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Leon stood at the cell door, with his hands on his hips, and wearing an expression of disappointment that only a mother had any chance of mastering. Looking back at him were the sheepish faces of his closest friends…and Gwaine. The lot of them made a truly pitiful sight locked up and huddled together in the small cell, but he knew they’d done it to themselves.
Jail time was the unfortunate consequence of wrong doing in a foreign land.
“What do you call disobeying the law?” Leon asked sternly.
“A hobby.” Gwaine replied.
Leon crossed his arms over his chest and glared at them menacingly.
“…that we do not engage in.” Lancelot finished for him. Leon knew he was lying, he could smell the dishonesty. He cast a side eyed glance at Merlin, because he knew, but that would have to be a discussion for another time. A time when they weren’t on thin fucking ice with another kingdom.
“To disobey the law is to commit a criminal offense, resulting in punishments that can vary from spending a bit of time in the dungeon, to execution, depending on what crimes you commit. As you damn well already know.” Leon said through gritted teeth.
“Ah.” Was the only response he got.
“Yeah, and you lot are so lucky that Queen Annis merely views you as naughty school children and not the menaces to society that you are. Or else your little escapades would have caused a bit more than embarrassment to Camelot and the loss of my dignity.” Leon seethed.
“It wasn’t that bad…” Merlin tried to reason. He failed to reason. He failed so hard.
“You ransacked the kitchens and pilfered most of the treats, hid the swords of the entire army, vandalized a tavern, and then you set a guest chamber on fire. I assure you it was that bad. How she finds you little shits amusing is beyond me!” Leon snapped, accusation filling his tone.
“I-“ Arthur started.
“I don’t want to hear it! Queen Annis agreed to let you off the hook in exchange for an apology in front of the court!” He shouted.
“An apology?” Percival parroted.
“An apology.” Leon confirmed.
An hour later found Leon standing behind his hooligans in the grand throne room of Caerleon’s castle. The knights (and Merlin) stood in a horizontal line with their heads bowed in apology. From this view he could almost see why Annis treated them like children, rather than the full grown men they actually were. They had a look to them, of childlike innocence, but they were neither innocent, nor children. These men had been on countless battlefields and bore witness to many horrors in their lives, to view them as children would be an insult to their lived experiences.
Leon was brought out of his musings by the sound of shuffling feet. He turned his attention back to his companions to see them hesitantly moving closer to the Queen. She offered them a kind smile in response.
He caught sight of Sir Kay and Sir Bedivere in the crowd and was disappointed but entirely unsurprised to see the pair cooing at the merry band of trouble makers. Honestly, was he really the first knight? Or just a glorified babysitter? Either way, he needed a fucking raise and two shots of tequila.
“We offer our sincerest apologies for all the trouble we caused, your majesty.” Elyan said shyly.
“We’re sorry.” The rest said in unison.
And just like that, Leon felt his frosty demeanor melting away. While he knew they weren’t children and most would say they shouldn’t be treated as such, a part of him quietly hoped that his friends would never lose that spark of childhood whimsy that was still living within them. Maybe they needed their inner children in a way that others don’t.
He could think about that later, for now he needed to focus on the preparations for their journey home. Bags needed to be packed, payments for stolen and damaged goods needed to be made, farewells were to be said, and he had to make sure their group was properly outfitted and armed. For the love of the triple goddess, if one of them forgets their sword one more time-
The party arrived home with little fanfare. They only squabbled the entire way there. And for some reason Queen Annis asked him to send her something called a “Christmas card”?