, just once so Adam could feel his cock was hardening too.

Then he was falling to his ass on the floor because Ronan had just stood up and was glaring down at him.

“What the actual fuck,” Ronan said as Adam exclaimed “What the hell” and they were left staring at each other.

“Gansey said you were a nice guy but do you always greet his friends like this?” Ronan gestured wildly.

“His friends?” Adam was lost and confused and he didn’t like being at a disadvantage so he scrambled to his feet. “Who the hell are you?”

“I told you. Gansey sent me,” Ronan repeated then deigned to explain. “I’m supposed to drive you to the party because he didn’t want you biking through the snow.”

“Oh,” was all Adam could say and he shivered, suddenly freezing cold in the room without a shirt on and with all the blood flow now dispersing rapidly from his groin. If there had been enough blood left in his upper half, he knew he’d be bright red. “You’re Gansey’s friend.”

“Yeah.” Ronan was still looking at him oddly and Adam wanted to find a rock to crawl under. “We went to boarding school together.”

Adam shut his eyes in mortification. “Lynch. Of course. Yeah, he talks about you a lot.”

Ronan snorted. “He talks about you a lot but he never mentioned just how friendly you get. You really that happy to meet me?”

“I’m so sorry. I can’t even… what can I even say. I’m sorry. I was asleep and I … I’m really sorry I jumped you like that. I wasn’t myself.” Adam had no idea what to say other than apologies.

“Gansey texted you to tell you I was coming,” Ronan huffed.

“My phone’s in the library. I didn’t see any messages.”

Ronan ran his hand over his face and then his head. “Why don’t I just wait in the hall while you get ready for the party.”

“I don’t think I’m going to Gansey’s tonight.” Adam was positive he couldn’t handle the humiliation after what he’d just done.

“No, you’re going,” Ronan said sternly. “If I have to sit through a night sneaking piss beer with Henry Cheng while Gansey goes on and on about his ‘studies’ you have to suffer too.”

“I just…” Adam buried the heels of his hands into his eyes. “I understand if you don’t want to be around me after I basically just assaulted you.”

Ronan didn’t reply so Adam finally dropped his hands to see Ronan just standing there, looking at him. “If you think that was assault, then you’re obviously not doing it right. Just get dressed and let’s get to Gansey’s before he sends out a dog sled team to search for us.”

Adam snorted a little laugh but turned away so Ronan wouldn’t see his face. He heard his door shut and grabbed his pillow, screaming into it as quietly as he could without shredding his voice. Then he calmly put on jeans and a sweater, boots and winter coat, and tucked gloves and a hat into his pockets.

If Ronan wanted to pretend that nothing happened, then Adam could do that. He would do that. And he would never think again about those lips against his, those shoulders under his hands, that dick next to his.

Adam thought he was mostly back to himself when he stepped into the hall, but Ronan turned quickly and said, “I left my phone. On your bed, when you...um.”

Adam’s face definitely blushed that time but he went back inside and grabbed Ronan’s phone, shoving it at him as he aimed for the stairs. They were quiet on the short walk to the car—a BMW, okay, Adam should’ve figured Ronan was money like Gansey—and quiet on the drive despite the pounding noise of Ronan’s music on the stereo.

When Ronan parked around the block from Gansey’s townhouse, Adam took a deep, steadying breath. “I just have to say again how very sorry I am for taking advantage of you and forcing myself on you like that. And I will understand if you need to tell Gansey about my … reprehensible behavior.”

Ronan jerked the parking brake up with vigor. “Why the fuck would I tell Gansey anything about it? It’s fucking Cheng who’d want a play-by-play and he’s sure as hell not getting it.”

“Well, thank you,” was all Adam could say. Then they were walking to Gansey’s door and Gansey was taking his coat with great courtesy while chiding Ronan for not answering his texts and worrying him so greatly.

Ronan flipped him off and headed right for the table of drinks. Adam looked around at the crowd of students and staff members he hadn’t expected to see.

“There aren’t nearly as many people as I planned,” Gansey said in a low voice. “I’m afraid that when most people saw the forecast they headed out as soon as their last exam was finished. But there’s enough of us and plenty of food and drinks. The punch and drinks in the living room are alcohol-free. Henry is keeping all the alcohol in the kitchen, since we are technically still underage.”

Adam couldn’t even think of something conciliatory to say and Gansey looked suddenly concerned. “Are you all right, Parrish?”

