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Months of gentle, hidden touches. Stolen kisses between classes in empty stairwells, heads pressed to shoulders while they watched snap peas grow, an arm around a waist in the darkness of the movie theater, sleeping side by side in beds while nobody was home, hands intertwined underneath the dining table, just like right now.
Wylan was perpetually blushing in Jesper’s presence, even more so when he was able to hold his hand under the table during dinner. He wasn’t quite sure what Colm Fahey was thinking, maybe that Wylan had appeared out of thin air and was in his house at least two times a week.
He knew Jesper had been lectured about how polite and smart and studious Wylan was, apparently qualities Jesper lacked and Colm would like to see in him. There was an unspoken tension there, one that Wylan tried to soften by bragging about Jesper’s achievements if he didn’t get too shy to start the conversation.
Rather than a father punishing a child for not turning out how he’d wanted, like Wylan’s experience, this was a father seeing potential in his child and believing in him. It was tough being around Jesper and Colm sometimes, seeing that a father could be good and love his child.
Jesper’s hand tightened around Wylan’s as he swallowed down a mouthful of steamed vegetables, sometimes Wylan would eat Jesper’s brussel sprouts for him when Colm wasn’t looking. Jesper thought anybody who likes brussel sprouts should go to jail but not Wylan because clearly Wylan liked them in a sane way, a shining exception because Jesper liked him.
“Daddy, I gotta tell you something.” Jesper got to his feet quickly, pushing his seat back abruptly. Wylan flinched magnificently out of sheer surprise, staring up at Jesper who placed both hands on the table and looked at his father expectantly.
“What’d you do?” Colm leaned back in his chair, he knew what Jesper sounded like when he wanted something. Last time Jesper did something like this he was begging for headphones, convincing Colm because obviously he did not want to listen to his son’s loud blaring music at all hours of the day.
“I don’t want to keep it a secret anymore,” Jesper looked down at Wylan who was completely lost, but generally supportive. He extended his hand to Wylan and Wylan looked at him, then Colm, then Jesper again. His hand lightly settled in Jesper’s and Jesper made a show of tucking their fingers together. “We’re dating, Wylan’s my boyfriend and if you don’t want to accept us-”
“Jes, what the hell are you talking about? Are you asking me if I don’t like Wylan? I love Wy, he’s great.” Colm gestured towards Wylan, who sat up straighter and felt his ears get hot. Somehow the spotlight was on him when Jesper was making a commotion.
“No, I’m telling you that we’re dating, I date boys.” Jesper was going all in, like he usually did, and Wylan waited in silent agony for Colm to process his son’s relationship status and orientation all at once.
“I know you’re dating.” Colm looked between the two of them, who were not doing a very good job at hiding they were in love with each other. “You’re under my roof, I can see you holding hands at dinner and waking up together in your bed.”
“Well. Did you know I like boys?” Jesper kind of hated it when his father knew everything, but he did, he really embraced the single parent thing and worked his ass off to make sure he knew everything Jesper was going through so he could be there for him.
“Jes, I told you about the phone call I got from a very angry mother that you kissed her daughter and her son on the same weekend?” Colm gave a small apologetic smile to Wylan, who knew Jesper kissed people before him but not at this frequency.
“I totally forgot about that,” Jesper batted his eyes because he may or may not have been intoxicated for the very first time. “They meant nothing to me, baby, they both kissed me, by the way.” He softly leaned down towards Wylan and only looked away when Wylan gave him a little nod. “So…my coming out and my relationship reveal was for nothing?”
“Not for nothing, I’m really proud of you.” Colm, even if he found out Jesper was bisexual two years ago or right now, would be proud of his son. “And I’m really happy you and Wylan could share this with me. You did talk about this with Wy, right? He looks like a deer in headlights, bud.”
“W-we did talk about telling you, but um, not where or when or how,” Wylan cleared his throat because he wanted to reassure his boyfriend’s father that he was a good boyfriend, but Wylan got the sense he wasn’t doing a great job. “I mean it’s totally fine that Jes did tell you now, of course you were gonna be accepting.”
