Work Text:
"Hah, I won again!"
Kyle pumped his fist in the air in celebration as Stan groaned, dropping his controller onto his lap and reaching under his hat to scratch his scalp for what was probably the fifth time since he had gotten to Kyle's house. It was frankly concerning.
"Dude, why do you keep scratching your head so much?" Kyle asked.
Stan paused his aggressive scratching to look at him. "I dunno, it's just really itchy all the time for some reason."
Kyle raised an eyebrow. Judging by the pieces of dandruff floating from his hair, the reason was quite obvious to anyone that wasn't Stan.
"For 'some reason'?" Kyle asked with a blank tone, doing air quotes to accentuate his point. "When was the last time you washed your hair properly?"
Stan seemed to ponder for a short while. Kyle groaned loudly as he started to count with his fingers.
"Uh, like… two weeks?" he replied with a sheepish smile, shrinking under Kyle's disappointed stare.
"Alright, I can't look at this sorry sight any longer." Kyle sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. He grabbed Stan's hand and tugged him upstairs. "You're gonna wash your hair right now."
"At your house?! No!" Stan flushed, fighting against Kyle's grip. "That's embarrassing!"
"Dude, c'mon, it can't be more embarrassing than that greasy mop that you call hair!" Kyle chastised. "Do you want to start balding at 30?"
Stan grumbled. "Fine! If you're so smart, why don't you wash it?!"
Kyle froze, feeling his cheeks heat up. Him? Washing Stan's hair??
"What…?!" he squeaked.
"You heard me!" Stan's cheeks were pink with embarrassment, but he did not back down. "We'll play hairdresser. You're the hairdresser, I'm the client."
"Fine! If that's what it takes for you to wash your hair properly, then I'll do it!" Kyle huffed, trying to ignore the way his heart skipped a beat at the thought of it. Why was he so embarrassed at the idea of washing Stan's hair? That's dumb. He's dumb.
The two walked into the bathroom. Stan sat down on the toilet while Kyle opened the cabinet and started looking through the hair products. Most of the products there were specifically made for his and his mom's curly hair, but Kyle figured it couldn't be that bad for Stan, even if his hair wasn't curly. He got on his tiptoes to be able to reach the hair products properly, then started picking them up and holding them in his arms.
He heard a scratching sound from beside him and turned his head to see Stan once again scratching his scalp
"Stop. Scratching!" Kyle reprimanded once again.
"But it's itchy!" Stan whined.
"It won't be itchy for long." Kyle said, dropping the four bottles on top of the sink and presenting them to Stan. He watched as his best friend's eyes widened in surprise and slight interest.
"Whoa, dude!" he gaped. "What do you need all those for?!"
Kyle pointed at each bottle. "This one's shampoo, this is conditioner, I don't know what this one's called but it's like conditioner and ma tells me to put it on to make my hair prettier or something, and this is for after you wash your hair so it gets really soft and fluffy." he explained.
Stan blinked, staring at the bottles. "I just use 3-in-1, honestly." he admitted quietly, as if afraid Kyle would mock him.
Kyle shot him a deadpan look, fighting back a laugh. "Was that supposed to be surprising?" he asked, keeping his tone playful.
"Fuck off!" Stan punched his shoulder lightly, smiling. Kyle's stomach did a stupid little flip at that smile.
He shook off the feeling and began to think about how he was actually going to wash Stan's hair. It seemed there wasn't any way they were going to avoid completely soaking their clothes, so Kyle's plan was to get both of them some old clothes that they could wear instead of their usual school clothes.
He walked to his room and rummaged through his clothes, trying to find some that looked old enough. He settled with plain white t-shirts and gray shorts and walked back to the bathroom.
Kyle tossed the clothes to Stan. "Change into this so your school clothes don't get wet."
"Alright." Stan mumbled, and the two switched into the old clothes quickly. Because of how lanky he was compared to his best friend, Kyle's clothes were slightly baggy when Stan wore them. Seeing Stan wearing his clothes made Kyle's stomach do that weird flip again.
They climbed into the bathtub. Kyle sat on the bench-like structure of the tub and gestured for Stan to sit in front of him. Stan did as he asked, leaning on Kyle's legs as if they were the back of a chair. This whole time, he still had his hat on.
"Dude, take off your hat already." Kyle told him exasperatedly.
Stan seemed to be having doubts - or at least he was starting to get embarrassed - as he slowly pulled off his hat to reveal the mess of hair underneath. It was clumpy and visibly oily, and Kyle had to make a physical effort not to grimace at it.
"Jeez, dude." Kyle chuckled quietly. "How do you let it get this bad?"
Stan hid his face. "Shut up." he grumbled, sounding flustered.
