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The heat from the bite felt blistering to Steve as he fought to keep composure. He knew… he knew what he had to do.
He had roughly 14 more hours before he would die.
Before he would become a monster.
Just 14 more hours
He couldn't tell them…
Fuck, he couldn't do that to them. They would end up being the ones to kill him and he never wanted to do that to them
He thought about Joyce - mom - and thought about how heartbroken she would be. How she'd scream and cry and beg Owens for a cure even though there wasn't one.
Hopper - dad - and how he could shut down, just like when he lost his real daughter, Sarah. Steve didn't want to think of the alcohol and drugs.
Fuck… Robin… his soulmate, the one person who made his life worth living time and time again. She'd be catatonic.
Steve fought back a sob.
He thought of Nancy and Jonathan and their rough start to what is now one of the best relationships he's ever had. Some would say it's weird to view your ex as a sibling but after everything? What could he think of them, his ex and her boyfriend, as?
Steve slipped into the rundown bathroom and locked the door. He could keep the quiet sobs at bay.
He thought of the kids and how devastated they would be. All his little siblings and how he wouldn't be there to protect them anymore.
He thought of how Jane would be devastated even though there was no cure, she was immune. She'd blame herself.
He thought of Eddie, the newest to the group. And his group of his uncle and three friends. They had hated each other but Eddie was so GOOD. Steve took a wheezing breath. The kids would be okay… they had everyone else to look after them.
He started with Joyce first. He had too.
"Hey, mom?" He peeked into the kitchen.
Joyce looked up from where she was purifying the water. "Yes, sweetheart?"
Steve moved to her and hugged her tight. "I'm going on patrol… but that last run-in spooked me. Promise you'll be safe will I'm out?"
Joyce immediately hugged him back and stood on her toes to kiss his temple. "We'll be safe. You just be careful, okay? Come home as soon as you can."
Steve forced his voice to stay steady. "Of course, mom."
Next was Hopper who was counting the ammunition.
"Hey, pops. I'm heading out for patrol."
Hopper looked up sharply, eying Steve. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing! Nothing… just that horde spooked me. Thought we'd lose some people…"
Hopper's eyes softened and he moved to Steve, hugging him close. "You kept us safe. You did good."
Steve let out a shaky sigh and melted into Hopper. "Be safe, kay?.."
"You too. Remember, it's your turn to entertain the brats."
Steve's heart cracked and he nodded and grinned. "Someone has to keep them in line…"
He found Dustin next and immediately pulled him into a hug. "You got fucking lucky today. You need to pay attention."
Dustin huffed but held onto Steve, burying himself into the hug. "I'm sorry."
"Just be careful, damnit. I won't always be there to protect you."
Dustin pulled back, frowning. "Of course you will." He looked confused.
"We won't always be on the same team." He gripped Dustin's shoulders. "Promise me. Promise me you'll look out better. I don't know what I would do if you ever… if you…" his voice cracked before he pulled Dustin close again. "I love you… don't do that again."
Dustin sniffled and hugged back just as tight. "I promise Steve."
"Okay… okay good. Practice your aim while I'm on patrol."
Dustin huffed and nodded as he pulled away. "Can you see if there's any good chocolate left?"
Steve smiled weakly. "Dude, you don't need that junk but sure, I'll look."
Dustin beamed and let out a thanks before he ran off.
Steve only shook his head and turned around, jumping as he saw Eddie standing there.
"Dude, warn a guy!"
Eddie stayed quiet as he stared at Steve.
"Munson?"
"What's going on?"
Steve was startled before the panic set in. Eddie would tell them all and he couldn't have that.
"The horde was… something… and… and I saw Tommy… he was there… in the horde. I know we weren't friends any more but he had been my first friend, you know? And the thought that that could happen to them at any time…" Steve let out a shuddering breath. He looked back at Eddie who's eyes had softened.
"I understand. You're heading out?"
Steve nodded as he scrubbed his eyes. "Yeah.. keep them and yourself safe, while I'm out, okay?"
Eddie grinned a bit. "Worried about little ol' me?"
Steve hesitated before hugging him. Eddie squawked and he held his hands above Steve's waist, never actually hugging him.
"I mean it, Eddie Munson. Those kids love you and your uncle still needs you."
Eddie never hugged back as Steve pulled away.
"And my fucking jerky better be there when I get back. I know you're the one taking it."
"Hey! I am not!" But Eddie was grinning too big as Steve nodded a bit.
"Imma check with everyone else before I head out."
"Man… that attack really scared you."
"...yeah… it really did…"
Lucas and Max were next.
Well Lucas. Max was asleep, head laying in Lucas's lap.
Steve took a seat next to him, the boy setting down his book.
"How are you feeling?"
Lucas gave a small grin. "Like I never want to run again."
Steve huffed out a laugh, wrapping an arm around him. "We got lucky today…"
Lucas leaned into him, nodding. "I know. I'm sorry."
"It wasn't your fault." Steve kissed the side of his head. "Just promise you'll be careful."
"Always Steve, always."
Steve grinned and leaned down, kissing Max's head as well. "Tell her I'm making her promise as well."
