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When Dean crawls out of his grave, the sky is bright blue. As he pulls himself up, drenched in dirt and sweat, it's almost impossible to ignore. He's always known the sky was blue, but it's different actually being able to see the color of it.
The full weight of what it means doesn't hit him until he's driving to Bobby's, staring at nothing but open gray roads, green trees, and that blue, blue sky.
He's pretty sure he couldn't see the color blue when he died, torn apart by hellhounds. He remembers talking to Sam about it, in the days leading up to his deadline. Sam got characteristically weepy-eyed at the prospect of Dean never getting to meet his soulmate, never finding the person whose eyes were supposed to be the first blue Dean ever saw.
Dean remembers every second of Hell, except for when he met his soulmate. Still, the message is pretty clear– Dean's person isn't a person at all. It's a demon. Either that or a soul he tortured on the rack.
Dean presses down on the accelerator a little harder.
Bobby's surprised but glad to see Dean again, once he finishes dousing him with holy water. He's already made up his mind on not telling Sam how much he remembers from Hell, but this is something else.
"Bobby, wait." Dean says from the threshold, as they prepare to go find Sam to see if he’s the reason Dean is back.
Bobby pauses at the car, looking at Dean curiously. Dean's eyes flit up towards the sky. It’s a nice blue, interspersed with white, puffy clouds.
"You know, when Sam was a kid, I used to tell him that we probably had the best chance of anyone to find our soulmates." He stuffs his hands in his pockets. "I didn't really believe it, but he found it comforting."
Bobby stares at him. "You can still meet them, y'know."
"Sky's blue, Bobby," Dean replies, a tiny crack in his voice.
Bobby's shoulders and face sag, and Dean wonders if he's about to get another one of those bone- crushing hugs. He doesn’t think he’d mind.
"You don't remember?"
"Not a thing.” Not even a flash of blue eyes.
"That's bad luck, boy," Bobby says finally. “I’m sorry.”
Apparently, the thing that pulled him out of Hell is an angel named Castiel. He only did it on Heaven’s orders, but by the time Lucifer is yanked out of his cage, Dean’s given up on ever knowing who his soulmate was, and Cas seems to only do things for the Winchesters, not for Heaven.
"You know," Bobby says one night, while he and Dean are both pouring over lore books, trying to find ways to defeat Lucifer. "Cas has blue eyes."
Dean snorts. "You think Cas is my soulmate?”
"You don't remember meeting him in Hell, do you?”
"We're not– no . He’s an angel .”
“We don’t have any lore on angels. Maybe they have soulmates, too.”
“His eyes aren’t even blue ,” Dean protests. “Those are just the eyes of the meat suit he’s possessing. And even if they did, his soulmate would probably be another angel, not someone like– what’s that look for?”
Bobby’s tone remains innocent as he says with a shrug, “Just seems like you’ve given it a lot of thought.”
For the record, Dean hadn’t. And after his talk with Bobby, he continues to not give Cas being his soulmate any thought.
Cas confirms a few weeks later, during a case with a cherub, that angels don’t get soulmates.
Soulmates are supposed to be requited– that’s the whole point of them. So Cas can’t be Dean’s soulmate, because he can’t love Dean bac– like that – and Dean refuses to be one of those unlucky bastards that’s stuck with an unrequited soulmate. He’d rather have the trapped-in-Hell type of soulmate, because with the rate Dean’s life is going, he’ll probably be back there sooner rather than later.
Despite what he told Bobby, though, there are moments when Dean looks at Cas and thinks, yes, it could be you. When things slow down for a moment and Dean catches Cas’s eyes and sees the small smile on Cas’s face and something clicks into place
Cas is a better choice for a soulmate than a demon, at any rate.
Then Cas walks into that damn river, and Dean shoves his trench coat into his trunk and thinks, my soulmate wouldn’t leave me like this.
And then Cas comes back, and Dean gives him back the trench coat, and Dean pretends like he isn’t running out of excuses to go up and kiss the frown right off Cas’s face.
