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Buttons sat there, a limp flower held tightly in his hand. The petals had turned gray and dry a long time ago, its stem now wilted and faded into a dry green. Buttons’ eyes had no gleam to them like they used to, a dull brown replacing what used to be a bright mix of umber and hazel.
His pale fingers twitched every now and then, some of the only proof that the young adult was still alive.
Buttons now wore a lot of pants and long sleeve shirts. His face was always pulled into a grimace or frown, his leg always bouncing and his face always a ghost-white. He was quite thin now, not eating regularly even with JoJo taking care of him.
Buttons never wanted to look down. He was afraid he would catch a glimpse of the deep burn scars littering his arms and legs. Buttons never wanted to look in the mirror. He was afraid to see the stranger in the reflection, staring back at him with lifeless eyes.
He was afraid that even thinking about the scars would make him remember.
Buttons didn’t want to remember.
He didn’t want to remember-
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Buttons opened his eyes, grinning from ear to ear. Finch held him in a hug from behind, resting his head on Buttons’ shoulder. Albert was hugging him from the front, holding onto the fabric of Finch’s shirt.
It was his 17th birthday. April 20th.
Finch kissed his hair. “Happy birthday,” he whispered into Buttons’ ear.
Albert and Finch then pulled away, Finch still keeping physical contact with Buttons by holding his hand and Albert touching his arm lightly.
“We still have one last surprise- although it’s gonna take a short car ride,” Albert said, a smile on his face.
Buttons raised an eyebrow. “Really?”
Finch walked Buttons outside to their new car, something Albert got for his birthday 5 months ago.
The memory was too clear.
Buttons was sitting in the backseat with Finch, locking their hands together.
Little would Buttons know this was the last time.
It had been raining. Hard. But Albert was persistent to keep driving.
One moment the boys were singing along to “Francis Forever” by Mitski, Albert insisting on listening to Buttons’ favorite Spotify playlist.
The next, there was a loud blaring sound, piercing the ears of the 17 year olds.
A sharp turn.
When Buttons blinked, his vision was blurry and there was a ringing in his ear, blocking out any other noise. Buttons could barely feel the heavy rain drenching his clothes and pattering down onto his skin and new injuries.
Buttons could barely feel the stinging on the deep burns that now littered his exposed skin.
All he could see was Finch lying a few inches away from him, barely breathing with his eyes shut tight, raw burns exposed to the rain.
Where was Albert?
Flashing lights came in an eternity later few minutes later. Buttons was hoisted up by paramedics and rushed inside.
Finch was not brought in. Neither was Albert.
Though Buttons did remember seeing a tuft of red hair in the driver’s dashboard of the dented and burning car.
And all the boy could think was: Albert’s dad is going to be pissed.
Buttons cried. He woke up in the hospital alone only to be visited by JoJo a few seconds later, who was holding a bouquet of flowers. A sorrowful look painted his face.
“Where’s Al and Finch?” Buttons had asked.
“Albert and Finch are gone.” JoJo
had replied, his voice cracking.
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All Buttons’ friends could do was worry for him.
All Buttons could do was wait to see them again