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Okay, so… Percy was a demigod. That was… okay, it wasn’t new, but at this point in the summer he was just starting to accept it. Annabeth hadn’t been pulling his leg his first day at Camp and this wasn’t all just some grief-induced fantasy.
Like, it couldn’t be, right? Percy had been to the Underworld, to Mount Olympus, fought a god. So, this was just his life then, right?
Percy was actually a demigod. A son of Poseidon. Some sort of half human hybrid thing.
It’s fine. He could live with this. After all, he was still human, technically, right?
He just… could do some stuff that most humans couldn’t do. That’s okay. Like, there were Olympic athletes and super geniuses and stuff that could do things that he couldn’t do either. That didn’t make them inhuman.
It was fine. He was human. Just… with some extra skills.
So… he decided to make a list. A perfectly normal and reasonable reaction to finding out you have new talents. Besides, this way he would remember to tell his mom what he could do now. (Always do? Oh, whatever.)
Percy lay on his bunk in Cabin 3, chewing on his pencil, notebook in front of him. So far on his list “Things He Could Do that Ordinary People Couldn’t” he had
Breathe Underwater
Stay Dry Underwater
See(?) in Deep Water
Survive Deep Water Pressure
Survive Freezing Water
Talk to Horses
Water Healing
Understand Ancient Greek
Percy thought for a moment, and then added
Canoeing
There. That wasn’t too many odd talents. And some of them even regular people could do! So what if his father was a god, he could still be just a regular guy. Besides, everyone at Camp was the child of a god. It was fine. It was cool. He could still be normal.
Percy nodded to himself and flipped his notebook shut.
Everything was fine.
*****
So seventh grade was… fine. Okay, it was kinda boring and his school was weird but he’d made friends with the other kid who got bullied all the time, so Percy was counting that as a win.
Besides, for the first time since he was little, it was just him and his mom. He could finally just watch movies with her, or work on his skateboard in the living room, or just relax. He didn’t need to worry about figuring out how to live around Smelly Gabe. Percy and his mom could just… live.
And that’s what they did. Percy would help his mom with dinner; she would help him with homework. He’d go to school; she’d go to work. They’d buy groceries and do chores. Percy would go hang out at the park, playing basketball or skateboarding. His mom would work on her college work or her novel. They just lived a totally normal life as normal people.
And… okay, it was starting to get to Percy. After all, it was almost like last summer never happened. No Camp, no quest, no gods or monsters or demigods. No friends or dad or place where he belonged. It all seemed like it was just a dream, a story he made up to make himself feel better.
That’s probably what led to his mom finding him sitting in the shower one night, fully clothed and perfectly dry.
“Hey baby,” she sat on the edge of the bathtub, and reached over a hand to mess with his hair. “What’s wrong?”
“You’re going to get wet,” Percy said.
“That’s okay. I’ll dry,” she replied. They sat in silence for a few moments, water raining down on Percy, his mom carding fingers through his hair. Eventually she asked, “You want to talk about it?”
“It’s weird,” Percy muttered into his knees. “It might not make any sense.”
His mom gave a small huff of laughter, “I think I can handle weird, baby.”
“It’s just…” Percy held out one of his hands into the water, watching as the droplets pooled and ran off his skin like beads of quicksilver. “I’m dry,” he finished, because apparently stating the obvious was all he could do.
“Ya, baby,” his mom said softly.
“You’re not,” Percy added. “You’re getting all wet.”
“Ya, I know,” she reassured him. “It’s okay, Percy.”
“So, that means it was real, right?” Percy looked at his mom pleadingly. “I’m really a demigod then, right? Like, I don’t think this happens to regular humans. And Camp and Grover and Annabeth and Chiron… They’re all real, right?”
“Oh baby,” his mom said, sounding like she was trying not to cry. “I promise you that they’re real.” She leaned over and kissed the top of his head. “I’m sorry, baby. I should have been keeping you more connected with your father’s side of the family.” She ran her fingers through his hair some more. “I know Grover’s busy with his search but maybe you could contact Annabeth? Do you have an address or phone number for her?”
Percy shook his head.
“What about any of your other friends from Camp?” His mom asked.
“No,” Percy said, feeling more miserable by the second.
“Hmmm,” his mom hummed. “Well then, I guess I’ll just have to call Chiron in the morning. He probably can put me in contact with Annabeth’s family.”
“You can call Chiron?” Percy asked.
“Yes,” his mom replied. “How do you think I knew where Camp was?”
“I don’t know,” Percy admitted. Then, “You think that’ll work?”
