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but you should know that i'm sorry (for being careless with you)

Summary:

Xie Lian is rarely ever nervous. But now, as he waits for Lang Qianqiu to come visit him, he can't help but be worried.

Notes:

spoilers: there are spoilers for book 5 as this is post-canon
i've basically made my own characterization of lang qianqiu please enjoy

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Xie Lian paced around the small interior of the cottage, nervously stroking his hair with his hands. Generally, he wouldn’t be nearly this anxious for something as simple as having lunch together, but this was a special case. It wasn’t just anyone he had invited, it was Lang Qianqiu. Whom he hadn’t actually seen in over a year. The last time they spoke was when Xie Lian put Guzi in Lang Qianqiu’s care. While he didn’t regret the decision at all, he now worried about it sometimes as he was going to bed, among other things. Ever since Hua Cheng came back he started overthinking every other part of his life.

Hua Cheng sat on the table, swinging his feet and staring at the bubbling pot on the stove. Unlike Xie Lian, he didn’t seem nervous about their guest at all.

“Gege, the only thing you should be worried about is the possibility of him bringing along Qi Rong. Relax, please.”

Xie Lian came to a halt in front of Hua Cheng, dropping his shoulders. “I am a bit worried about that possibility. But other than that, I can’t say we left off on very good terms...and I’m sure he’s been stressed the whole year, it’s not like the Heavenly Capital has been in perfect shape. And he’s been taking care of Guzi while still being a god–I mean-”

“Well I’m sure he’d love to talk about it then. Besides, shouldn’t he be here by now? It looks like your stew is almost done.”

Xie Lian nodded as his shoulders tensed up again. Lang Qianqiu actually should’ve been here almost half an hour earlier. At first he was just chalking it up as him being busy with all of his godly duties, but now he was worrying that there was another motive for him being so late.

Xie Lian channeled his anxiety into stirring his stew, which was actually strenuous work considering how thick he had accidentally made it. He stayed stirring it for a long time, feeling small beads of sweat run down his face from the heat of the stew beaming onto him. He heard Hua Cheng get up, and then felt a pair of arms wrap around his waist and a head rest lightly on his shoulder.

“The stew looks delicious,” Hua Cheng complimented, his voice soft and light.

Xie Lian paused, letting go of the spoon he was using to stir.

“It came out a strange color. I don’t know how beef and onions can get so black.”

“Maybe gege just invented a new way of cooking.”

Xie Lian let out a light laugh. That was Hua Cheng’s way of saying that not even he can explain how strange Xie Lian’s cooking can get.

Xie Lian put the cover on the stew once again and nudged Hua Cheng’s head. Hua Cheng released his grip around his waist, letting his hands drop back to his side. Xie Lian opened up one of the cupboards, grabbing a small stack of bowls.

“How many bowls do you think we’ll need?”

“Did you tell him to bring the kid?”

“No..but I also didn’t tell him not to bring Guzi. I’ll just set out four.”

For the next few minutes the two worked in silence, with Xie Lian setting out bowls and chopsticks while Hua Cheng threw more wood on the fire. It was a bit chilly outside, as autumn was finally starting to settle in. 

Xie Lian almost jumped as he heard a firm and loud knock at the door. He scrambled over to it, quickly opening it with a hopefully-not-forced-looking smile.

“Lang Qianqiu! I’m glad you could finally make it. It’s really been too long. Please, come in.”

Lang Qianqiu stayed put outside the door, even as Xie Lian opened it wider and stepped to the side. He looked practically the same as he did the year prior, the same thick brows and firm jaw framing his face. He had the same small beauty mark by his mouth, and the same small scar on the bottom of his chin from when he was 12 and fell off his bed. Xie Lian couldn’t help but wonder if he kept that scar intentionally. Surely a scar like that could fade over 300 years?

Gripping tightly to his hand was a boy who surely had to be Guzi, though he looked much different from the last time Xie Lian had seen him. He looked much more put together and clean. He had definitely gotten taller. His chin was held up in a confident posture, and his hair was both longer and tied up in the exact same way as Lang Qianqiu’s, with half of it tied back into a ponytail and the other half falling down his back. Two long strands of hair framed his face and cute bangs flew out to the side. It was honestly quite cute, considering this meant Lang Qianqiu must’ve done his hair himself.

Xie Lian gestured again inside, and after his brows furrowed slightly, Lang Qianqiu stepped in, pulling Guzi in with him.

“We’re late because of a scheduling conflict. I apologize.”

Lang Qianqiu seemed to grip Guzi’s hand a bit tighter as he spoke. Hua Cheng glanced between the three of them before gesturing toward the pot, “Lunch.”

Guzi and Lang Qianqiu gave each other a quick look, silently communicating as Guzi pulled his hand away from Lang Qianqiu. He jumped at Xie Lian, who skillfully caught him, not without a large look of surprise on his face.

“Scrap-gege, I missed you! It’s been a million years since I’ve seen you! Where have you been? Have you been here? Why couldn’t we visit you?”

Xie Lian patted his head, “I know...it’s been a very long time, hasn’t it? But me and San Lang have been quite busy. And you must be hungry, right?”

Guzi nodded, hopping out of Xie Lian arms and jumping into a seat at the table, grabbing a set of chopsticks and looking up to Lang Qianqiu. Lang Qianqiu had been standing silently by the door, but at this invitation he finally sat down next to Guzi. Hua Cheng brought the pot to the table, uncovering it and revealing the unique looking stew inside. Xie Lian pretended he didn’t see Lang Qianqiu’s face drop at the sight of it.

