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Something important to deal with Cronus: it's easy.
It's easy because Kankri is already used to deal with Porrim. They are just genderflipped in how they behave with him. Porrim would be pretty hurt if he told her that though.
Hard to not notice when Kankri felt he was needed somewhere, and proceeded to where Cronus was.
It triggered him so badly he couldn't do what he came to do, tell Cronus off for his use of intelectual slurs.
"Don't touch me. NO NO NO NO NO" It was. Pretty clear. Mituna was clearly advocating for himself, as Kankri had explained to him to do after he became disabled. He was doing well, but it was one-sided.
Because Cronus didn't care and kept going forward with it. Touchy. His shoulders, probably a place not many people would accuse him of bad touching, of making it sexual.
Did it matter that it wasn't sexual?
Was that why Porrim could too, override his consent and touch him as she wanted?
Kankri's head felt foggy all day after that, as he wandered away to stop seeing it. Stop seeing himself in Mituna's place. Latula would be disappointed.
He was disappointed in himself. But this sweater of hers still covered his body, and he still had hopes.
Porrim was good. Everybody said so.
So he had to defend Cronus regardless of how Cronus was overly pushy, overly touchy.
Because touching faces or shoulders is not abuse.
It is, it can be, he knows that it is, he advocates clearly for himself every time, right?
Kankri doesn't want to have a bad relationship with Porrim. Even if she believed he did.
Tragedy and comedy are mixed up inside his blood pusher. Pure terror.
"Kanny, what's wr+ong? Yo+u are spacing o+ut." She greeted him, kind like always. He held himself over the urge to cry on her lap. That wasn't all she is, a mother for all his problems. "Co+me here, did so+meo+ne escape again? Yo+u kno+w no+bo+dy can handle this many ho+urs..."
Besides her. Yes, he knows. She's the only one who wants to listen, and even Porrim is just so tired of his one-sided sermons.
She wipes a tear rolling of him, like cullers to their wriggler, and something in him explodes.
He probably says some really bad things, Kankri isn't thinking too well. Are they things he believes in? Are they appropriate and not triggering in any way?
Does she understands how terrible it feels to be triggered?
She looked disappointed at him, as if it was his fault that he didn't tenderly accepted her touch. He felt guilty too.
But it would be worse to submit.
When Cronus comes up to be a bother, he talks like usual. Trying to cheer the man up is easier than talking to Porrim it seems.
They aren't close so Kankri feels strong enough to fight back if Cronus cross his boundaries.
Their friendship might be hollow, but if Cronus is occupied, he isn't bothering other people. If he could be satisfied with himself...
If Porrim realized she's enough by herself.
Kankri blinked, trying to keep the figures speaking consistently.
He understands, really. Why Porrim is like that, and why Cronus is too. It's not the same, they just cope similarly to different things.
And Kankri himself can't say much, because what if Cronus asks? "Why didn't you stop me then?" Kankri will have to say something, and he has nothing he can say yet.
To say he was triggered about it, would Cronus even care? The seadweller is a whirlpool of dark water, and would just swallow him in.
Porrim, who searches for control in life, enough to become what she despised and feared. Cronus, with a hungry blood pusher who keeps losing what he wants, nothing ever be stays anyway, so nothing is ever enough.
And Kankri can't give what they want and make them settle down. Can't stop them from hurting him and others like that in the process.
Of course, he cares because of Latula. She would be hurt if he didn't do anything to defend Mituna after all his lip service. It's not because he used to play video games with Mituna, who slipped out from his fingers and became a frustrated caricature of himself.
Kankri doesn't like looking at people's eyes, but that helmet is in the way. He just need to see it.
See if he's right about why Mituna is lost for good.
