Chapter Text
Hage-baka: Baldy moron
Poni-boke: Stupid-pony. (A nickname combining pony-tail and the usual insult. Also, boke has more than one meaning.)
"Morning, hage-baka."
"Morning, poni-boke. And I'm not bald!"
"Shut up, you're already wasting minutes of my opening time," The black haired woman can't help but smile, seeing her friend who is yawning, his hands stuffed in his red jogger's jacket , his black hair slightly tussled around as a bed head, "Did you really place in any effort to waking up early, Saitama?"
"Ha ha. Unlike you, I can't wake up because I did a marathon of watching my shows." Saitama's eyes narrow in a mix of irritation and amusement- the typical banter between him and his friend Kaori Namikawa, "But no, you had to remind me that I owed you errands."
"Well, yeah, you do, though this might help with your 'daily routine'," She hands him a list, which he gingerly takes, "Hopefully... this should take you about half the day."
"Hm." Saitama's eyes roams through the neatly written points of what she wants him to do-
- Get saline solution, gloves, popsicle sticks from med supply store. Money's in the envelope, taped behind the letter. Simple, that's over in G-City. There's this really nice clerk over there that knows him too well, he'll just complain about the sadist doctor to her and maybe get her number?
- Get test results from the usual biotest/hospital area from D-City. PLEASE DO NOT BURN THE PAPERS, I WILL KILL YOU REGARDLESS OF HOW IT GOT BURNED. His eyes twitched at that- for the last effing time, it was from that stupid as hell monster that shot fire through- never mind, he can see Kaori's glare at him from that reaction.
- Get the other set of test results from N-City. Read last statement from above. This also includes the papers being soaked, torn up, or lost in any sort of form or way. Saitama just knows Kaori can give two-cents shit about what happens out there, huh? Well, maybe for those being hurt and lost and everything else except for what monster of the week caused her papers to get destroyed- but really, she's a bit more anal about those test results...
- As usual, turn on that bracelet for monitoring your usual rates, keep me noted of any odd occurrences, and anything else odd in your body while you do your hellish workout, let me know.
Saitama looks up from the paper with a deadpan glare, "...just three?"
"Three." Kaori arches her thin eyebrow back, "I'm not trusting you with those blood samples."
"I told you that was from that stupid large creature from H-City!"
"I know, you beat it with that one punch, but it drank those samples hence why you couldn't get it in and I had to deliver it myself," Kaori sighs heavily, "Really, at this rate, this nation is rampant with monsters. I don't get it."
"Me neither." Saitama then pauses, "Wait, what if I get-" A bottle of water was thrown at his face, but with his quick reflexes, he catches it on time.
"Hydration is important, well, you know that drivel," The doctor gives him a grin before frowning, "Though- are you sure you're going to continue with that '100' workout routine- even after you manage to..." She pauses, "One punch everything?"
Saitama sighs- more heavily and defeated, "Yeah. Look- it's nothing for me- seeing as how I wanted to do it for myself."
"You mean by pushing your body to the most inhuman of limits I've seen when you came to me, asking to pick you up for lunch," Kaori shakes her head, "I still remembered when your body was aching to no end. And now- well, let's just say I'm surprised you can heal pretty damn fast."
"What do you expect?" Saitama shrugs before looking at his watch, "Oh, hey... maybe I should head out."
"Make sure not to run into trains or anything stupid of the sort," Kaori shakes her head, walking over to let him out before allowing him to start running, "Oh yeah- Saitama?"
"Hm?" He sees her indicating his small black band, causing him to blink before he glares at her, "Oh. ...really?"
"Do it or no udon for lunch today," She smirks, hearing a groan from him, "Good luck, baka hage!"
She hears a loud groan, "I AM NOT BALD, PONI-BOKE!!!"
She manages to quirk a small laugh before shutting the door, flipping the sigh to 'open' for the clinic, "Well, you might've been. Then I would've called you worse ones."
For as long as Saitama can recall, he wasn't really exactly motivated to do... actually, lots of things as a child. His parents raised him in the best of their ways, he was ordinary enough to do well for his school, grades were decent, he has a few people here that he talks to... despite his less than better life (and honestly, who can blame him? His parents did their best, he might as well do that too). He had only one friend that stuck with him- Takeshi (if Saitama recalled, he always liked to ride on his bicycle a lot)- before said guy moved away in middle school. Kaori befriended him in high school when he actually accomplished going to a better one- and they got along... with insults to the highest degree. (He did recall one time a student asked if the two were dating. The results to that were laughter from both of them before deadpanning 'No.' at the same time.)