“Yeah, I just... I don’t think your friend likes me very much.”

Gansey looked resigned. “Well that’s Ronan for you. Oh, I do hope he wasn’t outright rude to you. I warned him that you are a special friend, but sometimes that only is incentive for him to be even nastier.”

“No, no it wasn’t him. He wasn’t rude. I’m just afraid that I may have offended him.”

Gansey’s eyebrow raised and his eyes widened. “I don’t know how that’s possible unless you’re his brother. Ronan angers easily and quickly but he seemed quite happy when you walked in. I’m sure you’re just being sensitive. Now what can I get you to drink?”

“Everything,” Adam sighed and Gansey clapped an understanding hand to his back.

Adam circled the room a little, nodding at people he had classes with, meeting their dates or roommates. He sipped at drinks that Gansey or Henry placed in his hand. He tried some of the catered foods that Gansey pointed out. He floated around with his back purposefully to the center of the room so he wouldn’t see where Ronan sat in the center of the couch, splayed out intentionally so that no one could sit beside him.

Adam was just wishing happy holidays to a TA from his speech class when he turned and saw Gansey swat at Ronan’s knee and say something in a low voice. Ronan snarled back, but Gansey seemed completely unfazed by the reaction.

Then Ronan’s eyes met Adam’s and his eyes fell, expression falling off his face too. Gansey followed his line of sight and raised that damn eyebrow at Adam. Adam tried to drown himself in the red Solo cup.

His talk with the TA was disrupted when Gansey swept in and said he simply must borrow Adam for a moment, had she tried the cocktail shrimp? and the TA was charmed while Gansey all but frog marched Adam into the kitchen.

“What is going on with Ronan and you?” he demanded.

Adam sighed and didn’t pretend he didn’t know what Gansey was talking about. “I told you, I offended Ronan pretty bad.”

“He doesn’t seem offended so much as… hmm,” Gansey rubbed at his bottom lip like he always did when he was in deep thought. Then he cheered up when Henry entered the kitchen. “Have you talked to Ronan tonight?”

Henry shivered dramatically. “I was hoping to postpone that delight until after the other guests have left. I don’t want any of them to swoon from the blue language that will accompany that conversation.”

“Go talk to him for just a minute and then come back,” Gansey waved at him like he was shooing a goose. Henry squawked like one but obeyed.

It was probably only sixty seconds before Henry hurried back in, his eyebrows raised nearly to his hair. “He was almost civil to me. What’s gotten into our Mr. Lynch?”

“It seems our Adam has,” Gansey replied and Adam had to lay his head on the kitchen island and groan.

“What?” Gansey and Henry asked in unison.

“Nothing, just leave me here and go.”

“What exactly happened when Ronan went to pick you up? You must have said or done something that made a big impression on him,” Gansey said. “I haven’t seen him this bowed, this...”

“Broken?” Henry offered.

“Oh my god, I broke him,” Adam moaned.

“Not broken as in damaged; broken as in tamed.” Gansey suddenly clutched his chest then reached out with his other hand and grabbed Henry’s. “Oh, do you think it’s working? Before we even officially started it?”

“Our big plan? Are we so good that our plans take effect before we even put them into motion?” Henry clutched him back in glee.

“Tell us, Adam, everything that happened,” Gansey commanded.

“No.”

Gansey reared back a little. “What do you mean, no?”

“Exactly that—no.”

“We’ll ask Ronan,” Henry announced but Adam grabbed his arm before he could take more than a step.

“Can we wait to talk about this until after the party? I really fucked up.”

Gansey and Henry looked at each other and finally nodded. “That might be best,” Gansey admitted. “In the meantime, take this beer and go talk to Ronan. We can’t have him scaring off the other guests with the way he’s watching you.”

“I thought you said he wasn’t scary like this.”

“It’s all relative,” Henry said. “He can be pretty damn scary.”

Adam dragged his feet following them into the living room, but he made it to the couch and held out the beer like a peace offering. Ronan glanced up and accepted it. Adam motioned toward the couch and Ronan nodded but he didn’t move so Adam sat down squeezed between Ronan’s hard body and the hard end of the couch.

They didn’t talk. There wasn’t much left to say after a guy greets you, a total stranger, with his tongue down your throat, Adam mused.

