Chapter Text
Sonic hates water.
No, not hates – fears.
He doesn’t know where this fear came from. Or how he could fear something his friends seem to enjoy so much. All he knows is that for as long as he can remember, even the sound of water causes shivers to go up his spine. He tries so hard to shower, to properly clean his quills and skin and fur, but the feel of that liquid makes him lock up; sometimes so badly that he wakes up some time later with freezing water pelting him, making it worse. So, he took to using wipes and sometimes grooming with his tongue.
And to be honest, being forced to swim just makes it worse.
For example, right now.
“Come on Sonic,” Amy’s overly sweet voice calls as she tries to drag the cobalt hedgehog to the crashing waves of the ocean. She wasn’t happy when he told her he was too cowardly to go to the swimming lessons she signed him up for.
“Amy, no!” His voice rises a few octaves as he digs his heels into the sandy beach.
“Come on Hedgehog,” Knuckles huffs, and Sonic is suddenly grabbed from behind and lifted into the air.
He lets out a shriek and thrashes, but this doesn’t deter the Echidna. The fourteen-year-old can only watch in horror as the water gets closer and closer; as he gets deeper and deeper. Suddenly, Knuckles winds back his arm and throws the hero; and Sonic is submerged in the freezing abyss. His arms thrash weakly before he goes limp and just focusses on holding the small amount of oxygen that he was able to gain in.
His emerald eyes drift close, his body lax, he just wants to get out. His body drifts, his mind remains on keeping his lips tightly closed. He wants Shadow. Shadow would never force him in the water if he told him “no”.
Something touches his ankle; he twitches slightly but remains still.
His mind suddenly goes blank and he knows nothing more.
“ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR FUCKING MIND?!”
Shadow?
“W-we thought-”
“What?! You thought what?!”
Who was Shadow yelling at?
“Sonic told you ‘no’! You should have listened to him!”
Me? What?
A feminine voice scoffs, and he hears a soft thud, like someone stomps their foot. “He’s just being dramatic, Shadow!”
“Dramatic?”
Uh oh, Shadow’s voice just took a softer hue. He was going to shoot someone.
Whoever pissed him off, didn’t seem to realize the trouble she walked into. “Yeah! He doesn’t like water and absolutely pretends to be scared of it, so he doesn’t have to get in it.”
“Pretends”? What? Just who was this bitch?! What does she know about his phobias?!
“Pretends?”
Oh... Shadow was actually going to kill her. Sonic should probably get up and stop him. But... it was so warm and not suffocating where he was now.
“Yeah, there’s no way someone like Sonic can be afraid of something so arbitrary as water. ”
Ouch. That one hurt.
“Really. All of you believe this?”
“Well...”
“Umm...”
“Unbelievable. I wouldn’t have been surprised with the dumbass Echidna thinking like that. But you, Tails? I expected you to know Sonic better than that?”
Tails?
Tails thought that he was being dramatic? His own brother thought he was faking his phobia?
Something grabbed a chokehold on him, and he felt his ears press flat against his head.
Sonic’s eyes flicker open, but the world is still a blur, his mind muddled with the aftershocks of the water’s icy grip. The cold. The choking fear. His lungs burned, and he can still feel the taste of salt on his lips, the pressure around his chest. Every instinct screamed at him to flee, but his body was too exhausted to move. It felt like something deep inside him had cracked open, and he wasn’t sure he could close it again.
“Shadow, please, you’re scaring him.” Tails’ voice is thin, fragile, like he’s trying to piece together something that’s been shattered. Sonic’s chest tightens as he hears his brother’s voice, thick with guilt.
Shadow’s presence is like a wall behind him, solid, steady, but Sonic can’t feel the comfort he’s used to. All he feels is the cold that refuses to leave his skin, the water’s touch lingering like a nightmare.
“I’m not scaring him, Tails.” Shadow’s voice is dangerously calm, but Sonic can hear the seething frustration in it, the edges of anger, of helplessness. “I’m trying to make you all understand that Sonic isn’t faking this. He’s not being dramatic. He’s terrified.”
Sonic’s throat tightens at the word. Terrified . Not scared. Not afraid. Terrified . It’s the kind of word you use for things that can crush you. His insides twist, a sharp pang of vulnerability cutting through him.
“Shadow, stop—" Amy’s voice tries to intervene, but she sounds shaken, unsure of how to move in the tension that’s thickening the air.
But it’s too late.
“Yeah, well, I thought it was just stubbornness,” Knuckles mutters, his voice rough. Sonic doesn’t even look at him. He can feel the awkwardness in the air, the weight of everything that was left unsaid. They never really understood, did they? How could they?