"Alright," Kyle cleared his throat, preparing his best hairdresser voice. "what'll it be today?"
Stan giggled a little at his exaggerated voice. His heart skipped a beat at the sound. Kyle pretended he didn't know those feelings were due to his hopeless crush on his best friend. It was embarrassing to think about.
"I'm just here to wash, thank you." Stan replied in a shrill, feminine voice.
Kyle giggled, muffling his giggles with one of his hands. "Dude, why are you a woman?"
"I don't know." his best friend admitted bashfully, also giggling. "It was the first thing that came to mind."
The two laughed quietly at the absurdity of the situation. Every time Stan shuddered with the effort of keeping his laughs under control, he'd brush over Kyle's legs, and every time that happened Kyle's heart would stutter as if synced up with his best friend's laughs. Kyle hated how much of an effect Stan's reactions had on him. Thank God for his best friend's denseness, or else he surely would have noticed.
Kyle put on his hairdresser voice again. "Okay, let me just get the water ready!"
He turned on the tap and waited for the water to get warm. Stan yelped with surprise when a bit of the still cold water splashed onto his leg.
Kyle snickered at Stan's dramatic reaction. "Baby."
Instead of replying, Stan merely rolled his eyes at him.
Once the water had finally warmed up, Kyle moved it over to Stan, who let the water run over his fingers.
"Is the temperature to your liking, ma'am?" Kyle joked in his hairdresser voice.
"Yes, it's quite alright." Stan replied in the high pitched voice, fighting back a laugh.
Kyle brought the shower head up to Stan's head and began washing his hair, splitting it with his fingers to rinse it all properly. He could almost swear he felt Stan leaning into his touch ever so slightly when he did. Was he just imagining that?
When Stan's hair was thoroughly rinsed, Kyle squeezed some shampoo onto it and started massaging it into his scalp in a circular motion. This time, Stan was definitely leaning into his touch. Kyle could feel Stan's back pressing harder against his legs.
"That feels nice…" he mumbled in his normal voice.
"I-it does…?" Kyle stammered, feeling his face heat up.
Stan seemed to snap out of some trance when Kyle responded. "D-did I say that out loud??" he asked, burying his face in his hands. "God dammit…!"
Kyle tugged Stan's head back towards him slightly to apply shampoo in the area behind his ears. "Dude, it's fine. I'm your best friend, I'm not gonna judge you."
"Y-you don't think it's weird?" Stan stuttered, sounding embarrassed.
"Why would it be weird?" Kyle asked, genuinely confused. "Now tilt your head up while I rinse the shampoo off."
Stan did as he was told, and Kyle quickly rinsed the shampoo off before applying another layer of shampoo.
"Shampoo? Again?" Stan groaned.
"Yes, Stanley, you have to apply shampoo twice, you animal." Kyle replied mockingly.
Stan groaned in annoyance, but that didn't stop him from continuing to lean into Kyle's touch as he spread the shampoo across his scalp. Unable to not indulge himself, Kyle began to run his fingers through his best friend's hair, watching as he completely relaxed under him and practically laid his head down on his lap, his eyes closed and the corners of his mouth curved ever so slightly upwards. Kyle couldn't fight the smile that crept onto his face. He looked so pretty. God, it was truly embarrassing how much Kyle liked him.
Stan hummed softly, so quiet that Kyle barely heard him. The hum was like an arrow that shot straight through Kyle's rapidly beating heart, making his cheeks heat up. Kyle quickly stopped touching his friend's hair like a weirdo and went back to washing it like less of a weirdo.
Stan opened his eyes to look up at him. "Are you done?" he asked. His tone was not one of annoyance, but instead… almost disappointment? Maybe Kyle was reading too much into it. Yeah, he probably was.
"Mhm." Kyle hummed. "Gonna rinse it again now." he added awkwardly.
Stan tilted his head up again and Kyle washed the shampoo out of his hair. It already looked miles better than when they started, and though it still clung to his head, this time it was because of being drenched in water and not because of how absolutely disgusting it was. Kyle began squeezing the water out of Stan's hair.
"Ow!" Stan yelped, jerking away. "What was that for?"
"I have to squeeze some water out or else it won't have as much of an effect." Kyle explained matter-of-factly. "Mom said so."
"Alright, alright, just don't tug so hard!" Stan conceded, sighing.
After squeezing most of the water out a bit more carefully, Kyle poured some of the conditioner on his hands, spreading it over Stan's hair.
"Kyle?" Stan asked quietly.
"Yeah?"
"Um…" Stan was fidgeting with his completely soaked t-shirt now. "Can you do what you were doing before again…?"
