Chapter Text
Mr Holmes created 'God Save Us'
Mr Holmes added 10+ contacts
Bandages: RANPO YES
Sadist: What are you scheming now Ranpo?
Mr Holmes: Just wait for it
Fancy Hat: What the actual fuck.
Mr Holmes: There we gooo
Bandages: CHUUUYYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Fancy Hat: FUCK OFF DAZAI
Discord kitten: Are we sure this is a good idea?
Mr Holmes: Prez said we need to get along with the PM
Mr Holmes: This is the best your getting
MILF: Oh god.
Bandages: Hey Kouuyouuu
MILF: No.
Bandages: :((((((
F Goth: Wow this is crazy
Evil Ed Sheeran: FR FR
Evil Ed Sheeran: This is gon be chaotic as fuck tho
Fancy Hat: Yea no Im out.
Mr Holmes: I know your secrets.
Fancy Hat: Guess Im staying
Bandages: RANPO TEACH ME YOUR WAYSSSS
Librarian: RANPO WE SHOULD NOT BE COMMUNICATING WITH THE PORT MAFIA UNLESS IT IS FOR A MISSION
Mr Holmes: I got permission chill out jesus
F Goth: @Fancy Hat Is Ryu with you btw?
Fancy Hat: Yea he next to me
Fancy Hat: I dont think hes okay
F Goth: God whats he doing now
Fancy Hat: Rambling on about you know who
Discord Kitten: Dazai?
Fancy Hat: Ha your funny weretiger
Bandages: Wait who else be it be??
Bandages: Ohhhhhhhh nvm :9
F Goth: Just suffocate him with a pillow, thats what I do
Evil Ed Sheeran: Do that to me
F Goth: Gladly <3
M Goth: Tachihara stop flirting with my sibling.
Fancy Hat: WHEN THE FUCK DID YOU GET YOUR PHONE OUT
M Goth: Not important.
Evil Ed Sheeran: I swear you have a second sense when it comes to Gin....
F Goth: Uh yea? Of course he does
Evil Ed Sheeran: Im scared
Farmer Boy: Hey Guys! :D
Discord Kitten: Hi Kenji!
Farmer Boy: MR FANCY HAT IS HERE :OO
Fancy Hat: Sadly yes
Farmer Boy: Awwwww you dont wanna be here :(
Fancy Hat: Only because of a certain someone but dont worry kid
Bandages: I wish you were this nice to me.....
Fancy Hat: Fuck off
Bandages: :((((((
Discord Kitten: Wait arent we suppose to be working today?
Mr Holmes: Nope its a free day
Mr Holmes: Thats why I made this GC
Discord Kitten: Ohhhhhh Im guessing the PM aren't working too?
Fancy Hat: Im working from home, Aku is just here cuz hes having a crisis
M Goth: I am not.
Fancy Hat: I will send a picture of you right now.
Evil Ed Sheeran: Preach Chuuya
Fancy Hat: Dont even start Tachihara youre next
F Goth: This is why Chuuya is one of my fav
F Goth: Also cuz of our sleepovers
Fancy Hat: Youre still coming Friday right?
F Goth: Duh, our sleepovers are the best
Fancy Hat: Good
Evil Ed Sheeran: WHY DOES GIN GET TREATED NICELY
Evil Ed Sheeran: THIS IS TACHIHARAR-IST
Bandages: HELP WTF IS THAT
Sadist: Honestly I think hes on drugs
F Goth: He probably is knowing him
Fancy Hat: @Dsicord Kitten Youre also free to come Friday btw I forgot to message
Discord Kitten: Oh cool! Thanks Chuuya
Fancy Hat: I still find it weird that your one of the only ada member to call me Chuuya
Discord Kitten: Blame Dazai.
Bandages: YOUR MEANT TO BE ON MY SIDE ATUSHI
Librarian: Atushi... You arent seriously going to a Port Mafia Executives house for a sleepover...
Discord Kitten: Uhmmmmmm
Discord Kitten: No......?????????
Librarian: I cant with you people anymore.
Discord Kitten: Wait @Fancy hat Who is even going?
Fancy Hat: Tachihara, Gin, Higuchi(I think) and Aku sinces he been at mine all week already
F Goth: Tell that bitch to come home alreayd
M Goth: No.
F Goth: RYU ISTG I WILL BREAK INTO CHUUYAS
M Goth: FUCK OFF GIN LET ME STAY AT CHUUYAS ITS NOT LIKE YOU CANT STAY AT CHUUYAS
F Goth: Oh yeah
F Goth: Chuuya Im packing my things Ill be 20 mins
Fancy Hat: May as well have the fucking sleepover now
Probs Lesbian: Chuuya Im also coming round if thats okay, I need help with uh stuff
Fancy Hat: Ughhhhh Fine be quick though.
F Goth: @Probs Lesbian the real reason your coming is for Ryu
Probs Lesbian: NO ITS NOT.
Probs Lesbian: I NEED GENUINE HELP. I'LL PM YOU
Discord Kitten: Wtf is happening
Bandages: CHUUYA CAN I COME ROUND
Fancy Hat: Fuck no.
Fancy Hat: Everyone BUT YOU can come round
Bandages: :((((
Discord Kitten: Dazai get help...
Librarian: Agreed. He needs to get put in therapy
Bandages: NO. NEVER.
Fancy Hat: Babe I am legit gonna drag your ass out to a therapist and hold you to the floor until you speak to them.
Discord Kitten: BABE???? AYO WTF.
Librarian: Fuck this shit im out.
Bandages: .... Babe?
Fancy Hat: Suddenly my phone broke.