Xie Lian began serving each person a portion and tried to start a conversation. “So Lang Qianqiu, how has the Heavenly Capital been? I’ve heard it’s been quite stressful for some.”

And by some he of course meant Feng Xin and Mu Qing. Seeing as they were the only heavenly officials he actively talked to.

“It’s been fine. I’ve been more focused on other things.” With his answer he looked at Guzi. Xie Lian smiled. Lang Qianqiu was definitely the right fit to take care of Guzi. But he also couldn’t help but notice the way Lang Qianqiu was glancing around the whole room, his mouth slightly open as if he wanted to say something but was somehow too nervous to.

Hua Cheng also noticed.

“There something you wanna say?”

Lang Qianqiu looked over to Hua Cheng, his cheeks turning a light pink.

Xie Lian watched as he quietly bit the inside of his cheek before turning to Xie Lian, who was sitting across from him. Xie Lian had just finished ladling out all the stew, and was now simply waiting for Lang Qianqiu to start talking.

“I forgive you.”

Xie Lian double-taked, looking from Lang Qianqiu, to Hua Cheng, back to Lang Qianqiu.

“What?”

“You heard me.” Lang Qianqiu retorted, a bit more confidence in his tone, “I forgive you for wanting to protect innocent people, however I still can’t forgive you for killing my father.”

Hua Cheng glanced at Xie Lian with a ‘what the fuck is he even saying’ look on his face. Xie Lian couldn’t help but feel the same, and was relieved when Lang Qianqiu followed up with, “I understand your motives but don’t forgive your actions. However, I don’t think I can continue to hold it against you, especially considering the fact that I’ve kept the main culprit alive.”

Xie Lian breathed a sigh of relief. He didn’t really know what to expect from this meal, but such immediate forgiveness was not one of his predictions at all.

“Also, there’s something I would like to request out of you.”

Lang Qianqiu’s face was once again turning pink as he looked up to Xie Lian.

“What is it?”
Lang Qianqiu answered him, his voice softer than usual, “I want you to train Guzi. I have enough on my plate taking care of him and still doing my duties as a martial god, and I just don’t have the time to train him myself. I want him to at least be able to take care of himself once he’s older and doesn’t need me anymore. I understand if you don’t want to, but you...” Lang Qianqiu trailed off slightly, before continuing in almost a whisper, “...are obviously extremely skilled in all things weaponry and fighting. And you have pure morals. There’s no one else I would trust more.”

Xie Lian was taken aback. Was this real? The same man who was chasing him around trying to fight him to the death was suddenly entrusting him with the safety of the boy who was practically his son?!

Lang Qianqiu shamefully hung his head, “I apologize for not reaching out sooner. I wanted Guzi to get adjusted to his new home and lifestyle beforehand.”

Xie Lian looked over to Hua Cheng, who seemed only mildly amused by the whole thing.

“Lang Qianqiu, I would be honored to train Guzi for you...though don’t you think he’s a bit young to start?”

Lang Qianqiu whipped his head up, his face now red as a tomato, “What?! Nine is very close to twelve like when I first started training–and I know you would understand wanting him to be trained young–he’s always getting into some sort of trouble!”

Guzi laughed a bit at the statement. He poked at some of his stew as Lang Qianqiu continued on about the importance of training and martial arts. Xie Lian amused him for a bit before fully agreeing.

“And he’s already said he’d love to.”

Guzi finally chimed into the conversation, “I do wanna train with scrap-gege! He’s so cool.”

Xie Lian smiled, once again patting Guzi on the head. Guzi was one of the only people that would genuinely call Xie Lian cool. Powerful? Sure. But cool? That wasn’t a common compliment at all for him.

Lang Qianqiu stood up, bowing slightly, “Thank you for the meal. I have a meeting to attend in the heavenly capital, so we’ll have to get going.”

He walked to the door, gesturing for Guzi to join him. Guzi nodded, hopping out of his chair. But before he walked over to join Lang Qianqiu he whispered to Xie Lian, “You should’ve seen papa when he got your invitation! He was so happy!”

“Guzi, c’mon.”

And with that, Lang Qianqiu and Guzi left, Lang Qianqiu’s face remaining the same bright red as it had been earlier. Xie Lian closed the door after them, his heart full.

Though it immediately sank slightly when he realized that while Hua Cheng had scarfed down his entire bowl, but neither Lang Qianqiu nor Guzi actually ate any of their stew.

Hua Cheng noticed Xie Lian’s disappointment and patted him on the shoulder.

“It was a delicious meal gege, they don’t even know what they missed.”

Xie Lian nodded in agreement, giving Hua Cheng a quick peck on the cheek.

 

Sunday’s became one of Xie Lian’s favorites, as those were the days Guzi would come to train. Some days Mu Qing or Feng Xin would join him in teaching Guzi (though never both of them at the same time, as that would result in disaster). However Mu Qing seemed far less excited about sparring with a nine year old than Feng Xin was.

Guzi was a quick learner, and quite skilled for a nine year old. And as they talked, it seemed Lang Qianqiu was working hard to instill strong morals into him, as Guzi seemed much less okay with eating people as he did the last time he saw him. His morals were also not the only thing Guzi was picking up from Lang Qianqiu. He had the same loud confidence in his voice and the same pride in his skills. These many similarities made Xie Lian much less worried about Guzi’s future as he was before. Because turning out like Lang Qianqiu (to Xie Lian at least), was to turn out as a good, and surprisingly forgiving man.

Notes:

i hope you liked!! also did anyone catch the will wood reference in the title