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Anyone who knew the name Kenny McCormick knew that the boy would go to the ends of the earth for his little sister. The guy had very few soft spots, his exterior hardened by time and circumstance, but one particularly tender spot happened to be one Karen McCormick. For her, he would do nearly anything.
They were, however, still brother and sister. And the two had no problem acting like it.
The two McCormicks stood at a draw in the middle of the living room, Kenny seated on the couch with his arms crossed over his chest. Karen stood in front of the paused episode of Bob’s Burgers, hands on her hips. Eyes narrowed, ammunition loaded, and matching freckled noses scrunched in determination.
Despite the shootout that was happening to his left, Butters lounged against the cushion, idly scrolling Tik Tok as he awaited this routine sibling squabble to fizzle out like the rest. He had learned that it was better to just let these spits run their course than to make an attempt to smooth it out. It tended to be pretty clear if they got to a point where they needed a mediator, so Butters just waited patiently off to the side unless he was tagged in. He giggled at a video of a puppy, double tapping before scrolling on.
“But Ken, I wanna be Ariel!” Karen pouted. Kenny exhaled heavily, clearly trying to control his tone.
“Kare. I’m not stopping you from being Ariel.”
“But I want you to be Sebastian!”
“I don’t want to be Sebastian!” He rebutted stubbornly, cocking his head to the side. “I’ll take you trick-or-treating as Ariel - I’ll take you all over the state of Colorado as Ariel. But I’m not dressing up as a giant lobster while I do it!” Karen flailed her arms, her big frustration unable to be contained in such a small body.
“But-! It doesn’t make sense without Sebastian!” Kenny’s eyebrows shot up, making him lean forward slightly.
“Doesn’t make se- do you even know what that means? Plenty of people go trick-or-treating as just Ariel, way more than people who go with someone dressed as Sebastian!” Karen huffed, crossing her arms.
“It’s not like you’re gonna be anything else for Halloween!” Karen countered. Kenny raised an eyebrow.
“Who says?” She perked up slightly at this admission.
“What’re you gonna be then?” Kenny lounged back in his spot.
“A big ol’ pumpkin.” This piqued the girl’s interest.
“A jack-o-lantern?” Kenny shook his head, making a face. “Just a pumpkin? Well what’re you gonna wear?” Kenny bit back a smile despite himself.
“My parka.” A beat passed. Butters bit the insides of his cheeks to mask a laugh of his own.
“IS THAT IT!?” Karen shrieked, throwing her arms out to the sides. Kenny feigned innocent confusion, eyebrows raised. Her hands dragged her cheeks downward, and she looked like she was going to melt into the floor. “Please please please please, Kenny! I wanna do a matching costume and you never wear anything fun,” Kenny groaned, letting his head fall back against the couch as he rolled his eyes. “Just this once!” She hopped into his space, jostling both boys as she landed halfway in Kenny’s lap.
Butters peaked over at Kenny’s profile, pinpointing the ebbs and flows in his defenses against his beloved little sister. He watched Karen’s big puppy dog eyes, seeing the genuine sadness she would feel if her brother truly turned her down.
Kenny hated turning his sister down.
The shaggy blonde let out another loud groan, picking up his head as he pinched the bridge of his nose.
“I don’t wanna be a giant lobster, Karen! Why can’t I just put on my damn coat and walk my sister around asking for free candy!?”
Butters sighed, setting his phone down on the couch. This particular spit was taking longer than usual, and it was becoming harder to ignore. He could tell they were nearing the point of needing a mediator. He sat up with a deep exhale, resting one calm hand against Kenny’s shoulder.
“Kare, come over here real quick,” he coaxed, nodding the girl over to his side of the couch. She shuffled to the spot next to Butters, slumping in her seat. He tilted his head towards her, speaking quietly. “Kenny’s gonna blow his top soon. Is it good for anyone if Kenny blows his top?” Karen huffed and shook her head, sitting on her hands.
“I’m not blowin’ shit.” Kenny grumbled. Butters rolled his eyes, but didn’t engage. Spoken like a guy that’s about to blow his top. He nodded at Karen.
“Tell me - and there is no right or wrong answer - is it more important to you to be Ariel or to get Kenny to dress up with you?” The little girl seemed to consider this, kicking her legs idly in front of her. When she responded, it was quiet.
“To get Kenny to dress up with me.” Butters nodded, a small smile pushing at his lips.
“Okay. Well I’ll tell you, if you want him to dress up, you might have to compromise a little.” Kenny made a growling sound from behind, making Butters send a gentle, but reprimanding elbow backwards.
