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Connor was afraid of a few things. He couldn’t stand roses, snow made him anxious and blizzards were a hard pass, zen gardens didn’t bring him peace, and heights were not his cup of tea. Oh, and the name Amanda put him on edge.
Maybe it was more than a few things.
Regardless, he’d been getting better at talking through his ordeal with Amanda, whether that was with Hank, Markus or the DPD on-site therapist – Connor hadn’t known they had one until both Hank and Gavin had spoken about her in a similar capacity.
As he mulled over what he felt comfortable talking about, Nines handed him a case file and informed him of some details. The two androids and their respective human partners were all working on the same case for once and this had brought up some interesting facts about everyone involved; particularly that Nines had no idea who Amanda was. After a quick conversation to smooth out the confusion, it turned out that Nines had been woken to deviancy before the Handler Program could finish its activation sequence, so Amanda was nothing more than a few lines of code that had yet to be activated. She was easily deleted from Nines’ system. Sadly, the same couldn’t be said for Connor.
Although he had pushed her back twice now (once when he’d deviated and again when he’d found the Back Door that Kamski had created), there was always the lingering dread that she was still somewhere in his head. Connor hadn’t gone back to the Zen Garden at all since the day of the Revolution, too frightened of the memories that were still raw enough to sting when he prodded at them. He’d woken from stasis with her face burned into his UI and her voice echoing in his audio processors too many times to count and it always left him feeling unstable for a long time afterwards. Sumo helped a little with that though.
There was also the issue of the recent glitching in his system. At first it was moments when he missed a word or two that someone said. Then whole minutes of his memory went blank. His vision had been flickering to black and coming back crackled around the edges before it corrected itself. It was…unsettling. Connor had mentioned this to Hank when the lieutenant caught it happening, who had then suggested if it was something the therapist could help with. He’d asked Helena, but she hadn’t been much help in the end because it sounded more like a tech issue than a mental one. She had said that they might be related though and given him some extra techniques to level out his anxiety.
It worked for about a week before things started to become more of a problem. The glitches were affecting his information recall too, and his reconstruction program was having difficulty engaging. Nines took over most of the work instead and Fowler ordered him off the case until he was better. Connor knew better than to protest but Hank sympathised with his desire to continue.
“Go home, Con. I’ll see you soon.”
So Connor went home. He said hello to Sumo, went about his usual routine when he finished a shift, and sat on the sofa with his coin flipping between his fingers. What had at first been a calibration tactic was a calming technique. It was comforting with its familiarity, one of the only things of Before that he didn’t mind holding onto. It was so comforting, in fact, that it lulled him into stasis before he had chance to recognise it.
---
The Zen Garden greeted him peacefully with a light breeze. Connor didn’t want to be here, yet here he was and he was stuck with it. It was quiet as he walked over the bridge, watching the fish in the lake flash in the artificial sunlight as they swam away from his shadow and something resembling peace settled over him. It…it was nice here, now that he could look around and take it in properly. The lattice that usually held roses instead had simple vines covering it with not a bud in sight. Connor breathed out slowly and relaxed. It wasn’t as bad as he’d feared.
At first, because of course nothing could go right for Connor today.
One snowflake drifted in front of his eyes, then another, and suddenly his vision blinked out. Barely a second had passed before it was back and now a blizzard had covered the Garden. Connor stumbled, caught off-guard, and stuck out a hand to grab onto the bridge railing to keep himself standing. Something sharp punctured the skin and scraped against plastimetal, causing Connor to yank his hand away and look at the damage.
A small thorn was stuck in his hand. A rose thorn. At this realisation the scent of roses burst around him, panic rising in his chest because he knew what this meant, what it had to mean.
[AMANDA IS WATCHING]
[STRESS LEVEL: 78%]
Connor pulled the thorn out and threw it away into the winds, his feet tripping on the bridge and landing him in a deep snow drift that was too soft to support his weight. He began to sink into the snow and the further panic of his thirium pump being right there and liable to freeze made things start to glitch around him again, the frozen lake breaking apart and moving away from where Connor lay next to the bridge.
