Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Epilogue... (two years later)

Chapter Text

A letter on a formal letter head featuring two hands joined by a string with red hearts. Red String of Fate Matchmaking Agency is written on the header. From:

Dr Marshall Rose, CEO
Red String of Fate Matchmaking Agency
520 Blushing St, New Love
Auckland
1072

Dear Coveted Customer,

Here at Red String of Fate Matchmaking Agency we offer you the cutting edge of scientific breakthroughs in love and connection with the simple, old-world feel of pen and paper.

It's our mission to help you find your soulmate! Using our patented Red String technology, we guarantee success in your romantic endeavours and promise a lasting connection that will fuel your heart for years to come.

Past clients have provided testimonials such as:

This service changed my life. - Isla, 35

I was considering joining the cast of The Bachelor but I found Red String instead! - Lucy, 23

After my wife left me, I was sure I would be alone forever. That's when I joined Red String and found my soulmate, Sarah. - Jeff, 54

If, like our customers, you're looking for that perfect connection that will stay with you for life, look no further. Complete the form attached, mail it to our office and await a letter from your soulmate. It's that easy!

Warm regards,

Dr Marshall Rose, CEO

An empty form on matching letterhead.

ABOUT YOU

Name:

Gender:

Age:

Address:

Occupation:

Interests:

Please attach high quality photo of you.

ABOUT YOUR SOULMATE

Gender:

Age:

Interests:

Appearance:

Please include in envelope $20 cash for processing fee

Stede's journal:

Monday 10th July

This has to be a scam right? I mean the address is a dead giveaway! Plus so few details and they expect to find me the one? I just can't believe that this would actually work?? Not even my date of birth! They won't know I'm a Leo and I feel like that's the kind of thing matchmakers care about...

But I guess what's the worst that can happen? I lost $20? Small price to pay for a chance of (guaranteed) happiness? HA!

Completed form:

ABOUT YOU

Name: Stede Bonnet

Gender: Male

Age: Thirty-Five

Address: 242 Brooker Grove, Newlands, 6037

Occupation: Museum curator (specialising in bug specimen)

Interests: Reading, history, bugs, I also like hikes?

ABOUT YOUR SOULMATE

Gender: Woman

Age: 30-something

Interests: Learning new things, exploring... I'd like someone to be able to share my passions with and who can find joy in nature like me

Appearance: Other people have specific requests about this? I guess... a nice smile?

Attached is a photo of Stede wearing glasses.

Letter on Red Strings letterhead.

Dear Stede Bonnet,

Thank you for completing our application process and submitting your payment of $20NZD. Your details will be forwarded to our matchmaking specialists to find your perfect match! In the meantime, consider the attached pamphlet of material including "20 Questions To Ask Your Future Soulmate".

We at Red Strings of Fate believe that conversation via the medium of letters is the perfect way to get to know someone and we hope that these questions will help you form those lasting connections!

Sit tight, and keep an eye out in the mail for a letter from your beloved. They will be excited to hear back from you!

Warm regards,
Rosie McGinty
Head of Matchmaking

Letter on Red Strings letterhead.

20 Questions To Ask Your Future Soulmate

1. What's something you're glad you'll never have to do again?
2. What would you do with your life if you suddenly were awarded a billion dollars?
3. Do you believe everything happens for a reason, or do we just find reasons after things happen?
4. Is there anything you consider absolutely unforgiveable?
5. If you woke up tomorrow with no fear, what would you do first?
6. In your life, what has been the biggest blessing in disguise?
7. If you could pick one year of your life to do-over, which would it be and why?
8. If you could write a note to your younger self, what would you say in only three words?
9. What is the one thing that make you feel alive?
10. What would your perfect day look like?
11. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
12. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?
13. What's your favourite karaoke song?
14. When was the last time you cried and why?
15. What is your happiest memory?
16. What's the best gift you've ever received?
17. If you had to lsiten to just one of the songs you loved as a kid for the rest of your life, which song would it be?
18. How did your last relationship end?
19. How long was your longest relationship?
20. What is on your bucket list that we could do together?

An open blank envelope...

Inside, a letter that reads:

176 Berkshire Avenue
Wadestown, 6012

Dear Future Lover,

Sometimes, I think I'm drowning.

Not literally, I'm not underwater right now, but the metaphor exists so I'm using it. The constant pressure of living up to what everyone expects of me... The muffled sounds of everyone's demands... I just want to switch off and be free of it all...

Maybe writing this letter is the first step on my journey to finding myself or some other new age crap...

Maybe I just need somewhere to vent.

Cheers,

Your Future Lover, Ed

Sketched on the bottom of the page is a doodle of a skull...

