Chapter Text
He had been in familiar territory for nearly a month, passing through roads and settlements he had left behind in the hope of finding peace and maybe something of himself along the way. He wasn’t sure if he had achieved either but something had told him to wander further would be futile and so he had turned around and gone back the way he had come.
He had questioned the decision with each step, especially when he had begun to hear the whispers in the wine houses he would take lodgings in when he had the money to allow it. Even wearing Mo Xuanyu’s face and with the world knowing at least some of the truth of what had really occurred in the time when his name was used as a warning to all, he was still feared, still distrusted, still a story to frighten children to their beds. He had kept on though, through the rains of early Spring, until whatever was pulling him back became all the clearer.
Home.
Home; it had been a nebulous, transient thing for most of his life. He was certain he had had a loving home in his childhood but he could recall little of it, save for the feelings of love and safety that were all that remained of his parents. Lotus Pier had been a home, a place to grow, and there were times when he had loved it as dearly as he loved those he was raised with. He had always been something other though, not part of those he called shidi or shimei but neither was he part of the family that had taken him in regardless of how his beloved Shijie had tried to make him feel welcome.
When hate and fire had consumed that home, when necessity had torn out the most necessary part of him to save Jiang Cheng’s life, when he had found himself thrown into the mouth of hell only to claw his way out again with himself and the world so vastly changed, he had thought home would be a word he could never truly utter again. He was not the same. He could never be the same and so he could not settle, knowing that he could never trust that the secret he carried would not destroy everything around him.
He had not intended to be a hero. He had intended to be quiet, to do what was necessary to support those he was bound to but he had seen injustice, had seen innocent lives being taken for no reason other than the name they bore and he knew his heart would never rest easy until he acted.
The Burial Mounds had been a home. It was a place that somehow felt loved despite the horrors it contained. It was as flimsy as a butterfly's wing though and, all too soon, it had been destroyed with all those who had brought the love to it along with it.
Death had been a welcome escape.
He had not expected to find a home when blood and pain and the death of a young man he would carry with him for the rest of his life brought him back to the world but it seemed it had been waiting for him far longer than he expected. Home, however, was no longer a place but a person, a person who reached out within moments, took his hands and promised, as solemnly as only he could, that Wei Wuxian would not be allowed to fall again.
Home was a song written for him. A person dressed in white. A promise kept long since they had sent a lantern into the sky as mere boys with a vow to only do good in the world.
It was to that home that he had turned, weary feet and a wearier mind, keeping moving even as the words around him grew more hostile, hoping that he would find welcome at the end of it.
The day had been on his side as he traversed the mountain roads that had once taken him away from Gusu, the land lush and green around him and a little too tempting for Little Apple as she paused every other step to nibble on the fresh shoots of grass. He anticipated he was a day out from the Cloud Recesses at their current pace but the night promised to be clear, if a little chilly, and so a night sleeping beneath the stars would not be the worst he had ever endured.
As the sun began to wane, he slowed their pace even further to enjoy the view, pulling Chenqing from his belt and raising it to his lips, letting the music that had been written for him alone fly free on the breeze.
'Wei Ying.'
The voice was one he had heard in his head so many times in his journey, pulling old conversations to him to comfort him when the world felt too lonely, and it took him a moment to realise it had truly been spoken rather than just a fond memory. He turned, the figure behind him waiting patiently and poised as he always was but a small smile, anyone who did not know him would fail to see, softened his beloved face.
Wei Wuxian's own smile blossomed in return, certain he had not smiled in quite the same way since he had last laid eyes upon his friend.
'Lan Zhan,' he said, voice catching on the joy that came with speaking it aloud, 'You're here. How are you here?'
He expected an excuse.
Night Hunt. Passing through
'I was in Caiyi several days ago and heard some merchants saying they had shared the same lodgings as the famed Yiling Laozu and that he was on the road to Gusu,' said Lan Wangji, 'I anticipated you would return this way as I know you prefer paths that are less populated and decided to come and meet you.'