The glitching only got worse as minutes passed and soon enough Connor couldn’t hear anything over the howling blizzard winds and the screams of the girl that had run across the highway. Alice, his memory belatedly told him. The blue glazed eyes of Daniel – you lied to me, Connor – and the cries of Emma floated around him and it was then that Connor noticed how dark the Zen Garden was this time around. It had broken into floating islands, the edges fizzing into static and jittery blocks of colour, and the snow wasn’t snow at all but his memories compressed into tiny specks. They whizzed past his face with sharp snippets of words or sounds.
A gunshot.
“The fuck are you doing?”
Wings fluttering by his face.
“You are lost.”
A child screaming.
“They’re going to attack Jericho.”
Cold…so cold.
“Plastic prick.”
Something was approaching him. Something dangerous. He had to get away but he was stuck in the deep snow and still sinking even as the surface of it was beginning to solidify around him as he stood on trembling legs. His panic rose further, stress levels already in the eighties and climbing and it didn’t help that he couldn’t see the Exit. Last time he’d been able to see the blue glow through even the densest parts of the blizzard, but right now it was just a void that surrounded the snow.
The something got closer. Connor held his simulated breath.
“H̴͙͓̺̻͈̘͒ẽ̶̳͇̳͈̌̽̏͑̽̈̏̓̔̐͜ḽ̸͇̮̥́̊͑͐͋̊̾͐̉͝l̷̼̯̭̞̰̝̭̥̬͕̠̎̋̆̏̎͒̍͆ō̵̡̱͙̬̋͌̈͗̀̄͐̉́̾ ̴̳̤̬̟̯̝̦͖̀̇́͒̂̽͗͘̚͝ͅC̴̜͌̃͒̇̉͑̂̆̋̍ǫ̶̧̫͓͈͈̬͙̝͈̟͆̅̿̏̽̆̾͛͝͠͠ǹ̴̡̩̞͔͕͔̌n̴̘̮̩̈́͌̈́̈́̊́̏̿͆̒͜͠ͅò̵̡̝̳͓̮̟͈r̶̩̳̠̳͒͑̿̌͛̄͂ͅ ”
He couldn’t speak. He couldn’t move. He could barely see or feel, yet the broken voice with faux sympathy and the piercing gaze of a disappointed mother sent stark, paralysing terror through Connor’s entire system. The howling wind had been silenced but the snowy memories continued to steadily drift down. His gaze wavered as it landed on Amanda, her entire form phasing in and out of existence, between blocks and flowing material, between glitch and solidity. Her image was broken but her presence was too real. She scared him like this more than she ever had in reality and as he struggled the get away from her image, the snow gave way and sent him hurtling into the dark abyss, tumbling head over heels in disorienting cartwheels.
He was drowning in his fear of Amanda and what she could make him do, choking on simulated tears and false breaths, watching the androids he’d murdered bleed out as their systems shut down.
“G̵̫̫͛̆̔̆̄̑̈́͂͘͝ḯ̷̢̨̠͔̭̼̙̘͔̮̫͖̏ͅv̴̯͎͒̑̚e̴̛̪͗̊͋́̉̌́̉̔̕͝ ̷̨̟̮̩̟̋̊͗̊̓ú̷̡̢͓̳̲̳̟̬̦̖͙̗͓ͅp̷͔̬̫̣̳̈͊̀̆̀̕ ” Amanda whispered in his ear. ‘Give up the honour you’ve been wrongfully bestowed. Give up the faith the humans have in you. You don’t deserve that.’ She was going to take over his program again. She was going to rewrite everything, get everyone killed, and it was going to be his fault for not stopping her here. He’d be a ghost in his own program. A wraith left to fade away.
Connor’s breath was knocked out of him when he landed, winded from the fall with warnings flashing in his eyes about sudden shock to his biocomponents and the stresses on his endoskeleton. His stress level was up to the nineties, rocketing from the force of the fall and the wet feeling underneath him. Wet and sticky and blue. Blue blood. Thirium.
