Work Text:
Toya was acting different.
Not bad, just different than usual.
He seemed infinitely more comfortable in his skin. His hands didn’t jolt every time someone touched him. Most importantly, he was smiling more, even laughing freely.
Akito had noticed very quickly. Then An, then Kohane, who seemed a bit mystified by the change; she’d always seemed just a little intimidated by Toya, due to his poker face as much as his height. But it was a very welcome change to his usual attitude. He still wasn’t entirely comfortable, it seemed, but letting himself go this far was a good sign.
Now, waiting in the wings of a live house, he was exchanging encouraging words with Kohane. Their partners watched on fondly; though Toya wasn’t smiling, his eyes were shining at Kohane’s determination. The girl was excitedly squeaking out affirmations. The nervousness in her voice became less noticeable with every word she spoke, and the way Toya nodded to every one. An turned to them. “Guys, we’re up! Let’s do this!”
The group nodded at one another and briskly walked onto the stage. The set passed quickly, almost in a blur, but Akito’s eyes were glued to Toya through every song. He looked… happy. This was probably the most openly Toya had ever shown his joy, as far as Akito had seen. And he was doing it in front of An and Kohane, in front of a crowd. Through the speakers, his voice rang out clearly, tinged with emotion in a way Akito had never heard before. His smile was audible in his singing. It only served to make his voice more beautiful. His movements, too, were different; free, as if the air around him had thinned, allowing him to move smoothly through the choreography.
Toya was stunning.
That sentiment was quickly made known as soon as the group left the stage.
“Toya, dude, where have you been hiding that this whole time?!”
“Aoyagi-kun, that was amazing!”
“Oh my gosh, Toya, you sounded so insanely good up there!!”
All three of them were quickly piling in compliments and questions. An made a somewhat cheeky remark about secret training. Kohane’s eyes glittered in the dim backstage lights, filled with pure admiration. Akito felt like he had been rendered speechless, but somehow managed to spill out his feelings about the performance.
And Toya just… stared.
His eyes were wide, mouth slightly parted as he continued to catch his breath. He was unreadable again. After a beat too long without a response, the three of them quieted. Akito was the first to speak. “Hey, Toya, you okay..?”
Another moment of just breathing. Tears brimming in Toya’s eyes. Then…
“Ah- Aoyagi-kun!”
Oh.
Toya was hugging them.
Not just Akito. All three of them, held firmly in the taller boy’s arms, pulled to his chest as much as he could. Still no words spoken, but Toya’s hiccups and squeaks and hums were perfectly audible in the huddle. He was crying.
“Hey, hey, Toya.”
Usually, Toya’s post-show routine was a high-five for An and Kohane and a brief hug for Akito. On good days, the hug would extend into Akito’s arm staying looped around Toya’s neck; on bad days, the hug was reduced to just another high-five. Toya had never been big on physical affection, and it had taken years for Akito to break his walls down enough for what they already did. This was unexpected.
Akito wanted to pull away from the hug, to make sure that his partner was okay. But when he tried, Toya’s grip tightened, causing all three to yelp. Thankfully, they seemed to get the message, and arms quickly wrapped around Toya’s shoulders and back as he was hugged back. A shared happiness buzzed between the group. Minutes passed, and none of the three victims had the willpower to move.
Eventually, An took initiative.
“Okay, Toya, can you let us go?”
A head shake against them. Akito huffed out a laugh. “Toya, we can hug you again later, but we need to stop crowding backstage. There are still other performers here.”
The taller boy whined, but after a few moments he gave in and loosened his grip, allowing the other three to move back. Now, they could see Toya’s face; the bright smile plastered across it, the faint reflection of tears on his cheeks, his sparkling silver eyes. Akito could get lost in that expression. Before he did, he murmured reassuringly to Kohane, who seemed a little confused on what was going on. “‘S okay, Koha, he’s fine.” Looking to Toya for confirmation, the taller boy nodded quickly.
An smiled. “Right, Toya, let's go outside, ‘kay?”