He did make good memories- one of them was he usually went to the park and studied where he met a boy about about six years younger than him. The boy was a reasonable, happy... yet serious person who Saitama saw was alone on the park, waiting for his parents to pick him up. He had talked to the child, who was surprised from Saitama talking to him. That is, before the boy asked lots of questions, and for once, Saitama felt like he has... some answers (due to his 'dedication to study' moments) to respond. That happened for some time for an entire good few years, until Saitama graduated from high school. The boy- if he recalled, also made a few friends along the way and Saitama was relieved- and sad at the same time- to see the boy moved on from talking to him- a high schooler who may or may not have a future paved for him.
(Yet he doesn't realize that same boy is still looking for him for a long time.)
He also knew his life was aimed to be a salaryman- a better life than his parents, but he was turned down for so many jobs- even after a few successful ones that eventually got him into trouble with the last one... that was actually legit reasonable on his end, terrible for the ones who wanted to stay at the company (to be fair, that boss of his was too corrupt. And he was bound to get caught sooner or later). His parents did pass away at a reasonable age when he was beginning to get independent (around nineteen, he did recall getting upset to the point where some of the people actually helped him move on- along with Ms. Yukawa, who offered him home for the next few years- and Kaori, who did help him get better and making sure he was okay).
But really, that wasn't the reason why he went on his '100' routine.
It was after he was about to fall into that same spiral of depression that he saved a child's life. From some crab monster- he didn't recall exactly. All he knew was afterwards, he has a strange spark to get stronger- to be... a hero? No way. A hero wouldn't do or think this on a stupidly drastic whim, right?
Maybe just being stronger to protect people like that child would do for him.
(Now that he thinks about it, that child looked hilarious to begin with, that huge chin and all...)
That, and afterwards, he went to the first local clinic- which was owned and ran by Kaori. She was surprised at his appearance, more over by his injury before asking what happened. After explaining everything along with his new turn in life, Kaori has patched Saitama up before doing what he knows is typical of her.
She flicked his head, deadpanning, "One, that's really stupid. Two, really? They're still not over your boss' corrupt crap?"
Saitama was ready to talk back before Kaori sighs, "And three, if you really want to start getting strong, you obviously have to start with a routine. And I can give you a few things in mind- though just to be clear, you also might want to come here for the typical physical. Just so I can keep track if you're okay in the day."
Well. That was surprising.
At least he got a supporter. (If he counts one biting and slightly sadistic doctor as one, sure, why not? Better than nothing.)
Kaori was a local doctor- well, more of a private practice than public. She owns her own clinic and Saitama frequents it just so she doesn't seem lonely at times (like he usually is when he comes home, but he's used to it to notice anything). She's also the one who helps him medically and health-wise, along with the fact (or unfortunately for him) that she was one of the very few people in high school that got along with him.
It might've not helped that she was the first to balk at his '100' routine. But after seeing he's not going to give up on that she relents, only responding, "If your body does decide to break down, though, seriously, rest. The body needs to recover- especially after you defeated some monstrosity while running 10 fucking kilos a DAY!"
"Oh shut up!" Saitama retorts back, bandages covering at least some part of his body because at least one time, some idiotic monster shows up in the midst of his workout and forces him to take the monster on, "There was a good sale going on at the time over at the market that I couldn't miss!"
"...Seriously?"
"Not to mention I already did the other 100 situps, 100 pushups, 100 squats..."
"What's next?" She's grumbling, "100 lunges? 100 jumping-jacks?"
"That sounds like a good idea-" Saitama can't help but muse, causing her to groan in disdain, muttering something about 'What's next? Being immune to pain?' "...what?"
"...I get this really good feeling talking you out of this routine will be moot." Kaori dryly flips him off casually before going to another room to treat her patient, who thankfully didn't hear their banter.
At least she gives him free food everyday- water bottles are also a must for him. (He likes freebies, anything wrong with that?). And she does watch over him, which is another good thing. But this was only for the first half of the day. After work is over and all, it's just him in his apartment in Z-City. Really, Saitama doesn't mind the loneliness. At all.
So... why does today feel somewhat different?
He can feel the wind rushing through his hair as he makes a few dashes towards the entrance of G-City, people seeing a man with black-hair jogging through, with a paper in his hand.
Yup, this is just normal. Maybe, after they get lunch, Kaori might let him off early- he has been meaning to watch the ending to that new series he's been marathoning all last night on.
Saitama lets out a small content smile escape him, dodging one of the few civilians in the street in time, "Just a typical day, a normal day where nothing can go-"
A loud scream, crashes later, and then Saitama realizes a couple of meters front and above him, there was a purple humanoid with an antennae, ranting something about humanity being a plague and he is there to vaccinate Earth from it.
The black-haired jogger groans as he hears people to get out of the way, you'll be crushed.
"-wrong. ...great."
Okay, maybe the monsters appearing in any city is also typical.
This really says something about his luck, huh?
The med supply store can wait for a few minutes.
