Chapter Text
Ryūnosuke Akutagawa: the infamous Port-Mafia executive known for his cruel punishments and ruthless philosophies.
They say he rose out of hell clutching nothing but his ability and a will to live. That he rose up in the ranks under stark discipline and the usage of nothing but perfection.
Tonight, as he stands across from me, all I can see is a man who’s been loved too little and lost too much. A man who’s been put down over and over, who can only get back up and expect nothing but the same repetition. A man who has nothing but his values to hold on to.
And as he stares back at me with those piercing, gray eyes of his, all I can think about is how much I want to do for him. How much I want to give him, to show him that he’s loved and that he can let go once in awhile.
“Akutagawa,” I murmured. “Why did you call me here?”
His eyes– his gorgeous, sharp, penetrative eyes– narrow. He steps closer to me, his coat fluttering in the silent, cold wind. I instinctively back up against the wall, and he raises an arm above my shoulder; trapping me in a kabedon-esque pose.
He licks his soft, plush lips, looking away for a moment– almost nervous. He then meets my eyes again, daring me to look away as he moves his head closer.
“Jinko,” he murmurs,
(he doesn’t say atsushi. he never does, not even in vulnerable moments like these.)
“shut up.”
He then bites at my ear, and I gasp instinctively at the pain; clutching his coat to pull him closer. I feel him smirk against my cheek, just as he raises a leg to---
“Atsushi.”
Oh, the writer thinks. Oh no.
Atsushi, the aforementioned writer, subtly jumps up from his chair and leaps at his laptop, shutting it closed with a SLAM! that echoed throughout the agency’s office. The room grew dead silent as its occupants turned to stare at him.
…..So maybe he wasn’t as graceful as a white tiger. He was still trying to get the hang of it, alright?
Atsushi grinned shakily, sitting back down and wrapping an arm over his laptop; cradling it close like a mother would to her dear child.
“Y…Yes, Kunikida?”
The tall, blonde man stared down at him, unimpressed. A hand pushed up the tinted glasses which hid his eyes.
Oops.
“Are you working, Atsushi?”
“Errr,” the weretiger looked away. “Define, ‘working’.”
“Hmmm~?” said Dazai, sliding into his vision on one of those spinny chairs the man loved so much. “Is Atsushi doing something…. naughty?”
Atsushi choked. “Why would you phrase it like that?”
Dazai smiled, opening his mouth to continue with the taunt before being interrupted by Kunikida’s cough: a gesture to politely tell the both of them to shut the fuck up.
“Atsushi,” he continued, “it seems that lately you have been distracted. I haven’t yet received that case file back that I sent you to fill out a few days ago.”
Atsushi flushed, scratching the back of his neck. “Sorry, Kunikida. I’ll get it done right away.”
The blonde frowned, shaking his head. “That isn’t the issue at hand.”
He put his palm on Atsushi’s shoulder.
“If you need to take some time off from work, just let me know, okay?”
The weretiger bit his lip, then nodded.
“I can’t have my workers slacking off like this. Everyone needs their performance at their peak, which includes you."
Atsushi bowed his head down in shame.
“I understand.”
The second time it happens is a sign he should get new friends. Ones that respect his personal space, atleast.
He was on his lunch break, curled into one of the comfy benches of the Agency’s cafe and drinking a nice cup of green tea.
Enter: Dazai.
He swung open the doors, cheerful as usual as he walked up to one of the baristas, kneeling down on one knee and asking for her hand in a double suicide.
A typical Tuesday, though those unfamiliar with his antics were clapping, happy for the assumed couple.
Atsushi sighed and looked back towards his computer, Google Docs on the front page.
This chapter that he was writing in his story was really good. Juicy, even. He just had to send it to his beta reader, and then post it.
He smiled dreamily, imagining his work on the front page of Wattpad . The next 50 Shades of Gray , even.
He went back to typing.
“Hey, Atsushi!”
please don’t come over here please don’t come over here please don’t come over here please don’t—-
Dazai swung an arm around his shoulders, scooching into the cafe booth.
Atsushi looked away, begging that he wouldn’t make a scene. “....Hi, Dazai.”
He doesn’t know why he’d raise his expectations that high. It’s Dazai, for goodness sake.
The man smiled, looking over to his computer screen. His eyes scanned over the page—
“Oi!” Atsushi yelled, slamming the laptop shut and hugging it close, away from his prying eyes.
Dazai’s eyebrows shot up in surprise, and he put his hands up.
Atsushi flushed, his shoulders relaxing as he realized that maybe that was… a bit of an overreaction.
“ Relax, Atsushi,” the man’s eyes narrowed. “Why have you been so secretive lately?”
The weretiger looked away, a bit annoyed at the prying. Being the coworker of the city’s best detectives meant that he couldn’t have any privacy, ever.
“Are you….” Dazai tilted his head, “on your period, or something?”