Tears sprang to his eyes even as his smile brightened at the words. 'Lan Zhan, only you would do such a thing and we’re so far from the Cloud Recesses,' he said, eyes finally taking in the ornate robes, every inch the Chief Cultivator the world had asked him to become, 'At the rate Little Apple goes, we will be sleeping under a tree tonight and you are hardly dressed for such a night.'
'There is a smallholding not far from here. A farming family,' said Lan Wangji, 'I have made arrangements with them to care for Little Apple for a few days so that she may rest. I will send someone out to bring her to the Cloud Recesses shortly. You and I can return by sword, if you wish to.'
'I don't want to put you to any trouble,' said Wei Wuxian, the words leaving him unbidden.
Lan Wangji's small smile changed to something more akin to soft exasperation, 'Does my presence here not suggest that it is no trouble at all?' he said, 'Wei Ying's comfort is never trouble. If we move on now, we will be in the Cloud Recesses before the curfew and I can arrange for some food to be brought.'
'Will Lan-Xiansheng…'
'Shufu is aware that I had planned to meet you and bring you back,' said Lan Wangji, 'He offered no protest.'
Wei Wuxian smiled, something warm that he had not felt since he had left all the months before settling in his chest, 'Well then,' he said, 'I would not be so rude as to refuse the invitation of Lan-Xiandu. I will admit though, that the promise of a meal and a warm bed would sway me anywhere right now.'
He saw the small frown crease Lan Wangji's brow but whatever thought plagued him seemed to flee as soon as it came and he instead stepped back with a sweeping gesture to the road behind him.
'Let's go home.'
They were not far down the path when their unexpected reunion became a distant thing in Wei Wuxian's mind and he found himself regaling his travelling companion with the stories of his adventures. Lan Wangji, attentive as ever to his friend's ramblings, offered only a few words here and there, to clarify a point of the story or to assure himself that Wei Wuxian was unhurt by his adventure. It was a gentle reminder of their shared past, of days spent side by side on the road, and it helped to remove the trappings of Chief versus rogue cultivator that they wore, leaving them both simply Lan Zhan and Wei Ying once more.
Little Apple plodded heavily beside them, slowing their pace to little more than a stroll but Lan Wangji seemed to have no wish to hurry them even as the light began to wane, the countryside around them painted red and gold as though the land itself had caught ablaze.
The smallholding Lan Wangji led them to was humble but well kept, the owners equally so, and Wei Wuxian felt no hesitation in leaving Little Apple in their care for a few days.
His pack of belongings felt too small as he pulled it onto his shoulder, realising with a sudden horror that the only other set of suitable clothes he had with him were in dire need of a wash after the rain storm had come upon him without the hope of shelter. He kept the worry from his face though, knowing he had appeared in the Cloud Recesses in far worse states than he presented in that moment. Lan Wangji did not seem to notice the hesitation, instead bowing neatly to Little Apple’s new guardians and handing over a small purse before he led Wei Wuxian back to the road.
'I hope she doesn't give them too much trouble,' he said as the gate closed behind them.
'I have advised them of her temperament and how it is best managed,' said Lan Wangji, 'She will be well tended. Come, we can fly now unless you wish to walk a little further whilst we have the light.'
'I wouldn't want to delay us returning any later than we should,' said Wei Wuxian, 'and I've been walking for several days straight.'
He had grown used to Lan Wangji's grip around his waist as he stood before him on Bichen, his minimal abilities with Mo Xuanyu's core meaning they had often resorted to travelling together when the need arose. After months without a single person touching him though, it felt odd but not unwelcome, Wei Wuxian doing his best not to lean back into the warmth behind him as they rose into the air.
Whilst their walk had been for Wei Wuxian's stories, their flight turned to Lan Wangji's as Wei Wuxian peppered him with questions of those he had left behind. Though Lan Wangji's answers were concise, it warmed Wei Wuxian that not only had his friend kept an eye on those he knew well but also ensured he kept account of those he would not otherwise associate with were it not for Wei Wuxian.