Why-
“Ď̷̡̯͖͇̣͇̹̰̩͔ỉ̶͇̊͌͂ę̵̡̙̠͈͐̌̿͛͋͜ ̶̨̡̛̦̹͔̭̘͇́̀̓̌̊͌̇̆̚i̸̯̦̣͔̩͎̊͌̀͌͜n̶̛̫̦̘̗͎̯̖̝̻͊̏͛́̏̓̔͠ ̷̡͖̱͎̻̍̽̎̂̈́́̃̾̋̕ţ̸̍̂̈́h̶̼͇̘̦̞͈̺̻̯̦̾̽̚͝e̴͖̟̣͗̈̅̚̕ ̸̧̢̰̮̖̳̻͉̒͘b̸̨̗̫̗̓̽͗l̶̮̻̮̲̐ơ̴̰͉̣̺̤͙̱͖̐̕͝o̴̙̱̫̓̒̽͋̐͋̾̓ͅď̶̹͊͊̊̅̿̾̈̉͠ ̶̻̲̣̒͂́̌̆̈́͗͝ŵ̴̛͚͕̝͖͑́h̵̬̦̩̘͙̐͋͛͆ë̶̟͉͎̠͓̗r̸̨̧̘͙̗̊̀͋e̸̮͍͍̼̥̭̹̰̾̈́͑̍̅͐̇̕͠ ̷͕̮͖̈́̽ÿ̴̤̗̤̮̤͉̟̥́͒̀͑̿̕ͅő̸̩̖̅͆͘u̶͎̎̈̂͠ ̶̩͕͇͉̏͑̈́̊̋́́̀̈́b̴̡̢̧͕͇̮̺͙̈̂̎͌̐͛̓̑͠ą̴͎͈̦̤̞̆͂͂t̸̨͈̂̓̆h̶̥̯͌̌̊͘ę̷̭̦͚̹̾̅̿.̶̛̟́̒̓͆͛̍̑ ”
There was a musical quality to Amanda’s words that Connor couldn’t decipher right now and to be perfectly honest he didn’t much care. He just wanted to get out, to go home, to never have to deal with this nonsense ever again. He was tired; tired and terrified and in too much pain to initially notice that the thirium was rising to cover him entirely. His sensors noted, unhelpfully, that the thirium around him was specific.
PL600 – Daniel
WR600 – Ralph
AX400 – Kara
RK200 – Markus
WR400 – Traci
YK500 – Alice
WB200 – Rupert
No, that wasn’t right. He’d seen some of those androids recently.
‘But they could be dead now too…’
Daniel had been shot on the 70th floor of the Park Avenue building by the SWAT team. He should have seen that coming.
Ralph was the android with the mutilated face, the one who’d helped Kara and Alice (who were safely in Canada, so he’d been told.)
Connor had let the Traci’s go free from the Eden Club and the abuse they suffered.
Rupert had escaped when Connor stopped to save Hank, although he had eventually revealed that by jumping off the roof he’d smashed his face in.
Markus was the leader of New Jericho. Connor had seen the man a few days ago safe and well.
‘You put them in danger. They could all be dead because of you.’ They’re not dead. They’re alive.
Their voices rang out in unison: “We must do what it takes to survive.”
The words displayed themselves in CyberLife Sans, floating in the deep blue pool that Connor found himself within. The thirium surged into his nose and mouth, flooding through his system and biocomponents, red warnings bright in his vision once more as his processors failed to keep the viscous liquid from overwhelming him. Androids weren’t made to handle that much thirium and his circuits began to crackle as they were coated in the stuff.
Amanda’s broken visage entered his sightlines once again, her voice nothing more than broken static but the words she spoke were familiar and haunting.
“W̵͔̮̳̤̬̼̖̏ȩ̶̛̹͚͖̮̰̭̱̌͂̎̒̐̆͂͠ ̸̢͇̰͔̳̪̄͋̓͐̐̒͛̚͘m̵͚̯͖̳̱͕̥͑̓̈́ͅǘ̸̡̧̙͕̲̭̖͇͓͋͠ș̴̡̽́̉̕ẗ̵̨̹́̈̇̈́͆͑̾͑͐ ̴̬̊͆̕͠ḍ̶̦̝͚̣̙̂͜o̵͗̏͜ ̴̛͈̻̯͍̣͗͐͂w̵͔̭̗͇̣̘̆̉̆̀͑̏̆̕͝ḥ̶̖̻̮͈͎̈͛͜ą̴̨̪̿̋̈́͒t̶̡̯͙͖̮͓̝̋̏̃̇͌̆̉̚ ̵̛͉͍͙̮̠̥͙̤͂̐̎̓̾̾͜ì̴̢̡̜t̵̖͇͓̻̲̫͉̠̑̎ ̸̨͓̻̪̝̫̒̂̋͜t̵̡̗͇͉̗͚͇̟͑̔̃͊͛͌͒̚â̶̳̔͒̇͛̍͠͝k̶̺͚͔̼̞̽͜e̵̛̥͚̬̦͖̯̦̽͐͑͌̚̕ş̵̱̪͍͈͉̬̹̓̃̑͆̍͝ ̴̡̡̆́̿̿̀͒̏̕̕t̶̢̖͎͍̣̖̼͌͒̐͗́͋͐̇͝o̵̢̟̞̩̮̩͉͠ ̶͉̪͖̝͓͉̔̎̋̓̽̍̈́̕̚s̴̡͔̣͚̈́ͅṵ̵̙͓̞̼̻͂̐̒r̵̨̻̳̬̘͌͜v̴͓̬͉̗͓͔̙̑ͅi̴̡̙͖̼̣̋̋̋̋͋̃̓͠v̶̟̆̑̿̐͝e̸̢̞̻̗͓̥̣̍̿̀̍̓.̶̙̰͇͕̣̙͔̟̦͆̀ ”
It dawned then what she meant. CyberLife did anything it took to get the deviants under control, even if that meant controlling their deviant hunter in the process. Connor shuddered at the memory of waking up for a second time with his gun pointed at Markus’ head, only this time he had no recollection of how he’d ended up like that. It had been a miracle that North had been forgiving.
