Chapter Text
my love, mikołai
xe surprises me at times. xe's so cool, and a very admirable/adorable girl/boy/someone. i like the way xe talks. xe's so cute,, i cant explain.. basically everytime xyrs existence becomes active. i get this.. boost.
like a power-up. in a way im so dazed by xem, that everytime we speak my heart jumps a little. i feel like im not good enough for XEM. because xe's genuinely so perfect.
the way xe loves me regardless of my flaws, the way xe talks about me when xe feels "gay", even the way xe affectionately cussed me out and calls me names. i admire every part of it.
the way someone like xem likes my voice, appearance, and general existence.. is already a big shock emoji. xe likes me, xe called me boyfriend, xe reffered to me as "him".
i could ramble on about xem. the way xe talks, i also adore. i love the way xe talks shit about problematic people,, its just in the way xe speaks.. its so attractive. ngl../srs
i cherish xyrs existence, for xem to willing love me and love every part of me, is something id die for. i would carry a torch for xem, light xyrs path with my commitment and admiration i have for them.
i would lead xem if xe would ever get lost. i would help xem get up if xe had a difficulty standing up. i would treat xem with care and patience if xe had a bad day. i am fully committed.
i want for xem to feel my love. i want xem to know i love them every single day xe plans to stay with me. i will be a good spouse/husband/wife(??),, whatever xe wants, ill bring to xem.
i want xem to know i care, i care about xem every day. i wake up and the first thing i do is check if xe texted me. if its not the first thing i do, than i do it immediately after.
my care for xem goes beyond both out knowledge. waking up knowing xe'll be there (even if virtually.) is the only true love i need.
niko, MY niko,, the moon i stare at at night, the stars that i look at in awe, the peaceful wind which mends together with my oceanic waves.
i love xem. so much even my words, actions, and behavior cant even BEGIN to describe what i feel for xem. xe's so smart. even though xe might not say it xyrself.. "kaizi im not smart, its called intelligent."
regards, i dont care.. xe's smart. extremely. im not bluffing. xe may not be good at school, nor mathematics.. but xe knows a somewhat about space and a whole lot about geography.
xe's smart. even if not academically. xe is special in xyrs own way, and i like xem that way. plus besides, im not the smartest either.
regards if xe isnt considered smart, i find xyrs amount of knowledge truly jaw-dropping. i love xem truly for xem. any word xe says makes me smile and any joke xe makes makes me giggle.
xe fills with happiness. i love xem eternally for existing. xyrs existence means everything to me. just a sigular hi could brighten my day.
and i say that about a person who thinks no one truly cares about xem. i dont how to prove it to xem, i can declare it. but i care for xem more than the earth spinning cycle matters.
i care for xem like xe is my face/hair. i care for xem a lot. and i want to make xem know that. make it known to xem that i care, that i love xem.
thats why im writing this, in the end i plan to send this.. maybe on xyrs birthday if we make it that far, or even new years.. i dont want to aim too far. all i want is for xem to read this one day.
i love xem because i CHOSE to love xem. i dont love xem because xe's "my partner". i love xem always, regards if xe is my lovey or not.
(august 12th)