Once again, he nodded, and an understanding settled over the group. Toya couldn’t properly speak.
After a quick trip to collect bags and coats, the four of them made their way out to an alley behind the live house, Toya still clinging to his partner’s hand as they moved. When they made it outside, Toya sat on the steps with his legs pulled up, and after a moment began gently rocking back and forth, tapping his fingers against his knees. Fondness gripped Akito's heart. “You overwhelmed?”
Toya nodded. “Happy.” The word came out as a mumble, though it wasn’t really needed given the smile still planted on his face.
Kohane was quick to step forward. “Do you want your headphones?”
Toya nodded, and after a moment she’d fished them out of his bag and placed them over his head. He adjusted them for a moment, before burying his head in his knees and letting out a shrill whine. The rest of the group smiled. It was a very distinct Toya happy sound.
After a few minutes, Toya seemed to have collected himself, enough to look up at the group and whisper, “Thank you.”
Akito chuckled. “What’re you thanking us for, Toya? You’re the one who completely wiped the floor out there.”
“Just…” Toya paused, waving his hands around a little, trying to articulate his feelings in a way that didn’t break his fragile brain. “This.”
An smiled, leaning down towards him. “You mean us?”
A nod. An laughed a little. “You’re thanking us for being here?”
Toya nodded again. He opened his mouth, but the words wouldn’t come. He hummed. Kohane understood, and passed over his phone from where she was still perched beside his bag. His fingers fumbled as he typed.
‘For everything. For being here, for helping me, for not judging me, for being happy for me. I’m happy. I’ve never felt this loved before.’
All three of them paused. Toya wasn’t usually that open. He wasn’t usually that sweet.
“Aoyagi-kun… You don’t need to thank us for loving you.”
An and Akito were both a little surprised that Kohane was the first to respond. But that didn’t really matter. An smiled. “Yeah, Toya. We’re here because you’re amazing. If anything, you should be thanking yourself!”
Akito settled beside his partner, smiling softly. “D’you want another hug, Toya?”
Frantic nodding.
The three of them quickly swooped in. Kohane was the smallest, and so quickly ended up in the middle, pressed near Toya’s chest. Akito was on one side, nuzzling into the crook of Toya’s neck, arms wrapped around Kohane and the taller boy’s back. An grinned and jumped on top, sitting up so that she somehow managed to touch all three of them. Toya let out another happy whine.
They all would have been happy to stay like that forever, if it weren’t for the uncomfortable concrete step they were perched upon. Kohane took the initiative this time, nudging her forehead against Toya’s chest. “Should we go to Weekend Garage? You probably don’t wanna go home yet, I assume.”
Toya nodded, and after a final (stronger than necessary) squeeze, the four separated. Akito helped his partner up, entirely unsurprised by the way Toya squeezed his hand as if his life depended on it. Bags were collected quickly, and they set off. The night air was refreshing. Toya inhaled deeply, for once allowing himself to simply feel and experience the world around him without a second thought. He felt Akito’s hand in his. The way Kohane’s shoulder occasionally brushed against him. Noticed how An’s hair accessories glinted in the dim lights. He breathed. The cold was relaxing.
“So, Aoyagi-kun…” Kohane’s voice was quiet, and she glanced at him as if asking permission. Toya cocked his head. “I was wondering if anything bought that on. You’ve never seemed that fond of me or An-chan touching you, so…”
Toya hummed, and glancing over Kohane, An’s eyes were twinkling with curiosity too. He thought. Why did he hug them? Kohane was right about him avoiding physical contact with people other than Akito. He was perfectly comfortable around the girls by now, but something seemed to push him away from touching them. And tonight, that something had dissipated entirely. It was gone, leaving pure affection, and a desire to show that, to share the joy bubbling in his chest. So he did.
“I think…” Toya’s voice was barely more than a whisper. “Just felt right.”
An smiled brightly. “I’m glad! It made me really happy.”
Kohane squeaked in agreement, beaming at him, and Akito’s hand tightened around Toya’s. Once again, there was a shrill squeal of joy.
“I love you guys.”