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Samael coughs into his elbow. He pauses in his walk through the abandoned store until he can catch his breath. Rayne pops up behind him.
“Are you alright? You look flushed.”
She puts her hand on his cheek, and he almost immediately shakes her off.
“Don’t do that.”
“You hesitated. You must be running a fever.”
“Rayne, can you leave me alone?”
Ogre meows in his ear and he sighs.
“Can you both leave me alone please?”
“Sam, your face is really red now.”
“That’s because I’m annoyed. Did you not get that part?”
Rayne rolls her eyes.
“We should find somewhere to hole up until you’re feeling better,” she suggests, folding her arms.
Samael ignores her, continuing to look through the shelves.
“Sam.”
Ogre cuts her off with a hiss. Then he meows in Samael’s ear. He pats Ogre’s head while Rayne is silent. She splits off to look on one of the other shelves. Samael sighs.
“Man, I never say the right thing, do I?”
Ogre purrs, knocking against his ear. He continues looking through the store even as his vision begins to waiver slightly. Ogre purrs in his ear, as if to get his attention.
“I know, I know.”
He leans against the shelves, taking a deep breath.
“I’m fine, buddy. Thanks though. We have to keep moving, can’t stop now.”
“Samael, did you find anything?” Rayne calls.
“Yeah, I did. I found some medical supplies to refill our first aid kit. I also found some bottled water. What have you found?”
“Nothing really. Just a few cans of beans, but it’s only four.”
“Ok, grab it and we’ll head out.”
“Ok.”
They meet back out front. Rayne puts the food in the back while Samael opens up the first aid kit to finish filling it. His vision tilts again, and he has to grab the back of the car to steady himself. Rayne practically appears next to him.
“Are you ok?”
“I don’t think so,” he admits, still holding his death grip on the car.
“What should I do?”
“I don’t know. Maybe look around for somewhere that we can lay low for a while? Just be careful, ok?”
“Yeah, I’ll be super careful, and I’ll be back really soon.”
Samael just nods, putting his head lightly against the trunk. He ends up sitting on the concrete by the car, praying that no one is nearby to jump him.
Yeah, I would definitely be in no shape to fight someone off. Damn, I was really hoping it was nothing. Well this is what happens when you’re as self destructive as I am. I put everyone that I love at risk.
He shakes his head even though it sends stars across his vision. Tears fill his eyes as Ogre starts to butt against his hand. Samael runs his fingers through Ogre’s fur, trying to ground himself. It’s only as the cat starts rumbling underneath him that he’s able to pull himself out of his thoughts.
“Thanks, buddy. You know, you’re the only one who’s always been there for me. Thank you.”
Rayne runs back up, kneeling beside him as soon as she reaches his side.
“Samael, are you ok?”
“Yeah, I just thought I’d take a breather. It’s ok, it’s ok.”
Rayne flitters around, not touching him, but seeming completely unsure of what to do.
“Come on, I found somewhere that’s pretty put together. We can stay there until you feel better, but we shouldn’t stay on the street.”
Samael nods again, then closes his eyes tightly against the dark spots. Once he opens his eyes again and his vision is clear, he pulls himself to his feet. Rayne grabs his arm as he tilts to one side. Ogre meows at Samael, but he doesn’t respond. He just lets Rayne keep a hold of his arm as she leads him to the apartment that she found.
Once inside, she barricades the door while Samael drops onto the couch. His head is spinning now, and his face feels really hot underneath his hands.
“Samael, don’t go to sleep yet. I’m going to see if I can find any Tylenol or something around here.”
“Did you grab the first aid kit? It should have some in there.”
“No, I forgot,” she admits sheepishly. “Just stay awake until I come back, yeah?”
Samael nods, even though he’s not sure that she’s looking at him. He forces his eyes to stay open and on Ogre as he waits on Rayne to come back. He can hear her rustling around in another room. Ogre hops onto the arm of the couch to watch Samael too. Samael reaches out to touch him, but his hand falls just short.
Tears fill his eyes. Pain, exhaustion, and the fever all force him to the brink. Ogre hops off of the arm into Samael’s lap, but that doesn’t stop his tears. They continue to fall down his face, dripping onto Ogre in the process. Rayne appears in the doorway, immediately freezing upon seeing Samael.
“What happened? Are you ok?”
“I’m fine,” Samael replies, rubbing his face harshly.
“Here.”
She holds out the pills. He takes them dry before she can even offer him something to take it with. Rayne sits down beside him before he flop onto his back. She tugs on his shoulder, pulling him into her lap.
“You can go to sleep,” she whispers as Ogre repositions. He presses against Samael’s stomach as Samael relaxes into Rayne’s hold.
“Why are you like this?” Samael asks.
“I’m not sure. Why are you so self destructive?”
“I don’t know either. It’s not like it really matters anyway. We’re all going to die at some point, and that some point isn’t going to be that far from now.”
Rayne hums.
“I guess that’s where we think differently. I don’t want to die.”
Samael mumbles something, but it’s not loud enough for her to hear. She puts a hand in his hair with a small sigh.
“Just get some sleep, you’ll feel better when you wake up,” she whispers, looking down at him softly.