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Abuela and Pepa took him to buy an outfit for today because he “needs something special for a special day”. It was sweet, and he really appreciated it, but he drew the line at wearing a tie.
It also felt… it didn’t give him a panic attack. The circumstances were different, sure, but the thought of going to buy a suit, or wearing one for that matter, still left him feeling skittish. So he thinks this is a big step. And no, Frank, he is not going to get into that.
And he did want to look nice. He’s been learning to appreciate that he is, indeed, handsome. To believe it. And to, as May put it, “work it”. He specially wanted to put in the effort for Hen and Karen. So really, it was a win-win situation for him, suit crisis be damned.
When he arrives at the venue he feels out of his depth. It’s not like he goes to these types of events often, or to formal events in general. Fancy restaurants are also a rarity in his life.
But when he looks around it’s made even more apparent by the fact that he’s not used to seeing his friends (his family) dressed up. Sure, they’ve celebrated graduations and birthdays and some other events together, but they don’t really dress up often.
He spots Maddie first. She’s wearing a beautiful wine colored dress. And she seems… at ease. The smile on her face is no longer forced. He feels this overwhelming urge to give her a hug, because he is proud of her. They’re not really close, their link being the 118 and Buck.
That, speaking of which, he can’t find in the crowd. He tries to find him, but he doesn’t get far in his search before Christopher speaks up.
“Dad, I’m gonna go look for Denny and Harry.”
Eddie chuckles, before he runs his hands across Chris’ shoulders before he replies.
“Alright mijo, if you need anything just holler.”
Chris’ nose scrunches up and he rolls his eyes and Eddie- he recognizes both of those expressions, and is floored at how much one of them reminds him of another head full of curls.
“Ok, dad.”
And then he’s just left standing alone. He watches Chris walk away and tries not to fidget in place. He’s so in his head that he doesn’t notice someone come over and stand beside him until he feels a hand on his shoulder.
“Eddie, how are you? You look dapper.”
He breathes a sigh of relief when he turns his head and sees Maddie. He still hasn’t found his Buckley, but Maddie is just such a calming presence that Eddie can’t help but feel relaxed when he’s around her.
“I’m good. You look beautiful.”
Maddie just laughs lightly and smiles brightly at him. A smile so inherently ‘Buckley’ that reminds him of the other smile he dreams about.
“Thank you. You must be looking for Buck. He’s with Jee in the garden. They wanted to look at the flower arrangements.”
There’s a knowing glint in her. Something that reminds him of the looks his sisters gave him before he came back from El Paso. He gives her a shy smile before he excuses himself to go look for the love of- his best friend. To look for his best friend.
Ever since he came back from El Paso he hasn’t been able to cage his feeling back in. To lock them up in a container that the sunlight could never reach. It’s been harder to not just blurt out everything that has been filing him up- enveloping him whole, for years now. He has to constantly bite his tongue before the damn breaks.
He thinks back to the session he had with Frank a couple of days before today. The same sentence bouncing around his head over and over again.
“You are allowed to be happy. To pursue things that make you happy, and hold onto them.”
And Eddie’s not entirely clueless. Not anymore at least. If he has to admit therapy helped him in something, he’ll say it was this. Because this is probably one of the most important things in Eddie’s life.
It’s this all encompassing feeling that he gets whenever he hears a boisterous laugh, or feels a hand tap him on his ribs to let him know someone’s walking behind him, or finds eyes squinting at him whenever he tries to fold the clean hoodies out of the drier because he “doesn’t fold them properly”.
It’s love. In its purest form. That epic love he used to read about under the covers at night when he was younger and used to steal his sisters’ books because he was afraid his dad would catch him doing it. Love that defies the odds. Destined love; of soulmates that find each other even if they are miles apart.
And Eddie often wants to cry because of it. He’s never really felt this kind of love for anyone in his life. Romantically, because the love he has for Christopher is a whole other ballpark. And he did love Shannon; he will always love her. But this is just-
He comes to a stop outside. Eddie feels his breathing stutter. He doesn’t know what he was expecting. They were at a wedding, of course this was a formal event. Formal attire was required. And still… Eddie just kind of forgot that applied to everyone. Or just to one person in particular.
But even if he remembered, nothing would’ve prepared him for what he is seeing right now. Because across the yard is Buck, holding his niece securely in one arm. They are both looking at a flower arrangement in awe. But Eddie’s eyes move from their faces to focus back on the arm holding Jee, flexing against a suit jacket.