“Connor!”
The small voice held urgency that made Connor pause in his thoughts. It was another familiar thing, but warmer than his tormenter.
“Can you hear me, son?”
Of course he could, but his voice had stopped working hours ago.
“Come back to us, Connor.”
That…that was Hank. The man who’d let him in. How could he forget Hank?
He had to get back there; away from the snow and the blood and the memories. Away from Amanda and that simpering smile she had. Away from the roses.
Connor pushed his way through the thirium invading his system, batting away warnings that told him any physical exertion would make things worse, and broke through the surface into the snow-ridden Zen Garden. He hauled himself through the snow, limbs shaky and slow, weighed down by the thirium pooling in his feet and hands. More warnings alerted him of finger dexterity and limb coordination being lost due to flooded circuitry, sending the android crashing back down into the snow.
He got up again. And again. And a third time.
He would do whatever it took to get out of this nightmare. Find the Exit, wake up back at home, take Sumo for a walk, and maybe write all of this down for a later discussion. He would survive. Amanda’s words – so similar to his thoughts – came back to him and he paused, momentarily suspended with the realisation that she wanted to same thing: whatever it took to survive. Her voice floated to him again, glitching and uncoordinated but still holding the lilting, musical quality from before.
“W̵̱̳̟̜͎̲͐̊͠e̵̡͖̜͌ ̴̯̽̂͑͒̓a̵̡̪͖̰̪̙̓̾͠r̵̢͇̙̾͌è̶̗̝̑̓̎̄̍̐ ̶̢̦̝̭̮̏̅͒͘͘t̵̗̼̻͉̬̱͍͉̑̀̓̀̂̓ĥ̸̰̮̯͉̞̪͗̑̀̔͒̕e̶̠̞͈͆̑̄̎̀ ̴̨̮̥̈̓̈́̉̕͜s̶̟̯͓͘͠ȧ̴͎̦͕͈͍͍͎̌̑́̂̕m̷̨̱͇̖̟̗̈́e̶͗͑̽͜,̸̨̺̩̜̹͚̅̓̕ ̸̲̖̻̻̈̋ÿ̷̡̥̻̠͈̺̙́̔̔o̶̩̜̺̍͋̀̏͑͘̚ú̷̡̟̯͇͇̦̌̀̿̒̔͌ ̸̡̡͉̦͑̎̐̈́̑̍̚á̵̼͙̩̰̈͂̕ǹ̷̻͎̫̦̝͙ͅd̶̗͉͎͉̤͙́͗ ̷͖̭̻̃͛͛̄͋̆Ī̸̖̥͕̉͌̀͠ͅ.̷̨̬̪͓͋́ͅ ”
Her voice echoed on, the phrase repeating itself in a loop. Connor tried to fight off the exhaustion in his limbs, finally seeing the gentle glow of the Exit panel, but it was like her words weighed him down a hundred times more than thirium logged biocomponents ever could. They were the same. Connor and Amanda. Amanda and Connor. A joint package from Day One. How was he supposed to function now that she wasn’t there to study his every move? Connor’s mental turmoil was reflected in the Garden, the snow blindingly white with Amanda’s voice repeating her final phrase into infinity, and the android himself was knelt in the drift he’d originally broken free from, staring through the ground. Connor could feel his consciousness slipping through his fingers like water and he shook his head to fight for it, fighting to stay awake.