Stede's journal:

Wednesday 19th July

I don't know what's happening but somehow today I received my soulmate letter? But the envelope was blank... my address wasn't anywhere to be found? Did they drop it at my house?? How creepy!

He doesn't seem creepy though... He seems... very genuine.

And that's another thing! Didn't I write "women" on my form? I mean, maybe the agency knows me better than I know myself? They're meant to know a thing or two about soulmates, I guess...

A letter from Stede:

Dear Ed,

Drowning is not an unfamiliar feeling to me...

I don't like to dwell on it much, but I certainly have spent my fair share of time sitting in the shower wishing I'd turn to goo and disappear down the drain.

I guess that's why I signed up for this damn thing... I'm sick of feeling lonely...

Tell me something about yourself. I have a list of questions ready beside me but maybe we should start with an easy one:

What do you do for work?

I'll start - I'm a museum curator and I specialise in bugs. Eggs, larvae, pupae, insects. Earthworms, butterflies, beetles. I love them all. I will say, maggots are a bit stinky, but they're kind of cute in their own way and are important for the ecosystem.

Excited to hear from you.

Yours,
Stede

A letter from Ed:

Hi Stede,

What a surprise to hear from you! I've never had a penpal before but hi! What do I do? I'm a sailor, part of a small crew of sustainable fishermen. I'm mostly in charge of the boat, not the fishing, but sometimes I get to bring home some beauties. I've caught a few sea bugs in my time, have you got any of those in your collection?

Tell me, how old are you? I'm 38, but I tell the crew I'm 50 so they take me seriously. I drink them under the table like I'm 25 though, so jokes on them.

Cheers,
Ed

A letter from Stede:

Dear Ed,

You had the best timing with your letter; we just received some sea bug specimens for display from the aquarium this week! I'll be thinking of you when I label them tomorrow.

What's your favourite fish dish? Is there something that the crew likes to eat on their journeys?

I just turned 36 actually, so happy birthday to me? I can't say I hold my liquor well at all, but alas.

And shall I ask one of the tough questions?

What's something you're glad you'll never have to do again?

Yours,
Stede

Stede's journal:

Tuesday 1st August

The agency didn't tell him my age? That seems a bit of an administrative error... Maybe he didn't give them an age preference...

A letter from Ed:

Morning Stede,

Might not be morning when you get this, but it's morning when I'm writing it so it counts. Most importantly - HAPPY BIRTHDAY. Officially joining us in late 30's land. It's a fun place! Did you get any good gifts?

I'm guessing if you've been given the bugs they're no good for eating? You'll have to splurge on one some time. Better than lobster in my opinion! Might just be one of my favourite dishes, but hard to choose and technically not a fish.

Re: the tough question... Hm... You really did pick a toughy. I've been struggling with it since I got your letter. Easy answer, school. Hated it, glad to be rid of it.

But I think if I'm being entirely truthful, there are parts of school I missed. The fact you were forced to make friends just because they were there? Wish life was more like that sometimes. You make "friends" at sea, but it's not quite the same. You've got to have each others backs in case something dire happens, but everyone carries their own problems and shit. And out here, it's very easy to feel alone even with the crew.

A question for you though, mate: favourite land bug?

Cheers,
Ed

A letter from Stede:

Dear Ed,

I was excited to receive a reply from you, and it does happen to be morning when I'm reading this, the postman just came! My mum took me out to dinner which was... awkward to say the least, but I got a good meal out of it. I took cupcakes to work to share, and that was fun. No gifts, but I did splurge and buy myself a new watch. That felt like an appropriate late 30's gift to me. Maybe I'll find a restaurant that serves bugs and call that a second gift.

I miss school so badly sometimes. Not the shitty parts obviously, but you're right, there's something special about friendships where you're forced to hang out everyday. Coworkers just aren't quite the same, hey. Do you still talk to your school friends after all these years?

My favourite land bug is the rosy maple moth, dryocampa rubicunda. A stunning specimen! The one in our collection is especially beautiful, if I do say so myself.

Since that deep question was a bit of a downer, how about something happier this time? What's something that really makes you feel alive?

Yours,
Stede

A letter from Ed:

Sorry Stede,

I only have time for a quick reply this morning, we're heading out for three weeks today, so it might take a while for me to write again. Would you have guessed I don't talk to any of my high school mates? Right load of tossers they are. Glad to be rid of them.

What brings me joy? The fresh sea air on day 1 of voyage, before my lips are chapped and my nose won't stop running... (but also seeing the mail has arrived). Looking forward to your next letter.

Cheers,
Ed

Appended to this letter is a sketch of a moth.

