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“No. Absolutely not.”
Hizashi just laughs harder, gasping for air. “Oh, c-come on, man - I c- pffft!”
Closing his eyes, Shota exhales. “Hizashi, I swear, if you don’t -”
“But that’s not fair, Shota, wh-why can Muffin k-” Hizashi won’t stop laughing long enough to form a full sentence.
Shota turns to leave.
“W-wait, I swear -” Hizashi finally stops, gasping for breath. “Listen, man, I just wanna g-give you good luck kisses too -” he doubles over again, laughter shaking his body.
Shota frowns at him, ignoring the heat in his ears. “Shut up, Hizashi.”
“No, no Shota wait -” Hizashi gasps for air.
The door swings open, revealing a tired Nemuri. “Guys, I was just - oh, what’s going on? Why’s Hizashi losing his marbles?”
Shota glares at her. “No.”
Hizashi just wheezes incoherently in her direction. There are literal tears in his eyes.
Nemuri shrugs, then swings herself onto the couch. “I can wait.”
After another thirty seconds, Hizashi finally calms enough to speak. “I w-walked in on Shota this morning asking M-Muffin for good luck kisses,” he wheezes out.
Nemuri blinks, then points at Shota. “Him? He was asking his cat for good luck kisses? Are we talking about the same person?”
“I’m literally sitting right here, you know,” Shota interjects. Both of them ignore him.
“Not kidding, I saw it happen live!” Hizashi grins.
Nemuri shakes her head in amazement. “Well, you just don’t know some people, do you?”
Shota groans and sinks into his seat. Why is he even friends with these people.
—
Later, Nemuri sidles up to him, a sharp grin on her face. “Heeey, Aizawa,” she starts.
Shota just sidesteps her and keeps walking.
“Wh- hold on!”
“What,” he deadpans, spinning around to face her. He knows very well that Nemuri is like an insistent leech - she wouldn’t leave him alone until she got what she came for.
Nemuri pushes up her glasses. “About the kissing thing -”
“No.”
“But -”
“No.”
“If you -”
“No.”
Nemuri grabs Shota by the shoulders and shakes him. “Oh my god! Listen to me!” She brings her face uncomfortably close. “You can literally get kisses out of your stupid little gay crush if you play your cards right!”
Shota takes a second to register the words, then smacks his hand into Nemuri’s face.
“Gh-! Ow, that hurt!” She steps back, wincing. Shota refuses to make eye contact with her, staring at the ground.
“I do not have a stupid little gay crush on anyone,” he mutters, spinning on his heel to walk away.
“Are you seriously in denial?” Nemuri calls out. “That is so embarrassing for you, Aizawa!”
Shota walks faster.
—
Once he’s finally home, Shota collapses onto the couch. He stares at the ceiling and contemplates his existence until a meow interrupts his thoughts. He looks down to see Muffin purring against his legs. “Oh, hey Muffin.”
Reaching down, Shota picks her up and holds her at arm’s length. “Muffin, I don’t have a stupid little gay crush on anyone, right?”
Muffin meows at him. It is not a meow of agreement.
“Damnit.”