Work Text:
Look, Tommy wasn’t-
He wasn’t stupid, okay?
He knew that he needed a flock.
It was just-
Well.
He didn’t exactly have many options for people who would be willing to accept him like that.
Accept him into their family, love him.
He was difficult. He knew that.
But Gods, did he want a flock.
He wasn’t doing good without one.
He could feel it, in the way his heart felt heavy, the way his skin crawled when someone touched him, their touch never right, the way his red wings felt like they were uncared for-
(He tried his best, but something in his instincts wouldn’t let him feel like his wings were truly cared for without a flock.)
The hollow aching, this almost-desperation for someone he cared about, someone who cared about him, to touch him, hold him, to-
Carry him in the space in their heart reserved for family, for those they truly, deeply loved.
The space for flock.
It was a desire always on the edge of his thoughts.
But.
Avians were rare.
And they were unlikely to want some kid they didn’t know in their flock.
(Tommy had only met an avian flock the once, when he was a little kid.)
(They hadn’t wanted him.)
Tommy hadn’t had a flock at all, that he could remember.
He must’ve had his parents, at least, when he was born.
But they had died when he was just a baby.
And Tommy had been alone.
Alone.
He hated this ache in his chest.
He would do anything for it to go away.
\(oo)/
Tommy’s apartment sucked, but at least he had one.
It was small, all of his furniture scavenged from garage sales where it was cheap because it was half broken or stained.
He really, really hated it.
He tried his best to have an imitation of a nest, something to settle him, but it was pathetic.
Just a few blankets, piled up in the corner of his room.
Nothing at all like a flock nest.
Nothing at all like what he wanted.
But it was the best he could do.
Tommy sighed, getting out of the stupid, horrible, depressing nest.
At least it helped a little, with his instincts.
He had to go to work.
He caught a glance of his wings in the mirror, the feathers ruffled and crooked.
He tried to smooth them out, but it was useless.
Even when he could see that they were fine, there was an itching in his brain saying ‘no no no they have to be messed up, flock hasn’t preened them-!’
Tommy turned away from the mirror.
This was such a bad start to his day.
Some days, he could deal with it, ignore his instincts yelling at him-
But today wasn’t one of those days.
His wings felt horrible, he felt horrible.
He just wanted someone to take care of him.
He couldn’t do anything about it.
He didn’t have a flock.
And Avians were too clingy for the other hybrids, and never mind about humans.
He was just…stuck.
Stuck all alone.
It was fine.
It had to be fine.
(It wasn’t.)
He had to be fine.
(He wasn’t.)
\(oo)/
Work was just as it always was.
The absolute worst.
He hated his job.
So much.
“Tommy! Hurry up with those shelves!” his manager called from the front of the store.
Tommy rolled his eyes, but started to stack the cans of tuna a bit faster.
He didn’t want to get fired, even if he hated his job.
He needed the money for rent.
Even if he hated the apartment.
He really needed to figure out a new job, one that wasn’t stocking shelves at the supermarket.
He would try for one of those messenger gigs that they always wanted hybrids that could fly for, but-
Flockless Avians didn’t really do well with flying.
Which Tommy hated.
More than anything else, almost.
(He hated that he didn’t have someone who cared about him more.)
He wanted to fly.
He knew that if he tried, his instincts would scream at him that he couldn’t, that he didn’t have a flock, that if he fell no one would catch him-
Tommy shook his head.
He’d already turned this over in his head so many times, he didn’t need a repeat.
He started to stack the cans again.
His wings felt like they were weighed down by lead.
So did his heart.
\(oo)/
Tommy was walking home.
Like he always did.
He didn’t have the money for a car, and he didn’t live far enough from the supermarket to make going by bus worth it, especially considering none of the bus routes went by his apartment complex.
He was almost home when someone bumped into him.
He stumbled back slightly, gearing up to ask what the hell their problem was-
But he froze instead.
The man had wings.
Beautiful pink ones, broad and strong to match his body.
He had pink hair to match, and wearing a ridiculous outfit, looking almost like a pirate, but Tommy barely noticed, too focused on the wings.