“We’ll see, baby,” his mom replied. “Don’t worry. We’ll figure it out. You’re not alone.” She gave him another kiss on the head. “Now, do you want to keep sitting in the shower, baby? Or we could go make cookies?”
“You’re not going to make me go to bed?” Percy asked.
“I think you can stay up late one night,” she replied. “Besides, I don’t think you’re going to fall asleep anytime soon after sitting in the shower like this.”
“Ya,” Percy looked up at his mom hopefully . “Cookies?”
“You head to the kitchen, sweetie,” his mom said with one last ruffle of his hair. “I’m going to change into a dry shirt.”
“Okay,” Percy said, standing and turning the shower off. “Sorry.”
“Don’t worry about it, baby; I’ll dry,” his mom said. “Now go on.”
Percy wasn’t really going to argue. Not with the promise of cookies, anyway.
*****
So his mom talked to Chiron, who talked to Dr. Chase, who called his mom, and now Percy not only had Annabeth’s address and phone number, but his mom had also set him up an email so they could message each other.
Which was really nice. Percy hadn’t noticed how alone he’d felt being the only demigod around until he started messaging Annabeth. It was like something inside him relaxed, just knowing that there were other demigods out there. That he wasn’t alone.
Of course, he wasn’t the only one struggling with the mortal world. Annabeth hadn’t really lived there since she was seven and was dealing with a bit of culture shock herself.
And as great as his mom was, well it was nice for both of them to talk about how weird it was being a demigod in a world of humans.
It was okay. They’d be fine.
*****
Percy looked over at the bunk where Tyson was snoring.
So… his brother was a cyclops. That was… a thing. Now that they were done with their (unofficial and if anyone asks they didn’t leave Camp) quest, Percy actually had time to process that information. Like, Percy knew that his father’s side of the family wasn’t human but… they really weren’t human, were they?
Which meant that Percy… well, he was half-human, right?
Besides, it’s not like you had to be human to be, like, a person. Like, look at Tyson and Grover! Or even Chiron! They weren’t human, and they were great! So it’s not like being inhuman was something awful.
Not that this mattered to Percy, because he was half-human so he really didn’t count as inhuman.
Percy tranced his fingers over his new watch band. Although, with a brother like Tyson, maybe being inhuman wouldn’t be so bad.
*****
Okay, he’d never admit this to Thalia, but New York was lonely without her and Annabeth around. Sure, they hadn’t seen each other all that much in the first half of the school year but it’d been nice having them around.
And now… there was no one in the city for Percy to fight monsters with, or spar with, or complain about mortal teachers with. (Okay, that last one he could probably do with his mom, but still.)
And ya, it kinda had Percy in a bit of a funk.
And his mom, to her credit, was trying to help. She’d make Greek food, and encourage him to use his powers, and she was even taking a class in Ancient Greek so he’d have someone to talk to. (She’d also taken a first aid class, and Percy, while grateful, was trying not to think about that too much.)
It was about a month into the spring semester when the letter came.
“Percy, you have mail,” his mother called.
Percy looked up from his homework and took the letter his mom handed to him. Who was sending him mail?
Then he looked at the address and smiled. The letter was addressed to Perse Iakson, Percy Jackson. Ya, there was only one person who would misspell his name like that.
He opened the letter to see Annabeth’s much neater penmanship in Ancient Greek.
Well, since apparently you don’t check your email anymore, Seaweed Brain, I’ll just have to talk to you the old fashioned way.
So first of all, San Francisco sucks. There’s so many monsters because of Mount Othrys, and I’m the only demigod around! So naturally, they all come after me. My stepmother isn’t too happy about that, but at least my dad is trying to deal with her. At least, she’s not treating me like a freak of nature anymore.
Also, I swear there are less nature spirits around here than New York, which is ridiculous since there’s more natural areas. And what nymphs and satyrs I do see tend to go out of their way to avoid me. I don’t get it.
All of this leaves San Francisco depressing mortal. I don’t get how you lived like this for twelve years…
Percy smiled as he continued reading, already planning out his response. Though he was going to use his (admittedly forgotten) email to commiserate with their demigod woes.
*****
So Percy didn’t know what the rules were for meeting the person your mom was dating, but he got the feeling that “at least pretend to be human” was one of them. And he was already spectacularly failing at that.
“Sorry,” Percy said, after their building maintenance manager turned off the water, put a temporary patch on the bathroom pipes, and left. He pulled the excess water off the floor of their apartment and directed it down the kitchen sink, whose pipes were still intact (or he was pretty sure they were.)
“It’s okay, baby. It happens,” his mom reassured him, picking up damp towels and sheets from the floor. “Besides, I don’t think there’s going to be any water damage. Just some pipes that need replaced.”
