Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Sweetie…”

A woman’s voice, careful and sweet, spoke to him. Ralph didn’t open his eyes. Despite its softness, it did the opposite of lull him. At first, Ralph had been confused. All he knew was he was tired, and wanted the voice to go away and leave him be.

“You have to wake up, now… I let you sleep ten extra minutes…”

Then he was filled with remembrance, and with remembrance came anxiety.

“But you have to get up now…”

Ralph let his eyes open half way. He fixed his position to look at his mothers face. He’s been with her all summer, but it was still so nice to have her back.

“Come on, wake up. You don’t want your breakfast to get cold.”

Ralph took his time, stretching and slipping out of bed slowly as he heard his mother brew tea in the kitchen. Still extremely tired, he goes to the bathroom and turns on the faucet. He cups his hands to retrieve a bit of water, before leaning over the sink and splashing it on his face. After a few times, he feels his eye lids begin to stay open and not drift back shut in an attempt to force him back to sleep. Ralph shuts off the faucet and leaves, walking down the hall and finally into the kitchen where he see’s his mother stirring his tea.

He takes a seat at the table, looking down at his breakfast. Porridge, and a cut up banana. Ralph’s mother came over with a glass of water and cup of tea in hand before setting it down on the table.

“Thank you,” Ralph thanked, smiling at his mother.

“You’re very welcome,” She responded, “And thank you for actually getting up this time.”

Ralph’s stomach had been uneasy all morning. He had convinced himself that summer he’d be able to do it, that all would be fine and everything would go back to the way it had been before. Ever since he had been rescued, things had started to go back to normal, further back than he would’ve even thought. His mother came back after almost 2 years of being gone and Ralph barley having any idea of where she could’ve went. All his father told him was that she moved away and would be back for Christmas. She wasn’t.

Ralph was overjoyed to see her again and she seemed happy to see him. Ralph’s father was too busy over sea so his mother came back to watch over him, especially after the recent events. This had started arguments with his Aunt Daisy and mother, but eventually they came to the conclusion Ralph was in best hands with his mother, even if his aunt claimed she was “mentally unhinged”.

Ralph barley left his house and neither did his mother. He had been on that island for longer than he realized, the trip back wasn’t that short either. By the time he arrived back home, school was already out for summer. He had missed the entire rest of the year, and he was shocked when he managed to somehow make it up over the summer so he didn’t have to fully repeat the year.

Ralph was now in his car, mother driving, on his way to St. Dominic’s.

“You ok, sugar?”

Ralph looked at the back of his mothers head from where he sat. He could only give a weak, “Yes.”

“You excited to see your friends again? You’re still friends with Kane, aren’t you?”

Friends. Kane.

“Yeah.”

“And Frank, I remember you had him over a few times.”

Frank. Frank had made fun of his house a few times as well, though he never told his mother or father.

“I did.”

His mother had glanced over at him, a worried expression visible on her face, “It’s ok to be nervous, you know.”

Ralph didn’t respond, barley heard her, for that matter.

“I’m sure those other boys are just as nervous as you,” Ralph nodded, “You’ll probably even see some of them, I’m sure it was hard for all of you to readjust.”

Oh. She was talking about…

“Mom, please don’t talk about that.”

She hesitated, then nodded slightly. Sighing, she focused on the road in front of her once more. It was a busy day, many cars buzzing around. Ralph could tell they were getting closer to the school.

“How’s your stomach doing?”

When Ralph had landed back home, he was immediately taken to the hospital where he ended up needing to get stitches. They asked him rather nonchalantly how he had gotten them, to which Ralph responded, “Thorns.”

“It’s feels fine.”

Silence.

“We’re here, sweetheart.”

Ralph had almost fallen asleep, let himself be taken away by the movement of the car, his lack of sleep not helping. He forced his eyes open, giving a slight nod before grabbing his satchel begrudgingly.

“Have fun, sweetie!” His mother said as he opened the door.

Ralph climbed out chugging his satchel along with him. Once his feet were sturdy on the ground he looked around at his surroundings. There were handfuls of kids outside, mostly talking, some being dropped off just as he was. None of them he recognized, which was both a good and bad sign.

He must’ve been staring for a bit, as he heard his mother from behind him roll down her window and say, “You’ll be alright, Ralph.”

He turned his head to look at her and smiled, “Thanks.”

“See you at four, sweetie.”

Ralph watched as his mother waved and turned the steering wheel, pulling out of the school. He continued to watch until he could no longer see the car.

Ralph’s stomach dropped when he realized he was now officially all alone. He scanned the nearby area, hoping to spot a friend. No one. He recognized not a single bloke as far as the eye could see. The only good thing was that he didn’t see any of those boys who…

Ralph spotted a group of boys he didn’t recognize. They seemed to be looking at him and smiling. Ralph flushed from embarrassment, suddenly studying himself to see what they could possibly be staring at. He supposed it wouldn’t be that surprising, those boys were sure to know of the events that happened to Ralph, they probably recognized him. That thought only made Ralph more nervous.

Eventually he felt their gaze slip slightly past him, and Ralph turned around. Oh, Ralph thought. They were looking over at the school across the road, St. Elizabeth’s. Ralph wondered what specifically it was they were looking at, he didn’t really see anything besides girls walking around.

He spotted a few more boys near St. Elizabeth’s, calling out to some of the girls. A few of them giggled in return, others scoffed or ignored them. He felt a bit sorry for the ladies, as it seemed some of the boys were genuinely bothering them.

Despite this, Ralph knew he had his own things to worry about, and focused his attention back on his own school. He had to go to Class 201 for his first subject, English. He had toured the school before and he believed he remembered where the classroom was. It was on the first floor, and he was on the right side of the school.

Ralph walked into the building to see many boys in the hall, standing around or on the move to wherever they needed to be. Ralph didn’t know why he felt a bit overwhelmed by the crowd, but he forced himself to push his way into the boys in an attempt to find his classroom.

It turns out he doesn’t remember much of the tour because he ended up getting lost. Eventually he found his way back to the front office to ask a teacher for help.

“Um, hello?” Ralph squeaked. He was facing a brunet woman, seemingly handling paperwork.

“Oh, yes sweetie? Do you need help?” She asked, looking up from the stacks of paper she had in her hands. She seemed to be on the older side.

“Uh, yes. Do you know where Class 201 is? That’s my first class and I can’t find it,” Ralph admitted.

“Oh of course dear, let me take you there,” She responded with a smile, carefully setting the papers on her desk and getting up out of her seat.

“Oh no no, you don’t need to- You can just tell-“

“Oh that’s okay sweetheart, I don’t mind!” The woman smiled and shooed the air away, as if to say don’t-even-worry-about-it. Ralph didn’t necessarily want the woman to walk him to his classroom, as he was bit old for that. It was like when his mother would walk him up to school Year 1 through 2, until one day Ralph was in a bad mood and threw a fit about it. Of course, his poor mother had just thought the boy wanted her to walk him, so after reprimanding him for his behavior, she agreed she’d stop.

The woman lead him down the opposite way he had gone when he first entered the school. It was a bit embarrassing but good to know. She lead him through a hall and Ralph noticed the herd of blocks had died down, as it dawned on him he probably only had around 5 minutes to get to his class on time. He hated being late for things, not just because of the repercussions but also because it just made him feel icky. He supposed it was probably instilled in him by his mother, as she took being on time quite seriously-

Ralph’s stomach dropped as his eyes fell on a certain boy, the first boy he had recognized all morning. A not quite light not quite dark figure, one he almost didn’t recognize given the last time he had seen him the boy was the exact opposite of how he looked now, which was we’ll-groomed, as most the boys there were.

It was Maurice. His hair was straightened again. On the island, it had gotten crazy, it was curled and sticking out, it had reverted to hair similar to Roger’s. But it was back to being straight.

That was all Ralph could take in about the choir boy before he was walking past him and to his classroom. Ralph wondered if Maurice had seen him. He prayed he hadn’t.

Chapter Text

“Here you go!” The woman said brightly, standing next to a door that read, “201”.

“Thank you, uh, Miss,” Ralph stuttered, trying to find the right words. He was still a bit shooken up after the recent sighting.

“Mrs. Stevens,” She corrected.

“Thank you, Mrs. Stevens.”

She smiled and walked off, back to do whatever she had been doing before Ralph had interrupted her. He looked back at the classroom, anxiety quickly absorbing him. He silently prayed to himself, prayed that when he opened the door he wouldn’t be greeted by another one of… another boy like Maurice. He didn’t know what he’d do if he spotted Jack or Roger in there. Or Bill, or Robert, or any of those other biguns that would possibly be at this school. Because if Maurice is here…

Ralph’s train of thought was cut off when a boy opened the door and walked out of the classroom. Ralph’s eyes landed on the open door and before it could close peered in. He didn’t get a great look, as the door quickly shut mere seconds after the boy walked out, so Ralph put his hand on the handle and opened it back up.

Immediately after opening it he scanned the room. All the boys were around his age, sitting and chatting. He noticed a boy waving his hands, seemingly in his direction. His eyes glanced towards the back where the boy was and widened when they landed on him.

“Ralph!”

It was Kane.

“Ralph, here!”

Ralph quickly hurried trying to get to the seat next to him, but once he got there Kane wrapped his arms around him, forcing an embrace between the two.

“Ralph it’s been so long! I haven’t seen you in forever, mate!”

Despite Kane’s tight embrace, Ralph managed to hug him back eagerly, smiling, “I know, I’m sorry I didn’t manage to hang out with you over the summer, I just had a lot on my plate with making up school work and such.”

Kane patted his back briefly, “S’alright. I figured you’d probably had a lot going on, thought if I didn’t see you once school started again I’d stop by your house.”

Ralph took a seat, setting his satchel down next to him, “Why didn’t you?”

“I did, you never answered. I assumed you had gone out.”

“Oh,” Ralph managed. He hadn’t gone out much, but he supposes the times he had gone out, or just when he was too focused on his work, Kane had come over and been promptly ignored.

“Sorry bout that, I really just had a lot going on,” Ralph repeated, trying his best to express his guilt.

“You don’t have to keep apologizing, you’re here now, aren’t you?” Kane asked, smiling.

Ralph nodded, smiling back. Turning his attention back towards to front of the classroom, he heard Kane’s voice once more, “So how was your time on the island?”

Ralph breathed out heavily. He expected he would eventually get questions about it.

“What do you mean?” Ralph asked.

“Don’t be a fool, Ralph. You were on that island for a few months, it was all over the news!” Kane replied.

“It wasn’t all over,” A boy in front of them chimed in, “I hadn’t heard about it until 3 months in.”

“That’s because your family doesn’t have a telly.”

“We have a telly! We just don’t watch it that often, we prefer to read the newspapers,” The boy corrected.

“Well I had heard about it from the beginning,” Kane continued, looking back at Ralph, “So what was it like?”

Ralph searched for the right words, the right answer, but he found his mind was blank. He shivered, images flooding back into his head involuntarily.

“No adult supervision for months, how about that?” Kane ranted, eyeing the boy in front of them, “No one there bothering you about table manners, no one forcing you to drink milk, basically an extended summer.”

“Yeah, I guess so,” Ralph replied, “B-but it wasn’t all that great. There wasn’t much to eat besides fruit and… meat. We were definitely scared at times, not sure when we’d be rescued.”

“Your father’s in the Navy, though, right? He’s the one who rescued you, you knew he would,” Kane stated.

Ralph shook his head, “No, he didn’t rescue me. It was someone different, a different Navy ship. And it was only because he saw the fire.”

“Well, all’s well that ends well, Ralph,” The boy in front replied, shrugging.

Ralph felt irritated, no, angry. He felt angry. He wanted to tell them all that happened, make them understand the horrors. Tell them they wouldn’t have lasted on that island, not like him, they were nothing like him. He breathed in and out a few times, before asking, “What’s your name?”

“Gordon,” The boy answered with a smile, obviously not sensing Ralph’s frustrations.

“Nice to meet you, Gordon,” Ralph tried his best to put on a friendly grin, extending his hand. Gordon took it and shook, looking directly at him with his big green eyes.

“I like your tan, mate,” He complimented.

Ralph flushed, “Oh, thank you…”

“I’m guessing that’s from all that sun you’ve endured in the past several months.”

“Nah, that’s just Ralph,” Kane said chiming in, “He always has a tan.”

Gordon and Kane laughed, Ralph soon joining in. He felt happier knowing he had friends around him. He felt his face light up. Maybe even if he saw Bill, or Roger, his year wouldn’t be so bad. Perhaps he could manage making the most out of what he had.

Chapter Text

So far, the day hadn’t been too bad. He had genuinely laughed during English when Kane got a slap on the wrist by their teacher Mrs. Bradford. Twice. He complained about it once they had left, and Ralph could only laugh at him. He had a few classes after that, none of which Kane or Gordon had. He had made a few friends in each class quickly, though, as engaging with his peers was always something Ralph had been good at.

Though the classes were tolerable now, he knew the work would start piling in soon enough, but he tried to keep looking on the bright side.

After making his way through Art, Science, and History it was finally time for school dinner. He had been looking forward to seeing some of his friends again, assuming he’d be able to find them when the time came.

Once they were dismissed from History, he followed the crowd of boys to the school canteen. When he arrived, he saw that most of the boys were waiting around, a teacher calling out some of there names.

“Boys, you can pick one friend to pair with, and we’ll move you from there!” A woman shouted, trying to be heard over the chattering boys, most of which were either Year 6 or Year 7, “These will be your seats for year, remember that!”

Oh. Ralph looked around hastily, hoping to find someone. He walked around the boys all piling up on each other. He noticed the line for food was growing the more kids were being seated. Ralph stopped in his tracks when he felt a hand grip his shoulder tightly. His breath hitched, the force making him quake. He turned around to face them.

“Hiya!”

Ralph sighed, “Frank.”

Frank pulled him into a quick hug before pulling back, smiling, “How’ve you been? You remember me?”

Ralph let out a slight laugh, “Yes, of course. Why wouldn’t I?” Frank shrugged.

“Dunno, it’s just been a while.”

There was a weird silence between them. Ralph knew he’s never been Frank’s favorite person ever, given the way he’s treated the fair boy before. But they were still friends, they’ve known each other for a while.

“Wanna pair?”

Ralph cringed. He didn’t really want to sit with Frank, especially since it was a permanent decision. He’s much prefer to find Kane and sit with him. But what was he to tell Frank? Denying his offer to try and find someone else would be very rude of him, and would probably only taint their relationship more.

“Yeah, I’d love to.”

Frank grinned, “Wicked, let’s get in line.”

Once the pair was given a table, Table 8, they set down their satchels and got in line for their dinners. Ralph eyes the boys in front, grabbing trays and holding it out.

“What’s on the menu, do you know?” Ralph asked.

“Beef, and carrots, I think,” Frank replied, also looking on trying to get a better look. The line was quite long now, as most boys had been seated.

Once they arrived to the front, they too grabbed trays and held them out. Ralph was first, and held out his waiting for the lunch lady. She seemed tired, but still put minced beef, along with carrots and mashed potatoes on his tray. Along with that, she put a slice of sponge pudding and a glass of milk.

“Alright, sponge pudding!” Frank commented when he saw Ralph’s tray. Ralph smiled and stood over to the side, waiting for Frank as he took his spot and held out his tray, “Didn’t your mother make us sponge pudding once?”

Ralph tried to recall one of the times Frank had been over to his house. His mother wasn’t a big cook or anything, but he supposed she must’ve made it for the occasion, “I’m sure she did.”

“She did, it was delicious,” Frank said, licking his lips, “I hope this can live up to it.”

The two boys walked back to their table, making small talk as they did so. It was quite noisy in the canteen. Ralph looked around, and to his relief, he didn’t couldn’t spot any of the boys who were once in Jack’s tribe.

The relief was short lived.

The moment he got to the table, he spotted one. One of them.

Bill.

He was sitting at their table.

Ralph wanted to leave.

Grab his satchel and run off.

But he couldn’t. So he sat down. He would’ve preferred if he didn’t have to sit on the opposite side of Bill, because that meant he was facing him, but the other side of the table was already filled. There was only room for two more on the opposite bench. Frank quickly joined him.

Ralph took a few deep breaths, in and out. Just don’t look at him, he thought. He tried to direct his attention to something else and I’m doing so, he noticed a taller, older looking boy sitting on the other side of the table. Ralph nudged Frank lightly.

“Who’s that?” Ralph whispered, gesturing to the older boy.

“Him? I think his names Alan. He’s Head of Table,” Frank muttered back.

“Head of Table?”

“Yes, he’s to watch us and make sure we’re doing what we’re supposed to.”

“So no teachers?”

“Well, some,” Frank said nodding to the teachers near the entrance of the canteen, “But not individually at every table. Just an older boy who sits with us.”

Ralph nodded. This was all a bit different from primary school. Usually there was a teacher to watch over them and teach them their table manners, it was irritating at times, but he had been used to it. Perhaps this will prove to be a bit more… freeing.

The boys began to eat, digging into their beef and mashed potatoes. Frank took a few bites of a carrot before setting it down and taking a piece of sponge pudding. Ralph noticed a teacher walk by and watch for a moment, before tapping the older boy on the shoulder and whispering something to him. He nodded and the woman walked away.

“Alright, lads. Let’s introduce ourselves,” The boy said, breaking the silence before turning to Frank, “And put that down, you don’t eat your dessert first.”

Frank frowned and set the piece of pudding down before turning his attention back to the head of the table.

“Now, we’ll go clockwise. I’m Alan. You?,” He questioned, looking at the boy next to him.

“My names Stephan,” He muttered.

Alan looked at the boy sitting next to Stephan, “Um, Nigel.”

Next was Bill. Ralph couldn’t believe he was about to hear his voice again.

“I’m William,” he sighed quietly, before quickly adding, “But you can just call me Bill. I prefer that.”

He sounded about the same as Ralph remembered. Just a sweet sounding English boy, who could do no wrong.

“Right,” Alan noted, “And you?”

“Paul King!” The boy said brightly. Ralph studied Paul for a minute. He was definitely an odd looking bloke. His skin was very pale, almost a creamy white, as well as his hair. He tilted his head, eyes moving back and forth.

“I’m Malcom.”

“Gareth.”

Ralph quailed when he realized it was his turn, and became shy, “Ralph.”

Frank smiled at Ralph with a bit of a cunning attitude, almost as if he knew Ralph was uncomfortable and thought it was something to smile about… or Ralph was reading into things far, far too much, “I’m Frank.”

“Now that we know names, let’s eat. I assume you know your table manners well by now, so use them. Don’t do anything foolish,” Alan stressed, looking around at all the boys.

“I wouldn’t dream of it,” Gareth stated, looking down at his food.

“Make eye contact when you speak,” Alan reminded.

Gareth put his fork down and looked at the older boy, “I wouldn’t dream of it.”

“Good.”

Dinner came and went. The boys talked, not much, but a bit. Ralph was surprised when no one asked him or Bill anything about what he assumed they were infamous for. Alan didn’t speak much, either. He didn’t really blame Alan, as the boy seemed a few years older and probably had little to no interest in a group of Year 6 boys.

Ralph managed to not talk to Bill, as well. He swore he saw Bill staring at him a few times, but maybe it was just his imagination.

After dinner was Mathematics, something Ralph had never considered himself being all that smart in. Additionally, he had no friends in that class and was unsuccessful at making any. Then was Religion, which was always a hit or miss class. Depending on what studying you were doing, Religion could be a fun, spirituality exciting experience. But sometimes it could be dull and boring, listening to the same thing over and over again on repeat. That day had only been an introduction of the class, and thankfully he had two friends from primary school with him.

The three walked out together, his friends, Percy and Martin, going to History, and him going to P.E.

“How do you get your P.E uniform?” Ralph asked, following his friends who were showing him the way to his class.

“You get ‘em today. Just go sit on the bleachers and wait for the teacher to start, then you’ll pick up your uniform,” Percy answered.

“Only if you’ve payed already, or have money to pay now,” Martin added, chugging along, slower than both of them.

Ralph rubbed his eyes, “Right.”

The three walked along the school campus as quickly as possible, passing by many classrooms. After a couple minutes they reach a large building, and Percy stops by the open doors, “Here is it.”

Ralph folded his arms, “It’s on the whole other side of the bloody school!”

The boy winced, before shrugging, “Calm down, we got here quick enough,” Percy grabbed Martin by the arm and pulled, “We outta get going, bye Ralph.”

Martin tugged his arm out of Percy’s grip and waved in departure. Ralph stood still and raised his hand quickly before turning back towards the door. Walking in he saw there were already many boys sitting on the bleachers or fooling around on the ground, and Ralph, as he always did, tried to scan for a familiar face. Maybe Kane would be in this class. P.E was always more enjoyable with a friend, that’s what he believed.

Ralph walked over to the bleachers and got up, being careful not to slip. It was a bit hot, so he had taken his blazer and vest off, rolling up the sleeves on his blouse. It meant he had more to carry, but he didn’t mind, at least not yet.

The fair boy looked around, hoping to find Kane again. He hadn’t seen him since that morning in English.

His breath stopped when he saw a boy with red hair sitting on one of the top rows, who must’ve been hot as well because he had taken off his blazer and rolled up his sleeves.

No, Ralph thought, That’s not…

Ralph couldn’t see the boys face, as it was buried in a book in between his legs. But he could see his arms, his frail, frail arms, and the freckles that covered them.

He wasn’t the only redhead in the school, of course not, but hair like that was still a pretty distinguishable trait to have.

The boy looked up quickly to his left, over at a group of boys making commotion. Ralph leaned over to examine his face, stomach starting to hurt. He felt like he was going to throw up.

The boy was undeniably Jack Merridew.

Chapter Text

The redhead scoffed to himself and looked back down at his book.

Ralph stood there, half way on the bleachers. Standing there, staring. His chest felt tight, like he couldn’t breathe. He couldn’t breathe.

Ralph gripped his satchel tight and ran down the bleachers, almost tripping as he did so. He ran past the group of boys messing around near the entrance and quickly ran out.

He kept running, running running running, all over the campus, passing blokes who gave him weird looks, like he was going mad. Ralph only stopped running when he found a bathroom, going inside without a second thought.

Running into the nearest stall, he locked the door and sat down. He breathed in and out, in and out, in and out, over and over again.

This can’t be happening… please no…

Ralph waited, breathing heavily, trying to catch his breath. His stomach was hurting, and clutched it as if he were going to throw up.

He wasn’t sure how long he waited. 5, maybe 10 minutes. He knew he was late to class. He could barley think, or even care for that matter.

In, out, in, out

His stomach finally started to settle down, breathing becoming more comfortable. Ralph looked down at the ground. He hadn’t even thought to check if anyone else was in the bathroom. What if someone heard?

Luckily, he heard no one.

Ralph swung his satchel over his shoulder and unlocked the stall door, hesitantly. Once he left, he washed his hands, looking into the mirror. As he fixed his hair, he tried to brainstorm what he should do next; Perhaps I could go to the Nurses Office, he thought. No, I need my uniform…

Ralph took a deep breath once he was done with his hair, before leaving the bathroom. He outta hurry up, if he doesn’t wanna get in too much trouble…

“Where on Earth have you been, young man?”

Ralph lowered his head in defeat as he got scolded by his teacher, “I’m sorry, I had to use the restroom-“

“You know you use it during dinner, not now, we have class now! Do this again and I’ll send you straight to the Principal!” He hissed, “Go take a seat.”

Ralph jittered, feeling tears well up in his eyes. He wasn’t used to teachers yelling at him…

He quickly ran to the bleachers, finding a seat on the second row, next to a few boys.

“I’ll repeat, those are your uniforms. Those who’ve already payed will get in line where you see Mrs. Enfield,” The woman smiled and waved, “Once you’re there you’ll tell her your first name and surname, and she’ll hand you yours.”

“If you haven’t payed, you’ll go over to Mr. Fernsby, tell him your size and pay him, then he’ll give you your uniform, any questions?”

The boys stayed quiet, listening to the man speaking.

“Good. Go, quickly.”

Immediately the boys hopped off the bleachers and ran over, trying to be first in line. Ralph, still disconcerted, sat still for a moment, just breathing in and out as quietly as he could.

A shiver went down his spine as he felt someone tap his shoulder.

“Hey.”

Ralph turned around, coming face to face with a boy he did not know, “Hullo.”

The boy smiled brightly, “Don’t feel bad about Mr. Sallow. Before you got here, he yelled at some kid who wouldn’t put his book down. He’s a real plonker, I tell you.”

Ralph giggled a bit, and returned the boys pleasant smile, “Thanks. What’s your name?”

“Clive.”

“I’m Ralph,” He said, holding out his hand.

“I know,” Clive said, giving Ralph’s hand a short, sharp handshake, “You were all over the news a couple months ago.”

Ralph’s smile contorted as he sighed, “Yeah.”

Clive stood on the first row, balancing himself before jumping down. Ralph leaned forward in an instance as the boy wobbled when he landed, thankfully managing to pull himself upright in time.

“Cmon, we outta get going,” He said turning around to meet Ralph’s gaze.

Ralph nodded and jumped down to the boy, before running with him over to the adults giving out uniforms. Despite Clive having a bit of a head start, Ralph managed to beat him to the line with Mrs. Enfield, getting in line first.

“Woah, you run fast,” Clive pointed out in awe once he caught up to him, “You should join the track team.”

Ralph laughed a bit before shaking his head, “Thank you, but I’m not a fan of track.”

“That’s a shame, you’d be real bloody good at it,” He said, “What are you fan of?”

Ralph felt a bit on edge. Maybe it was the use of the word “bloody” or just the tone in his voice, but the brunet boy in front of him almost seemed a bit angry, “Um, well I do like football. I played it a lot in Primary.”

“Interesting, you’d be good at that, too,” Ralph flushed at the nice compliment. Perhaps he was once again just looking into things too much.

Jack was in the same line as Ralph, but he was towards the front, thankfully. Clive continued to talk his ears off, and while his mouth would respond with a simple “oh” or “mhm”, his eyes remained on the redhead many blokes in front of him. After a bit, he faintly heard the woman call his name, saying, “Ok, Mr. Merridew. This one? It’s seems a bit small…”

“S’alright, it’ll fit,” Jack responded, taking the cloths from the woman’s hand. Ralph’s breath hitched at hearing his voice again. Was it just his imagination, or had it gotten the slightest bit deeper?

“If you say so, next?”

As Jack walked back, Ralph could see the ginger haired boy was keeping his head down, looking at the cloths in his hand. Ralph didn’t know why he continued staring even as the boy walked past him.

Did Jack even realize he was there?

Before he knew it, it was Ralph’s turn. He told the woman in the ponytail his name and she handed him his uniform. Clive was next, getting his in no time, before siding next to Ralph and walking back to their spot.

To Ralph’s dismay, there spot was overtaken by a bunch of older boys from what looked to be the cricket team. Ralph groaned and Clive smiled.

“You’d be good at that sport,” He commented, before sensing Ralph’s annoyance and laughing, “Cmon, let’s just go sit somewhere else.”

Clive continued up the rows with Ralph following eagerly behind him.

That was until Clive sat right next to Jack.

Clive patted the spot next to him with a smile, signaling to Ralph to sit down.

“Um, you sure you wanna…” Ralph stated, leaning closer to Clive, almost whispering it so that Jack did not hear. However, it seemed to only confuse Clive.

“Why not? Just sit down,” He said at full volume, making Ralph jump.

Ralph eyed Jack as he hesitantly took a seat next to the brunet boy. Jack was back to reading his book, and had his blazer back on. Ralph could see what book he was reading now, “Three Men in a Boat”, smiling to himself as he did so. He even huffed a few times, giving a bit of a grin, as if he found something humorous. Maybe he’s laughing at me.

Once the boys had all returned to the bleachers, uniforms in hand, Mr. Sallow came back over to talk once more. Suddenly, the man narrowed his eyes before yelling, “Mr. Merridew, for the last time, put that bloody book down or I’ll take it away from ya!”

Ralph immediately looked over at Jack, realizing instantly the teacher was reprimanding him. Jack looked up from his novel and shut it, loudly, before picking up his satchel and shoving it in, directing his attention back at the man, “Sorry, Mr. Sallow.”

Mr. Sallow had a loud, booming voice, one that definitely intimidated half the blokes before him, although it was hard for Ralph to believe Jack was one of said blokes, despite Jack’s obedience once yelled at.

“Don’t let it happen again, Merridew. Now as I was saying, this year ain’t gonna be like your Primary school days…”

The man continued to babble on, talking more about the year ahead of them. While Ralph was listening, he also kept a keen eye on the ginger near him. He was hunched over, head resting in his hands, looking at Mr. Sallow.

Ralph sighed, He must know I’m here, I’m sitting one boy away from him… He grimaced, not to mention the fact I was yelled at in front of everyone…

Once Ralph gave his full attention back to his teacher, and his eyes remained on him, listening carefully to his words and announcements. Soon, even the cricket coach came in and directed the boys on the team to get up and meet outside, briefly distracting the fair boy.

As Ralph looked back at the P.E teacher, he felt a pair of eyes on him, burning through his skin. He looked over anxiously, convincing himself it could be Clive, but the way he looked at Merridew first should’ve been enough to snap him into reality.

He was looking right into Jack’s cold, icy eyes. Ralph felt a shiver run down his spine, but he was still breathing.

Immediately, Jack looked away, towards the front of the gym. Ralph’s eyes remained for a moment, before pulling them away as well.

Bloody hell, he thought. Well, that was that. Jack Merridew officially knows he’s there, in his class.

The year was already proving to be difficult.

But then again, what did he really expect?

Chapter Text

They didn’t do any actual Physical Exercise that class, only talking and listening. P.E was his last subject of the day, and his mother picked him up shortly afterwards. Him and Jack had not made eye-contact for the rest of the day.

When choosing lockers, Ralph chose his all the way furthest down and Clive followed, offering himself as a locker mate much to Ralph’s relief. He didn’t lock it until he was sure Jack was in another row.

His mother picked him up at four like she said she would, eager to here all about it. He answered her first day questions swiftly, mostly giving one word answers like “yes” and “no”, but mostly “yes”, to satisfy her.

The next day went about the same, and he was happy to see Kane and even Gordon again. They seemed to help keep his mind off things like seeing Maurice as he walked to his English class. When Ralph walked towards his class that day, he had once more spotted Maurice, this time instead of looking calm and collected, seemed frazzled, giving a good amount of effort to combing his hair frantically. Ralph tried not to pay him any mind. He prayed seeing him in the hall during the morning wasn’t going to be an everyday occurrence.

“How was the rest of your day?” Gordon questioned, not making eye contact.

“Was alright, I’spose.”

“You flunk Mathematics already?” Kane teased with a cheeky grin on his face, shoulders leaning on his desk.

Ralph giggled in response, “I could ask you the same question.”

“You bad at Maths?” Gordon sat upright and peered over at the two.

Ralph flushed from embarrassment, nodding slightly. Gordon smiled and reached into his satchel. He shuffled around for a second before pulling out a thick, red book, titled “Big Thoughts: Math”

“This is my Mathematics book, my Grandma bought it for me. It’s been helping me out, it has a bunch of step-by-step solutions and explanations, too,” Gordon summarized, “I think you two should take a look.”

Kane put up his hand dramatically and shook his head, “No thanks, I’m not actually bad at Maths. I have an older brother who teaches me. This one just likes to tease me bout it cause I got an F once in Year 3.”