“Compromise how?” Karen asked, slouching. Butters listed his head side to side.
“Well…Kenny doesn’t like any unnecessary effort. You gotta make it as easy for him as possible.” Karen frowned down at her lap.
“I don’t wanna look boring, though…” Butters shook his head.
“Easy doesn’t always mean boring. And you can go all out for your costume, but he should be something that’s suuuper easy to dress up as. Maybe even just…a mask.” The word gave Butters pause, and he furrowed his eyebrows in thought.
Maybe some cheap piece of plastic was all that it took. A promise of anonymity if played right. Halloween was all about becoming someone else, after all…
Suddenly, Butters was fully on Karen’s team.
He nudged the girl, his eyes lighting up.
“If he’s still not going for it, maybe we gotta sweeten the deal a little.” Butters leaned backwards, dramatically sprawling himself across the pouting blonde’s lap. He smiled up at him. “Kenny baby,” Butters murmured, quiet and sweet. Kenny squinted down at him, crossing his arms stubbornly.
“Not you, too,” he grumbled.
“Kenny baby,” Karen echoed in a sing-song tone, crawling on top of Butters and laying across his front. Kenny turned a deadpan expression to his sister, pointing a finger in her face.
“Absolutely not.” Butters reached a hand up, resting it against the boy’s cheek. Butters smiled at the way Kenny melted into his touch, turning to look down at him. His heart warmed at the sight of his defenses coming down. It was a matter of trust between them, crumbling into the other’s hands and knowing they wouldn’t let a single piece touch the ground.
“I’ll tell you what. If you two think of a group costume that includes masks, I’ll dress up and come out with you guys, too.” He swallowed back a chuckle as both McCormicks’ eyebrows shot up.
“You’ll come with us, Leo!?” Karen exclaimed, bouncing on top of him. He let out a gutted laugh, recoiling in vain.
“Oi, don’t suffocate him, he’s on your side,” Kenny reprimanded, pushing his sister down to Butters’ waist. He tilted his head to properly make eye contact with the boy in his lap, one eyebrow raised. “What’s your angle, blondie?” Butters shrugged, a shy smile on his face.
“No angle…just seems like a good opportunity to walk around town holding hands with my boyfriend without people knowing who I am.” Kenny’s suspicion steadily melted into realization, a grin of his own taking over. Butters tucked a curl behind Kenny’s ear before letting his hand fall to his chest. “You get to be anyone you want to be on Halloween. Might as well take advantage of it.” Kenny huffed out a laugh, patting his chest.
“Have I ever told you how smart you are? I gotta tell you how smart you are more often.” Before Butters could roll his eyes and assure the boy that he showered him with compliments plenty, Karen jumped in.
“So you’ll do it, Ken? You’ll dress up with me and Leo?” Kenny glanced between his sister and his boyfriend, complementing grins side by side, before slowly closing his gaping mouth.
“We’ll brainstorm some three-person costumes tonight, Kare. See what we can come up with.” The girl cheered and bounced up and down again atop Butters, sending him into another bout of wheezy laughter.
…
That night, Butters’ phone buzzed as he brushed his teeth before bed. One hand busy with his toothbrush, he unlocked his phone with the other.
‘Kyle’: weve got the perfect costume r u readt
Butters: I am readt.
The photo that followed made Butters grin, excited laughter bubbling up and out of his mouth. He typed excitedly back.
Butters: It’s PERFECT <3
……
“Room cleaned? Dishes put away? Homework finished?”
“Yes sir.”
“Don’t stay out too late. And look both ways, okay?”
“Yes ma’am.”
“And if I get word that you were acting like a fool somewhere you know better than being, you can kiss your freedom goodbye, got it?”
“Yes sir.”
“Stay safe!”
“Keep your phone on you.”
The front door closed behind Butters, and he leapt from the top porch step into the yard before he could even catch his breath. The more distance he put between him and his house, the further his shoulders fell away from his ears.
Most of South Park’s foliage consisted of conifers, meaning that the town’s backdrop was mainly composed of green when it wasn’t white with snow. But the smattering of deciduous trees had taken on beautiful shades of orange and red, matching the vibrant sunset above. Pumpkins atop doorsteps matched, sending a warm hue down the rows of houses. Butters made his way down the street with his hands in his pockets, the neighborhood’s porch lights gradually flicking on as he went. Kids rode their bikes past him, calling after one another and laughing into the crisp air. He was no stranger to the sight, packs of boys chasing after one another with excitement biting at their heels. Butters couldn’t help but smile at the familiar sight of Halloween afternoon.
