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Today was a typical Saturday afternoon. It was also one of Chuuya’s rare days off.
The sun was shining brightly down on the city streets as the Port Mafia executive strolled along the sidewalks.
This was it. The day he planned to purchase boxes full of lavish wine and hats. Then, when he got home, he would drink like there was no tomorrow.
Chuuya smiled and sighed happily.
Today was a once in a lifetime opportunity. Not only had Mori allowed him to take the day off, oh no, today was also paycheck day– meaning it was perfectly humane to splurge to his heart’s content.
His heart fluttered at the thought of opening a bottle of ‘89 in celebration the moment he returned home to his apartment.
Hell, today might actually be one of the best days of his life, but of course it wouldn’t top first place.
(The night Dazai vanished from the Port Mafia took the cake.)
Speaking of Dazai, Chuuya scowled. No, this is not the time to be thinking about that shitty bastard.
The orange-haired male nodded. That’s right! Today is a day of celebration. It’s not everyday that I get the luxury of having a day off.
He continued walking down the sidewalk, humming a tune he had mustered up.
Today is a day of celebration, meaning there is no work, no emos, and definitely no Daza-
Out of the corner of his eye, the male caught a glance of a lock of brown hair.
He froze.
No. Divert your attention, Chuuya. Just keep walking, it’s nothing, the male thought over and over continuously.
Unfortunately for him, his legs refused to budge.
Chuuya cursed underneath his breath for that one time he decided to skip leg day.
Okay. Maybe it’s just some random pedestrian. After all, brown is a common hair color! What are the chances that it’s actually him?
Upon that piece of information, Chuuya decided to turn his head to confirm his suspicions.
Unluckily enough, the odds happened to be against him.
Peering into the window of a small cafe was none other than Dazai Osamu.
☆☆☆
The tall brunette was so focused on staring into the cafe window that he hadn’t actually noticed his former partner.
“Oi! Why are you here?” Chuuya shouted, pointing at the male in bewilderment.
Dazai turned to look around and brought his index finger to his lips.
“Shh! Chuuya, why do you have to be so loud? They’ll notice!” he shushed.
“Who’s 'they?'”
“Look in the window.”
Chuuya walked over to Dazai and squinted inside at the humble cafe.
The shop was quiet and somewhat abandoned. It seemed that most of its customers had left as soon as brunch was over.
However, the ginger-haired male quickly spotted a pair of familiar faces.
There, seated in the middle of the shop, were Akutagawa… and the were-tiger?
Turning to the brunette, Chuuya asked, "Why are Akutagawa and the man-tiger sitting together in an almost empty cafe?"
"That's right! That's what I asked myself too! I didn't expect you to be the observant type, Chuuya!" Dazai exclaimed, nodding to himself.
"You-"
"Shh! Look! They just ordered their food!" Dazai cut him off.
He reached forward and yanked Chuuya's face, forcibly making the executive turn his attention back to the window.
Together, they watched as the waitress standing by Akutagawa and Atsushi's table left, allowing the two to engage in some idle chatter.
Dazai squinted his eyes and glared at his former subordinate.
"Tsk." He clicked his tongue, clearly annoyed.
"When did Akutagawa and the man-tiger get so friendly?" Chuuya remarked nonchalantly.
He turned to look at Dazai, who was still sending a spiteful glare towards Akutagawa.
"Oi, answer my question, shitty mackerel."
Dazai let out an exasperated sigh. "A few weeks ago. Sadly, you weren't as observant as I thought."
"Bastar-"
Dazai cut him off again, continuing, "I noticed it a while ago back at the Agency. Intrigued, I inputted a tracker on Atsushi-kun's cell phone."
"You're a creep."
"Shut up. I was concerned about why my sweet Atsushi-kun had been acting so corrupted."
"Corrupted? The were-tiger?"
"Yesterday, he declined to come run some errands with me today! So, I decided to put that tracker to good use! And what do I find? My sweet Atsushi-kun on a date with that nasty Port Mafia's rabid dog!" Dazai cried out.
"No, I agree with the man-tiger. Who in the right mind would want to hang out with you?"
Dazai paused to stare at Chuuya for a long minute.