The man was an Avian.
And he looked healthy, which meant he had a flock.
There was a flock nearby-
The man looked at Tommy with a regretful expression.
“Shit sorry, I didn’t mean to knock into you, kid.”
Tommy almost wondered why the man hadn’t noticed Tommy’s wings, but-
Oh.
He was wearing a red shirt.
And he always held his wings close to his back.
And they were small.
Barely big enough to carry him, if he could’ve flown without his instincts freaking out.
It was easy to miss, if you weren’t looking.
And why would the man be looking?
The man frowned.
His presence was so soothing to Tommy’s instincts.
Gods Tommy couldn’t-
“You okay?”
Tommy realized that he still hadn’t responded to him.
“Yeah I’m fine big man, don’t worry about it!” Tommy said, trying to act normal.
The man nodded.
“Well, have a good day.”
He kept walking down the sidewalk, away from Tommy.
He felt a chirp bubble up in his throat, a ‘please no come back I’m alone you have to come back-!’
But he swallowed it down.
He knew that he was a lot.
And he didn’t think he could handle it, to be so close to having a flock and lose that chance.
So he kept walking.
Back to his shitty apartment, and his depressing attempt at a nest.
(The tips of his wings shifted, almost stretching out towards the other Avian as he left.)
(For all that he wasn’t going to take the chance-)
(Tommy still wanted a flock.)
(He’d do anything for it.)
(Except risk rejection.)
\(oo)/
It really shouldn’t have surprised him, the next time.
If there was a flock nearby, he should’ve realized he’d eventually run into another Avian.
(They must’ve moved recently, he’d never seen them or heard of there being a flock nearby before.)
(He lived in a big town, sure, but it wasn’t quite big enough that he wouldn’t have seen them around if they’d been living here for a while.)
It was his day off, and he liked to spend his days off at the park.
It was better than spending them in his apartment.
And it wasn’t like he had the extra money to do something else.
So, the park it was.
It was cold, almost winter, so he’d bundled up in a coat, trying to protect his wings from the chilly air.
The other good thing about this was that he got less looks.
Avians were rare.
Ones that were obviously alone were rarer.
He didn’t get the looks at work as much, but-
He was at just the right age for people to expect him to have some independence from his flock, like a part time job, while they also assumed that he wouldn’t spend much, if any of his free time away from them.
(If he had a flock, he would’ve fallen right into their assumptions.)
(He would’ve spent all of the time he could with them.)
So, he got weird looks, when he went to the park with his wings out.
Tommy was walking aimlessly around, when he heard something.
A guitar.
And the faint sounds of someone singing.
He grinned, following the sound.
He loved it when there was a musician set up in the park.
It was always nice, listening to music.
Tommy went down the path, listening for the music, before he found the musician leaning against a tree, just off the path.
He had his guitar case in front of him, open for any money people felt like giving him.
He wore a yellow sweater, and brown hair, which was almost blending into the tree behind him.
He was singing some slow song, something Tommy had never heard before.
It was pretty though.
Tommy liked it.
Something about the man’s voice was soothing, relaxing him.
The guy was a really good singer.
(There was something else about the man, something that just made Tommy feel settled in a way he hadn’t before.)
Tommy walked closer, standing a bit away from the man.
Somehow, he was the only one there, no one else stopping to listen to the music.
The song ended, and the man turned to Tommy, a smile on his face.
“Hey, any requests?” he asked.
Tommy startled.
He hadn’t expected the guy to talk to him.
“Oh uh, I don’t really listen to music much.”
He didn’t.
His crappy phone barely managed calls and texts, never mind streaming music.
And it wasn’t like he had a computer or CD player.
The man shrugged.
“Doesn’t really matter. Any genres or vibes you like? Happy, sad?”
Tommy thought for a moment.
“Could you- I mean, do you know any about family?”
The man gave Tommy a soft smile.
“Yeah, I do.”
He started to play, something starting off slow before getting more upbeat, about finding your family and loving them.
Tommy had never heard it before.