A well tailored suit jacket. A well tailored suit in general, because those pants look like they were painted on Buck. And the color brings out his eyes. A light blue that Eddie, wildly, clocks for a part of Buck’s eye that is exactly the same color when the light is just right. Combined with a white button up that is straining against a well defined- more than well defined- chest is also just-
Buck looks breathtaking. Eddie’s brain feels like it’s being fried from how much heat he is currently feeling. And it’s not because of the sun. Or, not the sun in the sky. Because the one that’s standing all the way across a garden that has been set up for the vow renewal with seats, and pillars, and beautiful flowers all around- that sun is more radiant than the actual star in the sky.
Buck looks down at Jee and starts making silly faces at her. Eddie thinks that she’s probably babbling because he also sees Buck try to follow the conversation she has set between the two of them.
Eddie’s heart melts at the sight. He imagines a different wedding, with a different kid in Buck’s arms, years down the line. And he yearns.
Because he’s known that Buck is it for him. Buck has been it for Eddie for years now, but it’s only till now that he lets himself acknowledge it. And he needs to control himself before he drops down on his knee almost every single day since that revelation took place.
But now Eddie let’s himself dream of that future. He hasn’t made a move to do something about it yet, but he knows that once he does, he won’t be able to stop. Because Eddie wants the white picket fence, and a dog in the backyard, and blonde haired curls running at his feet with a teenager rolling his eyes at the scene, and to wake up every morning to the same blue eyes.
Eddie wants everything with Buck. He wants to the late nights trying to get their kids to fall asleep, he wants to go to the zoo whenever they get the chance to go, he wants the quite nights in. He wants to share his future with Buck. To keep building on what they have so far.
Buck suddenly looks up and their eyes meet. He beams at Eddie, his eyes shining with joy. And Eddie can’t help but return the smile.
He watches as Buck turns slightly so Jee has a clear view of Eddie before he whispers something in her ear while he points in his direction. And then Jee starts screaming with joy when she notices him and makes grabby hands at him to carry her.
He starts to walk closer to the two of them and he hears Jee repeat “‘ddie, ‘ddie, ‘ddie”. His arms reach over to grab her and she makes a triumphant noise before he looks up at Buck.
“Hi.”
And he just sounds so dreamy he kinda wants to kick himself in the shin to get it together. But before he can start to overthink it more Buck just lets out a tiny breath before talking.
“Hey. You look good.”
Eddie does not blush. He does not. It’s just the sun heating up his skin.
“You look good too. Didn’t know you owned that suit.”
Buck just looks down at his feet and scratches the back of his neck. He’s smiling lightly before looks up again and replies.
“I didn’t. Maddie and I went shopping for today. She chose the color, actually.”
And Eddie sends a silent ‘thanks’ to Maddie in his head for that. And also a slight noise of indignation because Eddie was 0.3 seconds away from dropping down on his knees for an entirely different reason than proposing.
“Well, it’s a good color. On you. You work it.”
Eddie winces slightly and tries not to show the embarrassment in his face from what he just said. He’s gonna have to talk to May about not teaching him slang anymore.
Buck, to his credit, just smiles at that and doesn’t make a comment on the fact that Eddie just said ‘work it’ out loud.
“Well, that color looks good on you too. Though, you look good in everything, so it’s not surprising.”
And- is Buck flirting with him? Because Eddie might just faint right now. The air is so charged with… something, that Eddie feels it in his pores. He might need to take his jacket off because at this rate he’ll sweat like Niagara Falls.
But then the spell is broken when Jee slaps her hand against Eddie’s cheek. A loud ‘smack’ and giggles fill the air. And Eddie can’t help but laugh when he looks down at her, a frown on his face.
“Hey! What did I do?”
Jee just blows out her cheeks before she blows out a raspberry at him. He feels a few drops of saliva hit his face but he doesn’t mind. He just laughs louder than before at that.
“Oh, I see how it is.”
Eddie starts blowing raspberries on her skin in retaliation as she starts happily screaming at him because of it.
“Jee! Come here, let me save you from mean uncle Eddie.”
Buck tries to take her away from Eddie’s grasp, but fails when Eddie turns around before he can touch her.
“Uncle Buck doesn’t know that we are having a blast, right Jee?”
Jee-Yun just starts screaming louder at that.
“Hey! Give me my niece!”
Buck tries to grab her again, but Eddie starts walking away from him. His hold firm on Jee.
“No way, she wants to stay with me.”
At this point, the three of them are making a ruckus. He can feel eyes on them, but he doesn’t care. He’s way too happy right now to let that get to his head.
“Alright, alright. Hand over my daughter.”
Chim walks over to where the three of them are at before he starts to coo at Jee-Yun.
