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Sunoo was starting to get annoyed. Why were people treating him like a child? Sunoo was an adult. He wasn’t a child, so why did the people around him treat him like one? Sunoo was confused. Confused and annoyed. Mostly annoyed though. So, he resolved himself. He was going to show everyone he was not as fragile as they thought he was.
But, how exactly do you do that? Sunoo really didn’t know, he was mostly used to showing his softer side to his members after all. He liked who he was when he was with his members, he felt strong, confident, and proud of who he was when he was with his members. He supposed it started after their debut.
🤍
2020
Finally, it was finally happening. They were finally going to debut, and after all of the hard work Sunoo put into it, you better believe he wasn’t going to not bask in the glory. He’d been through too much to go back now. He silently thought of his past, flashes of memories scurrying through his mind.
One too many trips to the hospital, each time Sunoo ran a fever that was much too high for his tiny body. His heartbeat far too slow for someone his age. Countless different hospitals, countless different rooms and doctors. Sunoo was sick of the hospital. He just had to hope and pray each day his heart would keep beating and he would keep surviving. He was sick of just surviving. He wanted to live. He wanted to experience regular things with people his age, have best friends he could share anything with. Alas, he was cursed to roam the halls of the hospital for eternity. That is until one fateful day. He was finally at the top of the list for a heart transplant. He was greenlit for a new heart, and he couldn’t have been happier. Now, he could finally achieve his dream without having to worry about further complications to his health. He could finally be a kpop idol.
Sure, there were a few more times when Sunoo would get sick as a trainee, but it wasn’t anything Sunoo and the other trainees couldn’t deal with. Sunoo’s immune system had built itself up significantly after his heart transplant, and he was able to consistently go back to hapkido for a little bit before he became a trainee, so that was nice. The only time in his life he had been able to consistently go to hapkido was when he was a child, when his heart condition hadn’t affected him quite yet. He poured his new heart into everything he touched, he put a little bit of himself into everything he did.
Finally, the moment came and he debuted next to the six best friends of his life. Sunoo was so incredibly happy. All of his hard work was finally paying off. The feeling was so incredibly gratifying to Sunoo, he basked in the glory of debuting.
He loved his members more than anything, he didn’t have to worry about being a certain Sunoo in front of them. He could just be his natural self in front of them, no masks. Maybe that’s why he acted softer around his members. He didn’t pay it much mind at first, it was the most natural part of him after all. But when the other members started doting on him and taking care of him, he was pretty annoyed. He quickly realized they assumed a lot of things about him–– the main one being that he was as fragile as a glass dish and one wrong move on their part would cause him to break. Sunoo hated that assumption. It reminded him of his childhood–– and not the good times. The constant whispers of the poor boy or I feel sorry for his family , swirling around the air every time he landed in the hospital. Sunoo hated when people assume things like that.
🤍
The others loved Sunoo. Some could argue they loved him maybe a little too much. The member of their maknae line was just so, incredibly cute. To all of them. They wanted to coddle him and protect him like there was no tomorrow. So, that’s what they did. They coddled him and vowed to protect him like there was no tomorrow.
Sunoo really didn’t know the first thing about how to show the tough side of himself to the others. Plus, he wasn’t exactly used to doing something like this. However, that didn’t mean there weren’t chances when Sunoo couldn’t show his tough side to his members. The first scenario came when they were coming back to Korea from a short trip to Japan for the first leg of their Asia tour.
They were just informed that there was already a crowd waiting outside of the doors in front of their gate, mostly consisting of fans screaming their names. It was still early in the morning, about 4 or 5 in the morning, yet there was a horde of fans waiting for them. They should’ve expected something like this, but it still surprised them all how dedicated their fans could be to their schedules. It felt nice but also a little too much at the same time. Most of them just stayed quiet and crowded together, a natural defense mechanism. This time would be no different, or at least, that’s what they all thought.