Then Ronan made a noise and Adam looked up from where he was pulling a thread loose on Gansey’s couch cushion. Ronan caught his eye and gestured with disgust toward Henry who was trying to sneak up on Gansey. Since Henry was theatrically tip-toeing and putting a finger to his lips to shush anyone looking, it wasn’t very subtle.

“What’s he got in his hand?” Adam wondered aloud.

“Probably fucking mistletoe,” Ronan mocked, then as Adam watched, his cheek and ear started to turn pink. Adam wondered if he was remembering the same thing that Adam definitely was.

Sure enough, Ronan had predicted it and Henry triumphantly stopped behind Gansey, holding the tiny sprig over Gansey’s head then tapped his shoulder. Gansey had somehow remained oblivious the entire time, speaking animatedly to the couple in front of him, so he jumped a little when Henry touched him.

Gansey turned and smiled at his boyfriend then Henry looked up and Gansey smiled a different smile. He met Henry halfway for a kiss, to the laughs and cheers of their guests.

Then Henry dropped his arm and swept Gansey back into a dip and a longer kiss to the hoots of their friends and nervous titters of those who knew them less well.

When Gansey had been put back on his feet and left to straighten his hair, Henry licked his lips and looked around the room, gesturing with the mistletoe. “I can guarantee it works. Who wants to try next?”

The guests laughed, most turned away, and Henry looked right at Adam and Ronan and raised his eyebrow—dammit how could all of Adam’s friends do that ridiculous move and he still couldn’t? Henry held out the mistletoe, took a step forward, and Adam was off the couch, all but diving to the left, while he noticed Ronan was a scurry of movement, jumping up and not quite running to the right.

Henry looked disappointed but didn’t pursue either one of them.

Adam couldn’t remember if Gansey’s party invitation had a question mark or a time marked as the ending, but by ten p.m. people were making their goodbyes and starting to leave. There were comments about more snow and then suddenly everyone was taking their coats, wishing happy holidays to Gansey and Henry and clearing out.

Adam found himself at the kitchen island sitting on a stool alone until Gansey came in with a sigh. “That’s all of them gone then,” he said and took the stool beside Adam.

“Great party,” Adam said politely.

“Was it, though? I should have ordered more holiday treats rather than standard catered fare. Henry, next time, we must make sure to include some more traditional cookies and things.”

Henry pressed a kiss to his temple and leaned against the other side of the island. “I don’t think anyone missed them.”

“Yes, but I wish I’d at least gotten gingerbread men for Ronan. I know he loves them.”

“He does love spicy men,” Henry murmured and Adam winced. Nope, it’d been hours and he still was just as horrified by what he’d done.

“Will you stay here tonight, Adam? The roads were plowed but there’s still quite a lot of snow,” Gansey said.

“No, I need to get back to my dorm.”

“We would love to have you,” Gansey insisted. “We’re going to put off the clean-up and go up to our room and watch Christmas movies. Come relax with us.”

“Just us, Lynch, and all the booze that’s left,” Henry tempted.

Adam grimaced. “No, thanks. I’m going to head back.”

“I wish you’d come spend break with us in D.C. We’d take you to all the sites,” Gansey said. “Ronan is staying here until we leave so we can all go together on Sunday.”

“No thank you,” Adam said for at least the tenth time. “It was kind of you to invite me for Christmas, and I’ll take the train down, but I’m not staying all of break with you guys. And your family.”

“At least Christmas to New Years?” Gansey tried again but Adam only sighed.

“Ronan will be there,” Henry said, like that was a major temptation rather than enough reason to just burrow into a little hole until classes resumed in January.

They must have read something on his face because Gansey placed his hand gently on Adam’s arm, like he was a skittish animal, before saying “Will you tell us now what happened between the two of you that has you so upset?”

“I don’t really want to talk about Ronan,” Adam said honestly.

“But we do,” Henry said. “We had a plan. A wonderfully awesome plan, and neither of you are cooperating.”

“Oh really.”

“Yes,” Henry insisted. “We sent Ronan to pick you up, and you were to fall in love with each other at first sight. He would whisk you back here, stay by your side adoringly all night, and by the time the party was over, you wouldn’t need the mistletoe. Then you’d leave your boot here and he would search the city over looking for the beautiful boy it fit—oh wait, I seem to have mixed up my stories.”

“They’re both fairy tales, that’s for sure,” Adam’s face was steaming hot and he covered it with both hands. “You really thought that you’d fix me up with him.”