He hopped across the train tracks, balancing atop the rails like a tightrope walker. Before he knew it, he was jogging his way up the McCormicks’ porch steps and knocking briskly. A moment passed before the deadbolt turned and the door swung open. He looked down to see the long, green mask that tilted up to him in lieu of a greeting.
“Jack said we should work together!” Karen exclaimed in a screechy, croaked voice as she lurched forward at Butters. The boy laughed as he caught her, maneuvering her backward against his front into the house. He reached behind him to pull the door closed with him.
It was just plain lucky that Karen was as into The Nightmare Before Christmas as she was, coming up with the trio costume herself. Lock, Shock, and Barrel, the three impish trick-or-treaters from the movie, were the perfect characters that fit all of their specifications: interesting enough for Karen, low-effort for Kenny, and masked for Butters. What a picky bunch they were.
But oh, how it paid off, he thought to himself, looking over Karen’s outfit with a smile. She wore a purple cotton dress over a pair of black tights, her hair done up in braids maneuvered to stick out this way and that. Behind her on the coffee table sat a tall witch’s hat, completing her look of Shock the Witch.
“Kare, you’re not supposed to let the trick-or-treaters inside, we’ve talked about this.” Kenny appeared from the kitchen. He looked Butters up and down appreciatively, tongue poking out between his teeth. “This one’s cute, though. I’ll let him stay.” Butters let out a delighted hum as Kenny wound an arm around his waist and smacked a kiss to his cheek. He tried, but he couldn’t fight the smile he shone up at the other blonde. His fingers hooked on the neckline of his sweatshirt.
“I hope this isn’t how you always answer the door.” Kenny shook his head dutifully, leaning in to chase his lips.
“Oh no - just for my favorite trick-or-treater.” Butters laughed against the other boy’s mouth, the last of that parent-ensued tension melting away from between his shoulder blades. He let himself fall into this other world; the one on the other side of the train tracks where he could love his boyfriend as freely as he chose. The promise of this escape made Butters’ life at home, suffocating under his father’s thumb with nothing to fight back with, bearable.
The two pulled back from one another at the sound of kissy noises and fake retching. While Butters just rolled his eyes good-naturedly, Kenny glared down at his sister, whose mask was tilted up on top of her head and out of her face with a cheeky smile on full display. He swatted at the girl, who skillfully dodged it.
“Mind your business. I’ll kiss my boyfriend as I please.” Karen made a noise and hopped around the two.
“Well don’t spend toooo much time kissing, y’gotta get ready before it gets too late!” Butters smiled up at the other boy, hands falling to squeeze at his biceps.
“C’mon, Ken. Let’s get this party started.”
…
Butters stood in front of the bathroom mirror, hands smoothing over the oversized skeleton shirt and simple black pants. The long-sleeved t-shirt was long enough that it almost gave the illusion of being a dress as it hid any discernible bodily features from an unknowing eye. To a knowing eye, it just looked like a large shirt.
A knock at the door startled him, and Kenny peeked his head in. He wiggled into the already cramped room behind Butters, who only smiled and pressed himself to the counter to allow him entry. Kenny leaned one hand against the counter, settling the other on his hip as he watched the other boy primp himself in the mirror with an adoring smile on his face.
“Prettiest skeleton there ever was.” He mused. Butters flushed shyly, bumping his hip against his. He observed the other blonde’s old Broncos sweatshirt and black sweatpants.
“Y’look good. Was that low effort enough for you?” Kenny looked down at his “costume” with a smirk.
“Just right.” Kenny reached out to tap the boy’s chin. “You know me so well.”
“Sweetening the deal works wonders.” Butters turned to pick up the round skeleton mask from the closed toilet seat, gingerly cradling the final element that would truly erase any identifiable aspect of his appearance.
“Is it silly how excited I am for tonight?” He whispered, his fingers tracing at the plastic features. A hand on his lower back made him look up at the mirror to meet Kenny’s green eyes. He took a step closer.
“If it is, we’ll be silly together.” Butters looked back down at his mask before bringing it to his face. Large, Tim Burton eyes and a smile to match disguised his features. The promise of anonymity made him grin.
“Let me do your eye makeup,” Kenny offered, turning Butters toward him. The latter smiled, setting the mask back down in the sink.
“I could do it myself,” Kenny hummed at this, popping open the old smoky eyeshadow palette his mom had gotten rid of. He smudged his thumb through the darkest shade, and Butters settled his hands on his waist before closing his eyes.