Atsushi frowned. “Dazai, I don’t know if you can tell, but I’m a guy.”
Dazai shrugged. “Some guys can have periods. Or maybe you being a weretiger affects your anatomy…?”
Dazai mumbled to himself as Atsushi pondered on whether the window next to him would be big enough to climb through.
“Lay off, Dazai. That has nothing to do with anything.”
Ah, Ranpo. His savior.
“He was probably just texting his boyfriend on Grindr, or whatever the kids call it these days.”
Nevermind.
Atsushi’s face heated: “Boyfriend? ”
Dazai sighed. “Guess I owe Yosano her ten yen.”
“You...You were betting on whether I was–”
Ranpo got into the bench across from them, resting his head on his intertwined hands.
“So, am I right, or am I right?”
“I don’t even have Grindr—”
Ranpo smirked. “So you're not denying the claim on your sexuality?”
Atsushi put his head on the table, screaming into his arms.
Most people had evacuated the cafe at this point, which was the only silver lining in this interrogation.
“I hate you both,” he mumbled.
“You don’t mean that,” Dazai smiled.
“I wish I did.”
Ranpo hummed, staring at the closed computer under him.
“So, what were you doing?”
Atsushi looked back up at him, “Hm?”
“On your computer.”
“Ah,” he looked to the side, avoiding Ranpo’s eyes.
(He would soon come to realize that this was his fatal mistake; you should never look away while talking to Ranpo.)
“I was….writing.”
Ranpo sat up, “Oh?”
Dazai looked up from where he was drinking Atsushi’s tea, “Oh? I didn’t take you as the writer type, Atsushi.”'
Atsushi shrugged. “It’s fun, plus it’s a good stress reliever.” The, ‘ in more ways than one ’ went left unsaid.
They sat in silence for a moment before Ranpo stood up.
“Well,” he scooched out of the booth, waving before he turned around and walked towards the door. “I have to go meet with my Poe now— I’ll see you both tomorrow. Or maybe just Atsushi, if Dazai decides to skip again.”
Dazai waved back, “Toodle-oo!”
The door shut with a melodic ring from the cafe’s bell.
Atsushi frowned. “Didn’t he just get here?”
Dazai sipped his tea and smiled.
Ranpo had a plan.
Most of his plans usually ended with someone suing the agency, but this one was pretty tame so hopefully there wouldn’t be too much public outcry.
(They’re still dealing with the paperwork from that time Ranpo publicly cussed out a political figure for cheating on his wife. Good news, though: they divorced.)
“Poe,” Ranpo looked over his shoulder, calling out to his boyfriend. “Can you help me with something?”
The guild’s ex-architect appeared in an instant, “do you need assistance, Ranpo?”
The detective smiled, watching as Karl, their raccoon, crawled up his boyfriend’s arm to rest on his shoulder.
Poe worked on his novels from home, which made him able to care of Ranpo since he wasn’t very good at day-to-day tasks.
“I have a plan— and hear me out this time! It’s a good one,” Ranpo said with a grin, placing his hands on his hips. "---but, I’ll need your help with it.”
“Ranpo…uh, please, do tell…” Poe said, a bit of worry lacing his tone.
Ranpo has attempted many mischievous plans, but Poe never judged and helped him along, knowing that Ranpo was indeed very smart.
Ranpo smiled, walking over to the small table cluttered with objects (which Poe would usually clean up, but he’s been out and about all morning), grabbing the book labeled Atsushi , and handing it over to Poe for him to read.
“I need you to trap Atsushi and Akutagawa in this book, and it may seem a bit odd at first, but trust me on this.” Ranpo explained to Poe as he skimmed through the book.
Poe looked up at Ranpo, confused. “As much as I trust you dear, who wrote this? It‘s very.. er— ill-suited."
Ranpo grinned, “This is Atsushi’s work! As you can see, he wrote about him and Akutagawa being all cute, and as his friends it is our job to make his dreams come true and set them up!”
Poe closed the book, setting it down on the table. “Well, it seems that you have this all figured out, so just tell me what to do and I’ll do it.”
Ranpo beamed at his boyfriend’s loyalty, kissing his cheek.
“You act like a pup following his mother, darling.” Ranpo said, watching Poe’s flush go down to the low of his neck. “But with our plan, do you by any chance have Kyoka’s number?”
“Sure.”
Poe looked at the girl in surprise.
“Really? You’ll do this for us?”
Ranpo smirked. “Told you she’d say yes.”
Kyouka looked back at them, shaking her head.“It’s not as much for you as it is for Atsushi,” she smiled shyly, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear like Debby Ryan. “I want him and Akutagawa to get together because then I'll be related to Gin!”
Poe tilted his head, “Gin?"
Kyouka giggled, nodding. “I like Gin, she seems… kind.”
