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Sunday
Dinner
January 18, 1976
The Great Hall is a buzzing sensation as Severus dragged his body up the stairs from the Slytherin Common Room. Many voices speak through and over each other as every single one of them wants to be heard. A new rumour, or simple excitement for the winter break to finally be over. Classes will continue that Monday, though few people are for that.
Severus slowly, mindfully of his broken and bruised body, sits down at the end of the Slytherin table; far enough away to not catch anyone’s attention, but not so far away that he becomes an even easier target for the other houses.
Conversations pass over him, and at some point there is such a ruckus at the Gryffindor table, surely Potter is telling everyone of his heroic deeds, that McGonagall sees fit to do something about it. Not that she ever does when it matters.
“You should have seen him! Snivelling all over me, he was scared enough to piss his pants. And for what?! A wild animal howling in the night. Now he has detention for the rest of the month, serves him right, right Remus?”
Severus tries to block out the grating voice of James Potter, but was unable to keep the many, many eyes of every single person in the Great Hall from looking his way. Taking in the way he is hunched over, eyes still puffy and red from crying hysterically for hours, there’s nothing there to disproof Potter’s words. Like there is nothing he’s capable of saying, permitted to tell, that would disproof it.
“Mr Potter, that’s enough. No need for such words, there is no reason for you to celebrate another student’s detention, no matter if it serves him well.”
The Slytherins that were sitting close enough by to get caught in the cross-fire carefully shuffle a bit farther away from him on their seats. Slughorn will not stand up for them, and when McGonagall gets angry no one will think she is not rightfully so. Better to not be associated with the person that caught her wrath.
Luckily for Severus does McGonagall not say anything else, but let the Marauders continue with their speeches of grandeur. Even Remus, normally silent or straight up disapproving of their taunts laughs along, though his face too twitches with aches from last night.
It doesn’t make Severus feel any better, to know he is not the only one in physical pain right then.
When he leaves the Great Hall to disappear for the rest of the night in the Common Room, he is surprised to see he is being followed. He would have thought that they were done with him, what else had he to give that they hadn’t taken already. The silence of Remus during the meal more condemning that anything Potter yelled for all to hear, Lily sitting next to him with a pitiful look on her face, but her mouth shut tight.
“Hé Snape!”
Severus gets pulled into a dark alleyway, something he would have rejoiced about a week prior, but now only cold dread is pressing down on his stomach.
“I don’t know nor care what you did to Sirius, but it has to stop. At some point someone is going to get seriously hurt, and is a little schoolyard rivalry worth that to you?”
Remus doesn’t wait for an answer, he has said what he wanted to and leaves Severus heaving in the alcove behind. Because what else is there to say? If they continue like this at some point a golden boy will be hurt, and that better not happen now.
The words of the Headmaster resound in Severus mind: ‘Now, it wouldn’t do for anyone to find out about this. It could ruin their future, and for what? A school rivalry? A scrimmage that could slightly out of hand? No it is better of we all forget about it and leave it behind, and to make sure of that I need you to swear it. Swear on your magic that you will not tell a soul about what has happened tonight, or I will send the law after you, expel you from Hogwarts and break your wand. Am I understood?’
Severus sinks down until he is sitting on the floor with his back pushed flat against the wall. The only thing keeping him tethered to the earth as the reality of all that is lost finally settles in.
The illusion that he is not alone forever broken apart.
Sunday
One hour after sunrise
January 17, 1976
Poppy is the one to tell him what has happened. The one to look him in the eye and tell him he has become the monster of his nightmares.
Not Padfoot, who tries to make it into some kind of joke. Despite the fact that they are in the Hospital Wing and the evidence of their actions is lying in a bed on the other side of the room.
He throws up, when he notices the body for the first time.
Not Prongs, who has managed to keep his smile steady all throughout Remus frantic pleas for answers. The first one to break and to make a suggestion, the first one to say that it’s no one important and Remus shouldn’t worry himself so much minutes after his transformation.
He checks, extends all his senses to catch the slightest breath, a heartbeat, from the body whose face he won’t dare look at.
Wormtail is sleeping in a chair by his bed, he doesn’t even care enough to be awake during Remus’ darkest hour and he doesn’t know why he is surprised.
This time when he looks over he cannot go around the fact that he knows that inky black hair strewn over the with pillow. Can’t get around the fact that he has seen it before, just like that, woken up to the sensation of the hair tickling under his nose.
Pomfrey has to sedate him after she tells him what has happened.
When he wakes up the Marauders are gone and the sun is shining high in the sky.
All the other beds in the Infirmary are empty when the Headmaster tells him that his secrets are safe.
Tells him that he has spoken to the other student, and that they will no longer bother Remus.
He remembers, not that he can, he knows that is not how the transformation works, but he remembers that look of pure horror and understanding just before his muzzle clamps down on the defenceless flesh of the wizard standing in front of him.
The Headmaster continues droning on about safety and that Remus does not need to worry about legal repercussions. He doesn’t care.
“Please,” he interrupts the Headmaster before he can speak again about the immature student who won’t speak about Remus’ secrets. “Make me forget.”
Friday
Afternoon
January 16, 1976
“I’m sorry I missed your birthday.”
Sirius is walking down the hallways when he hears a familiar voice coming from behind the door of a disused classroom. And as he can’t think of anyone that they know whose birthday fell during the holidays, and they had already congratulated, he does what any good friend does and sneaks closer till his ear is pressed against the keyhole of the door.
“But I do have a gift, you have been asking about it for quite some time and I think, I think I’m ready.
Whoever is behind that door must be someone important, yet for his life Sirius can’t think of anyone Remus could be interested in. Which is on one hand great news, yeah Remus is finally dating, and bad news, oh no who could it be.
“You didn’t have to do that, you are more than enough.”
His blood runs cold in his veins as the voice register, and before he knows what he is doing Sirius stands up runs down the hallway and then loudly yells for Remus to show his face. Not his finest moment, but it has the desired effect. Remus walks out of the classroom, red faced and clothes far too crumpled for Sirius’ liking.
“James needs you in the Common Room, it’s an emergency.”
Remus doesn’t question his urgency, but walks back towards Gryffindor tower leaving Sirius alone in the hallways. It doesn’t take long for the door to open once more and Snivellus’ big nose to appear from around the corner.
Sirius lets the Slytherin get a head start before he follows him down to the dungeons. With some quick thinking he manages to get in front of Snivellus, making it impossible for the snake to run.
“Do you want to know to who Remus disappears to every month? Then go to the Shrieking Shack tomorrow evening.”
He doesn’t wait for Snivellus to react, but runs back to the better parts of the castle.
After tomorrow will everything return to the way it was. Everything will be like it’s supposed to be.
The natural order of things.