“You made a huge deal about it,” Ralph pointed out, turning to Gordon, “He was practically screaming his head off.”

“That is a complete exaggeration,” Kane chided, folding his arms.

Gordon giggled while Ralph beamed, pleased. The boy continued, “Well, what about you, Ralph?”

Ralph frowned and pondered it. He was quite bad at Mathematics. Given his mothers current status, he’s not sure she’d be able to be a great help with Maths, in fact that had always been a subject she expected Ralph’s father to take care of.

“Sure, I can use it,” Ralph said, finally, “Could I borrow it?”

Ralph reached out for it and Gordon leaned backwards, as if rejecting his proposal.“Sorry, Ralph, but this is my only one, and my mother would kill me if I lost it,” He said, apologetically, “But… I did see a copy in the Library.”

“You did?”

“Mhm!”

“I’ve never been to the Library, I don’t know where it is…” Ralph admitted. Despite his initial tour of the school during summer, he really didn’t know where things like the Library were located, not that he really had any interest generally in going.

“S’okay, you know where the office is, don’t you?”

Ralph nodded, “Well if you take a left, then right, then keep walking straight down, then another left, you’ll see two big doors and if you just go through it’s right there.”

Ralph looked at him blankly. Gordon laughed a bit, “Here.”

The boy turned and picked up his pen before turning back and grabbing Ralph’s hand. He flipped it over and began drawing on the fair boys palm, starting with a circle to represent the office, then lines to represent what direction to take. He flushed and nervously laughed, “If a teacher see’s this they’ll kill me.”

Not looking up, he replied, “Just tell’em it was me.”

Ralph walked through the canteen and immediately spotted his table. He only saw Alan there, but a handful of abandoned satchels sitting on the seats. He figured the rest of the boys had gone to get their dinners, so he too set his satchel down and got in line.

It was quite long, but it moved fast, with Ralph getting to the front of the line in a matter of minutes. He noticed what the other boys were getting: Kidney pie, onions, liver, sponge pudding, and of course, a glass of milk.

Once Ralph arrived back at his table, the rest of the boys we’re back as well. Ralph took his seat next to Frank again.

“Yuck, I hate liver,” Frank commented, leaning in and almost whispering, as if he didn’t want the others to hear.

Ralph gave him an obscure look, “I thought you liked it.”

“When did I say that?” Frank grumbled in response, stabbing the liver with his fork.

“At my house, when my mother cooked it.”

“Oh,” Frank whispered, recalling the events, “S’pose I did.”

They continued eating, not saying anything else. Ralph was sure Frank had done that on purpose. Or he really did think the island messed with his memory, but there’s no way Frank forgot.

Ralph looked around the table and noticed the rest of the boys were chatting away. About what, he wasn’t sure, but they were smiling and laughing. Frank joined in, adding himself to the conversation and he even heard Alan saw a word of two.

But Ralph wasn’t in the mood for talking. Instead, he wanted to get to the Library and check out that book Gordon had told him about.

He wasn’t to leave until his whole table finished their meals and were escorted out by their Head of Table. The boys would then fool and around and play outside until it was time for class again.

Ralph, however, was impatient, and didn’t want to wait that long. So he nervously tapped Alan on the arm to get his attention. The older boy looked up at him from his meal and stared at him.

“Um, may I ask for a favor?” Ralph started.

Alan put his fork down, “I’m not drinking your milk for you, if that’s what you’re going to ask.”

Ralph shook his head, “No, no. That’s not it. I was just going to ask if I could leave the table early, perhaps?”

“And why’s that?” Alan asked, raising his eyebrow.

“Well, I just wanted to check out a book from the Library, and I wanted to get it before anyone else did,” Ralph answered truthfully.

Alan sighed, “I’m glad you care about your reading, Ralph, but you know the rules. You leave when we’re all done, remember?”

“Yes I know, but-“

“End of discussion,” The boy interrupted, picking his fork back up.

Ralph groaned to himself as he heard Frank’s faint giggle. Alan sounded like his mother.

Once the boys were done with their dinners, which didn’t happen before Frank put up more of a stink about the liver, they were excused by Alan and allowed to go outside. The rest of the boys besides Frank went their separate ways. Frank nudged his shoulder slightly.

“I’m gonna be waiting for Kane over there,” He explained, pointing towards a shady area near the side of the school, “You can join us afterwards if you want.”

Ralph smiled, “Sounds good.”

“See ya, mate.”

Ralph looked at his palm, still feeling rattled thinking back to Gordon drawing on it. The drawing showed what he had tried to explain to the fair haired boy. Ralph, following what was on his hand, hurried to the office. Once there, he followed the lines.

After taking a left, right, then left again, he saw two big doors whilst going down the hall. He assumed it was the Library, so he opened the doors and went inside.

Ralph was surprised, this Library was much bigger than the one at his old school. It was far more spacious and had more rows filled of books. There were even more places to sit and even relax, however no one was using them. In fact, Ralph, as far as he could tell, was the only other person there besides the Librarian.

The Librarian immediately heard him open the door, and gave him a smile once she saw him. When he walked past her, he heard her whisper, “If you need any help finding something, let me know.”

Ralph nodded with a quick smile. Gordon had never told him where in the Library it was.

“I might need help finding this one book, uh, Big Thoughts: Math? My friend recommended it to me for Math help.”

The woman nodded, “Of course, it should be over there, near the back where you see that stack of science textbooks?”

Ralph looked over, observing where the librarian was pointing. Once noticing said science books, he gave the woman a nod, “Thank you.”

He walked over to the where the textbooks were, quickly taking a peek at it. They had a piece of paper on them that read “Year 10”, so he guessed he probably wouldn’t be needing them for a while.

He directed his attention back to the shelves of books. He immediately spotted a few red books, so he pulled out each of them one by one in hopes he’d find what he was looking for.

No luck, as all the books were in completely different subjects. He put them back carefully and continued looking. He bit his nail as he tried to find a red cover again.

He looked around for a few more minutes, before eventually wandering over slightly to the section next to the textbooks. He picked up the books before sighing and putting them back. They were disorganized, out of place, like someone had rushed them all on the cart without thinking.

He came across a few titles he had found a bit interesting, such as “The Mill on the Floss” or “Bleak House”. He ended up finding and picking up “The Picture of Dorian Gray” and studying it. He remembers his father mentioning this book. It had been his favorite.

He picked up two more books, flipping them over one at a time. The first one was “Mrs Dalloway”, his mothers favorite book. He didn’t understand why, as the book seemed to be about girls, and he never had any interest in reading a book about girls.

He tossed the book back onto the cart holding all the titles which were now even more scattered than before. Ralph flipped over the other book and took a good look at it.

His eyes went wide as he began to hear ringing in the back of his head.

A voice echoed into his ear, and Ralph had to stop himself from bringing his hands up to cover them.

He was looking down at “The Coral Island”, what once had been his favorite book, now, only reminded him of the horrors that were simply reality.

He felt stuck in place, unsure if his hands were trembling or if it was just his imagination.

His imagination was strong, but not that strong.

So when he felt a hand forcefully grip his shoulder, he knew it was real.

The grip was strong and tight, as if it were there to stop Ralph from running. He felt his heart stop, feeling paralyzed. Like if he moves he could die.

There was a pause. The hand was still for a moment, before the grip was adjusted and tightened. Ralph tried his best to calm down, but he was losing himself, he knew he was. His mind started going blank, the instinct of survival washing over him.

Ralph turned around quickly, balling his fist as if he were preparing to attack.

“Hullo. My mother told me to give you this.”

Ralph felt dizzy.

The boy had deep brown eyes, though one of them was barley noticeable. His hair was kinky and his skin black, but you could still make out the bags under his eyes if you payed attention. If you were close enough to see them.

Roger. Bloody Roger.

Chapter Text

Roger released his grip on Ralph, letting his arm fall to his side. The dark boy stared at him, a cold look in his eyes.

In the boys hand Ralph noticed a bright red cover with the title, “Big Thoughts: Math” on it. Ralph didn’t move, didn’t say anything for a good few seconds.

The blond noticed the librarian coming up behind Roger, placing her hand on his arm with a smile towards Ralph. Immediately, Roger flashed an empty, meaningless smile at him.

“Sorry, I didn’t realize the book wasn’t over here, my son had it,” She apologized. Roger stepped closer, so the book was now in his face.

Son?

Ralph felt his stomach ache. He hesitantly reached for the book, before grabbing it and pulling it away quickly.

Son… Ralph supposed it made sense. Roger did look a bit like her.

“Thank you,” Ralph mumbled, looking at the book. He was too out of it to think if he was being rude.

The woman cleared her throat, “I’ll check that out for you.”

“I can do it, mama.”

Oh God.

“You sure, you remember how to do it?” She asked, unsure expression visible on her face.

“Yeah, I’m sure. You should go take a break, you work too much,” Roger said, giving his mother a kind smile.

The librarian chuckled for a second then sighed.

“What did I do to deserve a son like you?” She asked sincerely, as she ruffled his thick hair, briefly studying it, “We outta cut this mess.”

Roger patted his curls, “You know I like it like this.”

“I know. It’s just getting long.”

She gave him a quick kiss on the forehead before picking up a handbag from her desk.

“I’ll be back in a jiff, Roger,” She called out, blowing him a kiss, “Love you, be good.”

“Of course, ma,” Roger called back.

As soon as the woman waved and walked out of the library, Roger’s eyes darted towards the fair boy, eyeing him before slowly walking towards his mothers desk.

“Cmon,” He spoke quietly as he sauntered around the desk, picking up a small book and pen.

Ralph stood still for a moment.

What was Roger’s… goal? His plan? Was he honestly just trying to give his mother a break?

Ralph decided it didn’t matter. He knew if he was going to resettle back into school and society, he was going to have to learn to function around others, even if those others were Roger. He can’t let his anxiety get the best of him.

Ralph walked over to the desk and set the book down in front of the dark boy. He took the book, opening the flap and looking inside. He closed it after a moment and began writing something down.

“Come here often?”

Ralph’s raised an eyebrow as he looked straight at the boy. He was taken aback by the sudden words that came out of Roger’s mouth, not sure what exactly what he was even talking about.

Roger was still writing, not looking at the blond. Ralph’s face contorted. Suddenly, he heard the dark haired boy snicker. The boy suddenly looked up, quickly at that, so quickly the fair boy jumped a bit.

“It’s a joke,” Roger deadpanned before attending to the book again. Ralph did not respond. Instead, he took a few deep breaths.

In, out, in, out

Roger kept writing something in the notebook, but Ralph wasn’t sure what. The dark boy sighed, looking up to Ralph, “Name?”

Ralph grimaced. He couldn’t be serious.

“Roger…”

“I don’t know your last name, blondie,” Roger raised his voice, making Ralph feel nauseous.

“Do you need it?” Ralph asked, wanting to slap himself when he realized the slight shake in his voice.

“Mhm.”

“Um… Everly,” He answered hesitantly.

“Hmm,” Roger hummed, looking back at the notebook and writing, “Ralph Everly…”

The fair boy nodded, starting to shake a bit. He wrapped his arms around himself as casually as possible to calm himself.

Ralph looked around, trying to distract himself. He focused in on something shiny when he noticed it on Roger. A rosary. A silver rosary.

What a joke.

Roger shut the notebook and handed the math book to Ralph, “Here ya go.”

The fair boy let out a deep breath and smiled weakly whilst grabbing the book quickly from the other boys grip. Once it was in his hands, he shoved it in his satchel and began walking out.

“No thank you?”

Ralph stopped in his tracks and turned his head to look at Roger. He expected the dark boy to be looking smug or amused, but he had the same blank expression as before.

“You serious?” Ralph sneered, loosing his patience.

“Dunno, Ralph Everly, am I?” Roger asked, his arms folding. He kept his same emotionless expression.

Ralph shook his head, “Ju-just leave me alone.”

“So no thank you.”

“Goodbye, Roger.”

Once Ralph had exited the library doors he ran and didn’t look back. He considered going back to the bathrooms to catch his breath and calm himself down, but he decided against it, wanting to spend time with his friends again.

Once he got back to where he left, he found Frank with Kane and a couple others he didn’t recognize playing with cards. He sighed and walked over, setting his satchel down next to him.

“Hey,” Ralph said as he sat down.

“Hi,” Kane greeted, fixated on his cards.

“Where’d you guys get those?” Ralph asked, noticing how all of them were holding some.

“Uh Sydney brought ‘em,” Kane mumbled.

Ralph looked around at the boys sitting with them, but neither of them gave any indication of being Sydney, as they were both just looking at their cards.

“What game are you playing?”

“Crazy Eights,” One of the boys replied smiling brightly as he looked up from his deck, “I won last time.”

“Yeah, cause you cheated!” Another boy barked to the other.

“I did not, you git!”

The two continued to yell, throwing quick insults. Kane groaned loudly, “Are you guys really going to do this again?”

“But he did! I would’ve won, and he’s just goin round telling people he’s won fair and square!” The boy said, angrily flipping his strawberry blond hair out of his face.

“You can’t just claim those things, it makes me look bad!” He yelled in retaliation, “Especially since I didn’t do it!”

“Can both of you shut it, I assure you, no one cares,” Frank hissed, glaring at the two boys.

The two boys scowled at each other before looking back at their cards.

“Finally,” Kane sighed dramatically, “Why do you two even hang out, anyway? You seem to despise each other.”

The strawberry blond huffed, “Well it’s better than going to the library.”

“Why?” Ralph asked.

“Cause that’s where that weirdo hang out,” The other boy with brown skin replied.

Weirdo…

“You mean-“

The other blond leaned in close to Ralph, cupping his hands along his ear, “That Negro boy, Roger! The librarian’s son!”

“Oh?”

The nearby Church bell rang, signaling the children to go to their next class. As they grabbed their things, the boys kept chatting.

“Yeah, he’s like, a super freak. He never talks and always hung out with his little brothers in Primary cause he had no friends.”

That was… odd. He always assumed Roger had been friends with the rest of the choir, considering they seemed to know each other well.

“I just ran into him, y’know,” Ralph mentioned, quietly, unsure if he should tell the boy.

The boy’s eyes grew, “Really? What’d he say?”

“Uh… nothing much, but he scared the living daylights out of me!” Ralph yell-whispered.

“Not surprised, he’s dodgy, people like him usually are.”

“Yeah,” Ralph mumbled.

“My name’s Sydney, by the way,” The boy beamed, putting his hand on Ralph’s shoulder. He grinned widely, and Ralph could make out a shiny metal stripped along his teeth, “You outta be careful around him, mate.”

“Sure,” Ralph replied earnestly, smiling in return.

Sydney looked away momentarily before laughing a bit nervously, “I’m serious though, his mum used to set us up for play dates and things in Primary, and he was weird, mate, I’m telling you. His mothers nice, but he’s… odd.”

Ralph laughed a bit, sighing.

“No, I know. Trust me. I know.”

Even though he had been scared half to death by Roger, Ralph was still happy to have the book now in his possession, as it was already proving useful once Mathematics came around.

Nothing very interesting happened in Religion. Mr. Hill had started off by saying the Our Father at the beginning of class, then the boys followed him to the nearby Church where they collected their own personal Bibles for the class. They were told to not loose them because they would be used for the rest of the year. Percy had eyed Martin then, and Martin had stuck his tongue out at him.

Then, there was P.E. Ralph had tried his best to not think of it, but he knew it would eventually come, anxiety only fueled by his friends.

“You outta hurry, Ralph. We’re changing today,” Percy informed, walking at a fast pace.

“We had to learn that the hard way,” Martin commented, “We’re only given 5 minutes after the final bell rings to get dressed and sit on the bleachers.”

“We were like, 15 minutes late,” Percy claimed rather nonchalantly.

Ralph shook his head slightly whilst making a disapproving “tsk” sound, “You two are so irresponsible.”

“Hey, we’re the ones who showed you to P.E, without us you’d been late,” Percy declared.

I am late, “That’s irresponsible too. I know where to go now.”

“Yeah well we want to walk you, right Marty? We don’t want to go to class right away.” Percy grinned and Martin hummed in response.

“Whatever, you two. Just don’t blame me when you guys are late to your classes.”

They shortly arrived to the front doors of the gym, Martin not even bothering to walk all the way with them.

Percy patted Ralph’s shoulder, “Have fun, mate.” Ralph nodded, waving back at the two as they walked away.

He went inside, seeing a few boys already in their uniforms sitting on the bleachers, wondering how they were that fast.

Nonetheless, Ralph had his own worries to tend towards.

He had never changed in a locker room before. He had P.E in Primary, but they’d always just play in their uniforms, removing their blazers and vest if it got too hot.

Ralph faced the door and took a deep breath. As he opened up the door to the locker room, he was greeted by instant chatter and banter, before he could even see the boys.

He found himself intrigued as he passed by the rows, and despite telling himself he wouldn’t, he ended up glancing at them.

Most of the boys were undressing, talking with the boys around them. Ralph, full of embarrassment, tried to look away from all the semi-naked blokes, focusing his attention on something else as his peered into the rows.

Ralph suddenly stopped at the 3rd row. He remembered that’s where Jack had been when he went to get his locker. And since he didn’t see Jack on the bleachers…

Ralph stopped his thoughts there and forced himself to keep walking.

But of course, Ralph couldn’t stop himself from letting his eyes wander into the row, searching desperately for the red haired boy he once knew.

He spotted Jack almost immediately. He had his gym shorts on and gym shirt in his hands, seemingly smoothing it out before putting it up and over his head. Ralph looked away in an instant. He had seen Jack naked before, or almost naked, but for some reason it was different here, somewhat more… embarrassing. Besides, he didn’t want to look at the boy for longer than he had too.

Ralph finally walked to the 4th and last row. Clive was already there at their shared locker, slipping his vest off. Ralph sat his satchel on the bench in the middle of the row and turned to Clive.

“Hey, Ralph,” Clive greeted with a smile.

“Hi,” Ralph replied, looking into the locker. He cringed as he noticed the piles of unfolded cloths stacked on one another. Clive noticed his stare and grimaced, “Uh, sorry for the mess, mate. I’ll clean it up after school, don’t worry about it.”

Ralph nodded. He questioned if he should deny the offer out of principle, but ultimately decided against it.

Of course, changing was extremely awkward. He was really just supposed to… take off his cloths? In front of his classmates? When he was on the island, his cloths had gotten ripped, but he had never taken them off in front of anyone. And sure, he didn’t have to get fully naked, he could switch off so he always had either a bottom or top layer on, which is what most of the boys did, but still, the thought of exposing his body that much was weird.

He managed to change without having a panic attack, thankfully. It helped that he kept his eyes on the ground the entire time.

When Ralph looked up he noticed Clive was fully changed but sitting on the bench.

“Are you done?” Ralph asked.

Clive turned and smiled, “Yup, go ahead and lock it.”

Once locked, the boys walked out of the locker room and back into the gymnasium, where most of the blokes were already gathered. Clive walked up the bleachers, taking a seat on the 3rd row. Whilst following him, Ralph spotted Jack again on the top row. According to Mr. Sallow, you had to leave your satchels in the locker room, and could not take them with you into the gym. That’s probably why the redhead wasn’t reading his book like he had the previous day. He was just twiddling his thumbs, looking at those next to him.

Ralph looked away and sat next to Clive. He was glad he wasn’t having an intense reaction upon seeing Jack like before. Perhaps he was already adjusting to this new situation.

After a few minutes of pointless chit chat with Clive, Mr. Sallow entered the gym with a notepad in hand.

“Alright, boys, listen up. Today’s our first official day of P.E. What we’re gonna do first is we’re gonna assign a sort of seating. When I call your name, you come and sit down where I tell you to, got that?”

Once enough boys nodded, he proceeded to flip through his notepad, before stopping on a certain page.

“Casey Campbell.”

A boy from a row above them lept forward and off the bleacher, jogging over stand next to Mr. Sallow. The man pointed to the ground and Casey sat down.

“Edwin Carmichael.”

Another boy got up from the bleachers were he was sitting and came running to the teacher, who pointed next to Casey.

“Horace Osborne.”

The boy was directed to sit next to Edwin, and Ralph could see what the teacher was doing, they had done something similar in Primary school.

“Ralph Everly.”

The fair boy didn’t expect to hear his name so quickly. He gave a side glance to Clive who gave him that same enthusiastic smile he always gives then hopped off the bleachers and to Mr. Sallow. He pointed next to Horace and Ralph sat immediately.

“Jack Merridew.”

You’ve got to be bloody kidding me.

Ralph eyes wandered back to the bleachers where Jack was sitting. The redhead got up and walked over.

“Hurry up, boy, we don’t have all day!”

Jack obeyed, picking up the pace until he was jogging. Before Mr. Sallow could point to his spot, he sat down next to Ralph, although he seemed a bit further away than the others next to him.

“A bit to the left, Jack.”

Without looking over, he scooted the smallest bit to his left, a bit closer to Ralph than before. Mr. Sallow eyed Jack and grunted.

“You can’t wear jewelry during P.E, Mr. Merridew.”

Ralph looked over at the boy to his right. He hadn’t noticed it before, but he was wearing something around his neck. A silver rosary.

The ginger fiddled with the silver beads, “It’s a rosary. From Church Choir.”

Choir. Roger had the same rosary as him, so Ralph guessed it would make sense if it were some sort of choir symbol.

“I don’t care, Mr. Merridew, you don’t wear it during P.E,” Mr. Sallow scolded, “Keep it in the locker room next time or else you’re going to Principal’s office.”

Jack didn’t flinch or show fear, like Ralph, or probably most of the boys would’ve, just nodded and tucked his rosary in his shirt. Mr. Sallow looked back at his notepad, “Clive Dixon!”

Ralph didn’t know Clive’s last name, but luckily it was his friend, as he saw the bloke running his way and sitting down next to Jack.

Starting a new row after Clive, Mr. Sallow continued to call out names until all boys were sitting down in 6 rows with 6 people in each.

“Alright boys, stand up. We’re gonna start with a few exercises to get us going,” The man announced, the boys getting to their feet.

Ralph tried to pay attention to what his teacher was instructing, but he found himself glancing back and forth repeatedly at Jack.

He remembered that woman in the ponytail questioning the redhead if the uniform would be too small for him, and looking at him, it really wasn’t.

When Ralph first saw Jack, he was lanky and very thin. As time went on, however, he definitely developed more muscle, probably from all the hunting, no less.

But examining him now, it seemed he’d lost most of it. He wasn’t all bone, he had more more meat on him now, and he’s still quite tall, but he doesn’t look the same as when he last saw him. His tan that was once a grim sunburn has left now. All in all, he seemed to physically be back to normal. Thin stomach, thin arms, thin, long, pale legs.

Ralph stops his train of thought when he realized his face was starting to burn and stomach began churning.

Was he having another panic attack? Maybe, though it felt a bit different than the anxiety he usually has. If anything it reminds him of how he first felt in the presence of Jack when he met him. Was that a good thing?

“Alright lads, arm circles, c’mon, get moving!”

They did a couple rounds of awkward warm-ups, what made the difficulty worse was that Ralph couldn’t converse with Clive because Jack was in between them. In fact, Clive eventually began talking with the ginger instead, same eager, excited look to him. Despite the boys friendliness, Jack didn’t seem all that enthused by his attempts at conversation, which was surprising to say the least. Maybe Ralph was assuming, but Jack didn’t seem like he had many people to talk to in that class, you’d think he’d appreciate someone trying to approach him.

They did share a laugh, though. Ralph wasn’t sure what is it was that Clive said that had made the redhead laugh ever so calmly, but he smiled despite himself. He hasn’t heard that kind of laugh, innocent and sincere, from Jack in Lord knows how long.

Once warm-up’s were done, Mr. Sallow told the first boys in line to grab basketballs from a nearby rack and bring them over. They ended up playing in teams, Casey’s row playing against Edwin’s, Horace’s playing against Ralph’s, and Jack’s playing against Clive’s. It was fun, but Ralph found he couldn’t stop glancing over at Jack and Clive.

One didn’t have to observe for long to realize that Jack was actually quite good at basketball. It seemed because of his height, he was more easily able to deflect or catch the ball, or even shoot a hoop better than the other boys, especially the smaller ones. Jack seemed to enjoy it, as well.

That made Ralph smile.

“Pack it up, boys! Bell rings in 5 minutes!”

The boys abruptly stopped. A raven haired boy with the basketball looked at Ralph before turning to face him.

“Hey Ralph, put it back, will you?” He called, before throwing the ball to him.

The fair boy reached out for it, almost dropping it when it landed in his hands. He looked back at the blokes to see most of them walking towards the changing room.

He sped over to the rack where he spotted Clive walking near Jack, both with a basketball in their hands.

“You’re really good at that, mate!” Clive extolled, “You should join a basketball team if they have one!”

“Thanks,” Jack responded, putting the basketball back on the rack with the others.

He and Clive turned back around at almost the same time. Clive smiled brightly at Ralph, who smiled back out of custom. Jack turned, staring at the ground.

“Hey Ralph,” He heard Clive say, “Race you to our locker?”

The blond stood still. Perhaps it would be a fun idea. He gave a slight nod, “Sure.”

Clive grinned and before Ralph could even blink he was off, giving him a significant head start. He probably needed it, anyway. Clive, at least compared to Ralph, wasn’t the fastest runner.

But the blond didn’t run after him. He could’ve, he told him he would. Would’ve beaten him too, he’s sure of it.

But he continued walking.

Walking behind Jack.

Ralph was so deep in thought, it didn’t even fully hit him he was following Jack. The redhead was still walking slow, so Ralph really had to slow down his pace to stay behind.

He wasn’t quite sure know what he was doing. What exactly he wanted accomplish, what he thought he was achieving by doing this.

Should I say something?

No, no no, he can’t do that. Is he insane? He doesn’t want to talk to Jack!

No, stop being such a coward, just say something. He can’t hurt you anymore. You’re safe, just say something.

Before Ralph could think any longer, his body made up his mind for him. He reached out to Jack’s back, and lightly tapped him.

Jack turned around. His eyes seemed to widen when he saw Ralph, and Ralph felt his chest tighten.

This was a mistake.

They both came to a stop. Ralph was standing right in front of Merridew now. As much as he wanted to step back, properly distance himself from the boy, he knew it would be quite rude, perhaps even make him angry. It would make Ralph angry, so he restrained himself.

Ralph wasn’t sure how long it was that he and Jack stood still, just staring at each other. Being right in front of Jack felt more surreal. Ralph could clearly make out exactly what Jack looked like, even if he only dared to look at anything that wasn’t his eyes for a couple seconds.

It had been too long. He started this conversation, no, interaction.

He had to say something, or else he was going to immensely regret it.

“Hi,” Ralph spoke. It was almost like a whisper.

Jack remained in place, and it was only then the fair boy noticed the redhead looked somewhat baffled. Ralph tried to take a deep breath and hold it as nonchalantly as possible, attempting to seem calm and collected.

Please say something.

“Hi,” Jack said, in a soft and quiet voice. His voice had gotten a bit deeper.

Jack only returned Ralph’s gaze for a second more, before taking his rosary out from his shirt and turning around and walking away, only this time going at a significantly faster pace compared to before.

And Ralph, Ralph was sure he was about to collapse.

Chapter Text

Ralph knew he made a complete and utter fool of himself.

He wasn’t sure what he had been thinking. How could he just… approach him like that? As if what happened didn’t happen? At first, Ralph had been taken aback, almost offended by Jack’s reaction, just saying a quick “hi” and then walking away, as if he was too good for him, but in reality, what did Ralph expect? A hug? An apology? A wide and almost odd looking smile?

Maybe Ralph was a fool.

School was the same as ever, only now there were a handful of blokes Ralph had to make sure he didn’t make eye-contact with.

It was absurd to an extent, Ralph could admit as much, but anyone in his position would do the same. Actually, most in his position probably would’ve lost their minds already, so he supposed he shouldn’t be too harsh on himself.

He continued to make conversation with Kane and Gordon in English, which was nice considering they always had something to talk about, even if it was something uninteresting like girls.

Ralph met a few blokes like David in Art or Emy in History, but they were more acquaintances than anything.

Then of course there was dinner. If it weren’t for Bill, and maybe even Frank, it wouldn’t be that bad. It wasn’t that it was scary. It was honestly just… really awkward.

Then there was Sydney and Munish, who, despite being nice boys individually, tended to get on each others nerves more often that not.

Percy and Martin have been his friends since Year 4, well, at least since he befriended them. He’s pretty sure Percy and Martin were friends since they were babies or something.

And his last subject. He had Clive, who was a chatterbox, but a nice one at that.

And Jack, of course.

Ralph was doing sufficiently better in Mathematics now, too. Honestly, he wishes he could just keep the Math Book, partly because it would just be nice to always have, but also because the last place he wants to find himself is back in that Library.

Clive, obviously, questioned why the fair boy didn’t race him like he told him he would, to which Ralph’s only response was that he changed his mind, that he felt too sore. He seemed to quickly accept that answer, to Ralph’s relief.

Avoiding Maurice hadn’t proven to be easy, as he seemed to stand in that same spot in Ralph’s path every morning. He was never talking to anyone. The blond noticed Maurice didn’t have one of those rosaries Jack or Roger had, so either he just wasn’t wearing it or he wasn’t in choir anymore. Huh.

Ralph would worry about seeing Jack at church, as he’s used to going to the 9:00 AM services. That’s usually the one the kids went to. It’s the one the choir students sing at every Sunday.

But his mother doesn’t wake up that early on weekends anymore. She’ll look at the time and Ralph will see her scurry out of her room, which would be Ralph’s sign to get into his church cloths. She’ll throw on a fancy dress and they’d quickly be out the door, and attend the 10:30 AM mass instead.

This is definitely new behavior, as he specifically remembers his mother making a point of waking up early before she left. Because Ralph tends to wake up before his mother on weekends, he ends up making himself breakfast in the morning. Nothing fancy, just some cereal to fill his stomach. He much preferred his mothers kippers.

“I’m telling you, mate! It scared the devil out of me!”

As Ralph walked into English, he immediately heard Kane’s voice over the other blokes who were chatting.

“It scared us all, I think,” Ralph heard Gordon reply as he got closer.

Kane opened his mouth, about to speak, until he spotted Ralph coming closer to sit down in his seat. The boy grinned as he moved his chestnut hair out his face.

“Ralph!”

The fair haired boy smiled, setting his satchel down eagerly.

“Happy Birthday, mate.”

Excuse me?

Ralph was taken aback for moment, a puzzled expression no doubt on his face as he stares at his friend.

“What?” Ralph muttered.

Kane laughed a bit, “Ralph, your birthday! It’s your birthday, today, right?” Kane turned back towards his desk and flipped through his school calendar, finding a page and pointing at it, “October 16th.”

Ralph paused. “Oh,” he managed to mumble. It was his birthday, “I suppose I’d forgotten.”

“Really? I didn’t think that was possible,” Kane stated, confusion apparent in his voice.

“It’s your birthday?” Gordon asked, turning in his chair to face Ralph, ”Happy Birthday! You should’ve told me, I would’ve gotten you a gift.”

Kane leaped out of his seat, “That reminds me!” He leaned over in front of his satchel, quickly ruffling through his books then pulling something out of it.

It was a small box, wrapped in a dark purple wrapping paper. Ralph couldn’t help but cringe slightly. Purple was such a girly color.