Stede's journal:

Thursday 24th August

He gets joy from the post arriving? From my- No, as if. There's plenty of cool things that come in the mail. Magazine subscriptions, online orders... Everyone gets a bit of a thrill when the postman comes, right?

A letter from Stede:

Dear Ed,

Hopefully your journey was an enjoyable and fruitful one! And hopefully if I haven't procrastinated writing this too long, it will be waiting for your return.

I don't really talk to my school friends either. I say as if there were a bunch of them. But still, we've all gone our separate ways basically. How weird is that, that you spend so much time crammed together, making the most of a bad situation with people, and then the situation is gone and suddenly you're all free and you never talk again...

Oh no, I'm bringing the tone of everything down again. Sorry, the loneliness has really been getting to me lately.

I didn't tell you something that makes me feel alive... I think it might be writing these letters to you...

What would you do if you suddenly got a billion dollars?

Yours,
Stede

A letter from Ed:

Hey Stede,

Back from sea and boy was I glad to see your letter. It's always nice to have a conversation not about fish or ropes or sails or nets or... you get the gist. A billion dollars you say... hmmmmm... I think I would buy a bigger boat.

Tell me what luxury item you'd be acquiring. A one-of-a-kind specimen maybe? No, don't tell me. Stede Bonnet would solve world hunger. I mean, I could probably do that with my big boat too...

Cheers,
Ed

Appended to this letter is a sketch of a boat, with a comment reading "a rather small boat".

Stede's journal:

Tuesday 5th September

RED ALERT. RED ALERT. He was glad to see my letter... Is that not the most romantic thing you've ever heard? How do I tell him that my heart was pumping out my chest when I saw the mail arrive? I don't want to come on too strong. But... he's my soulmate right?

A letter from Stede:

Dear Ed,

It was so lovely to receive your letter. It's good to know you're safely home. World peace sounds like a great idea, we could definitely use your boat to solve world hunger. We might need a slightly larger boat than the one you drew though.

I've been asking you so many of the hard questions - just following the homework of course! - but I realised I don't even know what you look like... That's weird, right? I'd imagined us sailing your billion dollar boat but I couldn't imagine you properly... Tell me about yourself!

For reference, as you probably noticed in my photo, I've got glasses and at the moment, a solid amount of stubble but I'm thinking of shaving it all off soon. In summer I'm blonde, but I haven't seen enough sun yet.

And the big question of the day:

If you could write a short note to your younger self, what would it be?

Yours,
Stede

A letter from Ed:

Stede,

If I could write a note to my younger self it would say this: It'll work out.

Photo of me attached, nice comments only.

Also I never got your photo, can you send it again?

Ed

Attached is a photo of Ed, smiling and looking slightly off camera. He is wearing a beanie.

A letter from Stede:

Oh Ed,

Why do I keep managing to ask the questions that seem to hurt? I promise I'm not planning it that way! "AS questions to get to know your penpal better," they said. "It'll be great for establishing connections," they said.

Happy to avoid the childhood topics for ever and ever. But if it makes you feel any better, I would probably tell younger me the same thing.

I don't know why you didn't get my photo... Very strange. I've printed another copy and included it here for you. Though I don't think I could possibly live up to the handsome standard you've set!

Yours,
Stede x

Attached is a duplicate photo of that attached to Stede's initial applicaiton form. He is wearing glasses and a red bow tie over a denim shirt.

Stede's journal:

Monday 18th September

God, he's gorgeous. I guess the agency really were right when they paired us. Though why they didn't pass on my photo, I have no idea. NOTE TO SELF: no more childhood talk. Positive vibes only.

A letter from Ed:

Dear Stede,

Um, mate, I don't know what you're talking about re: you. I will be keeping this photo in my wallet forever, thanks.

I don't mind talking about tough topics with you. I know I'm in safe hands.

Maybe it's my turn to ask a tough question. What do you think happens to us when we die?

Ed x

Appended is a doodle of a person, with a note reading "me, admiring your photo (the drawing is so crappy coz I'm distracted)

Stede's journal:

Thursday 28th September

He replied. He's keeping the photo. He doesn't hate the way I look. In fact he might... like it?

A letter from Stede:

Dear Ed,

Thank you for trusting me with your vulnerability (and not saying anything mean about my photo). I'll cherish it forever.

When we die? The scientific part of me is convinced we just... die. That's it. Nothing. But I also didn't think before this that I believed in soulmates either so? And if soulmates are real, the idea of death being the end is... painfully sad.

What do you believe happens to us when we die?

Also favourite song?

Yours,
Stede x

A letter from Ed:

Dear Stede,

Are you telling me you don't think you're handsome? Are we looking at the same photo mate? I trust you to the end of the earth on anything but this topic, because clearly you're delusional. (Also don't shave the beard yet, I want an update when it turns blonde).