“Of course you could. But between you and me,” Kenny said lowly, a whisper away from Butters’ face. He used his free hand to tilt the other’s chin upward. “I like touching you.” And with that, his thumb gently pressed against Butters’ eyelid, smearing the pigment around his eye.
Butters typically did not like being touched when he could not see the other person. If he couldn’t physically locate the perpetrator, his mind had a tendency to twist the situation quicker than he could vocalize discomfort. When he let himself think about it for too long, he pictured a young version of himself, trustfully allowing himself to be blinded only to have it bite him in the ass. Such a thing does something to a kid’s psyche.
Kenny, however, with his gentle nature, secure hold, and valleys he had etched deep into Butters’ heart, was different. He had always been different. Butters’ heart throbbed with a pang.
“You think one day we can go out on Halloween and hold hands without putting on masks?” He asked softly, feeling Kenny move below his waterline.
“Of course we will. Don’t forget about my master plan to get you out of this town.” Butters raised an eyebrow.
“And that plan is what, again?” Kenny hummed, turning his head gently to move to the other eye.
“I’m…still working on that part.” Butters couldn’t help but smile in the face of his grim circumstances.
“That part being the entire thing.” Kenny tutted reprimandingly.
“I’ve got the rest figured out, don’t worry. I’m just working on that tiny detail.” Kenny paused to gather more makeup onto his thumb. Butters’ fingers patiently fiddled with the waistband of his sweatpants. “We’ll move out somewhere warm and sunny. Maybe California. And we’ll have a two bedroom apartment that probably costs an arm and a leg so Kare can stay with us until she can go off to school.” Butters’ hummed, the scene painting itself out behind his eyelids. “It isn’t the most romantic, but I can’t leave her here. Hope you don’t mind a little girl as a roommate.” Butters huffed out an incredulous laugh.
“She is absolutely not staying here. She’s getting out, too.” Kenny chuckled warmly.
“I’ll go off and do whatever Dr. McCormick does. Fair warning, I’ll probably have to moonlight as a stripper to pay for a doctorate.” Butters scoffed, pinching at his side.
“No. You’re a genius and a go-getter so you’ll score all kinds of scholarships. They’ll be begging you to come on out and work with them.” Kenny hummed thoughtfully.
“Okay, then I’ll moonlight as a stripper recreationally.” Butters kicked playfully at where he assumed his foot was. “You’ll go do whatever you want to do. Whatever it is, it’ll probably pay millions just because you’re so inherently talented.” Butters didn’t know what he wanted to pursue after high school, his mind too busy trying to make it through high school. He had to admit, he liked this wide open canvas of a life in California Kenny described.
“You’ll probably join a yoga class in a park on the weekends. We’ll have a dog or two, or maybe even a blue-tongued skink.” Kenny pulled his hand away, and the snap of the makeup palette signaled that he was done. But Butters kept his eyes closed, not wanting to break the daydream of wide expanses of blue sky and actual warm sun on his fair skin. He swallowed.
“What else?” He asked, barely more than a whisper. Kenny draped his arms over his shoulders.
“I’ll take you out every Thursday, because our schedules happen to line up so we both get home early on that day. We’ll walk into town holding hands and eat at the finest restaurants and probably run into Brad Pitt or something because he’s eating there too. And all during dinner I get to hold your hand or lean over and pretend there’s something on your face to wipe away. Or maybe we’ll just sit on the same side of the booth and make out the whole time. And people may roll their eyes at us but nothing bad will actually happen because we won’t be here.”
Butters’ eyes opened at that, glistening hopefully. But alas, he was only met with the sobering reality of the cracked ceiling above and the smell of mildew around them. He blinked as he remembered himself, throwing on layers of clothing to disguise any discernible feature of his so he could maybe hold his boyfriend’s hand in public.
Butters picked up the mask one more time, holding it in front of his face. The skin visible around his eyes where the plastic of the mask ended was now black, making it even harder to tell who exactly sat under there. He looked up at Kenny, and was comforted by the simple image of him. He sighed, dropping the mask and letting himself tip forward to rest his cheek against his collarbone.
“You promise, Ken?” He asked softly. The kiss that Kenny pressed to his temple was firm, as if trying to push it all the way through his skull and into his brain.
“I can’t promise Brad Pitt will be there every Thursday…but the rest of it, yes.” Butters smiled and wrapped his arms fully around Kenny’s waist, choosing to, once again, put his trust into this boy. It hadn’t steered him wrong yet.
