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“Rin…”
Nagi’s voice rang out, barely a whisper over the sound of his headphones, but still so piercing and sharp and not something he could easily ignore. But he could pretend he didn’t hear it, simply because he wanted to. He didn’t want to talk yet, even though Nagi had given him over an hour to cool off. He was still stewing in his own anger, and he just needed to shoot a few hundred more zombies in his video game before he would be satisfied and able to face Nagi again.
And it wasn’t even that he was that mad at Nagi…okay. He was actually. He was very mad at Nagi, but he was more angry at himself for getting so incredibly upset over something so trivial and stupid that he needed to seclude himself for the entire afternoon.
“Rin.” Nagi spoke again, raising his voice just that much higher to be heard more clearly over the sound of Rin’s game. Rin felt his shoulders tense,and he knew Nagi could tell that he was heard, because Nagi stood right beside him, waiting in silence for Rin to finish the level he was on. The respect of a gamer.
But having Nagi right at his elbow definitely didn’t help anything. Slamming his controller down as he died in game, Rin whipped around to glare up at his boyfriend, yanking his headphones to rest around his neck.
“You’re still mad…” Nagi stated, sounding disappointed by the fact. Rin rubbed his forehead, wondering what Nagi could have expected. They had just argued a few hours prior, and they hadn’t yet talked. Nagi knew how tightly Rin held on to his anger, and yet he was… what… surprised? At the fact that Rin was still angry.
“Of course, I’m still mad.”
Nagi nodded, hands behind his back as he rocked from foot to foot. He looked like he was thinking…what about, Rin could only guess.
“Seishiro, what is it?”
Pulling a bag out from behind his back, he held it out to Rin, waiting until he took it from him before saying “I’m sorry.”
Frowning, Rin opened the bag, looking into it to see snacks and drinks and an ice cream bar from the convenience store closest to their apartment. The plastic convenience store bag crinkled as he placed it on his desk before crossing his arms over his chest.
“Do you even know why you’re apologizing?”
Nagi hesitated, his eyebrows furrowing together as he stared down at his feet. He looked back at Rin before shaking his head, mumbling “I’m sorry for making you mad.”
Rubbing the skin of his forehead as he sighed, Rin looked up at Nagi. Of course he didn’t understand. Communication was never one of their strong suits as a couple. Rin would get angry over something that really shouldn’t have been a big deal, and Nagi would misinterpret his anger as being due to something else completely off the mark. They often had a hard time connecting the dots, but Nagi always tried to apologize, even if he wasn’t sure what he had done wrong to set the moody Rin’s temper alight.
It was frustrating, but Rin tried to not let his temper get the best of him as he breathed in deeply through his nose. He understood…this was his fault as well. If he explained the things that Nagi did or said that made him upset, then Nagi wouldn’t be left clueless. Nagi tended to act earnestly, and said things that may come off as brash, but it was often because he felt like they were the best thing to say.
Other times, Nagi was just absolutely clueless. Like today.
“I’m angry because…” Saying it out loud almost sounded too stupid, but he had to bite the bullet and just spit it out if he had really just spent the last few hours moping. “Because I don’t like that you spent all day with Reo, and then fell asleep on me ten minutes after you got home.”
“Oh…” Nagi mumbled, looking genuinely apologetic as he hung his head, knowing that this isn't the first time he’s done this. It’s just the first time Rin has gotten so mad about it. He had held it in all night, just to blow up on him the next day over it. But how could he have known Rin would get so angry over him spending time with Reo?
“And before you get started, it's not about Reo specifically, ” Rin continued, making sure that for once, he fully explained himself, so maybe Nagi would get it this time. “It’s us planning for days to do something, and then you put your stupid friend first and then we can’t do our thing.”
Ah. That made much more sense to Nagi, Rin thought. He could tell from the way Nagi’s eyes lit up, and from the unfortunately teasing smirk curling the corners of his lips. He couldn’t even say anything else before Nagi suggested “You’re jealous.”
“What, no , what do I have to be jealous about?” Crossing his arms over his chest again, Rin tried to turn away and re-engage with his video game, but Nagi stopped him, grabbing the arm of his chair and turned him back around to face him again.
“You’re jealous,” Nagi stated again, nodding his head as if he confirmed a mystery fact. Rin shook his head,trying to deny it as Nagi nodded again. “I’m sorry for making you feel like that. Reo just wouldn’t take me home when I asked him to.”
Rin rolled his eyes, trying to turn away again before Nagi grabbed his chair, setting his giant body down in Rin’s lap as if he were as tiny as a lap dog. Wrapping his arms around Nagi’s waist so his oaf of a boyfriend didn’t fall, Rin waited until Nagi got comfortable, arms wrapped around his shoulders as he sighed in contentment.
“Pleased with yourself?” Rin asked, considering dumping Nagi onto the floor.
“Quite. But you know, Rin-chan, you’re more important to me than anyone, right?” Nagi asked, bumping his forehead against Rin’s lightly, nudging him as he waited for Rin to answer.
“I mean, I guess-”
“Because it’s true. I’m really sorry I hurt your feelings and made you feel jealous of Reo. I just didn’t think it mattered too much when we’ve put that show off on netflix for a couple weeks now.”
Rin sighed, shaking his head as his legs started to go numb. Pushing Nagi onto the floor seemed more and more appealing every moment.
“Maybe I overreacted…” Rin admitted, not wanting to admit his imperfections and mistakes. It was always just so easy to jump to jealous conclusions, even if it really shouldn’t have been that big of a deal. Jealousy was just something he had grown accustomed to over the years, between soccer and his brother and his friendships… He always became territorial and jealous over the things that were important to him, and Nagi was no exception.
“Maybe, but I still should’ve tried harder to get home…and stay awake. I knew it was important to you and I didn’t do anything to make sure we got to watch.” Nagi nuzzled his nose against the side of Rin’s face before standing up, holding a hand out to him. “Can we watch it now? Since I got you all your favorite snacks and things.”
Rin accepted Nagi’s hand, allowing it to pull himself out of his desk chair. When he was standing, he nodded once to let Nagi know he agreed. Nagi grinned, his soft, sleepy smile always a comfort when Rin let his emotions get the best of him. Nagi stepped forward, wrapping his arms around Rin and pulling him into a quick hug. Before moving away, he set his chin on Rin’s shoulder, sighing happily as they embraced, knowing he hadn’t ruined his relationship because of Reo.
“Rin-chan is the only one who matters to me,” Nagi repeated, squeezing him tightly before pulling away, patting at Rin’s shoulders with both hands.
And he knew that. He knew Nagi would always put him first when it mattered.