Kyle's heart stammered in his chest, suddenly finding it hard to breathe. Why did the way he said that make him feel so flustered?
"U-um." Kyle was barely able to force the words out. "O-okay."
Kyle brought his hands up to his best friend's hair, and once again Stan was leaning into his touch like a puppy, relaxing under him as he spread the conditioner.
"Can I let you in on a secret?" Stan asked suddenly.
"Go ahead." Kyle replied, blushing at how absolutely adorable he looked.
"…I've only ever asked Wendy and my mom to do this to me." Stan admitted, sounding embarrassed. "I considered, um… asking you before, but I thought you'd make fun of me."
"What?" Although he was flustered that Stan had considered asking him to run his fingers through his hair before, Kyle was more confused than anything. "Why?"
Stan shrugged. "I dunno. 'Cause you're not a girl, I guess."
"I happen to be your best friend, dumbass." Kyle huffed softly.
"Super best friend." Stan corrected.
"Even better!" Kyle laughed under his breath. "Of course I wouldn't make fun of you for this. You've told me much more embarrassing stuff."
"Well, yeah, but you did make fun of me for those." Stan reminded him with a playful smirk.
"That's because those were actually embarrassing!" Kyle laughed. "There's nothing embarrassing about liking it when people touch your hair!"
Stan's face suddenly turned a deep crimson, making Kyle's chest tighten. "D-don't say it like that!"
Kyle laughed. "I'm just saying it like it is, dude! You liiiiiiike when people touch your hair!" he mocked playfully as he scratched Stan's head softly, smirking when his point was proven and Stan stretched his neck to get his head closer to Kyle's hands.
Stan groaned in embarrassment, his face beet red. "Stooooooooop." he mumbled, making Kyle laugh harder.
"Alright, I think the conditioner has been allowed to sit long enough." Kyle reached for the shower head and started rinsing Stan's hair.
"You're supposed to let the conditioner sit?" Stan sounded a bit bewildered.
Kyle sighed loudly, yet there was a wide, stupid smile on his face. "You're hopeless."
Nothing much happened while Kyle applied the final conditioner-like mixture. The two waited for it to take effect, making jokes amongst each other, then rinsed it off and squeezed the excess water out. It wasn't until they got up to get out of the tub that they finally noticed how completely soaked their clothes were.
"I… might have not thought this through all that much." Kyle admitted sheepishly as he wrung out his shorts.
"At least our school clothes are dry." Stan said, wringing his t-shirt out to get rid of as much water as possible.
Once their clothes were dry-ish, the two got out of the tub and Kyle started spraying the contents of the final bottle on Stan's hair.
"About time." Stan sighed. "I feel like I've been in there for ages."
Kyle rolled his eyes. "Stop being so dramatic." he said. "I do this whole ordeal at least once every week."
"No wonder your hair always looks so nice." Stan mused.
Kyle's heart leapt to his throat. It wasn't the first time Stan had complimented his hair, far from it, but every time he heard a compliment from Stan it made him lose his cool.
Begging for a distraction, Kyle quickly busied himself with finding the hairdryer, rummaging through the cabinet for it. Once he found it, he connected it to an outlet and turned it on to dry Stan's hair (and their soaked clothes, while he's at it).
Kyle took this opportunity to once again touch Stan's hair. As it dried, it became softer and softer to the touch, the hair products having done wonders for it. It also seemed to be turning… slightly wavy? Kyle concluded it must be because he used curly hair products.
Once it was finally fully dry, Kyle turned off the hairdryer and allowed Stan to take a proper look at his hair in the mirror.
"Are you satisfied, ma'am?" Kyle put on his silly fake voice again, awaiting Stan's reply.
Stan was still staring in awe at the mirror, fluffing up his hair and running his fingers through it.
"Wow…" he whispered, his eyes shining. "It feels so nice."
"It looks nice." Kyle couldn't stop the compliment from leaving his lips. "Really nice."
Stan turned to him, a goofy grin slowly rising onto his face. Then, out of nowhere, he crashed onto him, wrapping his arms around him in a tight hug.
"Thanks, Kyle." he murmured sweetly, his voice right next to Kyle's ear. Kyle didn't know if it was the way he said his name or the way his voice was so close to his ear, but his heart was beating uncontrollably in his chest, almost threatening to break through.
Kyle finally managed to snap out of his crush-induced trance and hug his best friend back. "Anytime." he choked out.
When Stan let go, Kyle felt a sudden burst of courage.
"So what's my payment?" he asked in his hairdresser voice.
"It was that hug, of course." Stan replied in his shrill voice, fighting back a smile.
"What about the tip?" Kyle prompted, more as a joke than anything.