They all steeled themselves silently, preparing themselves for the event they were about to experience, yet again. Finally, the moment came and they walked out of their gate and into the hordes of fans waiting for them. They crowded together, forming a general clump in the middle of the walkway, adrenaline rushing through their veins as they continued staring at the ground. The horde of fans quickly surrounds them, pushing some of them harshly and making them feel claustrophobic. Sunoo kept his eyes peeled, for some reason he could sense a malevolent presence from someone in the crowd. He looked to his members silently, a bad feeling rising in his chest. Then, he saw red. A flash registered in his mind, and he widened his eyes as he ran to stand in front of Heeseung. A knife registered in Sunoo’s mind and his body lunged forward, grabbing the arm of the perpetrator before twisting them to the ground painfully. The perpetrator groaned loudly, Sunoo letting go of his arm as he panted slightly. He turned back around to the older boy, scanning him for any injuries. Luckily, there weren’t any on his body, just a shook expression. Sunoo relieved greatly upon realizing the older was okay, adrenaline leaving his body.
As the adrenaline from the incident left his body, Sunoo felt a strange pain bloom on the left side of his lower abdomen. Blood started to coat through his sweater and Sunoo silently bit his lip as he held his hand tightly over it. He looked around carefully, spotting a bloodied knife behind the crowd of people. He started walking forward, away from the crowd with his members, his left side clenching in pain with each step. He slightly moved his hand from the spot of his stab wound, clutching it back to his wound when he saw the red of his blood on his hand. Shit. This was bad. He needed to go to the hospital with a wound like this; even if he didn’t want to. If he didn’t go, the others would definitely force him to. That was…unless they didn’t notice. Maybe, if he hid it well enough he could just go home and stitch it up himself. Yeah, that was a plan. Maybe not a good one, but hey, if it kept him out of the hospital it was a good plan in his book.
Sunoo walked out of the airport with the others, hand still clutching over his wound and now slightly sweating. They all quickly packed into their van, Sunoo sitting next to the left window in the very back. Once seated, he relaxed greatly, further upsetting his tense muscles around his injury and making Sunoo wince in pain. Sunghoon, seated next to him, looked at him confusedly.
“Are you okay, Sunoo-yah? You’re sweating a lot…” He put his hand on Sunoo’s shoulder, making the younger turn to him with tired eyes.
“Huh? Oh…I’m fine hyung…I––” Sunoo winced in pain once more, clutching his injury tighter. Sunoo glanced down to his hand once more, which was now fully stained red. Sunghoon glanced down to where Sunoo was looking, eyes widening as he took Sunoo’s hand.
“What’s this?! Sunoo-yah, why is your hand red?!” Sunghoon looked at the blood-soaked hand before looking Sunoo in the eyes. Sunghoon’s eyes scanned down Sunoo’s body, looking for any sign of injury. Then, he spotted it. The stain of red bleeding through Sunoo’s sweater. He lifted the boy’s shirt, finally gazing upon the stab wound located in his lower left abdomen.
“Sunoo-yah, what?! You got stabbed?! Why didn’t you tell us?!” Sunghoon shakily put his hand over Sunoo’s stab wound, eyes welling with involuntary tears.
“I––I didn’t…realize, hyung. I’m sorry, guys.” Sunoo looked to the others, the others worriedly looking between his face and his wound.
“It’s okay. Just…save your strength. We’re taking you to the hospital.” Sunghoon said, still clutching his hand over Sunoo’s wound tightly.
Sunoo leaned back, closing his eyes as he thought I really don’t want to…but looks like I have no choice.
When they arrived at the hospital, Sunoo had fallen asleep, the exhaustion of the situation taking over his body. The doctors treated him, and he was able to go home a couple of days after that. The group were greatly relieved Sunoo quickly recovered from the incident, and somewhat still in shock from how Sunoo handled the whole situation in the first place. Most of them forgot he took Hapkido before they debuted, and by now you can probably guess why they forgot. They couldn’t help it if they forgot that the cutest boy in the world was also a black belt in hapkido. But it would do them good to remember that Sunoo wasn’t as fragile as they perceived him to be. For Sunoo and their own wellbeing.
🤍
That being said, it wasn’t exactly the easiest thing in the world to just magically stop coddling the boy. And with that being said, it’s not like there weren’t other situations that wouldn’t remind the others of how amazing Sunoo actually was. Another one of these scenarios came up when they were well into the comeback, filming a pre-recording of their new title track at Music Bank.