…
“Alright, one of just Kare…then one of me and Kare…then Leo, go ahead and set it up for a self timer and get on in here.”
Butters propped his phone up on the coffee table, tapping the ten second countdown and pulling his mask over his face. He hurried to Kenny’s side, where one arm was wrapped securely around his waist and the other draped over Karen’s front.
“Everyone sayyyy ‘kidnap mister Santy Claus!’”
“Kidnap Mister Santy Claus!” At the flash, the trio broke, bustling around the living room to gather their last minute items.
“Wait, I gotta get a picture of you two!” Karen objected, making the masked Kenny and Butters glance at one another. Butters could see Kenny’s grin through the plastic.
“You heard the little lady, get over here, Barrel.” Butters let out a yelp of a laugh as he was snagged by the waist, pulled against Kenny’s front like a ragdoll. His hands grasped Kenny’s forearms, and the latter bent slightly to press their cheeks together in a cheesy hug for the camera. After the click, Kenny tilted his mask up to the top of his head with a goofy smile at his boyfriend, loosening his grip on his waist with a kiss to his temple. Butters smiled like a dog getting affection, and he was pretty sure Karen got a picture of that, too.
“Alright - we gotta get going. Leo, send me and my mom those pics. Karen, you got your shoes on? Got your pillowcase?” Kenny stuffed his keys in his pocket, pointing at the other two like a maestro cueing his orchestra.
“Check and check!” Karen chirped, hopping excitedly towards the door. Butters pulled the black gloves over his hands and fiddled with the green, open face ski mask that sheltered the parts of his head the mask didn’t cover. He released an antsy exhale, shaking himself out before lowering his mask. Despite his nerves, he couldn’t help but grin as Kenny opened the door. The three filed out, turning off the porch light and locking the door behind them.
“Halloweeners on three, one two three,”
“Halloweeners!”
The trio made their way down the street, a quicker pep in their step than usual. They still had a little while to go until Karen could start knocking on doors, as Kenny insisted that no one on this side of the tracks had anything to give out. For now, the three were just out for a walk in the crisp dusk of South Park.
As Karen recounted her exciting day of elementary school, the two boys walked behind her side by side.
“And then we went to music class and got to play with the percussion instruments. My favorite was the conga.”
“The conga!” Butters exclaimed. She nodded, skipping ahead.
“It’s also called the tumbadora. Did you know that they were made by…” Butters couldn’t help but jerk at the caress against his hand, shooting wide eyes down to where the back of Kenny’s just barely brushed his. He looked up to where Kenny peeked at him carefully through the mask, a message loud and clear even from behind that wall of plastic.
Ready when you are.
Butters looked back down at his hand. It was a cheap costume - maybe anyone could recognize him if they tried hard enough.
But no one had any reason to try that hard. And his favorite thing about Kenny had always been how brave he made him feel.
Butters took Kenny’s hand tightly in his own as they stepped over the railroad tracks. He held his breath for a moment, as if bracing for impact or a shout from down the street. But alas - nothing. He huffed out an almost giddy laugh at the way the world didn’t explode all around him. Kenny shook their hands side to side slightly as if to say look at us now.
There was a tonal shift as they went further down the lamp lit street, and Butters gawked at the picturesque image of a Halloween night before him. Houses were lit in some variation of orange, purple, and green, the pumpkins on stoops now lit from the inside. Leaves rattled across the pavement, sending a chill down the street and up into the air. Groups of families and friends meandered house to house with laughter and excited shouts, dressed to the nines in some department store disguise.
Butters blinked from behind his mask. He watched them with a careful eye, looking for any sign that they had found a crack in his armor and would tear him apart for it. However, despite everyone that passed the trio, no one gave him a second glance. He let out a shaky exhale that the mask pushed back at him, as if it too were taking a deep breath to steel itself.
“Hey.” Kenny squeezed his hand, drawing Butters to look up at him through the cloud of self doubt. “Maybe Karen can join Crimson Dawn.” Butters blinked, his confusion pulling him out of his own thoughts. “What, with her newfound conga skills and everything? I think she’d add a little much-needed zest.”
It took Butters a minute to understand what Kenny was talking about, and he was certain it was evident in the way that he gawked at the boy. After a moment he let out a surprised laugh, his shoulders relaxing with the release. He saw that glint in Kenny’s eyes, the kind that told him Kenny knew exactly what he was doing. It was a tactic that screamed get out of your head, and Butters squeezed his hand in quiet thanks.
“I dunno if Jimmy is looking to share the drummer position.”
“What’s Crimson Dawn?” Karen piped up, looking inquisitively between the boys.