“Jee, why don’t you come with me so we can get you away from these two, huh? How does that sound?”
Jee-Yun looks slightly unconvinced and Eddie has to try and stifle his laugh at the face she making. Buck doesn’t try to push down his laugh though.
“Sorry, Chim. I think she prefers to be with us.”
The pride in Buck’s voice and the smile on his face as he says it only makes Chim scoff at him.
“Nuh-uh, miss. You are coming with me.”
Jee still looks reluctant before Maddie comes over to the four of them and Jee’s face lights up. She starts chanting “ma, ma, ma” as Maddie swoops in and takes Jee in her arms.
“What are you guys doing to my daughter?”
She asks with a teasing tone in her voice. She look down at Jee and smiles at her softly.
“We weren’t doing anything. We were just having fun.”
Buck emphasizes the ‘we’s and it makes Eddie want to tug on his jacket’s lapels and kiss him senseless.
“Mhmm. Well, everyone’s gonna start to take a seat, so why don’t you two go find your places and you can keep having fun with her later.”
Buck pouts slightly at that and Eddie just- he wants to marry him so bad, he’s going a little insane with it at this point.
“Fine. But I expect her back in my arms the second this is over.”
Buck dragging out the ‘i’ in ‘fine’ reminds Eddie of Chris earlier today when he was complaining about having to wear his suit’s jacket before giving in begrudgingly and saying “fiiiiine, I’ll wear it”. Eddie’s heart starts beating a mile per minute just from the thought of his boys being so alike.
Maddie just laughs as she starts walking away. Chim starts to turn around to follow her, but not before sending Eddie a look that speaks volumes. He just hopes Buck doesn’t pick up on it.
“Where are you sitting?”
Buck breaks Eddie out of his reverie before he has time to decipher Chim’s look. He looks back at his best friend before he shrugs.
“I have no idea. Figured I’d just sit wherever you were.”
And Buck… blushes? Eddie might be making it up but Buck might’ve just blushed at that?
Huh.
“I actually have to be over there to help out Hen and Karen with something. But we can sit together at the reception?”
There’s this look in Buck’s eyes that is a mix between hope and nervousness and Eddie just smiles reassuringly at him.
“Sure.”
Eddie tries to hide the disappointment at not being able to sit next to Buck, but he’s also giddy from just thinking about being next to Buck later.
They smile at each other for a few seconds longer before a throat clears behind them.
“Don’t you have to start arranging the entrance?”
Buck quickly turns around, wide eyed, at Athena before he coughs a little.
“Yeah. Yeah, I do. I’ll go do that now.”
And suddenly he’s no longer next to Eddie. He’s just left standing there looking at Athena before she chuckles.
“Boy, you’ve got it bad.”
And, ok. Eddie does blush now. But who wouldn’t when they are being stared down by Athena after she says something like that. He thinks he can be excused this one time.
Eddie tries to divert the conversation to something else before he blurts out that he loves Evan Buckley with his whole heart in the middle of the garden, surrounded by everyone in attendance of Hen and Karen’s vow renewals.
“Uh, where are you sitting?”
It’s the best he can come up with under her watchful eye. She just grins up at him before they walk over to where Bobby is waiting for her.
He sits behind the two of them and smiles at Bobby when he turns to look back at him.
“Nice to see you, Eddie.”
Eddie sits back and smiles at Bobby before saying.
“You too, Bobby.”
Once Athena sits down, she turns to whisper something in Bobby’s ear. Eddie watches as Bobby’s eyebrows rise all the way up into his hairline before he looks back at her. And then they are both looking back at Eddie. He just shifts in his seat, quirking up an eyebrow in silent question.
Athena just gives him a knowing look before Bobby speaks again.
“Glad you caught up.”
And Eddie just- he might tear up a little. Because they are Buck’s parents. More than his birth parents will ever be. And they are, more or less, giving him their blessing, which-
“Better late than never.”
Bobby’s smile just gets wider before he lightly nods his head at him. Eddie repeats the gesture, and then they look to the side when the music starts playing.
Eddie spots, in the distance, a light blue suit and what he thinks might be a clipboard. And he smiles at that. Because of course Buck wouldn’t let the opportunity of organizing something, with a clipboard in hand, go to waste.
So, Eddie sits back, and looks at Hen and Karen walk down the aisle, one by one, before the ceremony officially starts.
Out of the corner of his eye, he makes out a quick light blue blur go by and chuckles to himself. Buck probably sprinted back to his seat to properly watch their friends officially declare their love for each other again.
And Eddie just thinks that a few years down the line, that could be them too.