The Cloud Recesses was quiet as they reached the gate, Lan Wangji making short work of the warding before they stepped inside. As it shimmered back into existence behind them, Wei Wuxian felt the tension leave him at the thought of the safety it promised, too many nights on the road spent with sleep only light for fear of someone coming to end the life of the feared Yiling Laozu. He did not miss the irony of the thought that the Cloud Recesses was a place of safety when he had once believed it to be a prison. As his eyes strayed to his companion, he realised that it had always been a place of safety so long as he was with Lan Wangji.
'Should I go and greet Lan-Xiansheng?' said Wei Wuxian, as they turned from the familiar public paths to those that led towards Lan Wangji's home.
'In the morning,' said Lan Wangji, 'The hour is late and you have had a long journey. I already advised the others that your stay would officially commence from tomorrow.'
'Ah Lan Zhan,' whined Wei Wuxian, elbowing him gently in the ribs, 'Do not tell me I will need to be at my best for five in the morning?'
'Your stay will commence from the afternoon,' said Lan Wangji, 'I trust you will be at your best by then.'
'My best may be a struggle but at least I will be awake and unlikely to cause you as much embarrassment by that time of the day.'
'Wei Ying could never cause me embarrassment,' said Lan Wangji, 'Meeting with Shufu and the elders is custom alone. It will not affect your visit here. You are my guest and will remain so for as long as you wish to stay with us. I hope it will be for a long duration. I have missed your company, Wei Ying.'
'I've missed you too, Lan Zhan,' he replied, realising how deeply he meant the words as he spoke them and wishing he could further say just how often the man before him had crossed his thoughts during his journey.
The Cloud Recesses was silent around them and, for once, Wei Wuxian felt no need to fill the void it left with noise, instead content to listen to the sounds his usual chatter would drown out. He heard the rustle of the wind in the trees, the rhythm of his and Lan Wangji's footsteps as they fell into time with one another, the gentle swish of Lan Wangji's ornate robes and the occasional soft intake of breath that sounded like something akin to relief as they reached the gate to the Jingshi.
It had been a long time since he had anyone welcome him home, longer still he was sure since he knew he was welcome to be no one but himself as he stepped inside. Lan Wangji offered his home with a bow and a soft, small smile without asking for anything in return and Wei Wuxian allowed the sensation of safety to mist his eyes for a moment before he turned to his companion with a smile.
'Whenever I have struggled to find a place to sleep and made myself a bed beneath the stars instead, I dreamed I was back here.'
'This place will always be here for you,' said Lan Wangji, 'However and whenever you need it. The door will never be closed to you, I promise.'
'I know,' said Wei Wuxian, the surety of his words startling him a little as he spoke them, 'I will hold you to that though when I have driven you mad with my presence.'
Lan Wangji simply shook his head with a small smile, 'I will send for some food,' he said, pointing to a screen that hid one corner of the room, 'I had a bath prepared for you. It should still be hot but there are talismans to warm it again if not. They are the ones you designed so they last longer than others.'
'Water that is not likely to freeze off vital appendages will be most welcome, even slightly warm will be a luxury,' said Wei Wuxian with a laugh, 'Ah, Lan Zhan, I've grown so used to a simple life, I do not know how I will manage being in such a place as this. I will grow idle with the luxury of it all.'
'There is no harm in taking comfort where it is offered,' said Lan Wangji, 'You have had a long journey. I have set out some things for you to wear tonight but do not feel the need to use them if you would prefer your own.'
'Everything I have is in desperate need of a wash.'
'Then set it aside and I will have someone take it away for washing when they bring the food. I have had several sets made up for you in anticipation of your return. Anything else you need can be arranged.'
Wei Wuxian smiled, 'You didn't need to do all this.'
'I am aware,' said Lan Wangji, 'But I wanted to. I want you to have everything you need without having to ask for it. I won’t be a moment.'