“Ya but…” Percy shifted awkwardly. “Weren’t you having your boyfriend over for dinner tonight? ‘Cause I kinda just blew up our bathroom and you heard Robert, he might not be able to get a plumber here ‘til tomorrow.”
“So we can go out for dinner or reschedule,” his mom said. “It’ll be fine, sweetie. Now, I’m going to put these in the laundry. Why don’t you go get dressed? Then we can have breakfast and talk about whatever upset you so bad, okay?”
“Okay,” Percy said gloomily, still thinking about the busted pipes and his mom’s boyfriend.
His mom at least waited for him to get most of the way through his bowl of cereal before broaching the topic. “So, what’s got you so upset, baby?” she asked.
“Just a bad dream,” Percy pushed the cereal around his bowl, not looking at his mom. “It’s no big deal. Definitely not worth breaking pipes and ruining your night over.”
His mom put down her cup with a sigh, “Percy, it will be okay. I know this was an accident. You don’t need to worry about the pipes or Paul.”
“But tonight was really important to you and I—“ Percy started to argue.
“Did nothing wrong,” his mom interrupted.
Ya, but if I wasn’t a demigod this wouldn’t have happened , Percy thought gloomily.
“Percy, sweetie,” his mom said. “I know you. I know you didn’t do this on purpose. And what minor damage there is can be easily fixed. It’s okay, baby. Now, I know you usually have pretty good control of your powers unless you’re really upset. What’s wrong, baby? What did you dream about?”
Percy pushed his now-too-soggy-to-eat cereal around his bowl. Did he want to tell her? And if he did, what should he say? He didn’t want to worry her, but it seemed too late for that.
“Bianca,” he finally managed to choke out.
“One of the kids who died on your last quest?” his mom clarified.
“It was my fault, my stupid plan that killed her and—“
“Percy, breathe,” his mom interrupted. “You’re working yourself up, sweetie.”
After he took a few breaths, she continued. “Now, did you make Bianca follow your plan?”
“No.”
“Did you create the dangerous situation you kids found yourself in?
“Well no, but—“
“Sweetie,” his mom interrupted again, “ it’s not your fault. You can mourn Bianca, and be upset that she died without blaming yourself. Okay?”
Percy wasn’t quite sure he believed her but he said, “ Okay,” nevertheless.
His mom got up to put her breakfast dishes in the sink. On her way past him, she stopped to kiss the top of his head. “It’s not your fault, baby. It’ll be okay. You still up for meeting Paul tonight?”
“Ya, sure,” he said, picking up his bowl. Maybe he could still do this. Maybe he could still pretend he was normal for his mom’s sake. Maybe he could pretend he was just a regular mortal kid.
******
“But you’re not human, are you?”
Percy swallowed. No one had ever put it so bluntly before. Like, ya, technically, he knew that. But… he’d never really thought about it. Never really thought of himself that way. And frankly, he couldn’t deal with that kind of existential crisis right now.
“I’m half human,” he offered and hoped it would be enough.
Honestly, he was almost grateful when the empousai attacked and prevented the conversation from going much further.
That didn’t prevent Rachel’s words from setting up a permanent residence inside his head though.
“You’re not human, are you?”
*****
A major volcanic eruption. Numerous causalities. Half a million people displaced. And he did that on accident.
Ya, Percy couldn’t kid himself anymore. He definitely wasn’t human.
*****
Percy stepped into Chiron’s office. The place looked the same as it had last year when Annabeth and him had…um, borrowed…Chiron’s CDs and radio to scare off the Stymphalian birds. Ancient computer, piles of scrolls and papers, a wall covered in pictures like the refrigerator of a proud parent, Camp’s only landline phone, a large cushion that Percy assumed was some sort of centaur chair, ya know that sort of thing. And in the middle of it all stood Chiron, reading over what Percy assumed was a report of some kind.
“Hi Chiron,” Percy said, “You wanted to talk to me?”
Chiron looked up from what he was reading, “Ah Percy, yes. Come have a seat.” He gestured to the open chairs.
Percy sat down, trying to ignore the “I’ve been called to the principal's office” feeling. He didn’t think he’d done anything wrong recently. Besides, Chiron was more into discussions rather than punishments.
Chiron put the report aside and settled down on the cushion. “So, you are returning to your mother’s for the school year?” he asked.
“Yes sir,” Percy responded, wondering where this was going. Chiron should know that he was a summer camper by now, right? Or…oh no. Was Chiron going to ask him to stay for the school year, help out with the war and all?
