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Eddie's in danger.
He knows he's in danger because there is a four year old beelining for him, trying very hard to appear like she's not rapidly advancing towards him.
When Josie finally stops, she's right in front of him.
He has no idea what might've spurred this. Best to play it safe. “Hey, kiddo.”
Josie blinks innocently at him. A little girl in dungarees and her hair in pigtails shouldn’t be an intimidating sight… and yet. “You broked Steve's mug.”
Shit. The mug. It had been an accident—he'd balanced it too precariously when he'd been doing the dishes and it had slipped. They have plenty of mugs so it shouldn't have been an issue, except... it was Steve's lucky mug.
Steve loves that mug. He always drinks out of it if he needs the good luck that day and swears that it never fails him. If he sees it has broken, he'd take it as a sign of, like, the worst luck ever, and that would be the end of that.
The break had been clean, at least. The pieces are currently hidden away in a shoebox until he has time to get the glue to fix it. It'll be an easy enough fix, so Steve should be none-the-wiser.
Except.
“The luck mug,” Josie continues, presumably trying to raise an eyebrow but instead raising both of her eyebrows high up her forehead. It takes everything inside him not to snort at the sight.
“I'm fixing it,” he replies. Maybe this can be a lesson about white lies, or doing good, or something. There's probably a lesson here, right? “Steve won't know it ever broke.”
Josie blinks up at him again. “Be shame if he did.”
Eddie's smile fades. “What?”
“Be shame if Steve knew you broked his mug,” she repeats, fixing him with a stare that's oddly reminiscent of Erica.
Is he... is he being blackmailed by a child?
“Josie,” he starts, leaning forward so that they're eye-to-eye and taking on a desperate tone. “You can't tell Steve, okay? Nobody can know about the broken mug.”
She sighs heavily. It would be comical if not for the way his heartbeat has increased.
“I know," she says, shaking her head. “But maybe I not know.”
“Don't know,” he corrects, then squints. “What do you mean?”
“I know you broked his mug, Deedee.” Her tone is serious. “For Baby Sapphire, I not know. Baby Sapphire make it go—” She mimes an explosion with her hands, puffing out her cheeks. “Bye-bye.”
“Baby— What?”
Josie pulls out a crumpled catalog page out of her pocket and holds it out. On it, in the corner, is a small, bug-eyed, blue plastic horse labeled Baby Sapphire. It's the ugliest thing he's ever seen. The nose isn't even long enough for the horse to breathe. It's like the pug of ponies.
Eddie looks up, meeting Josie's pointed stare. It's a battle he knows he's already lost.
“Not a word,” he instructs, tucking the paper into his pocket. Josie brightens, beaming up at him, then skips away, merry as ever.
This is his life now. Blackmailed by a preschooler.
*
“Did you know Josie's resorted to blackmail now?” Eddie says offhandedly. He's lounging in the doorway as Steve chops carrots in the kitchen, watching Josie play with her new toy in the living room.
“Earlier than I expected, honestly,” Steve says, not looking up. “What did she have on you?”
Shit, he didn’t think this through. He thinks quickly. “Hmm? Oh, uh, not on me.” Eddie laughs awkwardly, shaking his head. “I watched her extort Mike earlier.”
Steve glances at him, frowning. "Mike's been out of Hawkins for two days."
Fuck.
“I think Robin's calling for me, actually.” Eddie backs away as Steve's eyebrows raise in amusement. “I'd love to continue this conversation, but, duty calls.”
“Robin's out with Max!" Steve calls as Eddie makes a hasty retreat to the living room. "You're fooling nobody, babe!”
Josie looks up as Eddie enters, ugly horse in hand. Moments later, Steve appears in the doorway, one hand on his hip.
“What did you do?” He swivels from Eddie to Josie, who only blinks innocently at him. “Josie, sweetie, what did Deedee do?”
Eddie stares at Josie, practically feeling the beads of sweat forming on his forehead.
Josie shrugs, still playing. “I no know.”
He's filled with relief. Steve doesn't look convinced.
“Are you sure?” he presses. “It's important to tell the truth, Josie.”
She stops, then, squinting up at him. “Always?”
“Always,” Steve says.
“Like when you said Bel eated Mama's food but it was you?”
Steve falters, mouth falling open.
“You what?” Eddie asks delightedly. “Stevie, you didn't blame our cat for eating Robin's leftovers!”
“Okay, you know what?” Steve holds his hands up in surrender, taking a step back. “Keep your secrets. Let's not ask questions anymore.”
Eddie's already laughing, though. “Steve, Rob almost took Bel to the vet because she thought she'd eaten fried rice!”
“I know!”
“And you offered to drive her there!”
“I know!”