Chapter Text
Her first day of preschool and she was scared. She didn't want to be away from her mama.
“Mik come on, you’ll see me at the end of the day,” her mom said to her but that was too long for Mikkel.
She sniffled and shook her head in the back of the car. She couldn’t speak which frustrated her greatly.
She wanted to tell her mama that she didn't want to go but all she could do was make a random assortment of noises to express her objection to this.
Her mama parked the car, she didn't like the car because it was loud. Mikkel wriggled and squirmed in her mother’s arms as she forced her into the building, it was colorful and bright. She didn’t like it not because of the bright colours but because of it.
Something was following her, she knew it, and she didn’t like it. She couldn’t explain to her mama though, she couldn’t speak; something her mother was scared about.
She had taken her to many doctors to figure it out, she didn’t like doctors.
Mama was distressed after they said she has Autism, but she doesn't know what that is all she knows it distressed her mama. Does that mean something was wrong with her?
She didn't want something to be wrong with her. Especially if it caused her mama stress.
She continued to squirm in her arms, she wanted to run back to the car.
She brought her into a loud class, kids his age ran amuck and it was loud. Way too loud.
“Hello, you must be Mrs Kølher–” A new adult started to say.
“Please, call me Emily, and I’m not married,”
“Oh?” the adult smiled, “Okay, Hello Emily, is this Mikkel?”
‘How did this adult know his name?’ Mikkel thought to herself
“Yeah, she’s… She’s not exactly happy to be her,” Her mama said ruffling her hair. She didn't like it when Mama did that he didn't like people touching her hair it hurt.
“Well, hello Mikkel, my name is Mrs L,”
Mikkel did not trust this ‘Mrs L’ person.
She felt her mom hand her over to Mrs. L., and she felt his eyes water, she hated when this happened, she couldn’t explain what was wrong. They just thought she was hungry.
“Oh don’t worry little one, you’ll see your mama at the end of the day,” Mrs L told her, which was too long for her. She didn't want to leave her mama.
She was plopped in the middle of a bunch of other kids, they were loud, and Mrs L stood beside another adult.
“Hello boys and girls!” the other adult said in a sing-songy voice, “I am Ms K,” She scribbled something on the board but Mikkel couldn’t make it out, was she supposed to?
“Why don’t we make a circle and introduce ourselves,” She said joyfully.
The kids went into the circle miraculously, she felt as if this was abnormal for a bunch of 4 and 3-year-olds, maybe Ms. K had a way with kids.
Mikkel didn't go in the circle though, she didn't like Ms. K, and she liked her less than Mrs L.
“Come on little one, we have to get in the circle!” Ms K said again, grabbing onto her arm and dragging her to the circle.
She didn’t like that, her eyes started tearing up.
“Ms. K,” Mrs. L interrupted, “Mikkel is mute she might not understand what’s going on,”
That just made her more frustrated, she knew what was going on, she just didn't want to do it. She didn't like being with all these new people she didn’t trust, she wanted to go home.
“Oh of course,” Ms. K smiled bent down to Mikkel’s level, and started talking more slowly, “Go sit in a circle there,” she pointed to a spot where she reluctantly went to. She wanted to show them that she understood.
“Alright, everybody!” Ms K said, “Now let's go around and say our names plus something we like! I’ll go first,” She cleared her throat, “Hi, I’m Ms K and I really like Chocolate,”
The kid beside her said his name but Mikkel wasn't really paying attention; she was much more interested in what was going on outside.
She stared out the window watching the clouds. He didn't even notice Ms K calling her name.
“This stupid girl,” she heard her mumble under her breath, that wasn’t exactly what she said, she said something with an R but she didn't know that word it sounded like she was calling her stupid.
She didn't like being called a girl subconsciously at least, she didn't understand why she was considered a girl. What was considered a boy then?
Ms K said her name again and she snapped back to her, “What’s something you like?” she was obviously irritated. She noticed that Mrs L was glaring at Ms K.
“She’s mute,” she said again, “She probably didn't think she could participate,”
Ms K gritted her teeth, “of course, of course,”
They continued around the circle Mikkel tried to pay attention she really did but her mind kept wandering. It didn't help that Ms K was… Less than helpful.
She was younger than Mrs. L. Ms. K had blonde hair and ocean blue eyes, and Mikkel also had blonde hair and blue eyes but hers had a yellow ring around her pupil, something mama said daddy had.
She didn't know her dad but apparently, they looked similar. In the one picture she had of him she didn't see it.
She thought she looked more like Mama.
The day continued, although she didn't particularly understand much of it. They learned letters which were easy, until they put them together. When they put them together it blurred together and didn’t make sense.
Soon the end of the day came and her mother picked her up.
She was mad, why did Mama leave her? Did she not want her anymore?
“Hello Mikkel, did you miss me?” Her mama asked, which Mikkel promptly ignored, she huffed yes she missed her but she was still mad.
Her mom looked disappointed and sad, which made her sad, “So you didn’t?”
Mikkel didn't want her mama to be upset so she hugged well clung to her then huffed again.
“How was she today?” her mama asked looking at Mrs. L, she had grown on her a bit, she liked her more than Ms. K.
“She was wonderful, she had a hard time with letters but I’m sure that will improve with time,” Mrs L told her mama, “Although she seemed to be distracted, that might just be because it was her first day,”
-_-
It continued like that, it continued like that for months, and she wasn't happy about it, especially because of Ms. K.
Ms K was interesting, she believed in ‘tough love’ which really meant that she believed in letting kids get hurt to learn. A few of the older boys liked to push her around. She often had bruises that no one would see since they were underneath her clothes.
Since she couldn’t talk she couldn’t tell her mama, her mama just thought they were from playing.
She wasn't playing though. She wished she could tell them. Her only saving grace was Mrs L. She stopped anyone who would push her.
When she was there no one really bothered her, well aside from It.
It still followed her, whispering. She was scared. No matter where she was she felt like It was there watching her.
It happened on a day Mrs L wasn’t there. She had gotten sick if she remembered correctly. That meant it was time for the older kids to swarm her.
She was scared, it felt different today, more malicious.
She tried to ignore them, but it was deemed impossible as the first boy shoved her.
She fell hard, harder than she had before, it hurt.
She felt her eyes start to water. ‘Stop!’ she thought to herself.
She tried to get up but a boy, he was much older and thus much stronger than she was kicked her down.
It hurt.
Stop.
Please.
He grabbed a rock, it was a big rock and smashed it into her side.
She screamed, it was sharp and painful.
Then she saw it, it was staring at her laughing at her.
She cried.
Deliriously she heard screaming and crying, but it wasn't her own. No, it was the rest of the kids.
She wanted to look up but she was met with a wall of grey wind blocking her view.
She oddly enough was calmed by it, It was spinny, and she liked spinny things.
Almost as if in a trance she watched the wind circle around her, while not taking away from the pain it helped soothe her mind.
The rush of the wind drowned out the screaming, she had almost forgotten about it until the wall dissipated.
Red, red was everywhere.
Broken and mangled bodies hung from trees, which had their leaves torn off. Some were splattered across the ground and some. Some were nowhere to be found.
It wasn't just human bodies though, she caught sight of birds and squirrels that were mangled by the storm.
She wanted to start crying, she wanted to be horrified, but she was too tired and shell-shocked.
She vaguely heard sirens blaring in the background. By the time the paramedic’s got there she was already asleep.