There’s no blue in Purgatory, after Cas disappears. The sky is always the same pale gray, gouged by dark, spindly tree branches. He prays to Castiel every night.
His prayers are answered when he finds Cas by the river.
There’s a rush of relief that fills his whole body, as he surges forward, laughing as he pulls Cas into a tight hug, breathing in the familiar scent of his best friend. Angels don’t sweat, but Cas always smells like a thunderstorm, and it reminds Dean of deep blue skies.
Maybe it’s the fact that they’re in Purgatory, and Dean’s basically dead. But when he pulls out of the hug, when he meets Cas’s blue eyes, something in his chest says, oh, there you are, soulmate.
Dean almost kisses Cas right then and there. Almost. Apparently Dean really is one of those unlucky bastards with an unrequited soulmate.
Dean’s soulmate is always leaving him, but more importantly, he always comes back. Dean has to believe he’s going to come back after Purgatory, too.
The day after Sam fails to close the Gates of Hell is one of the worst days of Dean’s life. His baby brother is lying broken in a hospital bed, and his soul– best friend – is scattered in the winds somewhere, missing his wings and his grace.
Dean prays to everyone he can, and someone’s listening, because Sam gets all healed up and Cas shows up at the Bunker, safe and sound, a few days later. Dean gives him a hug, and some new clothes from his closet, and a homemade burger and fries.
He steals said fries right off Cas’s plate, sitting down across from him at the kitchen table.
“How are you holding up?” Dean asks, because Cas looks a little worse for wear, even if the dark stubble on his face really works for him.
“Food doesn’t taste like molecules,” Cas replies, after chewing thoughtfully. “Urinating is very tiresome. And I didn’t realize how much humans couldn’t see.”
Dean frowns. “Hey, our eyes are pretty good.” He snatches another fry, and Cas lets him, giving him a small, beaming sort of smile.
“I can’t see souls anymore,” Cas explains, his smile fading. “Though I suppose I should’ve expected that. I wasn’t expecting to not be able to see as many colors, though.”
“What colors were you expecting?”
“All the grass was gray and yellow,” Cas says. “I didn’t realize you humans couldn’t see green.”
Dean freezes. He meets Cas’s eyes.
Cas tilts his head, frowning. “That’s odd. Your eyes are still green.”
Dean almost chokes on his contraband fry. What if– even if angels didn’t–
He needs proof. He jolts up, grabbing Cas’s hand, ignoring his questions and pulling him towards the door.
“Dean, where are we going?” Cas asks, allowing himself to be dragged along.
Dean pulls open the door of the Bunker and all but shoves Cas outside.
“Can you see green?” Dean asks, heart pounding in his chest like he’d joined Sam on one of his morning runs. He has to know .
“Yes,” Cas says. He steps out into the grass, peering down at it. “But why couldn’t I–”
“You have a soulmate,” Dean blurts out.
Cas turns around, giving Dean a look that’s almost pained. “But I’m an angel. We don’t get soulmates.”
“A fallen angel,” Dean corrects. “You’re human now. You have to eat, sleep, and I guess you get a soulmate, too.”
“And my soulmate is…”
“Me.” Dean’s voice threatens to catch in his throat. “I’ve known since Purgatory that you were it for me. My soulmate.”
Cas looks at Dean for a long moment. Dean’s heart slows down and he braces himself for the rejection.
“Are you disappointed?” Cas asks, as if he’s steeling himself.
“Are you kidding? There’s no one else I’d rather have as a soulmate. Like I said, you’re it for me.”
The smile is back on Cas’s face, and he steps closer to Dean, taking one of Dean’s hands in his. “Me too.”
Dean leans down, his lips meeting Cas’s. The kiss is soft and chaste, and when Dean pulls away, the only thing he can see is the blue of Cas’s eyes. Dean can’t help but smile as he leans in again; the universe came through for him after all.