“Good,” Chiron said, quickly dispelling that fear. “It’ll be good for you to spend some time with her.”
Chiron studied him, and Percy tried not to squirm under his gaze. “You are turning fifteen soon, yes?” Chiron asked.
“Ya…”Percy replied.
“Correct me if I am wrong, Percy,” Chiron continued. “But I believe that is the common age in this country for young people to begin learning how to drive.”
“Ya…” Why was Chiron discussing this with him?
“And to do this, you will be issued an ID?” Chiron clarified.
“Uh huh,” Percy said. Seriously, what was this all about?
Chiron folded his hands together. “Then there is something I must make sure you understand before you and your mother fill out the paperwork required to issue you an ID,” he stated.
Percy swallowed, and gripped the edge of his seat. That sounded… ominous. “Okay.”
“When you are acquiring your ID, they will ask you if you want to be an organ donor,” Chiron explained. “You must decline.”
“Wait, what?” Percy asked, leaning forward in his chair. “Isn’t that a good thing to do? Like it saves lives? If I’m dead I’m not really going to be using my organs, so why shouldn’t they go to someone they can help? I mean…” Percy rocked back and forth a few times in his chair. “What?”
Chiron looked at him with that thousand year old gaze and smiled. “You are growing into a fine young man, Percy,” Chiron said.
Percy blushed at the unexpected praise.
“However,” Chiron continued, “I must insist on this issue. You are correct that if a human were to become an organ donor, they could potentially save other human lives. But Percy, you are a demigod. If a human doctor were to mistakenly transplant one of your organs into a human, their body would reject it, instantly and fatally.
“For this same reason, I must also ask that you do not donate blood.” Chiron said, calmly. “While between humans, this is a life saving procedure, the small amount of ichor that runs in your veins would contaminate the human blood supply. Do you understand?”
Percy gripped the edge of his seat harder and stared at the floor. He guessed that made sense. He was a demigod, only half human. Which, ya, okay, of course he couldn’t be a viable donor to a full human. And it wasn’t like a regular doctor would be able to tell the difference between him and a full human. Whatever differences existed in his anatomy, well, Percy guessed that they wouldn’t be visible under a microscope. Especially not with the Mist covering things up…
Gods, what were the differences in his anatomy? Percy had always figured that he was close enough to human that he could just follow the same guidelines but now… After all, this wasn’t exactly the first time Chiron had discussed with him how he medically differed from an average human.
“I understand, Chiron,” Percy said.
“Good,” Chiron stood up, and patted Percy on the shoulder. “Then I won’t keep you from your daily activities any longer.”
Chiron left the office, and Percy followed, silently, behind.
*****
So, having Paul move in was weird. Not like bad weird just… different? After two years of it being just him and his mom, having another person in the apartment was odd. Percy was adjusting; it would be fine.
And it’s not that Percy didn’t like Paul or something. On the contrary, he was excited about his mom and Paul’s upcoming marriage. Just seeing how happy his mom was made it all worth it for Percy.
But still, it was going to take some getting used to having someone else living in the apartment. New set of toiletries in the bathroom, different food in the kitchen, and his mom and Paul had turned the living room into a library with the combined amount of books they owned.
Then there was the demigod thing. Paul was officially the third mortal to learn that Percy was a demigod and he was taking it… surprisingly well? No screaming, no nervous breakdowns, no nothing. Seriously, Percy had expected… something. After all, learning that your future stepson isn’t completely human… like, that had to be super weird, right?
But Paul treated Percy much the same as he had before. Offered him rides to the skate park, helped with carrying the laundry down to their building’s basement, asked about his day at dinner, ya know, that kinda thing.
And somehow that made Percy feel even less human than before. His mom and Paul were just going about their regular lives and Percy… well, he was just play-acting as a human, wasn’t he? Like, he’d go grocery shopping with them, or clean his room, or play video games, and even Percy would forget that he wasn’t just a regular kid.
But then… something would always happen, and remind him what a half-human freak of nature he was. Like coming home from a walk in the rain perfectly dry, or always smelling like the ocean no matter what soap or shampoo he used, or having his armor and spare javelins fall out of his closet because he moved the wrong thing. His reflexes were just a bit too quick, his senses just a bit too keen, his body just a bit too durable. Heck, he’d get tossed around like a rag doll during a fight and, instead of having to go to the hospital (ya know, like a regular human), he’d peel himself off the ground and walk away. (It’d hurt like Hades, but he could do it and be just fine.)