"Don't tell me." Kaori's slight ire voice comes through as Saitama dialed her number not too long ago (after punching that 'Vaccine Man' with one punch, he's in absolutely no mood for a long-ass speech again since he's on an errand run- and there's the issue he's calling about in the midst of the rubble), "There's a supply missing."
"Oh, no, I got all the crap you needed-" He double-checks to make sure: gloves, saline solution, and popsicle sticks for tongue checking. He also decided for his sanity's sake to also get more empty and sterile vials- so she won't bug him about it later, "Also threw in a few vials for sanity's sake."
"...ah, so I'll check it off vials for the next trip then. Why are you calling?"
"There's a brat injured," Saitama is looking down at the bawling brunette girl, who is clinging to his jogger's jacket. Her knee is bloodied from her tripping, but she was crying for her mom, "And looking for her mom."
"Oh. Let me guess. Monster attack."
"Yup." He's running now, still holding onto the child as she gasps over how he's able to run fast and leap over buildings while wearing a jogger's suit. The med supplies are still in his left hand along with the changes stuffed in his pocket, "Said he was going to wipe away humanity since we were Earth's parasites."
"...that's a pretty lame reason for a monster to show up. Any ID on the mom or dad of the girl you're talking about?"
"Nope."
"...you're not scaring her with your running, are you."
"Nope, just practice for any future sale grocery shopping." Saitama hears the girl squeak in surprises as he lands on the rooftop (carefully) before shooting the child a grin, "Are you okay?"
"Wow, you're fast!" The girl manages to forget about her predicament to marvel over Saitama's super speed and agility, "Are you a hero?"
"Nope, just training to get stronger," Saitama responds, knowing he's close to the clinic before he grins widely, "I can jump over three buildings with a single bound, you know."
"Really??" The brunette gasps with awe.
"Good God, hage baka, you're beginning to sound lamer than that monster you just told me about." His eye twitched at Kaori's sudden dry comment, "And are you talking with a cellphone at your hand?"
"I'm not bald, I'm about to approach your clinic, and yes, I have a cellphone at hand."
"...okay, getting the door opened before you slam into it by accident." Her voice is heavy with concern before a sigh escapes her. He hears the door creak open, "Okay, get the girl here, I'll treat her and try to get information regarding contacting her parents."
"Thanks." Not that he'll admit, he's really concerned the girl can get back to her family. He manages to see her looking up at him with watery eyes before flashing a small grin, indicating everything will be okay, "Some damages in G-City, so I'm pretty sure the hospital will be full."
"Meaning, I"ll be getting in patients mostly from G-City today."
"Yeah. Maybe more." He arrives just in time to see the clinic- the girl now talking over how she was amazed at how fast that went before handing the injured girl to Kaori, who clicks her tongue at seeing the injured girl's knee. He hangs up his phone, "She tripped in the rubble."
"Thanks. I'll take care of her wounds from here." Kaori nods before taking the bag, cellphone shut on her end, "Med supplies?"
"Yup. Need the change?"
"Nah. Get yourself something for the trouble with the monster- a change of clothing to your lame Oppai shirt?" Kaori smirks.
"HEY! It's a nice shirt!" He sees the girl looking at the two, very confused before grinning, "Sorry. Nee-chan and I are like that."
"It's okay," The girl nods brightly before chirping, "Thank you, Onii-chan! I'll remember you!"
There's a part of Saitama that warms up to that comment. He can't help but grin at that- saving lives is something he wants to do, but not as one of those heroes he sees dressed up in the streets recently. (Because he really... doesn't see himself like that, for some reason.)
"Thanks for the influx heads up, Saitama." Kaori nods before taking out the first boxes of gloves (he bought five packs, that was frigging expensive as hell! For gloves!?) to place over her hands, "Though I'll keep the girl at special treatment- I'll call you for her parents' name so prepare yourself to the trip to the polics station soon." She tosses him another water bottle, but Saitama can tell she really is going to prepare herself for several long days at the clinic. "Long day?"
"Long day." She then pauses, "I'm still buying lunch for the people in here, you know."
"Oh," Saitama cheekily smirks, "Meaning for me too?"
This time the second water bottle is aimed at his head and he barely had time to dodge that before watching it, "Errands, hage baka?"
His face drops to one of groaning as he recalls the other two items on the list before leaving the door, "And if they do get-"
"Remember the warning, heed it well, otherwise, I will burn that manga collection of yours," Kaori calmly deadpans, hearing the door shut. She rolls her eyes before placing on her stethoscope and facing the girl, "Okay, let me check your heartbeat..."
To D-City, then.
Well, this outta be fun, right?
Saitama was running at a faster pace- rather, he would like to get to the lab safe and sound without burning those damn papers without having her murdering him later. Sighing, he takes a small stop before drinking water- man, was he parched.
He sees a couple of civilians walking around before he realizes it was about ten in the morning. No monsters... yet.
