Work Text:
Jax lay on his back as he stared up at the distant ceiling. His eyes scanned it, searching for the slightest change. It was the same as the last time he had studied it, and the time before that, and the time before that. He knew very well that it had never changed before, and that it never would.
His right ear twitched. He was getting restless. He wanted nothing more than to get up and go do something, but there was nothing to do. Everyone else was asleep. Everyone except for him.
Jax never slept. He just couldn’t, no matter how much he wanted to. He had made countless attempts, each one ending with him staring at the ceiling until his eyeballs burned.
This attempt was no different. He sat up after a while, frustrated by his inability to quiet his mind, and climbed out of bed.
He was quiet as he crept into the hall, the only noise being the soft patter of his feet.
He began heading down the corridor but was stopped before he had even taken five steps.
“Jax.”
Jax glanced up. “Oh, hey. ‘Sup, Caine?”
“You know why I’m here,” Caine said. “You can’t keep doing this. The others have complained.”
“I’m not doing any-“
Caine held his hand up to prevent Jax from finishing his sentence. “You don’t have to sleep if you don’t want to, but you can’t keep harassing everybody else.”
Jax scowled. “Fine. I’ll just go do something else then.” He tried to step around, but Caine moved to block him.
“Go back to your room, Jax.”
“But-“
“That wasn’t a suggestion. Go back to your room. It’ll do you good to spend some time alone.”
The rabbit shot Caine a nasty glare before deciding to retreat without a fight. He returned to his room, making sure to slam the door shut to express his dissatisfaction with the situation.
Jax glanced at his bed, briefly considering another attempt at sleep. He quickly decided against it and scanned his room to see if there was something else to keep his mind preoccupied.
His room had always been fairly empty. He didn’t normally mind, as he always spent as little time there as possible, but now he desperately wished for something to keep himself busy.
His eyes darted to the wall opposite the bed. There was only one object of interest there: a mirror.
Just glancing at the mirror made his fur crawl. He decided to approach it, wringing his hands as he did so. The mere thought of looking at his reflection filled him with dread. Of course he had a general idea of his appearance. He had seen his reflection many times in passing, but he had never looked, 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 looked at himself before.
So he did. For the first time, he studied the rabbit in the mirror.
He didn’t like what he saw. Everything about him was…wrong. Before he could determine the specifics of what was wrong, he heard a voice. It was quiet, almost missable.
𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘶𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝙜𝙡𝙖𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜.
Jax blinked, looking away from the mirror in surprise. He glanced around his room, only to find that it was just as empty as it always was.
He turned his attention back to his reflection.
𝘛𝘩𝘢𝘵’𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘺𝘰𝘶’𝘳𝘦 𝘴𝘰 𝘤𝘳𝘶𝘦𝘭 𝘵𝘰 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴, 𝘪𝘴𝘯’𝘵 𝘪𝘵? 𝘐𝘵’𝘴 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘸𝘢𝘺 𝘰𝘧 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧.
He checked the room again, clearly bewildered. He was still alone.
His eye twitched as he looked into the mirror once more. He hated what he saw. He hated the purple rabbit, with its long, stupid ears and its smug, infuriating grin.
𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵’𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳, 𝘑𝘢𝘹? 𝘋𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘭𝘪𝘬𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢 𝘳𝘢𝘣𝘣𝘪𝘵?
“No! I hate it! I hate being trapped in this ridiculous body! I hate being stuck in this terrible place!” he yelled, hoping that the voice would go away once he acknowledged it. “Why does it matter?! None of this is real anyways!”
𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘤𝘦 𝘮𝘢𝘺 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘣𝘦 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘪𝘵’𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭 𝘵𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 𝘐𝘵’𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘺𝘰𝘶’𝘭𝘭 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘳 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸.
“No.” He grimaced. “That’s not true. It can’t be true. I won’t accept that!”
𝘐𝘵 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴𝘯’𝘵 𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝘪𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘤𝘤𝘦𝘱𝘵 𝘪𝘵. 𝘐𝘵’𝘴 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘳𝘶𝘵𝘩, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘪𝘵.
He slammed his foot against the ground, expressing clear dissatisfaction with the voice’s taunting. “Who are you? Why are you torturing me?!”
𝘖𝘩, 𝘑𝘢𝘹. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘯’𝘵 𝘧𝘪𝘨𝘶𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘵 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘺𝘦𝘵? 𝘐’𝘮 𝘺𝘰𝘶. 𝘠𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘨𝘶𝘪𝘭𝘵, 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳 𝘧𝘦𝘢𝘳. 𝘌𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘯𝘦𝘨𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘱𝘪𝘦𝘤𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘮𝘢𝘬𝘦𝘴 𝘶𝘱 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘺𝘰𝘶.
Jax took a step back. “No. You’re not me. I know myself.”
The voice cackled, its cruel laughter ringing out through his head. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘺𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧? 𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘢 𝘫𝘰𝘬𝘦. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘢𝘳𝘦. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨.
“I know myself,” he repeated firmly.
𝘛𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘸𝘩𝘰 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦?
Jax froze. He couldn’t answer that. He glared at his reflection, gritting his teeth in frustration.
𝘞𝘩𝘰 𝘸𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘺𝘰𝘶?
He pulled on his ears, hoping it would shut the voice up. All it did was cause him pain. He continued glaring at the rabbit in the mirror, his anger growing.
𝘞𝘏𝘖 𝘞𝘌𝘙𝘌 𝘠𝘖𝘜?!
Before he even knew what he was doing, his fist struck the mirror. It shattered on impact, shards of glass flying through the air.
He glanced down at his hands as if he was confused by what had just happened. His yellow gloves were torn to shreds, yet his knuckles remained unscathed. There was no blood, not even a little scratch. Of course there wasn’t. He couldn’t bleed.
Strangely enough, he wished that he could. He wanted nothing more than to bleed. He wanted to feel something. He wanted to feel anything. Some assurance that he was really there. He wanted to prove that he was still the one in control.
𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘧𝘰𝘰𝘭. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘮 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘢𝘣𝘣𝘪𝘵.
It wasn’t fair. He should be in control. He should be able to harm the rabbit. He should be able to destroy the rabbit.
𝘕𝘰. 𝘠𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘬𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘳𝘢𝘣𝘣𝘪𝘵. 𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯.
There was a pause as the voice let its words sink in.
𝘞𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘮𝘦?
Jax looked at the mirror once again. The rabbit gazed back at him. It looked so very, very tired.
A flicker of movement caught his attention. The tip of his left ear was glitching. Then his right ear followed suit. The darkness was spreading, slowly creeping lower and lower.
He felt no fear. He was much too exhausted for that. There was only a sense of morbid curiosity as he watched the glitchy darkness continue its journey.
𝘞𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘭𝘦𝘵 𝘮𝘦?
The voice was kinder this time. It had an air of gentleness, as if it were speaking as a comforting friend.
𝘐𝘵 𝘥𝘰𝘦𝘴𝘯’𝘵 𝘩𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘩𝘶𝘳𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘺𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦.
He let his head drop, pausing for a moment as he felt the warm sting of a tear sliding down his cheek. He waited for more words, but none came. The voice was silent, waiting for an answer.
He took a deep breath, looking up to give the broken rabbit one final glance.
“Yes.”