"Heading out to patrol?"
Steve nodded and smiled at his worried look. "I'll be okay."
Lucas only nodded and pressed into him before leaning away.
"I'll see you later."
Lucas felt something in the back of his mind but he nodded, smiling as Steve as the older got up to leave.
Next was the infirmary. Jonathan was sitting there, arm in a sling as Nancy cleaned his cuts.
"Hey, Steve," Jonathan called as he walked in.
Nancy glanced at him with a worried smile. Steve stared at Jonathan before walking to him and hugging him.
"Steve!" Nancy huffed.
"You're a fucking dumbass, Jon. Never do that shit again."
Jonathan wrapped his good arm around Steve. "Sorry I didn't let you be the hero." He huffed out a laugh and Steve winced.
"You gotta stay for your mom and brother and Nancy. Got that? You get hurt again and I'm kicking your ass."
Jonathan only laughed as Steve turned to Nancy who smiled more genuinely. "Keep him in line for me while I'm on patrol."
"Isn't it too soon?"
Steve shook his head. "Gotta make sure none followed us." He hugged her as well and kissed her head. "Jon, make sure she rests."
"Hey!"
"Will do, captain." Jonathan's lips quirked into a small smirk, poking fun at Steve's old job.
"I should make you walk the plank."
All three laughed and Steve wanted to cry. He'd never have moments like this again.
He found Erica in her room, and he slipped in, nail bat in hand.
"The fuck is that?" Erica snipped and Steve only shook his head with a sigh.
"I'm going to wash your mouth out with soap."
"I'd like to see you try, Sailor boy."
Steve laughed and sat on her bed, handing over the bat. "It was mine, in the beginning. I'm giving it to you."
"Why?" She eyed Steve up and down, frowning. "What's going on?"
"Today scared me, Erica, and I know you weren't there but I can't help but be worried. I know they won't give you a gun so I want you to have my bat."
Erica was silent as she picked up the bat. "Something's wrong. What is it? And I don't want your bullshit excuses."
Steve sighed harshly. "Erica. Stop."
The girl looked at him, frowning. Steve had never spoken to her in that tone.
"Erica, I need you to be safe and I need you to be protected. Do you understand me?"
Erica huffed and crossed her arms. "Why?"
"Wh…why?! Why do I need that?! Because I love you, Erica! Because you're my damn kid and I'll be damned if something happens to you! So take the damn bat!"
Erica stared at him, eyes just a bit wide but nothing more. "Fine. I'll take your ugly ass bat."
"Hey, don't call Baby ugly!"
…..
Erica snorted and laughed. "Did you name it?!"
"Her name is Baby and she's the best. Unlike some snot nosed brat I know."
"Yeah, Dustin is a brat huh?"
Steve laughed, throwing his head back before he shook his head. "Erica, I'm going on patrol, okay?"
"You better come back." She held out her pinky and Steve wanted to run. He didn't want to make this promise.
He hooked his pinky with hers. "Promise."
To Erica, it somehow sounded like a goodbye.
Will, Mike, and Jane were all cuddled up under some blankets when he knocked on the door.
Mike huffed at him while Jane and Will smiled.
Steve… was so relieved these three hadn't been out scouting when the horde attacked. He knew Mike would have pulled some fuck ass shit.
"How are you three?"
"I'm okay, Steve." Jane, sweet as could be.
"Could be worse." Will, just as sweet, if not more shy than his twin.
"What do you want?" Ah yes, Mike. The little shithead.
"I want to talk to you about what happened."
Jane frowned as Will looked worried.
"This is why we need you all to practice being vigilant and work on your aim. We got damn lucky today. So fucking lucky."
"So what?" Mike snapped. "We're all going to die anyways! What's the fucking point?!"
Steve snatched Mike up and refused to let go as he struggled against him. He kept his arms wrapped around the boy as the sobs started and Mike collapsed into him.
"I want my mom!" He sobbed out and Steve shushed him gently, rocking him.
"I know… I know kid… but we have Nancy and Holly. She's asleep in the next room, you know that. Claudia has her. Holly is okay. I know you want your mom. I'm sorry, Mike."
Mime gripped onto him and Steve looked at the other two, holding out one of his arms.
They immediately cuddled into him as Steve settled into the nest they had made.
Steve held onto all of them, mumbling gently as he held them the best he could. It would be the last time he'd ever get to.
It took a bit for Mike to calm down, more time than Steve was comfortable with.
"Okay… you okay?"
Mike nodded against his chest and Steve kissed his head. "Good. I'll look for your mom while on patrol…"
"Promise?" His voice was wrecked.
"Promise." Steve squeezed him before turning to Jane and hugging her close, kissing her nose. "You look after him okay?"
Jane giggled softly. "I promise…"
Steve turned to Will who looked so sad before he hugged him close, loudly kissing his cheek.
Will laughed and pushed him away. "Stop!"
"Never." His heart couldn't take it. "Okay. You three stay safe and take care of each other."
"Promise, Steve." Jane smiled at him.
He gathered all three in a hug before standing up. "I'm heading out now."
"Be careful."
"Always."
