Work Text:
When Kaeya first arrived at the Ragnvindr Manor, he was taken in by two loving redheads, a father, and his son.
Crepus Ragnvindr, who found him on that rainy night and took him in, taking pity on his child self.
And Diluc Ragnvindr, his adoptive brother who fussed over him the moment Kaeya stepped into that home.
He was a blue-haired misfit in that household of redheads. An outsider trying his best to fit in with his new family.
He always felt as if he didn’t belong, even though Master Crepus adored him just as their own son, Kaeya felt left out.
He wasn’t like them. He wasn’t a fair-skinned kid, nor did he have fiery red hair, like his brother or father.
No. He was different, in so many ways, he never felt normal in their home, but they were too happy to make an exception. They treated him like an extension of themselves already; they loved him unconditionally, with open arms and gentle smiles on their faces.
And it made him feel warm inside. Like all the hardships that he had gone through in his life melted away when they smiled. As if they understood what he needed and what he was going through; as if he was part of their family.
He felt loved, he truly did.
To make him feel more at home, his brother Diluc decided he'd grow his hair long as well, and that was how their bond came to be.
Forged through by just a simple gesture of making someone feel at home, Kaeya and Diluc became inseparable. For a while, Kaeya forgot about the past few months, forgot about being a freak, and forgot about the fear of being alone again.
Forgotten, for just a little while.
He learned how it was, to be loved, to be accepted, and to be cherished. He loved his new family with all his heart, and although he'd always be a dark spot in their family of fairs, Kaeya was now a Ragnvindr, and there was nothing else that could make him happier.
So yes, Kaeya grew up in Ragnvindr Manor, in a family of loving redheads, he stopped trying to fit in, because he stood out, and no one could change that.
Despite the black corrupted chains encircling his wrists that screamed "Traitor!" and "Spy!" at him, he felt them slip off whenever his brother smiled at him.
Maybe he could be free of the burdens laid on him, maybe he could find solitude, and just maybe his life would get better slowly.
He was no devotee to the gods who destroyed his nation, but he prayed, he prayed to them to let him have this, let him have this love, this family.
His family.
--
"You were never my brother!"
"My father gave you a home, and this is what you returned to him?!*
"You were and never will be a ragnvindr."
If Kaeya's family was gone, then there was no purpose in trying to stick himself in. His loving father was dead, and his older brother disowned him, tried to kill him, and left him all alone.
A blue-haired boy all alone to rot, to die, and to never be found again.
His hair mocked him, laughing at him. This was his last day at the manor, he was simply here to get his stuff and leave. Yet here he was, staring in the mirror, at his long blue hair. His eye was filled with a hateful gaze, directed at those locks of blue.
"I'll grow my hair out to match with you brother!"
No more brother. No more matching. No more long hair.
He gripped the knife in his hands, pressing it onto his fingers as the red liquid dripped down his hand. He lifted the knife up to his hair, at a certain length, and slashed.
There went his beautiful blue hair, falling onto the floor like a sea of blood. The blade glistened brightly against the cold light of the room.
He felt tears welling up in his eyes, and yet he refused to cry.
The blade was clean, and it looked sharp, almost painful but not.
His beautiful blue hair was gone, just like his happiness and will to live. he chopped them perfectly short, so he won't be a ragnvindr anymore. So Diluc's wish could be fulfilled.
The knife he used to slice his hair, dropped through the grip of his hands and onto the floor, the noise alerting Adelinde who rushed into the room.
She saw him standing in front of the mirror, his long beautiful blue hair chopped off, fallen around him in fragments.
"Young Master!" She yelled, grabbing him into a bone-crushing hug.
"Why would you do this Young Master, why would you cut your hair?"
Could he tell her, that he did it, so Diluc would be happy that Kaeya and him no longer had any matching traits of being siblings? How could he just tell her that?
So he didn't say anything as she cried into the hug, over him, over his long gone hair. He was done, now. It was over. His hair was now shorter, he was no longer a ragnvindr, and he no longer had any family.
He couldn't bear looking at himself in the mirror again. That beautiful blue hair of his, so full of life before, was all now dead.
It hurt him, it really hurt him. But it was the only thing he had. If he ever wanted to leave this place, if he ever needed help from someone, he had no choice but to look like a monster. No one would help him now. He couldn't ask for help from anyone.
"I'm sorry Addie, but, I'm not your young master anymore." He really tried to say those words devoid of any emotion, but his voice still broke off at the end.
And maybe Adelinde understood, as she grabbed him in her arms like all those years ago when he had been a baby and hugged him. Whispering soothing things into his ears.
"Ragvindr or not, you'll always be my little Kaeya." This was it. These words were those who broke the dam Kaeya had built as tears flooded down his face, he gripped her tightly as if she'd fade away if he let go, and cried. He sobbed into her shoulders, till nothing was left.
And finally, after a few minutes, Adelinde released him from her arms, wiping his face gently with her soft hands.
"Whatever your decision is, I'll support you through it."
That was the day Kaeya stopped being a ragnvindr, he was no longer Master Crepus's son, no longer Diluc Ragnvindr, he was simply Kaeya, a man with no family.
A man who would be completely alone, forever.