Wei Wuxian headed behind the privacy screen as Lan Wangji returned to the main door, no doubt to make arrangements for the promised food that made Wei Wuxian's stomach twist a little in anticipation of a good meal, even the simple fare preferred by his friend’s sect an improvement on some of the meagre meals he had been able to afford on the road.
The bath before him was deep and still curling with steam, fragranced with something subtle but inviting he recognised all too well from Lan Wangji's own clothes and surroundings. He tried not to let his thoughts linger on being surrounded by the scent that had haunted his dreams for months.
Thoughts beyond the comforting heat permeating his bones were far from his mind though as he disrobed and slid into the water, certain he may well melt as the grime from the road was washed away. Were it not for the sound of Lan Wangji moving around the room beyond the screen, he knew sleep would have soon claimed him, safety in every breath he took of the fresh warm scent surrounding him.
'Do not fall asleep, Wei Ying.'
He smiled as he realised his friend’s thoughts were following his own. 'I am trying not to.'
'I will send for Shufu to fish you out if you do.'
Wei Wuxian laughed, 'Lan Zhan, you are too cruel. With a threat like that, I will be out shortly.'
'Your supper will not be long.'
Wei Wuxian ducked his head beneath the water, holding his breath as he scrubbed fingers through his hair to loosen the dirt that had gathered there. As his lungs began to protest in want of air, he surfaced, hearing Lan Wangji's voice and one he did not recognise speaking quietly.
'Please have them returned by tomorrow afternoon, make any necessary repairs.'
'Yes, Hanguang-Jun. Do you require anything else?'
'Not this evening. Please inform those on the watch that we are not to be disturbed unless it is an emergency.'
Wei Wuxian lifted himself from the bath as he heard the door slide closed, savoury smells that made his stomach grumble loudly overtaking the scent of the water.
'I have sent your clothes to be washed and mended,' said Lan Wangji as Wei Wuxian roughly dried himself before slipping into the clothes that had been left for him, the soft and bright white somewhat jarring after months of his darker clothes, 'Supper is here.'
Not wanting to make his friend wait, Wei Wuxian hurried to finish dressing, hair hanging wet around his shoulders as he stepped back around the screen to find a table set for him alone.
'You aren’t eating?'
Lan Wangji shook his head, 'I ate earlier and will not be able to sleep if I do so now,' he said, 'I have letters to attend to whilst you eat.'
Though it felt strange for the first few moments to eat alone whilst his friend sat nearby at his work, hunger and familiarity soon won out, comfortable in the space he knew well despite his absence. Though the food was not quite to his taste, he soon realised that it was more flavourful than the fare he had previously had, concessions in the cooking made for his palate over the preferred simplicity of the Lan Sect.
Once his hunger was sated, he had barely sat back when Lan Wangji got to his feet, opening a cupboard to the side of the room and drawing out two jars of Emperor’s Smile, the bright white bottles glinting in the candlelight.
'Hanguang-Jun spoils me,' said Wei Wuxian, opening one of the bottles as it was passed to him and taking a moment to breathe in the sharp fragrance.
'A little now and then will not harm,' said Lan Wangji, 'But please ensure its consumption is restricted to here or Caiyi. The young ones are impressionable and they look up to their Wei-Qianbei after Jingyi and Sizhui’s stories.'
Wei Wuxian chuckled, 'Ah those boys,' he said, 'I hope to see them.'
'Tomorrow,' said Lan Wangji, 'If they are behaving as they should, they are in their beds now.'
'And do you believe they are behaving?' said Wei Wuxian, seeing the small smile of amusement on Lan Wangji's face.
'I believe they are wise enough to not get caught if they have chosen not to be in their beds.'
Wei Wuxian laughed brightly, 'Lan Zhan! Lan Zhan! Who would have thought that serious, rule abiding boy I once knew would smile so fondly about his juniors breaking the rules?'
'Some lessons are hard learned,' said Lan Wangji, 'And my trust in them was hard won by their previous deeds.'