Right. Ever since her joining the agency, her and the weretiger’s bond had only strengthened. She now affectionately referred to the two as ‘siblings’ despite not fully understanding what the label entailed. Atsushi had tried to tell her that they weren’t, since they didn’t share the same parents. She then argued that family shouldn’t be held back by blood, and he’d know that since they had watched Lilo and Stitch together.
(Atsushi never said anything to contradict it again.)
Ranpo paused for a moment, then shrugged.
“So, the deal’s a deal?”
He nudged Poe, who whispered something to Karl; the racoon resting along his shoulder like usual. Karl yawned, reaching into his fur to bring out a chocolate bar, then handed it back towards the writer.
Kyouka watched on with wide, intrigued eyes.
Poe got on his knees, and dramatically held up the candy towards Kyouka.
“One order for Ms. Kyouka.”
The girl giggled and took the chocolate bar, looking down at it adoringly.
Poe got back up as Ranpo bowed dramatically: “And more of that to come, once you fill your end of the bargain!”
Kyouka looked back up at the two, determination etched onto her features.
“Er…..Kyouka, why did you want me to come with you again?”
“To shop for clothes.”
“You couldn’t have invited Yosano? I’m sure she has a better fashion sense than I do.”
Kyouka looked behind her at Atsushi, tilting her head. “I wouldn’t want to burden Yosano with carrying all this stuff,” She looked over to the bags Atsushi was struggling to carry, resisting the urge to smile. “You’re also not as scary as her.”
Atsushi huffed, trying not to feel hurt. He could be scary if he wanted to.
Alas, he appreciated the invitation as Kyouka never really asked to do things with the agency. “Alright, where to next?”
Kyouka paused, as if remembering something. “What time is it?”
Atsushi set down the bags at his feet and pulled out his phone, reading the screen aloud: “12:27pm,” he looked back up to her, skeptical. “Why?”
“We should be good to go then,” Kyouka said, starting to walk away to her next destination. “Let’s go.”
Atsushi blinked, hastily picking up the bags as he rushed to catch up to her.
Whatever the girl lacked in height, she certainly made up for in speed.
“Uhh… Kyouka, are you sure this is where we are supposed to go? It doesn’t seem very… safe.” Atsushi voiced, grabbing onto Kyouka’s shirt. For her comfort or for his own, he’s not sure.
Per Kyouka’s request, they had left the bags at the entry to the alleyway; hidden behind a few dumpsters. When he had inquired as to why, she just said that they were going to meet somebody.
Kyouka turned to look at him, gently prying Atsushi’s fingers off. “Don’t worry Atsushi, we have a very famous detective looking out for us.”
Atsushi paused, puzzled as to who Kyouka was talking about. He sniffed the air— shut up , Dazai, it isn’t a furry thing— and froze as he saw the two figures waiting in the shadows.
“Kyouka—” he made a move to go in front of her, but she held out an arm to block his path.
He frowned, before the two stepped out into the light and…. oh .
Ranpo, smiling with a tipped hat, greeted him with a wave as a familiar, anxious guy with a twig-like form lurked behind him.
Poe, his mind supplied. And he had a raccoon. Apparently, those were domesticated now.
Kyouka gasped, waving back to them. “Ranpo, Poe! Hi!”
Atsushi’s brows furrowed as he looked between the couple and his friend. “Why are you two here?”
“That’s a rude question, Atsushi.” Ranpo said. “This is public property, you know?”
“Sorry, Ranpo,” he said instinctively, before blinking in confusion. “Wait, Kyouka, why are we here?”
The girl looked over to him with a glint in her eye, before smiling as she returned her gaze back to the pair.
“Have you already captured him?” she asked, like one would ask about the weather.
Ranpo looked down at her, amused. “Don’t worry, Kyouka. We have Akutagawa.”
The words swirl around in Atsushi’s head, but don’t quite make any connections. Are the three of them under some sort of ability? Should he be running away right now?
The detective then nudged Poe, and the other blinked, confused for a moment, before quickly nodding and tapping his raccoon.
Arlo, was it? Or Karl….Carlos?
Whatever its name is, it jumped up, off of Poe’s shoulder and towards Atsushi.
The weretiger cursed, raising his hands to block his face, but they got tugged down. A look to the side tells him that Ranpo had snuck up behind him. What was it with all these short people and their excess power…?
He tried to tug his arms back, going to activate his ability, but was interrupted with a mouthful of fur and a clawing to the face as the animal scuttered along his figure. It reached his neck, and it raised up on its hind legs before plunging something into his neck.
Rabies. It injected me with rabies.
He grabbed it, tugging it away from his neck as he waved it around in an attempt to throw it off him. Poe hurried to pull it out of his grasp, and all he could see was the poet whispering to it, handing it some scraps, before a bag was pulled over his head.
“I’ve never kidnapped someone before,” he distantly heard Kyouka mutter. “Is it always this easy?”
Treason, Atsushi thought distantly. They never covered that in my training.
His mind escaped him, and he felt himself fall towards the ground.