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Luz stared ahead with a blank expression on her face as Eda and King absorbed the information she had just finished giving. She had no idea what to feel; too many things had happened all at once. It was too much for her to comprehend.
“So... Philip Wittebane... is Belos,” Eda stated firmly, her tone laced with shock and disbelief.
“Yes,” Luz’s hands trembled.
“And he’s a witch hunter?” King asked in horror, hoping it wasn’t true.
“Yes,” her mind was overflowing, it was all too much.
Eda shifted on the couch.
“Damn, kid,” she muttered sympathetically. “I’m sorry you had to go through that.”
Luz only shrugged, she still wouldn’t look at Eda or King. She just continued to stare at the wall as if she were waiting for something to pop out.
“It’s okay.”
Eda and King shared a look, obviously perturbed by Luz’s silent, emotionless state. It was upsetting to see on the girl that was usually the embodiment of smiles and rainbows. It hurt them to see her act like a shell of herself.
Luz knew this, she knew her behavior would upset them, but she couldn’t snap out of it. There were too many emotions scratching beneath an extremely thin surface, but at the same time, several locks and chains kept them trapped. They wouldn’t come out, and Luz didn’t know if she wanted them to, or not. The part of her that wanted to scream, and cry, and let someone hold her was desperate to let the emotions surface, to let them wash over her like a wave. The other part of her that worked tirelessly to keep her steel walls intact around her wasn’t ready for the wave that would crash into her, that would drown her. She was stuck in a limbo of wanting to feel but wanting to avoid it at the same time. So, her mind paused in times of immense stress and emotions, and she was left feeling numb and empty, and yet, she felt everything , and it kept piling and piling on top of her. Her mind was blank, but it was also overloaded with the most recent events. She could barely feel her body, but she still felt a persistent buzzing sensation all over. It was an awful mix of black and white, and hot and cold. Luz hated it!
“So, how did you get us out?” Luz tilted her head so that she was almost looking at Eda. Almost.
“Some rando gave us the spell,” Eda answered, then her face morphed into a nervous expression. “Although, to make sure it worked, we needed something a lot more... powerful.”
Eda clenched her jaw as she glanced at Luz with worried eyes.
“You see, we kinda-”
“We used the rest of your Titans blood!!!” King blurted out, looking like he was ready to combust.
“King!” Eda exclaimed as he proceeded with his frantic explanation.
“I’m so sorry, Luz! We were running out of time, and we didn’t have any options! We just really needed to get you out! We wouldn’t have used it if it wasn’t to save your life, I promise! I’m just so sorry, Luz!”
Luz remained eerily silent as she listened to King.
The Titans blood was gone. The thing that would get her home was gone. The thing that got Philip home was gone. They used the rest of it to get her and Hunter out of the mindscape. Belos’ mind. Philips mind. Belos is Philip. Philip never went home. Philip stayed in the demon realm. Philip became Belos. Belos killed many. Belos was going to kill Hunter.
“Luz?” Eda called her name. “Are you with us?”
Luz blinked. “Yeah, I’m with you.”
“Are you... mad at us?” King asked hesitantly.
Luz didn’t need to think about her answer.
“I’m not mad,” she answered truthfully. “I understand, you did what you had to do. I understand.”
Eda nodded cautiously, as if she were waiting for Luz to change her mind. Drowsiness suddenly invaded her senses as she yawned, which was the most active she had been since returning from the mindscape.
“I think I’m going to go to bed now,” she proclaimed as she stood from the couch.
“Alright, let us know if you need anything,” Eda told Luz before she dragged herself up the stairs and to her room.
Luz barely remembered brushing her teeth or putting on her PJs. She slid into her sleeping bag, laying her head on her pillow as she rested her eyes.
A large blade shot towards her head.
Luz abruptly shot upright, her eyes wide with panic as she gasped for air. She clutched at her chest, hoping to ease her irregular heartbeat that was currently hammering against her ribcage.