Speaking of, why have they been appearing more aggressively than usual? Saitama frowns to himself before resuming his jog, making sure to recycle the empty water bottle before running towards the lab area in D-City.
It was quiet, calm when he got the results from a very a patient receptionist and a representative, clamoring about the doctor he's working for and how come she doesn't get to see them often (to which Saitama responds without trying to smoosh all murderous thoughts of the sadist of a doctor who sent him here that she's been treating him well in turn for having to do all the work).
It wasn't that when he exits out of the building before he's about to head towards N-City for the second batch of results.
Saitama stops to hear a series of screams and people running- just in time to see a very grotesquely muscled colossal man, walking all over what seems to be a part of an abandoned part of what used to be V-City while hearing low rumbles that sounded like a casual conversation to someone- on his shoulder (Saitama sees a very nerdy looking man with glasses and a somewhat bowled haircut, clamoring over how they are going to take over the cities with his younger-stronger inspired brother that he gave an experimental drug to).
Oh.
"Guess I have no choice, huh." Saitama really can't tell whether or not the monsters are headed in his direction on purpose ot karma just really loves to screw him over that much. Also, that reminds him a bit about how he got his power. He frowns a bit as he tucks the paper inside of his jogger's uniform, holding another copy at hand before dashing over to begin his ascent to stop Collosal Titan-Wannabe before the day gets- well, progressively worse.
(It might not help this could be a fast track to N-City, seeing how it was on the giant's direction...)
It was one day Saitama noticed something was off.
Well, one, his hair was still in tact.
Two, so are his limbs and face and... everything.
Three, so is his head.
So, what was the matter? Like he has the burn to...
...damn, what was it?
"You want me," Kaori slowly asks if Saitama was dimwitted when they were eating at the usual udon place, "To check if anything is wrong with you."
Saitama nods.
"Saitama."
"Yeah?"
Kaori deadpans, "What were you smoking before you got here?"
"I don't take drugs, dammit!" The black-haired man is annoyed at this, "I'm serious! I feel something is really off! I don't know what, but... argh, this is too troublesome!"
"Fine, fine, shut up for a minute, be glad I'm on lunch duty out of all times," The doctor sighs before finishing her meal (how she stays skinny is beyond him. ...then again, the same for him as he polishes off the last of his second helping of udon) and paying the bill (Free food is always a good thing for Saitama), "Okay, if you're that worried, tell me something. Is your temperature fine?"
"You mean... I feel the same as ever." Saitama is confused, "What do you want me to say? My head is fine, my hair is still there-" He yanks at it before wincing, "My body's in tact."
"You mean ripped like usual, okay," Kaori nods, "Heartbeat?"
"Normal."
(He's not that stupid to know the terms she's asking.)
"Limbs?"
"Not aching anymore, thank you very much."
"Anything else?"
"Well," Saitama pauses, "Earlier I thought I heard a bug in the apartment, so I just tried to slam it with my hands. Though the only thing I'm worried about now is this huge as hell crack I left on the wall-" That catches her attention, "-but I mean, that's... really it."
"Hmn." Kaori frowns a bit before checking the time, "...okay, so we got about an hour left."
"An hour?" Saitama's lost. What is she planning? (His feeling always chalks up to dread when it came to her. Not in a good way, either.) He sees her standing up before indicating to him to the door, "Hey, what are we-"
"There's a boxing gym over in a couple of blocks, a friend over there owes me, might as well take advantage of it," She explains, "I want to see something."
"O... kay?"
Their walk over there lasted about twenty minutes, the talk with her friend lasted about five minutes.
The walk to the room where many boxers are beating up punching bags wasn't too long. What Saitama was lost on was when the doctor walks him up to one of the punching bags- one that has barely been used for a long time.
"What... are we doing?" Saitama warily asks her.
"An impulsive hypothesis just came to mind, so I want you to try something for me," Kaori indicates to the bag, "The last time someone punched this bag, his fists were damaged because someone sabotaged this bag by placing a metal plate inside of the bag just so he can have an advantage over his opponents. Over here," She points to the center area, "That's where the metal plate is." She then pauses nonplussed, seeing his clueless expression, "Punch the bag."
Saitama stares at her, bug-eyes and obviously- in pretty much horror before exclaiming, "ARE YOU FUCKING JOKING, YOU SCHADENFREUDIC QUACK!?"
Well, that caught a lot of people's attention.
"Nope. Going to get back at you for that quack remark since I actually treat people, thank you." Kaori responds, looking a tad bit bored.
"My hand might hurt- I haven't even tried getting to do 100 air punches a day!!"
"Well, you are, so get used to it," She deadpans, "So-"
"And you're not considering the possible limb loss!?" Saitama is incredulous at this as typical, "What sort of theory are you trying out here-"
"Saitama." Kaori glares at him, "Are we really going to waste time or are you going to punch the bag?"