“Our band,” Kenny responded nonchalantly, making Karen gasp and turn. Her eyes were wide behind the mask.
“You guys are in a band!?” She crowed, making Butters grin.
“When we were little we were,” he clarified. “Me, Ken, Stan, and Jimmy. That was about when your brother first learned the bass.” Karen hopped up and down.
“Were you guys any good!?” She asked excitedly. Kenny made a gleeful noise behind his mask, steering her gently toward the first house on their right and up the walkway.
“We were an acquired taste. C’mon - those treats aren’t gonna trick themselves.”
They followed Karen down the street like that, door to door with Kenny and Butters waiting a few feet back while the girl rang doorbells. As time passed, Butters became more confident in his anonymity, the tension between his shoulders replaced by the gleeful mirth of getting away with something. All through the neighborhood, they let the magnets that seemed to be implemented within each of them find one another, their hands clasped, their shoulders brushing, their touch roaming.
It’s so silly, Butters thought as Kenny leaned into him with a belly busting laugh. He leaned his weight right back against him. And yet, it feels like I’m on top of the world.
As they walked, Butters considered the possibility that letting someone love openly put them there, on top of the world like the star on a Christmas tree. Other people took this for granted. He would never forget this feeling.
“Hey, it’s Kyle and Ike!” Karen pointed, tugging at Kenny’s arm. The two boys followed her finger to where the two Broflovski boys walked toward them. Ike waved happily, his partly toothless grin the cherry on top of his Frankenstein costume.
“Sick costume, Ike,” Kenny complimented, slapping the beaming kid a high five.
“Thanks, Kenny. Kyle painted my face!” Kenny looked up at Kyle, giving him a good once over as he did. He gave a disinterested hum.
“Seems he used up all of his creativity on you, bud.” Kyle scoffed at the jab, tossing his cape stubbornly over his shoulder. Kenny patted Ike’s shoulder. “How about you and Kare go hit this house and we’ll wait for you down here.” The two kids took off together, falling into some kind of organic chatter that only young children could do at the drop of a hat.
“You’re literally just in a mask, Kenny. I at least went one step further and put on a cape, too.” Butters couldn’t help but laugh at Kyle’s snark, looking over the redhead’s simplistic costume. It really was just an eye mask and a cheap Velcro cape over a plain red coat. Kyle was clearly in the same boat as Kenny, dressed up just enough to fit the social norm of Halloween.
Kyle nodded to Butters.
“You suffocating in there yet?” Butters bit his lip and grinned, shaking his head.
“It’s pretty cozy in here. I’d wear it more often if it wasn’t, y’know, a skeleton.” Kenny dropped his hand to slide his arm over his shoulders.
“We can make something work.” Kyle shook his head at the two, turning to look back down the street from where he came.
“I will say, I don’t think anyone has clocked who you are. I overheard Mr. Garrett ask his wife who Kenny McCormick’s pretty new skeleton girlfriend was.” Kenny let out a gleeful crow as he jostled Butters by the shoulders, who bit back a smile as he rolled his eyes.
“Pretty? You can literally see zero defining features.”
“Must be those opulent curves. Kyle, I’m always telling him-“
“I do not want to know what you are always telling him about his opulent curves, Kenny.” Kyle cut him off, slicing a hand through the air. Butters, red in the face, hip-checked his boyfriend admonishingly.
“Just look at that volume!” Kenny giggled, throwing himself across the sidewalk dramatically. Butters and Kyle twinned in the way that they rolled their eyes and waved the blonde off.
“I guess that’s good,” Butters shrugged, turning to look down at his costume. “Them thinking that I’m a girl throws them off my scent. Even less reason for it to be traced back to me.” Anyone from school could see Kenny walking Karen around, holding hands with a masked figure and immediately know it was Butters, but that wasn’t who he was worried about. It was the adults in this town that gossiped and nitpicked, who would run to tell his parents as soon as they had a hunch it was actually Leopold Butters Stotch under that mask.
A chill ran up Butters’ spine at the thought, and he turned to see Ike and Karen marching down the driveway. He smiled at the two of them, shoving his anxieties to the back of his mind for now. Someone without an identity couldn’t have anxieties. At least for tonight, he just wanted to be faceless.
“Anything good?” Kenny asked, peeking into his sister’s pillowcase. She opened it wider for him to see.
“Some Nerds and a Twizzler.” She reached in and pulled out a bag of gummy bears, holding them out to Butters. Her eyes were kind behind the plastic. “Want some gummy bears? I picked them because they’re your favorite.” Butters’ chest throbbed with adoration, taking the plastic packaging and pulling her into a side hug.