Stan stared at Kyle, his expression unreadable. Kyle was about to say something when Stan leaned in, placed his hand on Kyle's shoulder, and gave him a small kiss on the cheek, so quick that Kyle was almost not sure it even happened.
Kyle froze completely, staring at Stan with his mouth hanging open in surprise. Stan was averting his eyes, and his face had gotten so red that the color had spread to his ears. Kyle was sure he looked like that too.
"There's your tip." Stan mumbled extremely quietly.
Kyle opened his mouth to say something, but then-
"Stanley, your mother is here to get you!" Kyle's mom yelled from downstairs, making both boys jump.
"Coming!" Stan replied, voice slightly wavering.
Stan quickly changed into his clothes and the two rushed down the stairs, avoiding each other's gaze. Kyle watched as his best friend walked off with his mother, waving goodbye absently.
He was still frozen with the embarrassing realization that he really, really wished Stan had kissed him on the lips instead.
[…]
Stan dialed Wendy's number as soon as he got home. He had to talk to her about what had just happened. He had to.
Thankfully, Wendy was always available in any time that wasn't the few weeks before a test, so she picked up almost instantly.
"Hi, sweetheart!" she greeted him happily. He could hear the squeak that her bed made as she dropped onto it. "What's up?"
"Hi, Wendy." Stan's voice was still shaky. Naturally, Wendy immediately took notice.
"What's wrong?" she asked, concern evident in her voice. "Did something happen?"
"Yes, actually." it was almost difficult to force the words out. He had never been good at talking about his feelings with his girlfriend, but he had promised her he would make an effort. He felt ashamed of what he had done, though his heart was still thumping in his chest from the adrenaline rush it had given him.
"Tell me about it." Wendy prompted sweetly.
"Something happened when I hung out with Kyle today."
"What was it?"
"Well… he washed my hair." Stan swallowed dryly as he prepared himself to continue.
"Oh?" Wendy sounded intrigued.
"And… um… I-kissed-him-on-the-cheek-as-thanks-and-I-kinda-really-liked-it-and-" he quickly said before Wendy interrupted him.
"Whoa, whoa, slow down a little!" Wendy sounded like she was about to laugh. Stan frowned. What was so funny? He had just cheated on her! Hadn't he?
"Why are you laughing?" Stan asked, upset.
"Let me get this straight." Wendy giggled a little. "You kissed Kyle on the cheek?"
"Yes." he admitted guiltily. "I'm so sorry."
"What are you sorry for?" Wendy sounded confused. "I kiss my girlfriends on the cheek all the time. It's not a big deal."
"But I'm cheating on you, aren't I?" Stan mumbled sadly. "Shouldn't you be, I don't know, mad?"
"Simply kissing your best friend on the cheek isn't cheating!" Wendy laughed. "At least I don't see it as cheating."
"But…" Stan paused. Should he really continue?
'I have to tell her.' he told himself. 'She has the right to know, and I promised I'd be more open with her.'
"What if…" he began, fidgeting with his jacket. "I kind of liked him…?"
"…Oh." Wendy sounded a little hurt. "That's- that's fine, of course. I always figured you were a little-"
"W-Wendy, wait!" Stan quickly interrupted her before she could misunderstand him. "But I still like you too! I… think I like both you and Kyle? But that's weird, right?"
"So you still like me?" she asked quietly, sounding relieved.
"Yeah, of course!" Stan nodded fervently, even though he knew Wendy couldn't see him. "But I think I like Kyle too and now I don't know what to do."
"Well, can't you just… confess to him and start dating him too?" Wendy suggested as if it was the most obvious solution in the whole world.
"Is that allowed?" Stan asked, genuinely unsure. He didn't know any adults who had more than one spouse.
"Why wouldn't it be?" Wendy refuted. "It makes sense to me. You like more than one person, you date both of them. As long as they know you have more than one partner and they're okay with it, I don't see the problem."
"…You do have a point." Stan conceded.
Wendy chuckled. "Don't I always?" she joked. "Well anyways, what are you waiting for? Go tell Kyle you like him!"
"I can't just do that!" Stan yelped, outraged. "What if he rejects me?! I don't know if I can take it!"
Wendy paused for several seconds. "…I have a feeling he won't reject you." her tone sounded completely certain.
"How do you know?" Stan grumbled.
"Call it a woman's intuition." he could hear the smirk in her tone. "Well, glad that's settled. Anything else you want to talk about? Because I have something I want to talk about. I've got major tea right now."
Stan smiled at her barely contained enthusiasm. "Talk away, Wends."
Wendy immediately launched into her story excitedly - something about how Clyde forgot his and Bebe's dating monthiversary? - and Stan allowed himself to doze off to the sound of her voice.