And even through the Mist, it was clear that Paul picked up on some of his strangeness. Every time Percy did something weird or inhuman, Paul would briefly give him a look, like he was trying to figure out what or how that had happened, before carrying on like Percy’s strangeness was the most normal thing in the world. He’d crack a joke about Percy never needing to worry about forgetting an umbrella or offer to help clean up the dangerous weapons all over his bedroom floor, as if these were just regular occurrences that came with living with a teenager.
Percy had considered asking his mom how far into the uncanny valley he resided but he didn’t want to upset her. That bothered humans, when you implied that a person they cared about wasn’t human.
Besides, he was half-human, right? That had to count for something. That was close enough, most of the time, right?
Percy just hoped his inhumanity didn’t scare off Paul in the meantime.
*****
Percy had just wanted to stop by the skate park on the way home from school, burn off some energy before having to settle in and do homework. Instead he got chased around downtown for hours by a bunch of Stymphalian birds.
It was after eleven by the time he got back to the apartment. Percy was tired, hungry, bleeding from a bunch of small cuts, and figured that his homework was a lost cause for the night.
He opened the door as quietly as he could, and tried to sneak over to the bathroom.
Too bad that he’d forgotten that they’d moved the end table.
“Mētrokoí—!“ Percy grabbed at his shin, biting off the end of the swear, not wanting to wake his mom and Paul.
But Percy’s luck was never that good.
“Percy?” his mom’s voice called from the hallway.
The light flicked on, and there stood his mom and Paul, standing in the hall doorway in their pjs.
“Hi Mom, Paul,” Percy said, letting go of his leg to wave at them. “Sorry, I’m late. I didn’t mean to wake you.”
“We weren’t sleeping,” Paul said, looking a bit dumbfounded.
“You’re hurt,” his mom said, rushing over to check over his injuries.
“Only a little bit,” Percy said, not wanting his mom to worry too much.
His mom gave him a look, clearly not buying his downplaying, and gently tugged him toward the kitchen.
“Paul, could you be a dear and get the first aid kit? It should be in the drawer under the bathroom sink,” his mom called out over her shoulder.
“Right!” Paul said, snapping out of his daze. “On it!”
“Mom, I’ll be fine,” Percy argued, though he let her guide him into a chair. “Don’t worry.”
“I know you will be, baby,” she said, kissing him on the head. “Now let me see.”
Percy let her fret over his cuts and scrapes. (It’s not like he could stop her anyway.)
Paul came into the kitchen, first aid kit in hand. “I thought this was in the medicine cabinet?” he asked.
“Ours is,” his mom clarified, opening up the kit. “This is Percy’s.”
“It’s full of demigod medicine,” Percy mumbled, trying not to think too hard about how he needed a separate set of medical supplies than his mom and Paul.
“Ah,” Paul said, looking concerned and sounding very much out of his depth. “So like… magic potions and stuff?”
“Basically,” Percy replied.
Percy looked at a cut on the back of his hand, near the base of his thumb. He watched the red blood well up, and drip out, something so normal, something so human. He almost wanted to leave it, let it heal on its own, the regular human way.
But his mom nudged a canteen of nectar into his other hand, and he knew he couldn’t do it, couldn’t let her watch him suffer because he wanted to feel human.
Percy took a swig, and watched as the ichor in his veins knit his flesh back together.
He tried to ignore Paul’s amazed stares.
“There, all better,” His mom stood and kissed the top of his head. “Now let’s get some dinner into you and get you off to bed.”
*****
So the problem with spending the last couple of years mainly playing basketball with other demigods is that, well, Percy had forgotten how to take into account humans’ slower speed and reflexes. Which frequently led to him passing the ball to just to the left or right of where his teammates actually were. Also, almost running into them alot. (Thank the gods his reflexes were fast enough to avoid most collisions.) But other than it getting him labeled as clumsy by his teammates, it wasn’t really much of an issue considering he was on the JV team.
Well, until that game in January.
Everything had been going pretty normal. Percy had only almost tripped over his teammates or the other team a few times. Goode was winning for once. And Dixon was being, well… a dick.
Percy really didn’t know what the dude’s issue was. Okay, scratch that, he had a pretty good idea. The dude loved being the center of attention, he thought he was always right, and if something bad happened in his life, he refused to believe that it was ever his fault. Percy tried his best to ignore and avoid him, but well, see point one. Dude basically hated Percy’s guts (a feeling that was mutual) and tried to get in Percy’s way as much as possible.
As such, he spent most of each game guarding Percy instead of, ya know, anyone on the other team. Profoundly annoying, but easy enough to work around when you have inhuman speed and reflexes.
Until Percy blocked a pass from the other team, pushing the ball out of the way, accidentally sending it Dixon’s way. And Dixon… well he was just a human. He could never have been fast enough to dodge it.