'They are brave young men,' said Wei Wuxian, 'Never did I once think…my A-Yuan. Lan Zhan, I will never be able to thank you for all you did.'
Lan Wangji shook his head, 'There is no need for thanks, not for that. Sizhui brought me hope in a time when I thought I would never know it again. To have both of you in my life now is reward and thanks enough,' he said, 'Let me comb out your hair for you, it will dry in knots otherwise.'
The change in the conversation was sudden but Wei Wuxian did not challenge it, instead nodding and sitting up a little straighter as Lan Wangji retrieved a comb and came to kneel behind him.
The pass of the comb through his hair was gentle and rhythmic, the conversation light and focused on Wei Wuxian's travels, Lan Wangji keen to learn of the places he had been that were beyond the boundaries of the lands he knew. Wei Wuxian was happy to weave tales, some with an embellishment or two that prompted a huff of laughter from his companion, each of them allowing them a moment to share the path Wei Wuxian had walked alone for so long.
Fingers soon replaced the comb, smoothing it neatly down Wei Wuxian's back before Lan Wangji got to his feet and returned to his seat where Wei Wuxian could see him. With deft fingers, Lan Wangji took the heavy ornaments from his own hair, setting them neatly on the table before him, until it tumbled loose save for the small section that was wrapped by the tails of his ribbon. It was a familiar intimacy, one they had shared in what had felt like the few short weeks of something akin to normality when they had rested and recovered after the truth of Jin Guangyao had been revealed. It was one of the memories that had often threatened to turn Wei Wuxian's feet prematurely for home, wanting to know again the sheer safety and comfort that had been alien in all places other than Lan Wangji’s home.
'I will have to find something to do whilst I'm here, Lan Zhan,' said Wei Wuxian as the silence grew a little too long, 'You know I am terrible when I am bored.'
'Is there anything you plan to do?' said Lan Wangji, 'You are welcome here for as long as you like but there is no obligation for you to stay long if you have other business to attend to.'
'Business?' said Wei Wuxian with a smile, 'Ah, Lan Zhan, you make me sound far more important than I am. I have no plans as such. I know I will have to find something to fill my purse a little. I took on some cultivator work now and then when I was on the road but it didn’t pay all that well. It will be harder here I think, with my reputation, but I hope there will be some who will be willing to offer me work. I am not interested in getting involved in anything too complex though. If I have my way I will make enough money to buy myself a small piece of land and enough materials to build myself a house and live quite contentedly there for the rest of my days. I was never the most successful of farmers but I think I could make a go of it so long as my illustrious friend would condescend to visit me now and then.'
'I will visit as often as you permit me,' said Lan Wangji, 'For I have been forced to miss your company far too much over far too many years and I find even half an hour of conversation with you has the power to ease days of what I am subjected to by the other sects on a daily basis.'
Though his tone was jovial, Wei Wuxian could not help but hear the bitter truth beneath his words.
'My poor Lan Zhan,' he said, 'Perhaps, whilst I am here, I can stand behind you in a few of your meetings and scare them into behaving better.'
Lan Wangji smiled. 'You could certainly try,' he said, 'there are a few I think you could terrify even now.'
Wei Wuxian picked up his cup with a grin. 'I'm glad to have my uses,' he said, raising it to his lips and frowning as he realised it was empty.
Lan Wangji reached for the bottle and poured a fresh cup before handing it to Wei Wuxian. The cup was barely at Wei Wuxian's lips when another was poured but rather than being placed before him, he watched his friend finish it in one pull.
'Lan Zhan! Don't!' he cried, even though he knew it was too late to be of use, 'How am I meant to make a good impression on Lan-Xiansheng if I'm having to chase you all over the Cloud Recesses to keep you out of mischief. He will say I have led you astray.'
'Do not worry,' said Lan Wangji, his voice far steadier than Wei Wuxian expected it to be, his eyes clear as he offered him a small smile, 'Whilst most of my endeavours have been what you would have expected in your absence, I have also worked to ensure I may take a cup of wine without the previous complications. Your preferred beverage gave me the chance to bring you closer despite the distance between us.'