He loved it.
It was-
It was everything he wanted.
The man held the last note for a moment, turning to Tommy, only for his expression to get panicked.
“Fuck, I didn’t mean to make you cry! Are you okay, you’re okay right?”
Tommy held up a hand to his check, realizing that it was streaked with tears.
He hadn’t realized he’d been crying.
He gave the man a watery smile.
“I’m okay, I just really like the song, it’s really poggers.”
The man’s face took on a confused expression.
“What- ‘Poggers’?”
Tommy knew that would be his reaction.
“Yeah, I made it up. It means cool, or good.” Tommy said, a wide smirk on his face.
People always got so confused when he used his slang, it was a great way to get people to stop asking him questions.
The man nodded, before he focused back on Tommy.
“Seriously though, you’re okay? I don’t think I’ve ever had someone cry over one of my songs before.”
Tommy nodded, before his brain caught on something.
“Wait, your songs? Did you write that?”
“Yeah.” The man said simply, almost like he expected Tommy to think it was embarrassing or something.
“Dude that’s awesome, you’re like, the biggest man ever for that! After me of course.”
The man smiled.
“Well, thank you, I think.”
Tommy rolled his eyes.
“Of course that was a compliment, big man.”
The man laughed, setting his guitar down on the grass next to him.
He stood up, apparently wanting to talk to Tommy more.
And Tommy’s breath caught.
The man had wings, brown ones with golden streaks.
Tommy hadn’t seen them before, tucked behind the man against the tree as they were.
Tommy took a step back, his own wings pressed against his back and aching.
He couldn’t-
He should’ve have realized that he would run into more Avians from the pink haired man’s flock.
It had been a few weeks, and Tommy had almost managed to convince himself that the man had just been visiting-
But obviously he hadn’t been.
Tommy stepped back.
The man looked at him, worry on his face.
“Hey, I was just getting up so we could talk a bit more, are you-“
“I’m great! Yep I’m fine don’t worry about me big man, I just realized that I have to go!” Tommy said in a rush, trying to get it all out in one breath.
He didn’t know what his face looked like right now, but he knew that it couldn’t be good.
He felt a chirp bubble up in his throat.
‘please please PLEASE I’m alone I need someone be that someone-‘
He choked it back.
He couldn’t, couldn’t, couldn’t.
He couldn’t handle this.
His chest burned with the desire to touch the other Avian, to just let him know what Tommy was-
But he couldn’t take that chance, couldn’t put himself out there.
The man stepped forward, and-
Tommy ran.
\(oo)/
It was worse.
It was so much worse.
Now that he knew that there was a flock nearby, one that had such nice members-
(He’d barely talked to them, but they had both been so kind, checking on him and being so easy to be around-)
He could barely handle it before, being alone and without a flock.
But now, he just couldn’t deal with it.
His wings hurt all the time, and his instincts were telling him that he wasn’t safe, he needed to find them, needed to have a flock, he wasn’t safe-!
And even if his nest was shit, it had provided just a little bit of what his instincts wanted-
But now he was acutely aware that it was absolutely nothing, nothing like it should be.
It made being in his apartment so much worse.
It made everything so much worse.
It had been a month since he’d run away from the man with the brown wings.
And Tommy really didn’t think he could make it much longer like this.
He dragged himself out of bed to go to work and to eat and use the bathroom.
That was it.
He couldn’t muster up the energy to do anything else.
Except he’d finally managed to run out of food.
He’d been living off of random cans he’d had in his cupboards for the last few days, but he’d eaten the weird canned mac and cheese he didn’t know when he’d bought last night.
So, he had to go to the store.
He threw on a hoodie, worn and red.
It was his favorite.
It usually provided him with a small amount of comfort, familiar and soft.
But all he could think about was how much he ached.
He held his wings close to himself as he walked to the store, it being well and truly winter by now.
It wasn’t the supermarket he worked at.
That one was too far away for him to want to walk to if he didn’t have to, and he didn’t want to deal with any of his coworkers.
He tried his best to act normal when he was at work, and he thought it might even be working.