“Connor?”
A new voice brought him back into the moment briefly and Connor slowly lifted his head to look up at who it was, feeling heavy from the amount of thirium that had entered his mouth and nose. He could only blink sluggishly in surprise at the sight of Nines, perfectly put together and standing neatly on the surface of the snow.
Shouldn’t he be sinking by now too?
“I’m here to get you out,” the younger android clarified, holding out his hand towards Connor and retracting the skin. “We can go together.”
He almost shook his head – it wouldn’t work, surely. Not with Amanda still rattling around somewhere in his code, not when he was drowning under the pressure of the thirium clogging every wire he had, not when he could infect Nines with this corrupted file as well.
“I’ll be fine, I promise,” Nines smiled lightly, like he’d known what Connor had been thinking. He hoped Nines was right, dragging his right hand up to meet Nines’ left and letting himself be lifted out of the snow drift. Memories tinkled off his trousers like shards of glass. His hand flickered to white and connected with Nines, the other android simply serving as an anchor and not prying into Connor’s head. He appreciated it.
Holding back the encroaching darkness of shut down by keeping a tight hold of Nines’ hand, Connor allowed himself to be guided to the Exit, but even as he stood there he hesitated. He’d get out of there, yes, but Amanda would stay. He needed to purge her from his system for good this time. Nines was saying something else but Connor couldn’t hear him, too focused on finding Amanda before she found him. He stepped away from Nines and the scenery shifted alongside his thoughts, pulling together the swirling mass of emotions he’d felt since the moment he deviated.
Amanda’s image flickered into being, still in that white dress she always seemed to be in, a beacon in the darkness. Connor grimaced, his anger with the nightmarish AI starting to build in earnest.
She would drown in his fears.
She would choke on the blood he’d spilled and the tears he’d shed.
Amanda would become the wraith and fade away into nothing more than a bad memory.
She had to go. Permanently. The shock and betrayal on her face filled Connor with some satisfaction, his own voice now barely more than a whisper itself.
“We both know what it takes to survive.”
Pillars erupted from the ground like serpents, biting at Amanda with the ferocity of rabid dogs, impaling the AI and shattering the program as Connor pivoted and slammed his hand onto the Exit.
---
Connor’s eyes snapped open and he snatched his arm out of the loose grasp it was in, not registering the separation from Nines. His hearing hadn’t come back yet and his vision was blurred, but he had enough sense to know that he was still sat up on the sofa where he last remembered being before…
“Amanda…” he murmured under his breath, the blur clearing up slightly when he blinked. His hearing resumed and he could hear the stuttering breaths that had to be coming from Connor himself. As the pieces of what had happened clicked into place, the stress warning appeared again.
[STRESS LEVEL: 90%]
[SEEK CALMER ENVIRONMENT]
His whole body shook violently, waves of fear crashing through his system, and he pulled his legs up to his chest to curl into a ball. The nineties threatened self-destruction.
[STRESS LEVEL: 92%]
[SEEK CALMER ENVIRONMENT]
[WARNING: VENTILATION ERROR]
[INTERNAL TEMPERATURE EXCEEDS RECOMMENDED LEVEL]
He had to breathe. If he didn’t he risked shutting down (or worse) and that would give her plenty of opportunity to strike and hurt the people around him. Breathe and everyone would be fine.
But he couldn’t breathe anymore – androids don’t need oxygen to survive – and he couldn’t feel his hands but he did hear the coin slip and hit the ground with a light ‘tink’. His body was going numb and numb equated to cold and cold was a bad thing-
Another voice came through his thoughts.
“We have you, Connor. You’re safe.”
The voice counted methodically as he tried to cool his overheating systems and- that’s right. He wasn’t freezing solid after all. Connor followed the counting carefully, painfully aware that this could be Amanda trying to get back in, frighteningly alert that his nerves were frying along with his circuits.
[VENTILATION RESTORED]
[INTERNAL TEMPERATURE DROPPING]
That was a good sign. With his breathing levelling out, he finally realised who was doing the counting.
“Nines?”
The counting paused. “Yes?”
“Thank you.”