The thing was if he hadn’t tried to dodge, the ball would never have hit him. Instead, it hit him square in the face.
The game was immediately called to a halt, Percy and Dixon both pulled to the sidelines. Dixon was cursing Percy out, claiming he attacked him, blood dripping from his nose like a faucet.
Percy countered that he was clumsy and it clearly was an accident, internally cursing at how slow and fragile humans could be.
Thankfully, all Dixon had was a bloody nose, otherwise Percy wasn’t sure that the nurse, coaches, and referees would have ruled it an accident. Percy wasn’t kicked off the team, but he was benched for the rest of the game. And Dixon had a whole new reason to hate him. Great.
*****
It was finally here. The main invasion. The battle to defend Olympus. It was days of hours upon hours of fighting, killing monsters, incapacitating enemy demigods. It was gruesome, tiring, terrifying work. Percy would never be able to get these days out of his head.
And yet, part of him was thrilled. It all felt so right, the tensing and relaxing of his muscles, the sweat running down his back, the steady breathing of his lungs. He got to let go, use the full range of his half human, half divine nature. He didn’t have to slow his reflexes, or temper his strength. He didn’t have to pretend to be anything less than what he was.
He was a demigod. This is what he was born for. It made the blood and ichor mixing in his veins hum with the satisfaction of being complete.
And as good as it felt, it still made him sick to his stomach. What kind of monster was he to enjoy this?
*****
You know, there was part of Percy that wished that he had known to enjoy those few months of pretending at being human that he had after the Battle of Manhattan and the end of the Second Titanomachy. The peace of it, the simplicity. How nice it was to be with his family, going on dates with Annabeth, just getting to revel in his human half for the first time in years.
Then kidnapping, after amnesia, after quest, after horror, after war. Months and months of the world reminding him of just how inhuman he was, just how godly, just how monstrous.
And when he finally got to go home, to see his parents again, well, he wasn’t sure of how much of his humanity was left.
Maybe that is why he had wanted to succumb to Polybotes’ poison beneath the waves. To prove that there was a part of him that was still human, that could still die.
*****
On the other hand, that first year after returning home, his brain and body made sure to remind him of just how human he still was. After all, humans were not made to deal after all of that. And he… well, he wasn’t okay.
Eating became hard, he lost weight. Sleeping was harder, yet he was so tired that that was all he wanted to do when he was awake. And everywhere the memories haunted him, not usually flashbacks, just echoes that never quite left his mind. And he hurts, oh gods did he hurt. His anger burned like fire just below his skin, and it felt like his organs had been replaced with broken glass, cutting him up from the inside.
His mom contacted Chiron, and together they figured out a therapist he could go to, a child of Dionysus who’d managed to survive to the ripe old age of thirty four. Paul walked him through doing the bare minimum amount of homework so that he was still passing, and tried to find him silly tv shows or ocean documentaries to watch, anything to distract him from the inside of his head. Part of him felt bad about how much work his parents put in coaxing him to do anything that might help, but it was so much work to care despite how grateful he was. He spent much of that year wishing for amnesia again, to forget what had happened to him, to forget what he’d done, to dull some of the pain.
Eventually things started to get better. Percy’s mind wandered back to the past only half of the time, instead of all. He started eating more regularly, gaining back the weight he had lost. He spent less nights waking up, and eventually his energy started to return. Smiling became easier, less forced. Eventually his humanity started feeling comfortable again, instead of excruciatingly painful.
*****
It was just a typical evening in the Jackson-Blofis household. Dinner had been made, eaten and cleaned up, so everyone settled into their own activities. His mom was working on a crossword puzzle, Paul was reading the news, and Percy was fixing the wheels on his skateboard.
“Name for themselves, Greek?” His mom asked.
“Hellene,” Percy answered. “Don’t ask me how you spell that using the Latin alphabet.”
“I’ll make my best guess, sweetie. Childhood’s End, Author?” his mom said.
“Arthur C. Clarke,” Paul responded.
“Any interesting news?” his mom asked.
“There’s a squirrel that can water ski,” Paul said.
“Of course, there is,” Percy commented.
“Some politicians are threatening each other, again,” Paul said, scrolling.
“That’s not new,” his mom said.
“Scientists have found hidden patterns on bird feathers,” Paul continued.
“Hidden how?” His mom asked, writing down another answer.
“Hmmm, it looks like they’re only visible under UV lights,” Paul said.
“Anything else?” Percy asked, testing how his wheels spun.
“They’re debating on whether to ban bottom trawling in international waters,” Paul read.