“Here you go,” Kane said, handing the fair boy the box.

Ralph smiled politely, taking the box, “Thank you.”

“You don’t have to open it here,” Kane commented.

With that, Ralph too leaned into his satchel, squeezing it in with any room there was left. It had been a few weeks now, and his satchel had already been filled almost to the brim with school necessities.

“How old are you now, anyway?” He heard Gordon ask.

The blond sat back up, gliding his hand across his hair to make sure it was straightened, “Thirteen.”

“Oh. I turn Thirteen in May,” Gordon said. He fiddled with the edge of the chair, and pursed his lip in frustration, “Should’ve told me it was your birthday. Now I feel bad, mate.”

Ralph awkwardly smiles, “N-no, you don’t have to do that.”

“Of course I do, it’s your birthday! I’ll get you something, in fact, I already have something in mind,” Gordon disclosed, winking before turning back around to properly sit in his chair.

Ralph cheeks felt heated suddenly, his stomach feeling warm. It was odd. He found his mind thinking of things, odd things, like picturing Gordon in his head, fixating on his pleasant features.

Ralph was startled by his own thoughts, puzzled as to why his mind had went to such a bizarre place.

Despite being confused, he whipped the thoughts away, refusing to ask anymore questions.

The canteen seemed more noisy than ever, more rowdy boys were out of their seats and fooling around. Ralph looked amongst himself, noticing there weren’t any teachers or staff or any adults nearby besides the cafeteria ladies.

“Oye, Ralph!”

Frank waved and motioned him to sit once he had his meal in hand and was walking over. Ralph smiled and sat down on his same spot next to Frank.

“Happy Birthday, by the way,” The cinnamon haired boy spoke, grinning.

“It’s your birthday? Happy Birthday!” Paul said, giggling to himself cheerfully.

“Yeah, Happy Birthday,” Stephan adds.

“Mhm.”

“Happy Birthday, mate.”

Ralph jeers a bit. Bill had mumbled that last part. He looked at him, only to find Bill was looking back. Before then, it had seemed they had some unspoken rule to not talk to or look at each other, in fear of… being reminded, he supposed. But it was a childish fear, really. Ralph was thirteen now, he ought to leave such childish worries behind him.

“Thanks,” He muttered, meaning it to be addressed towards the whole group, but still looking directly at Bill, really responding to him.

“So you having a party or was I just not invited?” He heard Frank ponder aloud. He expected Frank to look irritated, but he looked as refined as always.

Ralph just smiled, going back to his soggy cabbage.

“Well?”

Ralph titled his head towards his friend, who was grinning back at him. The blond gulped and smiled awkwardly, “Oh, uh, sorry. I thought you were joking. I’m not having a party, don’t you think we’re too old for that now? Besides, I mean, I completely forgot this morning that it was even my birthday.”

Frank burst out laughing, leaning over his meal then looked back at Ralph with that same grin, “Mate, seriously? How did you manage to do that? Well, here I am thinking Mr. Everly would be too vain to forget his own birthday, but I guess I was proven wrong,” He marveled, shoving his fork into a particularly large tomato piece and taking a bite out of it.

Ralph was a bit- no, a lot taken aback.

Vain? Did Frank just call him vain? Ralph wasn’t vain, he wasn’t now, and certainly doesn’t remember there ever being a time where he was.

“What are you on about?” Ralph couldn’t help but sneer out.

“Hmm?”

“You called me vain,” Ralph told, starting to get cross with the boy.

“It was a joke, mate, relax,” Frank scoffed, taking another bite of his tomato.

Ralph looked down at his plate. He glanced at the other boys, but they didn’t seem to be paying them any mind. Perhaps he was just overreacting.

“Sorry.”

“S’alright.”

After they were done and threw away their scraps, Ralph followed Frank back to their regular spot near two small trees on the lawn on the side of the school. Unlike other spots, you could actually see beyond the school, onto the front roads, the girls school, you could even make out the church if you tried.

Once he and Frank got closer, he could see the other boys already there. Kane was walking over, dropping his satchel to the ground before plopping down next to Sydney and Munish.

“You outta be more careful with that,” Ralph said once near them, nodding towards Kane’s dirty satchel.

“Oh you think too much,” Kane replied, picking up the items of discussion and rummaging through it.

“And you think too little,” Ralph laughed, “Your the one who constantly getting a slap on the wrist by Mrs. Bradford.”

Kane shook his head, “In my defense, Mrs. Bradford is bonkers.”

“She’s nothing compared to our math teacher,” Sydney told, looking at Munish, “She’s giving out the math test to us today! Munish and I were up all night studying cause she didn’t tell us til’ yesterday morning!”

Frank chuckled, “Yeah, I was wondering why you two looked especially knackered today.”

“Alright, lads. You remember what day it is?” Kane, having now gotten to his feet, leaned up from his satchel, pulling out a rolled up white paper, holding it firmly in his hands. Ralph groaned when he remembered what that paper was for.

A week or two ago, Kane had come up with this plan during dinner to ask some girl from St. Elizabeths to the Autumn Dance.

The Autumn Dance was happening in a couple weeks, and it seemed the closer the day came, the bigger stir it caused, mostly amongst the Year 6’s, since it was going to be there first school dance. If it weren’t for that fact alone, Ralph was sure he wouldn’t be going, but for the sake of not wanting to miss out, he’s going, even if it means he has to watch his friend make googly eyes over a girl all evening.

“Why do we need to come with you again?” Frank asked, sipping from a bottle of milk he managed to take with him from the canteen.

“Because I don’t want to look like a nutter!”

“But you are a nu- ow!” Munish interrupted Sydney by bashing him over the head with his arm.

“It would just look sad, alright?,” Kane explained, “Besides, I need you guys there if she turns me down.”

“If?” Frank raised an eyebrow.

“Sod off, mate.”

Ralph sighed to himself, “Who even is this girl again?”

Kane folded his arms, “How many times, Ralph, Irene Whitedge! I’m sure you’ve heard of her before. She’s very fit, and she’s decently popular.”

Ralph shook his head, “Please, Ralph doesn’t talk to girls, how would he know?” Frank laughed.

Munish giggled, “If it’s true then that sure is a shame, you’d be popular with the ladies.”

The fair boy opened his mouth to say something, but was suddenly interrupted,“Ralph just needs to build up some confidence,” Kane assured, picking up his satchel from the ground, “Now c’mon, we haven’t got all day.”

The boys reluctantly got up from there spots on the ground and got to their feet, Kane repeating in haste, “Let’s go, quickly!”

The boys made their way over as nonchalantly as possible. Basically, the only real job Ralph, Sydney, Munish, and Frank had was to stand there and not make Kane look like a fool. They were sure they could manage that.

Ralph had never seen this girl up until now, as he spotted four girls on the front grass of St. Elizabeths, though he had no idea which one was Irene.

The girls quickly spotted the boys approaching, looking amongst themselves, whispering a few things Ralph could not hear until they were right in front of them.

“Hello, Kane, friends,” A girl with medium blonde hair greeted, confident smile on her face.

“Aww, you don’t remember me?,” Frank asked, exaggerating a sad face, “I’m hurt.”

The blonde girl frowned, rolling her eyes, “Shuddup Frank.”

“Yeah, shuddup,” Kane agreed, shoving him with his elbow, Frank giggling devilishly in response. He faced the girls with a friendly smile to initiate conversations.

“So, are any of you going to the Autumn Dance?” He asked, clasping his hands together.

“Of course,” One girl replied quickly, a similar bright grin on her face.

“Yup,” The blond girl confirmed. She took hold of her satchel and reached inside, pulling out a small bag of Pink Shrimp sweets. She poured a few candies into her hand, then extending it towards the boys, “Want some?”

Kane looked on in wonderment, “Wow, how did you sneak that in?”

The girl giggled, “I have my ways.” Kane reached his hand out and picked up a few from her hand, poping them into his mouth. She offered some to the others, which they all took gratefully. Ralph was a bit hesitant, but he did love Pink Shrimp candy, so he took one singular piece and enjoyed the sweet taste while it lasted.

“So, do you have a date, Irene?” Ralph had, from the conversation so far, assumed the blonde girl was the one Kane fancied, but he wasn’t fully sure until right then. Irene responded a simple, “No, not yet.”

Kane nervously chuckled, “Yeah, uh, same.”

He stood still for a moment. His brows knitted and he sighed to himself. Irene looked over at her friends, who giggled silently from behind their hands. It was like they had their own secret way of communication, one boys didn’t know.

“Uh, Irene. If you’re not, uh- going with anyone yet, I was wondering if-“ Kane began, trying his best at sounding compelling, “Irene, would you like me to accompany you to the dance?”

Irene’s face lit up, and the girls next to her smiled their girlish smilies, as their friend nods.

“Kane, I’d love to come with you!”

His eyes glistened, a smile quickly arriving upon his dimpled face, “You will? Really?”

She nodded, to which his face went red, “Uh- okay! That, uh- sounds great! I can meet you here if you’d like.”

The two continue to chit chatting rapidly with each other, both looking increasingly engaged. Once they had done, the boys left, waving goodbye as they walked back towards their own respective schools.

“Well, I never thought I’d say this, but Kane Watson really just found a date before Ralph Everly,” Frank remarked, before being shoved playfully by Kane.

“Sod off, mate! I’m cute!” He insisted, pointing at his cheeks, “Girls adore dimples.”

Ralph laughed with them, “I’m not looking for a girl to take to the dance, I’m fine just going with you guys.”

“Well that’s a relief, since I don’t think we’re getting dates anytime soon,” Munish grumbled.

“You still have some time,” Kane says, “Besides, you can always talk to her friends.”

Ralph scoffed aloud, as if the idea was obviously ridiculous. His eyes suddenly widened at a realization, “Hey Kane, what happened to your paper?”

“Hmm?” Kane hummed.

“Y’know, the one you wrote for Irene to ask her out. You never used it.”

Kane snorted, “Oh yeah, I guess I didn’t. Eh, what can I say, mate. It felt better to just ask with my voice instead.”

“How brave of you,” Frank teased.

“Sod. Off.”

After successfully asking Irene out, Kane seemed pretty chuffed for the rest of the dinner period. Knowing Kane, he would probably remain the same until the dance, where, if all went right, would continue to never be quiet about it. It all made Ralph feel uneasy, although he wasn’t sure why. While his friends didn’t have dates to go with either, they seemed at least excited to go and hang around girls, as they rarely got the opportunity because of separated schools. However, Ralph found himself not really caring, or intrigued, for that matter. He ultimately decided not to ponder it too much.

Kane had told his friends to tell everyone that “Kane Watson is going to the Autumn Dance with Irene Whitedge”, to which Ralph had to laugh at his daftness. However, he seemed very serious and very proud, so Ralph did as he was told, telling Clive in the locker room whilst changing.

“I don’t know who he is, but I do know Irene! She’s very pretty, your friend is lucky.”

Ralph hummed, shaking off his unbuttoned blouse from his arms before taking the shirt into his hands, “Suppose he is.”

Clive slipped his school shorts off, and while Ralph didn’t mean to look, he did take note that Clive seemed to have the same few underwear every time they changed. His mother must do the washing often.

After getting their P.E uniforms on, they made their way to the bleachers together. Ralph couldn’t help but look into the 3rd row, Jack’s row, again while passing. It seemed he always did that. He wasn’t sure what he expected to see, except for Jack changing.

“Actually,” Clive’s lips pursed, putting his index finger to his chin, “I probably should not say that.”

Ralph turned his head with a raised eyebrow, “Why?”

“Because, I have a date to the dance myself.”

Huh, Clive had a date too? He wouldn’t have expected that from him.

“Really, who?” Ralph asked, curiosity clear.

Clive smiled happily to himself, now sitting down on the first row of the bleachers, “A gal named Jeanette.”

Ralph sat down next to him, crossing his legs, Clive following his lead, “Oh. I don’t know who that is.”

“She’s in Year 7, very fit,” He suddenly leaned into Ralph, mouth closer to his ear, and Ralph could feel his breathy giggle, which made his stomach churn, “She has very nice bristols.”

Ralph’s weird feelings immediately calmed down, and instead felt appalled. Any time he had heard someone refer to a ladies chest, he had heard them say “breast”, because as his mother said, it was appropriate. Bristol was so vulgar, and crud. An immediate mental image of a girls clothed cleavage came to mind, and Ralph felt utterly disgusted, “Gross!” He shouted, not too loudly, but enough to make a point.

He shoved Clive slightly, and the boy gave a giddy laugh. It didn’t seem to register to Clive his words had been abhorrent to Ralph.

The mental image disappeared as quickly as it came, to Ralph’s relief. Clive had stopped laughing and began looking forward, his hands resting on his knees. Ralph wasn’t sure if he should make clear to Clive that his words were distasteful, or if he should just leave it be.

He decided on the ladder. He didn’t want to talk about a girl’s private parts for longer than he had to. Ralph liked Clive, but he couldn’t help but feel a bit sorry for whoever this Jeanette girl was. If Ralph fancied a girl, he certainly wouldn’t refer to her chest as her “bristols”.

The two swung their legs against the bleachers, waiting in silence along with the rest of the blokes. Ralph looked over to his left, seeing the cricket team players sitting and waiting for something as well, no doubt for their coach, Mr. Kechin. Ralph leered vaguely. Most of those boys were built quite nicely, and Ralph rather admired that.

“You interested in cricket?” He heard Clive wonder aloud next to him.

“Maybe,” Ralph responded, not taking his eyes off the older, more athletic boys.

Clive bumped their shoulders together, likely on purpose, “You should ask the coach if there are tryouts or something. Those boys look a bit older, but I’m sure they’d let you.”

Ralph exhaled delicately, “We’ll see.”

As he looked back from the blokes from the cricket team, his eyes wandered to the front of the gym, where he spotted a mop of red hair. He was unable to see the face, but he knew it was Jack.

As the boy walked closer, Ralph cringed despite his best efforts when he did see his face as Jack looked up from the ground.

His face was covered in acne, mostly on his cheeks, though he did have some noticeable pimples on his forehead. He possibly had a zit at one point on the island, but he popped it quickly, and it never returned. Until now, of course.

Jack wasn’t the only kid with acne. Munish was beginning to have a pimple or two on the sides of his face, and even Frank was starting to break out and have a couple zits here and there. Ralph felt his own cheeks, smoothing his hands down them briskly. Smooth, like it always is.

He smiled to himself and sat up straight upon realizing his back was hunched over. If a teacher had seen that, they’d have slapped his shoulder for sure. Some kid in History had horrible posture, and the teacher was constantly hovering around him as she spoke, ruler in hand, just waiting for the moment he hunches over again.

Just then, Mr. Sallow shouts from the gym doors, “Alright lads, to your spots, quickly!”

The boys leapt from their seats on the bleachers and to the middle of the floor. Clive and Ralph jogged over together and sat down, leaving room between them for Jack.

Ralph looked away as he saw the redhead approach in silence, sitting down and crossing his legs like the rest of them. He couldn’t help but wonder if this was as awkward for Jack as it was Ralph, but the ginger didn’t seem all that uncomfortable. He looked rather exhausted.

“Your hairs like an orange, mate. Only time I’ve seen that hair is…” Ralph, who had been pretending to be fixated on the ground, turned his head towards Jack despite himself to see Clive staring at him, chewing over his words, “You Scottish?”

Jack shook his head, “My parents are Irish. Uh, Northern.” He stuttered.

Clive looked at him, befuddled, “You sound British.”

“I am British. I’ve never been to Ireland,” He explained, hand scratching the back of his neck, “I was born in England, y’know.”

Clive put his weight on his hands behind him, grinning ear to ear, “That’s real cool, mate. I’m full English,” He groaned, “So boring.”

They didn’t say anything else after that, but Ralph was sure he heard Jack scoff.

“Ok, boys,” Mr. Sallow, now in front of them began, “We’re going to be doing balancing exercises first. Any boys here know how to do a handstand?”

Clive’s hand immediately shot up into the air, “Brilliant, care to demonstrate?”

Clive nodded with a grin, standing up and walking towards the front. He bent over swiftly, legs suddenly up in the air. His body shook a bit, and he had to readjust his hand placement a few times, but it was much better than what most of them could do.

Mr. Sallow smiled and clapped, “Very good, Mr. Dixon!” Clive brought his legs back down to the ground, standing up straight once more. He bowed foolishly, causing some of the boys to giggle.

“Now Mr. Dixon could manage to balance himself on his own, but I suspect many of you won’t be able to do that,” He looked over to the boys, who nodded for confirmation, “So you’ll need a second person to steady you out.”

Mr. Sallow looked over the group, pondering his options quickly, “Mr. Arden, mind helping?” A boy named Royston stood up and made his way over to the front, settling next to Clive, “Now Royston, I want you to hold anywhere on Clive’s calf, and hold him up.”

The boys nodded, and Clive jumped back into a handstand. Despite being able to hold himself up, Royston held onto the boys leg, as the teacher instructed.

“Good,” Mr. Sallow said, clicking the pen in his hand. Reading the boys uneasy expressions, he briefly went over how to get your legs in the air in the first place, adding that your partner can help you get them up if you need it. He scanned over the class, noticing a boy raising his hand, “Yes, Mr. Walker?”

A boy of the name Adam put his hand down, “Can we choose partners?” Ralph hoped so. It would be much easier to partner with Clive given he already knew how to do a handstand, and would be less awkward with a friend, he’s sure.

“No, you cannot. You partner with the person next to you,” Ralph glanced next to him, only to realize Horace wasn’t sitting there.

“But my partner isn’t here,” Adam told, pointing to the empty space next to him. Mr Sallow frowned, “Terrence?” Adam nodded. The man sighed and wrote something in the small pad he kept in his pockets or hands during class.

Once done, he shoved it back into his shorts, “Alright, well, then,” His eyes wandered, before landing on Clive, “Uh- Mr. Dixon. You can work with Mr. Dixon, here.”

Ralph raised his hand as well, to which the man nodded to him, “Mr. Sallow, Horace isn’t here, either.”

Before Ralph got a chance to process the situation, Mr. Sallow replied, “You can work with Mr. Merridew, today.”

Ralph opened his mouth, wanting to rebuttal, wanting to refuse the suggestion, only he knew it wasn’t a suggestion. It was a command. He was to work with Jack Merridew.

He glimpsed over at the boy as Clive got up to join Adam, who waved “Goodbye” to both Ralph and Jack as he left. Jack didn’t return the gaze.

“Alright, boys, get going!” Mr. Sallow demanded, impatiently.

They all hoped to their feet, making conversation with their partner while they were at it. Ralph heard Clive from not too far away introducing himself to Adam, who by the sound of it, seemed to like Clive instantly.

Ralph forced himself once more to look at Jack, who was already staring at him. This time, neither looked away from the other.

“You wanna go first?” The redhead asked abruptly, breaking the silence between them.

Ralph felt himself quiver.

No, no I don’t want him to touch me.

“It’s ok, you can go ahead,” Ralph insisted, stepping back slightly, hoping it went unnoticed.

Jack didn’t say anything more. Only stared and Ralph and huffed quietly. Stepping back, yet not breaking eye contact whilst in the motion, he bent over as Clive had, hands on the ground and legs being brought up.

Ralph could very well see Jack was about to fall over in an instant, so despite his better judgement, he grabbed hold of the boys lower leg, or higher in this instance. He held on tightly, so he did not tip over.

“How long do I need to stay like this again?” Jack asked, looking up at Ralph the best he could.

Ralph bit his lip, “I think five minutes?”

Jack huffed once more, attempting to fix his hand positioning. Looking around, it seemed most boys weren’t holding the other straight up, but more at an angle. Ralph, trying to follow the rest, did his best to bring Jacks legs to a similar level as the others, which proved to be relatively easy.

What wasn’t proving to be easy was staying calm. He was so close to Jack, it made him feel incredibly overwrought. He was holding his legs, the same legs that had chased after him with a bloody spear, to do who knows what?

Jack grunted a few times, obviously uncomfortable. Ralph began to wish he had just taken Jacks offer and gone first, would’ve gotten it over with that way.

Ralph wasn’t too sure why, but his eyes had all at once shifted. Shifted when he noticed he could see… well- slightly see up Jacks shorts. It wasn’t his fault, though. He wore boxers, boxers that weren’t too much shorter than the uniformed shorts they were wearing for P.E, so the blond was bound to notice them.

Still, Ralph felt weird. It felt heinous to look there. And yet, Ralph kept looking. Kept glancing, whilst Jack was completely unaware, too busy struggling to keep himself on his hands.

Ralph kept feeling weird. It was like when he had imagined some girls clothed chest, earlier. It was completely atrocious, and he knew that, so he had stopped.

Only difference was, this time, he didn’t want to stop, didn’t want pull his gaze away. He had sort of wanted to keep looking.

What the bloody hell was going on with him?

Before he had time to really contemplate it, he heard a whistle blow. He looked down at Jack, who, upon hearing the sound, forced his legs out of Ralph’s grip, which made the fair boy jump.

“Ok, lads, switch! Remember if you fall, get back up and keep going. Five minutes, go,” And with that, he blew the whistle again, signaling for them to start.

Ralph tried to keep his mind blank as he repeated the procedure, hands on the ground and legs in the air.

He kept himself up for a good few seconds, but when he didn’t feel Jacks hands on him, he fell harshly on his back. He glanced up, seeing Jack. In honesty, he had expected to see his arms to his side, or perhaps folded, but they were just sort of.. out. Like he hadn’t been sure what to do.

“You’re supposed to hold onto me,” Ralph reminded, with a scornful tone.

Jack looked off to the side, “Yes.”

Ralph got back up to his feet, before bending over and landing on his hands again. After a couple seconds, he finally felt Jack’s hands. Unlike what Ralph had done, Jack’s were on the fair boys ankles instead. Ralph wasn’t sure if he preferred it or not.

The position was quite uncomfortable, as he expected. He was glad they all had to tuck in their shirts, because if not, having it fall would surely be annoying.

As anxious as Ralph was to have Jack touching him, he managed to pull himself together for the next five minutes until they were done. Mr. Sallow blew the whistle, the upside down boys dropped down onto their feet as fast as possible.

“Good job, lads. S’down, now,” The man instructed, “I know that was probably out of your realm, so we’re gonna move onto something a little more your speed.” The man smiled, “Sit ups. Same partner as last time. You all know how to do that. Five minutes, keep going until I blow the whistle, understood?”

Ralph, stunned, couldn’t suppress his worry, as he asked aloud, “What do we need a partner for?”

Mr. Sallow glared at him, before scowling. “To hold your ankles, we’ve done this before, Mr. Everly,” He told, before adding, “And don’t interrupt me ever again. You got something to say, you raise your hand.”

Ralph nodded in obedience, attempting not to let his anger seep through any further.

“Alrighty, lads. Five minutes, go.”

He blew the whistle, and the boys began quickly deciding amongst themselves who was going first. Before Jack could get a word out, Ralph spoke up. “I’ll go.” He needs to just get it over with.

Jack didn’t acknowledge what Ralph said other than crawling over and sitting in front of the blond as he put his knees up and laid back, hands on the back of his head. Sit-ups weren’t very hard, at least not for Ralph, so it should be easy.

It should’ve been easy. But like most things that involve Jack Merridew, it wasn’t.

The redhead put his hands on Ralph’s ankles, not really holding on as firmly as he should, but Ralph didn’t mind, as if he had he’s sure it would’ve caused him to have a panic attack.

But as Ralph kept going, it soon became obvious something wasn’t right.

The fair boy began to feel hot, and flushed. There was this little tingle in his stomach, one that was much too light to be a pain from the sit-ups, although he wasn’t sure what other explanation there was.

Maybe he was getting a panic attack, because the feeling seemed to grow the more he came up and made eye contact with Jack. They were even closer than last time, sitting right in front of each other, and didn’t help Jack was staring at him.

While he was laying back, he felt Jack’s hand move up slightly, readjusting his soft grip. It was insufficient, but it made Ralph’s stomach ache worse.

It wasn’t until he felt something even lower he began to feel his breathing getting heavier.

In, out, in, out, just calm down, just calm down…

The whistle blew, signaling it had been five minutes, despite feeling like five hours. Jack let go of Ralph instantly, getting up from his knees.

Ralph sat up, attempting to take a few more deep breaths to recover from his possible almost-panic attack, until he realized something.

No, no no, what? No, why is this- did I-

It was then, Ralph looked down at himself and could tell, clear as day, that he had an erection.

His breathing stopped, and all he could do for a moment was stare at the tent in his shorts, completely baffled.

It certainly wasn’t the first time he had gotten an erection. He had gotten them over the summer, usually in the morning, and so far throughout the school year. He had one a few times on the island, but he doesn’t remember them being prompted by anything.

Had Jack- he stopped his train of thought before he could think it. He refused to let his mind go there. He had bigger fish to fry.

For instance, hiding his erection. If any bloke were to see this, it would be catastrophic, and humiliating. They may get the wrong idea, a very wrong idea, and Ralph would surely never live it down. He needed to think fast.

His P.E shorts didn’t have pockets, unfortunately, so he couldn’t ball up his fist in it. Without thinking, Ralph stands up and untucks his shirt, pulling it over his crotch. It was the next best thing, even if he did get in trouble.

And he did, as it wasn’t long before Mr. Sallow looked at him strangely, and huffed out, “Tuck in the shirt, Mr. Everly.”

Ralph gulped, nodding. “Uh, can I go to the bathroom?”

Mr. Sallow sighed deeply, “Make it quick.” He turned to the red haired boy, “Mr. Merridew, you work with me until he gets back.”

As Ralph ran for the doors, the teacher called out after him. “And tuck in the shirt!”

Ralph ran towards the bathrooms, passing by a few teachers and students on the way. His hair was a mess by this point, he’d have to fix it after he fixed his erection.

Once he made it to the boys restroom, he ran to the sink, trying to think of what he could do.

He hadn’t gotten one in public before. He did on the island, but he could at least hide it, or distance himself from the others until it went away. What was he supposed to do now?

Maybe I can just wait it out in here… Ralph thought. He’d get in trouble, sure, but what else was he to do?

Just then, he heard a flush behind him. He turned around swiftly, hearing the click of door as it opened. A boy exited, satchel and blazer in hand, noticing Ralph immediately. If Ralph hadn’t been staring like he’d seen a ghost, maybe the boy wouldn’t have given him a weird look.

“You alright?” He asked, setting the satchel down to put on his blazer.

Ralph gulped, thankful his shirt was still untucked, “Yes, I’m ok.” He replied, giving the best fake smile he could muster. The boy nodded, a similar awkward expression on his face, like he didn’t believe him. Either way, he didn’t push it, instead just picked up his satchel, swinging it over his shoulder and washing his hands at the sink next to Ralph.

The boy left, and Ralph exhaled deeply. He was bloody screwed.

Chapter Text

The sun was shining down hard, only the leaves of the palm trees to keep it from reaching him entirely. Ralph sat in one place, and didn’t move. He held back a cough, tried to refrain from rubbing his eyes. He couldn’t see properly.

The bushes surrounding him rustled. They were too close.

They’d gone insane, hadn’t they?

He watched as the fire began to surround his hiding spot, slowly but surely. Eventually, it’d completely take him over.

Holding back tears, he moves back, attempting to keep quiet. He had to do something. Jack and his hunters would surely see him as soon as he stepped out from his spot. But if he didn’t, he’d be burned to death.

Those bloody bastards. They’re trying to corner me, aren’t they?

Ralph had to think fast. He had only a few more moments to make a decision before the decision was made for him.

Before he could make up his mind, he saw the bush he was in rustle violently. Ralph stopped in his tracks. He couldn’t even think, just stared in front of himself, as if he were waiting for something.

From the flames, Ralph could make out a face. A dark face, covered by one of the craziest mops of hair he’d ever seen. The dark eyes in front of him looked his way, right into the fair boys eyes. Ralph looked back, feeling lightheaded.

He was no longer paralyzed. He screeched at the top of his lungs, stammering to his feet. His vaguely saw Jack, and his hunters, clutching their sticks, and as he turned he heard their own hollers too.

Ralph continued to scream. He felt he would go deaf from all the noise. He lunged forward, his own spear hitting one of the hunters. He fell to the ground, clutching his wound, grinding his teeth against each other in pain.

But it wasn’t enough. The other hunters barged towards him, shrieking as they did. All Ralph could do was run.

So that’s what he did. He ran. He was hungry, thirsty, and in pain, but he was in so much fear he couldn’t register it anymore. All he could do is cry out and run.

He felt sand under his feet, hoping in the back of his mind if the sand would get in the hunters face given the wind and blind them.

Ralph was out of luck. The sand didn’t blind them, as he felt someone grab his arm and throw him down harshly. His head hit the sand, and he choked, tearing up, as he looked above him.

Jack. Maurice. Samneric. Robert.

And Roger.

With a stick sharpened at both ends, holding it high above his chest, before shoving down, and plunging into him.

Ralph couldn’t hear his own screams anymore. All he could hear was the maniacal yells of the hunters as they bashed him in with their sticks, impaling him over, and over, and over again. The last thing he saw was blood, his blood, splattered across Jack’s chest and face. He saw no emotion, or at least, he couldn’t tell what the redhead was possibly feeling. But as Jack raised his spear right over Ralph’s forehead, he knew whatever Jack was thinking, involved some sort of sick, twisted, thrill.

Ralph jumped up in his bed, gasping and choking. He was breathing heavily, attempting to catch his own breath. It had felt so real.

Tears formed in his eyesight, and this time, there was nothing he could do from stopping them. He burst out in anguish, wailing and shouting, holding himself tightly, curling up in his bed. He clutched his sheets tightly, attempting to control himself, but it was little to no use.

His door burst open suddenly. He was greeted with his mothers horrified face, as she scrambled towards him. “Ralph, what happened?”

Ralph didn’t answer. He yelped into his sheets, groaning and whining, unable to control himself. He closed his eyes. He didn’t want to see anything. He wanted to disappear.

The boy felt his mothers arms around him, scooping him up into her lap. “Sweetheart, calm down. Sweetheart!”

Ralph didn’t stop crying. He couldn’t. Despite the dream being over, he still felt like he was dying. His mother put her head on his, rubbing his shoulders slowly.

“It’s alright, Ralph. It’s ok, I got you”. Ralph buried his face into his mothers neck, tears streaming down his face and onto her, trying to listen to her voice and calm himself, “You’re alright. You’re safe.”

Ralph took a deep, shaky breath, hugging his mum tightly.

“It’s alright, mamas here,” She reassured, kissing the top of his head. Ralph shook in her arms, chest rising and falling with unease. “Tell me what happened.” She demanded calmly. But Ralph could not speak. And it seemed soon his mother understood that. She lay him down gently onto his bed again, covering him with his blankets that had fallen to the floor.

“Shhh,” She spoke quietly, looking at him with an expression that could only be described as disturbance, “Just go back to sleep, then, sweetie.”

Ralph awoke the next day to his mother tapping him gently. He rose slowly, rubbing his eyes.

“Get up, Ralph, your breakfast will get cold,” She whispered. As Ralph’s vision adjusted, he could see his mother already had her hair done. Long and wavy, like usual.

“Alright,” He grumbled as politely as possible, stretching as he got out of his bed.

He followed his mother down their hall towards the kitchen, sitting down at their dinning table. She walked over to him with his plate, then came back with two cups in hand, “Here you are, Mr. Everly,” she teased, ruffling his already messy hair with a smile.

