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The whistling, ashen fields of Concordia were silent.
Here, where they made their home among scraggly trees, hidden in the most secluded parts of the moon for safety- it was rarely quiet. There was always the voices of his aliit1- traveling easily through the sparse underbrush- and the other Clans were not far away- but now, it was silent.
That, of course, should get any parent worried.
Ahsoka was a frightening fragile child. A brave one, yes. A fierce one, without a doubt. A Mandalorian one, certainly- but fragile. She was prone to fainting spells and seizures- always had been. It was like she was mir'shupurla2- but born that way. It would've been concerning, already, especially after the best baar'ure3 they had access to turned up nothing, but when one lived in the wilderness, surrounded by places where a collapsing ad4 could be seriously hurt?
It was another kind of fear.
Thankfully- he did not find her bleeding or unconscious in an old trac'palon5- although she was in one. She sat with her back to one edge of the crater, curled up with her head in her arms and her knees tight to her chest.
"Trac'ika6." He said, trying to sound firm. "You didn't come when I called."
She didn't respond- keeping her little head ducked down. The worry came back in full force, then. Was she injured in some way that he couldn't see? Was this another one of her fainting spells?
He was careful when he picked his way into the trac'palon. For all that they were certain that any explosives had been removed- or else they certainly would not have allowed their ade7 to run wild in the forest- old habits died hard, and he was of the generation that had fought on the front lines of the civil war.
Slowly, slowly, he sat down besides her.
"Trac'ika?" He put one, gentle hand on her shoulder. "Are you alright?"
She whimpered. And her voice came out tiny- not at all the bright, loud ad'ika8 he knew.
"They said m' not really part of the family."
Abruptly, he felt his blood turn to ice.
It was true that Ahsoka stood out among other members of Clan Tano. The rest of them were human, after all- and she clearly wasn't. Everyone knew that she wasn't- in everything that she did, not only in her appearance. She ate more meat than they did, and things that they ate could make her very ill. She climbed better than any human child her age, ran faster than them- but she also could not tell the differences between different shades of the same color, and loud noises hurt her little montrals so very, very badly.
Sometimes, it was hard to know what she needed- but at least the nearest other Togruta was in Clan Beyano, right down the river, a fellow former Breshig'ad9.
All the same, all the same- the other Clans knew that she was one of them.
"Who?" He didn't bother to hide his vitriol.
She didn't answer, his trac'ika- keeping her little head bowed down, without even looking at him.
Slowly, slowly, he took in a deep breath, then let it out.
Ahsoka had always been so attuned to what was going on around her- she never liked it when people were angry. He should've known better, even if it wasn't directed towards her- and it never would be, if he had anything to say about it- she always got so upset by it.
"They're liars, ad." He said, instead. "You know this- in our language, there is no difference made between an adopted child or a biological child or a step-child. It's all the same. Aliit ori'shya tal'din10"
Still no response. He leaned back and sighed.
"You know- if you want to talk bui'tsad11- you probably have more warrior blood in you than I do."
That prompted her to react. She jerked her head up, blinking unshed tears out of her eyes. "What?"
He smiled and moved the hand he had on her shoulder to wrap his arm around her. His trac'ika curled into his side. "Your biological mother- for all that she was not Mando'ad12- she sure did have her share of Mandokar13. It takes a kind of bravery I can't even imagine to face down Kyr'tsad14 without beskar of your own."
Ahsoka had a starry kind of wonder in her eyes- he'd never discussed how he'd come to adopt her, after all- despite her insistence on continuing to deny her own merit. "But you're a warrior! You're a bounty hunter!"
He chuckled. "That may be true, ad'ika- but while all Mandalorians are warriors, we were not always employed through it. Before our exile, Clan Tano- we were engineers, not bounty hunters."
"I know." She said, pressing her face into his arm. And, huh- that was funny. He didn't think that he'd told her about that part of their history, before. Not many spoke about their lives before the war- it brought too much shame, reminded them too much of the honor that they had lost.
Maybe she'd heard about it from her bar'buire15? He'd have to ask them when they got back to their vheh'yaim16.
But, well- Ahsoka often knew things she wasn't supposed to know. He blamed it on her sharper hearing- in the thin walls of their home, she probably overheard every conversation.
"Your biological mother-" He changed topics back to the task at hand. "All she had to defend herself with was a blaster rifle and a hunting knife- but she had no fear when she fought enemies with flame-throwers and rockets and armor that her weapons could not pierce. She even killed one- she was smart enough to think instead of panicking, when she realized that their beskar reflected her blaster- so she shot one through the throat. Few have that presence of mind."