In my culture, the spirit continues on after death. All the vital parts of our spirit carry on. Definitely better than any of this "just dead" nonsense.

Also asking me to choose my favourite song is just cruel. Too many factors. Best live performance? That time Lindsay Buckingham played Big Love acoustic. Best single? Crowded House's Fall At Your Feet. But also ask me tomorrow and my answers will probably be different.

But very solid question. What's yours?

Ed x

Appended to this letter is a series of doodles. A guitar, a guitar amp, a set of over-ear headphones and a tape cassette.

A letter from Stede:

Dear Ed,

Have I mentioned before how much I enjoy your little doodles? I feel thoroughly spoiled by your most recent letter.

I needed it too, today has been absolutely horrible. I got into a bit of a... verbal altercation with a coworker who'd messed up my specimen preparation with his carelessness. It put me on edge for the rest of the day, and then I nearly was in an accident on the drive home. I was totally shaken up, but getting your letter brightened everything. It let a bit of you be here with me, even just for a moment.

Your understand of death makes me feel hopeful. I want that.

To make myself feel better tonight, I've been listening to ABBA. Is it a guilty pleasure? I don't feel too guilty about it to be honest.

Wishing you were here,
Stede x

Stede's journal:

Wednesday 4th October

That was too much wasn't it...

A letter from Ed:

I know it's been a few days and everything is probably behind you by now, but I really do hope you're alright. I'm glad I could help, even if I didn't actually... y'know... do anything. Feel free to tell me all about it. Full vent. Shitty coworkers and all. I'm all ears. Or eyes...

And if it's any consolation, your letters are the bright spot of my week, every damn time. Especially when my first mate is being a pain in my ass. It's the best to talk to someone who's not a right royal dick. Best conversations I have.

Also ABBA is no one's guilty pleasure. It's just pure please, mate.

Yours, Ed x

Appended is a doodle of three love hearts.

Stede's journal:

Saturday 14th October

Are those hearts?? Did he mean those?? Or are they just his normal casual doodles?? I did say I loved his doodles... Oh no and now I've gone and said doodle too many times. Shit.

A letter from Stede:

Dear Ed,

Work has been better since my last letter. Thank you for thinking of me. The shitty co-worker is only shitty sometimes, really. I just have grand plans for the exhibit and he has no plans whatsoever and a knack to act without thinking and our specimens are very delicate and we really only get one shot at preserving things and... I'm getting carried away.

Tell me about your shitty coworker! I'm interested in that gossip... I can only imagine things are worse when you're on extended trips. When's your next one of those?

We should probably also get back to the deep and meaningful questions... How about a double whammy?

How long was your longest relationship? And how did it end?

Yours,
Stede x

A letter from Ed:

Dear Stede,

Our next long haul is coming up very soon (we'll be gone for a whole month). Please respond with the longest letter ever so I can take it with me and read it every day.

And dear, I don't mind you getting carried away. Get carried away all you want, I want to hear it. I will proceed to also get carried away, right now, complaining about Izzy. You start it, just saying!

Izzy is the bane of my existence right now. First mate, essential part of my crew. Really, the bulk of my crew that isn't fisherman. Obviously, everybody helps out when I need it, but Izzy is supposed to be my man on the boat, doing exactly what I say and making sure everything gets done right. You know, I'm the Captain, that's how these things go. But he's been real snarky lately. Doesn't want to do what I say, complains I'm riding him too hard or that I'm not paying attention to the ocean. I'm paying attention to the ocean PLENTY mate. He told me my hearts not in it anymore and.... hey maybe that's true. Maybe sailing doesn't give me the joy it used to. Or at least, it doesn't feel like enough anymore.

Damn, my longest relationship. That was so long ago it feels like a fever dream. Hook ups on dating apps don't count right?? I think he and I dated for maybe six months. We were young, fucking like rabbits. It was easy and fun, but we never talked like you and I talk. We ended it when I took up the Captaincy... When everything was less convenient, I guess. That's really all I'm good for anyway, in a relationship. What about you?

Your
Ed x

Stede's journal:

Tuesday 24th October

Too many things in Ed's last letter to freak out about! I'm losing my mind. He called me dear?? YOUR ED?? He compared us to his longest relationship?? Positively?? He fucks???

A letter from Stede:

Dear Ed,

A long letter you say? Guess I'll just have to drop every though I've ever had here for your perusal. Remember: you asked for this. I am definitely going to get carried away...

Firstly, Izzy sounds like a right asshole. It's clear the two of you have sailed together for a while, but he seems to have made it his mission to make it absolutely miserable for the both of you! He better step up his game.