Ralph looked down at his plate, grinning when he saw his mother had made scrambled eggs, toast, and bacon, with a cup of tea. He looked up at her, “Thanks, Mummy.”

“Of course, dear,” She said. She had bags under her eyes, Ralph realized she looked very tired. Despite this, she remained quite bubbly like she has been. Ralph frowned to himself, assuming she must’ve had a hard time going to sleep because of him.

She pulled out a chair next to him after setting down her own tea cup, “Mind if I sit with you for a moment?” Ralph shook his head, so she sat, bringing her tea up to her mouth and sipping gently.

Ralph too took a small sip, testing out the heat before making sure it wasn’t scorching. Once he confirmed that, he took a full sip. He examined his mother silently whilst he did so. She was grinning ear to ear. Usually, she’ll wear a pretty dress, her favorite being a blue dress with white polkadots. Today, she had a less puffy, slightly shorter dress on. It was violet, with big buttons along the front. He had to say, it was much less sophisticated than her usual outfits.

Ralph coughed, “Why are you wearing that?”

His mother looked up from her drink, “What do you mean?”

“It just doesn’t look like something you’d wear,” Ralph told, trying to get his message across.

His mother looked off to the side and giggled, shaking her head as she put her cup down. “I was hoping you’d ask about it,” She admitted, “It’s a uniform, Ralph.”

He raised an eyebrow, “Uniform?”

“Yes,” She nodded, still grinning, “I got a job as a waitress uptown, at M&B’s American Diner.”

His mother continued to rave about this new job, but Ralph wasn’t really sure why she was so excited. He had always thought one of the perks to being a woman was that you didn’t really work once you married. He didn’t recall any of his friends moms working, and it didn’t seem like they wanted to.

Mum and Dad are still married, right?

“Ralph, are you listening?” She asked, looking at him directly once she realized he might be zoning out.

The boy snapped back quickly, nodding. “Oh, sorry, I kind of lost focus,” he apologized.

His mother sighed, picking up a cube of sugar from the small bowl she had in the middle of the table, and plopped it in her tea, stirring as she talked, “Is this about last night?”

Ralph cleared his throat, unsure of what to say, “I don’t know.”

The woman frowned, “I’m guessing you had a bad dream. What was it about?” Ralph rested his forehead on his hand. It was quite embarrassing, being so stunned by a nightmare. It was something that should only happen to little children.

“It… it was just the island, I guess,” Ralph answered, trying not to make eye contact as he spoke. His mother gave a sympathetic sigh, shaking her head, “I’m so sorry, Ralph. You should’ve never had to go through something like that,” She made a sound with her lips, as she reached her hand out to stroke her son’s face. “My poor boy.”

Ralph tried to smile back, “Thanks, Mummy.”

She huffed out quietly again, dropping in another sugar cube. If she put in too many of those, she’d get fat. At least, that’s what his daddy had said once.

Ralph and her sat in silence for a few moments, both sipping on their tea.

His mother made a tut noise with her mouth when she put her cup down to her chest, “If I had been there, I’d never let you get on that plane,” She began, shaking around her cup, “Your Aunt’s always been so impulsive. And now look. Hmm, and she thinks she can take care of you.”

Ralph nods along, even though he’s unsure of what exactly his mums talking about. He knew his mother and aunt had their issues when she came back, but he was sure whatever dispute they had had was over now.

It was weird. His aunt and uncle had been taking care of him ever since his father had to leave. His mother was gone by then, so he had to confide in his sister and her husband. In Ralph’s opinion, his Aunt Daisy and Uncle Joshua had done a fairly good job of keeping him in check while his father was gone.

It had been his aunt and uncle that picked him up from school one day with bags of clothes and other necessities in a panic. Ralph knew something bad was going on, but he wasn’t sure what exactly had happened. Turned out, they were taking him to be evacuated. To America, no less. It terrified Ralph, but the two insured he’d be safe.

“I swear, they should’ve just taken you to a bunker. That’s where I went. Instead, she tries to send you to the Americas,” She rolls her eyes and scoffs, “If she hadn’t been such a damn pillock this whole mess could’ve been avoided.”

Ralph opened his mouth to say something. He didn’t like the fact his mum was calling his Aunt Daisy a pillock, as she wasn’t one in slightest. However, he could tell his mother was starting to get angry, and he didn’t want to make her more upset , especially before her new job.

Ralph thought back to the card he found in the mail the other day, with his name on it.

At least Aunt Daisy remembered my birthday.

“I don’t see what you all have against it,” He heard Malcom say, “It’s a pretty good movie.”

Paul shook his head, making a grossed out motion with his hand, “Alice in Wonderland is for girls!”

“Peter Pan a better Disney movie, anyway,” Nigel claimed, taking a sip of his milk.

“Well you can’t blame me, my sisters always making me watch it with her,” Malcom grumbled as he played with his food. Alan gave him a stern look.

Frank laughed, “Did you hear an Animal Farm movie’s coming out?”

“When?”

“In December.”

Gareth fake shivered, groaning dramatically, “I hate that book. You know we’re reading it in Mrs. Caples class, don’t you?”

Alan laughed abruptly, rolling up the sleeves of his shirt. “You kids are so funny, y’know that?” He cracked his knuckles, giving a big sigh, “But I agree with you on that one. Animal Farm can be quite the boring read.”

Ralph cut his meat in half, nodding along, trying to pretend he understood what the others were talking about. He didn’t really seem to connect with this group of boys, and it didn’t help that Bill was almost always talking nowadays, because it seemed everyone else was able to get over it except for him. As much as Ralph tried to convince himself he could get over his fears, it proved to be easier said that done.

“Hey,” Bill began, “Who are you calling kids?”

Alan grinned, pointing his fork at the boy, “You. All of you. You’re just Year 6s, fresh outta Primary. I’d call that being a kid.”

Frank shook his head, “Nuh uh. Ralphs a teenager, now.” He looked over at the fair boy with his signature smile that never seemed to sit right with Ralph.

“Aw, you a little man, now?” Alan questioned, making eye contact with Ralph. The blond giggled nervously as the boys promptly turned his way. He nodded, “Well, I-“

“I’m going to be a teenager in July,” Paul interrupted, eyes suddenly squeezing shut, his hands reaching up to rub them. “I wish we didn’t sit so close to the door.”

“Alright lads, we outta crack on if you want to go outside,” Alan reminded, referring to the time-limit they had on dinner. The boys nodded and ate up, eager to leave and hang out with their pals.

When done, they walked over together to the bins and threw away their trash.

“Give me those, and you boys are excused,” Alan said, reaching out for Frank’s tray. He smiled and handed it to Alan as the other boys followed suit. Ralph joined them and ran to catch up with Frank exiting the door.

“Hey, Ralph, wait.”

Someone gently grabbed his shoulder, trying to aid him into stopping. The fair boy felt his body tighten up as he turned around to face them.

He saw Bill shriveled up in front of him, hand’s fidgeting, his foot tapping on the ground. “Um, hey,” Was all Ralph could manage to get out when he saw what was in front him.

“Hey Ralph,” Bill began, “So, it’s been a while, yeah?”

Ralph had to resist scoffing, “Yeah, I guess…”

“Listen,” Bill said, folding his arms, “I’m sorry for what happened, mate. I wasn’t thinking clearly, I- y’know, I wasn’t actually gonna hurt you, I couldn’t have.”

Ralph titled his head. He wasn’t sure how he was to respond. What the appropriate thing to say would be. What he would want to say.

“I just think it’s better if we forget about it, don’t you agree?” Bill continued aloud, seeming unable to stand still given his constant swaying.

No. What- no. Why the bloody hell would he-

“I guess,” Ralph replied, trying to force himself to make eye-contact with the boy in front of him. It felt weird when he finally managed to keep his eyes steady on him.

“Ok, well, alright then,” Bill hesitated, then nodded swiftly in his direction. He opened his mouth to say something more, but shut himself down, smiling as he turned, “Have a nice day, Ralph.”

Ralph breath hitched, as he kept his feet planted where they were. “You too.”

The fair boy remained still for a moment. He wasn’t sure if what happened had actually happened or not.

Perhaps I’m going bonkers, Ralph thought to himself.

Or maybe, you’re becoming a regular person again.

Ralph couldn’t and wouldn’t decide which it was.

Clive welcomed him in the locker room, and Ralph was fairly surprised to see Clive was already fully dressed. Sure, he usually arrived before Ralph, but it seemed that was because Clive was a bit slow and took his time whilst getting dressed.

Ralph began taking his blazer off, but stopped when it was in his hands once he noticed Clive was still staring at him. Just staring, smiling, twiddling his thumbs. Was this not… strange to him?

Finally, it seemed Clive understood Ralph was confused, but grinned regardless. “Oh, sorry. Didn’t know you wanted your privacy.”

I just don’t want you staring at me.

Ralph awkwardly laughed and nodded, as he watched Clive close his eyes, still facing him, but with closed eyes. The boy giggled to himself like it was funny.

Sometimes that kid was bonkers.

Unfortunately for Ralph, it seemed Clive has taken a liking to Jack, because he had sat down right next to the ginger on the bleachers, motioning for Ralph to do the same. Of course, Ralph didn’t want to, but he couldn’t come up with a reasonable excuse, so he really had no choice. Thankfully, he at least had Clive in between Jack and him, so he wouldn’t have to sit directly next to him.

It didn’t last long either. Mr. Sallow arrived shortly, calling for the boys to get to their seat on the floor, to which they promptly followed. Except for Jack. Not exactly. He always walked over, but never ran like the others.

“Merridew, how many times do I gotta tell you, run!” Mr. Sallow spat.

“You didn’t say that in your instructions though,” Jack rebuttals, still walking over. Maybe Ralph is bonkers himself, but he swears Jack starts walking slower.

He has some damn nerve if he did.

Mr. Sallow crossed his arms, “You think this is funny?” Jack shook his head, “Then run!”

Jack did what Mr. Sallow told. Ralph wondered if the island had caused Jack some sort of brain damage or if he was just being the rascal he was.

Mr. Sallow told them they were playing Volleyball, a sport Ralph had never heard of before. The teams were on one side of the nets Mr. Sallow set up. The man explained the game to then, trying make it as simple as possible, though it was still a bit confusing at times to follow along.

“Yes, Mr. James?”

“What if we don’t know if it’s out of bounds?” A boy named Chris asked, putting down his hand once he got the man’s attention.

“Then you ask me,” Mr. Sallow replied bluntly. “Anymore questions?”

The boys stayed silent, looking amongst each other. “Good,” Mr. Sallow stated, looking around the boys, “Now let’s switch it up. Casey, you play against Clive, Edwin against Horace, and Ralph against Jack. Go on, boys.”

Well this was just my lucky day, isn’t it.

No, no I need to stop. There’s nothing wrong with playing a sport. I won’t even be interacting with him, what’s the big deal?

Ralph glanced at Jack, who was already looking at him. He felt a shiver go up his spin when they made eye-contact, eye-contact that only lasted for a second before they both turned away.

The boys got to their spots, Mr. Sallow having to assist most of them by telling them where they need to stand.

“How do we know when we need to rotate?” Chris asked as the teacher handed him the ball.

“After every side out.”

“But what-“

“Oh for fuck’s sake, throw it!” Jack shouted from the other side. The boys turned to the redhead, looking in shock and disbelief. Despite all the eyes on him, Jack didn’t seem the slightest bit startled. He stood with his arms folded in the very front of the net, moving his glare to from the boy to the teacher.

“Language, Mr. Merridew!” The man scorned, glaring at Jack. “Do you speak to your mother that way?”

Jack paused for a moment, before shaking his head slowly. “Didn’t think so. Catch you saying that again and you’re in big trouble, you hear me?”

Ralph eyed Chris who was flushed from embarrassment. He couldn’t help but feel sorry for the boy, being cursed out by an intimidating bloke like Jack.

“Yes, Mr. Sallow,” Jack grumbled out.

“Good,” The man turned his attention back to Chris, who was clearly overwhelmed, “Go serve, Chris.”

The boy took a deep breath and threw up the ball, hitting it with his fist before it went springing over. It would’ve hit another boy if it hadn’t been for the net right in front of him.

“Our ball!” One of the boys declared, going under the net and snatching the ball in his hands. He tossed it over to the server on their team, who didn’t waste any time in throwing it in the air and hitting it. It flew over the net, and though the boys scrambled to catch it, it landed on the ground before they even had a chance.

“1-0! Our ball again!”

The blokes continued playing, and soon it became clear to Ralph they weren’t going to win. Not only were many of the blokes on his team just not good, including himself, the other team also had Jack, who was basically carrying all of them. Jack in general wasn’t athletic, and that became obvious when he was in the back and couldn’t hit the ball from there or catch it in time, but when he was in front, all he had to do was slap it right back to the opposing side. He seemed to realize hitting it downwards would make it harder to near impossible for the other team to catch, so once he hit it down so hard it bounced back up and hit the boy in front right in the gut.

“Ow!” He yelped, clutching his stomach in pain.

Jack screwed up his face, taking a few steps backwards. “Sorry.”

“Whose ball is it then?” A boy on the other side asked curiously.

“Ours,” The boy next to him replied, as the boy who was still holding his stomach with one hand tossed Jack the ball with the other. He caught it and threw it to the server. He hit it, and it immediately went flying into the air, and beyond their side of the court. It flew over Ralph’s head as he turned to watch the others try and catch it, but their efforts were futile, as it went right past them and hit the top of the bleachers behind them.

“So… out of bounds?” Chris pondered, looking at the bloke next to him. The boy nodded. “Obviously, Chris.”

“I’ll get it!” A boy named Francis shouted. Before anyone could say anything, he went sprinting to the bleachers, and hopped up each step. He leaned over and grabbed the white volleyball, tossing it in his hands.

“I got it!” He proclaimed happily, before taking a step down the bleachers.

Before anyone could blink, Francis took a wrong step, and lost his balance. Suddenly he was going forward, and a horrific sight played out in front of them; Francis, falling face first into the bleachers steps, rolling down and falling to the ground and onto his side.

It was loud, very loud, so everyone in the gym had turned to him just in time to see him on the floor and groaning, attempting to pick himself up after the dramatic fall. The boy’s, including Ralph and Jack, immediately ran over to him.

“Francis? Are you alright?” Chris asked, leaning over him and reaching his hand out.

“That was a terrible fall, mate,” Another boy commented, trying to go behind him to assist.

“Everything hurts,” Francis moaned out, and it didn’t sound like he was trying to be funny, either.

The boy behind him turned to his front and grimaced. “Yikes, that doesn’t look good.”

Francis touched his forehead and yelped almost instantly. As soon as the boys got close enough to see it, they gasped, appalled looks appearing on their faces.

“Holy shit!” A raven haired boy shouted.

Mr. Sallow, who was now running over, slapped him on the back of the head. “Language, Mr-“ he gasped when he saw Francis’s forehead, “Oh dear.”

Ralph couldn’t help but gasp too when he saw it. A huge blood mark, looking as if it were threatening to open up the boys forehead all together. Blood was slowly dripping from it, and when Francis touched it again and saw the blood on his hands, he screeched, and the boys rushed to calm him down.

“Chris, Dennis, take him to the Nurse, tell her to call the ambulance immediately!” Mr. Sallow commanded. The boys nodded and patted Francis on the back, as he now tears forming in his eyes.

Ralph looked to Jack, who wasn’t standing all that far away from him. He wasn’t sure why he looked over, he just did. Jack was staring at Francis, somehow looking paler than he already was. Jack took a few steps backwards, before he suddenly took off towards the locker rooms. Ralph was confused as he looked back at the boys who were now helping Francis stand up fully and walking him out the door.

Mr. Sallow cleared his throat. “All right, lads. I know what happened was quite shocking, but I assure you, he’ll be alright.” He clasped his hands together. “Now, we still have fifteen minutes left of class, so everyone, get back to your stations.”

Mr. Sallow barley finished his sentence before the locker room doors burst open harshly and loudly, causing him and many other to turn towards the noise. Jack came running out, throwing his satchel over his shoulder, racing towards the gym doors.

“Mr. Merridew, where do you think you’re going?” But there was no response. Jack threw the doors open and didn’t look back as he dashed out, everyone staring as the doors closed behind him.

Mr. Sallow looked baffled for a moment, before looking around the room in a frenzy. Ralph, who was just as confused, noticed the man’s eye suddenly lock with him. “Everly,” He pointed, looking irritated. “Bring him back, will ya?”

Ralph knew he didn’t have a choice, so he gulped and nodded, hurrying towards the doors. Once outside, he ran towards the edge of the building where he saw Jack running the same path he had taken to the bathroom when he had his panic attack and had randomly gotten an erection. Ralph, despite being extremely on edge, ran after him.

He was fast enough to catch up to him, but he kept his pace steady to stay behind him, wanting to see what he was doing before he attempted to bring him back to class. A thousand thoughts rushed through his head as he ran.

What was Jack doing? Didn’t he realize how much trouble he’s in? Was he not embarrassed?

Jack turned the corner and went to the boys bathroom, shutting the door behind him. Once seeing that, Ralph picked up his pace and darted to the door. He put his hand on the handle, but hesitated upon reaching it. He wasn’t sure he wanted to open the door, to see what Jack was doing. He had a bad feeling, and felt sweat form on his palms.

Still, Ralph had been given directions, and he wasn’t a deviant. He obeyed adults, did what he was asked to do. Mr. Sallow had yelled at him once, and he didn’t want to be yelled at again.

So, with a handful of fake confidence, he turned the handle ever so gently and opened the door just an inch as he leaned in and peered in through the crack. He gulped and prepared himself.

And he wasn’t sure what to make of what he saw.

Jack was there, right in his view point, at the sink. His satchel was on the floor, to which Ralph grimaced with distaste, but his attention was quickly shifted when he heard Jack sniff loudly.

Ralph barley had time to take that in, because it didn’t stop there. He began to hear something high-pitched, like a sharp breath. Ralph tried to open the door wider, as Jack had his head hanging down, so he couldn’t see his face.

But it wasn’t until Ralph could hear some sort of keening that he understood what was going on.

Jack was… crying.

Jack was crying.

Ralph knows he’s seen it once before, when they’d gotten rescued by the Naval Officers, Jack had begun crying, almost everyone had. But Ralph was so upset and borderline hysterical that he barley took in the fact Jack was sobbing, only hearing sniffles later on to confirm his suspicions that he had let tears come out.

But this felt… different. Because Jack abruptly started wailing, and Ralph could hear the boy choking on his own sobs.

Suddenly, Jack lifted his head and looked into the mirror, and Ralph had to hold in a gasp of surprise.

His face was puffy and red, and tears were flowing down his cheeks. He was leaning on his arms, and only then did Ralph realize he was shaking.

Jack choked a few more times before something in his other hand became visible. The redhead brought it to his chest and moved a shaky hand towards it, still sobbing as he did so.

Jack was shaking so much he could barley get the action done, which had given Ralph time to evaluate the item. It was a… syringe? That was all Ralph could make out, but he knew there was something else Jack was holding.

Despite Jack’s shakiness, he did something with the objects that he could not see and took a staggering breath. He turned to his side and Ralph could see what the boy was holding.

It was a shot, like a a doctor’s shot, and Jack was putting it up to his right arm. Ralph was in such disbelief that Jack was going to do what Ralph thought he was going to do, but Jack soon proved him wrong.

The needle slipped under Jack’s skin and Ralph cringed as it went in. He saw Jack’s other hand grab the top and inject himself with something unknown. Finally, once the syringe was empty, Jack slipped it out, as blood oozed from the spot.

With tears still pouring down his face, Jack’s breathing got faster. He turned the faucet on and cupped his hand underneath it. In his hand was full of water, he shoved it to his mouth, taking a large sip, as Ralph could see his throat flex when he did.

Ralph shuddered when he heard the redhead gasp loudly, slamming the shot on the sink and resting his head as his sobs got louder and more hysterical.

Ralph wasn’t sure what to do.

All he knew was he couldn’t keep staring at him. He had to do something, brings Jack back to the gym and follow out Mr. Sallow’s orders.

So he opened the door all the way, and slowly made his way inside. His hands fidgeted with each small step he took closer to the keening boy injecting himself, trying to work up the nerve to say something.

Jack all at once turned his head to Ralph. There was no indication Jack had previously heard him, so the sudden turn of acknowledgment made Ralph shudder and stop in his tracks. Jack stared at him. His expression went from hysteria to anger in a flash. Ralph gulped, realizing they were alone.

“Ja-“ Before Ralph could finish, Jack turned around and grabbed his satchel and shot promptly, and hurried towards the door.

Ralph wasn’t sure if he was being an idiot doing this, but he blocked Jack’s path, making him unable to get past him. Jack screwed up his face, and huffed at once. “Leave me alone!”

He attempted to push his way past Ralph, but the fair boy turned out the be stronger than Jack, at least in that very moment. He pushed back against Jack’s attempts at leaving. Jack tried to reach for the door, but Ralph gently yet with strength grabbed his arm. The redhead growled and pulled his arm away from Ralph and out of his grip.

“Jack, stop it!” Ralph demanded, putting his hand on Jack’s shoulder. He regretted it feeling himself begin to shake when he saw Jack’s expression look livid. He had seen that expression before, and he wanted to throw up upon seeing it again.

“Get away from me!” Jack yelled, and before Ralph knew it, Jack’s hands were on him, pushing him harshly. It was almost as if Jack had gained sudden strength, either that or it had just caught Ralph off guard. The blond stumbled back and lost his footing, falling to the ground. Thankfully, his hands had broken his fall.

Ralph looked up at the redhead who looked like he was seething. He saw Jack’s grip on the sharp needle grow tighter, and Ralph shook with horror. The blond felt tears in his eyes as he felt like his heart was skipping a beat. He felt his stomach ache as he felt sweat on his palms once more. He didn’t even fully notice he was wondering if this was how he died.

But then Jack’s face contorted. His expression shifted slowly. He looked frantic and feverish all at once. He stumbled backwards slowly, breathing heavily.

“I- I don’t-“ That was all Jack said before the shot fell to the floor and he burst out sobbing once more. The redhead fell to the ground with the syringe and needle in front of Ralph, wailing, borderline hyperventilating. Ralph watched the display in front of him unfold. The boy crying, falling to his side as he covered his face, almost as if he didn’t want Ralph to see him.

Ralph sat upright carefully, before filling, unsure of what was happening was even happening. “Jack? Are you alright?” It was a stupid question, and his voice shook as he spoke. Obviously the boy in front of him was not alright.

Jack did not answer, instead just sobbed louder. Ralph just sat there. He had no idea what he should do. The whole thing almost reminded him of just that morning when Ralph had that dream Jack and his hunters were killing him, and became hysterical. His mind went to what his mother had done, but knew he couldn’t possibly attempt to replicate the same for Jack.

And yet there he was, cautiously scooting over to the redhead, and once he saw Jack did not react, put his arm around him slowly. Jack did not move, but did not push Ralph away either, so he continued. He patted Jack’s shoulder, unsure if that would calm him down in anyway. It didn’t seem to work, as Jack was still crying and choking out. Ralph put his other arm around him as well, in somewhat of a side hug, and rubbed his arm, trying to console him.

“Jack it’s alright, okay?” Ralph assured, as Jack shook his head.

“Get- get off of me…” He attempted to push Ralph off, but it was such a weak attempt Ralph barley noticed Jack had done anything at all. Ralph questioned if maybe he just should listen to Jack. His heart was racing and he felt he would soon regret getting this close to the redhead, when Jack suddenly leaned in closer to Ralph, he decided he’d let this play out, even if Ralph wanted to start hyperventilating himself.

Ralph tried mentally calming himself down as he tried lulling Jack as his mother had done. It was unclear whether it was working or not at first, but Jack started to breathe easier again, so Ralph kept going.

After what felt like hours, there were only a few tears left, as Jack sniffed and wiped them away. Ralph stopped rubbing Jack’s shoulder and arm and pulled Jack upright out of his arms, to which Jack complied.

They sat there for a moment, not saying anything. Ralph looked down and noticed the shot on the floor next to Jack. He grimaced and picked it up. Jack noticed this and tried to snatch it away from him, but his efforts were in vain as Ralph had already grabbed onto it.

“Give it back,” Jack demanded, tone harsh.

Ralph looked at the shot, then at Jack in confusion. “What is this?” Jack grumbled to himself and rolled his eyes dramatically. “It’s just Heroin.”

Ralph couldn't help but make a face at that. “Why do you have it?”

Jack grew a pinched expression and looked towards the ground. “It just… makes me feel better is all.”

“I don’t think this is good for you.”

“How would you know?” Jack barked, holding out his hand for it back. “Everyone uses Heroin, it’s fine!”Ralph looked Jack in the eye and sighed with a staggered breath. “My- my mummy says Heroin causes bad things to happen to people.”

“Well she’s wrong.”

“I don’t think she is,” Ralph said, bringing his other hand over the shot. Jack pressed his fist to his mouth, and Ralph could tell his was slightly chewing at it. Jack let the hand fall or his side, before looking at Ralph with sincerity. “I-“

The door to the bathroom burst open and both boys jumped. Ralph threw the shot behind his back and looked up towards the entrance.

It was the boy Terrance, the one who had contributed to putting Ralph in that awkward situation by being absent yesterday. He looked over at the boys on the floor and raised an eyebrow, putting his hands on his hips. “What are you two doing?”

Before Ralph could speak, Jack said, “He’s just helping me with something, that’s all.” He rubbed his head, “I got a bit upset.”

Ralph was surprised Jack decided to tell the boy that, but he supposed there wasn’t really anything else he could’ve said in the moment. Ralph turned back to look at the standing boy, whose expression softened. Terrance locked eyes with Ralph. “You have this under control, then?”

The fair boy nodded, even if he wasn’t fully sure he did have everything under control. Terrance nodded back and looked at Jack. “You’re in real big trouble mate.”

Jack didn’t move. “Yeah.”

Terrance turned around and put his hand on the handle of the door. “It’s changing time, You don’t want to be late.” He opened it and looked back one last time. “Be quick, or people will start talking.” And with that, he exited, letting the door shut slowly behind him. Ralph’s face flushed at his words, and pretended to not understand the implications of what Terrance meant.

Jack broke the silence by standing up first. Ralph grabbed Jack’s satchel and stood up as well, handing it to the redhead who took it quickly. Ralph realized he still had the shot in his hands.

“Are you going to give that back?” Jack asked looking at the item in Ralph’s hands.

Ralph frowned. “You should throw this away, Jack.”

The ginger shook his head. “I can’t.”

“Why?” Ralph raised an eyebrow.

“It’s my Aunts,” Jack pointed to the label on the side of the shot. Ralph read it. Donna Merridew.

“Her doctor gave it to her.”

“Why do you have it, then?”

Jack sneered and looked away. “I’m just borrowing it.”

Ralph frowned again, inspecting the shot once more, being careful not to poke himself on accident. “Does she… know you take it?” Jack shook his head. “Then you-“

Jack growled and threw his hands up. “Jeez, Ralph! I stole it, is that what you wanted me to say?”

Ralph jumped a bit, and hung his head. Jack folded his arms, and sighed.

“Just… give it back to your Aunt, alright?”

Jack scowled, “You’re not-“ He stopped mid sentence and looked away. Ralph knew he couldn’t keep the shot away from him forever, so he extended his arm and handed it out to him. Jack looked at it carefully before taking it into his own hand. He reached into his satchel, dropped it in and zipped it back.

“I ought to go,” Jack said, throwing his satchel over his shoulder, “I have choir soon.”

This time, Ralph stood in place quietly, and didn’t stop Jack from walking away and leaving, watching as the door shut behind him.

Unlike Jack, Ralph wasn’t sure he was mentally ready to leave yet.

Chapter Text

“Look at you! So handsome!”

Ralph adjusted his tie and smiled brightly towards the woman at his front door, “Thank you, Miss.”

“You look as cute as a button, what’s the special occasion, Ralph?” His neighbor, Mary, who had just dropped by unexpectedly with a basket in her hands asked.

“My school’s having a dance tonight,” Ralph replied. He was trying his best to stay polite, but it was 6:30 in the evening, no responsible person would come around at that time.

Mary put her hand to her chest, “Oh, how precious! I’m sure all the lasses will want to dance with you.”

Ralph shrugged and patted his hair down after Mary took her hand away, smoothing it back out just in case. “What brings you here, Miss Johnson?”

She looked down at the basket in her hands, “Oh I’m just delivering this to Bridgette. Thought she could use it.”

Miss Johnson and Ralph’s mum had become friends even before his mummy had left. Miss Johnson had lost her husband in war, and his mother and her would chat about having a husband who fights in war or what not. It seemed now that she was back, the two became friends once more.

Ralph winced, before clearing his throat, “Uhm, my mother is asleep right now.”

“Oh. I see,” She reached the basket out towards himself. “You wouldn’t mind giving this to her, would you? Tell her I stopped by?”

Ralph took the basket into his hands, grabbing it tightly to secure it. It was a thoughtful gift, the last thing he wanted to do was drop it. “Of course, Miss Johnson.”

“Aw, thank you. Such a sweetheart.” She whispered with a smile. The woman waved politely, before turning and walking away. Ralph shut the door behind her, and took the basket in one hand. As much as he did not want to disturb his mother, he knew she ought to wake up at some point to drive him to his school, so he gulped and walked to her room, opening the door quietly so as not to startle her.

He peeked inside. “Mummy?”

His mother was lying on her bed, no covers on, with her diner uniform still on. Ralph assumed her job must be giving her trouble, because lately she’s seemed very tired and even somewhat sad. His mother lifted her head and looked towards the door where Ralph stood still. “Oh, hi, sweetie.”

Ralph clutched the basket in his hand. “May I come in, mum?”

She nodded, “Of course.”

Ralph stepped in, noticing his mother closed her eyes again and rested her head back on the pillow. If it hadn’t been for the dance he would’ve let her sleep, but he knew they had to get going soon if they wanted to be on time.

“Uh, Miss Johnson stopped by,” Ralph started, “She wanted to give you this.”

He held the basket out to her.

His mother yawned. “How thoughtful of her. Set it on the nightstand, honey.” Ralph nodded and did as he was told, placing it down gently on the stand next to the king size bed his mother lay on. When Ralph turned back to her, she lay with her eyes closed still, breathing in and out calmly.

Ralph remained still for a moment, before working up the heart to say something. “Mummy…”

“Yes dear?” She still did not open her eyes.

“The dance will start soon,” Ralph reminded.

His mother opened her eyes slowly. It took her a few moments before she sat upright and looked down at her lap. She sighed. “Right, of course.” She smiled at her son, “Look at you, getting all fixed up by yourself.” She face contorted suddenly, her gentle smile being replaced by an upsetting frown. “Sorry I wasn’t awake to help. If you need me, don’t hesitate to-“

“It’s alright, mummy,” Ralph assured, putting his hands behind his back.

She sighed softly and smiled to herself. “It’s not.”

Before Ralph could say anything more, his mother hopped out of bed and stretched, before looking at the door and back to her son. “Well, we ought to get going.”

Ralph nodded and followed her out the door. She stayed in her uniform, which confused Ralph, but he supposed it was wearable if she was just staying in the car.

Ralph quickly brushed his teeth one last time, just to be safe. When he spit out the bubbly tooth paste and checked his teeth to make sure they were as clean as could be, he noticed something on his face.