Maybe, for any other people, a story like this one would not be considered appropriate for a child of Ahsoka's very young age- but they were Mandalorians. The stories he had grown up on were hardly any different.
"But they killed her, didn't they?" Ahsoka asked, her voice sounding distant, for all that she was right there next to him.
And- well.
"That they did." He admitted, ducking his head down to brush his forehead against her's in Keldabe17. "We would not be here right now if they did not- but she was very, very brave."
"And then what?"
"Well-" He started. "You know that our Clan has been in conflict with Kyr'tsad for a long time. We were more passionate about it, then- my friends from other Clans and I, and your ba'vodu18- we had been tracking them, trying to stamp them out."
His trac'ika was spellbound, hanging on every word.
The next words came a bit harder. After all, for all that Ahsoka was Mando'ad- there was such a thing as too much detail, for someone of less than three years of age. He needed to say what needed to be said with care. "We came upon them in the tail-end of their fight with your mother and her people- and we fought them off. Your mother was dying, and she entrusted you to me. I promised her that I would protect you, and that I would raise you to protect yourself. I said the Gai Bal Manda19 right there- with her as my witness."
"And that's it?"
Well- he could wait to tell her some of the more gruesome details- about the fire, and the massacre, and what had happened to the other children when she was a bit older. She was far, far too young for it, now. "That's it- then I took you home to meet your ba'buire and your ju'vod20. And that was that."
Ahsoka didn't say anything, in response.
He sighed.
"Say, why don't I take you on some training off-planet?" He asked. Yes- Ahsoka was young for it, but- well. Kyr'tsad counted an adult right at thirteen, so it would be important to get her started early. Not to mention- they didn't even always follow that rule. Demagolyc dar'mandase21.
"Really?"
"Yes, really."
"Can I hold your blaster?"
He laughed, and scooped her up in one arm as he stood- using the other to hold his helmet. "Maybe when you're old enough to shoot it without falling over, trac'ika."
1. Aliit: Family. Back
2. Mir'shupurla: The adjective form of the noun "mir'shupur", which means "brain damage." Back
3. Baar'ure: Medics/Healers/Doctors. Back
4. Ad: Child. Back
5. Trac'palon: Made up by me. Taken from "tracyn" for "fire" and "palon" for "hole." Used to refer to the crater in the ground left behind after an explosion. Back
6. Trac'ika: Made up by me. The diminutive form of "tracyn." "A little fire," it is used by Ahsoka's adoptive father as a term of endearment, referring to both her (normally) spitfire attitude as well as the fact that he literally pulled her out of a fire. Back
7. Ade: Children. Back
8. Ad'ika: The diminutive form of child. Back
9. Breshig'ad: Made up by me. "From the planet Breshig." Back
10. Aliit ori'shya tal'din: "Family is more than blood." Back
11. Bui'tsad: One's biological lineage. Back
12. Mando'ad: Mandalorian. Back
13. Mandokar: The virtues that a Mandalorian is supposed to show. Back
14. Kyr'tsad: Death Watch. Back
15. Ba'buire: Grandparents, aka the narrator's parents. Back
16. Vheh'yaim: A type of Mandalorian home constructed from wattle and daub. Intended to be temporary, although sometimes that "temporary" can last several years. That is the case here, as Clan Tano does have a permanent family estate that they cannot return to, since they are in exile on Concordia with all the other Old Mandalorians. Back
17. Keldabe: Originating from wearing helmets, a Keldabe kiss- tapping your foreheads together- was a way to show affection when actual kissing was impossible. Technically, it was only ever used romantically in Legends (and doesn't appear at all in Canon), but I think the idea of it also being used in familial and platonic contexts is the bee's knees. If the French can kiss each other on the cheek and mean nothing romantic by it, I can make the fictional characters tenderly headbutt each other. Back
18. Ba'vodu: Aunt. Can also mean uncle, but in this context it means aunt. Back
19. Gai Bal Manda: The Mandalorian adoption ceremony, which consists of a vow. Back
20. Ju'vod: Made up by me. Somehow, I could not find any record of a Mandalorian word for "cousin", which surprised me. Taken from "juann", meaning "next to", and "vod", meaning "sibling." Back
21. Demagolyc Dar'Mandase: The adjective form of "demagolka" and the plural form of "dar'manda." Demagolka refers to a real-life, terrible monster, by analogy to a historical war criminal that Mandalorians hate, fear, and are disgusted by. "Dar'manda" means "former Mandalorian"- which means that you have lost your purpose, soul, and honor. Back