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"i don't know how to tell you this, dude, but it's not normal for you to be drinking a gallon of milk in one day."
"i'm not!" tweek insisted. "it's just half a gallon."
"yeah, but you drank the other half this morning," craig said, pointing at the half-empty jug tweek was pulling out of his fridge.
tweek scowled at his boyfriend "listen, man, if you're gonna come into my house and make fun of my drink of choice, i'm gonna kick you out."
"no you're not."
"no i'm not." he gave a resigned sigh. "i'm still drinking it, though." he shut the fridge door and moved to the dinner table, gesturing for craig to follow suit. they sat down in a comfortable silence, tweek pouring the remaining milk into a tall glass and watched craig scroll through nasa’s twitter page. he turned away and chugged the entire glass of milk, turning back to see his boyfriend staring at him with an uncharacteristically expressive look of horror on his face. tweek choked on the milk in surprise and did a spit-take of sorts, spraying it all over the table.
“dude!”
tweek coughed a few times and gave craig a thumbs-ups.