His forehead and cheeks had small red bumps spread out on them. Ralph grimaced. To him, they looked utterly disgusted on his face.

It must’ve been acne. He heard his mother call for him, forcing him to leave before he could properly mourn his once perfect skin.

His mother let Ralph off at the entrance of the Boys school, giving him a peck on the cheek before he left the car.

“Nine o’clock I pick you up, alright? I’ll meet you right back here,” She announced, waving to him, “Bye Ralph, love you.”

He smiled and waved back. “Love you too, Mum.”

Ralph didn’t wait for his mother to drive away before he began walking towards the other side of the school where he could spot his friends already. He raced over as best he could in a suit and joined them in their waiting. He noticed Kane was holding some sort of flower thing in his hand, suddenly recognizing it as a corsage. He cringed knowing it must be for Irene.

“Hey, Ralph!” Sydney greeted.

“Finally you’re here,” Frank said, pulling at his arm, “The girls will be here soon.”

Ralph had almost forgotten a group of girls were going to be accompanying them. He’s sure it wouldn’t affect his time too much, though.

They boys waited together, standing still and occasionally joking around. Ralph felt Frank’s eyes on him, and finally turned to look at him directly.

“What?” Ralph questioned, smiling playfully.

Frank shrugged. “Your face looks funny.”

Ralph opened his mouth to say something, but wasn’t quite sure what to say. Instead he gave an awkward laugh and a quick nod, before turning away.

Ralph folded his arms suddenly and glared over at Frank, unable to let him just get away with saying that. “You have acne too, y’know.”

Frank shifted his eyes towards Ralph and smiled. Just then, two girls could be seen walking over towards them. One was undeniably Irene, in a white flowered dress, and the other was her friend who’d been with her a couple weeks ago when Kane had asked Irene out.

“Hullo!” Irene called out, making eye contact with Kane specifically. Kane’s eyes lit up, as he waved to her excitedly. “Hi!”

As soon as the two girls got close enough, Kane grinned. “You two look beautiful.”

Irene giggled. “You all don’t look too bad yourselves.” She looked over at her friend and chuckled. “Oh, I should introduce you to my friends! This is Shirley,” Irene said, gesturing towards the lass next to her. She had short blonde hair and wore a turquoise dress with buttons on the front.

“Hi…” She grinned nervously and waved to the boys in front of her as they smiled back.

Suddenly, two more girls came walking over at the same time, jogging as fast they could in their dresses and heels.

Irene pointed. “Those two are Nancy and Alice.” She waved at them eagerly.

“Hi! I hope we’re not late,” The chunkier girl said, once coming up upon her two other friends.

“Not at all!” Irene smiled, looking back the the boys. She seemed cheerful.

“Nice to meet you two!” Munish grinned brightly at them.

“This is Munish, Frank, Ralph, and Sydney,” Kane gestured accordingly, as the boys grinned awkwardly back. Or maybe it was just Ralph.

“Shall we set off?” Irene wondered, looking at Kane with a smile.

“Of course,” He held out his arm to her, and she extended hers. Kane took the corsage in his hand and slipped it around her wrist. Irene went crimson and grinned at him. He reached his arm out, almost looking as if he were almost going to elbow her, but she giggled and looped her hand underneath and held his arm.

They began walking, signaling the others to follow. While Nancy, Shirley, and Alice started after them, the remaining boys get pulled back by Frank, as he giggles maliciously, “I bagsy Shirley.”

Munish folded his arms with a sour frown, “Hey, I wanted to dance with her!”

“Too bad,” Frank laughed, patting his head condescendingly. Sydney chuckled as Munish glared at him, Ralph choosing to remain silent.

The group walked towards the Boy’s school gym, leading the girls to where it was, given they’d presumably never been there before. Though it was quite obvious in Ralph’s opinion, given the gym had a line of boys and girls all waiting with anticipation and excitement.

But Ralph? He wasn’t too sure.

Ralph would be having fun, he really would. He knew going into this Kane would be preoccupied with Irene but that was to be expected. She’s the girl he fancies, and he asked her to the dance, so of course he’s going to spend most of his time with her. It’s basically a date, right? And he enjoys the company of his other friends. Munish and Sydney are nice lads to hang around, very funny too. Even Frank, despite their differences, was a well meaning friend nonetheless.

But Ralph soon realized he may have no one to spend his time with at the dance.

Because Frank wasn’t joking when he said he bagsied Shirley. As soon as they got in line he slide up next to her and began complimenting her and just going on about how lovely she was. And being a girl, Shirley blushed and giggled and twirled her dress and what not as Frank grinned, knowing he was successfully wooing a girl.

Ralph was alright with the idea of Frank chatting up Shirley all evening. In fact, he felt a bit guilty for being almost happy Frank would be too busy to talk with him. It would just be Sydney, Munish, and him for the night, and Ralph was more than okay with that.

But then Munish began talking about how he was sure Irene’s other friend, Nancy, had been glancing at him and blushing, to which Sydney said he’s gone bonkers if he thinks a girl would like him.

Munish quickly proved him wrong by going right up to Nancy and asking if she wanted to dance. And she said yes.

But then Munish began talking about how he was sure Irene’s other friend, Nancy, had been glancing at him and blushing, to which Sydney said he’s gone bonkers if he thinks a girl would like him.

There they were, just Sydney and him.

Ralph sighed. He supposed it was better than having no one.

“Well Ralph,” Sydney said, breaking the silence between them, “Looks like it’s just you and me.”

“Yep,” Ralph agreed, awkwardly holding his own arm in an attempt to feel normal.

Sydney looked around, not speaking for a moment. He seemed to be looking for something, or someone, as he disregarded the fair boy for a good second at least. Ralph turned to look at him. “So… what do you want to do.”

Sydney paused for a minute and smiled to himself cheekily. “I want to dance with Alice.”

Ralph jeered. “The chubby one? Really?”

“Oh you shush,” Sydney waved him away with his hand, yet giggled to himself regardless, “She’s pretty.”

“I guess,” Ralph said, trying to find her amongst the crowd, but was unable to locate her. As Ralph looked back at Sydney, he felt his stomach ache. He couldn’t let another one of his friends leave him. Leave him all alone.

As if Sydney could read Ralph’s mind, he patted his shoulder with a smile. “Don’t worry ‘bout it. You’re Ralph Everly, any lass will dance with you. If it hadn’t been for Frank and Munish asking first, they’d probably all have been begging to dance with you.”

Ralph opened his mouth but was unsure what to say. He screwed up his face a bit. “Why do you think that exactly.”

Sydney giggled and motioned towards Ralph. “Have you taken a look in the mirror lately?”

The blond blushed and looked away shyly. “Yeah… y-y’know I have acne now, even Frank-“

“Don’t listen to Frank,” Sydney interrupted, “I love the guy but he’s bonkers. Doesn’t know what he’s talking about half the time.”
Sydney giggled suddenly and leaned in close to Ralph. “And he’s not half as attractive as you.”

If Ralph hadn’t known any better, he’d swear Sydney was trying to chat him up or something.

But because Ralph did know better, he knew it was just a compliment between two blokes. But it still made him smile and blush slightly.

“Well thank you,” The blond thanked, as Sydney grinned back.

“Just the truth, mate,” He looked back towards the other side of the crowded group, grinning ear to ear. Ralph looked too, even if he wasn’t sure what he was looking at.

Suddenly he felt Sydney grab his shoulder intensely, making Ralph jump. The boy kept his eyes in front of himself as he spoke.

“Look,” The strawberry blond said, pointing towards a food table not too far away. Ralph followed Sydney’s gaze but didn’t really see anything else except for other people. He gave Sydney a funny look. “What?”

“That girl. She’s staring at you.” He quickly pointed and Ralph turned. Sydney was probably just joking, right?

But as he looked, he noticed a girl with dark brown hair in a high ponytail gazing at him from the table he had just looked at, before quickly pulling her eyes away as Ralph saw her, fixating on the bowl of lemonade behind her.

“Oh.”

Sydney grinned at him eagerly. “Well?”

“Well what?”

“Go talk to her!” Sydney said enthusiastically, pushing him slightly.

Ralph jeered. “What? No, I don’t even know her!”

“Well get to know her, then.” Sydney laughed in response.

Ralph felt someone grab onto him as he heard them yell “Yeah!”

Ralph didn’t mean to, but he screamed. It wasn’t too loud, but it obviously disturbed a few of those next to them, as he saw them quickly glance at him in confusion or concern. Ralph went crimson in embarrassment. He looked over his shoulder to see who was holding onto him and Sydney.

“Frank, what are you doing? Shouldn’t you be with Shirley?” Ralph asked, voice staggering ever so slightly.

Frank laughed his cheeky laugh. “I had to go to the loo.” He said, “Now man up already and ask her to dance!”

Before Ralph could even get a chance to speak, Frank pushed him, much harder than Sydney had. It made Ralph tumble, causing him to have to catch himself before he lost his balance. He turned over his shoulder to look at Frank. Did that bloke have it in for him or something?

“Go on,” Sydney encouraged in a much softer tone, motioning for him to keep moving. Ralph looked at Frank, expecting him to walk away and return to his own dance partner, but he stood in place, grinning vilely. At least, it was vile to Ralph.

The blond looked back over at that girl his friends were so desperate he talk to. As he turned her way, he raised an eyebrow. She wasn’t that pretty. He looked away for a moment before he looked back and once again caught her staring at him, before she averted his gaze once more, taking a sip of the drink she was holding.

Well, he supposed this wasn’t the worst thing, right? While she wasn’t beautiful, she was cute, nice, and seemed to fancy him, so why wouldn’t he approach her? Besides, with his friends eagerly awaiting him to do something, he felt he had no real choice.

So he gave his friends one last fake smile, one they eagerly approved of as they silently applauded him as the young fools they were and made his way to the unknown lass.

“Hullo,” He said as he got close enough. She spun around and seemed startled by the boys sudden appearance. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you!” Ralph apologized politely.

She shook her head, a faint blush on her cheeks. “No no, it’s ok! Trust me, you didn’t scare me,” She assured.

Ralph gives a fake laugh and sighs to himself. “Uhm- what’s your name?”

The girl's blush grows brighter. “Uh, Julia.” She says with a smile, “What’s yours?”

“Ralph.”

“Nice to meet you, Ralph.”

“You as well.”

There was an awkward moment of silence that made Ralph want to crawl out of his skin. He wasn’t sure what to say, and most of all, he wasn’t sure he wanted to say anything. He wished he could crawl back to Sydney or even Frank, for that matter.

He begins to regret his decision, when he hears a familiar voice. “I love this song!”

He looks towards the voice, seeing Irene and Kane together, hand in hand. A new song had started up, and he recognized it immediately. “Boogie Woogie Bugle Boy”, his mother’s favorite song. Irene pulled Kane closer to her and grinned. The two began dancing excitedly along to the beat, giggling as they did. He saw Frank and Shirley not too far away, along with Munish and Nancy and Sydney and Alice.

It looked picture perfect. One girl, one boy, dancing, crushing, giggling, twisting and twirling together. That’s what Ralph wants. That’s what Ralph needs.

So he looked back at Julia who was still looking at him intently. He gave her a grin and said, “May I have this dance?”

She grinned back immediately, nodding excitedly. “Y-yes! I’d love to!”

Julia took his hand quickly, and the two smiled happily. Ralph sure hoped his friends saw him, holding the girl's hands and dancing with her.

They danced along with the rest of the crowd. They’d take each other's hands and sway along together. Sometimes Ralph would even take one of her hands and twirl her around, to which she’d giggle each time. He began to actually feel more relaxed, as one of them would occasionally slip up or get tired and they’d share a laugh, joking around with one another. It was the most fun he had all night.

But when the song ended and he actually focused on her face, noticing that her cheeks were still shaded pink, it made him uncomfortable. It reminded Ralph this girl was interested in him as more than just a friend.

The two danced to a few more songs, including “ Chattanooga Choo Choo”, which the moment Ralph heard it he wanted to slap himself, as the song was especially long. Julia said “This is my Daddy's favorite song!” And Ralph huffed out an “Oh, really?” and a laugh to insure he was having fun and in no way anxious.

During the next song, he glanced back and forth between Julia and Gordon, as he had recognized him not too long ago. Despite the light not being the best in the gym at the moment, Ralph could still make out Gordon’s light freckles that covered the top of his cheeks. His green eyes almost glowed from how vibrant they were. Gordon spotted him at one point, and waved happily at his friend. Ralph grinned and waved back, unsure if that was all right with Julia. He didn’t really care, either way. Gordon giggled and gestured towards the unknown girl he was with excitedly, much to Ralph’s chagrin.

The song that came on next was a slow one. The boys had taken girls into their arms and began swaying with them slowly, as they both grinned at one another in silence. Ralph always felt that must be awkward to just stare at each other while moving around a slow pace, right?

Well, he was about to find out.

Before Ralph could even ask, Julia brought herself into Ralph’s arms, smiling. Ralph attempted to smile back.

As the song played, Ralph realized this may just be the most uncomfortable moment in his life. While they made contact dancing to the fast songs, they still had their own space. This felt so weird, it simply felt too much for friends to do. Oh. How could he forget? He wasn’t friends with this girl. He likes this girl, and she likes him. That was the way it was, that was the way everything was. All he could do was smile and dance, having Julia staring him down, not taking her eyes off him. Was this meant to be fun?

He tried averting his eyes, looking over. As the two danced, he could faint make out someone familiar dancing in the shadowy light.

Once he could see the bloke's face, he recognized Gordon again, swaying and giggling with excitement as he held a girl in his arms, dancing. It made him heat up, but in an unpleasant way. Gordon and her seemed so… fixated on each other. They looked like the perfect couple.

He felt… embarrassed? Angry?

Well that didn’t make sense. Ralph’s happy for his friend. Gordon talks about girls often, dancing with a girl must be a huge dream come true for him, mustn’t it?

The thought did not cheer him up.

And as if things couldn’t have gotten worse, they did.

Averting his eyes once more, he spotted that same red hair that seemed to almost obscurely stand out everywhere it went. Like it didn’t fit in with the rest. Jack. That was just his luck, wasn’t it?

Unlike Gordon, Jack wasn’t dancing with a girl. Instead he was standing alone, staring at the ground and occasionally the others in the gym. Ralph was surprised by how, well, not surprised he was anymore. It was never pleasant to see Jack, no, but… before, it was a shock. Before, he didn’t expect to see Jack. Now, it felt… normal. That made Ralph want to scoff. Ralph knew Julia still had her eyes on him, but he couldn’t stop glancing back and forth at Jack as he danced with the girl.

“Y’know, I love this song,” Ralph heard Julia say. Ralph temporarily snapped out of it and cleared his throat. “Oh, uhm, yeah- what’s it called?”

“‘That Old Black Magic?’ It’s lovely, innit?” She smiled softly, “My mummy's favorite.”

The same old tingle that I feel inside
And then that elevator starts its ride

Julia sighs, before resting her head on Ralph’s chest, something he doesn’t realize until that moment many other girls have done as well. Ralph’s stomach ached, in a horrible, painful way.

Despite Julia no longer looking at him, her eyes being closed, Ralph still felt eyes on him. He peeked at Gordon, who was paying him no mind, only the lass he was with.

He didn’t have a good feeling as he glanced at Jack quickly.

The ginger was staring at him. And when they made eye contact, his eyes remained for a second. Just a moment. Before he turned away, looking to the ground.

I should stay away, but what can I do?
I hear your name, and I'm a flame
A flame with such a burning desire
That only your kiss can put out the fire

“You know,” Julia spoke, not lifting her head from Ralph’s chest, “This played at my mummy and daddies wedding. It’s their song, they always say…”

Ralph couldn’t do it.

He was a good boy.

But he knew his limits.

And even if he didn’t know why, his limit had been reached.

So as soon as that blasted song ended, he gently forced Julia off of him with a single nudge. She looked up at him in a bit of a confused manner, and Ralph felt a little nervous.

“Forgive me, but I must be off now. My mummy’s picking me up, soon,” Ralph lied, resting his hands on her shoulders. Her eyes softened. “O-oh! Okay, it’s okay! I understand.” Before Ralph could go, she pushed her hair behind her ear and smiled. “T-thank you for dancing with me.“

Ralph nodded hastily. “Mhm, of course, thank you as well.” He saw a grin from her before he turned quickly. He didn’t get very far before he heard one last thing from the poor girl.

“Wait, uh-“ She began, a stagger in her voice, “C-can we hang out again, sometime?”

Ralph looked back, probably looking as if he were to pass out. He must’ve been having another panic attack.

“Y-yeah!” Ralph responded before he took off, and didn’t look back.

As he ran down the gym, he spotted Frank dancing with Shirley to quite the energetic song, and the two looked to be having fun. Ralph prayed Frank wouldn’t spot him as he ran by. Ralph’s prayers were not heard, as Frank eyed the boy and called out, “Hey, where are you going?”, but Ralph did not answer. He wanted to, but he couldn’t stop his legs from continuing to the gym doors. He ran out of the stuffy room and into the fresh night air. It felt like a wave of relief, to be away from the noise and… everyone else. He felt he could finally breathe.

Ralph walked down the path of the boys school, the one that led to the entrance of the building. He stopped at the main doors. He hadn’t actually thought this far. He wanted to get out so bad, but what was he to do now? He couldn’t go back in, he told Julia his mother had come to pick him up. But she wasn’t, so what we he to do? Wait it out?

Wait it out. That was exactly what he was supposed to do.

Well, what he was supposed to do was dance with a girl and banter with his friends, but Ralph knew that was no longer an option that night.

So wait it out it was.

As Ralph walked back to the parking lot, where his mother had dropped him, he felt his breath go heavy again, and anxiety lingering over him. He was going to go home and pretend this whole night never happened, that’s what he ought to do.

But as he aimlessly walked to the front of the parking lot, he saw a familiar glow of bright hair in the darkness that was visible, much too visible for Ralph’s liking.

It was Jack again, wasn’t it? What was he doing out here?

And more importantly, what was Ralph going to do?

His first instinct was to walk away slowly, be quiet and make no noise so he doesn’t realize he’s there. Basically, don’t approach.

But Ralph’s second instinct was to act normal. If it was any other regular bloke, he’d do polite young man would do and say a quick “hi” or “how are you”.’ It was normal, and that’s what Ralph wanted to be. Normal.

So he walked forward carefully, trying to not make too much noise with his steps, as to not startle the redhead.

Ralph appeared next to the taller bloke, and settled his gaze on the cars parked in the lot.

Although, he barely got any time to do so.

Immediately as he settled himself next to Jack, the ginger spun around, the movement making Ralph flinch as he looked beside him to see Jack looking like he’d seen a ghost.

“No, no,” Jack repeated, backing away, pointing at Ralph as if he were a dog the redhead was reprimanding, “Get away!”

Ralph was speechless for a moment. “W-what?”

“Go away!” Jack raised his voice, his face going red. Ralph was startled by the sudden shift in emotion.

“I’m just waiting for my mother, just like you!” Ralph argued, which was technically true. Jack glared is disgust. “Then I’ll leave.”

Jack turned around and began to walk away, true to his word. It shocked the blond. Why was he walking away. Why was he disrespecting Ralph? Just the other day he’d-

Ralph harshly grabbed Jack’s shoulder, desperately pulling him back. “What’s your problem? I’m just trying to be nice, talk with you.”

Jack huffed out loudly, his body tensing up, and for a moment, still images of the island flashed before Ralph, making him want to throw up.

“Don’t you get it, Ralph? Not everything is about you. I don’t want to talk and if I had it my way, I’d never have talk to you ever again!”

Ralph felt something in him ache at the words, “B-but we- but the other day when you were crying, I thought-“

“‘B-but’ ‘I thought’,” Jack mocked, voice dripping with sarcasm as Ralph stood there, almost paralyzed in disbelief, “You thought what? I told you to leave then too, but you didn’t listen. You never listen!”

Before Ralph could process the words, come up with any sort of stuttered response, Jack stepped back and screamed at the top of his lungs.

“I hate you! You ruined my life!”

And with that, he ran away.

Chapter Text

Going into school the next Monday didn’t feel right. Ralph didn’t want to admit he was embarrassed, because how bloody stupid would that be? He was angry, and that wasn’t a lie. The things Jack had said, the way he had treated him made him narked. After the blond had been as kind as to temporarily put aside what had happened, put aside the fact Jack had tried to murder him, and help him through his panic attack-like state, the boy claimed that he had ruined his life.

The complete nerve Jack had to take Ralph’s kindness and spit on it. Ralph didn’t have to be nice. He didn’t have to be polite to him, yet he had out of the goodness of his heart, and that still wasn’t good enough. He wanted to yell at Jack, and he would’ve too, tell him what a bloody git he was and how Jack had ruined his life, not the other way around. But Jack had raced off before Ralph could even take another breath.

Ralph sneered to himself. It was too early in the morning to reminisce about it again. He’d thought about it far too much over the weekend and didn’t want to think about it any longer. It’d ruined his mood over those two days already, he ought to give it a rest at some point.

He sat down in his seat and sighed, resting his head on the table once he realized the teacher was momentarily missing from the classroom. He’d stayed up late the last couple of nights, not because of Jack or anything, but because his mother couldn’t sleep and would make a ruckus because of it. Her tossing and turning would be loud, and kept Ralph awake for hours, until she finally fell asleep. It was probably the result of her sleeping during the day once she got back from her work, but Ralph doesn’t want to reprimand his mother.

Someone taps his head and he rises instantaneously at the touch.

“Hey, Ralph. What are you doing?” Gordon asks, leaning against his chair. Ralph nuzzles his chin back into his arms, still making eye contact with the boy. Even if he was tired, he still needed to be polite. “Nothing.”

“You seem tired,” Ralph shrugs as best he can from his position, and notices Gordon’s sudden mischievous expression. “Well, maybe this’ll wake you up.”

Ralph sat up as Gordon leaned into his satchel, resting it on his lap as he scattered through it. Once Gordon found his item of interest, he put his index finger over his mouth and leaned forward towards Ralph. The fair boy looked at him in bemusement as he took something out of his satchel.

“Happy late Birthday, Ralph,” He whispered, handing the blond his present. Ralph took it into his hands upon the implication it was for him. “Sorry I didn’t get it to you sooner, I had, erm, a little trouble retrieving it again.” If it hadn’t been for Gordon’s sly smile, Ralph probably wouldn’t have been so nervous to examine just what his gift was.

Ralph gazed at the object he was holding. It was a… magazine? It looked odd though, it certainly wasn’t one Ralph recognized. He found the cover to be strange, as well.

At first glance, he thought this was a magazine for girls, as there was a picture of a bikini in what looked to be sand. You could see a woman’s legs at the top, and a random, almost misplaced looking full body picture of a woman at the bottom in said bikini.

Ralph was moments away from turning to Gordon and asking him if this was some type of joke, one he was most definitely not in the mood for.

However, upon further examination, it seemed he was completely incorrect. Right at the top, it read that the magazine was, in fact, “entertainment for men”.

“Gordon…” He laughed, trying to cover his bewilderment, “What is this?”

“Open it,” Was all he replied, with that same cheeky smile on his face. When Ralph hesitated, he continued, saying, “Any page, open it. I think you’ll like it. Just… be quiet, alright?”

Ralph nodded and looked back down at his gift. He took a quick breath and opened up a random page, just as Gordon had instructed.

Ralph was immediately greeted by an image so strong and obvious he wasn’t sure he’d ever be able to get it out his head.

The moment his eyes met with the picture before him, he was looking at an image of a woman’s full naked body.

Ralph gasped loudly and shut the magazine with horror at what he had just been exposed to. Apparently, he had been much too loud for Gordon’s taste, because he shushed him right away.

“Shush, shh!” He whispered-shouted again, “You don’t want to draw attention to us!”

“Gordon, w-where did you get this?” Ralph managed to stutter out, attempting to regain himself.

“My daddy! He went to the Americas not that long ago, and he brought back a few of those,” He gestured to the distasteful magazine, “Mummy found them, though, and told him to throw em’ out. He snuck them back though, in his safe, I just needed to find a way to open it.”

Ralph shook his head strongly, “W-wow, ok, er…”

“So, whatcha think?” Gordon asked, resting his head on his hands. Ralph starred in obscure amusement. “What? No, no no, I can’t have this! I mean-“

Gordon’s smile turned to a frown quickly upon Ralph’s reaction, “Why? I like em’, my daddy liked em’.”

“I don’t!” Ralph announced, a bit too stridently, so he lowered it quickly, “I just- m-my mummy might find it, she’ll go bonkers if she does!”

“Oh, well that’s alright! Just hide it somewhere she won’t, like my daddy!” Gordon said happily, “Trust me, you might wanna have that one day.”

Ralph looked at him, muddled by his vagueness. “What do you mean?”

The boy shrugged innocently but the grin that appeared on his face once more looked rather roguish.

“You may need a little something too, y’know…” Gordon made an odd face, and averted his eyes, “If you wanna indulge.”

“I don’t need this for anything,” Ralph said rapidly, pushing the magazine back over to Gordon. He wasn’t sure what the boy was talking about, and he didn’t think he wanted to. Gordon took it in his hands, and his baffled expression changed to that roguish smile again, one that seemed so innocent, but in reality was anything but.

“Ohhh, is it because you got that lass you were dancing with last Friday? Don’t want to think about anyone else but her?” Gordon commented, making Ralph sputter.

“Gordon, what the bloody hell are you talking about?”

“What, you don’t know?”

“I wouldn’t be asking if I bloody knew!”

Gordon fixed his posture at the sudden arrival of the teacher, who went straight for her desk and plopped down with a stack of papers in hand.

“Hey, what are you two talking about?” Kane whispered from next to Ralph, which made the fair boy jolt.

“Just trying to give him a present,” Gordon sneakily showed a bit of the magazine for Kane to peek at.

“That looks like a girls magazine.”

“Oh, it has girls in it,” Gordon giggled.

Kane’s eyes widened, “Is it one of those…” Gordon nodded, and Kane had to control his laughter. “Ralph, take it! You’re lucky to get it. I wish Gordon would give me the same generosity.” The green eyed boy slapped his shoulder playfully.

“B-but why? It’s so… roguish.”

“Duh, that’s the point,” Kane says blankly, “You’re supposed to jerk off to it.”

Gordon zipped his head towards him, putting his index finger to his mouth, “Kane!”

“Sorry, sorry!” Kane replied, before he began to chuckle to himself.

Ralph looked on in pure bewilderment. “What?”

“You know, where you touch your private area,” Kane explained nonchalantly, “Or you could do what I do, and use your pillows.”

Gordon frowned and shushed the boy, “Shut up, you dimwit!”

Ralph was in complete disbelief that his two friends were being so brazen about fiddling with their private parts. What did Kane even mean when he said “use your pillows”?

Ralph was too panicked and appalled to ask further questions. “Just take it back, Gordon, I don’t want it.”

The boy sighed to himself in annoyance. “Really? You’re sure?”

Ralph nodded, and Gordon shrugged in response. “Your loss.”

“Oh, by the way,” Kane spoke suddenly, turning to Ralph as the teacher stood up. “Some bloke from my Mathematics class came to me this morning saying he wanted help on his homework, so I told him to go to you.”

“Erm, you did?”

“Yeah, I don’t even remember his name, but he says he knows you. So keep an eye out for him, alright?”

Ralph shuddered to himself, and looked on in confusion. “Why would you recommend me?”

“Because I didn’t want to deal with him,” Kane replied with a laugh, but tried to suppress it when he saw Ralph glare at him, “Sorry, mate!”

Ralph turns back to his desk, slamming his head on the table, and groans.

Classes were especially boring that day. It was Monday, so the teachers were demanding homework whilst giving it out. After dinner with his friends, and having to put up with Kane’s excessive rambling about how Irene kissed his cheek once the dance ended, he made it to Mathematics. Even his teacher Miss Brown had taken notice of how much better Ralph had begun doing in the subject, praising him for his more than sufficient work.

Never did Ralph think doing better in a subject would put him at a disadvantage.

Once class ended, and the boys began packing their bags and leaving, Ralph heard Miss Brown from across the room.

“Mr. Everly, come here for a moment, will you?”

Ralph turned around and put his satchel in his seat that he had once occupied, as he nodded to the woman and came her way. “What is is, Miss Brown?”

“You have been just such a dear, lately. So well behaved and such a smart young man,” She complimented, making Ralph blush with pride, “You are definitely one of my best students this year.”

Ralph grinned with giddy, “Thank you, Miss.”

She continued. “I applaud you, Ralph, I really do. Which is why I think you could be of great assistance.” Ralph nodded slightly as a signal he was listening. She smiled. “You see, there is this bloke, Jack Merridew.” Ralph’s stomach dropped at the mention of the boy. “He’s in my morning period, and… well-“

She hesitated, putting her finger to her lip, “He’s not in the best conditions in my classroom, as of late. Unlike you, he is falling behind quickly.” Ralph got a sour feeling, nodding again even if he wasn’t sure he wanted to hear the rest. “So you see, I was wondering if you’d be willing to help out, give him some help on his homework, perhaps? He’s been-“ She hesitated again, “He just hasn’t been doing very well.”

Ralph was stunned, trying to articulate the best excuse for why he couldn’t, so as to not disappoint his teacher. She was probably the nicest teacher had, she’d understand if he had a valid excuse.

But seconds passed by and Ralph quickly realized he couldn’t conjure up a fib fast enough, so being trained to always do as adults say, his mouth moved for him.

“Alright.”

She clapped her hands together. “Wonderful! Do you have any classes with Mr. Merridew?”

Ralph nodded. “Last period.”

“Perfect, you two can work together after school,” Miss Brown told, writing something down in her notebook before looking back up at him. “That’s alright with you?

No, no tell her it’s not, just say it’s not.

“Of course, miss.”

The woman put her hand to her chest and exhaled deeply. “Oh thank goodness!” Miss Brown looked back down and jotted in her notebook once more. “Thank you, Mr. Everly! You may take a seat.”

Ralph turned back towards his desk. He couldn’t believe the mess he had just committed too.

P.E was to be awkward for sure. When Ralph turned to glance at Jack upon entering the locker rooms, the ginger wouldn’t return his look. It was like he was completely invisible. Though, when Ralph gave it more thought, Jack never looked at him when the fair boy did in the locker room. In fact, Jack may not even know Ralph eyes him when he passes by.

Jack really was serious when he said he didn’t want to talk to Ralph more than he had too. And Ralph tried to convince himself the only emotion he felt as a result of that was anger.

That day, a new boy had come to their P.E class named Osip, who had a thick Russian accent. Osip chose the locker right next to Clive and Ralph, and the two boys had found Osip’s accent to be quite humorous and giggled quietly to themselves when he’d speak.

Despite them thinking his accent was silly, they were still friendly. Clive especially. Clive, being the blabbermouth he was, chatted with him whilst changing. Once he was done, he even showed Osip some weird thing he could do with his arm.

“Look at this!” Clive shouted excitedly. Realizing he had Osip’s attention, he put his hand on the bench behind him. His arm began to bend, but a different way than it was supposed to, bending the opposite way.

This promptly disturbed both boys watching, as Osip squawked out, “Ew!”. Clive laughed and returned his arm to normal.

“How’d you do that?” Ralph asked, still taken aback by the gross body movement. Clive shrugged with a grin. “Dunno. Just can, I s’pose.”