“So we didn’t make a plan but we agreed to tell you, eventually.” Jesper trailed off and sank down into his chair with a heavy thump, peeking over at Wylan apologetically and Wylan rested a reassuring hand on his thigh. “I was just getting sick of sneaking around.”
“You were doing a shit job.” Colm nodded his head and crossed his arms over his chest. He couldn’t count the amount of times he’d caught them cuddling on the couch or whispering in each other’s ears in the kitchen or kissing goodbye on the porch or hugging tightly in their sleep in his son’s bed. “But still, very proud and happy for the two of you.”
“I don’t mind that it was a surprise,” Wylan gave the both of them a small smile, it would have given him a crushing anxiety attack if he didn’t trust both Jesper and Colm completely. “It was kind of fun.”
“Thank you, father dearest.” Jesper was calm enough to go back to eating his dinner, scooping surprisingly still-warm lasagna into his mouth. “See? It’s fun, we’re having fun.” He offered his hand to Wylan so they could hold hands on the table and Wylan flushed bright red, quickly holding it.
“You know what else is fun? Safe sex.” Colm went into lecture mode and Jesper was absolutely horrified, the satisfaction of his father being proud of him faded into his father embarrassing him the way he always did. “I can skip the pregnancy speel but you’re still gonna have to be using protection, you’re using it, right?”
“Oh my God, stop, stop.” Jesper forced the last mouthful of pasta down and got up from his chair. “We’re going to my room.” Wylan stood up after him and his heart thudded in his chest, he’d actually like to learn more, curious and polite.
“Door open.” Colm chided because he’d let them get away with too much for the sake of pretending he didn’t know they were together. “And remember, the most important thing is consent and making sure you’re on the same page. Talk about it.”
“Christ on the cross.” Jesper hissed as he grabbed Wylan by the shoulders and softly ushered him to the staircase. “You’re being so weird and gross and weird, leave us alone.” He helped Wylan up the stairs as Wylan softly turned his head back towards Colm and offered a small little wave.
He thought what Colm was saying was worth hearing, but it was also amazing that Jesper was overheating and stomping around like his father had said something totally out of line. Wylan thought it was so sweet, thought Jesper was sweet, thought Colm was sweet and thought a son having a father he could really count on for everything was sweet.
“I’m so fucking sorry, baby, that was the worst thing to ever happen to me.” Jesper sighed dramatically as they pushed into his bedroom and he defiantly closed the door all the way before Wylan softly opened it an inch or two. “I’m never going to recover.” He threw himself back on his bed, resting his head on his pillow with a loud groan.
“It’s okay, I didn’t mind it.” Wylan sat down on the edge of Jesper’s bed timidly and tucked a stray curl behind his ear. “I think your dad was making some good points, it was worth listening to.”
“I really hate it when you, fuck no I don’t, I could never hate anything you do. I meant, what I meant was when my dad and you like aren’t fazed and I feel like I’m dying. You know I am so good at fucking up by talking too much when I could have just shut up.” Jesper brought his hands up to his face and rubbed at his eyes, shaking his head and huffing in frustration. “You did nothing wrong, I’m being a stupid jerk.”
Wylan waited silently and watched Jesper beat himself up for wording things wrong, as if Wylan wouldn’t be understanding and see the best in him. He got up on his knees and crawled over to where Jesper was lying. With careful hands he scooped Jesper’s head into his lap and gently touched where his cheeks were hot with humiliation.
“I know you don’t hate me, you don’t have to clarify.” Wylan whispered softly, leaning down and pressing a kiss between Jesper’s furrowed brows. “And I know what you meant, you just don’t like being the odd one out.” He smoothed his fingers over Jesper’s jaw until he stopped clenching his teeth and finally softened up.
“I don’t like it.” Jesper reached backward until his hands settled on Wylan’s waist and Wylan flushed pink the way he always did. “But I guess I’m happy you and Dad are getting along, even if he’s being annoying.”
“I think he’s cool.” Wylan laughed happily when Jesper pulled a face, extremely disturbed that Colm Fahey could be cool to anybody, especially his boyfriend.
