Chapter Text
Foolish awoke with a rattling gasp, his head pounding fiercely. It took him a few moments to remember where he was; the curtains in his private chambers had been drawn, leaving the room illuminated by dim, flickering torchlight. He could just make out the banners hanging on the wall, deep gold with a jester’s mask crest in the center.
Right – he was in his room, his castle. His kingdom .
He took a deep breath, his chest aching. Someone had placed a single red rose in his hands, folded over his chest. An odd touch, and the heavy scent made his head throb. He let it drop to the floor.
How long had he been gone? Certainly more than twenty-four hours, but it was hard to tell; things became so… fluid , in the void. Time slipped through his fingers like sand. There was only the darkness, pressing in on all sides, cocooning him in quiet warmth while he waited to respawn. It shouldn’t have taken that long.
He sat up with a groan, his body protesting the movement. It reminded him of the days he’d spent carrying heavy loads of materials for builds, muscles burning and joints aching.
Foolish stretched his arms over his head with a wide yawn.
“ Man , that was a long nap.”
The door to his chamber opened a crack. Foolish winced at the bright light that streamed in.
Ros stood in the doorway, a small bouquet of lilies in her hand. She gasped, nearly dropping the blooms.
“My king! You’re – you’re back?”
Foolish beamed. “Yeah, I’m back! What, did you think I’d be gone forever? Come on now!”
Ros blinked, stumbling over her words.
“I mean, yeah, but – I’m very happy to see you’re back!”
“It’s good to be back.”
As Foolish stood from his bed, a wave of dizziness washed over him. He wavered a moment, gripping the bedpost.
“Are you alright, my king?” Ros asked, setting the flowers aside. She stepped closer, reaching toward him. “You look a bit pale…”
Foolish waved her off with an easy smile. “Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. Just stood up a little too fast, that’s all.”
He saw Ros frown, clearly not convinced, but she didn’t press him.
“Okay, if you say so…” She tugged on her braid. “Well…unfortunately, we have not punished the people who murdered you yet.”
“Oh…?” Foolish rubbed his neck, flinching as he felt the muscles twinge.
“But I do think it would be beneficial to get your side of the story,” Ros said. She didn’t seem to notice the king’s hesitance.
“Yeah, I’m sure we, uh…all have a lot to say,” Foolish said, carefully. “But it is nice to be back!”
Ros clasped her hands, bouncing on her feet. “Oh, joyous day! I feel so much joy and whimsy in my heart right now. Do you feel joy and whimsy in your heart, king?”
“I’m feeling quite whimsical, actually! Yeah, this is good!”
“Oh! Before I forget, take these,” Ros said, producing two shining golden apples from her satchel. “You’ve been asleep for quite some time, this should help you get your strength back.”
Foolish’s mouth watered. “Oooh, my favorite!”
He tore into the apples with the viciousness of a predator, juice running down his chin.
Ros paused, but didn’t comment on the inherently un-kingly display. “I’m just so happy you’re back, my king! I’m almost lightheaded, I-I feel like I could cry.”
Foolish swallowed, wincing as his stomach lurched sharply.
“No, no, it’s okay! This is a happy day!” He assured her. “And hopefully it’ll stay happy.”
An all-too-familiar voice piped up, outside the door. “Yeah, hopefully!”
Rage flooded Foolish’s veins like molten iron. He crushed the apple core in his hand.
“Mother fucker !” he snapped. “Er – mother fudger , what are you doing here?!”
“Foolish,” Bad cooed with a sickly-sweet laugh. “How are you doing? I’m in your walls! Literally!”
Ros scowled. “What are you doing here, Bad? The king is recovering!”
“Yeah! Recovering!”
“Oh, is he in his sick bed?” Bad asked, sounding far too excited. “I can cure him!”
Foolish’s head swam.
“Don’t touch me!” He pressed a hand to his forehead, willing the room to stop spinning.
“But Foolish!” Bad whined.
“How many lives do you have, scumbag? Still just the one?”
“We will change that soon, king,” Ros said, lowly.
Foolish forced himself to straighten, trying to shake off the lingering dizziness. “Yeah, pretty sure you owe me two lives now, Bad.”
There was a pause outside the door. “Well…if you think about it, the creepers kind of took care of that…”
“No! That doesn’t count!” Foolish stomped over to the door, pounding on it with his fist. “You put an axe in my chest and an arrow in my head!”
Ros gasped. “Bad! How could you?”
“He asked me to!” Bad protested. “At least the arrow, not the axe.”
“So either way, you admit that you owe me one.”
“Fine! Whatever! Can you just open the door?”