M Goth: Chuuya just threw his phone full throttle at the wall and it is actually broke.
M Goth: I DIDNT ACTUALLY FUCKING MEAN TO THROW IT THAT HARD - CHUUYA
Discord Kitten: Help wtf im cryng
Bandages: NOOO I HAVE TO TEXT AKUTAGAWA TO CONTACT CHUUYA
Bandages: Or i could break into his house.
M Goth: Bitch i have like 4 port mafia member at my house right now who want you dead.
Bandages: 4??????
M Goth: Aku, Gin, Higuchi, Tachihara
Bandages: When tf did tachihara get there
F Goth: Literally just now
F Goth: Atsushi you should come round ;)
Discord Kitten: ....what?
M Goth: No.
M Goth: Atsushi I would love it if you came round ;)
Discord Kitten: HELP WHAT THE FUCK
Bandages: ISHDIWHDHIFHEWOHFOEIHFWIFHOWEHFWHEWHFW
F Goth: HELP IM PISSING MYSELF
Evil Ed Sheeran: CHUUYA BREAKING HIS PHONE MIGHT OF ACTUALLY BEEN A GOOD THING AHAHDJDAJ
M Goth: Im gonna pull a Dazai move.
F Goth: Do it pussy. Chuuya has a balcony
F Goth: HELP HE ACTUALLY WENT TO WALK OUTSIDE AND GIN BODYSLAMMED HIM TO THE GROUND - CHUUYA
Discord Kitten: I WOULD LOVE TO SEE THAT
F Goth: You'd love to do that
Discord Kitten: ...
Bandages: Wow.
F Goth: WHATTTT WHO SAID THAT???? DEFO NOT ME GUYS
Discord Kitten: The fact i cant even tell if this is Chuuya or Gin anymore...
M Goth: Chuuya.
F Goth: And Chuuya is now wrestling Ryu????
F Goth: They getting a bit zesty holy shit
Mr Holmes: Huh Chuuya and akutagawa???
Mr Holmes: New ship unlocked!?!?!?! (NOT CLICKBAIT!!!!) (POLICE SHOWED UP!!!?!?!?!??!)
Sadist: Ranpo....You know I love you right?
Mr Holmes: Help you gave me ptsd flashbacks of what would have been my childhood
Sadist: RANPO ARE YOU OKAY?????
M Goth: ANyway hey guys Akus had his phone confiscated
Discord Kitten: why????
M Goth: Cuz hes being bad
M Goth: And hes in denial and wont admit it
F Goth: DENIAL IS A RIVER IN EGYPT.
F Goth: YOUR HUSBAND IS GAY.
M Goth: Bitch ik
Discord Kitten: You have a husband???????
M Goth: Next question or aku's phone gets it.
Bandages: Chuuyaaaaaa we wanna know
M Goth: ....
Evil Ed Sheeran: Help Im crying at that.
Bandages: Lolzies :P
MILF: Chuuya Im on my way with a new phone
M Goth: Did you fr just buy me a phone...
MILF: Yes?
M Goth: Ane san I legit have the money for a new one
MILF: idc i wanted to get you one so shut up and be grateful.
M Goth Thank you <3
MILF: <3
Bandage: I wish chuuya was like this with me....
Librarian: Dazai.
Librarian: Shut the fuck up about Nakahara already.
Librarian: I AM ON THE VERGE.
Bandages: suicide date....?
Mr Holmes: YOU DID NOT JUST ASK KUNIKIDA THAT
Sadist: HA AS IF HE WOULD SAY YES
Bandages: YOU GUYS ARE SO MEAN TO ME!!!!!
Sadist: <333
Bandages: ;,((
Murder Child: Atsushi where did you go?
M Goth: Totally not my house guys
Discord Kitten: uH....Ofc not....
Librarian: I want new coworkers.
Librarian: Praying.
Bandages: ON YOUR KNEES??? KUNIKIDA YOU SLUT.
Librarian: I will give you extra paperwork and make you work late if you say that shit ever again.
Bandages: ..... <3
Murder Child: Atsushi you did not just go to a port mafia members house
Discord Kitten: uh hahaha why would I eveR do that....
Murder Child: because your in love with one of them
Bandages: WOAH KYOUKA
Discord Kitten: KYOUKA WTF WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT
Discord Kitten: IT IS NOT TRUE.
Evil Ed Sheeran: Kicking my legs and giggling
F Goth: The fct that you actually are is fucking gold
Evil Ed Sheeran: ShHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
M Goth: IK WHO.
M Goth: BITCH I FUCKING KNOW WHO YOUR IN LOVE WITH.
Discord Kitten: NO YOU DONT WTF???????????
Discord Kitten: but also how....
M Goth: I have my ways
Bandages: Hi im his ways ;)
Discord Kitten: I havent even told you shit about if i like someone.....
Bandages: Hush my child... all will be revealed when you STOP BEING A PUSSY.
Discord Kitten: I AM NOT A PUSSY
F Goth: wellllllllllll......
Discord Kitten: Gin im gonna fuck your brother.
Previous message was deleted
F Goth: I saw that.
Discord Kitten: Nuh uh....
M Goth: What the fuck.
Discord Kitten: Please tell me that its still Chuuya........
Fancy Hat: Nope Ive got my new phone
Bandages: Damn this shit crazay
Evil Ed Sheeran: WHY IS AKUTAGAWA LOCKED IN THE BATHROOM AND ATUSHI SCREAMING
F Goth: uhhhhh priv chat babe
Evil Ed Sheeran: @Discord Kitten youve said it so may as well do it
Discord Kitten: FUCK NO.
M Goth: NO.