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Hope.
Hope was the feeling Ladybug felt when she looked at her partner's eyes as the rain fell down on their bodies.
Her partner, who she tried so much to push away, that she had looked over and stepped over ,ever since she became guardian.
Her partner, who was here for her even though she had just lost everything.
Chat Noir is here to pick up the pieces . Her pieces.
When he gave her his hand it was like he pulled her from the water she was drowning in.
Never in her life has she felt more humiliated, lost, defeated … the list goes on and on in her head . The thoughts and the self doubt that she has to give up, keep spinning in her head making her dizzy. The waves of sobs escape her body and make her tremble. She feels her throat closing , and her breaths getting quicker as she tries to get enough air. And yet here he is . Standing tall beside her, giving her his strong hand like a rock that she can lean into.
She feels her body crushing into his and she feels safe again.
He promises her that they will get them back one by one. How does he trust her so much ? After everything she has done?
Chat Noir is the only person that pulls her out of the darkness she has spiraled in. And she hears him say all these words , speaking so great about her , praising her in ways that she doesn’t deserve…
And then- It’s not just Chat Noir she hears whispering in her ear. She hears all of Paris above them ,chanting her name. Their names over and over.
The feeling of hope ,keeps coming pushing away the darkness she feels inside.
They stand there, letting the water falling from the sky wash away the events of the day.
She reaches for his hand, and she immediately feels his fingers wrap around hers. She doesn’t ever want to let go.
Why, why? did she ever let herself think that she was capable of doing this without him?
In the rainstorm around them and the storm in her heart, Chat Noir is her anchor.
The people stay there despite the rain, claiming their stance against Hawkmoth’s terror. Because hope, love and solidarity win against all evil.
Ladybug allows herself a few seconds to believe that everything will be alright. They can make it through this. They will get better. Him and her. They can do this.
She closes her eyes and lets her head back, taking a few breaths, letting the feeling soak in.
She feels a pair of eyes fixed on her. When she finally opens her eyes, she faces a worried look and a small smile.
“Thank you Chat Noir” she says and wishes he’d understand how much she means it.
“My’lady-” He begins to say but she doesn’t let him
“Things will change. I will change . I promise you this” She says, pulling all of her effort not to cry again.
“It’s you and me against the world” he says smiling ,hoping there was anything that he could do to make her feel better.
Maybe her words weren’t enough but Chat’s certantly are to make the tears run from the corners of her eyes.
“I wish I didn't have to go” she admits.
This has been the most physically and mentaly exhausting day of her life. She never felt more tired but she can’t even consider sleep as an option.How can she sleep and rest after what happened? . So so so many things changed, so many mistakes and risks were made , so much that was lost, so many powerful emotions and yet they couldn’t even grasp the new reality they lived in. How does one come home after something like this ?
“Part of me wants to stay transformed until I bring them all back and part of me never wants to be Ladybug again” She shares her thoughts openly . She truly meant it when she said things will change ,and the first thing on the list is to tear apart the wall that she built between them.
“Do we just go back to normal? Go back to school? pretend we’re fine?” The questions keep coming as panic spreads again through her.
Chat Noir’s steady hands shake her shoulders , clearing her mind.
“We go back my’lady. Maybe everything is not normal and maybe we’re not fine . But this is a fight that isn’t fought in one day . And maybe even getting up and ready for school is a fight against Hawkmoth,an act of bravery against his rein of terror. Because we can’t let him control our lives like that. If we start hiding then we let him win.”
Chat noir takes a deep breath . Green eyes meet blue ones. His heart melts but he has to stay strong for the both of them.
“There are things he can’t take away from us . He can’t take away our trust . He can’t take away our allies . He can’t take away your classmates nor mine, and the laughs you have together. He can’t take away your friendships or the love your parents give you.. And he can’t take me away from you” He says ,and he truly believes it.
“So you promise me my’lady that from tomorrow you’ll laugh a little louder and smile a little brighter . Promise me that you’ll go to school and pay attention to your classes and take care of yourself outside of that costume. Promise me that you will try to sleep tonight , and if you can’t ,remember that I'm somewhere out there. Maybe I’m even closer than you think”
“I promise” Is all she can say. Her heart filled with warmth after hearing his small speech that’s forever engraved in her heart.
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These are the words Marinette keeps replaying in her head as she lays on her bed facing her skylight. Her cheeks are still red and damp from all the crying and her chest feels empty. But Chat Noir’s words win over a small place in her aching heart , bringing hope everytime she feels lost again. The rain falling is the only sound she hears in her quiet now room reminding her all that is lost but also that he is somewhere out there.
They will make it.
She feels her eyes closing before she drifts into sleep.