On the topic of joy... I've been thinking about this a lot, just in the back of my mind. Work has always brought me joy as well, but somehow, even though I'm doing something that I love, that doesn't stop me from feeling lonely, or restless, or adrift (boat metaphor intentional, you're welcome). I'm sure a therapist might have told me once that we seek fulfillment in all avenues of life... Anyway, that's my excuse, feel free to borrow it!

On the dating front, my life has thus far been rather boring, I'm afraid. Longest crush might be more apt of a question. I've tried the dating apps, going out to bars etc, and I never seemed to click with anybody in any kind of deep way. Then again, I always had my settings on "interested in women" so maybe that's a factor... So to answer the question as accurately as possible I'd say... three weeks? (And I was hoping to break it off after the first, but I couldn't bring myself to say it.)

Geez, a whole month... I'm thinking ahead of myself now, but what am I going to do without my regular letters from you? You'll be busy sailing and I'll be pinning moths... It sounds very lame when I put it like that... Your adventures will be so much more exciting than whatever I get up to, so I expect some thrilling updates in your next letter.

I've attached some more photos of me. Very stupid idea of mine but I thought maybe you could take them with you, and then I'd be on the boat, kind of, with you... You can tell in the left one I've gotten a bit omre sun lately (and proof I haven't ditched the stubble yet). The other is an older one I thought you might appreciate. Feel free to also ignore them entirely, if it's a bit weird.

All this to say, Ed, that I'm going to miss you. Don't do anything rash, like dying or... Never mind.

Yours,
Stede x

Appended to the letter is two photos. In the first, Stede (recent) looks directly at the camera wearing a floral patterned shirt. In the second, a younger Stede Bonnet looks away from the camera with his arms crossed.

A letter from Ed:

Stede,

I haven't read your letter yet. I'm gonna save it til I'm on the ocean, when the loneliness kicks in. I'm gonna miss you.

Ed x

Stede's journal:

Wednesday 1st November

Fuck. I miss him already.

A letter from Ed:

Dear Stede,

I've read your letter too many times now, it's practically falling apart in my pocket. Whoops. Got any tape?

I've also been thinking about all the things you mentioned. Izzy, boat life. I've had different replies ready to go at different stages of the trip, but now that I'm home and I have a few weeks on land in front of me, they seem like a thing of the past. Izzy is a dick, we're all aware, but any day to day grievances I had with him are over now anyway.

On the topic of joy though: you got me with that one. It's been on my mind non-stop. What brings me joy, what I want to pursue, what I want to value and put my effort into. Many thoughts have been had.

I'm kind of surprised to hear you've mainly been going for girls. But hey, I clearly haven't been lucky in love either, it's no biggie.

No thrilling updates about the sail unfortunately. Everything went rather according to plan on that front. But I do have some photos for you, to pay you back for the stunners you sent me. The blond scruff is really something, mate.

Your Ed x

Appended to this letter are three photos of Ed, close to glamour shots. Two looking into the camera, one lying down, arm thrown over head, smiling away from the camera, very flirty.

Stede's journal:

Thursday 30th November

I may just pass out. Can he get any more attractive? This feels obscene.

A letter from Stede:

Dear Ed,

God, it's so good to hear from you. I think I went stir crazy just listening to myself think these past few weeks. You think your sail was uneventful, you should have seen the museum. The highlight of my month was an orange-coloured copper moth. Very pretty, but nothing rare, to say the least. I'm still curious about what happened with Izzy though...

Wow, re: the photos. More than pays me back for the couple I pulled together, this looks like you planned a whole photoshoot! You look really happy in these photos, Ed. I might have to start a collection.

Deep and meaningful question of the day:

In your life, what has been the biggest blessing in disguise?

Yours,
Stede x

A letter from Ed:

Dear Stede,

Please attach picture of orange-coloured copper moth to your next letter. You say they're common, I say, mate I spend more time on the ocean than on land, I don't see that many moths.

Izzy, well... Yeah, the boys were giving me shit about you. All the time I spent mooning over your letters and photos and everything. Izzy was mad about it, hardly talked to me the whole trip, but the fishing boys thought it was hilarious, so that made up for it. I think it made them see me as a real person, not just captain, which was nice. Then Fang set up the whole photoshoot thing while we were a little drunk one night. So, all for you, I guess.

Biggest blessing in disguise? Getting that first letter from you, mate. Next question!

Your Ed x

Appended to the letter is a small doodle of leaves.

Stede's journal:

Monday 11th December

What does that mean?? I'm his biggest blessing in disguise?? I've read this whole letter ten times and I'm still no closer to finding clarity. I'm a ball of heat. Excuse me while I combust.

A letter from Stede:

Dear Ed,

Picture attached, as requested. He sure is a pretty little thing, even if they're a dime a dozen. Not as pretty as you though.