“He’s not here. He’s not here. He’s not here,” Luz repeated to herself like a mantra until her heart slowed.
She let out a long, weary sigh as she laid back down. Luz continued to take deep breaths to keep herself calm as she tried to sleep.
In and out. In and out. Inhale and exhale. Inhale and exhale.
Hunter sinking into the ground, powerless to stop it.
Luz’s breath hitched in her throat as her eyes shot open in fear.
No, Hunter was not dead. He was not dead, he just... ran away. Luz had no idea where he went, or if he was alright, but it wasn’t like he was gone forever. Everything was fine, they got out of the mindscape safely. Hunter wasn’t dead, he wasn’t gone forever.
Luz groaned in annoyance as she closed her eyes, forgoing the deep breaths since they didn’t seem to work. She pulled herself into a fetal position as she tried to sleep.
“Hello, Luz.”
Luz moaned pitifully as she pulled the covers up to her chin, her body shook and trembled, but it wasn’t from the cold. The hairs on the nape of her neck bristled as that sickening voice rang through her ears, scratching against her eardrums.
“No! No! No! You’re Belos! You’re just Belos!”
“Please, do me a kindness, and call me by my real name.”
Luz tossed and turned as her heart lodged in her throat. Her stomach twisted into tightly wounded knots and unbearable pressure began to build behind her eyes. Luz didn’t want to think about it, she was so tired, she just wanted to sleep. However, sleep would not claim her anytime soon, the longer she kept her eyes closed, the more vivid the memories became. Everything was too fresh in Luz’s mind, and every time she tried to forget about it, it would come back and smack her right in the face. She whined pathetically as she yanked at her hair, trying to find a way to ground herself. It felt like thousands of tiny bugs were crawling all over her body, burrowing holes into her skin and her brain pounded against her skull, trying to break out of it. It was quiet except for the creaking of the old floorboards; the minimal sounds made her teeth grind.
Just don’t think about it! Don’t think about it at all! Ignore it! Shut it down! Just sleep!
Luz’s lungs squeezed as her chest constricted. Sweat beaded her hairline as she curled into a tighter ball, her knees pressed against her chest. There were ugly monsters she didn’t want to face, all of them fought and tormented her as they clawed their way to the surface. The only thing holding them down was a thin sheet of tissue paper, and no matter how many times they ripped it, Luz taped it back together.
Don’t think about it! Don’t think about it! Don’t think! Don’t think!
“I told you once before, Luzura . Perhaps we were destined to meet.”
Something inside Luz snapped. The sheet of paper tore apart. The monsters burst from their cages.
Luz let out an enraged, pain-stricken scream into her pillow before ripping it out from underneath her and hurled it against the wall. She kicked away her sleeping bag as she hid her face in her knees, yanking and tugging at her hair, accidentally pulling out a few strands. The soft thud of the pillow hitting the floor did nothing to satisfy her, it only left her angrier. Luz rocked back and forth, occasionally hitting her temple as her breathing came out in rough, rapid pants. She squeezed her eyes shut as tears spilled from them, but then Belos’s face appeared in her mind. Luz growled like a scared, wild animal as she mindlessly reached for her bedside table and flipped it over, its contents spilling to the floor. Her chest heaved with broken sobs as she grabbed at the papers littering the floor and crumpled and ripped them apart. She pressed her knuckles against her wet eyes, the crumpled papers still in her hands, the sounds ripped from her throat were a mix of strangled cries and hyperventilating breaths. Everything was sore and throbbing, her strong emotions had reached the boiling point and now she was too overwhelmed to contain them. She felt as if someone had stabbed a hot knife into her heart, and no matter how many times she tried to stop it, to soothe the hurt, the knife kept twisting and twisting and twisting until there was nothing left. Luz didn’t know how to stop it; it was like trying to stop a tsunami, it would only crash into you at full force, no mercy as you fought against its currents, trying to reach the surface. She didn’t have any choice but to just let it happen, to wait for it to pass even though it made her cry, made breathing difficult, and made her want to tear herself apart just to end the hurt. Luz just wanted it to end, these feelings never stopped, they always stuck around, haunting her, waiting for the next crisis. They were always there, fighting against her mental barriers.