Steve left then and immediately ran into Robin.
"Evie!"
"Robbie!"
They stared at each other before Robin hugged him tight. "I heard what happened. Fucking hell… you okay?"
He didn't want to lie to her. So he didn't. "I will be, just a bit tired."
She pulled back, scanning his face, frowning. "You're going on patrol."
"I am."
"Don't."
"Robin-"
"No! Steve, you just faced a horde, let someone else do it."
Steve hugged her tight and kissed her head. "I'll be okay. I just have to be sure, okay? You hold down the fort while I'm gone. Be sure to smack Dustin for me."
Robin was trembling as she gripped onto him. "Steve… Steve don't go… please…"
She knew… of course she knew.
She always did.
"You know I can't…" He whispered into her hair. "I love you…. I love you so fucking much."
"I can't do it… don't make me live without you…."
"I'm sorry…"
Robin buried her face in his neck. "I love you too…."
Steve pulled back, cupping her face. "Promise me you'll try."
"I can't…"
"... promise me you'll protect my kids…"
"Fuck you… fuck you, Steve Harrington."
"Steve Buckley," he corrected and she sobbed quietly. "Don't tell them… promise me you won't tell them."
".... I promise…"
Steve pulled his necklace from under his shirt, an old pendant in the shape of a rose. He slipped it from over his head and onto Robin's neck. "There…"
"Please…" She tried one last time, grabbing his hand with both of hers.
Steve only brought her hands up and kissed them. "I love you."
"I love you too… I'll see you again."
"Promise, Robbie."
Steve kissed her forehead before slipping away.
Robin quickly made her way to an empty room before she broke down, gripping the necklace. "I hate you… I hate you so much.. come back… please come back…" her voice cracked.
"Miss Robin?" Wayne's voice sounded from the other side of the door and Robin froze.
"I won't force you to come out, but Eds says I give great hugs. I think you might need one. Can I come in?"
Robin only let out a quiet okay before the door opened, Wayne quickly stepping in and closing the door.
When he turned to her, his eyes immediately fell to Steve's necklace and he felt his heart drop.
"Shit…"
"He was bit, Wayne… he was bit…"
Wayne gathered the girl in his arms as she sobbed. "I'm sorry, sweetheart… I'm so sorry…"
"He doesn't want me to tell them…"
"Shit…"
Steve only took his revolver. He didn't want to take a chance losing too many bullets that could be used by the others.
And he knew how far he had to be so they wouldn't hear…
Steve wiped the tears from his face, taking a deep breath. He had to.
The trek was a bit rough but he made it to the one area he knew they would find him. Where Robin would find him.
He stared at the small house, lips trembling before he stepped inside. All of his and Robin's belongings stared back at him.
They had just bought the house before the outbreak. It was meant to be their home…
He made his way to the back bedroom and sat on the messy bed. He hated this. All of it. But… if it meant keeping them from having to shoot him later…
He pulled out the revolver, staring down at it before he lifted it up, a sob ripping from him.
When hour three hit, well after the time Steve should have made it back, was when everyone got antsy.
Three hours and thirty minutes?
They have a small group to do the search.
Four hours and thirteen minutes when Joyce's heartbroken voice echoed over the walkie-talkies, Robin's cries easily heard in the background.
Eddie held Dustin close as the boy screamed and cried, struggling hard to get away.
Mike clung to Holly, eyed almost empty of emotions as the tears fell down his face.
Will and Jane held onto each other, beside Mike and Holly, both sobbing.
Max could be heard screaming and cussing, the computers and monitors being trashed in the room she had locked herself in all while Lucas hugged his knees, head buried in them as he sat out the locked door.
Erica stared blankly at the exit, hand gripping the bat. "He fucking promised me…"
Claudia, tears streaming down her face, pulled Erica into her side. "I know…"
Joyce sobbed silently as she watched Robin lay Steve down properly, the girl's own cries echoing throughout the house.
"His hair, Joyce. I.. I have to fix his hair. He would hate this… Joyce, I have to get the blood out of it." Robin rambled weakly and Joyce… she didn't have the heart to deny her. Not with this.
So she found a few old water bottles and rags, and helped clean Steve up; forcibly taking up so Robin didn't have to clean the wound.
And by the time they were done, Hopper and Wayne had stepped in.
"Fuck…" Hopper's voice broke and Joyce immediately hugged him, sobbing.
Wayne moved to Robin, kneeling by her and placing a hand on her back. "I'll say a prayer for him… Miss Robin, what would you like us to do…"
"Burn it… just… just burn the entire house…. I never want to be here again…" Her voice was barely above a whisper.
"Do you want anyt-"
"Nothing… absolutely nothing…"
Wayne glanced at Hopper and the man nodded. "Okay… okay we will do that…"
Robin didn't say anything after that.
And she would barely say anything ever again.
Why would she? How could she?
Her soulmate, her Steve, was gone.
There wasn't a point anymore.
But she promised to take care of the kids…
So that's what she would do.
I wish I could say they healed over time, but we all know… Steve's death broke them in so many ways.
Ways that would never be repaired.
But they survived, they pushed forward.
But it was never the same.