I'm glad you're finding joys at sea. Breaking down barriers between the fishermen and the crew (sans Izzy of course, but screw that guy). If it wasn't obvious from my last letter, I like seeing you happy. It makes me happy.

You make me happy...

Here's your next question, Ed: If you woke up tomorrow with no fear, what would you do first?

Yours,
Stede x

Appended to this letter is a polaroid shot of the orange-coloured copper moth, Lycaena salustius, dated 2019.

A letter from Ed:

Dear Stede,

That moth sure is a stunner (but not as pretty as you).

We can talk for hours about what makes me happy. The ocean, friendship, cool moths. Stede, what makes me happy is you.

Also, bold of you to assume I feel fear. But you know what, if that ever could possibly happen (I'm not saying it could, but if it did), I'd probably shoot my shot with you.

Sorry, I'm shameless today, something must have come over me.

Your Ed x

Stede's journal:

Wednesday 20th December

What the fuck. What the fuck. What the fuck. WHAT THE FUCK.

An unsent letter from Stede:

Dear Ed,

Consider your shot shot. Shooted?

Another unsent letter from Stede:

Dear Ed,

There's no reason to be afraid

A letter from Stede:

Dear Ed,

Don't you know by now that's not a shot you need to risk taking? I'm in. I've been in for ages. I think that kind of comes with the soulmate territory.

Tell me, what would your perfect day look like? Right now, mine would be a picnic with you. I'd pack us something delicious, scones and marmalade or something. We'd watch the birds and I'd point out the different bug species for you and you'd tell me all about the ocean and places you want to go...

I think that would be perfect.

Yours,
Stede x

A letter from Ed:

Stede,

Meet me at the botanic gardens on Saturday 30th at sunset.

Your Ed x

Stede's journal:

Friday 29th December

Meeting Ed tomorrow! Meeting Ed tomorrow! MEETING ED TOMORROW!!!!!

A letter from Mary:

Hi Stede,

My name is Mary Allamby and I'm your Red String penpal? I'm 33 years old, I work in graphic design and I hope to be able to save enough one day to take some time off and paint and put together my own gallery showing.

I've tried sending versions of this letter three times now, but something always seems to go wrong. A return to sender, an undeliverable, and then the third one just seemed to go entirely missing as I haven't heard from you.

As they say: fourth times the charm, right? I hope you're not intentionally ignoring me, otherwise this letter may be a little awkward.

Anyway, can't wait to hear from you!

xx Mary

P.S Photo of me attached in case that also got waylaid.

Appended is a portrait shot of Mary wearing yellow.

Stede's journal:

Friday 29th December

Fuck.

Stede's journal:

Friday 29th December

What do I tell Ed?

An unsent letter from Stede:

Hi Mary,

My name is Stede Bonnet and this is actually kind of a funny story

A letter from Stede:

Hi Mary,

My name is Stede Bonnet. I'm 36 years old, I'm a museum curator and I mainly work with bugs. It weirds some people out, I guess, but that's my thing. I don't know what happened with your letters, that's very strange. I certainly wasn't ignoring you on purpose.

Regards,
Stede

A letter from Mary:

Hi Stede,

Should we kick this off properly then? Red String gave me a list of questions to ask you, maybe you got the same ones? Let's start at the top, I guess. What's something you're glad you'll never have to do again?

xx Mary

A note in Ed's handwriting, burned.

What the fuck, Stede. What the actual fuck. Write me a letter out of NOWHERE, string me on for months and then ghost me?? GHOST ME??

Another note in Ed's handwriting, burned.

I don't know if I want to cry or smash things. Maybe cry while smashing things. That could work.

A crumpled and torn note in Ed's handwriting.

I used to be better than this. Why does one TEENSY bit of heartbreak over someone I've never even met send me into a tailspin?? A STRANGER.

Stede's journal:

Tuesday 16th January

I think I'm going insane. I was looking through all the letters from Ed, trying to figure out what to say to him, trying to figure out what made the spark work between us if it wasn't Red String's planning and why can't I make the same thing work with Mary but...

I found the envelope Ed's first letter came in. It should have been empty. I have the letter with the rest of my stack. But it's not empty. It's filled with stuff. Filled with notes from Ed. And he definitely didn't send these right?? There's no way he would have sent these. And how did they get in the envelope??

A torn note in Ed's handwriting.

Is he even a stranger? Really?? After all this, I thought I was maybe... in love with him. Should have known better. Guys like you don't get love. Guys like you get stood up and maybe the whole thing was made up and he was a catfish and you look pathetic.

Another torn note in Ed's handwriting.

