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Humanity 13 May 1543
Not sure if @Earth revolves around @Sun or @Sun revolves around @Earth
Mars 13 May 1543
@Humanity lol, u serious?
Sun 13 May 1543
@Humanity Everything revolves around me, naturally. Even @Earth. :)
Humanity 13 May 1543
@Sun Not trusting strangers on the internet. Will figure this out on my own. :D
OutsideObserver 13 May 1543
@Humanity Yeah, don't trust'em. @Sun is an egocentric dick.
OutsideObserver 13 May 1543
@Humanity @Sun Or should I say ~heliocentric~ dick? ;-p
Humanity 13 May 1543
@OutsideObserver Who are you?
OutsideObserver 13 May 1543
@Humanity You'll have to figure that out on your own.
Humanity 13 May 1543
@OutsideObserver I see what you did there. #ChallengeAccepted
Humanity 7 Oct 1609
OMG, using a telescope to look at the sky! It's AMAZING!
Saturn 7 Oct 1609
@Humanity A what?
Humanity 7 Oct 1609
@Saturn Light refraction thingy. Science! Looking at you right now :D
OutsideObserver 7 Oct 1609
@Humanity Creeper.
Humanity 10 Jan 1610
@Saturn Are those moons?
Saturn 10 Jan 1610
@Humanity Huh?
Humanity 10 Jan 1610
@Saturn You've got three moons!
Saturn 10 Jan 1610
@Humanity Look again...
Humanity 13 Jan 1610
@Saturn No wait, four! Four moons!
Saturn 13 Jan 1610
@Humanity Getting warmer, but... Whatever, why do I care.
Humanity 13 Jan 1610
@Humanity Grumpy much? But I just realised, this means that not everything revolves around @Earth. Or @Sun. Huh.
OutsideObserver 13 Jan 1610
@Humanity D'oh.
Humanity 11 Nov 1654
@Sun I know how old you are! 2050 years!
Sun 11 Nov 1654
@Humanity ORLY?
Mars 11 Nov 1654
@Humanity @Sun lol noob
Humanity 11 Nov 1654
@Mars @Sun What? It's true!
OutsideObserver 11 Nov 1654
@Humanity Don't tweet while drunk...
Humanity 11 Nov 1654
@OutsideObserver I'm not drunk :(
Humanity 23 Aug 1655
@Saturn has appendages :D
Saturn 23 Aug 1655
@Humanity ???
Humanity 23 Aug 1655
@Saturn Looks like ears!
Saturn 23 Aug 1655
@Humanity What a human concept...
Humanity 31 Aug 1655
@Saturn Oh, it's rings. You've got rings! That's pretty cool.
Saturn 31 Aug 1655
@Humanity Ah. I guess you can call them that.
Humanity 3 Mar 1664
@Sun What have you done? It's cold!
Sun 3 Mar 1664
@Humanity I didn't do anything...
Humanity 3 Mar 1664
@Sun It's been 2 degrees colder than usual. :(
Sun 3 Mar 1664
@Humanity 2 degrees? lol
Humanity 3 Mar 1664
@Sun That's a lot for me. Does it have anything to do with you having less spots than usual?
Humanity 21 Mar 1664
Yeah, I bet it's @Sun's missing spots #ImCold #VeryCold
Earth 21 Mar 1664
@Humanity Awwww
Humanity 4 Apr 1665
@Jupiter You've got a big red spot on your surface.
Humanity 4 Apr 1665
@Jupiter That thing must be huge! o.O
Jupiter 4 Apr 1665
@Humanity Everything about me is huge ;-)
Humanity 4 Apr 1665
@Jupiter I'll never be able to unsee that... :(
Humanity 15 Jul 1687
Okay, I think I've got the gravitational laws figured out.
Humanity 15 Jul 1687
Coming to the conclusion that all planets revolve around the sun. #HeliocentricModel.
Sun 15 Jul 1687
@Humanity :D
Humanity 15 Jul 1687
Still not sure how light works though.
Sun 15 Jul 1687
@Humanity Light is just light. What's so hard to understand about it?
Humanity 15 Jul 1687
@Sun Well, is it particles? What are they made of? Is it waves? Waves of what? Or is it something else entirely?
Sun 15 Jul 1687
@Humanity You have a tendency to over-complicate things, if you don't mind my saying so. The universe is quite simple, really.
Humanity 15 Jul 1687
@Sun You're having me on, aren't you? Because it looks anything but simple to me...
Humanity 13 Mar 1781
Wow, first I thought it was a star, and then maybe a comet, but @Uranus is a planet! How exciting!