“We should get going,” Osip suggested, tapping Clive on the shoulder when they were all done.

Clive nodded. “Sure, c’mon Ralph!”

Osip and Clive took off and Ralph went after them, purposefully keeping behind them as he didn’t feel quite in the mood for talking. He felt much more like remaining to himself and keeping quiet.

“Hey,” Someone shouts after him from behind. Ralph can hear the person's footsteps, and turns around to look at them.

The voice should’ve been a dead giveaway of who it was, and to an extent, it was. But it didn’t truly hit Ralph who was behind him until he was facing him.

“Hey, Ralph, wait,” Jack yells after him, going faster after realizing Ralph as stopped, yet only in confusion.

“W-wh- what do you want?” Ralph stuttered out, trying to backup but Jack only stepped closer upon coming face to face with him.

“Erm, I-“ Jack hesitated, trying to find his words. The two stood there for a moment, in silence as Jack looked at his fingers as he fidgeted uncontrollably. Ralph was too disoriented to speak.

“You know Friday?” Jack finally got out, lifting his head up and making eye contact with Ralph, “The dance?”

“Yes,” Ralph replied quietly and swiftly, unsure why Jack would wave him down just to remind him about that night. “I haven’t said a word to you.”

“No, I understand that, I’m not daft,” Jack grumbled, raising his voice slightly, before clearing his throat, “I just wanted to say, that-“

Jack paused once again. He coughed and swallowed before finishing. “I didn’t mean it.”

Ralph really wasn’t sure what he was to say in return. “Oh.”

“I- I’m-“ Jack spoke quietly, "I didn't mean it.”

“You’ve told,” Ralph let the words come out bitterly.

“Yeah,” Jack replied, putting his hands behind his back.

“Is that all?” Ralph asked, trying to nonchalantly step back to not trigger Jack’s rage. Ralph was hoping maybe Jack wouldn’t bring up the school work if he didn’t.

“No, it’s not.”

“Then just get on with it.”

“Did Miss Brown talk to you?”

“Yes,” Ralph responded quietly, thinking he looked away, maybe that meant it wasn’t happening.

Jack squirmed, and Ralph had to resist scoffing at the fact that Jack was the one who was visibly uncomfortable. “Well?”

The blond opened his mouth and tried to form words, but he found it difficult to speak. Jack sighed harshly. “I just need help. I need to improve my grades, my-“ The redhead stopped again suddenly. “You don’t have to, and I don’t expect you to. But… I need someone to assist me.”

Ralph glared at his own feet, wanting to hit himself for allowing his anxiety to get the best of him, for letting himself say yes to something he did not want to do. Miss Brown was a teacher, that was true. But Kane had said no, had he not? “I… I guess I can help.”

Ralph wasn’t sure what was wrong with him. Obviously, this was insane.

But he was safe, wasn’t he? He and Jack had been friends, right? Not like they could be friends again, but-

Ralph wasn’t sure what he was talking about.

Jack opened his mouth slightly and nodded slowly. “Ok. Er, ok,” He said, still having an uneasy expression on his face. “Should I go over to your home?”

Ralph looked up briskly in disturbance, unsure if he had heard correctly at how completely mad the sentence was. “My home?”

“Yes, your home,” Jack confirmed, scratching at the back of his neck, avoiding the fair boy’s eyes, "Where else would we go?”

Ralph paused. Somehow he was willing to spend time with Jack, doing more homework than he should have to after a mediocre apology, and yet somehow going over his house was crossing the line. What was wrong with him?

“I just rather we not,” Ralph spoke honestly, trying not to stutter on his words. Jack looked back at him finally. “Can we not just go-” Ralph stopped in his tracks. He was going to suggest going to the library, that was until he remembered the bloke that hung around with his mother. Ralph shivered and fidgeted uncontrollably. “Never mind.”

Jack put his fingers to his lip and bit one of his nails, something Ralph recalled he did quite often on the island. “Come to my house.”

Jack said it with such demand in his voice it made Ralph jerk back momentarily, before he hastily straightened himself back out. The gingers eyes had noticeably narrowed, but clenched his fist before quickly letting it go and huffing out a deep breath.

“Well?”

Chapter Text

On second thought, maybe it had been Ralph who had received brain damage from the island.

Because by the end of P.E, he found himself not in the back seat of his mother's car but on the side of the school, waiting for Jack’s Uncle to pick them up. Of course, Ralph could not just leave without telling his mother of his whereabouts, so he briefly left in search of her car. However, he found it was nowhere in sight.

He didn’t have much time to question this, as soon he heard Jack loudly calling his name. “Ralph!” He yelled from the other side of the parking lot, motioning him to come back as Ralph turned around.

As Ralph approached the vehicle waiting in front of Jack, he was blown away by just how fancy the car was. It was one of the more expensive cars, one not too many families even around their area owned. Inside, a man rolled down his window with a huge grin on his face, directed right at Ralph.

“Ello, fella!” He greeted happily, giving him an enthusiastic nod, “S’good to meet ya, I’m Jack’s Uncle!”

Ralph had a stiff smile at the red-headed man in front of him. Despite also being ginger, Jack and his uncle looked nothing alike. Both eyes were blue, but a different shade, his uncle lacked freckles like Jack’s and not even their accents sounded the same.

Ralph cleared his throat. “Pleased to meet you, uhm…”

“Just call me Ivor, lad,” The man said warmly.

Ralph gulped, brushing his hair back, and tried not to tremble as he asked, “U-Uhm, are you sure?” Calling an adult by their first name certainly wasn’t anything Ralph was used to.

Jack’s uncle chuckled, “Of course! You’re Jack’s pal, right?”

Ralph tried to pretend he didn’t know Jack had begun staring at him once his uncle uttered those words, as if he was waiting to see what Ralph’s reply would be too. The fair boy could only give a nervous laugh in response and he rubbed his shoulder. The boy's uncle smiled at his nephew and then back at Ralph. “Wonderful!” He pointed to the back seat, “Get in boys!”

Jack wasted no time opening the car door, slipping in quickly. Ralph followed after him, the absurdity of the situation not quite hitting him yet it seemed.

As Ralph settled into the plush backseat of the car, he couldn't help but feel out of place in the extravagance of it. The seats were much more comfortable than any he had sat in before, and the air conditioning was set to a temperature that was made the atmosphere chilly. He shivered and wrapped his arms around himself, trying to get as comfortable as he could.

"So, Ralph, what brings you here today?" Ivor asked, glancing at him in the rearview mirror. His eyes glanced bath and forth at the road as he spoke.

Ralph flinched, startled by the sudden attention. He had been lost in thought, staring out the window at the scenery that passed by as they drove. "Oh, um, I'm just helping Jack with Mathematics," he said, rubbing the back of his head timidly.

"Ah, Mathematics," Ivor said, nodding sagely. "I remember those days,” He glanced at his redheaded nephew, “I’ve never been too good at Maths myself. I was always more of a history man."

Ralph smiled weakly, not sure what to say.

But then Ivor turned his attention back to the road. He began telling Ralph about the history of the area, pointing out landmarks and places he found noteworthy. Ralph listened, fascinated despite himself. It was clear that Ivor loved this place, and he wanted to share that love with others. Despite Ivor’s admirable passion, Ralph could see Jack roll his eyes, resting his elbow against the window.

As they drove further and further from the school, the landscape began to change. The houses became larger and more spread out, surrounded by sprawling lawns and hedges. Ralph had never seen anything like it before. It was like they had entered another world entirely.

Ralph held his breath as they turned into a long stretch of beautiful homes, feeling a thrill of anticipation and apprehension. This was it. This was where Jack lived.

Ralph saw the house for the first time as they pulled in and kept driving, right into the driveway of the last house. It was enormous, with multiple stories and more windows than he could count. The front lawn was like a golf course, perfectly manicured and dotted with flower beds. Ralph felt his jaw drop in amazement.

"This is your home?" he asked, turning to Jack with wide eyes.

Jack shrugged, looking a little sheepish. "Yeah, it's too not bad, huh?"

"Not bad," Ralph repeated, still in awe. "That’s certainly one way of saying it."

Ivor chuckled. "Yes, it is quite the place, isn't it? My brother and his wife are-“ he cut himself off by clearing his throat, “Er, but y’know right now is nothing compared to its beauty in the spring. You must come back then, Ralph, when the flowers are in full bloom. It's breathtaking."

Ralph nodded, feeling a little overwhelmed seeing such a house, with all its beauty and scenery. And that wasn’t even mentioning the fact that Ralph was purposefully trying not to think about just exactly where less than a year ago he had been, where he was, and what he was doing now.

As they pulled up to the front door and Ivor helped them out of the car, Ralph made a mental note to keep his wits about him. He had no idea what he was getting into.

As they walked up towards the grand mansion, Ivor turned around to address the two boys walking behind him. "Well, here we are, lads!”

Ralph looked up in awe at the grandeur of the house. "Wow, this is an amazing house," he exclaimed.

Jack forced a wealthy smile, "Yeah, it's alright," he replied simply.

As they walked up to the front door, Ivor took out a set of keys from his front pocket, before unlocking the door and opening it for the two boys, "Come on in, Ralph," he said, gesturing for them to enter. The fair boy complied after a moment of hesitation, before walking slowly and carefully through the large door.

Once inside, Ralph was struck by how immaculately clean and well-decorated the house was, not only that but just by how huge it was. His own house wasn’t small, not necessarily, but compared to Jack’s it probably looks like nothing.

As Jack and Ivor lead the way into the mansion, Jack keeping right behind Ivor as he spoke about certain things in the house, Ralph couldn't help but feel a sense of unease. He still couldn’t shake the uncomfortable feeling of walking around in this mansion that was so extravagant he felt he was far too out of place being in its presence.

Jack, on the other hand, seemed completely nonchalant. Which objectively made sense, it was his mansion after all.

He led them through the living room and into the kitchen, where Jack began rummaging through his fridge.

"Sorry, it's a tad scruffy in here," Jack said, pulling out a bottle of soda. "I don't really know how to cook, so I just eat out mostly." Ivor grimaced and clicked his tongue disapprovingly, leaning against the counter as he eyed the junk food in dissatisfaction. "We'll have to get you some proper food when we get to my place, then.” Ralph looked on in surprise. Looking at all the junk food in the fridge, you would’ve thought Jack would have gained noticeable weight in some areas. But he didn’t, he was still as skinny as he always was.

As Jack went to unscrew the bottle cap of his coke, Ivor spoke up, “Aye, take it easy with the soda, Shay,” Jack paused what he was doing and looked up at his Uncle in bewilderment, before groaning and folding his arms, “I haven’t had any today. Besides, we have a guest,” Jack argued to his Uncle.

Ivor chuckled and nodded, “Fair enough, but just one, you got that? Now, be a good host and offer one to our guest,” The man gestured towards Ralph. Jack turned to look at him before handing the soda out and raising his eyebrow, shaking it slightly. Ralph looked on nervously, fidgeting where he stood, “Uhm, ok, I’ll have some. Thank you.” Ralph peeked into the fridge and quickly pulled out a bottle of Fanta, giggling nervously as he did so.

As Jack went back to unscrewing his soda bottle, Ivor looked towards him with a grin. “Now you make sure it’s just one, ight?” The man said, gesturing towards his nephew. Ralph shuddered and nodded with an awkward laugh.

Once Jack was finished, he took a long sip of drink, before turning to his Uncle carefully. While Ralph screwed open his soda, he heard Jack whisper something to the man, before hearing Ivor’s loud chuckle behind him. Ralph turned around slightly to see Ivor rustling Jack’s hair, “Kids these days, so insecure about everything. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, Shay.” The man laughed and patted Jack’s back endearingly, although Jack didn’t display anywhere near the number of enthusiastic mannerisms his Uncle did.

Ralph was confused at what they were talking about, but he tried to brush it off and remind himself it was truly none of his business. The fair boy looked around the kitchen, taking in the high-end appliances and the neatly organized pantry, and couldn't help but feel jealous of Jack's seemingly perfect life.

As they entered Jack's room, Ralph couldn't help but feel a sense of excitement wash over him unexpectedly. The room was much larger than his own, with a large four-poster bed dominating the space around him. The walls were lined with shelves filled with books and small and big knick-knacks and other items, and there was even a small sitting area near the window that was cushioned with pillows to make for some comfort when you wanted to just lounge around and read or talk about anything in particular.

Jack threw his satchel onto his bed, letting out a tired sigh as he slumped down onto his soft-looking mattress. Ralph was unsure if it would be appropriate if he plumped down onto the bed too, and decided it was better not to test his limits.

Jack grumbled and sat upright on the bed, slipping his blazer off and dropping it carelessly over at the window's sitting area before flopping down again, the back of his head hitting the pillow. "I'm so exhausted." He groaned, eyes closed and arms crossed over his chest as he let himself relax into the softness of his bed.

Ralph shifted his weight into his left leg awkwardly, unsure of how he was to respond. This was all too... casual. Almost a year ago Jack had been trying to murder him, and now here he was, in Jack's bedroom about to help him with math homework. It was bloody insane and yet Ralph felt as if he had no other choice.

As Ralph continued to take it all in, Ivor appeared at the door, car keys jingling in his hands. "Alright, lads, I outta get back to the girls, you two need anything before I leave?"

Jack shot up from his position, eyes wide and cheeks slightly flushed. "No, we're alright." Ivor nodded, eyeing both boys with a smile, "Good, and Jack, if you can, start packing whilst you do your homework, okay? Gotta get ready, you're coming over today."

Jack looked like he didn't want to agree but finally decided to nod back. "Yeah. Yeah, I'll see you later, Uncle Ivor." And with that Ivor grinned, and said a quick, "Love you, Shay. Be back in a couple hours, and behave yourself. Don't do anything I wouldn't do!" before he was gone with a chuckle, closing the door behind him as he left for his car.

Jack's face reddened in embarrassment as Ivor's words echoed in the room, and Ralph could only stand there, staring at the door in shock. Ivor was... leaving them? All alone in the house? But he couldn’t just- why would he- there was no way this was happening right now, right?

Ralph's chest began to tighten, his palms getting clammy as sweat broke out across his brow, his anxiety building up inside of him. The last time he and Jack had been alone without adult supervision, Jack had ended up trying to hurt him. Was he trying to get himself hurt, or worse, killed?

His thoughts were racing as he struggled to regain control of his breathing. Jack
seemed frozen where he sat on the bed, looking all except for his long legs swinging freely as he stared at the ground, trying to hide his embarrassment.

Ralph was completely stuck in this situation. There was no getting out of it.

Ralph sighs out loudly, deciding he needs to be the one to start a conversation. "So, what do you want to do first?" He asked, peering over at Jack on the bed. The ginger raised his head, then grabbed the sides of his school vest and threw it onto his window area along with his blazer. He stared off into space for a minute, before quietly saying, "Math. If we hurry I can start packing."

And with that, he got hopped off his bed, reaching for his satchel he left on the floor. He grabbed a few papers, as Ralph awkwardly loomed over him. Ralph began to feel hot and took off his blazer, discarding it Jack had left his. Finally, Jack collected what he needed and turned to look at Ralph.

“Uhm… so….” He nodded over to his sturdy bed, “Wanna study on my bed or…?”

Ralph felt his cheeks heat up at Jack’s offer. He wasn’t sure why, but suddenly his surroundings seemed very warm and crowded, and Jack was close - too close, in fact, to his face.

He and Jack were alone, in his huge mansion. The knowledge that there was no one else to watch them shifted from terrifying to riveting. The fact Ralph began to feel himself get giddy startled him greatly. Ralph tried desperately not to focus too much on the warmth of his skin, as he shook his head nervously, stammering out an answer, “Er, maybe we should just- er- study on your desk, right? We have a more secure surface there."

Jack stared at him for a moment longer than he should have, making Ralph blurt out, “Wouldn’t you agree?”

Jack slowly nodded, “Right,” before breaking eye contact to pull over an extra chair to the desk. It was large and cushioned, but despite its size, it didn’t seem like Jack had too much trouble pushing it over. Ralph pulled out a few things from his satchel before discarding them next to Jack’s blazer.

As Jack and Ralph both sat down, Ralph couldn’t help feeling very uncomfortable, even in the soft chair he was sitting in. Jack flipped through some papers, and Ralph finally decided to speak. “So… I- what first?”

Jack pushed a paper in between the two of them. “This.”

Ralph looked at the paper, seeing about 15 problems on it. “And this,” Jack continued, flipping over the paper to reveal another set of 15 problems. Ralph gulped nervously. At the very least, it seemed to be stuff he knew and wasn’t too bad at. So he grabbed his pencil and looked at the first problem carefully.

“Er- alright,” Ralph started, pointing his pencil at the very first problem, reading it aloud. "If a train leaves King's Cross Station at 9:00 AM and travels north at a speed of 60 miles per hour, and another train leaves Euston Station at 9:30 AM and travels south at a speed of 70 miles per hour, at what time and at what distance from King's Cross Station will they meet?"

Ralph looked over expectedly at Jack, only to see his blank expression as he looked at the worksheet. Jack blushed, scratching his arm and avoiding the fair boy's eyes as he spoke, “I don’t know.” He gave an awkward shrug.

Ralph nodded and flipped through his math book, studying all the details as he worked through it in his mind. "W-well, it's not too difficult," Ralph started, looking back at the paper, "You can use the formula distance = rate x time. T can be the time it takes for the two trains to meet. The distance traveled by the first train is 60t miles, while the distance traveled by the second train is 70 miles since the second train leaves 30 minutes after the first train. Setting these distances equal to each other and solving for T, you get T = 3 hours. Therefore, the time they meet must be 12:00 PM, and the distance from King's Cross Station is 180 miles. Okay?"

As Ralph turned to look at Jack, he saw the redhead was looking right into his eyes, his expression unreadable. Finally, his face screwed up as he blurted out, "What?"

Ralph looked back at the worksheet and frowned. This was going to take longer than he thought.

It took nearly half an hour, and multiple attempts of explaining to Jack, to finally make him understand the basic formulas of the equations. By the time he managed to explain it, Ralph's anxiety and fear of the situation were outweighed by his boredom and irritation. He didn't know how teachers did it, every day for hours on end, repeating the same thing over and over again.

Jack didn't seem any more excited, either, especially when he remembered they still had the actual homework to do. With a heavy sigh, Ralph turned his head to Jack, "So... you understand how we got that then, right?"

Jack shrugged, "Yeah I guess." Ralph nodded, looking back at the worksheet again, "So, you wanna do the second problem now?"
The redhead picked up his coke and took a swing of it, before resting it back down, "Can we take a break?"

Ralph shook his head, "We've barely done any work. We need to at least finish this, first."

Jack mumbled quietly to himself, before turning and asking, “Alright. What’s next?”

Ralph traced his finger over the problem carefully, “A local pizza shop offers a 10-inch pizza for 4 shillings and 6 pence and a 14-inch pizza for 7 shillings and 6 pence. Which pizza has a better price per square inch?”

Jack paused for a moment, appearing to think about it at least a bit before shrugging, “I dunno.”

Ralph glared at him, before letting out a sigh and putting his index finger down on his page, right next to the question, “Ok, fine. Let's just... solve it this way..."

But Jack seemed to be staring off into space, lost in his own world, and Ralph wondered if they'd ever get this done by the time Ivor got back. The last thing he wanted was to have to continue these tutor services, forced to take another trip over to Jack's bloody mansion.

Suddenly, Ralph felt a light touch on his arm, causing him to jump in his seat.

"Sorry," Jack said, retracting his hand. "I just needed to stretch my arm."

Ralph shook his head, “Mhm,” He mumbled quickly, returning his attention back to the question, as it seemed Jack did too.

Ralph attempted to work with Jack on how to do the math correctly, even if he was simultaneously trying to speak as little as possible. It was just so frustrating, every aspect of it.

The fair boy took careful sips of his soda, unlike Jack, who quickly took chugs of it at a time. It wasn’t long before Jack abruptly got up out of his seat, bottle in his hands.

Ralph turned to him, “Where are you going?”
“The kitchen,” Jack replied, and it was just then Ralph realized the bottle in his hands was empty. “I’m just gonna get another one.”

Ralph shifted uncomfortably, “Y-You’re Uncle said to just have one…”

Jack shrugged his shoulders, “He’s not here.” Jack paused for a minute, before making a face, his lips pursing, “What, you gonna tell on me?”

Before Ralph could even think for himself, he shook his head frantically, only stopping when Jack’s face went back to normal.

“N-no, of course not! I just- your Uncle-“ Ralph stuttered frantically, trying to articulate his thoughts while Jack stared at him, empty bottle in one hand and the other resting on his door handle. Ralph went silent, unsure of what to say. He was making a fool of himself, being such a jittery wreck.

Jack quickly dismissed Ralph’s worries and left for a couple of minutes, leaving the blond in complete silence. The fair boy took a moment to truly take in his surroundings, contemplating everything that had led to this moment.

Miss Brown better be bloody thrilled with him after this.

Ralph soon heard the door swing open and jumped in his seat, looking back to see the ginger-haired boy at the door. He was holding not only another bottle of coke but also a thick portable radio in his other.

"What are you doing with that?" Ralph asked timidly, almost afraid it was Jack's weapon that he was going to slap him over the head with if he turned around.

Jack lifted the radio up, "What kind of question is that?" He snarled, walking over to the desk and placing it down carefully. Jack flipped the knob up and adjusted it precisely. Ralph leaned over, “Are you listening to the BBC?”

Jack scoffed and rolled his eyes. “No. They don’t play any of the songs I like.”

Ralph grimaced at Jack’s distasteful manner, “How can that be?”

He shrugged, “Banned them, I think.”

“Oh,” Was truly all Ralph found he could respond with.

Finally, Jack landed on a music station. Once satisfied, he sat back down next to Ralph, picking up his pencil once more.

Ralph frowned distastefully, "You sure you’ll be able to focus with that?”

Jack ignored him, tapping his pencil repeatedly. Ralph sighed, knowing Jack was too stubborn to do what he told him to do. Even if Ralph knew what was better for him.

Ralph pulled the paper closer to himself and worked out the problem in his head, but it became increasingly harder as he listened to the voices on the radio speak loudly, laughing ecstatically. It all seemed much less professionally ran than the BBC, and the blond couldn’t think of any reason why Jack would prefer it.

“Alright, enough babbling,” The man said over the radio, “It's time for some of the finest rhythm and blues to get your toes tapping and your hips shaking. So without further ado, we bring you the legendary Big Joe Turner and his hit single 'Shake Rattle and Roll!”

Ralph saw as Jack’s sour resting face morphed into an almost ecstatic grin. He tapped his finger impatiently. “My parents would never allow me to listen to this,” Jack informed, cheekily smiling to himself, almost as if Ralph wasn’t there.

Ralph hadn’t seen Jack like this in so long. The child-like giddiness and almost innocent expression that made him question if he was hallucinating.
Jack listened as the instruments played, but by the time the first words were sung, Jack was out of his chair and jumping around like a carefree youth.

Get outta that bed, wash your face and hands
Get outta that bed, wash your face and hands
Well, you get in that kitchen, make some noise with the pots 'n pans

Ralph watched as Jack danced along to the music, like the fair boy wasn’t sitting there completely baffled in front of him. Jack clapped his hands and spun around to the beat of the song, and it didn’t take Ralph long to realize Jack wasn’t that bad at dancing.

Jack danced energetically, sometimes having more energy than even the song. He was singing along as well, but with a much lower register and no melody to accompany the sounds. He looked a bit silly, actually.

Way you wear those dresses, the sun comes shinin' through Way you wear those dresses, the sun comes shinin' through I can't believe my eyes, all that mess belongs to you

“That doesn’t really match the song, y’know,” Ralph murmured from his seat, feeling his lip twitch slightly upwards.

Jack finally acknowledged his presence, “What doesn’t?”

“Your dancing, it’s all wrong.”

At that, Jack froze for a second, making Ralph momentarily regret saying what he said, before Jack quickly regained his composure and started towards Ralph with a cheeky grin, “Yeah, okay,” he responded dismissively, before reaching out his hand, “Wanna try?”

Ralph gulped nervously, “Um... No, that wouldn’t be necessary-“

“Yes it is,” Jack retorted, leaning down over the desk. The ginger nonchalantly reached his hand out and placed it on Ralph’s thigh, causing the fair boy to tense up immediately.

Ralph swallowed again, feeling a slight warmth radiate off of Jack’s hand, and tried hard to ignore it.

Jack carefully moved his hand and laid it out for Ralph to take. It seemed Jack was, for some reason, persistent on this idea.

Ralph knew this was ludicrous, complete idiocy on his part. Dancing with Jack should be the last thing he wants to do.

And yet, as Jack’s other hand subtly brushes up against his hand, Ralph feels a spark of energy rush through him. Energy that was too strong to deny.

Ralph grabbed Jack’s hands eagerly, so eager it visibly surprised Jack, but he didn’t comment on it. Instead, Jack let Ralph guide him into a rhythmic movement, one that fits the song much better.

But truthfully, Ralph couldn’t have cared less about that

It should’ve been scary. It should’ve been nauseating. But no.

It was exhilarating.

The way their hands touched, dancing to the upbeat music like nothing else mattered, not even that bloody math homework, or Ivor and his soda rules. Nothing

I'm like a one-eyed cat peepin' in a seafood store
I'm like a one-eyed cat peepin' in a seafood store

Jack’s hand grazed Ralph’s hip, which made sense, they were doing The Jive after all. But when it happened Ralph could barely breathe.

I get over the hill and way down underneath
I get over the hill and way down underneath

Their faces were so close, Ralph could feel Jack’s breath fanning against him; warm and smooth. Ralph shivered as Jack pressed his forehead lightly against his, sending his pulse fluttering wildly as he did, eyes wide and locked on to Jack.

You make me roll my eyes, even make me grit my teeth

Time had stopped as the two continued dancing til the very end of the song. As it ended, Jack pulled away, seemingly realizing the position they were both in. He moved back and suddenly plopped down back first onto the bed, a wide grin noticeable on his face. Without thinking, Ralph joined him, exhausted from their movements.

It was that moment when everything seemed, calm. Like the world had paused and it was only a matter of time before it started up again.

So with the time he had, Ralph stared up at the ceiling, and let himself relax, in Jack’s bedroom, in Jack’s house. Ralph didn’t think much of it when he scooted closer to Jack, just a tiny bit, unsure of what he was trying to do, but satisfied with what he had done.

And the next time he looked Jack’s way, he seemed a little closer than before.

Maybe it could stay that way.

Chapter Text

Jack rose silently from the bed, spreading his hands out behind him as he sat up. Ralph followed the motion, rising to the same level as Jack. They were slowly coming back to their senses and the implications of what they had just done in the privacy of Jack’s own bedroom, and neither of them liked it.

As Ralph looked over, he could see Jack no longer had a smile on his face and had instead been replaced with a sulking frown.

It seemed reality had hit.

The redhead hopes of the bed, moving over to a few articles of clothes he had lying around, “I should start packing now.”

Ralph remained silent and only gave a nod of recognition as Jack looked at him. Ralph sprung from the bed as well, “We still need to finish your math homework.”

Jack looked at the clock in his room, then back at his clothes. “You can come over later and we’ll finish then. We won’t have time today.”

The way Jack said that made it seem as if he wasn’t asking but rather telling Ralph what he was going to do, and as Jack began to round his clothes together the fair boy knew that was exactly what had happened.

With hesitation, Ralph walked up next to Jack as he worked, trying to remind himself this would all be over soon enough. “Need any help?”

“No,” He answered swiftly, folding his clothing one by one.

Ralph took a deep breath and sat back on the bed. “Okay.”

Ralph took a deep breath and nodded, “Right,”
They were quiet again for a while and Ralph felt his stomach sinking as he sat back on the redhead's plush bed.

He was still trying to find something to say. Something, anything to break the silence and get this strange and unsettling tension between them, to ease the air.

“You’re spending the night at your Uncle’s house?” Ralph asked timidly, looking anywhere but towards Jack, his cheeks flushed. There was a beat before Jack replied. “I’m not sure how long I’m going to be there for yet.”

“Oh?”

Again with that beat of silence. “It’s complicated.”

There was a sudden change in the mood, the air became heavier. Ralph looked at Jack who avoided his gaze, avoiding eye contact and fidgeting around, obviously uncomfortable.

“So… where are your parents right now?” Jack picked up the pace of his packing and stated, “Not here.”

Ralph let his mouth shut tightly as he watched Jack fidgeted around uncomfortably. He had only meant to be nice, and make small talk as best he could. He didn’t mean to… upset Jack.

They stayed staring for a moment, neither of them daring to move. Then, just as fast as Jack had become angry, that anger faded into something else. Something he couldn’t quite put his finger on.

Jack sighed heavily, finishing up his first bag and closing it shut. He stared blankly at it for a moment, before turning around

“My uh… um, parents were… taken into custody not very long ago, if you must know.”

Ralph’s jaw dropped. Taken into custody? For what purpose? Murder? Robbery? All those questions flashed through his mind at lightning speed, but all he could bring himself to ask was, “As in… arrested?”

“Yeah.”

That was unexpected. Ralph frowned as he processed this information, “Do you have any idea why?”

Jack didn’t speak and instead, looked back over at Ralph. His blue eyes met his own, filled with confusion, worry, guilt, fear, and something else Ralph couldn’t describe; but something.

Finally, Jack spoke up. “Money laundering or something, I don’t know.” His voice was strained, and as he glanced downwards at the ground and clenched and unclenched his fingers nervously he added: “Someone accused them I guess.”

Ralph was horrified. He knew what he wanted to ask, but wasn’t too sure if he should ask it.

Jack quickly finished packing his things and flopped back onto his bed as soon as he was done. Ralph joined him and lay on his back beside him, staring at the ceiling, “Are you alright?”
Ralph turned his head towards him, an expression of annoyance on Jack’s face, “What kind of question is that?”

“Just wondering.”

Jack didn’t look Ralph’s way, but rather kept staring off at the wall, “Yeah, I’m fine.”

Ralph furrowed his eyebrows in concern. “Alright..”

They lay together in silence, staring at the ceiling, both refusing to acknowledge the awkwardness that hung in the air around them, the weight of whatever they might say weighing heavy on their tongues. Eventually, Jack finally broke the silence, breaking the tense atmosphere with only two mere words, “I’m sorry.”

Ralph’s brows lowered and he turned his head toward Jack, “What?”

Jack rolled over and looked at Ralph, “For everything…”

Ralph stared at him intensely, just as intensely as Jack was looking at him. He searched his face, dumbfounded, “For… you mean-“

“Yeah,” Jack breathed out, looking away as the words escaped his lips.

This wasn’t how Ralph thought this session was gonna go.

Ralph sat up and swallowed thickly, and with a shaky arm put his hand on Jack’s shoulder. It took a few moments for Jack to sit up and meet his eyes and when he did, he looked like he’d rather be anywhere else. Ralph took a deep breath.

“Um, thank you.”

Silence hung between them once again, but somehow this time, the silence wasn't so suffocating, or so awkward. Instead, it held something else, something else Ralph was equally as uncomfortable with.

Jack probably felt the same, as he quickly hopped off the bed and grabbed his bags. “My Uncle will be here soon, let’s wait outside for him, yeah?”

The boys walked out the front doors of Jack’s mansion and down the driveway of his uncle’s home. Jack took the lead, with Ralph following after him. He had offered to help with the bags but Jack insisted he was fine.