Gansey and Henry exchanged looks—Gansey’s guilty, Henry’s innocent as newly fallen snow.

“We just care about you both so much, Adam. And we thought you had a lot in common. It would make us happy to see our best friends happy together,” Gansey explained.

“I can’t believe someone like him is single,” Adam said.

“It’s his personality. You may have noticed he’s an asshole,” Henry said then grabbed Gansey’s hand when it batted at him.

“Well, he’s mostly single by choice,” Gansey said instead. “Ronan feels things very deeply. He doesn’t do casual relationships.”

Adam suddenly had a terrible, sinking feeling right in the pit of his stomach. “But he’s had a girlfriend or a boyfriend before, right?”

Gansey solemnly answered, “No, he’s never had a boyfriend. He’s always said he’s waiting until he finds the right guy.”

“But, I mean, he’s kissed someone, surely,” Adam laughed hollowly. “Looking like that, he had to have hooked up.”

“Nope,” Henry said. “As of August, when we were playing Truth or Dare, he took every forfeit rather than tell us or kiss us. And who in their right mind could resist us?”

“I’m going to hell,” Adam said. “I did something so horrible, I’m going to hell, and I don’t even believe in hell.”

The door closed behind Ronan as he swaggered into the kitchen and took the stool on the end farthest from Adam. “What’d you do now?”

Adam shut his eyes because the admission was going to cost him his best friend and his best friend’s boyfriend. “I sexually assaulted Ronan tonight under the mistaken belief that he was someone else. I am so sorry.”

He opened his eyes to see looks of shock (Gansey), awe (Henry), and eye-rolling (Ronan).

“What did you do?” Gansey whispered.

“I thought he was somebody you sent. You remember what we talked about last week… what Henry threatened to get me for a Christmas gift…” Adam trailed off, not wanting to say it out loud.

“Oh!” Henry remembered. “You mean you thought he was an es—”

“Yes! That,” Adam hurried to interrupt before Ronan could catch on. “I was asleep and he woke me and said Gansey sent him and I just... got confused. I sat on his lap and kissed him. I’m so sorry I stole your first kiss, without consent.” He said that directly to Ronan, but he couldn’t look him in the eyes. He couldn’t bear to look at any of them.

Ronan broke the silence with a loud and ugly snort. “Well it’s a story I won’t be telling anyone else, that’s for sure.”

Meanwhile Henry was fanning himself. “An escort? Really Adam, would we send you someone dressed like that for your Christmas present?”

Adam’s face gave away his thoughts and Henry’s grin grew while Gansey looked embarrassed. “Well then. That’s something undoubtedly interesting we learned about you tonight.”

“An escort?” Ronan said flatly. “You thought I was a motherfucking escort?”

“Well, why not?” Henry said. “You should be flattered that someone finds you irresistibly good looking enough to pay to spend time with you. I wonder what you’d be worth on the open market?”

Ronan gave him A Look and snarled, “More than even you could ever afford, Cheng.”

Adam slid his stool back and started to rise. “I think I just need to go and never see any of you ever again.”

Gansey stopped him with a strong hand on his arm. “No, Adam, you are my dear friend—our dear friend—so we are going to help you sort this out and get past this certainly less than ideal situation, but surely—”

“Nope, this has been fucked up enough, all of you sitting around, talking about me. Let’s go, Adam,” Ronan stood and started toward the kitchen door.

Adam felt all the blood drain out of his face into his stomach. “Where are we going?”

Ronan raised his eyebrow and glared as if he weren’t threatening enough. “I heard you say that you don’t want to crash here so I’ll take you back to your dorm.” Ronan’s eyes flickered down to where Adam’s hand was clutching his own sweater. “And don’t worry, your virtue is safe with me.”

At that, Ronan stalked out of the kitchen.

“Well, my goodness,” Gansey finally said.

“I think that was him flirting with you. At least, as close as you’re going to get,” Henry said.

“Oh my god, am I going to end up dead in a ditch? Is this part of his plan for getting revenge?” Adam asked.

Henry and Gansey appeared to consider the question very seriously which was not good for Adam’s already strung-out nerves.

“I don’t think so,” Gansey said slowly. “I’m prone to agree with Henry. That very well might have been Ronan flirting. If he was looking to get revenge for anything that you might have done that he didn’t like, he wouldn’t announce it.”