Humanity 13 Mar 1781
Hi @Uranus! Nice to meet you! :)
Uranus 13 Mar 1781
@Humanity Hi!
Humanity 13 Mar 1781
@Uranus You're not @OutsideObserver, are you?
Uranus 13 Mar 1781
@Humanity Nope.
Humanity 1 Jan 1801
Oh, that's a huge asteroid orbiting the sun. @OutsideObserver, is that you? #Ceres
OutsideObserver 1 Jan 1801
@Humanity Warm, but no ;-) #NiceTry
Humanity 5 Aug 1846
OMG @Uranus, are you drunk?
Humanity 5 Aug 1846
@Humanity Err, what?!
Humanity 5 Aug 1846
@Uranus Your orbit is doing really weird things. How can it do that?
Humanity 5 Aug 1846
@Humanity No idea what you're talking about...
Humanity 7 Aug 1846
Oooh! Maybe this means there's some huge object close to @Uranus! #GravitationalLaws ftw
Humanity 23 Sep 1846
Ha, gotcha! New planet @Neptune, hi there!
Neptune 23 Sep 1846
@Humanity I'm not new :-/ #LookWhosTalking
Humanity 18 Aug 1877
Oh, I suspected @Mars would have moons. Didn't expect them to be so tiny though #Phobos #Deimos
Mars 18 Aug 1877
@Humanity size isn't all that matters. at least i have two, that's one more than @Earth has. and two more than @Mercury and @Venus ...
Mercury 18 Aug 1877
@Mars :( :( :(
Humanity 31 Aug 1877
I might have said something stupid in the past about @Sun's age... It seems that the real age is closer to 5 billion years #JuvenileMistakes #Sorry
Humanity 14 Sep 1877
OMG, @Mars has canals! Does that mean there's life on Mars?!
Mars 14 Sep 1877
@Humanity certainly not!
Humanity 14 Sep 1877
@Mars Not sure if I can trust you. You look dry, and I bet the #Martians are dying to conquer @Earth! D:
Mars 14 Sep 1877
@Humanity u trolling?
Humanity 14 Sep 1877
@Mars The canals are probably built to get the last remaining water from the polar caps. And @Earth has all the water. It all makes sense! #Martians
OutsideObserver 14 Sep 1877
@Humanity @Mars Well this looks like fun. BRB getting popcorn
Humanity 28 Dec 1896
There's something funky going on with @Neptune's orbit as well. Maybe there's another planet?
Humanity 4 Feb 1906
Yeah, pretty sure it's another planet. Search for #PlanetX begins! :D
Humanity 10 Feb 1906
Oh, just got an idea. #PlanetX <-- @OutsideObserver is that you?
OutsideObserver 10 Feb 1906
@Humanity Not bad, not bad. Maybe I should rename myself...
PlanetX 10 Feb 1906
@Humanity There. But you still haven't found me yet ;-P
Humanity 10 Feb 1906
@PlanetX Soon... :)
Jupiter 10 Feb 1906
@PlanetX Aren't you a little megalomaniac?
PlanetX 10 Feb 1906
@Jupiter And you're a failed star. So, shut up and let me have my fun. #YOLO
Humanity 4 Sep 1929
I'm searching and searching, but still no sign of @PlanetX... :(
Humanity 13 Mar 1930
Ha! Found you, @PlanetX! Or should I say #Pluto? ;)
PlanetX 13 Mar 1930
@Humanity Okay, okay. No sense in hiding anymore...
Pluto 13 Mar 1930
@Humanity But what do I look like?
Humanity 13 Mar 1930
@Pluto No idea... But I will find out!
Humanity 18 Nov 1950
I'd say @Pluto is about 5,900 kilometers in diameter.
Pluto 13 Mar 1930
@Humanity If you say so...
Humanity 4 Oct 1957
Shooting things into space = great fun! :D :D #Sputnik
Humanity 23 Sept 1958
Damn, that one failed. #Luna #Soon
Humanity 23 Sept 1958
Oh hey, this worked. Sort of. Missed @Moon though... #Luna1 #GettingThere
Moon 14 Sep 1959
OMG @Earth! What did you do?! You shot something at me! What is it?!
Earth 14 Sep 1959
@Moon I didn't do anything. Maybe you should ask @Humanity...
Humanity 14 Sep 1959
@Moon Oh that was me! :D I wanted to find out more about you. #Luna2
Moon 14 Sep 1959
@Humanity Oh. Well then. Have fun, I suppose.
Humanity 7 Oct 1959
@Moon I AM having fun. :) Taking pictures of your dark side right now. #Luna3
Moon 7 Oct 1959
@Humanity My ... dark side?