“You’re too sweet, Kare. Thank you.”
Maybe being known didn’t always have to be so scary.
Kenny, Butters, and Karen continued through town, the night carrying them from house to house with ease. Eventually, the three found themselves walking along Butters’ street. The boy was pretty sure Kenny could sense his tension returning as he made to redirect them.
“C’mon Karen, we’re skipping this street-“
“No,” Butters surprised them both by shaking his head, his mind filled with a stubborn sort of determination. He looked up at Kenny, whose eyebrow was raised cautiously. Butters nodded. “I want to keep going.” Kenny’s eyes flitted between the street ahead and his boyfriend, a slight smile creeping onto his face. He just nodded in agreement, patting Karen’s shoulder.
“You heard him, Kare. Full steam ahead.” They followed behind the little girl, hand in hand, and it felt like dancing along a minefield.
As Butters stood before each of his neighbors without any degree of a reaction, he felt his chest swell with triumph and his spine straighten with confidence. They approached Cartman’s front door, standing a few feet behind Karen as she rang the doorbell. The door was answered by none other than the boy himself, his round face uninterested as he held a bucket of candy. Karen held out her pillowcase.
“Trick-or-treat!” Cartman squinted at the girl first, clearly recognizing the voice and trying to place it. His gaze caught on Kenny, and it only took a moment for his face to flood with recognition. He barked out a surprised laugh.
“You almost had me, Kenny, but that damn parka gives you away like a flare gun!” Kenny grinned, fidgeting with his mask.
“I dunno, dude, I think I’d make a pretty good Scooby-Doo villain.” Eric switched his gaze over to Butters, who had grown accustomed to not speaking at doors tonight. He smiled and raised his free hand to wave.
“Hiya, Eric,” he greeted. Eric snorted another laugh.
“Ahh, I see what’s going on here. Hey, not too bad. I wouldn’t clock you guys if it wasn’t for his traffic cone-lookin’ ass.” He held the bucket out to Karen, letting her root through the goodies as he turned to where the Stotch residence sat. “You’re pretty brave, coming this close.” He raised a sly eyebrow down at Butters. “What would dear old dad say?” The look Eric gave him made Butters’ stomach swirl, and he immediately wanted him to stop looking at him like that. He clenched his jaw and shook his head.
“Doesn’t matter because we’ll be careful.”
“Don’t be weird, Cartman, just give me a Snickers.” Kenny brushed him off, making Eric smile but pluck a candy from the bucket. He tossed the wrapped chocolate to the taller blonde.
“Just staying in the scaaaary spirit. You guys be careful out there tonight.”
“Thank you, Eric,” Karen chirped before the door closed behind him. Butters saw Kenny shake his head as he led the other two back to the street.
“All bark and no bite. Dude is always on the lookout for pots to stir.” Butters tried to shake off the slimy feeling that lingered over him as they got down to the street. They turned to continue towards Butters’ house and Kenny nodded at his sister. “You go do this one on your own, Kare, we’ll wait down here.”
“No, wait,” Butters’ mouth was working before he could even get a handle on it, surprising all three of them. Kenny raised an eyebrow.
“Leo, don’t let whatever Cartman said-“ Butters shook his head, feeling lightheaded with…determination? Confidence? Whatever it was, it was strong enough to pull him in the direction of his front door.
“Cartman has nothing to do with it. I wanna go up with her.” Kenny looked like he wanted to fight it, like he wanted to protect Butters from the possibility of things going awry. But at the end of the day, it was Butters’ risk to take. He conceded with a nod.
“If you’re sure.” Kenny nodded up to the house. “Lead the way, Kare.”
As they made their way up the walkway, part of Butters felt like he was walking into a death trap. But the other part of him, the one that had been leading the charge all night, basked in the power of his facelessness. He wanted to stand in front of his parents as a boy holding hands with a boy, even if they didn’t know he was doing it.
Karen looked back at the two, her hand hovering over the doorbell. Her eyes darted between them.
“Can I go?” She asked quietly. Butters nodded as he fiddled with his mask, Kenny moving his arm to protectively lay across his shoulders. The familiar sound of his doorbell made the boy gulp. He wound his own arm around Kenny’s waist, tucking his thumb in his belt loop. The front door swung open.
Stephen Stotch stood there, in that ugly burnt orange button down he had worn to work earlier with a bowl of candy in one hand. Karen stuck out her bag.