Instead, he went to a smaller store, one only five minutes from his apartment.
He stepped into the store, warm air blasting onto him from the air conditioning.
It felt nice, at least.
It ruffled his feathers though, which just reminded him how much his wings hurt.
He sighed, grabbing a basket.
He just needed to get some more crappy canned food, and then he could go back home.
Even if he hated his apartment.
He didn’t care enough to do anything else.
He walked towards the canned food aisle, and he was barely paying attention to his surroundings.
But when he heard someone make a small chirp, his head whipped around.
There was a man standing at the end of one of the aisles, looking at-something, Tommy couldn’t focus on what it was.
His deep black wings were held loosely behind him, the green shirt he was wearing a sharp contrast to them. His hair didn’t match his wings either, a blond almost like Tommy’s instead.
He was older then the other two, Tommy’s brain yelling that he was ‘caretaker!’
Tommy couldn’t breathe.
The man was on the phone, seemingly having chirped at the person on the other end.
“Yes, yes Wil I know, I’ll get the brand you like, don’t worry. Now give the phone back to Tech, he still hasn’t told me-“
Tommy could feel a chirp bubbling up in his throat, his instincts screaming at him ‘caretaker! we need him we-‘
He couldn’t-
He couldn’t stop it.
He just didn’t have the energy to.
Gods even if they didn’t want him-
Tommy really couldn’t live like this anymore.
He just had to take a chance.
He chirped.
A desperate sound.
“caretaker please I need someone I don’t have anyone please please please-!”
The man froze.
“Tech. I’ll call you back.”
He turned slowly, seeing Tommy.
Tommy knew that he looked like shit.
The man looked shocked, before he crooned.
‘”fledgling come here I’m here!”
Tommy burst into tears, dropping his basket and running to the man.
He easily wrapped his arms around Tommy, bringing his wings up to shield them.
His touch was perfect, everything Tommy needed.
The man hummed, running his hands over Tommy’s wings.
Tommy’s breath hitched as the pain in his wings finally went away, his instincts settling.
The man looked at Tommy, a fond but worried look on his face.
“Why were you alone? Oh mate, where was your flock?”
Tommy buried his face into the man’s chest, before mumbling “Don’t have one.”
The man stilled.
“No.”
It wasn’t a denial, so much as a plea that what Tommy had said wasn’t, couldn’t be true.
But it was, of course.
The man brought his wings down, Tommy tensing as he did.
“Don’t worry, fledgling.” The man soothed, running a hand over Tommy’s wings one last time before grabbing Tommy’s hand.
“Come on, let’s finish the shopping. And then we’ll go home.”
Tommy wiped at his face with the hand the man wasn’t holding.
He-
“You want me?”
The man smiled at Tommy.
“Of course I do, mate. And your brothers are going to love you.”
Tommy nodded, too exhausted to question exactly what the man meant.
The man quickly grabbed a few more things, tossing them into his cart.
He checked out, before pulling Tommy outside to a car.
It was at this point Tommy realized he had absolutely no clue what the man’s name was.
“What- What’s your name?” He asked, stumbling over his words slightly.
The man smiled as he opened the passenger door, gently pushing Tommy towards it.
“It’s Phil, mate. You can call me Dad, if you want to.”
Oh.
Was his flock just his family?
That was what it was sounding like.
And he still wanted Tommy in it.
Tommy’s eyes watered.
“I’m Tommy.”
Phil smiled.
“Let’s go home, Tommy.”
\(oo)/
It took a bit, twenty minutes, before they made it to Phil’s house.
Home.
Well Tommy hoped.
This felt unreal, and Tommy was almost waiting for Phil to change his mind.
(He knew that he wouldn’t. Avians were so social, and the thought of one being without a flock was one of the worst things to them.)
(Especially if the Avian in question was just barely eighteen, like Tommy.)
Phil was humming lightly to himself as he drove, the sound soothing to Tommy.
They pulled up to a house, one that was tucked away at the edge of town, close enough to it for Tommy to see the fields and farms that ran around it.