They waited on the driveway for no more than a minute before that same red Alvis came driving down the road, and it was then Ralph realized he didn’t have a ride home yet.

The car pulled up and stopped right beside the boys, but before either could move, the window rolled down a voice spoke.

A girl, who looked to be an older teenager, with light ginger locks and dark brown eyes, sat in the front next to Ivor, leaning forward out the window. “Get in, Jack.” She glanced over to Ralph, adding “You too.”

“Hope in, boys!” Ivor affirmed, with a bright smile on his face.

Ralph hesitated, eyeing the car, in silence as Jack opened the back door.

“Come on, we don’t bite!” Ralph was supposed to see another girl, no older than Ralph, said from the back seat at Ralph, noticing his nervous demeanor. She had pale skin with dark brown hair, with matching dark eyes like the older lass in front of her. She almost reminded Ralph of Maurice. A big, stupid grin on her face, oblivious to the world around her.

Now that’s just plain mean, Ralph thought, scolding himself for his own unfair remarks towards a girl whom he did not even know.

“Oh, I don’t know about that,” Jack said with a straight face, not attempting to be humorous in any way, but the girl still laughed in return.

Jack and Ralph scooted into the backseat, all 3 passengers squished against each other uncomfortably. This certainly was not going to be an easy ride home, Ralph figured that much.

“You boys have fun?” Ivor asked, driving out of the driveway and starting down the street.

Ralph nodded awkwardly, keeping his gaze fixed firmly on the road ahead of them.

“Yes, but I’ll still need to finish up the homework later,” Jack informed him and Ralph turned his head back.
Ivor glanced at him, laughing, “Is that so? Looks like you had too much fun fooling around instead of working .”

“No. I’ll finish it, don’t worry.” Jack reassured, rolling his shoulders and yawning.

“I’m holding you to it, kid,” Ivor assured him before turning his attention back to the road.

Ralph told Ivor where he lived and they decided they’d drop him off first, making sure he got home on time to his mother. Ralph does worry that she will be mad at him for not making her aware of his whereabouts, but there was nothing he could do about it now. All he could do was simply hope she wouldn't get too cross with him for it.

During the ride home, the girl next to him kept rambling on to him about random TV shows and movies, while Jack seemed to get increasingly annoyed with her. However he did not say anything, only rested his head on the window and stared out at the passing scenery. Ralph took a moment to take in his features; the freckles on his face that went down his arms and back, his ginger hair that was cut short most likely in an attempt to tame it, and his blue eyes, though somewhat clouded with tiredness, were captivating nonetheless. Ralph smiled softly as he watched Jack stare ahead, the world passing him by as they drove.

He just looked… calm. So different from how Ralph had seen him just months ago, with dark circles under his eyes and blood painted all over his back and face. Ralph shivered at the memory.

Eventually, Ivor stopped in front of Ralph’s home, and the boy couldn’t help but feel a little embarrassed, seeing as his house was so much smaller than Jack’s. But that’s neither here nor there, so Ralph swiftly opened the door and stepped out, carrying his satchel in one arm and his blazer in another.

“Thank you for driving me,” Ralph thanked Ivor, and he nodded his head in acknowledgment.

“Don’t mention it,” The man replied with a chuckle. “Take care, lad”

The two girls gave a wave goodbye, but Jack simply put his head down and mumbled a quiet farewell. After that, and as the car pulled off the driveway, Ralph stood there alone on the porch and watched until the taillights disappeared from view.

Ralph turned and walked to the front door, and to his surprise, the door was unlocked. Not really knowing what to think about this, he continued in as he normally does, taking his shoes off and heading towards his room. So far, Ralph has not caught sight of his mother, but he knows she must be here as their car is in the driveway. Ralph set his bag down on his bed and blazer over the chair next to it.

Amidst changing, he heard a snore coming from his mother's room. The blond boy cautiously made his way to the door and gently opened it, peaking inside.

There his mother lay, fast asleep. Her waitress attire was still on as well as the shoes she had worn that morning. Has she been asleep this whole time? Ralph thought.

Ralph closed the door and tip-toed back to his room.

His mother was tired, he ought to let her sleep.

Chapter Text

Ralph went along his evening as he normally would if his mother were awake. Get dressed, fix himself dinner, brush his teeth, get into bed and read before calling it a night. The next morning as he was eating breakfast, he got bombarded with his mother's frantic apologies for her dishevelment the previous day, which, to Ralph, was quite unnecessary.

"It's alright, mummy. You were tired," Ralph assured, fidgeting with the food on his plate, "I'm thirteen now, anyways. If I want to get anywhere I outta start taking care of myself."

Bridgette let herself smile at that, "You are such a mature young man, Ralph. I really did win with a child like you."

Ralph chuckled softly, feeling proud of himself after his mother's compliment. They finished their meal, and quickly set off to drop Ralph off per usual.

"I won't dose off again, I promise you!" Bridgette insisted from the car, the engine still on. "I'll be right here, on the dot, second you get out!"

Ralph turned his head and smiled reassuringly. "I know you will, Mummy," Ralph chuckled, "Have a nice time at work."

"And to you too, love," His mother responded with a gentle smile before she backed out of school parking lot and to her next destination.

Ralph headed to his English classroom where he expected to find both Kane and Gordon chatting away excitedly. And chatting away they were, although this time not in the loud and boisterous manner they usually would. Instead, it was far quieter, and they were hunched over with this hands cupped around their mouths as if they didn't want anyone to hear what they were saying.

Are they talking about me?  Ralph thought to himself in slight shock. No, what had he done to deserve that? It wasn't helped by the fact that when they saw Ralph, they giggled and shoved each other like they were hiding something.

"What's so funny?" Ralph asked as he sat down at his desk, hanging his satchel up behind him.

Gordon's face lit up upon hearing Ralph call for them. "Nothing," Gordon replied with a shrug and a smile plastered onto his lips.

Kane however, was anything but smiling. In fact, his face remained impassive even though Ralph had caught sight of his eyes darting from Gordon to the fair boy. He was clearly trying not to laugh. But Kane was never one to be able to keep up a facade, so all it took was one mutual glance between himself and Gordon to make the boy burst out laughing. Gordon tried covering up his smile with the back of his hand, but failed miserably.

"What's wrong with you two?" Ralph demanded, his face scrunched up, irritated by his friends sudden secrecy.

Kane cleared his throat in response, giving an amused look at Gordon, "We just...well...." Kane stammered in an overly chirpy voice, unable to suppress his laughter and finally broke into uncontrollable giggles. "I don't think you'd want to know." "And why is that?" He gave a bewildered look at them both.

"Eh..." Gordon shrugged again, this time in a more serious manner, "You're far too prudish."

Ralph furrowed his brows at this remark, shaking his head, "I am not!"

"You are too! You don't even like girls, you wouldn't have any interest in what we're talking about." Ralph felt a sharp pain in his chest as he heard those words, and suddenly Ralph felt all eyes on him. It was as if the whole classroom was spinning and everyone had turned to stare at him, to judge him, to see right through him. However it only lasted a second before the dizziness subsided and the world seemed to turn back to normal again.

Ralph quickly composed himself to reply to his friend's ignorant statements. "Shut up, Kane," Ralph growled, clenching his jaw. "I do like girls! And I am not prudish, I'm quite open minded."

Kane chuckled. "Don't get yourself in a tizz, mate. It's not that important anyway."

But it was obviously important enough, because as soon as Ralph sighed and leaned back against his chair, showing he was no longer listening, the two went back to giggling and snickering to themselves.

This is foolish... Ralph thought to himself, frustrated. Why can't they just tell me? I'm no saint, I've heard far worse things...

Probably done worse things too.

Ralph shivered, not wanting to bring on more anxiety again.

Instead, he decided to slightly eavesdrop the best he could without looking suspicious. Their conversation was barley audible, only being able to make out a few words at a time.

"...because I was looking at the magazine... yeah yeah, page 5... it was so embarrassing but I couldn't... and she almost walked in too!" Gordon chuckled at the last part causing Kane to break out into hysterics. "Seriously mate?" "Mhm!"

Ralph was left the classroom with many mixed feelings, and that day with many questions. None of which he was gonna get answers to, that he knew for sure.

When Ralph awoke the next morning, he immediately realized something wasn't right. His pajama shorts felt tight and uncomfortable on his skin, as well as a weird sensation in his stomach. He slowly opened his eyes, sitting up and rubbing his face, wondering what could be the problem now. As he sat up, he looked towards his bottom half, questioning what was making him feel this way.

And low and behold, Ralph had another erection.

At this point, his mother had told him what that was. She said sometimes men's bodies would do that, and it was perfectly normal. "Daddy too?" Ralph had asked genuinely, resulting in his mother chuckling nervously at the question. "Yes, Daddy too. Please, don't worry about it, dear." That's all she said, but it was enough to momentarily calm his nerves about it and what it might mean. But now that it was back again, he still wasn't quite sure how to get rid of it. His mother hadn't told him anything about that.

What he had done last time was just sit it out and wait for it to go away, which seemed to be the solution to the problem, even if it took a bit.

I suppose I'll have to just wait again... Ralph thought to himself unhappily, yawning and fidgeting in bed as he turned over to get in a more comfortable position.

But as he moved, a pillow he hadn't even registered was there brushed up against his erection, causing Ralph to jolt awake at the feeling, his eyes fully opened.

It was an oddly... nice feeling. Almost pleasant. But at the same time, a strange discomfort crept up Ralph's spine and spread across his body. Like this was the start of something bad. So he sat in bed for a moment, planning to just ignore it and go back to bed. But the feeling lingered in his mind and before he knew it his thoughts were consumed by the idea of doing it again.

Eventually, his curiosity got the better of him. He tried it again, rubbing himself up against the pillow. Now intentional, the feeling was more intense, and Ralph became more conscious of a new sensation, the warmth spreading lower down his belly, and the strange ache in his loins.

A mixture of excitement, embarrassment, and confusion filled his mind, leaving him unsure as to how to proceed...

The feeling managed to win again however, as soon Ralph had thrust up against it once more, this time his breath hitching as he did so.

He did it again, and again, until he wasn't thinking about his discomfort anymore, only caring about this new sensation he was experiencing.

It was delightful, and he wasn't sure why. But any questions disappeared as he suddenly found himself on top of the pillow, holding it in place underneath him as he continued to thrust and rub against it. As the realization of what he was doing finally dawned on him, the dots began connecting. Was this what Gordon and Kane were talking about? Was this what he was "too innocent" for? Did Gordon really think...

Gordon.

Huh.

He has very pretty eyes...

The pit in his stomach grew hotter.

He pushed his hips harder, the softness of the pillow pushing against him nicely.

His hair is such a pretty color...

Ralph's breathing intensified. He wasn't exactly sure why, but the feeling was getting more intense.

And his freckles... his...

"Mmm."

Suddenly his head fell forward as the tension built in the pit of his stomach. His mind began wandering, and as he kept going the more out of touch with reality he became.

His mind was still on Gordon's freckled face, almost too faint to even see, but if you got up close enough, you could see them lightly scattered all around.

As nice as it was, thinking of his friends freckles lead his mind to a place even worse than it already was.

Ralph opened his eyes and looked down below him. He no longer saw a pillow, an object, beneath him.

Instead, he saw a boy, red hair disheveled and freckled stained cheeks red with exasperation from Ralph rutting against him. He was staring upward with half lidded eyes and lips slightly parted, panting softly as his movements increased, becoming more frantic.

Ralph imagined running his hands through his curly locks, relishing in the pleasure of watching him. His eyes fluttered shut, breathing becoming shallow and short. He pictured pressing their foreheads together, and leaning in until their noses touched, their breathe mingling, as the redhead put his hands on the fair boy's waist, desperately trying to pull him closer than he already was.

Like he couldn't get enough of him...

Like he cared about him...

The heat in Ralph's groin reached it's peak and with it, the blond felt himself begin to feel like he was coming apart from the inside out. He involuntarily made a noise he had never made before in his life. It felt like he had lost control of his body for a second, and that probably should've scared Ralph half to death. Rather, Ralph felt quite euphoric.

But that euphoria only lasted a few seconds before it slowly dwindled away to nothing, leaving him back in reality once more.

Ralph felt a wetness in shorts, and when he checked he realized it had come from his-

What the bloody hell, he thought to himself.

As Ralph cleaned up the unfamiliar mess he had just made, he was left alone to think about what had just happened. But not one second into it and Ralph shut down his mind. Nothing had happened that was out of the ordinary. His mother said it was normal, so it must be. He's not sure why he began thinking of his friend or... him, but why should Ralph worry about that?. His mother told him not to, so he won't.

There was no reason to dwell on it any further.

His mother would come to wake him up soon after. She peeked through the slight crease from the open door, "Honey? Are you awake?" She stepped in cautiously, mindful not to alarm him.

Ralph, who was now sitting on his bed reading, turned to her and nodded. She grinned, "I thought I heard you get up."

By this time, Ralph had forgotten all about his morning endeavor.

It was probably better that way.

Chapter Text

It took a bit of respectful but persistent back and forth with Miss Brown for Ralph to find himself at the front doorstep of the house Jack was currently residing in, his mother waving him goodbye and pulling out of their driveway before Ralph could run back insisting he had changed his mind.

With his mother gone and him finally able to be alone with his thoughts, he began pacing the front porch anxiously. Ralph managed a one time visit with Jack, but he was in over his head if he thought he could do another. The young lad sighed deeply as he rubbed his neck, unease sinking in with the realization he had no other choice.

The wooden boards of the porch creaked beneath him as Ralph looked up to observe the house. It was Jack's Aunt and Uncle's house, far less extravagant than Jack's, yet still managing to be bigger than his. It was located on the curve of the road, an empty patch of lawn in front.

Ralph took a few steps to the door, before knocking on it a few times gently. After a couple of moments of muffled commotion, the door swung open revealing a tall brunet woman in a dark blue dress, Jack's aunt, Donna. A smile spread across her face when she spotted Ralph, who stood looking up at her timidly.

"Are you Ralph?" The woman asked warmly.

Ralph nodded, "Yes, ma'am."

She chuckled, reaching her hand out, gesturing for Ralph to step inside, "Please, come in!"

Without another word, Ralph stepped in, taking off his shoes and followed her into the entryway. The air inside was cool and carried the faint scent of lavender. As the woman led him through the house, she called out, "Jack, your friend is here!"

Friend.

What a funny word to use.

They had been friends once, hadn't they?

Ralph heard footsteps come down from a stairway not far from the entrance.

As the redhead made his way downstairs, he heard a voice from the top, "Hey, we weren't done!"

Ralph looked up to see the girl the other day, Jack's cousin who sat next to him on the way back to his house. Jack scoffed in response, "I have a guest over, I don't have time."

The girl folded her arms, "You and Mabel never have time to play with me." But as disappointed as she sounded, the girl ran off without another word, leaving Jack to roll his eyes and face Ralph.

"Come on, let's go to my room." Jack was wasting no time. He was eager to get this over with, evident in the way he tugged at Ralph's hand. Ralph instinctively attempted to pull away, but Jack's grip was unyielding.

Instead, Jack rushed Ralph up the stairs and down the long hall it took to get to the room he finally stopped at. Just like everything else about the house, it was far less sophisticated than Jack's other room back at his mansion. In fact, everything about it appeared rather plain. As if someone had just moved in.

"I've got everything set up, let's go." Jack's words were rushed. He made his way to the bed, plopping down with a sigh, gesturing for Ralph to join him.

What was Jack in such a rush for?

Oh, right.

Of course.

Ralph couldn't shake the feeling of unease that settled in the pit of his stomach.

Reluctantly, Ralph took a seat beside Jack, his gaze fixed on the floor. Jack handed him the homework, a silent command to begin. And so, they commenced their task, the only sound in the room the scratching of pencils against paper and occasionally their timid voices.

Jack's hurried demeanor seemed to infect their work, and within thirty minutes, they had completed what had previously taken hours. This should've been a good thing, as it meant Jack was getting the hang of it.

Only thing was, Ralph had told his mother to pick him up in 2 hours. With their task finished so soon, he couldn't help but wonder what they were going to do now.

It was then the two boys heard a rhythmic knock at the door.

"Oh fuck off!" Jack yelled suddenly, causing Ralph to jump. He was not used to this type of swearing.

"Mum said swearing is bad, I'll tell her!" The girls' high pitched voice echoed through the door.

"Go bother Mabel," Jack retorted angrily, now fully looking at the door. Despite the girl's persistence, she still had not opened it.

"Mabel's gone already, she's at Eleanor's house." The reply came again.

Jack grunted with a scowl on his face, "W-well, I-"

Finally, the door burst open and an angry looking girl stood behind it, arms crossed and brows furrowed in disapproval, "Jack! You promised me!" She shouted. Jack rolled his eyes, standing up from his spot on the bed.

"Yeah, yeah," He huffed, walking towards the door where the girl stood still fuming. He grabbed the sleeves of his shirt and rolled them up, looking back over to Ralph from the doorway, "Do you... wanna... play with Matilda?" he muttered.

The girl gave Ralph a passing glance, flashing a smile his way, as if to say 'say yes!'

Why not. He had nothing better to do with his time, and at least if Jack wanted to try anything there'd be a witness to report his death.

Did he still believe that was going to happen?

"Sure." Ralph agreed, standing up from his place.

Matilda seemed pleased by this answer, smiling wider, "Alright then, follow me!" She motioned for Ralph and Jack to walk after her, which they did so reluctantly,

Matilda led the way downstairs and out to the front yard. She skipped ahead, her dark hair bouncing with each step. She quickly found a suitable patch of concrete on the driveway and turned to the boys with a bright smile.

"Let's play hopscotch!" she declared. Before the boys could reply, she headed over to a little chest Ralph didn't realize was there, opened it up, and retrieved two pieces of broken chalk.

The girl made her way back to her chosen spot of the driveway and dropped to her knees to draw the squares.

Ralph glanced at Jack, who stood with his arms folded, watching his cousin with impatience.

"Come on, Jack, help me draw the squares," Matilda urged, extending the second piece of chalk expectantly at him.

He glanced at her for a moment longer before relenting with a sigh and crouching beside her, taking the chalk from her hand and helping out with the grid. Ralph, feeling somewhat out of place, knelt beside them and watched silently.

After a few minutes, Jack pulled back, wiping some sweat from his forehead. The grid was finished. He tossed the chalk aside and stood up, turning to Matilda, "So?"

Matilda clapped her hands, pleased with their work. "Okay, who wants to go first?" she asked, looking between the two boys.

Ralph hesitated, biting his lip, before shrugging. "I'll go," he volunteered, wanting to keep things moving and avoid any awkward silences.

"Perfect!" Matilda answered, grabbing a pebble from the ground and handing it to Ralph. He hadn't played hopscotch in years, but the rules were simple enough. He took a deep breath and tossed the stone, aiming for the first square. It landed perfectly, and he hopped through the grid, careful to skip the square with the stone.

Next, it was Jack's turn. He threw the stone, watching as it landed on the third square. The boy hopped through the squares, skipping the third and finishing just as quickly as he had started.

He threw the stone at Matilda who fumbled with it before grabbing hold of it and tossing it on the fourth. She gleefully skipped through the squares, before coming to a stop in front of Ralph.

The three took turns throwing and skipping, with some light back and fourth as they did so, but not enough to keep any of them entertained. Eventually, Matilda had to take mercy on the boys. As she finished her round, she dusted off her baby blue dress, glancing back at the two, "That's enough of that. Let's play something else." She put her had to her chin, thinking carefully about what they could play next, until she got her idea, "How about tag?"

Ralph exchanged a glance with Jack, who shrugged. "Sure."

Suddenly, Ralph felt a light tap on the shoulder and saw Matilda sprinting away, "Tag, you're it!"

Jack's eyes widened as he and Ralph's eyes locked, and hurriedly ran in the other direction.

Ralph stood for a moment, watching Matilda's and Jack's fleeting figures. A smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. He took a deep breath and began to chase after Matilda, her laughter echoing through the yard.

Anytime Matilda saw Ralph chasing her, she'd scream and immediately book it the opposite way. Jack, while less enthusiastic, still played along and avoided Ralph like Matilda.

Eventually, after a few minutes of back and forth around the house, Ralph caught up and tapped Matilda's elbow, almost forgetting to shout, "Tag, you're it!" as he did so.

"Ah!" Matilda yelled, a big smile on her face as she came to a halt only to wind up again in Ralph's direction. She was small, but she was quite the fast runner.

As Ralph made his way to the backyard, he heard a faint, "Tag!" from the front yard, followed by Matilda footsteps charging towards Ralph, Jack behind her.

Jack, seeing an opportunity, ran toward Ralph, hoping to tag him while he was standing there. Ralph noticed Jack's approach just in time and dashed back around the house.

Ralph looked behind him, seeing the sight of Jack running towards him, hand reaching out and a smile on his face. Ralph's smile deteriorated, as an image flashed before his eyes: Jack, hair in a ponytail and paint all over his face, chasing him like a wild animal hunts it's prey.

Before he knew it, he was gasping and sprinting across the yard, to the other side of the street and back, hoping to loose Jack in the process. But of course, the redhead was determined not to let him win. He raced after him with such ferocity that Ralph couldn't help but think the worst.

No, no, no, no, not again, Ralph thought, speeding up as he tried to catch his breath, but it was no use with how fast he was running.

Ralph reached the backyard again, and headed for an oak tree he spotted. His hands reached out for it, but just as it did, he felt a hand around his waist, pulling him in and away from the tree.

He let out a yelp, falling back into Jack's arms as he tried to free himself from his grip. Tears he didn't even realize were there ran down his cheeks, as he squirmed and wiggled under Jack's grip.

Jack laughed, tugging at his body and pressing their foreheads together, a smirk plastered on his face as he stared back at the boy beneath him, "Gotcha," he whispered, squeezing Ralph's middle.

And with that, Ralph fell apart. All his resolve, all his strength evaporated instantly as Jack said that, the tears pouring out.

Jack's smirk fell, as he felt Ralph struggling within his grasp. Jack immediately loosened his grip, his eyes widening in surprise. "Ralph? Hey, it's okay. I-I was just playing," he said softly, his voice trembling along with Ralph's.

Ralph removed himself from Jack, sitting next to him, focused on controlling the tears streaming down his face. Jack tried putting a hand on Ralph's shoulder, but the touch made him flinch and involuntarily gasp, "Get away from me!"

Jack looked a little shocked before scooting back and away from Ralph, making sure there was a distance between them. 

"Where are you guys?" A voice shouted. Matilda came around the house and spotted them. Her face fell upon seeing Ralph, and she came running as she heard his cries. She stopped short, her eyes wide with confusion. "Ralph? Are you okay?" she asked.

It took a few minutes of patting his back to make Ralph calm down, wipping away his tears and sniffing, "Y-yeah," He managed to say, "Just fell down."

"Aw, I'm sorry," Matilda said, holding out her hand for Ralph to take it, "We can stop playing if you want. It was getting a little boring anyways."

Jack, still reeling from the sudden shift in mood, took a deep breath, trying to calm himself before speaking. "Yeah, we can do something else if you want, Ralph. Whatever you feel like."

Ralph shook his head, "No, no it's okay. We can do what Matilda wants." He took her hand, pulling himself up alongside Jack. Matilda smiled warmly, nodding. "If you insist. I have an idea."

"No bloody way, Matilda."

Matilda pouted, folding her arms with the dolls still in her hands, "Why not? Ralph said we can do what I want!"

"I'm not playing dolls with you, you twit," Jack snapped, shooting Ralph a glare, "And he doesn't either, I'm sure."

Ralph grimaced, feeling caught in between their disagreement. The fair boy looked over at Matilda, who gave him a disappointed look.

"I... don't mind playing dolls," he stuttered.

Matilda let a smile spread across her face, "Really?"

Ralph forced a grin, "Yeah, really."

Jack groaned loudly and leaned back against the wall. Matilda tapped her foot, a smug expression appearing on her face. Jack sighed. "Fine."

Matilda cheered, quickly heading to retrieve her pile of dolls from her toybox. Once she got them all lined up, she assigned two to each of them. Jack got Rosemary and Patricia, Ralph got Susan and Sally-Mae, and Matilda gave herself her two favorites, Carol and Ruby-Jane.

Ralph looked at his hands, putting Susan in his left and Sally-Mae in his right. He couldn't believe he was really about to play with dolls.

"Please, Susan! Come to the bakery with me! I need to talk to you about Patricia," Matilda's voice went to a low whisper, as if she was keeping a secret.

"Why, whatever must you tell me?" Ralph asked in the most feminine voice he could muster, making Susan lean in closer to Ruby-Jane.

Matilda giggled, "I heard Patricia has been talking to Rosemary behind our backs!"

Ralph gasped dramatically, his eyes widening in fake surprise. "No! Not Patricia! How could she betray us like that?"

Suddenly, Jack came in, Patricia in hand, "What did you say about me you nitwit?" He made Patricia come barging in, hands in the air. Matilda shoved Ruby-Jane down, "Jack! Patricia doesn't come in now!"

Jack burst out laughing at the sight of Matilda's indignation, unable to contain his amusement. Ralph too couldn't help but let out a couple giggles. "Alright, alright, Patricia stays out, for now."

After a few more minutes of back and forth with the dolls, Ralph couldn't help but get rather thirsty. He quietly excused himself, letting Jack and Matilda keep playing while he went to go get some water.

Ralph made his way down the stairs and to the kitchen, but before he got there, he heard faint sniffing and sobbing. Curiosity piqued, Ralph followed the sound until he reached the kitchen. There, he saw Jack's aunt sitting at the kitchen table, her shoulders shaking as she wiped away tears. Ralph quietly approached, "Mrs. Merridew?"

The woman turned around as soon as she heard the boy's voice, the expression on her face making it clear that she did not hear the blond boy coming. The woman sat up straight, "Yes, dear?"

Ralph frowned, worry etching lines on his forehead. "Are you okay? Is everything alright?"

Donna laughed and nodded, wipping away a tear from her eye, "Of course, sweetie. I'm alright. I just-" She trailed off, looking away as if searching for the right words. Ralph waited patiently for a response. Finally, Donna sighed, her shoulders slumping in resignation. "It's just very nice to see Jack with a friend."

"Ralph, your mother's here!" A voice called from downstairs, the three just finished calling out Patricia for lying to their faces.

"We can continue another day?" Matilda asked Ralph, searching for an acception to her invitation. Ralph smiled, "Uh... sure."

Ralph grabbed his bag and headed downstairs, Jack and Matilda following close behind. Donna escorted Ralph outside and to his mother's car.

"Ralph?" Donna said softly as they reached the car.

Ralph turned to face her, "Yes?"

She smiled, "Jack has a choir performance coming up, on the 17th from 7 to 9 at the church," The woman informed. She put her hand on Ralph's shoulder, "You should come. I'm sure that would make him very happy."

Ralph's brow knitted together, thinking it over carefully. Did he really want to do that? Nevertheless, he gave a nod and smiled, "I'll see if I can."

Ralph opened the car door, his mother greeting him with a grin. Matilda was outside, waving as the car pulled out.

And there was Jack, right alongside her, waving too.

Chapter Text

"You're being reckless, Jack!" Ralph shouted, his voice hoarse, "We need to focus on keeping the signal fire going. It's our only hope of being rescued!"

Jack's face twisted with anger, his painted visage making him look more like a wild animal than a boy. "We need meat. We can't live off rotten fruit. The beast is out there, Ralph, and we can't just sit around and wait for rescue that might never come!"

The other boys, caught in the middle of the argument, watched with wide eyes, their loyalties all divided. Some clutched spears, their faces smeared with paint, while others stood behind Ralph.

Ralph took a step closer to Jack, his fists clenched at his sides. "If we get rescued, we won't need that meat. I'm the chief, I-"

"You're not fit to be chief. You're weak!" 

The accusation cut deep, and for a moment, Ralph was at a loss for words. Eventually, he had the courage to shout back, "You're wrong!"

Jack scoffed, "Well I'm leaving, you can stay here with your precious fire. But I'm taking my hunters with me."

Jack turned around and left, signaling for the painted boys to follow his lead. The hunters didn't waste time in joining, trudging behind their leader.

Ralph watched, feeling tears come up. He quickly wiped them away as he felt Piggy's hand on his shoulder, reassuring Ralph that he still had them. 

"You're doing the right thing, Ralph. We don't need them, we don't need Jack!"

Ralph nodded, but as they left, he couldn't help but turn back, watching as Jack disappeared with the rest of the boys. Ralph could only hope this would not be the last he saw of them, of Jack. They'd be back eventually, right?

December was upon the Everly family and the rest of England. Snow began falling and the air got extra chilly. Ralph smiled. Winter brought Christmas, and Christmas brought his daddy home. 

"Mummy?" Ralph asked, shoving a spoonful of corn flakes in his mouth. 

His mother stood at the kitchen counter, boiling a pot of tea. 'Yes, love?"

"Is Daddy coming home soon?" Ralph had little reason to think otherwise, his daddy always came home for Christmas. But as he saw his mother's smile drop, he realized what the answer would be.

"I don't think so, sweetie, no," Bridgette said, setting the tea kettle down on the stovetop. "It'll just be the two of us this year."

Ralph frowned, stopping mid chew, "What? Why?"

"He's still overseas, honey. It'll be a while before he gets time off again," She explained, letting her back lean against the kitchen sink.

Ralph set his spoon down, staring at his bowl with a somber look on his face, "Oh." His mother crouched down beside him, wrapping her arm around his shoulders. Ralph hugged his mommy tight, burying his face into her side.

"It's okay, honey. Daddy will come back, he always does," She reassured. A hand reached over and caressed Ralph's cheek, as he sniffled in return. "It's just one Christmas," He heard his mother's voice say, "He'll be okay, I promise."

"Drink it," Alan demanded, forcing the bottle back into Paul's hands. 

"I don't want to though, I hate milk," Paul squealed like a girl, making a dramatic face of disgust. 

Frank scoffed, "He looks like a milk," He muttered, shoving Ralph as he snickered.

"What does that even mean?" The blond whispered back. 

Frank rolled his eyes, "Oh forget it."

As the boys finished, they stood up and grabbed their satchels. When they did, Alan abruptly grabbed Frank's arm. "Hey!"
Frank flinched when Alan's grip tightened. "None of you are leaving until Paul finishes."

"Why?" Gareth asked.

Alan narrowed his eyes. "Because it's the rules, no one leaves until everyone is done," Alan shifted his gaze back towards Paul, "Finish your dinner, Paul."

Gareth sneered, "Great job, Paul, you're keeping all of us behind."

Paul's face went red, a very noticeable shade on his unusually pale face. Ralph felt a twinge of guilt for the boy as he sipped on his milk and everyone sat back down.

Eventually Paul finished, and Alan allowed everyone to leave. Frank grabbed Ralph's satchel for him and the two headed off outside where Sydney, Kane, and Munish waited for them. It was a cold afternoon, damp and wet from rain that just stopped before lunch. 

As Frank dropped their bags on the ground, Sydney glanced at them with a furrowed brow. "What took you guys so long?"

"Head of our table kept us back, that's what," He said, plopping down next to Kane, "Some bloke at our table was taking forever to finish."

"Who was it?" Munish asked with interest, sliding closer to Frank.

"Paul King."