They had gotten a new assistant manager recently since their assistant manager had to leave the company for personal reasons. The boys were saddened by the fact since this manager had been with them since their debut, but they accepted it and threw a goodbye party for him. Their new assistant manager was…different, to put it in a word. Sunoo was on guard around him for the most part, he couldn’t tell if it was because of the constant smell of cigarettes coming off of him, or because he just seemed generally untrustworthy. The others didn’t fail to notice this fact either, which alarmed most of them. Who would even hire this guy if he didn’t like the idols he was working for? They mostly just ignored him in their schedules, only listening when he had something important to recite to them, like their next schedules or the plans the company had for them in the next couple of months. That is, until he scolded one of them for messing up during a performance.
“Jake, I’m very disappointed in you. How could you let your fans down like that?”
“I’m sorry, sir. I just––”
“I wasn’t finished. Even if it was a small mistake, the fans still noticed. And Jungwon, you have to control your facial expressions better during the performance. It’s good you’re trying to work hard, but you have to be perfect while making it look effortless. Oh, and Sunghoon, you need to raise your arms higher during the last chorus of the song, it looks like you’re just trying to be lazy.”
He tapped his foot against the floor of their dressing room, arms crossed defensively over his chest as he dug his comments into them.
Was this really happening? No, right? This was all just an elaborate sequence of events Sunoo was dreaming about, still in his bed smiling as he curled closer into his blankets… right? Something didn’t sit right with Sunoo about this situation. So, he spoke his mind, not thinking about the consequences.
“Sir, with all due respect, the others were great. Sure, Jake-hyung messed up a little, but it was okay because most of the fans didn’t know anyway. They still enjoyed the performance greatly, so what does it matter if Jake-hyung messed up or Jungwon and Sunghoon-hyung didn’t do it exactly as we practiced? We have a lot of things going on at once, sir. We might mess up sometimes, but it’s okay as long as we keep going.”
Sunoo smiled slightly at the older man, stepping in front of him and away from the others.
“What did you say to me?! Is that any way to talk to someone older than you?”
The manager lifted his hand, his fingers stiff and held together, slapping Sunoo across the face before he could even react. Sunoo brought his hand up to touch his now burning left cheek, eyes wide as anger boiled up inside of him. He grabbed the older man’s wrist, twisting it and putting it behind his back as he held the man to the ground with his knee.
“OW! Hey, what do you think you’re doing, huh?!”
“I will give you two seconds to apologize to me and the others. Otherwise, I’ll twist your wrist so you’ll never be able to do anything with it ever again.” Sunoo’s hand clutched the man’s wrist tighter, fully meaning the threatening comment.
“Okay, okay! I’m sorry, I take it all back. Please, let me go now!”
Sunoo let go of the man’s wrist and stood up, slightly pushing his knee into the man’s back as he fully stood up and turned to face the others with a small smile on his face. The others stood around the room, flabbergasted at Sunoo’s reaction.
Sunoo looked around the room silently, was my reaction a little too much? A nervous expression formed across his face, will they judge me now? Suddenly, a pair of arms wrapped around Sunoo warmly, the boy’s eyes widening silently.
“Thank you, Sunoo-hyung.” Jungwon’s voice came from behind Sunoo, the older boy melting into the hug and smiling silently.
“Of course, Jungwon-ah. Anything for you.” His arms wrapped tighter around the boy before they both left the hug.
“That was awesome, Sunoo-yah!” Heeseung moved closer to the younger boy, hand up as he smiled widely. Sunoo smacked the older’s hand, smiling widely as he saw the others approaching.
“Yah, I guess we can let Sunoo deal with it if we ever get annoyed with someone!” Sunghoon loudly jokes, laughing with the others.
“Yeah, Sunoo-hyung’s awesome!!” Ni-ki praised the older boy.
They all laughed in their dressing room, the staff already packing their stuff up for their next schedule that day. They all continued to laugh about the situation, even in the car to their next schedule. That day really helped them remember how Sunoo was possibly the awesomest person in their group.
🤍
The group encountered one more situation that solidified the idea of ‘Sunoo is not the fragile little antique that most people think he is’ in their minds (and the idea that Sunoo might actually be the most awesome person in their group as well, but we’ll get to that later).
It was the end of the year, they had just finished their first world tour in their whole career, and to say they were tired would be the biggest understatement. Since they just spent the last two months overseas, it made sense. Luckily, their company recognized this and gave them a full two week break. To some, that may not seem like very much, but to a k-pop group that was the most precious amount of time ever. Two full weeks without nonstop fancalls, driving to photoshoots, commercial shootings, variety shows, recording, studying, practicing, or even moving. They were all greatly relieved for the two weeks to recharge, each of them either planned to go back home or take a vacation with another member.
