Work Text:
Kyle woke up with a full body shudder, his breathing galloping and his heart about to hammer off his chest.
His first instinct was to look to the side, still in that post-dream haze where you’re not sure what you dreamt of was real or not.
There was a figure next to him, a big figure. So big that the silhouette of the blanket covering the body appeared like a little hill.
Kyle let out a sigh of relief and it felt as if his soul had been on the brink of leaving him for a moment there. Calmer, he wrapped an arm around his man and closed his eyes again.
The next time he opened them, the bed was empty and so was the rest of his room. The light came in from the window and there was a knot in his stomach.
“Eric?” Kyle called the name like it was escaping from his lips. “Eric?!” He repeated it, more nervous.
A head of disheveled hair popped out of the bathroom door. “Washin’ m’teeth.” His husband said with a mouth full before disappearing again. He spat on the sink. “Are you okay?”
The gentleness in the tone made Kyle feel embarrassed. What day was it again? Sunday?
“I…had a nightmare.” He admitted as he sat up.
“Oh?” Rather than concerned, Cartman sounded intrigued, which was very much like him.
“Can you come here?” Kyle requested after a while.
“But we need to make breakfast for-”
“Please?” Kyle could hardly hide the need in his voice.
He could imagine his husband sighing. “Fine.” After rinsing and closing the sink, Cartman appeared through the door, one eyebrow raised.
Tapping the spot in front of him in the bed, Kyle signaled for the man to sit down. The brunette did with a confused expression.
“Closer.” Kyle demanded and the other complied, shortening the space between them. “Closer.” He asked again.
“Kyle…” Cartman appeared a tiny bit exasperated.
“Closer!” He insisted all the same.
With a bounce, Cartman dragged himself towards Kyle until their legs were entangled with each other’s. Ah, that was better.
Kyle stretched his arms to cup the full cheeks within his reach. He squeezed them like slime and watched the fatty wince over it.
“What’s gotten into you?” Cartman seemed confused.
“You had a family. You had another family.” Kyle tried to keep his voice steady even though he had just awakened. “You…” He inhaled sharply. “...didn’t want me.” Saying the words felt surreal. “You wanted to get rid of me.”
Cartman cracked a grin. “What a childhood throwback.” The man was chuckling until he saw Kyle wasn’t amused. He lowered his shoulders. “Honey…”
“It’s not funny.” Kyle pursed his lips. “It wasn’t funny at all.” He let his hands fall, trying to chase the memory away.
Without a word, Cartman gestured towards himself and Kyle was on his lap in a matter of seconds, desperate for the intimacy. It had been so long since they were together that he had almost forgotten the way to get there had been just as long.
A couple of decades after their group split up, Kyle met his childhood rival at a synagogue in Denver. Shockingly, Cartman had converted to Judaism and even became a rabbi. Kyle was very skeptical about the transformation yet one thing led to another and they ended up going for some drinks. Neither of them admitted it at first, but they had clearly missed each other so they agreed to stay in touch.
The more time they spent together, the more Kyle realized how much Cartman had genuinely changed. From being that hateful little child he was, to a more tolerant and kind man. That moved Kyle, even if a tiny part of him wished he had been part of that transformation. He was glad to see his friend had managed to become a better person. And…he wanted to stay around to see where Cartman would go. He wanted to stay with Cartman.
Understanding his own feelings made acting on them easier and it wasn’t before long that he dared to kiss the man he had been in love with his entire life. Amazingly enough, Cartman had felt the same and only didn’t do anything about it out of fear of rejection. Unbelievable! They were both such idiots!
From then on, well, it wasn’t all smooth sailing, though Kyle could definitely affirm it was the best decision of his life. They had been married for 15 years now, more in love than Kyle ever thought it was possible for anyone to be.
“What are you thinking about?” Cartman asked. They were staring into each other’s eyes so deeply that, if they weren’t used to each other, it’d be intimidating.
Kyle whispered. “Everything.” He tilted his head a little to give his spouse a kiss. His lips tasted like spearmint and it was kind of disgusting. At the moment though, Kyle wasn’t bothered.
After a series of long pecks, the redhead parted his own lips and waited for the other to do the same. It’s not like he was particularly aroused, he just yearned to feel Cartman’s skin against his, to run his fingers through those fine strands of hair, to touch him. He wasn’t one to be that affected by nightmares but this one really got to him. Kyle didn’t want to let him go.