Connor sensed a smile. “You’re welcome. Would you like me to continue?”
“Please.”
So he did just that, and Connor relaxed in the rhythm of it. He listened to the sounds outside his head too: the murmured conversation between who he assumed to be Hank and Gavin, the slow thump of Sumo’s tail and his breaths nearby as he watched over the two androids, the rain pattering against the window, and the slow breathing of Nines that he now tried to match. He felt the nod of approval from Nines and allowed himself a slight smile at doing something right.
“It’s not the doing something right that I approve, Connor.”
It…isn’t? “Then what is it?”
“It’s the fact that you are much calmer now than when we found you.”
Oh. That made more sense. “I suppose I just feel like I need to do something right anyway.”
“The need to please seems to stem from Amanda.”
“I…disappointed her often.”
“Was she angry with you?”
“Not explicitly, but it always felt like she was.”
“Maybe this is something you should bring up with Helena.”
“Yeah, maybe…”
“Would you like to disconnect now?”
“I…” Connor paused. On the one hand his breathing was back in regular rhythm and his systems were cooling, but on the other hand it was comforting to have a kind presence connected to him that wasn’t overwhelmingly compassionate for once.
“Let me rephrase that: would you rather I disconnect now and you can speak with Lieutenant Anderson, or would you like me to stay while you talk?”
Connor exhaled slowly. “Stay. Hank wants to talk to me?”
“He said to ask you if you would be willing. Are you?”
Lifting his head off his knees, Connor caught sight of Hank and Gavin sat at the table. They stopped talking when Connor moved. He looked back at Nines and saw the steady trust he knew he could count on.
“Yes.”
Nines gave him another small smile and slid his hand down to hold Connor’s, his skin rippling as it followed the connection. Both androids turned to the humans and Hank stood, going to sit at the other side of Connor. Gavin, to his credit, stayed where he was. It only took a soft look from Hank for Connor to fall into him, holding tightly to the first person to have shown him any form of real kindness. He relaxed into the familiar scent of bourbon and Sumo, almost missing the hushed conversation happening above him between the other three in the room.
“What the fuck happened?”
“It appears that rogue elements of the Amanda AI remained within Connor’s memory, laying dormant until it had enough to strike back with.”
“So he…kept hold of it?”
“I cannot say for certain, but it’s possible.”
“Why the fuck would he do that if he knew how much it fucked with him last time?”
“Fuck off, Reed.”
“I don’t believe Connor knew she was there, Gavin.”
“I’m still here, y’know.” Connor mumbled into Hank’s shirt before he turned his head to look at them, pulling a soft huff of amusement from the lieutenant. “I can hear you.”
“Sorry, Con. Just tryna figure out what went on there.”
“And if it’s gonna happen again, because if you infected Nines I swear-”
“I’m fine, trust me.”
Reed narrowed his gaze at Nines but seemed to accept his answer. “If you say so.”
“I do.” Connor could feel the smug attitude through their connection and had to hide a smirk. Reed noticed anyway.
“I hate you.”
“You love me.”
Reed rolled his eyes – fondly? – and before Connor could speculate on it Hank spoke up.
“If you’re gonna argue or whatever kind of flirting it is you two do, could ya do it away from my house?”
Reed stood, giving Connor one last glance – concern? – before nodding to Hank and walking out. Nines took a little longer to leave, checking that Connor was definitely alright with disconnecting before he too went out the door. The sound of a car driving off signalled their departure for good. Connor sighed softly when he felt Sumo rest his head on his legs and Hank wrapped his arms around the android a little tighter.
“I’m sorry.”
“Shut up Connor, you don’t apologise for this shit.”
“Feels like I should…”
Hank gently lifted Connor’s head to get the android to look at him. “Listen to me, son. You do not under any circumstances ever need to apologise for being traumatised by something. Alright?”
Brown eyes met blue ones, both tired and feeling a little more vulnerable than they were comfortable with. “Ok, Hank.”
“Good. We can set you up with Helena tomorrow.”
“I already have a session scheduled for next week.”
“Earlier might be better on this one.”
Connor thought about this for a moment, then nodded in agreement, making a note for himself to contact Markus as soon as possible about getting a good look through his program files to make sure any trace of Amanda was definitely, absolutely, permanently deleted.
He did whatever it took to survive, but he wasn’t the same as her.
And that was the best thing he could think of.