“He’s so lame, beyond lame.” Jesper scoffed because he couldn’t think of a better insult, he tilted his head softly and hummed. “I think you gotta make it up to me.”
“Do I?” Wylan looked toward the door out of habit, and then let Jesper’s head fall back onto the pillow so he could climb right on top of him. “Boyfriend weighted blanket?” He asked as Jesper wrapped both arms around him tightly and sighed in relief.
“God, I love boyfriend weighted blanket, and I love boyfriend.” Jesper happily snuggled into Wylan, lying completely on top of him, both of them comfortable and relaxed.
“I love boyfriend too,” Wylan murmured into Jesper’s hair, softly wrapping his arms around his neck just in time for his boyfriend to start pressing small kisses to his jawline. “You know what else I love? Lasagna, and I kinda didn’t finish my dinner…”
“Oh my fucking God,” Jesper had been so caught up in his father talking about his sex life that he’d totally missed that Wylan was still enjoying his meal. “I’m the worst person ever, did you wanna get some more?”
“In like ten minutes we can go,” Wylan giggled because yes his meal was cut short but it was so unserious that he couldn’t try to be mad about it. “And remember your dad made dessert, he made strudel.”
“You know what, he got to you through your tummy.” Jesper grumbled, even though he was really pleased Wylan liked his father and was comfortable with him. After all Wylan went through, Jesper thought he deserved a father like Colm and was completely open to sharing the love. “Is that what I did? When I took you for ice cream?”
“Yeah, you guys feed me and I keep coming back, like a stray cat…” Wylan grinned when Jesper rolled them over, laying on top of Wylan with a lot less weight than Wylan could muster up and he gently kissed his cheek.
“Damn, I can’t even be mad at him cause I did the same thing. What’s the thing about the apple? Like apple like father?” Jesper said this against Wylan’s cheek because he’d gotten too comfortable at this point and really needed these ten minutes of snuggle time before getting out of bed again.
“Oh, the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree?” Wylan brushed some of Jesper’s hair away from his forehead and Jesper blinked slowly at him.
“Where the hell did I get any of what I just said?” Jesper was sort of in disbelief that he’d been so wrong even more in disbelief that Wylan looked so beautiful just lying there under him. “Whatever, cuddle time.”
“Can I have a kiss?” Wylan didn’t get to finish his sentence because Jesper was leaning down to press their lips together before the question was out. He felt his ears get hot and then softly buried himself in Jesper’s shirt. “Maybe I’ll eat in fifteen minutes.”
“I can’t believe I did that.” Jesper plopped down on his side and brought Wylan close to his chest, arms still wrapped around him. “Sorry to rub it in but I ate so well I could go for a nap.”
“You’re not sorry,” Wylan rolled his eyes playfully, grabbing the corner of the throw blanket and draping what bit of the fabric he could over Jesper. “Get some rest, I’ll escape for food later."
“You have to wake me up,” Jesper mumbled, it was completely his fault that he was full with a delicious meal and Wylan had only eaten half of it. “No escaping, we’re gonna go together.”
“Yeah? Gonna have second dinner?” Wylan wiggled Snuggles out from under Jesper’s head and set him down safely closer to the bed frame.
“I might.” Jesper was a teenage boy through and through, where he could eat seconds and thirds and still be the tallest, lankiest guy someone knew. “I’m a growing boy.”
“I’m not.” Wylan snorted, he felt like he’d been the same height forever, because he wanted a few more inches but wasn’t convinced it was going to happen.
“You’re a perfect boy, just the right size.” Jesper patted Wylan on the backside gently and Wylan laughed, he knew that was just an excuse to touch him.
“Thank you, I think you’re just right too.” Wylan kissed Jesper on the jaw because it was all he could reach and then snuggled back into place against his chest.
And everything did feel right, lying here on Jesper’s bed with the door ajar so his father could keep an eye on them. Wylan didn’t feel frightened or like he had to hide, he felt like he could do anything he wanted.
All he wanted to do was to hold and be held. He couldn’t think of anything more right, maybe Jesper and him, but other than that, being in each other’s arms was right, was meant to be.