Adam stood on shaky legs. “If you don’t hear from me by noon tomorrow, destroy the hard drive on my computer before you call the police.”

Gansey nodded solemnly. Henry bussed a kiss to Adam’s cheek. “You sure you don’t want the mistletoe, to lighten the mood?” he asked.

Adam groaned then he got into his coat, hat and gloves and slogged through the snow to Ronan’s car. He already had it scraped clean of snow so Adam just slid into the passenger’s side in silence.

Ronan poked the stereo until the loud music began to blare again, but Adam didn’t complain. Ronan even drove him right to the door of his dorm since there was no one around, but when Adam went to get out, Ronan turned off the engine and exited too.

Adam walked carefully to the front door, Ronan trailing a step behind him. When Adam turned to face him, Ronan stopped.

“Thanks for bringing me back,” Adam said. “Have a nice night.”

Ronan nodded and shoved his hands into his jacket pockets. “Heard you were coming down to D.C. for the break.”

“I agreed to go down for Christmas day.”

“With the Gansey family?” Ronan shuddered and it had nothing to do with the snow.

“I know,” Adam said morosely. “But Gansey won’t take no for an answer.”

“I’ll be around D.C. until New Year’s. At my brother’s.”

“That’s nice,” Adam said, feeling like he wasn’t quite keeping up with the conversation because Ronan was giving him a piercing look.

“Maybe I can see you again,” Ronan finally spelled out and Adam said “Oh.”

“You don’t even have to pay me,” Ronan said, and Adam tensed before he figured out it was a joke.

“I don’t think I could afford you, if you were a professional,” Adam tried to joke back.

Ronan shrugged. “Maybe I’d give you a repeat customer discount.”

“Like a frequent shopper club?”

“I could get you a membership card,” Ronan stepped closer, but Adam had to get one thing clear.

“Ronan, was that really your first kiss? I’m so sorry it happened like that.” Adam’s first kiss certainly hadn’t been that great: a girl from school who fleetingly showed interest his junior year and they’d met up under the bleaches at a football game because he had no money to waste on a date. He’d kissed her but then she actually laughed while he was kissing her and afterward scrunched up her nose and wiped her mouth, so he ghosted her and they never talked again.

“Why is everyone so caught up in that?” Ronan said in a very disgruntled voice. “Yeah, okay it was my first kiss, and if you really have to know, it was fucking incredible. Way better than I would’ve thought.”

Ronan’s cheeks were red, and Adam was sure it was from more than the cold. Adam took off his right glove and held up his hand to Ronan’s cheek. Ronan leaned into it.

“We could always try again,” Adam said quietly.

“You wanna give it another go?” Ronan stepped even closer.

“Yeah,” and Adam kissed him carefully, pressing his lips gently to Ronan’s until Ronan jerked his head back.

“What happened to how you kissed me last time? Do you save that up for escorts only?”

“It wasn’t too much?”

Ronan shook his head and put his hands gingerly on Adam’s waist, pulling him close until they were breathing the same air. Adam leaned into him and kissed, opening his mouth, a whimper escaping him when Ronan’s lips parted immediately.

When they broke apart this time, both were breathing heavily and Adam couldn’t stop touching Ronan’s face, his shoulder, his arm, his back.

Ronan seemed to realize he had permission to touch as well, so he did, feeling Adam’s back and sides before hugging him tightly.

“I’d invite you in,” Adam said, trying to catch his breath.

“I’d come.” Then Ronan snorted at his own comment.

“That’s generally the idea,” Adam teased.

Ronan’s body shivered beneath his hands before he pulled away. “I’d better go back to Gansey’s.”

“OK. I’ll be at the library all day tomorrow, if you want…” Adam trailed off before he could put it all out there.

“I do want,” Ronan said firmly. “Lunch?”

“12:30.” Ronan nodded resolutely then grabbed Adam’s left hand. He peeled the glove off so he could raise the hand to his lips and press a kiss to Adam’s palm. Adam suddenly found it very hard to breathe again. “See you later,” Ronan said.

“Yeah.”

“But lunch is gonna cost you extra. You better call my pimp and work it out,” Ronan said as he backed away.

“Tell Gansey I’ll talk to him later.”

Ronan’s bark of laughter and middle finger accompanied him, but Adam couldn’t stop smiling as he entered his building after watching Ronan drive away.

He’d never tell Gansey, or God forbid Henry, but they might just have given him the greatest Christmas gift ever.