At least, that’s what they were planning. But, when Jake, Jungwon, Jay, and Sunghoon fell sick with the flu the night they came back to Incheon, everyone put their plans on hold to take care of them. It made sense, after two whole months in different countries of course their immune systems would be significantly weakened. With four sick patients, Sunoo knew he couldn’t take care of them all alone, so he enlisted the others' help. Since Sunoo had been in and out of the hospital almost all of his life, he knew exactly how to help the others when they fell sick, remembering back to his past and what the nurses always told him when he got sick.
“The most important thing is to keep your body hydrated and vitamins flowing through it.”
And that’s what he did every time the others got sick. Luckily, most of the time his immune system kept working while the others were sick, so he didn’t get sick along with them. Since most of the others didn’t know how to take care of sick patients either, it definitely helped the situation.
Sadly, it didn’t take long for Heeseung, Ni-ki, and Sunoo to get sick too. Luckily it hadn’t been as serious as the others, it wasn’t something to the point where Sunoo couldn’t move off of his bed like his brothers. He, Heeseung, and Ni-ki got sick on the same day, so Sunoo took it upon himself to order everyone a giant pot of frozen ginseng chicken soup to heat up so everyone would feel better quickly. He scrolled through the delivery app they always used, trying to find a place that sold it. He soon found one and ordered enough for everyone, not hesitating to use his personal funds to feed everyone. Once the food arrived, Sunoo grabbed the biggest pot from their kitchen and dumped the soup in, slightly flinching when some broth landed on his cheek. He licked it off, delighting at the flavor before turning their stove on. He stirred the soup for a while, checking the flavor once before nodding to himself. He put out seven bowls on their counter and poured the soup into each bowl before nodding to himself once more. He lightly coughed into his hand before grabbing two bowls and walking to the nearest bedroom. He slightly knocked on the door before entering, frankly not caring if the other boys didn’t want him in there. He knew they were too sick to reply anyway.
He locked eyes with Sunghoon and Jake, each in their beds with the covers pulled to their shoulders. He slightly smiled as both boys groaned at the creak of their door, lifting their heads simultaneously.
“I have some ginseng chicken soup for you both~ try and eat it while it’s still hot, okay?” Sunoo smiled at both of them, setting both bowls on their bedside tables.
“Aigooo…our Sunoo-yah is too kind even when he’s sick~” Sunghoon smiled widely from his bed, teasing tone evident in his wide smile.
Sunoo lightly scoffed before coughing once more.
“It’s nothing, hyungs. I can take care of this much.” Sunoo said as he stuck his cooling bandage back on his forehead, it was starting to slip off because of his sweat.
“Yeah, but remember you’re sick too Sunoo-yah. We can feed ourselves if you want to rest.” Jake said from his bed, worried expression on his face.
“It’s fine, hyung. I can take care of myself and you guys too. Just focus on getting better and then worry about me, how about that? Oh, it’s time to take your medicine and vitamins. Hold on, I’ll get some new water for you guys.” Sunoo said as he looked at his phone, his alarm going off to give everyone their medicine and vitamins. Usually, he would be better prepared than this with a basket of water to pass around the dorm, but cooking the soup took longer than he thought. He quickly ran to their fridge, getting seven bottles of water and putting it in the basket. He made his rounds to each room, reminding everyone to take their medicine and vitamins (and feeding it to the ones who were still too weak to move properly), before making his rounds to each of their rooms with soup, imploring them to try and get something in their stomach even if they didn’t feel like it.
Once he finished making his rounds to each member, he sat on the couch, sighing to himself as he finally had a moment to himself. His vision slightly blurred, and he sighed loudly to himself, walking to their bathroom and grabbing another cooling bandage from their box. He noticed how they were running low, and quickly pulled out his phone, hoping they could be delivered straight to their dorm with no hassle. Luckily, they could, and they’d be there the next day so that was good. If it came down to it, Sunoo figured he could use a washcloth and a basin of cold water on the members who still ran a fever like him, but he’d rather avoid it if he could.