Luz wiped away the tears streaming down her cheeks, only for new ones to replace them. She tried again; the same thing happened. She was like a burst fire hydrant; the water wouldn’t stop coming. Luz groaned in annoyance, the sound thick from the tears. She had just begun to stop hyperventilating, her heartbeat calming, until she caught sight of a familiar, brown, leather journal. Luz tentatively picked it up, staring intently at the cover through her blurry vision.
Philips diary.
The diary that had helped her throughout her journey to get home. The diary she had thought had helped Philip get home. She had thought Philip was someone who would help her, but instead, he tricked her and tried to kill her. She trusted his judgements so blindly; she followed his instructions like they were her own lifeline. She relied entirely on Philip to help her get home, but Philip was Belos.
The waves of panic and sadness roared back as Luz dug her blunt nails into the worn-out cover, creating half-moons in the leather. She glared at the diary with a burning hatred. It was tainted, filled with pages and pages of tricks and lies, and she fell for them so easily.
Now she knew the truth, but at what cost? Her only way home was a lie and there was no more Titans blood. Luz was right back where she started, but she felt more lost than ever. She quivered like a leaf as she mindlessly reverted to her panicked hyperventilating. Luz wanted to destroy the diary, she wanted to tear apart every page, and burn it all to ashes. She hated it, everything she learned from those words, she learned from Belos. She wanted to get rid of it so badly, but she couldn’t. Luz had learned so much from his diary, and a tiny part of her held onto the hope that it would still help her get home. It was a stupid hope, why would a villain help her?
Rows and rows of broken golden guard masks, all killed by Belos.
Hunter would’ve been next.
In a burst of anger, Luz spun around and flung the dreaded book against the window... until the window opened, and it hit Hunter right in the face.
Hunter yelped in surprise as he clutched his nose, Flapjack hovered over him, worried.
“Hunter!” Luz exclaimed as she helped him climb through the window. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to hit you! I just didn’t expect you to be there!”
“It’s fine,” he told her, plainly as he let his hand fall from his face.
Luz grimaced internally; Hunter’s face was as pale as a ghost, the bags under his eyes were darker than they were before, which should’ve been impossible, and his eyes were red and puffy. He looked awful, not that she looked any better. Luz couldn’t even begin to imagine what Hunter was going through, she suddenly felt guilty for pitying herself. What happened to her was nothing compared to what he went through. His world had practically been flipped upside down.
“Where did you go?” Luz asked dubiously. “I... I was worried.”
Hunter’s shoulders rose to his ears as he tensed.
“I wasn’t thinking clearly,” he answered. “I just... I needed to go, but... I don’t have anywhere to go, and you said... you said that-”
“That you could stay here... if you want,” Luz finished for him.
Hunter nodded, looking anywhere else but her.
Suddenly, the bedroom door burst open, revealing a concerned Eda.
“Luz? Are you-” she straightened up, surprised once she saw Hunter. “Oh, you’re back.”
“Eda, can he stay here?” Luz pleaded.
Eda glanced at Hunter. She only saw the scared kid that had suffered a panic attack in her living room instead of the emperor's right-hand man. It felt impossible to think of him that way after what Luz told her.
“Sure, kid,” Eda nodded.
Her eyes fell upon the mess Luz had created, then she observed her with concern.
“Are you alright?”
Luz chuckled nervously, scratching the back of her neck.
“I’m fine,” she lied. “It was just an accident. I’ll clean it up.”
Eda narrowed her eyes, suspiciously. She obviously didn’t believe Luz, not when the kid had red eyes and tear tracks on her face, but now didn’t feel like a good time to pry. Everyone was tired and restless; it would be better to bring it up tomorrow. Eda turned to Hunter, gesturing for him to follow her.