It felt so real though. I thought... I thought he liked me. Really genuinely liked me. And not just the rough and gruff Captain Teach, he hardly knows that guy, but the real me. Last week I could have sworn it.

A rumpled post-it note in Ed's handwriting.

He called us soulmates like it was as easy as breathing. Soulmates.

Envelope paper, torn, in Ed's handwriting.

I can't stop staring at the photos he sent. I want to punch him. I want to kiss him.

Torn craft paper. Ed's handwriting.

I miss him.

Stede's journal:

Wednesday 17th January

I think I've made a mistake.

A letter from Stede:

Mary,

This is going to be hard to explain but I think Red String made a mistake. I'm not your soulmate.

Something happened to me these past few months that really changed me. I met someone and... and he makes me really happy and I think I'm in love with him. I think he's my true soulmate.

I'm sorry to do this to you, I really am, but I hope you will be able to find your own true soulmate out there.

Stede

A letter from Stede:

Dear Ed,

I'm so sorry for missing our date. I don't know what happened. I mean, I do know what happened, but I don't know why I made that stupid decision.

I got- Well, I got a letter that kind of threw me out of sorts. It's a long story, now that I realise you probably don't even know the half of it I thought you did.

This isn't making any sense. I need to explain this in person. Can we meet this Thursday at the botanic gardens?

Yours,
Stede x

A torn note in Ed's handwriting.

Now I'm mad all over again! Who does he think he is, writing trying to apologise?? I couldn't even read it, it made me feel sick just looking at it.

Stede's journal:

Sunday 21st January

What the fuck is happening?? How am I getting these?? What is going on??

A post-it note in Ed's handwriting.

Can I stop thinking about him now please, universe. That would be great.

Stede's journal:

Monday 22nd January

What do I do? What do I do?? I can't keep these, can I? This is such an invasion of privacy.

A letter from Stede:

Dear Ed,

I don't know what's happening but I seem to be getting some notes from you - maybe your journal entries?? Please read this letter, I need you to explain to me what's going on.

Yours,
Stede

Another torn piece of envelope in Ed's handwriting.

Another one. I'm throwing it in the bin.

Stede's journal:

Friday 26th January

Fuck, he's never going to read another thing I write, is he? I've fucked this up. He won't forgive me.

Stede's journal:

Friday 26th January

I need to destroy this envelope. I need to stop getting these notes.

Stede's journal:

Friday 26th January

But what if that means I never hear from him again?

A letter from Mary:

Hi Stede,

I understand. We have to follow our hearts: in everything. That's the only way to find true joy. And things like this happen for a reason, I'm sure of it. Be happy, Stede.

xx Mary

Stede's journal:

Monday 29th January

I have to do it. I have to destroy it.

A letter from Stede:

Ed,

I've burned the (magic?) envelope. If you actually do read this, it's done. I won't see anything more you write. You deserve that privacy. It was wrong of me to take this long to do it. I'm sorry.

Stede

Stede's journal:

Wednesday 14th February

God, I miss him.

A letter from Stede:

Dearest Ed,

Do you believe everything happens for a reason? Or do we just find reasons after things happen?

I know it's been a bit now since we were meant to meet and I fucked everything up. But maybe I needed to fuck things up so I would know exactly what I wanted, no regrets, no holdbacks.

And what I want is you.

I know there's not much hope left that you'll forgive me at this point, but I have to say it anyway. I'm so sorry.

Always yours,
Stede

A torn note from Ed:

Meet me at the waterfront walk Monday at 5.

The end.

Below is a series of letters from Ed that form the epilogue of this piece, which takes place two years after the bulk of the story.

An envelope. On it reads:

STEDE! DO NOT OPEN

until the morning of February 14th

A sketch of two lovehearts adorns the envelope.

A letter from Ed:

Stede darling,

I know you’ll be barely awake when you’re reading this, the temptation would have been too much. That’s why this message is short. Go get coffee first, love. Next letter beneath the kettle. 

Ed x

Another envelope. On it is a post-it note that reads:

Did you finish your coffee first? Or are you still drinking? You're still drinking aren't you? Finish it you numpty.

Inside the envelope is a letter that reads:

Stede,

When you read this note I will have been sailing for three weeks. I’m sure not much has happened. I’m sure I’ve been missing you like crazy the whole time. I’m sure I will be so ready to come home to you. It’s dumb, coz I miss you while writing this and I haven’t even left yet.

Now that you’ve woken up properly, it’s time to make yourself a special breakfast. I left a packet of crumpets in the chest freezer.

Next letter is in the toaster, please don’t set it on fire! (See why you needed the coffee first?)

