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Unlike most of the alien races that approached the Earth, the Kycirrian delegation waited patiently at the edge of Earth space and waited to be hailed. They explained that they had come to make a treaty of peace and brotherhood with the residents of the planet.
Like all things alien the Justice League took point, they would run the treaty by the United Nations before signing it, mostly as a gesture of goodwill, but they would handle the negotiations.
The Kycirrian peoples were slightly smaller than humans, their tallest member reaching barely five feet. They varied in color from deep oranges, pastel peach, and sunrise yellow to ocean blue and midnight indigo. They all had white curls worn in elaborate updos around their heads. Their faces were nearly human standard excepting the three eyes, one facing forward, and one to each side. Their hands were four fingered and those fingers were long and delicate looking. They wore pants and tunics with intricate embroidery and even in some cases jewels, in a variety of colors and textures. They each had ornate looking translators in their pointed ears and around their throats.
They seemed to enjoy their tour of the Watchtower, comparing and contrasting the technology to their own. They seemed to be a warm and genuine people with a vibrant sort of intelligence and overall, a delight. The problem started when it came time for negotiations.
“We will of course be waiting until the Earth’s Greatest Champion can join us.” The lead delegate said in a very matter of fact way. Clark could hear the capitalization in the title.
“Greatest Champion?” Clark asked, he was unsure who that would be, if he had to make a guess he’d say Wonder Woman, but she was already among the assembled.
“Yes, I am surprised he was not here to greet us, but he must be a very busy man, we speak of course of the benevolent and just Red Hood.” There was a moment of stunned quiet throughout the assembled heroes that had come to be a part of negotiations before the whispers broke out.
“How do you know of the Red Hood?” Batman questioned remembering at the last moment to make it a question and not a demand.
“The Red Hood is a hero among the Kycirrians, not only did he save our Princess, now Queen from a fate worse than death at the hands of her corrupt uncle, he then organized the peoples of Kycirria to revolt and throw down the repressive yoke of the Imposter’s men.” The Kycirrians had stars in their eyes as they spoke of the crime lord/vigilante. As if he were a mythic folk hero. “He himself was given the honor of crowning Queen Fy'ynilia, she tried to make him her King but he spoke so poignantly of his home that it moved the Queen to tears and she couldn’t bear to keep him from it.”
Batman looked ready to choke on his own tongue and Clark was feeling rather poleaxed himself. Red Hood liberating a planet? Red Hood being helpful and not causing massive chaos? Seems fake. The Kycirrians were not finished.
“He is of course the reason that once we pulled ourselves together we ventured to Earth, any planet that could produce a hero such as the Red Hood must be a truly marvelous place, one we would be honored to be allied with.” It was making Clark a little uncomfortable to be praised so much for no real reason.
“Of course then you would want your hero present,” Diana said conciliatorily, “that’s very understandable, he is not here at the present, but if you’ll allow us to send someone to retrieve him, I’m sure he’d be pleased to know you asked for him.” Diana said diplomatically. Clark wondered how in the world they were going to get the Red Hood to agree to come to the Watchtower? And who to send? Hood was likely to turn Bruce down just on principle, and his own last interaction with the man hadn’t gone smoothly.
“Wonder Woman should go and retrieve him,” Bruce said, interrupting Clark’s inner thoughts. Hood had been very fond of Diana as a child, maybe he still held on to that fondness. “If you are amiable I’d like to start preliminary talks, I am Red Hood’s father, he would have final say of course but we could get started on the little things while we wait.” Bruce said politely, mimicking their more formal speech patterns. There was excited chattering amongst the Kycirrians.
“The father of the Red Hood! I see your similar chest decorations. You must be so very proud,” Bruce’s face soured momentarily before going carefully blank.
“Intensely,” he said through gritted teeth. Negotiations were begun, while they waited with not so high hopes that Diana would bring back the Hood.
Jason was idly sitting in his living room, reading Jane Austen and pondering lunch when there was a knock on the door. Probably Rosie from next door wanting him to take a look at some other problem in her apartment. The landlord rarely ever fixed shit around here, but Jason was handy enough, and willing to help, especially in exchange for Rosie’s empanadas.
It was not Rosie.
“How can I help you on this fine day?” He asked Wonder Woman while leaning against the door frame, purposefully not letting her through the threshold.
“We have an intergalactic problem that only you can solve.” Jason just blinked in shock, not what he was expecting. He lifted a brow in question. “Surely it would be better to discuss this inside away from prying ears.” That’s when Jason noticed the little group of kids peeking around the corner. Well, this safehouse was well and truly burnt now, a shame he really liked it. Jason sighed but moved into the apartment and waved her in.