"What?"
"Well, you're technically hanging out with me right now, Chuuya."
"Shut up! This was against my will! I wanted to spend the day buying wine but I just had to run into you instead, you suicidal manic!" Chuuya shouted, clearly flustered.
Dazai groaned and covered his ears. "There you go, rambling about your vintage wine again."
"My day was going perfectly fine! I even spotted an exquisite hat for sale two shops over!"
Dazai continued covering his ears. "What? I can't hear you!" he sang teasingly.
Chuuya let out a shout and kicked his former partner.
Unfortunately for him, Dazai jumped away in time (as per usual).
"I can't stand your attitude!" the ginger exclaimed.
"And I can't stand your taste in shoes either!" Dazai replied, blowing him a raspberry.
The detective shifted his attention back to the window, with Chuuya yelling at him in the background.
By now, many pedestrians walking by had given the pair a look of confusion and concern.
The waitress serving Shin Soukoku's table had returned, placing down two plates of waffles and two cups of green tea.
"So Akutagawa's a waffle person…" Dazai muttered, lost in thought.
"Hah? What are you talking about?"
"I'm surprised you heard me from down there, shorty."
"You little piece of shit-" Chuuya began, starting to activate his ability.
"We don't have time for this right now." Dazai retorted, immediately grabbing his arm and disabling it.
Chuuya let out another strand of insults, with Dazai ignoring him again.
The brunette's attention was once again fixated on the cafe window.
He let out a horrified gasp.
Inside the small shop, Atsushi was feeding his "secret" lover a piece of his waffle.
"Are you seeing this right now?" Dazai shouted, pointing at the window in shock.
"Yeah, and so what? Just let the two lovebirds be, Dazai." Chuuya rolled his eyes.
"I'm going to call Akutagawa to get away from Atsushi-kun, right now."
The detective pulled out his phone.
"Oh, don't you dare ruin the moment, you stickler-for-bandages!" The Port Mafia executive yelled, reaching for him.
Too late. Dazai had already hit the call button.
Inside the cafe, Akutagawa's phone rang, ruining the moment between the lovers.
"Dazai, you are horrible." was all Chuuya said, as he and his former partner watched the exchange happen from the window.
Akutagawa looked down at his phone and then to Atsushi. He was mouthing something along the lines of, "Dazai-san" and "call."
Upon hearing this, Atsushi had appeared to roll his eyes in annoyance. The platinum blonde then grabbed Akutagawa's phone and ended the call.
The two lovers continued eating as if nothing happened.
Dazai watched with a look of distraught. He could not believe what he just witnessed. His own subordinate, no, not even Akutagawa, had refused to answer him.
"He- Atsushi-kun… He-" the brunette stuttered.
"Oi, use your words now." Chuuya said, rolling his eyes. "You're sounding like a grade school kid."
"Atsushi-kun just cancelled my call! Look at how corrupted he's become! It's all Akutagawa's fault!" Dazai cried.
"How is it Akutagawa's fault?"
"Atsushi-kun's dating a bad influence!" The detective protested, storming inside the cafe.
"Hey, what are you doing?"
"Giving Akutagawa a piece of my mind!"
"Oi! Wait a minute!"
Chuuya ran after the detective, desperately trying to hold him back.
But, it was too late. Akutagawa and Atsushi had already spotted Dazai.
Thus, the suicidal maniac from the detective agency had managed to ruin Shin Soukoku's date, with Chuuya in the background, throwing heaps of insults at him.
☆☆☆
In a darker corner of the cafe sat another member of the Armed Detective Agency and a member of The Guild.
"Do you think they see us?" Edgar Allan Poe whispered nervously. He removed the strawberry on his cake and plopped it on his boyfriend's plate.
"Nah, I doubt they do," Ranpo replied, immediately shoving the said strawberry into his mouth.
Poe turned to look at his secret lover. "Speaking of which, when did you figure out about them?"
The Guild member pointed at Akutagawa and Atsushi.
"Long time ago— I knew before Dazai knew."
"How?"
The male glanced at his boyfriend and smiled. "Elementary, my dear Poe, elementary."
"As expected from a great detective."