“Trick-or-treat!” The man smiled in a way that made Butters’ gut tighten.
“What a neat witch you are! Very creative!”
“I’m Shock,” Karen said proudly, puffing out her chest. Recognition clicked in the man’s eyes, looking her and Kenny over quickly.
“Are those the McCormick kids under there? Almost didn’t recognize you.” As Karen voiced an affirmative, his gaze moved to Butters.
It didn’t last long, but he could tell the man was trying to decipher who was being paraded around on Kenny McCormick’s arm. His eyes felt like fire as they went up and down his body. When he didn’t immediately look away, Butters reached up to thread his gloved fingers through Kenny’s that sat on his shoulder.
It was some sort of power, though veiled behind multiple layers of a costume. It was a step - a tiny, tiny step - out of the closet that his father didn’t know existed. Truthfully, what would his dad do if he knew it was his son tangled up with a boy standing in front of him?
Butters knew neither he nor his father were ready to find out, but it did open his lungs a little wider. There was power in the secrets the two boys kept, and standing here, on his own front porch, Butters reveled in it.
Stephen’s gaze broke as he dug around in the candy bowl.
“Well, you kids stay out of trouble tonight. I’ll give you three, one for you, one for your brother, and one for his, uh, girlfriend.” Butters felt a rush of relief. The man was none the wiser.
Karen giggled at his words, too, closing up her bag with a silly little ‘ew’ passing her lips.
“Thank you!” She grinned. Kenny raised his free hand in a polite wave.
“Thank you, sir. Have a nice night.” Butters didn’t say anything as they turned and walked away, knowing it was coming across as rude but being too silently elated to care. He beamed as Kenny lifted his own mask to press a kiss to the top of his covered head, and sincerely hoped his dad was still watching.
Later that night, as the moon rose higher and Karen’s bag became heavier, the troop found themselves making their way back to the McCormick residence. Slowly they trudged away from the main part of town, back toward the train tracks.
“I don’t wanna go home yet.” Karen murmured around a yawn from where she sat atop Kenny’s shoulders. Kenny kept one secure hand on her calf, the other loyally holding Butters’ hand.
“Well you know the rule - we can stay out as long as you can carry your own bag.” Kenny said gently, the full pillowcase swinging against Butters’ leg. “And you can barely carry yourself right now.” Karen made a sleepy little noise.
“But the candy’s so heavy.”
“Then it’s time to go home, Kare Bear.”
Butters rested his temple against Kenny’s shoulder as they approached his house, a strange sadness settling over him.
“I don’t wanna go home either, Karen.” He sighed. He turned to look at Kenny, smiling sadly behind his mask. “I’ve had a lot of fun tonight.”
“Why’s it have to end then?” Karen pouted, voicing Butters’ inner dialogue. Kenny hummed, squeezing her leg.
“Because if it didn’t, then it wouldn’t be as special. We’d have nothing to look forward to.” Butters thought about how some things could be special but shouldn’t require an occasion. He shouldn’t have to put on a costume just to hold his boyfriend’s hand.
Kenny seemed to be able to hear Butters’ internal dialogue, sliding his hand across his upper back and pulling him under his arm. The three made it back to the house, where Kenny knelt to let Karen climb off his shoulders. Butters passed her her bag, and Kenny passed her his keys from his pocket.
“Go tell Mom all about tonight. We’ll be in in a sec.” The boys watched as she disappeared into the house, leaving them on the street alone. Butters reached forward, slotting his hand into Kenny’s one more time.
“I’m happy we got to go out…act like any old couple.” Butters whispered, part of it feeling like a confession. He smiled at his feet, his own sappiness making him blush. “Made me thankful that we could be together at all.” Kenny squeezed his hand.
“You’re worth it, Leo. I like you too much to let us not being able to hold hands outside pull me away from you.” Butters blushed bashfully, both hands squeezing Kenny’s. He tipped forward for a hug.
What a blessing that Butters had someone he was willing to jump through so many hoops for. What a blessing that he had someone who was willing to do the same for him. It hurt that holding hands publicly couldn’t be a more commonplace experience, but what a privilege to have something that was worth such protection. What a privilege to have something worth taking such a leap for.
Kenny draped his arms over his shoulders, pressing Butters to him as he tipped in close to his ear.
“Mark my words, Buttercup. I’m gonna take us somewhere where I can love you as loudly as you deserve.”
Butters smiled so hard he thought he may burst with adoration. There, in the middle of the empty street, disguised head to toe, he believed that this could only be temporary.
“I believe you, Ken.”