His dark brown eyes are twitching, mentally plotting how to get back at her (maybe hiding her precious art mini model somewhere high would do) before he grips his right hand, mentally hoping to whatever deity exists will try to at least keep his hand in tact for this Darwinian deed.
Then he punches the sabotaged bag.
Whatever happened next would be described by some as unbelievable, most as shocked astonishment as there was a crowd that gathered around him and the doctor.
Kaori just smirks.
Saitama, on the other hand, looks surprised to see his hand is still there, not injured or bruised. (Though if one looks pretty carefully, there is some cotton stuck on his hand.)
The metallic plated punching bag had been fully decimated, not to mention causing a very good sized hole in the gym. There was also a crowd outside where the ruined bag was- well, along with that very well imprinted punch mark on the thick metallic plate. Puffs of cotton were strewn all over the street, fabric shredded all over the sidewalk.
Though the attention was gaped over at Saitama in alarm before hearing a clamor of exclamation from the boxers, trainers, the owner (who was forewarned by Kaori in advance along with a check for a very surprising amount- hence his shock when he sees that one irritating punching bag destroyed by just one frigging punch).
Saitama just stares at his fist before exclaiming in genuine shock, "I- What-"
"Well, that's one theory somewhat confirmed," Kaori shrugs, glancing over at the damages done, nodding to the owner, "Thanks. Think that'll do?"
"S-Sure-" The owner nods, still looking at Saitama in shock before the two made their quick escape from the crowds that began showing up.
A few minutes later after shocked silence, back in the clinic, Saitama asks in shock, "What- I mean- WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT!"
"Somehow, your stupid as hell '100' training regiment made you ungodly overpowered. Meaning your strength somehow multiplied." Kaori hums as she begins to write out prescriptions for an incoming patient, "How did it feel, punching that bag?"
"Huh? Well," Saitama frowns, "Honestly... it really didn't feel like anything. Just- felt like punching air."
"Meaning that wasn't the fullest of your power?"
"...no?" Saitama manages to respond with a degree of uncertainty, "...why?"
"Just curious," And suddenly a black band hits his face, causing Saitama to squawk, about to ask her what in God's name was the item he just gave her- "Fitness band." She doesn't look up at him, but she turns the laptop over for Saitama to see, "It's a mini-monitor for your body: heart, breathing rate, miles ran or walked, also records time and temp of the day. And there's a GPS attached to it in case you decide to get drunk one night and lose your way home."
"How... thoughtful," Saitama dryly deadpans, placing the bracelet on his left wrist, "Bet it was pricey."
"It was, I don't use it, so you'll be the butt monkey that uses it," Kaori glances to him, "And besides, shouldn't there be something to let you know if you're still normal asides your overpowered abilities?"
The black-haired man looks back down at the fitness band before pressing on one of the buttons, asking for his age and weight.
"...that'll be nice."
"Oh, and one other thing," Kaori goes back to writing prescriptions, "You wreck it, you're buying the other one. I'm not going to clean up your mess, hage-baka."
"ARE YOU SHITTING ME!? AND I'M NOT BALD!"
That was about a year and half in his training regimen.
And now?
Saitama is pretty damn bored.
Well, those papers that are stuffed in his jacket really doesn't help the comfort level at the moment. Those copies are still in his hand. Now he's itching to open that seal and read it because whatever blah blah blah speech the nerdy man is harping on is boring him.
That- and oh yeah- he can punch everything with one single punch. That's boring him more. (Him wearing his jogger's uniform right now doesn't exactly help either. No wonder he's been pestering Kaori for errands.)
...he's just waiting until he reaches the outer parts of N-City to grab his stuff for the last errand and then get back to the clinic.
That and he can see B-City being abandoned just at the meer sight of the colossal titan wannabe. Though he can't help but wince over the damages done- well, shit, whoever is going to rebuild the city is going to have a grand time, aren't they?
He hears the man laughing before Saitama lets out a bored sigh.
So, he's guessing Kaori hasn't gotten the girl to tell her name yet?
"Ahahaha- GAAH- BROTHER!" Saitama now wishes he isn't hearing that man's slight screeching voice, "Brother, someone else is on your shoulder!"
The colossal stops his rampage just when he heard that.
Saitama blinks, before processing that the guy is talking about him.
"Oh. Yeah." Saitama frowns, noticing something before cringing, "...come on, dude, at least tell wannabe titan to put some pants on."
Though he doesn't even hear anything else due to hearing the scathing voice yelling to kill the man on the shoulder now, now now-
-to only hear a small splat before Saitama blinks, seeing the giant look at his left hand- before letting out a loud cry that sounded like an incoherent
"BROOOOOOOOOOOOTTTTTTHEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRR!!" (or in Saitama's case since he immediately plugged his ears, a hippo that just went into heat. In not in a good way.)