On the other hand, his husband seemed to be thinking the opposite as he pulled away with a giggle.
“What?” Kyle frowned, annoyed by the interruption.
Cartman was beaming harder than the sun burning the side of Kyle’s face. “Your beard tickles.”
“Well, I can’t do anything about that can I?” Kyle grumbled though he wasn’t really mad. He just wanted to kiss his husband again so he did.
Deeply and slowly, Kyle took his time smooching his beloved, revisiting Cartman’s mouth for what was probably the millionth time in their relationship. Caressing the velvety tongue with his, tenderly sucking the voluptuous lips he loved so much, getting drunk on Cartman’s soft sighs of pleasure…He was real, he was real, he was real…
When they broke it off, Kyle rested his chin on Cartman's shoulder and exhaled heavily. Cartman was here, with him.
“Um, wow...” His partner commented with amusement. “In a mood so early, huh?”
Kyle could feel Cartman’s heartbeat against his chest. It was steady and soothing and it made him cling to the brunette tighter.
“Babe?”
For some reason, hearing Cartman call him like that…Kyle couldn’t help letting out a sob. That’s right, they were…
“Kyle?” Any joy gone from his tone, Cartman was genuinely worried now.
“It was so real.” Kyle murmured, his eyes getting wet. “Just like you are right now. It felt so real.” He closed his eyelids, his body shaking with his words. “It was so real…”
Surrounding Kyle’s torso with his arms, Cartman placed his head in the crook of Kyle’s neck. His plump nature was comforting in itself. “But it’s not. I’m right here with you.”
“Your wife’s name was Yentl…” Kyle started recalling the details.
“Yentl?” Cartman’s voice echoed on the ginger’s back. “Like the Barbra Streisand movie? Kyle, please!”
“But it’s true!” Kyle exclaimed and his husband stopped laughing. “And your children’s names were-”
“Kyle, Kyle!” Cartman pulled back and his wide hands held Kyle’s face gently. “It was just a stupid dream so don’t get hung up over it. I’m here and I’m your husband.” His minty breath was invading Kyle’s nostrils.
“And what if it’s true?!” Kyle countered. “What if that’s what happened in another life! We used to fight a lot, remember? It’s not that weird-” His sentence was interrupted by a familiar pair of lips being placed on top of his.
“You’re here with me.” Cartman purred as he pressed their noses together. “Remember? My little monster.”
Sniffling a little, Kyle wiped his nose. “Do you want me to shave my beard so you can pretend you’re kissing a woman?” He mumbled like a pathetic child.
“What?” The other snorted. “Kyle, I have two children with you. Why would I want to be with a woman?”
Avoiding his lover’s stare, Kyle shrugged. “You seemed really happy with Yentl.”
“Who’s Yentl?!” Cartman yelled with desperation and Kyle chuckled before drawing him into another kiss.
Swiftly, he pinned the man down as their petting got heavier. Cartman’s hands slid down the hem of Kyle’s pants, threatening to take them off. Kyle was amidst unbuttoning the other’s shirt when the door was slammed open, making them jolt.
“Dads- oh, ew!” A boy’s voice screamed in disgust. “Are you guys trying to make new babies?”
Cartman chortled as Kyle rolled off him. “Ezra, I’ve already told you that’s not how it works.
The chubby kid with curly brown hair grimaced at his parents from the doorframe. “Uh-uh”. He vocalized with skepticism.
His sister, taller and older, covered his eyes. “At least lock the door while you’re at it!” She scowled, a messy red mane adorning her face.
“Sorry about that, kids…” Kyle felt his face heat up.
“Ha! He’s embarrassed!” Ezra pointed at his dad, snickering. Suddenly, his stomach rumbled. “Wait, that’s right! We came ‘cause we’re starving!”
“Yeah!” Leah backed him up.
Cartman was conciliating. “Your dad was a little tired today so I’ll go pick some Denny’s for you, how’s that sound?”
“Yay! Denny’s!” The children cheered and got on the bed enthusiastically.
“I want the Cookie Dough Pancake!” Ezra yelled while jumping.
“And I want the Vanilla Crepe!” Leah retorted, jumping just as hard.
“Hey, hey! Be careful!” Kyle tried to make them stop but the kids were simply too overjoyed by the prospect of junk food for breakfast. He glanced at Cartman for help only to find him smiling at him. They both broke into laughter.
Thank God that thing had been just a dream.
Thank God.