“Come on, kid,” she said. “I’ll get a room ready for you.”
Hunter was about to follow Eda out of the room until Luz’s voice made them freeze.
“Or you could sleep here,” she blurted out before her mind could catch up with her mouth.
Luz’s face reddened in embarrassment, she wanted to take back the words the minute they came out of her mouth. It felt so wrong to let herself be vulnerable around others, but at the same time, the thought of being alone right now terrified her. She would be alone with her thoughts, and so far, her mind wasn’t the best place to be alone in.
“Only... only if you want,” she added hastily. “I don’t mind.
Luz’s body was as tense as a bowstring as she watched her fingers pick at a loose thread in her sleeping bag. She waited for what felt like forever for Hunter to answer, to possibly reject her offer, and leave her alone. Luz wouldn’t mind if he did, he probably wanted to be alone, she understood. Luz could handle herself; she would just have to stay quiet.
“Okay,” Hunter answered softly.
Luz’s eyes snapped towards him, widened in shock and her vulnerability fully on display. Hunter only stared at his feet; a sad frown etched across his face.
“I’ll find you some blankets and stuff,” Eda told him before leaving the two alone.
Hunter stood stiffly in one spot, unsure of what to do with himself as Luz promptly wiped away her remaining tears. She picked up her bedside table and gently placed it in its previous position. Luz bit her lip as she looked at the mess she had caused, at least the jar of electric bugs didn’t break. Those had been a pain to catch. She placed the jar back on the table, along with the photo of her and her mom, her Grom picture, and a used-up candle she hadn’t thrown away. Luz grabbed the potted plant, grimacing when soil spilled all over the floor.
“Dang it,” she scolded herself.
She was about to leave to get a broom when the soil disappeared in a flash of yellow magic. Luz turned towards Hunter who held his staff in his right hand.
“Thanks,” she said as she placed the pot on the table.
Hunter only nodded as Flapjack turned back into his bird form to rest on his shoulder. The silence between the two was awkward and tense as Luz continued to gather the papers scattered on the floor. She desperately searched for a way to break it, perhaps it could be a way to distract him... and herself.
“Sooo... your palismans name is Flapjack?” Luz asked curiously.
Hunter jumped, not expecting Luz to make conversation with him.
“Yeah,” he answered plainly.
Luz hummed, intrigued.
“I didn’t know the Boiling Isles had flapjacks.”
“We don’t,” Hunter corrected as he watched her with interest. “You know what a flapjack is?”
Luz gave him a half smile as she nodded.
“It’s a food from the human realm, I’ve never had it, but I think they’re like pancakes.”
Hunter scrunched his eyebrows in confusion, and a bit of... annoyance?
“And what are pancakes?” He asked gruffly, he glanced at Flapjack.
“It’s a breakfast food from the human realm,” she replied, unaware of the bewilderment on Hunters face. “It’s basically a very flat cake that is cooked in a frying pan. Hence why it’s called a pancake.”
“I knew that,” Hunter said, reluctantly as he began picking up the papers Luz had ripped and crumpled papers. “What do you want to do with these?”
Luz acknowledged the papers as he handed them to her. She sighed, she really wished she hadn’t done that to her notes. Deciding not to dwell on that, she smoothed out the crumpled papers.
“These ones are salvageable,” she answered as she slipped them into one of her books, she frowned at the torn papers. “I’ll have to rewrite these ones.”
Luz tossed the papers into the trashcan as Hunter continued to clean up. She spun around to face him but froze when she saw Philips diary in his hands. The way he eyed it curiously made her limbs tremble.
“This is the book you threw at me, right?” He asked as he gave it to Luz.
“That... that was an accident,” she stuttered.
Taking notice of her shaky hands, Hunter frowned at her.
“Who is Philip Wittebane?” He asked, skeptically.