Too loud... Saitama sideways glanced away from the man just in time to see B-City fully evacuated. Well, good, no casualties on the city's end-
"NOOOO WHY DID IT COME TO THIS? I JUST WANTED MORE POWER, BUT WHY DID THIS HAVE TO HAPPEN! I JUST WANNA BE THE STRONGEST- HAVE THE MOST POWER!!!"
"Yeah, it's pretty damn boring," Saitama deadpans, unplugging his ears to glance over just before feeling snatched and held in a fist by the collosal man, "So, what now?"
"I DON'T CARE, YOU'RE RESPONSIBLE FOR KILLING MY BROTHER-"
Isn't that you? Saitama wants to smack his hand against his head, but nope, his arms are stuck between him at the moment due to the-
"SO DIE ALREADY!!!" Then he was thrown into what is now an abandoned part of B-City, causing a large crater from the sheer strength needed to toss Saitama out.
Said guy, on the other hand, just groans, feeling practically- oh, well, at least his cellphone isn't busted. Along with the band.
"Sir!!!"
...wait, seriously!? There are still people in this wreck!?
Saitama looks in surprise to see a family, hiding in the city before the father running to Saitama, "Sir! What- Are you-"
"I'm fine," Saitama brushes the debris out of his hair, and then his back before frowning, "You should leave."
"I know, but my wife is supposed to give birth today- her water just broke!!" Oh GOD, was this- okay, not a joke, apparently since he sees the wife worried over both men (which makes Saitama wonder- how the hell are they still present in B-City despite the looming monster of doom present!?) while gasping at the same time, her son holding onto her hand in worry, "And there's no working car in the city-"
"So you need a hospital?" Saitama was about to ask when he sees the monster trying to punch them- before he takes the husband, wife, and son before dashing them as fast as possible to a very working car- just in time to dodge the large punches the titan was throwing at the former area, "My friend has a clinic in Y-City- local one too- it has a blue cross on it. She also helps with giving birth."
(He knows she had experience in aiding in birth-giving... once. Ah well, practice makes perfect, right?)
"Y-Yeah!" The teenage son nods frantically as he starts the car for his father to get in, "Got it!"
"Thank you so much!" The wife gasps in relief, the son beaming in awe, as the husband flashes him a grateful smile before the car goes off in high speed towards Y-City. The black-haired man sighs in relief, seeing them out of distance before turning back to see the giant decimating the city before stopping, mumbling something that hits Saitama.
"SO WHAT IF I'M THE STRONGEST? ...IT FEELS EMPTY INSIDE."
"Yeah, so you know that too?" He jumps high up to the horror of the monster before Saitama punches him- straight in the cheek, "Honestly, I thought having absolute power is a good thing, but... it's boring. Not surprised-"
His ringtone surprises him, causing Saitama to groan before taking out the phone, "Okay, what? I'm in the middle of beating up something!"
"With that one punch again?" Kaori's voice asks, "So, papers-"
"Not damaged and before you say anything, there is nothing about the papers being crinkled!" At least he was smart enough to ask for two back at N-City, one for him to hold onto, the other to- wait, where were the other copy?
"OH SHIT, THE PAPERS-" He stops, feeling a slight crinckle hidden in his jacket before heaving a sigh of relief, "Oh whew. Still in tact-" Then he stops, looking down at the now ruined... actually, wait.
"Ah." Saitama blinks, "...um."
"...okay, did you really get the-"
"It's in my jacket." Saitama quickly responds, wanting not to be there for the damage crew to show up.
"Oh. The girl's name is Homura Maki, by the way. So you should make a pit stop to the police station on the way to see if Homura Maki's parents are searching for her."
"Ah. Got it." One more errand on his list, "How's the clinic?"
"You were right, some people from G-City are coming here, and now I'm seeing some from another city for some reason," Kaori pauses, "...let me guess. Monster showed up."
"Yeah." Saitama groans, running his hand through his hair, "Is it possible for me to point out how much I'm loving home more and more?"
"Ha. No. Let me know when you get the papers and go to the police station." Saitama hears the click at the end, signaling the end of the call.
So he turns around and jogs his way to the shortest path to N-City for the last set of papers, the ruins of B-City behind him. Though his mind is also tracking down a good police office to search for the parents of one Homura Maki.
God, this is going to be a long day ahead of him.
"B-City is officially destroyed by the Biceps King," A man in the suit groans before tapping in a few sentences, "Should we begin reconstruction for the entire city?"
"Not yet," Another official pauses, "Let's wait to see if people decide to move towards the other ones."
"I see." The third official types something before showing the image of the purple-alien man, "Vaccine Man is destroyed- all of the heroes reported having no sight of him when they went to the place he was supposed to be."
