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Grian leapt into the air, wings snapping out behind him to push past gravity and send him soaring. Grinning, he did a few tricks, looping and rolling, diving and twirling around.
“Coming up with a new dance routine, up there?” Glancing down towards the yell, Grian slowed to a glide, a bit breathless.
“Maybe. What are you doing up here, Scar? I thought you were working on your sanctuary?” Scar was too far below for Grian to properly see his reaction, but he seemed to deflate a little at the innocent question.
“Ah, I was just curious! You looked like you were having fun, is all. I also have something for you.” Humming, Grian folded his wings to dive down, catching himself a few feet before he landed. Scar was smiling, but it didn’t reach the emotion hidden in his eyes.
Grian tilted his head, frowning faintly. “Are you okay, Scar? You look a bit… sad.”
“Yeah… yeah, I’m okay! Just- I made you these.” Scar rummaged in his inventory for a moment, pulling out a batch of chocolate chip cookies. Grian raised his eyebrows, but before he could say anything, Scar looked up. His expression was enough for him to keep his own mouth shut.
“I… well, I thought you could use them. You know, for your ‘secret’.” Grian felt the air escape his chest, frozen as Scar took his hands, placing the batch in them with a broken smile. Just like the ones he gave away.
It felt like a goodbye, and Grian didn’t know what to do. When had he found out? Had he watched Grian? How else would he know about the cookies? Void, he felt like an absolute jerk, now. What had he done?
“I’m sure he’ll like them, don’t you?”
Scar stepped back, already turning away, not even expecting an answer. Grian finally started breathing again, catching Scar’s wrist before he could leave. “Wait- Scar.”
Their base descended into silence as Scar turned back to look at him, and Grian felt a piece of his heart fissure at the hidden hurt on his face. “Why- you- I don’t understand. Are you… leaving?”
“No- I’ll be here.” The waiting for you was unsaid, and Grian realized how hard Scar had been trying this whole time to keep Grian close, while he was off flirting with their competitors. He looked down at the cookies, still warm and soft, and let go of Scar’s wrist squeezing his hand instead.
“And- you made these yourself? Just for me?”
“Well, yeah. It’s a gift.” For him was also silent, but Grian is good at reading between the lines. How had he been so blind before? Of course Scar would be upset. Of course he would be hurt. Guilt stabbed Grian in the gut, and he grimaced, hating how Scar’s hand rested limply in his. He’d never seen Scar this way, and it killed him that he was the reason for it.
“Well, in that case, we can share them, yeah? I’ll- we can have a picnic with your pandas, and-“ Grain stopped his desperate attempt to fill the silence as Scar started laughing, a small, joyless sound. It sent cracks through his chest, like a diamond pickaxe on obsidian. That wasn’t how Scar was supposed to sound.
“Grain, you… I don’t want you to hang out with me just because you feel obligated to. So, just- don’t. Please.”
“Scar, I- I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry- I shouldn’t have treated you like this. Void, what have I done?” Grain dropped the cookies in his inventory carefully, reaching over to take Scar’s other hand, looking him in the eyes. Scar still wouldn’t hold his hands back, and void, if that wasn’t the cherry on top of this trainwreck?
Scar looked away, smile faltering, but Grian just turned his head back carefully, keeping a hold on his hands. It was a bit awkward, but Grian couldn’t risk him running away. Funny, how he was the one running, before. How the tables turn.
“Scar, look at me. Please? I- I want to make this right. Properly.” Shifting a bit, Scar complied, not quite meeting his eyes. It was close enough, though it hurt to think of why he couldn’t meet his eyes.
Taking a deep breath, Grain frowned seriously. He needed to apologize. Scar deserved that much.
“Scar. I’ve been a bad friend, and a worse soulmate, and I’m sorry. I was upset because you have a history of dying easily, and since our life-force is bonded together, I- well… I didn’t want to die so soon, I guess. It’s stupid, I know, but- I… I should have known better than to treat you differently just because you get hurt easier.
“I should have been protecting you, not trying to control you, and then attempting to leave you for someone else! You have every right to be angry, and upset, and you don’t ever have to forgive me-“ Scar finally met his eyes, and Grian stopped, trying to calm down the wave of emotions in his chest- guilt, despair, fear. Hope. It was almost suffocating. Scar sighed, holding up their intertwined hands and studying the matching scars, nicks and calluses.
“Grain- End, I don’t know what to say. I’m- I don’t think I can forgive you right now. But, I… don’t want to lose you, either. Just, give me- us, our friendship- another chance?” Grian breathed out slowly at the tired edge in Scar’s voice, and pulled him in for a hug, unshed tears threatening to choke him.
“Yeah, of course I will. If anything, you should be giving me a second chance, stupid. You’re- you’re too nice.” A soft laugh rumbled against his ribs, and Grian smiled faintly, resting his forehead on Scar’s shoulder as he felt arms carefully return his embrace, avoiding his wings and squeezing gently.
“Only to my friends. I’d say you’re lucky, but I don’t think I could ever hate you, you know. Just- don’t do that again? It didn’t feel great, Grain.”
“Ugh, not that nickname! I guess I deserve it, though, huh… I- I won’t break your trust in me again, Scar, I promise. If I do, I’ll give you three quarters of all my future riches and legally change my name to Grain.”
This time, they both laughed, and Scar rested his head on top of Grian’s. Grian could only imagine the smile on Scar’s face, as he spoke. “I’ll hold you to that. Now, what were you saying about a picnic with my Jellies?”
Grian pulled back from the hug, grabbing Scar’s hand and smiling as the man finally intertwined their fingers, pulling him down into their base.
“Well, I have a few old blankets to sit on, and I was thinking we could make some sandwiches and slice up some watermelon? Oh! We can also make some lemonade, and maybe some soup? I guess there’s also steak and potatoes-“
“Whoa, that’s a lot- are we feeding the Jellies too or what?” Grian huffed, smacking Scar lightly as they finally made it to their storage area, keeping hold of his hand as he looked in every chest, pulling various items out: bottles, bowls, mushrooms, different kinds of meat, the list goes on.
He looked up when Scar lightly squeezed his hand, smiling at the happy yet baffled expression on his face. “Are you actually going to feed the Jellies with all this? We won’t be able to eat a quarter of it, Grian!”
“It’s the thought that counts, though! Go big or go home!”
“Ugh, fine, but let me carry some of that for you- your inventory is going to overflow!”
Setting up a picnic in Scar’s panda sanctuary was harder than expected: every minute or so, one of the Jellies would get too close and rumple up the blanket, or stand on a chest so they couldn’t get in it, just being little nuisances. Eventually, Scar lured them away with bamboo and let Grian finish setting everything up.
When he came back, they settled down and constructed their own ridiculous sandwiches, seeing who could make the most horrendous lunch. Scar won by putting half a stack of seeds in his sandwich, accompanied by an actual clump of dirt.
“Scar, that’s- no! Don’t eat it, stop stop stop, you win! That’s horrendous!”
“Well now it just feels like a waste, Grian! What am I supposed to eat if I don’t eat my seedy sandwich?”
“I don’t know, a steak? Maybe some pork? Some of the cookies you made?”
“But I made the cookies for you! And this already has steak in it. I’ll just-“
“NO!”
Scar’s sandwich was buried, and the picnic went well after that.
Grian couldn’t remember the last time he laughed so much, and Scar finally looked happy. They may not have much time left, and of course they still needed to fix things, but it felt good to just exist, for a little while. And who knows? Maybe they’d win, maybe they’d lose, but at least they’d be doing it as soulmates should: together.