Luz anxiously avoided Hunters face, glaring at the name scribbled on the journal in her hands. She couldn’t talk about this, not right now. She was barely processing this, how on the Boiling Isles was she supposed to tell Hunter? He had gone through too much in such as short amount of time, she couldn’t just drop this bomb on him. Luz didn’t want to lie to him either. If she lied to him now and he found out on his own, then he would know she lied. Hunter already had one person lying to him all his life, she needed to be truthful with him.
“Philip... Philip Wittebane... is Belos.”
Luz watched with dread as his eyes widened in disbelief. She flinched when the diary was snatched out of her hands, Hunter desperately flipped through the old pages. He turned towards Luz; he was about to speak when a knock on the door interrupted him.
“Come in!” Luz called, and Eda entered, holding a few blankets and pillows.
“I don’t have another sleeping bag lying around so, I just grabbed all the blankets I could find,” Eda explained as she dropped them at Luz’s feet.
“Thanks, Eda,” Luz said, trying and failing to sound cheerful.
Eda frowned at the attempt.
“Call me if you two need anything,” she poked Luz in the forehead. “Seriously kid, call.”
Luz nodded in affirmation as Eda closed the door on her way out. She turned towards Hunter who sat on his knees with the diary open in his lap.
“Hunter?” Luz sat next to him with a concerned expression.
Hunter shook his head in disbelief.
“This person is human,” he stated, mournfully. “He can’t be Belos.”
“I didn’t know he was Belos until we went into his mind,” Luz explained.
Hunter gawks at her.
“When did that.... when did we... when?!” He demanded, puzzled.
Luz’s hands tightened into fists.
“After you... after Belos... the ground thing,” she stammered nervously, but Hunter understood. “Belos showed me... apparently, I had met him.”
“What do you mean?” He asked. “You didn’t know you had met him?”
Luz chuckled humorlessly.
“I don’t mean the petrification ceremony if that’s what you’re talking about. Can I see this?”
She gestured at the diary; Hunter tossed it to her. Luz flipped through the pages until she reached the familiar faded sketch of a Stone Sleeper, she showed it to Hunter.
“Read this,” she told him, pointing at the passage underneath the sketch.
“I singlehandedly defeated the beast behind the door, tragically, I could not save my companions.”
“Me and Lilith had gone back in time to Philips era-”
“Back in time?” Hunter interrupted.
“Time pools,” Luz answered simply.
“Time pools are a myth,” he said as if he was stating the obvious.
Luz scowled, irritated.
“Well, me and Lilith went through one, so no they’re not,” she claimed. “Now let me finish.”
“Fine,” Hunter huffed.
“Anyway, I needed more information for how to build a portal, and I thought talking to Philip would help,” Luz continued. “We went with him to find the collector-”
“That weird shadow child?”
Luz sent stared at Hunter with a deadpanned expression.
“I didn’t know what it was at the time but-”
“Why would you help him look for it if you didn’t know what it was?”
“I didn’t think it would be bad, I thought it would help.”
How did you know it would help?” Hunter asked in a challenging tone.
Luz glared.
“Well, he wrote about it in his diary and... oh for goodness sake, can you just let me finish?!”
Hunter crossed his arms.
“Fine.”
“So, I thought he was helping us, but it turns out he brought us along to be... sacrifices.”
“Sacrifices?!” Hunter exclaimed.
“We got away,” Luz assured him then her face turned smug. “Lilith punched him in the face... oh my goodness, Lilith punched the emperor in the face.”
Hunter looked more and more bewildered by the minute. Even Flapjack looked shocked.
“This... this doesn’t make any sense,” he sputtered. “Time pools. Sacrifices. Philip! Belos! None of it makes sense! It’s not true! None of it is true!”
Hunter shoved the book against Luz’s chest, then hugged his arms around himself, visibly distressed.
“You don’t have to believe me,” she told him, sadly. “It’s a lot to take in, I know.”
Luz fiddled with the pages as Hunter stayed silent, trying to process the new information dump, not that he had done a great job with everything else.