Kane groaned, "I can't stand that bloke. He's so annoying."

Sydney grinned, "I have him in my History class," The boy snickered, "He barley talks, but when he does he's always sucking up to Miss Morgan."

"And he looks like a ghost, doesn’t he?" Munish added, nodding in agreement with the others.

"Yeah, proper strange," Frank responded. "That white hair and those weird eyes. Gives me the willies."

"I heard he scared off a girl at St. Elizabeth's just by saying 'hi' to her!" Sydney exclaimed.

"Sounds about right, what girl would want to go out with that twit?"

The group burst into laughter, all except for Ralph, who shifted uncomfortably. Ralph glanced back toward the school, imagining Paul walking out alone, still red-faced from embarrassment.

It all reminded him too much of...

“Think we’ll find anything up this way?” Ralph asked, wiping sweat from his brow.

Jack shrugged. “Maybe."

The two walked in silence for a few minutes, some stolen glances in between. At last, Ralph spoke up, “How do you think Piggy’s doing back at the shelters?”

Jack scoffed, "Probably sitting on his arse complaining about his specks and how I'm not doing anything right."

Ralph frowned, biting his lip, “Come on, Jack, Piggy’s got good ideas. He’s just… different.”

Jack smirked, suddenly holding his nose and stepping in front of Ralph, "My auntie says I can't run on account of my asthma," Jack mocked.

Ralph giggled, covering his mouth with his hands to suppress any more laughter, "Jack-!"

Jack continued, “Ralph, Ralph, we need shelter Ralph!"

The blond boy burst out laughing, trying to stop himself but failing. Instead, he held onto Jack's shoulder as they both cackled, wrapping their arms around each other in united mockery.

"Hey, look who it is," Kane said, nudging the other boys and drawing their attention to someone approaching.

Ralph looked around and saw Jack pacing nearby, his hands shoved into his pockets. He looked uneasy, as if he was searching for someone.

"It's that mucker from Kane's class," Frank muttered, smirking.

"Mucker?" Ralph asked, shocked Frank would say such a word. 

Jack looked around at the groups of boys sitting and standing around, talking and laughing with one another. He paced around them, observing all the groups with weary eyes. 

"Do it, do it!" He heard the boys behind him whisper to Kane, giggling and slapping the ground. 

In mere seconds, Ralph heard Kane shout, "Oi, Jack!"

Jack stopped walking to turn to the boy that shouted at him. He raised an eyebrow, and took his hands out of his pockets.

"What's it like living in the potato fields, Mick?"

The boys behind Ralph all burst out laughing, either slapping each other on the shoulder or snickering at the tall boy. Ralph turned around, shock all over his face. Kane sat there, grinning that smug grin of his.

Jack flushed beet red. Folding his arms he called out, "Oh, real original, Kane. Come up with that one by yourself?"

Despite Jack's comeback, the laughter continued, and Frank spoke up this time, "What'chu doing over here, Paddy? Come to beg for scraps?"

Jack's eyes flashed with anger, but he tried to keep his voice steady. "I'd rather beg for scraps than be as brainless as you lot," he snapped. 

"Ouch, that hurt," Frank said, the sarcasm dripping off his tongue in an obnoxious manner. Ralph frowned. Who did Kane and Frank think they were? Calling Jack all these names? Jack had a response for all of it, but it didn't seem to matter. The boys kept on laughing and mocking him with no shame.

The taunts were relentless, and Ralph felt a knot tighten in his stomach. Ralph looked over at Jack, and saw the pain in his eyes. He looked at him like a kicked puppy, sad and hurt. But then that sadness turned to anger, as he glared daggers at Ralph. 

Sydney cackled, "What's the matter Jack? Didn't have your pint for breakfast?" 

"Careful," Munish added, smirking. "Don't let the sun burn that pale Irish skin of yours."

Jack's fists clenched, his nails digging into his palms. "You think you're so clever, don't you?" he yelled, his voice breaking slightly. "But you're nothing but cowards, all of you!"

The boys' laughter faltered for a moment, but then Kane sneered, "Better a coward than a dirty Mick."

Ralph's heart pounded in his chest. He knew he should say something, anything. But nothing came out. 

Jack scoffed and looked around. The boys nearby who had overheard were laughing along now, and even the ones who weren't had their eyes glued to him. Jack ran away, seemingly out of insults to throw back, which left the group of boys guffawing and jeering behind him. 

Ralph turned to face Kane, "What was that about?" He demanded.

Kane sighed and shrugged, as if he hadn't just bombarded a boy with ruthless insults and mockery, "He's an Irish bloke from my class." His eyes suddenly light up, and he grins wide, "Wait, did I not tell you?"

"Tell me what?" Ralph asks, wondering what could possibly explain away what just happened.

Frank chimed in, "He doesn't know about that guy?"

Kane sits up straight, clasping his hands together, "Ok, so you know Jack, he's in my Math class, and he..."

But Ralph didn't listen. He couldn't.

The words floated around him, a meaningless jumble as the guilt tightened its grip on his heart. His mind replayed Jack's pained expression, the way Jack looked at him, like he was pleading for help. For Ralph to say something. Kane's voice and Frank's laughter faded as he heard nothing but his own thoughts race. 

"They used to call me Piggy."

"Piggy! Piggy!"

Sydney shook his head, "My Mummy told me, the Irish are always looking for trouble."

"Trouble he is, I can't believe he would do that! Just like that, right into the bloke's hand!"

The boys continued gossiping, but Ralph wasn't listening. The memory of Jack silently begging him to say something made it's way front and center in his mind. The cold, hard glare he gave him when he realized Ralph wasn't going to help him.

It made his head spin. He replayed the scene over and over again, wondering why he didn't do anything. 

He had to do something.

"Alright boys, in your lines, c'mon move it!" Mr. Sallow's voice boomed through the gym. He stood with his hands on his hips, a stern expression on his face. Ralph and the rest of the boys scrambled to get in line, beginning their warm-up stretches.

As they did so, Ralph couldn't help but steal glances at Jack, who seemed to be focused on his own thoughts. Ralph felt that same pit in his stomach as he looked at Jack. He seemed even more distraught and disinterested then usual. 

Then an idea came to mind.

As the boys kept on with their stretches, Ralph tapped Jack on the shoulder. He turned around, and seemed to be a bit disappointed to see the blond behind him. Still, Ralph continued,  "Y-you're aunt told me you're having a choir concert soon, right?"

Jack nodded, "Yeah."

"Well," Ralph said, "Can I come?"

"Uh..." Jack pushed his hair out of his face, "I guess."

Mr. Sallow's sharp whistle interrupted their conversation. "Merridew, Everly, enough chit-chat! Let's get moving!"

The two fell back in their routine, but not before Jack whispered, "I can reserve seats for you, if you want."

Ralph gave a weak smile, "Ok."

Eventually, when the class ended, the boys headed towards the locker room. Ralph saw his chance as Jack walked slower than the rest of the group. He quickened his pace, catching up to him.

"Jack, wait," Ralph called out.

Jack turned around, giving him a questioning look.

"About today, I... I'm sorry."

There was silence for a moment. It felt weird, apologizing to Jack for something after all that's happened between them. Jack scratched the back of his neck, his eyes searching Ralph's face.

"Thanks," He finally said.

Chapter Text

"I told you, I'm alright."

Jack wheezed, hunching over as he tried to catch his breath. Ralph shook his head, trying to signal for Jack to lay back down. "You're sick, Jack." Ralph carefully took the cracked coconut from his lap and put it to Jack's lips. "Drink this."

Jack continued to cough, sneezing and wiping any snot away with his arm. "Come on, drink," Ralph insisted.

Reluctantly, Jack complied, at first taking only small sips. But as the cool liquid hit his throat, he began gulping it down, parched from a long day of hunting.

Jack finished the coconut water and leaned back, his breathing still labored but a bit calmer now.

Ralph smiled, "Now lay down and get some rest. The others will be fine, don't worry."

Jack shook his head, "I'm okay now, I-" but before he could finish his sentence, he let out a long wheeze, deep and throaty, making Ralph recoil. "Come on, lay down. You're in no shape to keep hunting." Ralph reached out, his hand landing on Jack's bare chest. For some reason, he let it rest there for a moment, before gently pushing the redhead down. Jack let out a groan as his head hit the ground.

As Jack spread out his arms, Ralph scooted over and rest his head besides Jack's. Jack looked over and scrunched up his face, "You can go, now."

Ralph blushed, shaking his head with a bit of embarrassment for what he was going to say next, "No, I'm going to stay with you."

Jack opened his mouth to say something, probably to start an argument about Ralph's presence in his weakest moments, but he only could get out a moan of discomfort before letting his head fall back against the ground.

Ralph scoot in close, but not enough to intrude his space. He smiled, feeling a sense of victory in Jack listening to him. It's been a while since that happened.

He wasn't sure how, but suddenly Ralph felt his finger brush against Jack's. For a moment, he felt the warmth of Jack's skin, the slight twitch of his fingers in response.

Jack slipped his hand away and turned on his side. Off to bed, Ralph presumed.

"Oh, this is going to be so much fun!" Bridgette hopped in the car, as Ralph did the same. He wasn't used to seeing his mother getting all dressed up anymore. She did her make-up, put on her best Sunday dress, jewelry, heels. This obviously meant a lot to her, making Ralph smile even if he had his own trepidations about going.

There were already a handful of cars parked in the Church parking lot. The Church itself was a beautiful thing, a tall steeple reaching towards the sky, a large cross adorned in the middle.

Bridgette stepped out first, her heels clicking on the pavement as she smoothened out her dress. Ralph followed, feeling a bit out of place in his slightly less formal attire. Unlike his mother, he wasn't wearing his Sunday best. He assumed nobody else would. But they were going to Church, what did he expect? It was a foolish mistake on his end.

The wooden doors were already propped open to invite in the guests, as two women stood on either sides of the doors, handing out pamphlets to all the people walking in. As Ralph and Bridgette stepped inside, they were greeted with the hustle and bustle of guests finding their seats, talking with their children, and up far ahead, the choirs.

Ralph stopped his mother, "My, uh... friend said he reserved us seats."

Bridgette grinned, nodding her head, "That sounds fantastic."

Jack caught sight of the two walking up the isle. He whispered something to his Choir teacher before walking towards Ralph and his mother.

Jack tried putting on a smile as he walked up to Bridgette, "Hello, miss."

"Hello," Bridgette grinned.

"I saved a spot for you," Jack gestured towards the seats behind him.

"Thank you, young man," Ralph's mother beamed.

Jack showed Ralph and his mother to their seats, up in the front row directly facing the choir. Bridgette thanked him and Jack hopped back up near the alter, rejoining the other kids.

The choir consisted of two groups; The boys group and the girls. Ralph never saw the girl group, on account of them being at the school across the way, but he did sometimes hear the boys singing when walking from Math to History.

The choir teacher, Mr. Bramley, stood in front of the boys, as he signaled for them to collide with the girls. In an instance, the girls and boys moved closer. A boy with dark black hair stood on Jack's right while a girl with brownish, peachy locks stood to Jack's left, her gaze resting on him.

The church began to fill with people, the air buzzing with anticipation for the performance. Ralph sat back in his seat, grabbing the pamphlet he got from the entrance. It had a list of the songs the choirs were going to preform. Some separately, some with each other. The starting song was "Winter Wonderland", with both the male and female choirs.

Ralph looked back up, expecting to see Jack staring out into the crowd, lost in thought as he waited for all the people to poor in and for the show to start. Instead, he noticed that Jack's attention was on the girl next to him, talking with her intently. 

Jack became more animated as the conversation went on, smiling at the girl who teasingly pushed his shoulder. Ralph felt a knot in his stomach. He looked down at the pamphlet in his hands again, scanning through the list of songs. "White Christmas", "Jingle Bells", and "Silent Night" were all on the list, but as much as Ralph didn't want to, he kept looking back up at the alter, to where he saw Jack bantering with the girl next to him.

When the black haired boy beside them joined in the conversation, it somehow relieved Ralph of some of the stress he was feeling. He felt himself let out a breath he didn't know he was holding in.

Mr. Bramley came over, shushing the kids as the girl's choir teacher headed towards the microphone. She held it in her hand as she signaled for the people in the pews to be quiet.

"Hello, everyone! Thank you so much for coming out tonight on this beautiful winter evening!"

Her voice carried through the church, calming the murmurs of the audience. She continued, "We have a wonderful program prepared for you tonight, featuring both our boys' and girls' choirs. We'll be starting off tonight with a classic favorite, 'Winter Wonderland', performed by both choirs together. Please enjoy!"

The woman scurried off to the side, letting Mr. Bramley take control. He signaled the pianist, who began playing.

The choir started singing, most of the boys singing the low parts on the right and most of the girl's singing the high parts on the left. Jack was right in the middle.

Ralph thought back to how Jack looked on the island with his group of boys behind him. He was tall, in charge, and most of all intimidating. Jack had exuded confidence, a fierce determination that made him seem larger than life.

But looking at him now, he looked small in a sea of older boys and girls, his shoulders slumped and posture hunched as if he was trying to make himself less noticeable.

Towards the end of the song, Ralph felt a pair of eyes staring at him. He instinctively looked up at Jack, but his eyes were not on him. He looked around the members, searching for who it was he felt stare at him so vigorously.

Ralph's eyes widened. He wasn't sure how he hadn't noticed him before.

There, in between two older boys, was Roger, singing alongside the rest of the choir.

Ralph must've been too hung up on that girl to even realize Roger was here as well. Not only here, but he was staring at him as well, eyes piercing right through him and burning holes into his head.

Ralph looked his way, and for a second Roger didn't bother turning away. They locked gazes and Roger's eyes burned right through him. Ralph felt vulnerable, like Roger knew exactly how Ralph was feeling, what he was thinking.

After a few seconds, Roger looked away, facing the rest of the audience, his eyes focused on them. Ralph let out a deep sigh, and scooted closer to his mother, feeling her sides press up against his.

Safe, he reminded himself.

Silent Night was probably the best out of all the songs the choirs sang. The lyrics, the melodies, and the overall feeling of the music was just incredible. At least, that's what Bridgette said when they were all finished. 

That woman stepped in front of the choir once more, taking the microphone into her hand, "Thank you all so much for joining us tonight. We all hope you had a wonderful time listening to our hard working choir students..."

The people in the pews began collecting their things, grabbing bags and purses they brought with them and hurrying out the door. As Bridgette grabbed their jackets, she turned over to Ralph and said, "Why don't you go talk to your friend while I get our things in place? Congratulate him."

Ralph agreed. One, because he felt like after the incident with Kane, Frank, Sydney, and Munish, he was obligated to do so. Second, because he once again saw that girl chatting up Jack, and the idea of interrupting their conversation even just for a moment made Ralph's anxious stomach calm down. 

Ralph made his way over to Jack and the girl, passing through adults and other kids his age, saying "Excuse me, pardon me," as he did so. On his way to Jack, Ralph saw Roger walking over to his mother, the woman who worked at their school's library. She was holding the hands of two other boys, with another littlun off to the side goofing around. Letting go of the boys' hands, she gently placed her hands on Roger's face, cupping his cheeks. She leaned in and kissed his forehead tenderly.

"I'm glad we pulled it off," Ralph heard the the girl tell Jack as he got closer. She had her hands behind her back, giving him a sweet look.

Jack smiled, "Same here."

"You sounded really good," The girl complimented, giving him another kind look.

"Thanks," he said, rubbing at the back of his neck, "I was actually a little nervous."

"You didn't look it," she teased, nudging him. 

Ralph jumped in, unable to take the back and forth between the two for any longer, "Hey!"

Jack turned towards Ralph with a confused look, like he didn't expect Ralph to come up to him, "Oh."

Ralph stood there awkwardly, looking back and forth between Jack and the girl. She had her hair tied up in a ponytail, a few loose strands framing her face. Her skin was fair and her cheeks had a rosy hue that matched her lips. She wore a simple yet elegant black dress that complimented her features nicely, paired with short black heels. Seeing her up close, Ralph realized just how pretty she was, which made him feel... odd. Eventually Ralph let out, "You did a great job, both of you."

The girl grinned, "Thanks!" She held out her hand, "I'm Sandra."

Ralph smiled back weakly, taking the girl's hand in his, "Ralph."

They shook, a bit of the tension in the air relieving. Sandra then gestured towards Jack, 

"Jack was so excited about this performance," Sandra said with a grin. "He practiced a lot."

Jack shrugged, "Well, I tried."

Ralph smiled, feeling a bit more at ease. "It definitely showed. You did a great job, Jack."

Jack's face went pink, and he smiled shyly, "Thanks."

Sandra nudged the blond boy, "Hey, if you enjoyed this one, you should come see our Spring Concert! I don't know what songs we'll be singing yet, but I'm sure it will be just as good as tonight."

Ralph chuckled, nodding in agreement, "I'm sure it will."

On the car ride home, Bridgette bopped her head to the music, humming and whistling along. She had a big grin on her face, making Ralph smile in return. 

"You have fun tonight?" Bridgette asked, not looking away from the road.

"Yes," Ralph responded, staring out the car window, "Did you?" Although he already knew the answer to that.

"Oh yes. Those kids know how to put on a show. They all have bright futures ahead of them."

Once home, Bridgette yawned, plopping down onto her bed, still in her Sunday dress. She tossed off her heels, as Ralph undid his tie. Soon Ralph was in bed, snuggling under his covers, tired after a long day. His mother came in, a proud look on her face.

Ralph laughed, "What?"

Bridgette sighed, "Nothing," She said, "I just love you."

Ralph smiled as Bridgette sat down on the side of his bed, hand brushed up against his forehead, "I love you too, Mummy."

Bridgette kissed her son goodnight, and brushing a stray lock of hair from his forehead. She whispered softly, "Sleep tight, my darling," before turning off the bedside lamp and quietly leaving the room.

Chapter Text

Despite all that's happened in the past few days, Ralph couldn't stop himself from thinking about that girl, Sandra. About her pretty brown eyes and her soft smile she gave him and Jack. It gnawed at Ralph, like a pit inside his stomach that was constantly getting deeper and deeper the more he thought about it. Perhaps the girl had a crush on Jack. That thought made Ralph feel even worse than before. Their interactions together played on a loop in his mind, examining each little thing they said and did.

There was only one conclusion Ralph could come to that made sense; he liked Sandra. It had to be. He'd only met her a couple days ago for a mere few minutes, but that was enough to develop a crush, right?

Ralph sat in bed, limbs spread out as he tousled his hair with his hand. Come to think of it, he'd never really had crushes before. He had a "girlfriend" in Year 2, Daphne-Maeve, who kissed him on the cheek once during recess, and therefore proclaimed herself his girlfriend to the entire class. It lasted only a couple weeks before she got bored and moved onto another boy, but it was one of the few times Ralph had a relationship with a girl.

Now, more boys were getting girlfriend's than ever. Every morning Gordon talks about his, the girl he danced with at the Autumn Dance, even more than Kane talks about Irene.

Now that Ralph thought about it, it's been a while since Kane's talked about her. Maybe during dinner he should ask how she's been doing, and maybe she'll know more about Sandra... Ralph wasn't sure what he would do with the information but he was sure it would be useful somehow.

Ralph dropped his bag on the ground next to Sydney, who was flipping through a comic book with Munish, showing him certain parts and pointing to them. Kane was reading a book, his brow furrowed with concentration. Ralph didn't want to interrupt him, but he was curious to know more about how his relationship with his girlfriend was going. Ralph tapped him on the shoulder and Kane set the book down on his lap, turning to face Ralph. "What is it?"

"Just wondering how's Irene been lately," Ralph smiled, leaning in to hear Kane better.

To his surprise, Kane groaned, rolling his eyes and pouting. Frank chimed in, "I don't know if Kane wants to talk about it..."

Ralph, curious, asks, "What happened?"

"We broke up."

Frank laughed, "She broke up with you."

"Shuddup, Frank!"

Ralph was bewildered. Just a month ago Kane was walking her home from school, as she lived nearby. What could have possibly happened between the two to make them want to break up?

As much as Ralph wanted to ask, he could see Kane was not in the mood to talk about it any further. He decided to drop it, for now anyway. Instead he opted for a pat on the shoulder and an "sorry" to help. He decided it also wouldn't be a good time to ask about if Irene knew Sandra or not. Perhaps later, but not right now.

"Do you two know of a girl named Sandra?" Ralph asked the next day, taking his pencils out of his satchel. It was the beginning of class, and he had just gotten Kane and Gordon's attention. They gave each other a look, then back at Ralph with a smile.

"I might've heard of her," Kane said, "Does her last name start with a 'C'?" Ralph could only shrug.

"No," Gordon said, folding his arms across his chest, "But if you want, I can ask Felicity for you. She might know her." Felicity was Gordon's girlfriend, the one he had been dancing with that night, the one who made Ralph feel so rigid inside.

Kane smirked. "Why, you like her?" 

Ralph blushed, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. "Maybe... she's in the choir, I met her a few nights ago at that event at church."

"Aww, Ralph has a crush," Kane teased, messing with Ralph's hair. Ralph laughed, shoving him away playfully. Gordon asked, "Was she cute?"

Ralph chuckled. "Uh, yeah, she was pretty."

Kane and Gordon gave each other another look, before the teacher walked in and started their lesson for the day. Ralph felt he should be happy. He might get to learn more about that nice girl he met. But something just wasn't sitting right with him, something he couldn't yet shake. 

To shake off that odd feeling from earlier, Ralph decided there was one more person to ask; Clive. Ralph walked up the bleachers with Clive and sat down, twiddling his thumbs as he worked up the nerve to ask. Finally, he let out, "Clive, do you have a girlfriend?"

Clive raised his brows, surprised at the question. His surprise shifted into a giddy smile, before responding, "No, but boy, I wish I did!" 

"What about Jeanette? How did the dance go with her?"

Clive suddenly frowned, looking away and down at his shoes, "Not great. She left half way through to be with her friends."

Ralph winced. Now probably wasn't a great time to ask about Sandra, either. "Sorry, Clive."

"S'alright, I'll find another girl," He said hopefully, that cheery smile on his face once more. It was infectious, and despite Ralph's resolve, he couldn't help smiling back. 

"Alright boys, P.E's over, to the locker rooms, now!" Mr. Sallow demanded, blowing his whistle as the boys raced each other over the their lockers. Clive and Ralph participated, with Ralph beating Clive by 4 seconds. It was better than yesterday, which had only been 2 seconds, and even better than when they started and Clive would beat Ralph. He should think about joining track, too, Ralph thought. 

As Ralph got changed, he suddenly felt a tap on his shoulder. He knew it probably wasn't Jack, but the worry that still lingered in his mind as he turned around. What he saw was a boy he didn't know, holding a white envelope with his name on it. 

"Here," The boy said, handing him the note in his hands.

"What's this?" Ralph asked, examining it carefully. It read, 'To Ralph Everly' on the front, and had a bunch of scribbled hearts on the back. 

"A note," The boy replied, shoving his hands into his pockets. Ralph resisted the urge to roll his eyes, "I know, but who's it from?"

The boy shrugged, "I'm not sure. My sister gave it to me, said it's from a girl in her class. She told me to give it to you." With that, he walked away and out of the locker room. 

Ralph shoved the note in his locker briefly as he continued changing. Once done, he took the note back out and unfolded it. Reading it's contents, it said:

Dear Ralph Everly,

I've seen you walking and hanging out outside from St. Elizabeth's. I think you're very handsome. I was wondering if maybe you wanted to go on a date sometime? I'm right across the street if you do! Please let me know.

Love,

Gillian Hollingworth

As Ralph read the note, he couldn't help but feel a sense of pride. This was exactly what'd he'd been looking for! A girl, a girl who was interested in him and wanted to be his girlfriend. Except, he didn't know who she was. She was a complete mystery to Ralph. He'd never heard of her before.

After school, Ralph decided to take matters into his own hands. He walked over to St. Elizabeth's. It was a short walk, each step feeling like he was stepping into a different world. As he passed through the girls, he decided he should ask one of them if they knew Gillian. 

He asked a handful of girls, each responding with a shrug or a no. Except for one girl, who simply smiled and said, "No. But whoever she is, she's lucky," and winked at him, friends giggling behind her. Ralph blushed, unsure how to respond to such a comment. "Thank you," he replied, and kept on looking.

Finally, he stopped a pretty colored girl walking towards the parking lot, purse in hand and satchel in the other, "Excuse me," Ralph said, continuing once he got her attention, "Do you know a girl named Gillian Hollingworth?"

The girl looked at him curiously, but nodded. "Yeah, I know her. She's hangs out over at the back of the school. Just go straight through there and you'll find her," She responded, pointing Ralph into the direction he had to go. Ralph gave the girl a nod and smile, thanking her for helping him.

Ralph wasn't sure how he was going to go about finding Gillian in a crowd of girls, any one of them being able to be his target. But once he found himself at the back of the school, he only saw two girls, backs against the wall and chatting with one another.

One had long, blonde hair, brown eyes, and the other had a short brown bob with green eyes. Ralph made his way over, card in hand, "Excuse me, ladies." Both girls looked over at him, "Do you either of you know a Gillian Hollingworth?"

Their eyes grew wide and they both smiled at each other, throwing their hands up excitedly: looks like I found her, Ralph thought.

The brown haired girl stepped forward, "That would be me," She smiled, hands behind her back, "Hi, Ralph. My brother gave me your name"

Ralph tried smiling back as best he could, but something gnawed at him as he did so. "Hi, Gillian. I got your note. It was very sweet, thank you."

Gillian beamed, "You're welcome! So, what do you think?" she asked, her eyes sparkling with anticipation.

Ralph took a deep breath, trying to muster the enthusiasm he thought he should feel. This was it, this was going to be his girlfriend, this was the moment he was waiting for. This was...

"I'm sorry, Gillian, you seem like a really nice girl, but I'm just not interested in dating right now. I hope you can understand."

Ralph had a list of different things he wanted to say in response, like "I accept," or "Let's go on a date", anything that signaled he returned this girl's feelings. 

But all that ended up coming out was rejection. He didn't understand why. 

Gillian's face immediately fell, her bright smile fading. "Oh," she said softly, looking down at her feet, "I understand."

She looked back up, giving a weak smile, before nodding to her friend. The two said their goodbyes to Ralph before walking away. From a distance, he could hear faint sniffling and a whisper of, "It's ok, at least you tried."

A wave of guilt hit Ralph. Suddenly, he felt like a monster. Why couldn't he just accept her confession? Why couldn't he accept Julia dancing with him? Why couldn't he accept Daphne-Maeve proclaiming herself as his girlfriend? What was wrong with him?

Ralph stood there for a moment, feeling the weight of his decision. He turned back and started walking towards the front of the school, his thoughts in a jumble.

As he approached the front of the school, he saw the same girl from before, walking his way. "Hey," she shouted, a smile on her face, "How'd it go?"

Ralph sighed, shaking his head. "Not great."

The girl stopped, smile shifting to a frown. "She rejected you?"

"No, I rejected her."

"Oh," She replied, a look of sympathy on her face, "Poor girl."

Ralph cringed. "Yeah..."

Ralph and the girl exchanged an awkward glance before he turned to head back toward his school. He could hear her calling out a final, "I hope things get better!" but he barely registered it.

As Ralph made his way back to St. Domonic's, it didn't take him long to realize something was not right. He looked around, studying all the cars left in the parking lot. His mother's car was missing among them. Ralph walked back into the school and at the entrance's clock. She should have been there ten minutes ago. Ralph walked back out, wondering if perhaps he just missed it. But alas, after another few minutes of searching, her car was no where to be found. With nothing else to do, Ralph sat on the side walk, head in hands, and waited for his mother's arrival.

An hour passed, and there was still no sign of her anywhere. His worry deepened, hoping his mother was alright. She was never this late to pick him up. The chilly evening air felt heavier with each passing moment, and the quiet of the deserted parking lot only added to his growing unease.

Just as he was beginning to contemplate his next steps, a car pulled up beside him. Ralph saw a familiar looking woman at the wheel. When she rolled down her window, he recognized who it was: Donna, Jack's aunt.

"Honey, are you ok?" She asked, concern etched into her features. Ralph looked in the passenger seat beside her, seeing Jack looking out the other window next to him.

"Yes, I'm alright," Ralph answered, though then said, "I... I just can't find my mother. She was supposed to pick me up an hour ago."

Donna put her hand to her chest, "Oh, you poor thing! You shouldn't be out here alone!" She gestured to the car, "Come, we'll drive you home."

Ralph hesitated, glancing back at Jack, who was now looking over at him with a blank expression on his face. Ralph shivered. He didn't like all this time he's been spending with him. That concert was the last Ralph wanted to spend near Jack for a very long time, preferably ever. 

But as he turned to look back at the school, he remembered that the woman at the desk had already left by then. There was no other way to get to his mother now. The only option left was Donna's offer.

Ralph turned back to the car, sighing as he nodded. Donna smiled warmly at him. Ralph opened the car door, his eyes immediately recognizing Matilda, who he hadn't seen initially. She smiled widely, her excitement palpable. "Hi Ralph!"

The blond boy smiled, waving as he took a seat. "Hi, Matilda."

The car ride over was a bit awkward. Jack didn't say a word, just stared out the window in silence, while Matilda's chatter filled the car as she excitedly shared snippets of her day. Ralph listened, but would occasionally zone out from boredom. Thankfully, Matilda didn't seem to notice. 

"So, then we went to the park, and I got to swing really high! And Mabel was pretending to be a pirate, it was so funny!" The girl continued, her animated storytelling punctuated by bursts of laughter.

Ralph offered a half-hearted smile, his attention drifting as he gazed out the window at the passing scenery. He noticed the familiar landmarks of his neighborhood drawing closer, and with them, a sense of relief.

Soon enough, Donna pulled up in front of Ralph’s house. Ralph quickly gathered his things and hopped out, glancing back at Donna and Matilda as he did so. "Thank you again, Mrs. Merridew."

Donna smiled. "You're very welcome, Ralph."

Ralph headed up to his front door, satchel over his shoulder. He knocked, listening for any sound or shuffling inside. But all he got in return was silence. He knocked again, a bit firmer and louder this time, and waited patiently. Still, no answer, no sound. Ralph's face scrunched up with anxiety. His mother's car was in the driveway, she must've been home.

After a few more minutes of knocking and waiting, Donna called out from the car. "Is everything alright, dear?"

Ralph turned back to the car, stomach doing flips. "No one's answering..."

Donna frowned. She opened the car door and stepped outside, walking towards the front door where Ralph stand. She firmly knocked, calling out. "Hello! Hello?"

The silence that followed was unnerving. Ralph felt his heart pound in his chest. Matilda and Jack were now both looking over at the scene, curious looks on their faces. Donna put her hands on her hips, and turned to Ralph. "Do you have a spare key?"

Ralph shook his head, feeling a knot of anxiety tightening in his chest. "No, we don’t keep one. Mummy never liked the idea of that."

Donna sighed, glancing back at the house. "I have to be home soon and make dinner," she muttered to herself, putting her hand to her chin. She looks back at Ralph, "How about... how about you come home with us. We can call her from there."

Ralph frowned at the suggestion. The idea of spending more time with Jack made his stomach churn. He had hoped to get away from him after the ride home, not be stuck in his company even longer. But as he looked back at the silent, locked house, he realized he still didn’t have much of a choice.

"...Alright..."