Wei Wuxian smiled at the words but it quickly turned to a frown at the thought of what his friend would have put himself through to make it possible to even take one cup.
'But why?' he asked, taking a sip from his own cup, the contents fragrant but potent as it slid with a familiar burn down his throat.
A frown pinched Lan Wangji's eyebrows before he sighed. 'There was pressure enough before to drink in the presence of others,' he said, 'But I could easily refuse without offending too greatly. It has proved harder with my new position. If Xiongzhang was present, I could perhaps rely upon him to deflect, but he remains in his seclusion. Shufu does what he can whenever he is present but he does not venture to all places I am required to attend. There are only a few sect leaders who cater to the fact that I do not drink but others…I feared that I would one day find my cup filled with alcohol despite assurances that it was not and, well…'
The cup in Wei Wuxian's hand was in danger of shattering in his grip before he quickly set it down, pressing his knuckles against his thigh as he stopped himself from cursing half the people he felt unfortunate enough to know.
'You should have come with me when I left.'
'I have thought that several times a day since we parted,' said Lan Wangji, 'But I made my choice for what I thought would be the good of the world and, as such, have not left myself any room to be selfish.'
'Lan Zhan,' said Wei Wuxian, covering his hand with his own, 'You are too good.'
Lan Wangji shook his head, 'Not always,' he said before he let a louder breath escape him, 'But I did not mean to allow the conversation to move this way. Our reunion should be a happy one and I do not mean to burden you with my worries.'
Wei Wuxian frowned, 'Lan Zhan, I did not come here to just be entertained. If you have worries to share then share them. I may not be able to help but I can try.'
Lan Wangji's hand turned beneath his, pressing them palm to palm. 'Just you being here is a great help,' he said, 'And, I will share some of my troubles, if only to have someone to tell, but not tonight. Tonight should be a happy occasion to welcome you home. I want to hear more about your journey.'
He heard the plea in the words, the wish to deflect from the troubles he was certain Lan Wangji would share when he was ready. For the moment though, he was happy to indulge the request for happier stories, wanting nothing more to bring back the small, indulgent smile to Lan Wangji's lips as he embellished even the simplest tale for greater effect.
With the trajectory of the conversation changed, they talked long into the night until both were too weary to form sentences of any value, finally retreating to their beds many hours after the curfew bell had sounded.
When Wei Ying woke, he found himself alone but evidence of Lan Wangji's presence remained, not just in the usual familiarity of his home but in the gentle, thoughtful courtesy in how he had left the room.
The windows were shuttered against the cool light of the day, leaving Wei Wuxian enough light to see by but not enough to disturb him as he rested. The room was still warm, an extra blanket tucked around him that had not been there when he had fallen asleep chasing away any chill. A neat stack of new robes sat at the end of the bed, all in his preferred colours, with a small coin purse set atop them alongside a jade token that would allow him to pass all barriers in the Cloud Recesses unhindered.
He caught the savoury smell of food, eyes adjusting enough to make out the covered dishes on the table, warming charms set on all of them. His stomach grumbled noisily and he pulled himself from his cocoon of blankets only to snag one to wrap around him as he made his way to the table. The food was forgotten however as he noticed the note in his friend’s elegant hand, the words bringing a smile to his lips despite the writer’s absence.
I will be teaching the juniors until mid afternoon. You are welcome to come and join us if you would like. If you have other tasks you wish to attend to though, I will see you when I am finished. This is your home for however long you need it to be and you may come and go as you please. If there is anything you need, ask and it will be provided. Do not wander too far if you go out, Shufu is still expecting you later today.
The final words almost carried the dry, serious tone that Wei Wuxian was certain he was the only one capable of hearing the humour in when Lan Wangji used it. He laughed, reading the note over several times before folding it neatly and setting it aside.
Home finally felt as though it had a foundation.