Chapter Text
“Okay, try this! You’re working on a science project testing parachutes, but all the eggs you were using to test have been damaged due to Orgaluth’s Law,” Milo said. “What do you do?”
“Eggs? Why would I be using eggs? Those things weigh a ton!” Orgaluth said.
“Really? What do eggs look like on Octalia?” Milo asked.
Orgaluth pulled out her mobile phone and showed Milo a picture of a perfectly round egg with spots. If the Octalian in the picture was meant to be the reference point, the egg was at least ten feet in diameter.
“I will say that if I ran out of my usual test subjects for a science project, I would find an object of similar size and/or weight,” Orgaluth said. “For example, if I was using plates, I would probably switch to bowls or cups. Just not my mom’s good stuff.”
“Excellent!” Milo said.
“Wow. You really think of all this stuff all the time?” Orgaluth asked.
“I like to imagine scenarios and think of what I would do in them,” Milo said. “A lot of what I do in response to Murphy’s Law is just based on past experiences.”
“I’ve loved hearing your stories, Milo,” Orgaluth said. “I’m surprised you didn’t destroy half of your town due to Murphy’s Law.”
“Well, I did cause some significant damage to the football field a couple of times,” Milo said. “All things considered, Orgaluth, I don’t think the Sphere of Calamity did too much damage. Look at how well everything was rebuilt in three days.” Milo gestured around him and Orgaluth. The two of them sat on a bench in the downtown area, watching the Octalians put everything back together after saving Orgaluth from the Sphere of Calamity.
“Eh, it’s just because we have more arms and legs than you humans. We can get rebuilding done in way less time than you,” Orgaluth said. “Don’t ever try to play dodgeball against one of us.”
“You should try playing against a Murphy. Somehow, I always inadvertently win,” Milo chuckled. He heard a loud whistle, and he and Orgaluth turned to see Melissa waving to them.
“Hey, Milo!” Melissa called. “They got the ship all fixed! Time to go!”
“Aw, already? I was going to challenge you to a dodgeball match,” Milo said.
“We’ll find another time,” Orgaluth said. “You should get home. I bet your family misses you a lot.”
“I miss them, too,” Milo said.
Milo and Orgaluth followed Melissa to the launch pad for the newly rebuilt and repaired spaceship. Orgaluth’s mother barked orders to the Octalians who were checking over the ship and stocking it with supplies. Most everyone was already on the ship, and Milo waved as he approached a few of the Octalians.
“Okay, so we reinstalled the thrusters and fueled it up. We also added more airbags and restocked the emergency supplies,” Loab said. “We’re also sending you off with some snacks and drinks that your human bodies can digest.”
“I’ve also packed extra toilet paper in case you can’t digest something,” Khone added.
“Gross. But thanks!” Milo said. “You sure it’s okay if we take your ship?”
“We had already written it off as scrap metal the first time it crashed,” Orgaluth’s mother said with a shrug. “I’m impressed you humans could figure out how to piece it back together. If you need to contact us, use the speed dial on the emergency phone. I’m just sorry we can’t join you to help you get home.”
“I wouldn’t want to accidentally strand you guys away from your planet. Besides, you all need to learn how to work with Orgaluth’s Law,” Milo said.
“I can teach them about that,” Orgaluth assured, hugging her mother. “Then again, things will be a lot tamer around here, all things considered.”
“Yo, Milo!” Zack called from the ship. “I think we got just about everything! Your backpack packed?”
“Restocked and ready to go!” Milo said. He bid the Octalians one last farewell before joining his friends on the spaceship.
“Everyone get in a seat and buckle up!” Cavendish ordered.
“The takeoff ramp should get us out of the atmosphere faster than just flying straight up, but it could get rough when we hit those clouds,” Dakota added.
“Can’t be any rougher than what we’ve dealt with before,” Melissa said as she, Milo, and Zack buckled themselves into a few chairs.
“I still don’t see why I can’t help with the flying controls!” Doofenshmirtz complained.
“Because you caused us to crash last time,” Cavenpus droned. Agent P chittered in agreement, and even Diogee woofed to concur.
“Boy, you crash a spaceship one time,” Doofenshmirtz huffed.
Cavendish switched on the spaceship, and it began to shake a little. The engines whined as they came to life, and Cavendish very carefully maneuvered the controls to send them forward. The ship went slow, and then gained speed, faster and faster until the Octalians waving goodbye outside the front window were only a blur of colors. The ship rocked and shook like it were on an old roller coaster, shooting up the ramp and going vertically straight into the sky. The ship hit a few bumps of turbulence as it went through the clouds, and then the rusty orange skies gave way to a blanket of black full of stars. Everyone cheered, thankful that the only bit of Murphy’s Law that hit was Milo’s seatbelt coming loose (which caused him to fall to the floor during the turbulence).
“Setting a course for Earth!” Cavendish announced. “Estimated travel time: ten hours, forty-three minutes, two seconds.”
“Yeesh. Anybody bring a deck of cards?” Zack joked. Everyone laughed as Milo pulled out a deck of cards from his backpack.
With the ship coasting easily in the vast expanse of space, Cavendish and Dakota took care of steering while the kids started on a game. Doofenshmirtz and Cavenpus soon joined them out of boredom, and Agent P kept Diogee occupied so the dog wouldn’t get into mischief. The card game ended when the cards inexplicably caught fire, so Milo told the story of how he got to Octalia and his friends explained what they had to do to follow him.
“How does an alien carburetor cause boneless-ness?” Milo laughed.
“No idea. We really should have just used a shovel or something,” Zack said.
“Oh, yeah. I haven’t punched you for that.” Melissa punched Zack in the shoulder. “Milo, it really took you, like, six spaceships to get here?”
“Murphy’s Law had a field day. But now that I’ve seen a lot that can go wrong, I’m doubly prepared!” Milo said this just in time for a pipe to come loose and start spraying steam everywhere. In a flash, Milo had the tools out to fix it with some help from his friends.
“Hopefully, we can keep this rust bucket going until we get home,” Dakota said.
“We got this. We’ve handled way weirder,” Melissa said.
“Truer words were never spoken,” Cavendish agreed. “I suppose we should land this thing in the Danville Woods so we spook less people.”
“We’ll worry about where to land after we get into Earth’s airspace,” Dakota said. “Gee, I hope Mr. Block doesn’t think we just up and quit.”
“Uh-oh. I think I left the keys in the van. Hope it doesn’t get stolen,” Doofenshmirtz said.
“Who is going to steal a van full of garbage? A raccoon?” Dakota joked.
“Yes,” Doofenshmirtz said seriously. “Happened to me twice.”
“Twice?” Cavenpus asked.
“Yeah, yeah, fool me twice, shame on me, whatever,” Doofenshmirtz said.
Milo glanced out the window. The ship was still moving along, passing stars and asteroids. Small planets could be seen in the distance. “Home is pretty far away, isn’t it?”
“Maybe. But at least we’re together,” Melissa said, hooking her arms around Milo’s and Zack’s necks to pull them into a hug.
“Yeah! We just saved an alien planet. Flying back to Earth in an alien spaceship is going to be a walk in the park,” Zack said.
“Plus, we brought snacks this time!” Doofenshmirtz said, holding up a bottle of Octalian soda. The top suddenly popped off, dousing Milo, Melissa, and Zack in the fizzy drink. They gave Doofenshmirtz deadpan stares. “Oopsie.”
Milo sighed with a grin. This was going to be a long trip.