“Good. Those nets are so massively destructive. Gods, why did humans have to invent them?” Percy said without thinking.
And then it hit him. Humans. He’d said humans. As if he wasn’t one.
Paul said something in response, but Percy couldn’t make it out through the ringing in his ears. Not human… He wasn’t… He didn’t consider himself…
His mom looked up from her crossword, “Percy?”
For some reason, that’s what did it. Percy dropped his skateboard and bolted. He had to get away. He couldn’t—He wasn’t—
Soon Percy found himself on the fire escape, gripping the railing for dear life, and sucking down lungfuls of air. His head spun and he was pretty sure he was going to throw up, but at least he didn’t feel trapped anymore.
He wasn’t human. He wasn’t human. He no longer considered himself human. Percy leaned over the railing and groaned.
From the apartment came his parents' cries of alarm, some small part of his brain registered. But Percy was more focused on trying to breathe.
He didn’t consider himself human. He wasn’t human. He wasn’t human. He wasn’t human he wasn’t human hewasn’thumanhewasn’thumanhe—
A hand on his back startled him and he gripped the rail harder as he teetered dangerously. The hand pulled away and he whipped his head around to see who had touched him.
“Percy?” His mom said, clearly worried.
“I’m sorry,” Percy choked out. “I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m—“
“Shhhhh,” his mom said, reaching out to rub comforting circles on his back. “It’s okay, baby. You don’t have to apologize. Let’s just focus on breathing, okay? Can you take a deep breath for me?”
Percy breathed in and out, his lungs hitching several times.
“Good,” his mom said, soothingly. “Let’s try that a few more times.”
Percy let his mom guide him through breathing. Slowly it became easier, his head stopped spinning, and his stomach unclenched.
“Now,” his mom eventually said, “what upset you so much, baby?”
“I’m not human,” Percy admitted.
His mom gave him a small smile, brushing his hair out of his eyes, “I know, baby. I’ve known that since before you were born. It’s okay, Percy. We still love you. It’ll be okay.”
Percy made a noise of discomfort.
“It really just sunk in for you that you’re a demigod, didn’t it sweetie?” His mom asked, still worried.
“No, I know that I’m a demigod. I know that. I just— I don’t think of myself as human anymore.” Percy admitted, voice still shaking.
His mom fussed with his hair some more. “And that really bothers you doesn’t it? It’ll be okay, Percy. You don’t have to be human if you don’t want to, but you can be human if you do. You’re both, sweetie. It’ll be okay. You’re not the only one, and you still have people who care about you either way.” SHe kissed his head. “You don’t have to be human to be loved. You don’t have to be human to be good. It’ll be okay, Percy.”
“Hmmm,” Percy hummed, finally letting go of the railing to hug his mom. “It’ll be okay?”
“Yes, yes it will, baby,” she reassured him.
Eventually, he calmed down enough that the two of them could rejoin Paul inside, where he had tea waiting for them.
Later, Percy was grateful that it had taken him a few days to notice that the fire escape railing was now bent.
*****
“Is it weird,” Percy asked, “having a step kid who isn’t human?”
Paul looked up from the crib instructions he was holding to look at Percy. “ I doubt it’s much weirder than having a human step kid, if that’s what you’re asking.”
Percy kept twisting screw F into pieces E and D. “Somehow I don’t think that’s true.”
“Well, I’ve never had a human step kid so I can’t say for certain,” Paul said, picking up and inspecting crib pieces. “But in my experience, every kid comes with things you don’t expect. Disabilities, strange hobbies, family members who really are old enough to know better. Of course, with step kids there is the whole figuring out how to integrate yourself into an existing family, but that’s mostly on my end, not yours. The specifics of the situation might be different, but I think that over all it’s mostly the same. Why do you ask?”
Percy didn’t want to look at Paul. He instead focused on matching up crib pieces and screwing them together. Eventually he said, “You and mom are having a kid soon. And I’m just worried about, ya know, how safe it is to have a human baby around someone who’s, ya know, not human.” His voice got real wavery near the end there, the words barely coming out.
“Oh,” Paul said, softly. Percy heard him shift positions before continuing, “You know, I’m pretty sure your mom and I already have a kid.”
Percy looked up at Paul, who was connecting his own set of crib pieces. What was he talking about?
“You,” Paul clarified. “We’re not replacing you with a human kiddo, Percy. Nor do we think you’ll be a danger to your sibling.”
“But the monsters—“ Percy started.
“Have only ever been a threat to your mom and I when we actively chose to attack them,” Paul stated, calmly. “But living with you, existing around you, that’s never put us in harm’s way. There’s no reason for us to believe that it will be any different for your sibling.”