“So... why do you have it?” He asked, glancing at the diary.
Luz closed the book with a loud thump.
“It was supposed to help me get home,” she answered as she stood up. “We don’t have to talk about this anymore.”
Luz locked the diary away in her chest where she could forget about it, even if it was just for a little while. She grabbed the pile of blankets and pillows.
“You can have my sleeping bag if you want,” she offered. “I’m used to sleeping on the floor so it's no big deal.”
“I’m good with the blankets.”
Luz nodded, then she laid the blankets over the floor next to her sleeping bag, making a makeshift bed.
“There!” She exclaimed once she was finished, her hands planted on her hips. “It’s not perfect but it's better than laying directly on the floor. I’ve gotten splinters from doing that.”
“It’s fine.”
“Alrighty then, now all that’s left is to... go to sleep,” Luz said with dread. “Should be easy enough.”
“Totally,” Hunter said sarcastically as he laid on his layers of blankets, Flapjack perched right next to his head.
Luz followed Hunters lead and slid into her sleeping bag. The snuggly fabric around her should have been grounding, but she was filled with too much dread to notice. She glanced at Hunter who laid on his back with an arm tossed over his eyes.
Luz stared at the ceiling as her eyes drooped close, only for them to snap open. She was tired. She was so tired and exhausted; she just wanted to sleep and forget about everything, but she knew that wouldn’t be so easy. It didn’t matter if she was asleep or awake, her mind would replay the events and force her to watch. It would torment her no matter what.
Well, if I’m going to lose either way, I might as well do that and get some sleep, Luz thought to herself.
She shut her eyes, her body tensing and untensing in an attempt to relax. She could try counting sheep, that would make her tired. Luz was willing to try anything at this point.
One sheep. Two sheep. Three sheep.
Luz’s brain grew cloudy with drowsiness as the rewind of sheep jumping over a fence played in her mind.
Four sheep. Five sheep. Six sheep.
Her chest rose in calming breaths as sleep began to claim her.
Seven sheep. Eight sheep. Nine sheep.
The tenth sheep doesn’t make it over the fence. Belos grabs it by the neck and snaps it. The sheep gets absorbed into his arm.
“Can’t reason with crazy.”
Luz’s senses returned to her in full clarity as sleep was ripped away from her. She gasped in panic; her eyes wide open as she shot up from her sleeping bag. Hunter sat up with her, startled from the sudden episode. Flapjack chirped urgently, though Luz didn’t understand him.
“Are you okay?” He asked, worried.
Luz pressed a hand against her chest, soothing her frantic heartbeat.
“I’m okay,” she answered breathlessly. “Did I wake you?”
Hunter shook his head.
“I wasn’t asleep.”
Once Luz calmed down, she laid back down, even though she was now wide awake. Hunter had gone back to his previous position with his arm over his eyes. Luz sighed; this was going to be a long night.
“Are you asleep?”
Hunter didn’t move.
“Yes,” he answered slowly.
“You don’t sound like it,” Luz chuckled lightly.
“It’s because I’m not, Luz,” Hunter let his arm fall to his side.
Luz gave him a faint smile, letting herself enjoy the lighthearted atmosphere.
“Willow told me that back at the... back there, you wake up at 6am every morning.”
Hunter glared at her.
“Yeah, so?”
“Even on weekends?”
Hunter nodded.
“I barely function at 6am,” Luz scoffed.
Hunters face scrunched in confusion.
“What?”
“We don’t do that here,” she continued as if he hadn’t said anything. “Waking up at 6 in the morning; that is a big no on Eda’s list. I just do it when I go to school.”
“Hexside, right?”
“Just like Willow,” Luz confirmed as she rolled on her side. “Speaking of, I didn’t know you like flyer derby.”
“Neither did I,” Hunter said. “I don’t really do much outside of work for my... for the emperor.”
Luz frowned; the lighthearted atmosphere vanished at the reminder that Belos was a jerk. Jerk was a huge understatement; murderer was more accurate. He had no problem with hurling a large blade toward Luz’s head. She shuddered to think that she probably wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for Hunter.
