Work Text:
Generally speaking, James had very few days off. Occupational hazard, he supposed, but it was rather unfortunate. So when he did get a day completely free, he always did one thing in particular: nothing.
Or, he tried to.
(Tony Stark didn’t really understand the meaning of the word ‘nothing’.)
~
(1 Unread Message)
11:47
Tones: I need a favor
Honey Bear: I’m not bailing you out of jail, lying to Pepper for you, hiring you a stripper, giving the suit back, or starting another Avengers feud.
Tones: Well
Tones: Ouch
Honey Bear: Sorry.
Tones: I wasn’t even going to ask for one of those things
Honey Bear: Tony, I’ve done at least two of those things for you in the past six months. Don’t even start.
Tones: I
Tones: Whatever
Tones: Anyway
Tones: I need you to pick up Peter
Honey Bear: Peter?
Honey Bear: Why do you need me to pick up your intern?
Tones: The school called
Tones: He has a really high fever
Honey Bear: I have so many questions right now.
Tones: Join the club
Honey Bear: Why did the school call you?
Tones: They didn’t
Tones: They called his aunt but she’s at work and can’t pick him up
Tones: I would pick him up but I’m currently in London
Tones: So
Tones: Help a guy out?
Honey Bear: Will they even let me take him? I’m definitely not on their pre-approved list.
Tones: Do you really think they’re going to stop War Machine?
Tones: Really?
Tones: After those inspirational videos you did?
Honey Bear: That’s not even a little bit funny.
Tones: I’m hilarious
Honey Bear: Sure.
Honey Bear: So you want me to just walk in there, and take him where?
Tones: Back to the tower
Tones: FRIDAY will watch him
Honey Bear: We’re letting the computer watch a sick kid?
Tones: I mean
Tones: A highly advanced computer
Tones: But yes
Honey Bear: Is that really the best idea?
Tones: It’s the one we got
Tones: Unless you’re willing to stick around and do it
Honey Bear: I don’t know how to watch kids.
Tones: You don’t know how to watch a kid that’ll just be sleeping or watching Disney movies?
Honey Bear: Well, I know how to do that.
Tones: Thought so
Tones: So you’ll stay with him?
Honey Bear: If he’s okay with it, then sure.
Tones: Okay with it?
Tones: Platypus
Tones: You’ll probably make his month
~
12:04
war machine: Hey, Tony said you’re not feeling well.
Peter Parker: yea
Peter Parker: its cool tho
Peter Parker: the nurse gave me medicine
Peter Parker: idk what thats going to do
Peter Parker: but she gave me some
war machine: The medicine’s probably to lower the fever, but if it’s not working, then that’s another problem. Would a nap help?
Peter Parker: i mean
Peter Parker: prob
Peter Parker: but my calc teacher yelled at me last time i tried to sleep in her class
Peter Parker: so thats not happening
war machine: Well, I was thinking more along the lines of sleeping at the Tower, where Calc teachers can’t yell at you.
Peter Parker: mr starks in london tho
war machine: Right, but I’m not.
war machine: I can pick you up.
Peter Parker: oh
Peter Parker: OH
Peter Parker: WAIT
Peter Parker: NO
Peter Parker: YOURE BUSY
Peter Parker: I DONT WANT TO BOTHER YOU
Peter Parker: IM SORRY
Peter Parker: IM GOOD
war machine: I wouldn’t say a high fever necessarily constitutes as ‘good’.
war machine: But it’s fine.
war machine: I’m already on my way.
Peter Parker: WAIT NOW
war machine: Yep.
Peter Parker: MR COLONAL WAR MACHINE RHODES SIR
Peter Parker: YOU REALLY DONT HAVW TO
Peter Parker: IM FINE
Peter Parker: SRSLY
war machine: Don’t sweat it, kid. I had nothing to do today anyway.
Peter Parker: BUT NOW IM RUINING ITTT
war machine: Sitting in a cushy tower and stealing my best friend’s food while playing Candy Crush on my phone is definitely not ruining my day. I promise it’s okay.
Peter Parker: …
Peter Parker: sigh
Peter Parker: k
war machine: Great. I’m here.
Peter Parker: omw
~
James had very few days off, and yet he was willing to spend one hanging out with a sick teenager. Go figure.