“Stubbornness?!” Shadow growls, and Sonic can practically feel the anger radiating off him, sharp and biting. “Sonic told you ‘no’. He told you he didn’t want to swim, and you forced him. You didn’t listen. You—" Shadow’s voice cracks. There’s something too raw in it, something that makes Sonic flinch. “You just... never listen.”
It stings more than the water ever did.
The words land like a blow, and Sonic feels something break inside of him. He knew—he knew they didn’t get it. But to hear it so plainly, to hear the truth in Shadow’s voice, rips something deep inside him. He wasn’t just misunderstood. They didn’t think he was worth listening to. Not really.
Sonic’s eyes sting, but he refuses to cry. Not here. Not now.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Tails sounds lost, his voice cracking. “Why didn’t you tell me it was this bad?”
Sonic’s lips part, but no words come out. What was there to say? That they had never really seen him? Not the way he needed them to. That they were too busy pushing their own idea of him onto him, instead of ever truly knowing him? Or maybe it was just too much to say, and too little to hope for. He doesn’t want to tell them the real reason he’s so terrified—so alone in this fear. He’s afraid that if he does, they’ll just see him as weaker. Dramatic . Pathetic .
“Are you serious?” A sharp, bitter voice breaks through the air, cutting through Sonic’s spiraling thoughts. He tenses, feeling a sudden coldness creep back into his bones. “Sonic’s terrified of water? Oh, give me a break.”
Sonic’s heart drops into his stomach at the sound of that voice.
“Really? He’s faking it?” The voice scoffs, filled with cruel disbelief. “He’s so dramatic .”
Sonic stiffens, the voice registering in his mind like an acid burn. His ears flatten instinctively, but he can’t fight the sharp sting.
“ I was the one who had to pull him out of the water, you idiot,” Shadow spits. His tone is venomous, a mixture of fury and something darker. Sonic hears the soft scrape of Shadow’s boots shift on the sand, and he knows—he knows—Shadow’s ready to explode.
The laughter cuts through his chest like a knife. It’s a bitter, unfeeling thing. The words burn, even though they weren’t directed at him.
Sonic squeezes his eyes shut, trying to block it out. He’s so tired of hearing the judgment, the accusations, the disbelief. So tired of pretending he’s not broken inside.
“Pretends?” Sonic whispers, his voice shaking, but he can’t stop it now. It comes out louder than he wants it to. His chest tightens, the air choking him. “You think I’m pretending ?” The words are quiet but biting, and they cut through everything. Everything . The air around him feels too thick, too stifling. “You have no idea what it’s like.”
The silence feels like it lasts for eternity. His heart thuds in his chest, louder than any sound, and his vision blurs. For a brief, fleeting moment, he wants to scream. To shout until they finally hear him. But nothing comes out. It’s like his voice is stuck somewhere deep, lost in the crushing weight of his own panic.
“Sonic…” Tails’ voice is softer now, too soft, like he’s treading on broken glass. “I’m sorry. I didn’t... I didn’t know. I should’ve known better.”
Tears sting at the corners of his eyes, but he pushes them back. No, not here. Not in front of them. But it’s so hard. He can’t breathe. He feels like he’s drowning all over again, only this time, it’s the weight of their misunderstanding that threatens to pull him under.
“I... I didn’t want to disappoint you guys. I thought... I thought you’d think I was weak.” His voice cracks, and for the first time, Sonic doesn’t try to hide it. It all spills out—his fear, his anger, the hurt he’s buried for so long.
“I didn’t want to disappoint you,” he repeats, and it feels like the most shameful thing he’s ever said.
"Sonic…" Tails says, his voice trembling, closer now, but it’s too much. Sonic can’t meet his eyes. He can’t look at any of them right now. They don’t see him. They don’t see what’s in him. Not really.
"Sonic," Shadow says softly, his hand on his shoulder, pulling him gently, forcing him to meet his gaze. "They didn’t know. But I did." His voice cracks just the slightest bit, and the edge is gone. "You don’t have to prove anything to them. Not anymore."
Sonic’s breath hitches, and for the first time, he finally lets himself crumble—just a little. He doesn’t want to be strong anymore. Not right now.
Tails is still apologizing, his voice breaking, but Sonic can’t answer. Not yet. Not when all he can feel is the weight of the fear and the loneliness. And the overwhelming relief of finally being seen, even if it’s just by one person.
And, maybe, just maybe, that’s enough.