“Hey, thanks for saving me... back in Belos’ mind,” she told Hunter, his jaw clenched. “That would’ve gotten really bad if you hadn’t shown up in time. You saved my life.”
“It’s fine,” Hunter replied, so fast that the two words crashed into each other.
Now would’ve been the perfect time for Luz to keep her mouth shut. It would have been the perfect time for her to stay quiet and not make things worse. Hunter already had to live with what he learned, bringing it up again would not help. Luz was never good at keeping her mouth shut.
“I’m sorry.”
That spurred a reaction out of Hunter as he turned his head towards Luz, puzzled.
“Why?”
Luz huffed. That was a good question. She just felt like everything was her fault, it was always her fault. Luz didn’t know if it really was, or if it was just a force of habit for her to blame herself for everything. She just wished she had done something differently, but at the same time, she knew it had to happen. If everything in Belos’ mind hadn’t happened, Hunter would still be at the castle. Luz didn’t know how he felt about that, but to her, it was for the best that he was away from Belos. Maybe Luz could look at this as screwed up blessing in disguise, maybe it was selfish to think that. She just wished it didn’t hurt so much.
Why did it always have to hurt so much?
“I’m just... sorry about everything,” Luz answered as her eyes burned. “I’m sorry about everything that happened.”
Hunter looked away; his gaze trained on the ceiling as his eyes glistened.
“Don’t mention it,” his voice was thick as his teeth chattered.
Luz couldn’t look at him as her eyes brimmed with tears... again.
“I know, it’s just...” she wiped away her tears. “You didn’t deserve it. You didn’t deserve any of it.”
Luz bit down on her lip, trapping her cries in her throat. She really didn’t want to cry again, not in front of Hunter. It was so hard for her to cry in front of others. She had had a few close calls with Eda and Amity, aside from that, she mostly kept it to herself. Belos had seen her cry, she realized. She had broken down in front of him, and he had watched her like a king on his throne. He had taunted her and played with her state of vulnerability. The thought of such a horrible person seeing her like that was sickening.
The sound of sniffling from beside her snapped Luz out of her thoughts. Her heart dropped into her stomach like a brick when she watched Hunter burst into tears. It made it difficult for Luz to hold back her own cries as his shoulders shook with grief-stricken sobs. Flapjack nuzzled against Hunters temple, his eyes were squeezed shut as tears streamed down his face, and his hand clenched around the fabric over his chest. Luz’s lower lip trembled as she reached for Hunter, placing her hand on his own. She hoped it would bring him some comfort, even though it probably didn’t.
“It’s going to be okay,” she croaked as more tears spilled down her cheeks. “It’s going to be okay.”
Luz’s heart shattered to pieces as Hunter shook his head.
“It’s not,” he cried. “Please don’t say that. It’s not going to be okay.”
He sounded so broken, so lost. Luz wished she could make it better, but she felt lost too. Her breath came out in shuddering pants as she began to pull her hand away. It wasn’t helping him anyway. Luz hadn’t helped anyone, she just made it worse.
She gasped, startled when Hunter suddenly yanked her hand back before it could go far. He clutched it like a lifeline as he continued to sob. Luz couldn’t contain herself anymore, she buried her face in her pillow as her mental barriers were torn down. The sobs she had pushed down were painfully ripped from her throat. Her hand squeezed Hunters’ as if it was her way of telling him she was there.
“I’m sorry,” Luz cried, her voice thick with tears. “I’m so sorry!”
Hunter squeezed back, and they both cried harder. They couldn’t speak, they couldn’t do anything but drown in grief, fear, and sadness.
It didn’t matter how many monsters they fought, or how much confidence they had in their abilities. It didn’t matter that they were constantly given more than they could handle. At the end of the day, they were just kids, kids that had escaped hell and all its monsters.
Now they had to suffer the repercussions of it.