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Inside Joke

Summary:

“Don’t steal my thunder,” Joyeuse said in his helmet.

John ignored her. He’d been waiting too long for this moment.

Notes:

I've wanted to do something with this idea since watching Forward Unto Dawn and Infinite finally gave me a setting for it.

Making liberal and probably non-canonical use of those time portals here. This whole fic is little more than an excuse for Chief to troll Lasky. Go with it.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

“Chief!”

“Captain Lasky.” John couldn’t keep all the relief from his voice as the captain’s hands clasped around his gauntlet.

“We always got to meet like this?” Lasky said breathlessly as he clambered out of the ravine where he and his people had taken cover.

“Are you injured?” John lifted Infinity’s commanding officer over the ledge.

“No.” Lasky planted his feet on the ground and released John’s arm. “Strangely enough.” He braced his hands on his knees and paused to catch his breath. “That was fast.”

John didn’t follow. “What was, sir?”

“You getting here.” Lasky stood upright.

Fast?

“Chief,” Joyeuse’s voice broke in for John’s ears only. “I don’t think they know.”

“I knew you wouldn’t leave us hanging for long,” Lasky continued, oblivious to Joyeuse. And, it seemed, the passage of time. “But I expected it to take a few days, at least. Did you pick up the signal from the life pod?”

John chose his words carefully. “How long have you been…” “planetside” didn’t seem to fit. “…here, Captain?”

“About twelve hours.” Lasky rubbed his sleeve across his forehead.

“Oh,” Joyeuse said quietly.

Seven months for us has been a day for them. John glanced to his left. The time portals.

Now wasn’t the time to explain. “There’s a forward operating base twenty kilometers from here."

Battered hope lit Lasky’s expression. “A forward—there are other survivors?”

“Yes, sir.” John spared the captain any details.

Lasky looked around John’s shoulder. “That Warthog’s not big enough for all of us.” There were six other Infinity crew milling about.

John felt a strange tingling sensation down his left arm. By now he knew that meant Joyeuse wanted to “come out and play” as Esparza put it. The Spartan opened his hand in a signal for the hologram to materialize.

“Hello, Captain Lasky,” the AI greeted from her perch on John’s palm.

Lasky’s eyes widened. “You’re--?”

“The AI formerly known as The Weapon,” Joyeuse said cheerily.

“I was going to say ‘still here,’” Lasky said.

“Reports of my deletion have been greatly exaggerated.”

“Her name is Joyeuse now,” John informed.

Lasky glanced between the hologram and the Spartan. “Right.” He looked back at John. “Where’s the FOB?”

“Echo. Twenty kilometers from here,” Joyeuse said.

“We can’t all fit in that Warthog,” Lasky said.

“I can call in transport.” Joyeuse snapped her fingers.

Lasky regarded the hologram with a bemused smile. “Bit of a show-off, isn’t she?” He said to John.

“The Pelican and the Warthog should be sufficient to transport the crew in one trip,” Joyeuse said primly.

“Thank you, Joyeuse.” Lasky inclined his head toward crew. “Let’s go.”

Joyeuse vanished and John followed Lasky. “We need to get to FOB Echo,” the captain announced. “We’ll regroup with there and figure out the situation.”

“I’ve called a Pelican for transport,” John told the crew.

“Don’t steal my thunder,” Joyeuse said in his helmet.

John ignored her. He’d been waiting too long for this moment. He turned his helmet toward Infinity’s commanding officer. “Captain Lasky. Can you drive a Warthog?”

Lasky blinked. The crew looked at each other. John stayed quiet.

“How long have you--?” Lasky narrowed his eyes at John. 

“Chief?” Joyeuse sounded puzzled.

Lasky put his hands on his hips. “You’ve been—you planned that, didn’t you?”

The assembled Infinity crew began exchanging glances and murmurs.

“How long?” Lasky asked again. “Requiem? Or have you been sitting on this since ‘26?” When John still didn’t answer, Lasky kept going. “Just now? Did you just come up with that now?” He paused. "Are you proud of yourself?"

John was, in fact, proud of himself, but he certainly wasn't going to admit it. The first one to speak would lose, and John-117 hated losing.

"Is this an...inside joke?" Joyeuse asked.

John resolutely didn’t break the silence. 

The Pelican swooped down and extended its ramp. The crew looked at the drop ship, then back at their captain.

Lasky huffed and gave in. “Yes, I can drive a Warthog.” He crossed his arms.

“Good,” John said curtly. “I’ll man the gun.”

Lasky, having mostly recovered his bearing, turned to his people. “I need one more person to ride with us and potentially take out any Banished.”

A blond-haired woman wearing a lieutenant commander’s stripes slowly raised her hand. Lasky nodded at her.

“Everyone load up,” Lasky ordered. “We’re headed to FOB Echo. Commander Dennison, with me.”

"Commander." John handed Dennison his rifle as she slid into the Warthog.

“Not gonna ask if she can shoot it?” Lasky harrumphed as he walked past.

“I—” Dennison turned wide blue eyes on John. “I can shoot, Chief.”

John nodded and jumped into the hog’s turret. He froze for a second as he watched Lasky working the ignition.

“Captain,” the Spartan called before he could get lost in memory. He waited until he had Lasky’s attention before delivering the verbal kill shot. “Leave any Hunters to me.”

Lasky scowled and started the Warthog. “Let’s move out,” he said without taking his eyes off John.

“We’ll see you there, big guy,” Esparza said over John’s comm as he took off.

“Captain?” The lieutenant commander asked hesitantly. “What does that mean? About the Hunters?”

Lasky put the Warthog in gear and faced forward. “Keep an eye out for hostiles, Dennison.”

“Yes, sir,” Dennison said, still sounding rather bewildered.

The Warthog began to move, following the Pelican. Lasky had obviously had some driving practice over the past thirty-five years, John noted wryly.

“Chief?” Joyeuse asked. “What did you mean about the Hunters?”

“Later,” John answered. He wasn’t expecting any Banished, but he readied the gun all the same.

"You are proud of yourself, aren't you?" 

Behind the helmet’s impassive visage, a rare full grin split the Master Chief’s face.

Notes:

Find me on Tumblr @authortobenamedlater or email me [email protected].

Really. Why has nobody in charge of Halo thought to bring that "can you drive a Warthog" line back to bite Lasky yet? It was the first thing I thought of when I watched FUD.

Joyeuse is my placeholder name for Weapon until Halo makes it non-canon. Then I will have an existential crisis over whether to call her Cortana whatever they name her.