"Strange," A blonde man with glasses frowns, glancing over to the city, "I thought something with that high of a threat would be hard to take on, even for an S-Class."
Just who took them on?
The back door to the clinic opens, Saitama coming in after the police station. It was about to hit noon.
"Back." He calls out, taking the water bottle with the dent in it, "Police line was long, but the parents have been contacted, so they're on the way. Oh, I got the test results you wanted."
"Thanks. Not surprised to hear about the line, figures you might've suffered from boredom there." Kaori doesn't bother to ask about his slightly dirtied state (not that it matters- he's healing pretty well), nor does she notice his eyes twitching at her nonchalant comment, "So I heard B-City got destroyed."
"Some Titan wannabee tried to pound me to the ground."
"Oh. Huh. Surprised he hasn't killed you yet." He blinks before she indicates a slight tear on his jogger's uniform before pointing at the rubble stain, "So, anything?"
"No. Except I got bored when I punched them."
"So nothing?"
"Yeah."
"Nothing like that one dream of those Subterranean humans you told me about before you actually found one before feeling insanely disappointed?" Okay, now she's being a cheeky little shit. Saitama's eye twitches, "So, no?"
"Will you just take the papers already!?"
Kaori hums as she takes the papers, "...so they're all in tact."
"Ah. Yeah." Saitama nods, "They are."
"...impressive, for a start." She places both unsealed and crinkled envelopes down, "So, Saitama."
"Yeah?"
"Want to know what else you can help me with?"
"Um, more errands?" Saitama asks, hoping the answer will be no so he can just head home for now. Oh and lunch. That should be soon, right?
"Actually, no. More like-" And then she pulls the curtain back to reveal a series of patients, who are also surprised to see him (they are patched up, and checked up on, he can see)- hey, he sees the couple and their son, who brighten up seeing him along with the girl who he saved in the morning.
Then he sees Kaori having that evil smirk and Saitama just knows he's not going to watch that anime marathon he had planned out for the rest of the day after lunch.
Oh GOD. His face pales.
"Oh you have got to be kidding-"
"Nope. Change out of that, spare clothing's over there- no, it's not the shirt you're going to wear, idiot- wash your hands, put on gloves- you're helping me for the rest of the day, so too bad about being lazy for the day, hage baka." And a pause, "Oh, I also took the liberty to ordering lunch for everyone- yes, including you, it's all takeout, paid and all, so there's your incentive for dinner. ...though you might want to take a shower first."
Crap. Saitama knew something was going to be different about today.
Though about one other thing that has him irritated-
"I AM NOT BALD, PONI-BOKE!"
"Ha, tell that in your sleep. Now hurry up and get changed already!"
The crunch of the grass is against his shoes, but all he sees are carnage.
Well, more like corpses of cows that have been sucked out of the liquid of life.
His golden eyes narrow, noticing the direction of Z-City.
Then he hears a small buzz before he quietly responds, "...speaking."
"Anything to report?"
The man who he's supposed to report findings to. ...that is one of the few things he's been told to do on his briefing. (As minuscule as the task really is to him.)
"The direction is towards Z-City." He reports, "What should be the next objective?"
A tired sigh before he hears the hero official mutter, "Shit. Seems like this House of Evolution is going to be more troublesome than we thought. Head over to Z-City to see if you find out anything else."
"Understood."
"Also-" This stops him again, "Call for backup if needed. As a S-Class, you should be able to do so. We will be able to send out help if needed."
A pause before, "It depends. Shall I still head over there by myself, if that's what you are about to ask?"
"Yes. Proceed as planned, Demon Cyborg."
'Demon Cyborg' nods, hanging up on the call before glancing down at something in his right wrist-
"You can have this," The black-haired high-schooler gives him a small smile, handing him a thin black, silver, and blue bracelet, "Kinda thought it reminds me of you. You know? It's been a year since we met."
"T-Thank you!" He chirps back, eyes brightening at seeing the teen smile back a bit wider in response, "Hey- what are your favorite colors?"
"Mine? ...um, kinda odd to ask, isn't it?" Though the teen pauses, "...let's see- white, red, yellow. ...yeah, kind of odd, right?"
A beat, "Reminds me of a hero."
"A hero...?" The teen pauses before laughing, "Oh man- that does sound like one! Though no way I'd like to be one."
"What? But you saved me that day!" He pouts, wanting the other to admit at least he wants something to make up for it.
"Nah, I only chose to do it," The teen smile back, "And I don't regret getting beat up in the process, as long as you're safe."
He stops, wanting to say that logic sounds absurd, but the teen doesn't look back at him, a small contemplative smile on his face that etches in the boy's head for a long time. Then a sudden urge of this unknown feeling-
"I'll protect you instead!"
That catches the teen's attention.