Foolish took a breath to steady himself, and reached for the doorknob. BadBoyHalo – worst friend, best enemy, eternal nuisance – stood in the hallway, his eyes shining bright from under his hood. Bad visibly relaxed when Foolish met his gaze.
“Oh,” he said, with rare sincerity. “It’s so good to see you again. I missed you.”
Foolish ignored the warmth that bloomed behind his ribs. “Yeah, well, you wouldn’t have to miss me if you hadn’t killed me. If I could, I’d lock you away somewhere deep .”
Bad bristled. “Hold on, you’re really not going to tell anybody that you told me to shoot you in the back?”
Ros reached for her scabbard. “Bad! Do not spread lies!
“Yeah, don’t spread lies,” Foolish said, grinning triumphantly.
“WHAT?!” Bad squawked. “Okay, well then what about your co-murderer Seapeekay? He held you down while I shot you!”
“Nope! Wrong!”
“Wrong?! That’s not a lie!”
Ros placed a firm hand on Bad’s shoulders. “Step away, Bad.”
Bad didn’t move. He squinted at Foolish.
“Alright, fine. Maybe your head is hurting, and that’s why you can’t remember Seapeekay holding you in place while I shot an arrow point-blank at the back of his head.”
Foolish snorted. “Nice try. I actually don’t have any memory loss.”
Ros stepped forward, getting close to Bad’s face. “If you’re gonna stay here, you’ll be answering some questions.”
“Oh, of course ,” Bad said, grinning widely with wickedly sharp teeth. “I will gladly enlighten everyone on what really happened the other day. There have been so many nasty rumors going around while you’ve been indisposed, Your Majesty.”
“I don’t doubt that,” Foolish grumbled. “Right. Ros, call everyone into the throne room.”
Typically, he reveled in the chaos that followed in his wake. In a world of constancy, Foolish delighted in doing the unexpected, even if it wasn’t always wise. If he weren’t the king, he would simply let his subjects sort things out themselves while he sat back and watched. However, the fact that BadBoyHalo was involved warranted Foolish’s direct supervision over any further discussions. The demon chatted idly while they walked to the main hall, but it sounded garbled, like he was speaking underwater.
“Foolish? Did you hear me?”
Foolish blinked. “Huh? Uh, no, sorry. What are you babbling about?”
“What?!” Bad squawked. “Aren’t kings supposed to listen to their subjects? Ros, is this the man you’re loyal to?”
“Yes,” Ros said, shooting a glare at Bad.
“You literally are not one of my subjects,” Foolish added. “Even if you were, I wouldn’t listen to you!”
Bad made a strangled sound. “Unbelievable!”
The throne room was already buzzing with conversation as the trio entered. Sneeg stood against the wall, arms folded. Bekyamon sat beside him, speaking in a hushed tone. They watched Bad carefully as he passed.
Owen, pacing by the door, stopped in his tracks.
“My king! Thank goodness you’re back!”
“It’s good to see you too, jester,” Foolish said, nodding to him.
“You arrived just in time, Your Majesty. There were concerns about war breaking out if we didn’t discover the truth behind your death!”
Foolish blinked. “Well we don’t want that, do we?”
“Why don’t you tell us what happened, in your own words?” Sneeg asked, shooting an icy glare toward Bad.
Moving to stand beside his throne, Foolish did his best to explain his decision to give up his life for the Red faction. In his absence, his subjects had fought valiantly to learn what had become of him, which had apparently caused some confusion. Bad had tried to convince them that Baghera was behind all of it. But since Baghera had died the day after Foolish – one of Bad’s convenient “accidents” – she couldn’t be questioned. Bad had also, incidentally, taken Foolish’s will before his subjects could get ahold of it. Pili arrived a bit late, and was reluctantly allowed inside to testify.
After a while, Foolish was struggling to keep his eyes open. How could he be so tired? He’d slept for a week!
Foolish pressed his palms into his eyes. Everyone’s voices overlapped into an intangible cacophony, barely audible above the ringing in his ears. He leaned against the throne as his knees grew weak. A wave of dread crashed over him.
No. Not here.
Kings were strong, unbreakable; Foolish couldn’t afford to be anything less, in the eyes of his people. He took a step, intending on returning to his chambers. As soon as he let go of the throne, however, he stumbled as the room seemed to tilt. It felt like his limbs had been turned to stone. Foolish sensed the energy in the room shift almost instantly – someone grabbed his arm with a rough, calloused hand. Through the shrill whine piercing his skull, he could hear them speaking to him in an urgent tone.
“Sorry,” he tried to say. His tongue felt thick. The throbbing ache in his head sharpened into a pickax chiseling at his brain. “Think I need to, um…lie down…”
His vision went dark before he hit the floor.