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After the war, nobody wasted time in the start the next generation.
Because there's no time but the present, it was decided by Curt that everyone just stick together.
To help with the nightmares, and everything inbetween.
So they bought a farm in Wisconsin, they had animals, they lived off the land well contributing to the town. By working in it.
Now DeMarco has seen all of his friends pregnant at this point, it's gonna happen.
But the year of 1949, was a year to say the least. Brady was pregnant with the twins, Bucky was pregnant for the first time, Curt was pregnant for the first time, Ken was pregnant for the fourth time, does Rosie not believe in rubbers, not the point, Bubbles was pregnant with his first, Hambone was pregnant with his second, Kidd was pregnant with his third. One child off from Ken.
DeMarco swears they have a bet going, except Ken had a head start, with his oldest Jude being nine.
Helen was pregnant with her second, Quinn was pregnant with his first, Blakely was pregnant with his fifth. It's better you don't ask, DeMarco doesn't ask either.
So that year DeMarco made himself a guide to follow, just in case this hell happens again or they had guests over.
Which he fucking hopes this never happens again.
Number one: The main house on the property it's temperature is to be set at exactly fifty six degrees, believe me they know if it isn't.
Number two: Agreed to everything they say, because they are right and you are wrong.
Number three: Curt is not pregnant, don't remind him that he is, he's grouchy. Dickie learned the hard way.
Number four: Whatever you do don't bring up Bing Crosby, they have a vendetta against him.
Number five: Always keep every fridge on the property stocked with lemonade, they will make you feel very small if you don't.
Number six: We know Bubbles is on a crochet kick, just take what he's made you with a smile even if it's really bad.
Number seven: Whatever you do, don't touch the shredded cheese, that's Hams he'll go feral believe me.
Number eight: Keep all the restaurants in a fifty miles radius on speed dial.
Number nine: Remember their cravings, don't mix it up. Your great grandkids will regret it.
Number ten: When they say they want something, get it. Don't even think about. If Bucky wants to eat an entire tin of sour cream, don't stop him, just judge sliently.
Number eleven: Bucky can not eat raw steak, so don't let him Buck.
Number twelve: Pickle everything, even foods that aren't meant to be pickled, thank me later.
Number thirteen: Don't tell them how big they are getting, they'll kill you with the closest object, and they'll band together to murder you.
Number fourteen: Buy replacements of their favorite outfits, so they think they aren't getting bigger.
Number fifteen: If one starts crying, all of them will. They cry over everything, it's not you. It's just them.
Number sixteen: Don't buy or eat what they can't have, because they will glare you.
Number seventeen: Take turns with them, because you don't want them thinking you have a favorite. It's Bubbles obviously but shh.
Number eighteen: If one can't sleep, well nobody is sleeping.
Number nineteen: Sleep is for the weak, and people who don't have a pregnant husband, and friends.
Number twenty: They are pregnant, you are not which means. You are nothing but unimportant legs that can do something for them, just smile and nod.
Number twenty one: Smokey is not to be invited again, we almost lost him.
Number twenty two: Stormy is to be invited, he's the pregnant person whisper.
Number twenty three: You never shower alone just accept that, because either someone will butt in to throw up or a toddler will come in to throw toys at you, or someone will leave their infant in there with you, just accept that.
Number twenty four: If you have to go the bathroom, no you don't that's also for the weak. Because none of them in any house are ever open because someone is puking their brains out, or taking a seven hour bath, or there's a toddler taking a bath in the toilet.
Number twenty five: No you can't tell the children apart, because they all look the same until their four.
Number twenty six: If you hate germs, well you better leave that at the door. Because by the end of the day, your usually covered in something disgusting.
Number twenty seven: Coffee is a luxury, we can't have that because the pregnant ones are not allowed to have it.
Number twenty eight: Don't question the mystery stains on your outfit, it's either baby spit up or someones god awful craving spilled on you.
Number twenty nine: Just except the fact you'll never really be full, because someone will steal your food either a toddler or Bucky.
Number thirty: If you desperately need something but are to busy send Dickie, Buck, Douglass, Crosby, Harding, Rosie, Nash, Babyface, and or Winks. Because you aren't leaving ever again.
Number thirty one: There's no such thing as sitting down anymore, that's also for the weak.
Number thirty two: Know how to open jars, rookie mistake in the beginning, I made Ham cry because I couldn't open the garlic jar.
Number thirty three: Ham eats pickled garlic on everything, just hold your nose when he opens his mouth.
Number thirty four: Bubbles is afraid of noodles, because in the beginning of his pregnancy he ate noodles, his morning sickness didn't like that. Lets just say they came out of his nose.
Number thirty five: If you really wanna know what toddler you are holding slash taking care of, just ask Winks he'll Sharpie the kids name on its forehead. Don't worry he can do that. It's not like they'll remember anyway.
Number thirty six: The pregnant ones are no longer the friends you knew, they are possessed by little life sucking parasites, so whatever they say or do to you on accident. It's not them remember that we'll survive this.
Number thirty seven: Don't make them cry, you'll feel like you murdered their entire family.
Number thirty eight: Don't neglect your pregnant one, or they'll be mad at you for a week. Brady I said I was sorry that I painted ducks instead of geese in the nursery it's a common mistake.
Number thirty nine: Make sure to ask them the same question at least five times, because they change their minds.
Number forty: Again you are wrong, they are right. Even if Bucky thinks Argentina is a state, don't correct him, yes it is obviously we've all visited.
Number forty one: You'll be tying so many shoes slash boots, that you start doing it in your sleep. Just accept that.
Number forty two: If they want a massage, either find their lover or just submit.
Number forty three: Being sick is also for the weak, your sick all the time, just ingest as many cough drops as you possibly can, and pray you don't get worst. Because the entire system will be in chaos without you.
Number forty four: Kidd is independent, don't do anything for him, he's absolutely amazing. He'd be my favorite, but Bubbles bakes.
Number forty five: If you want Bubbless baked goods, you have to plan ahead. Because nothing baked lasts more than two hours on this farm.
Number forty six: Meatball is the practice baby, much to Meatballs dismay. Just make sure to give him extra treats.
Number forty seven: Let them wear whatever they want, if Quinn wants to wear slippers out don't protest. If Blakely wants to wear a cowboy boot and a sneaker let him have it.
Number forty eight: Yes Ken is glowing, but don't remind him, he'll throw something at you.
Number forty nine: Helen is incredibly sensitive, don't even breathe near her.
Number fifty: Most important rule of all, this only lasts for a few more months. It's a magical time, and remember it's about to get a lot worse.