Once he applied another cooling bandage to his forehead and fixed his bangs to cover it, he left the bathroom feeling refreshed. He sat down on the couch once more, slurping on the soup to see if it was still warm. Luckily, it was and Sunoo sighed to himself, scrolling on his phone as he ate the soup with a small smile on his face. He just couldn’t help but appreciate moments like this, especially when he was sick or tired. Call him sappy all you want, but at the end of the day it was things like this that kept Sunoo happy and thriving. Warm soup. Smiles from his sick members. Taking care of his best friends. He loved his life so much.
Once he finished his soup, he cleaned his bowl out and put it in their dishwasher, leaving it open in case any of the other members finished their bowls. He walked closer to Jake and Sunghoon’s door to collect their plates, going to knock on it before he overheard the older two talking.
“Sunoo is so awesome in situations like this. He can still take care of us despite being just as sick as us. And he doesn’t forget to take care of himself too. He’s really so cool like this.” Sunghoon’s muffled voice came through the door, fondness of the boy coming through his tone. Sunoo flinched back, slightly smiling as his already-red cheeks blushed.
“He really is. I was worried at first, but he really is taking care of himself as well as the rest of us. And he’s being so nonchalant about it. We really should do something to show him our thanks when we get better.” Jake’s muffled voice came from the other side of the room. Sunoo smiled widely, before composing himself, rubbing his cheeks to try and hide the blush already spread across it. Once fully composed, he knocked on the door, hearing a muffled ‘come in’ from the other side.
He entered and smiled at both of them before checking the bowls on their bedside tables. He smiled widely when he gazed upon the empty bowls, happy they finished it.
“Aigooo…the children finished their food, yay!” Sunoo teased both of them, patting them on their heads as he collected their bowls.
They both snickered under Sunoo’s teasing attitude, frankly too tired to make a comeback. Once he left their room and cleaned their bowls, he put them in the dishwasher and made his rounds to the others’ rooms, collecting their bowls and tucking them in tighter to their beds, some already drifting off to sleep once more. Finally, he made it to the last room of his rounds, his and Jungwon’s room.
He collected the younger’s half-full bowl, pouring the soup back into the pot in the kitchen before cleaning his bowl and setting it in their dishwasher, putting a cleaner in it and turning it on. He then went back to his and Jungwon’s room, entering carefully in case the younger was already sleeping. Jungwon was drifting off in his bed, that far off look in his eyes told Sunoo exactly what he wanted to know. Sunoo sat down next to Jungwon’s bedside, patting his legs under the blankets carefully as the younger boy was further lulled into sleep.
“Hyung…” Jungwon whispered, eyes closed and voice tired.
“Mmm?” Sunoo said lightly, softly smiling and still patting Jungwon’s legs.
“You’re so amazing…” The younger boy whispered, admiration somehow evident in his tone.
Sunoo snickered ever so lightly, so as not to wake the younger.
“I’m really not…” He whispered, true feelings coming to center stage.
Jungwon shook his head, eyes still closed as he turned his head closer to Sunoo’s general direction.
“You still…take care of us…and yourself. And…you have so many skills. I really appreciate you, hyung.” Jungwon slightly opened his eyes, checking to see if the boy was actually listening. Sunoo was still softly smiling at him, hand still in between his legs under the cover.
“You really are amazing, hyung. You’re cool, and awesome, and just amazing. I could list so many reasons about how and why, but I think it’s just more straightforward to say that. We all really love you, hyung. I hope you know that, hyung.”
Sunoo’s smile slightly faltered, eyes glowing with a newfound adrenaline. He felt it. He felt it in Jungwon’s words. He felt it deep in his bones. He felt it deep in his chest, in the innermost secret chamber of his precious heart. His whole being felt it. If he showed Jungwon the biggest and most genuine smile of his life that day, no one would know but them.
When Sunghoon came into their room a couple of hours later to check on Sunoo since he missed their usual schedule for medicine and vitamins, the sight he was met with surprised him greatly. There, Jungwon and Sunoo were cuddled up with each other on Jungwon’s bed, both with the cutest smiles on both of their faces.
That incident would never let them forget, that even though Sunoo definitely had the softest side in their group, he could also take care of himself, and how he was probably the most awesome member ever, but the rest of Enhypen would rather take that to their grave than ever admit it in public.
Fin