Read it while sitting at the kitchen table with your crumpets and don’t you dare sit in my seat, I want to be able to imagine you with the way the sun shines off your hair in the morning light. It’s always my favourite view.

xx Ed

Another letter that reads:

Stede, I hope you’ve figured out by now that these notes and letters will be a running theme of your day. I couldn’t be there in person, so this will have to do, but I hope it makes up for it. I hope it feels like old times (the good ones only thanks). 

I feel a little bit like a moron, writing these. Prepare to get sappy! But if there’s any day for it, it’s today right? In my absence I want you to feel absolutely cherished and adored. Like you make me feel every day. Okay. Thanks. Get to it. Hut hut.

Go easy on yourself today for me, love. Get to work a little late, no one will mind. Take your time, take the scenic route. I love the way you smile when you roll the windows down and the wind’s in your hair and if the weather report held up since I wrote this, it should be the perfect blend of hot but not too sticky where you can really enjoy it. 

More to come x

The next letter reads:

Hi babe, welcome to your office. I hope this is the first thing you saw when you sat down. I told Lucius to get in extra early to leave it for you, at threat of serious injury. Those history department boys really are the best.

Over the next few notes I’m going to be telling you five of the things I love the absolute most about you, so get strapped in, ready for the ride, baby. Try not to blush.

You’re blushing just at the idea of what I might say aren’t you? No no, I’m being chaste today. Romantic, not a bastard. Or at least I’m trying my best. 

Favourite thing #5: The way you light up when you talk about your work, the absolute joy and vibrancy of your face. Maybe it’s just your expressiveness, maybe that’s the ticket, but I don’t even understand that much about bugs (despite all you’ve told me) and I could still watch you talk for hours. I think I learn something new every single time. Maybe, after ten years, I might have picked up enough that I could apprentice for you. HA.

Sketched on this letter is a caterpillar.

Another letter from Ed:

Did Jim manage to sneak this one onto your lunchbox? You’ll have to tell me how they managed it later. Don’t you dare rush your lunch break, it's your time, not company time, as I have told you over and over again. You better start listening to me on this one sometime soon.

Favourite Thing #4: The colour of your eyes, that warm golden hazel. I try to be subtle about it, but surely you’ve noticed how much I end up staring at your eyes. They do things to me, man. Puddle-of-mush style things. Do you understand the power they have? Do you turn them on other people? I might just get a little jealous if you tell me you do…

Have a good afternoon, love x

The next letter from Ed reads:

I hope you enjoyed your hand delivered cup of tea, and the rose. The boys told me they wouldn’t be a dick about it, so you let me know if they teased you. Teasing me: fair game. Teasing you: I’m not afraid to fight. And they should know it, so I hope they behaved themselves. Maybe they’ll get a ridiculously sweet partner like me one day and understand how fucking cool we are, even when we’re being sappy.

Favourite Thing #3: The way you approach life with sincere earnestness. And I’m being earnest here. You want the best for everyone, and you put so much of yourself into everything you do and sometimes it worries me that you might get hurt because of it, but then I remember you’ve been there, you’ve done that and that you’re strong enough to survive it and then I never want you to stop. Because more people should be like that. More people should put their positive energy out in the world, it would be a much better place. I wish I was more like that sometimes, but you’re teaching me how every day.

Now slack off for the rest of the afternoon before home-time, I’m sure the gang will appreciate a distraction!

Another letter from Ed reads:

Surprise! I’m in your walls! Jokes, just on your car window. You really do have the best of friends. Let’s make a friends-alentines to thank them!

If I was home, I would be calling you right now to ask about your day while you sit in traffic. Maybe tell you about the boring stuff I did like play video games and order supplies. I’d be cooking you something delicious, but I won’t tempt you with all the options that sadly aren’t on offer. Right at the back of the freezer I left some of that chicken casserole that you can defrost in the microwave (or on the stove if you wanna be fancy…)

Before you start driving, let me tell you Favourite Thing #2: Okay, it’s your dick. Sue me.

This next letter reads:

Did you think I wouldn’t leave a note in the freezer? Think again, honey! Heat while you read, we both know you’re starving…

Is it time? Are you ready Stede? For my absolutely tip-top most Favourite Thing #1? Here it is: The way you love me. Without reservation, with all of yourself. I always feel adored and admired and special around you. I hope that you feel the same from me. I want you to feel the way you make me feel all the fucking time and I just hope I’m doing it right. 

My last note for you is on the nightstand. You didn’t notice it earlier?

This note is signed with a sketch of a winking face.

The final note from Ed reads:

I love you to pieces you silly man. I don’t know what I’d do without you at this point. Here’s to what I hope has been a lovely Valentine’s to top off a lovely year, and many more to come.

Also, I have a surprise for you…

Turn around x

The End