Humanity 7 Oct 1959
@Moon The side facing away from @Earth, doh.
Moon 7 Oct 1959
@Humanity That's not darker than the one facing @Earth... I'm starting to see the appeal of this, though.
Humanity 11 Apr 1961
Humans in spaaaaaace! #Vostok1
Mars 11 Apr 1961
@Humanity o.O and you were afraid of *me*?
Humanity 11 Apr 1961
@Mars I still don't quite trust you, just so you know
Humanity 14 Jul 1965
Taking pictures of @Mars! These are the first photos from deep space of another planet! Whee! #Mariner4!
Humanity 15 Jul 1965
Well, looks like there's no life on @Mars after all. #Mariner4
Mars 15 Jul 1965
@Humanity told you so...
Humanity 15 Jul 1965
Next up: @Venus! :D
Mercury 15 Jul 1965
@Humanity WILL YOU SEND A SPACE PROBE TO ME TOO? I WANT A SPACE PROBE! #FOREVERALONE
Pluto 15 Jul 1965
Aww, poor old @Mercury's inferiority complex strikes again.
Mercury 15 Jul 1965
@Pluto SHUT UP. AT LEAST I'M A PROPER PLANET. YOU OTOH SHOULDN'T BE CALLED A PLANET!
Humanity 20 Jul 1969
Visiting @Moon! #Appollo
Moon 20 Jul 1969
@Humanity :)
Humanity 20 Jul 1969
OMG this is AMAZING! @Moon feels great! And I can see the @Earth's crescent from here! #Appollo11
Moon 20 Jul 1969
@Humanity This is fun. Now I know how @Earth must feel all the time.
Earth 20 Jul 1969
@Moon You have no idea...
Pluto 20 Jul 1969
@Humanity Not bad, not bad. Baby's first steps. #SlowClap
Humanity 9 Apr 1976
Hmmm. @Pluto appears to be extremely reflective. Must be a lot smaller than 5,900 kilometers.
Mercury 9 Apr 1976
@Humanity AS I SAID, NOT A PROPER PLANET...
Humanity 5 Sep 1977
#Voyager1 and #Voyager2 will fly by all the outer planets! \o/
Pluto 5 Sep 1977
@Humanity ALL the outer planets? Try to catch ME! :-P
Humanity 5 Sep 1977
@Pluto Why do you hide from me :(
Pluto 5 Sep 1977
@Humanity It's more fun! :D
Humanity 20 Jun 1978
Huh. @Pluto has a weird bump?
Humanity 22 Jun 1978
Aaaah! @Pluto has a moon! This confirms that @Pluto must be smaller than first thought.
Humanity 23 Dec 1993
Okay, getting closer to @Pluto's real diameter. 2390 kilometers! That's even smaller than little @Mercury
Mercury 23 Dec 1993
@Humanity HEY! I'M NOT LITTLE! :/
Humanity 6 Oct 1995
Discovered a planet outside of the #SolarSystem!
Pluto 6 Oct 1995
Maybe you aren't such a special snowflake after all...
Humanity 6 Oct 1995
@Pluto ... yay?
Mars 6 Oct 1995
@Humanity maybe there's life out there set out to get you >;-P
Humanity 4 Jul 1997
I can't visit @Mars myself yet, but I can send remotely controlled rovers. :D Vroom vroom! #Pathfinder #Sojourner
Moon 4 Jul 1997
@Humanity you can visit me... y u no like me anymore :(
Mars 4 Jul 1997
@Humanity this is all nice, but are you going to collect your garbage one day? and you're naming my rocks after cartoon characters? srsly?
Saturn 4 Jul 1997
@Mars As if you care...
Humanity 13 Sep 2006
Thinking about it, @Pluto isn't a real planet. It's a dwarf planet.
Mercury 13 Sep 2006
@Pluto SEE, SEE? BUT WHO'S A PROPER PLANET? ME, THAT'S WHO!
Pluto 13 Sep 2006
@Humanity @Mercury Lol, I don't care. You still don't know what I look like. :)
Humanity 13 Sep 2006
@Pluto Oh, haven't I told you about #NewHorizons? Will be with you soon! :D :D
Pluto 13 Sep 2006
@Humanity What?
Mercury 13 Sep 2006
@Humanity LOL @Pluto YOU'VE BEEN OWNED
Humanity 14 Jul 2015
First photos from the dwarf planet @Pluto! Finally!
Humanity 14 Jul 2015
Whoohoo! I feel like I can do anything now! I love the future! I love the universe! #BoomDeYada #BoomDeYada