“So, an intergalactic problem?” He prompted, mostly to stop her from her obvious perusal of his home.
“Yes, aliens have approached Earth for what they called a treaty of peace and brotherhood. They however refuse to negotiate with anyone other than you.” Also not what he expected, he was thinking more bounty hunters after his head, but he could roll with this.
“Who?”
“A people called the Kycirrians, they say you rescued their Queen and saved their people.” Jason thought for a moment before he placed the name, his face lit up in a smile.
“Kycirria! That place was the best, I got to cause a revolution, depose a false King and they loved what I could do with explosives, great time,” Jason reminisced. “Got stranded there while on my own, had to wait ages for Arsenal and Starfire to find me, a revolution cured the boredom.” Wonder Woman looked amused.
“So you’ll come and help with the negotiations then?”
“What’s in it for me?” He asked, it was better not to give the Justice League anything for free; they might think he’d gone soft.
“Our undying gratitude,” Wonder Woman said flatly.
“How about one favor, to be specified later.” He countered.
“No killing or breaking interplanetary laws,” she said quickly, he rolled his eyes.
“Duh. I guess I’m going to be a dignitary, let me get dressed.” He moved before turning back with narrowed eyes. “How’d you find me by the way?”
“I couldn’t say,” she answered with a grin. Ugh.
“Batman got another tracker on me didn’t he, I’m getting sloppy.” She laughed as he went to his room to get geared up.
They had managed to bang out a rough draft by the time Diana returned, leading a fully armed Red Hood into the room. He had hoped she would have talked him out of his guns.
“Pollion, Sefirra, long time no see.” Hood said when he stepped into the room, the two Kycirrians that had been singled out gasped.
“You remember us, we are honored.” Hood stutter stepped for a moment.
“Of course I remember you guys, I like to think we’re friends, leading a revolution together is a real bonding activity.” Hood explained after gently clasping forearms with the two.
“Yes, we are friends.” The midnight skinned Kycirrian said in awe. They had spent most of the time Diana had been gone regaling everyone with tales of Hood’s valor, honor, and battle prowess. Clark was both impressed and very tired of it. He wondered idly how Hood would respond to the race's obvious fawning.
“Alright, to business then,” Hood stated sitting at the only open seat which happened to be next to Batman, neither man seemed happy about that. Hood removed his helmet with a pneumatic hiss. The ones among the Justice League who didn’t know Hood’s identity started murmuring again, this time about his youth. Clark himself often forgot how young Jason was.
“You honor us by showing your true face.”
Hood looked startled, before turning to smile genuinely to the Kycirrians.
“Of course,” was all he said before picking up the notes and rough draft of the treaty. “Oh no this won’t work,” he picked up a pen and struck something off the treaty. “You guys,” he started staring at the Kycirrian delegation, “Ty’ylonium is too precious to give away three pieces.” He turned to the Justice League and explained. “Ty’ylonium is a precious metal used to make only holy artifacts, it has religious, cultural, and historic value as well as being tremendously rare. Three pieces of their holy relics would be a great loss.” Around the table heads nodded, Clark felt a small, burgeoning bit of respect for the Hood blossom in his chest.
“We’d never want to deprive you of your holy relics.” Clark said in a firm voice when the Kycirrians started to insist. “Having one on Earth would be an honor, but we couldn’t possibly take more.”
“You heard the man,” Hood, Jason, said, before diving back into the contract.
After hours of debate and polite bickering they hammered out an agreement. Jason intervened much more in favor of the Kycirrians than the humans but wasn’t unfair to either. And though he seemed to take delight in frustrating his father he seemed to take his job very seriously.
After they were finished Jason moved to sit with the aliens and began to talk to them in earnest, asking about their lives and their Queen. He even blushed when they mentioned that she still pined for him, even though she had recently agreed to a marriage. They were sure she would back out if he desired to become their King. Jason blushed even more furiously at that and Clark smothered a laugh. One Jason heard judging from his glare.
“Oh yes please,” he heard, but not what the suggestion was.
“You’re cooking is delicious, and we would very much enjoy it if you would make us food. Yes indeed.” Had Jason offered to cook for the delegation? Jason looked as confused as he did.
“I meant to order you pizza, an Earth delicacy, but if the Watchtower kitchen is stocked, I suppose I could make it,” Jason hedged. “I’ll need some helpers though.” Clark could smother his laugh this time as all of the delegates fought like small children to be chosen as his helpers. Clark decided that if they didn’t have ingredients for pizza he’d go himself to get them just to see the fearsome Red Hood cooking.
It was all fun and games until the Riv’ns arrived looking to parlay with the Great Lord Red Hood, and the Sygs after them. At this rate they might have to make Red Hood their official ambassador, that or bar him from space.