It was lovely, absolutely perfect.
Phil got out of the car, quickly walking around to the other side of the car.
Tommy reached out the moment he opened the car door.
Phil immediately took his hand.
He didn’t let go, leading Tommy over to the front door.
“The groceries-?” Tommy asked.
“Don’t worry about it, Tommy. I’ll get them later.” Phil said.
Tommy nodded, even though Phil couldn’t see him.
Phil opened the door, stepping inside with Tommy.
“Boys! Come here please!” He called.
Tommy looked around the room.
It was a cozy living room, with a fireplace on one wall, a TV above it. There was a long couch, covered in blankets and the like. A bookshelf stood in the corner, filled with books. Tommy could see a hallway leading away, a staircase curling upwards just outside the living room door.
Tommy heard a gasp.
“Oh sunshine, that’s why you were crying.”
The man from before, the one with brown wings, stood a few feet away, sadness on his face.
Phil turned to him.
“Wait, Wil, this was the kid who cried?”
Wil chirped, a sound of distress as he surged forward to wrap Tommy in a hug.
Tommy let go of Phil’s hand, melting into the hug.
Tommy chirped, trying to say that it was fine, Wil hadn’t known-
Wil sighed.
“Sunshine, I should’ve realized.”
He twisted to look at Phil.
“He had his wings under a coat, I didn’t know, Dad.”
Phil’s wings dropped, Tommy realizing they had been puffed up.
“Sorry, I just- You know.”
Wil nodded, pulling his dad into the hug.
Tommy eyes were watering again.
Wil and Phil wanted him, oh-
“Dad, what’s-“
The man with the pink wings came down the staircase, freezing when he saw Tommy.
“Oh.”
Wil gave the man a smile, something about it sad.
“He’s the kid who cried at my song a month ago.”
“I found him at the store, he was chirped at me.” Phil added.
The man sighed.
“I bumped into him. Literally, a few months ago.”
Wil looked at him, a pleading look on his face.
“Tech, come here-!”
Tech walked forward, throwing his arms around the three of them.
Phil gave a distressed chirp.
“He- We all ran into him? Tommy, did you have a flock then-?”
Tommy sobbed, unable to hold back his tears anymore.
Wil squeezed him tighter, Tech running a hand over Tommy’s hair.
“I didn’t-“ He hiccupped.
“I haven’t had one since I was a baby.”
All three of their faces dropped at that, shock, horror and sadness overtaking them.
“Oh sunshine, oh darling-“
Wil looked at his dad.
“I don’t- Dad you have to-“
Phil crooned, trying to calm all three of them down.
“don’t worry don’t worry caretaker is here”
They all relaxed at that.
Tommy chirped out a ‘I know I know safe with caretaker safe’
Phil smiled at him, before he carefully shooed his sons away from Tommy, picking him up.
“Come on, we’re going to the nest.”
Wil and Tech nodded, both of them focused entirely on Tommy.
Tommy flushed.
He wasn’t used to this.
Phil hummed as he carried Tommy upstairs, Tech and Wil trailing behind them.
He pushed open a door, revealing the nest.
It was so much better than Tommy’s bad imitation.
A wide nest of blankets and pillows in the middle of the room, curtains drawn to keep the room dim and quiet. It was big enough for a flock, carefully constructed to hold them perfectly.
Tommy wanted it so bad.
Phil gave a flap of his wings, propelling them into the nest.
Tommy’s instincts finally, finally realized that this was for real, that he had a flock.
He had a flock.
Finally.
Phil set Tommy down, quickly curling one of his wings over him.
It only took a moment for Wil and Tech to join them.
Wil laid down next to Tommy, cuddling into his side.
Tech put a wing over Phil’s.
It was perfect.
So, so perfect.
Tommy smiled.
Phil looked at him, a wide smile on his face.
“Welcome home, son.”
Tommy could feel himself drifting off to sleep, feeling completely safe.
“Thanks, Dad.” He mumbled, before falling asleep, curled up with his family.
He didn’t ache anymore.
He just slept, warm and protected and loved.