"I'll protect you-" The boy rambles on, "-from anyone who talks bad about you or if anything happens to you- I'll be your hero! I'll be here for you!"
The teen looks surprised before he smiles, "Do you now?" Then he grins, "Then I can't wait. The day you become a hero- come and see me, okay?"
He can't help but hide his slight laughter, "But really- if you do become a hero... what are you going to do? Save the world? Protect the citizens??"
The boy pauses before he shakes his head to all of that, causing the teen to blink, "...so, why are you going to be a hero?"
"To protect you," The boy is rather insistent on this, marching up and meeting the seventeen year old teen face to face, "You helped me- I wanna make it up to you!"
"Oh come on..." The teen groans, realizing how bullet-trained the boy's mind is before seeing the boy's incoming puppy pout, "...fine, but don't say being a hero is easy, got it?"
"Okay!" The nods are rather eager, but the boy is so happy on getting his friend's attention, "When I do become a hero, I'll visit you! And I'll protect you like I said!"
A surprised look before he hears genuine soft laughter from the black-haired high school student, leaning back on his bench before musing, "...so I have a protector. That's nice." Then he feels a pat on his head,
"Need help putting the bracelet on?"
The boy nods, a soft smile on his face, "...thank you, Saitama."
"No problem," Saitama responds back, firmly attaching the bracelet on the boy's wrist, "There. Just adjust it if you decide to wear it for a long time, okay?"
The boy nods, mentally swearing never to take it off as long as he lives.
"Okay!"
Saitama. The cyborg hero ghosts a finger on the bracelet before looking back up to the Z-City, I hope you're safe. He begins his trek to the city, mentally noting to find a certain black-haired person while he's at it.
"I hate you," Saitama seethes, sitting on the bed with the last few patients as he glares at the doctor who washed from aiding from the couple, "Why did I ever agree to be your errand person again?"
"Well, you were bored, when I asked if you wanted to be a hero through your life-threatening moronic training, you said no. So obviously there was one other way you can do it. ...and I pay you from time to time, since there really is a need for an assistant in the clinic," Kaori shrugs casually before seeing Maki chew on an apple slice, "Her parents on the way?"
"I'm thinking about calling the police station again," Saitama frowns, "The chief there- Kuma, right? He said he can't guarantee anything, but he'll find the parents as soon as possible."
"Okay." Kaori glances down before kneeling to meet Maki face to face,"Hey, Maki-chan?"
"Yeah? Where's Mom and Dad?"
"They should be on their way," Saitama can see how gently his friend is compared to how the two interact (he's gotten that comment a few times, but Saitama just calmly responds that he and Kaori get along like two people with same benefits, just mutual comprehension and no, they are not dating- like hell he wants to date that sadist), "So, in the meantime... want to be my mini-assistant for the day?"
That brightens the brat up, Saitama can't help but smile, seeing how Maki brightens up at the thought about helping the nice doctor, "Really?? I can?"
"Sure," Kaori softly smiles, gently patting her head before nodding to Saitama, "Check on the family, will you? The wife should be fine."
"Ah." Saitama recalled she did give birth- with the help of some of the adult patients who were also being treated with the doctor. The baby is fine, it is currently resting, but not too long ago, the child was bawling its eyes out. That had Saitama ire for a bit before seeing the mother and father calm the child down along with his son.
That image was a bit stinging in sadness to him, but he smiles at seeing at least they are okay.
"Oh!" The man looks up to see Saitama coming in, "Thank you for helping us earlier. If not for you coming in B-City..."
"Ah, your city," Saitama suddenly feels a bit bad before he heavily sighs, "You know-"
"We heard," The woman pauses before she softly smiles, looking at her child and sleeping son (who is the couch, jackets draped on him, "But... if it wasn't for you helping us earlier, our lives wouldn't have been saved. Thank you."
Saitama blinks as a small smile creeps at his face, a bit abashed from the compliment (hell, he was just on errand runs) but nevertheless...
"No problem," He nods, "Just be safe, okay? Your new child will need a quiet place to live. No monsters and all to wake him up."
"I know." The father gently strokes the mother's hand before asking, "Oh... sir? Are you a hero?"
Saitama pauses.
He would want to. There's a part of him that says he should try to.
But then the past reminds him about how much flack heroes get in turn for their assistance- needed or not.
Also- from experience, aren't there times where heroes don't get some of the things on time? Or they don't care from things?
He might've toyed with the idea at one point. But after that incident with the Crabman and how he knows people didn't even recall his deed (nor the relatives for that matter), he decided just being strong and helping people when heroes aren't there is just enough.
"Nah. Just being a protector, that's all."
A protector for the people. That should be more than enough for the city, right?
(There was a word for that- he finds out later, but it isn't a hero. And God was Saitama going to regret not knowing how much people view him as such later on.)