“Okay, but like, what if they try to imitate the inhuman stuff I do and get hurt?” Percy argued.
“Younger siblings often do try to imitate older siblings, that’s true,” Paul agreed. “But Percy, the younger siblings potentially getting hurt is something all parents have to worry about. This isn’t unique to demigods, nor is it your responsibility to worry about.”
“Ya but—“
“Percy,” Paul interrupted. “You are not a danger. It doesn’t matter if you’re a human, demigod, or whatever. You are a part of our family. A valuable part of our lives. You will make your sibling’s life better by being in it. You’re not a threat to them just because you aren’t as human.”
“Are you sure?” Percy asked.
“Yes,” Paul said. “Let your mom and I take care of both of you, okay? You are both our kids, after all.”
“Okay,” Percy said. “Can you pass me one of those screws, please?”
*****
Annabeth would be gone for a week. She was visiting her father for a week in San Francisco. She called it an exercise in strengthening intrafamily relationships. Percy called it bonding time. And while her relationship with her father would never be great, well, Percy could tell that it was important to Annabeth, so he supported her, even if he had mixed feelings about the man.
Besides, this would give Percy plenty of time to spend with his baby sister, which was always awesome, even if she did try to eat his hoodie strings.
But as the week wore on, a nagging sadness worked its way into Percy. It took him a few days to realize what it was.
Estelle had fallen asleep on his chest after they had played a few rounds of Boop the Nose! That never failed to make her laugh, and Percy loved to hear his sister laugh. Percy looked at the infant sleeping on his chest, and smiled wistfully.
“Looks like someone needed a nap, huh kiddo?” Paul said, playfully ruffling Percy’s hair.
“Ya, she tuckered herself out,” Percy said.
“I’m pretty sure you helped with that, sweetie,” his mom said, looking up from the laptop where she was writing her next book, and smiling at the two of them. But something of what he was feeling must have shown on his face, because her smile vanished and she asked, “How you feeling, baby?”
“Oh, ya know…” Percy said, not wanting to ruin his family’s small moment of joy.
“Something’s bugging you, isn’t it kiddo?” Paul asked, sitting next to him.
“It’s nothing,” Percy readjusted his hold on his sister before relenting. “It’s weird and kinda stupid.”
“If it’s bugging you it’s not stupid, baby,” his mom said. “And I’m pretty sure we’re all used to weird.”
“It’s just…” Percy hesitated. Would his parents even understand? “I just feel kinda lonely, that’s all.”
“Lonely?” Paul asked.
“It’s hard to explain,” Percy muttered.
“You want to try, baby?” his mom asked.
Percy gently rubbed his sister’s back. “You know I love you all so much, right?” he said, tears welling up in his eyes.
“Oh Percy, yes,” Paul said at the same time his mom said, “Of course, we do, baby.”
“Good, because I do. It’s just that…” Percy reached one hand up to rub at his eyes. “You’re all human. And sometimes it feels kinda lonely being the only one in the family who’s not. Sorry.”
“Oh Percy, baby,” his mom said, putting aside the laptop so she could come over and wipe at his tears.
“Ya, you are in an odd position there, aren’t you kiddo?” Paul said, running his fingers through Percy’s hair. “But you know that you always have a place in our family, right? Even if you aren’t human.”
“We love you so much, Percy,” his mom said, kissing the top of his head. “We’ll do our best, sweetie. But I wish you didn’t have to be alone.”
“I know,” Percy said. Because at the end of the day, what else could they do except be there with him while he hurt? They couldn’t stop being human anymore than he could stop being a demigod.
*****
Percy was so excited. It was his family’s first trip to Montauk since Estelle was born and he was so excited to show her the cabin, and the beach, and the ocean. It was only one they had unpacked and were heading down to the water that Percy remembered something important.
“Wait”, he said, stopping a few feet from the surf. He turned to where his parents were setting up his sister on a beach towel. “How warm does it have to be for water to be a safe temperature for humans?” he asked.
“At least eighty,” Paul answered, handing Estelle a small plastic shovel.
“But that’s only if we’re going swimming,” his mom clarified. “You should be fine if you want to dip Estelle’s feet into the water for a little bit, okay Percy?”
“Ya okay, maybe later,” Percy said. “But for now…” he pulled a bit of water out of the sea and went over to where his sister was digging in the sand, being propped up by his mom. “Hey Estelle, look at this.” He made the water into a floating blob, letting it twist and bob through the air.
Estelle shrieked with delight, dropping her shovel and trying to grab at it.
And it felt good, letting both his humanity and divinity show. Maybe he was born for this too.